Found This Reverse Robin Au, Where Like Dick Not Being Adopted First Changes Everything Like There Was

if i had to explain what tumblr is like i’d only show this

As an enjoyer of both as well plz carry on. I just think the difference is hilarious.

I genuinely love how in batfam fanfics….

Dick is like: little D (Damian), Timmy Tim, little wing (Jason) I’m on my way my baby bros!!!

And then in canon….

Dick: *perpetually perturbed by his codependent siblings but knows he’ll never not answer cause who else is gonna pull their dumbassses out the gutter*

Season 4 Jon Bashing his head in while listening to the older tapes: Karma is a bitch.

Jon: Wow look at all of these Freaks and Weirdos in these statements. Good thing that I'm unlike them and always logical and intelligent.

Also Jon: Supplemental-- I am in the walls.

One of the stuff I hate about reading Batman comics is that artists will drawing shit like this:

And swear to me that these are the waynes

I glow pink in the night in my room 💖 ID is in alt text!

✨Incorrect quotes✨

(Except they are real conversations that I or my friends had).

Wally: I'm going to kill myself.

Dick: Same.

Wally: ... Figuratively speaking, right?

Dick: Literally.

Wally: I'm calling your therapist.

Dick: You don't know my therapist.

Wally: Well, I'm gonna find them and then call them!

Dick: What's life without a little of risk?

Donna: A longer life.

Dick: ...

Dick: Who needs to live so long?

Random Socialite: You are just like your dad (Bruce). His genes must be strong.

Literally any of the Wayne kids (minus Damian): I'm adopted.

Tim, after going back to drinking natural fruit juice instead of five cans of Monster: I feel nutritious.

Bruce, after being told how handsome Dick is by like five people; completely confident and proud: Yeah, he got it from me.

Dick: I'm literally adopted.

Dick: The only thing I got from you is an addiction to using expensive sheets.

Tim, listening to loud music, knowing Jason was there and wanting to annoy him:

Jason, completely fed up with the world: TURN OFF YOUR MUSIC IT'S TOO HOT OUTSIDE.

Tim:

Tim: And what the hell does that have to do with it??? *proceeds to turn up the volume*

Annoying math teacher: Okay, students, do your math...

Dick: Do we do it mentally or can we use the calculator?

Teacher: Do it mentally with the calculator.

Dick, and probably the rest of the class: ???

Tim: I slept for 14 hours and I'm still sleepy.

Jason: Wtf. And I thought that sleeping 10 hours was a lot.

Damian: I don't know how you sleep more than 8 hours, you are lazy.

Steph: Let them enjoy their sleep. I can't even sleep 6 hours because of college.

Cass: 4 hours. Take it or leave it.

Bruce: At least you sleep more than 2 hours.

Dick: What the fuck did sleep mean?

Tim: I failed the natural sciences exam.

Dick: How? You said it was one of the easiest subjects.

Tim: It is!

Dick: So?

Tim: ...

Tim: I put "solar ecosystem" on the exam.

Steph: When I was little, we had to sweep the classroom at school, and since I hated sweeping, I pretended I didn't know how to do it.

Steph: Then, a classmate who always wanted to be superior, made fun of me, grabbed the broom and started sweeping for me.

Steph: She stayed sweeping the whole recess and I was able to go out and play without doing anything.

Dick: I'm so fucking proud of you.

Duke: What are you doing on the floor?

Dick, overstimulated because there is too much shit going: Floor time.

Barbara: You're autistic.

Barbara: Artist, I mean. Sorry, the phone's autocorrect.

Dick: We are having a face-to-face conversation.

(This is a bit lost in English, but in Spanish the words are "artista" and "autista", and they sound and are written in a similar way.)

Tim: Can we go to the sun if we go at night?

Duke: I swear they told me you were smart.

Damian: Who lied to you that way?

Steph: Which Hogwarts house would you be?

Dick: According to the test, I'm a Hufflepuff.

Steph: I've seen you angry.

Dick: Have you ever seen an angry honey badger?

Steph: ... Good point.

Dick: I take pills, everyday, so that I don't kill myself. 🎶

Roy: I'm dragging you to the psychologist right now.

Dick: We need an adult.

Garth: We are adults.

Dick: Responsible adults.

Roy: Normally you are the responsible adult.

Dick:

Dick: How the fuck are we still alive?

any thoughts on dick haunting the narrative despite being very much alive ?

See my favorite part about this is that Dick doesn’t haunt the entire narrative. Usually when he’s mentioned in other people’s comics (roy,Wally etc) it’s something like “thank god for dick Grayson” or “gee I sure liked working with nightwing” or even “damn I hate the fact I have to do this but nightwing asked and like he doesn’t do that” the same way all the titans reference each other.

You might get a bit more reverence out of like raven? Or Clark? Casually saying Dick Grayson is their favorite or something

But Dick Grayson specifically haunts things that are literally in anyway related to Bruce Wayne (including Bruce) and it’s entirely their fault.

Bc to haunt a narrative one must not be accessible in the narrative imo. And every single one of the bats is too chicken shit to have a normal human conversation.

Bc like Dick does show up in other characters comics, he helps out in the birds of prey, most of the fab 5 have mentioned that he stops by whenever they’re lucky enough to have a solo run -DC GIVE DONNA TROY A SOLO RUN- he helps a lot of the younger teams, he works with the league.

Now GOD FORBID BRUCE CALL HIS SON WHEN HES MENTAL BREAKDOWNING.

Bc yeah he does haunt the Batman narrative. If I had a nickel for every time I turned the page on a Batman solo comic to suddenly get 2 pages of “dick Grayson, my ward the first Robin. My greatest achievement” spat at me I would have enough nickels to buy the comic bookstore

Or in a Robin comic “dick Grayson, the first Robin, he was the blueprint” like if yall wanna act like this pick up the phone and call the man.

Like despite what I and the fandom will tell you. There has never been a time where Dick and the bats weren’t on speaking terms (Jason excluded for reasons of murder and general bitterness) but even when Dick and Bruce hated being near each other -post Jason death- they could still work together.

They just decide to go “ah yes nightwing he’s great and he could probably help wish he was here anyway I’m not gonna call him”

People will bring up Red Robin but him and Tim were solid for like 99% of that so be so fr

Anyway all I’m saying is that Batman and his Russian nesting doll collection of ever shrinking robins need therapy and maybe medication but it’s okay I love them anyway

I just got described as an "ad hating commie" by someone because I said a minute of youtube ads is unpleasant. fully spent 5 minutes arguing and defending youtube ads. insane stuff

If you see this you’re legally obligated to reblog and tag with the book you’re currently reading

I need someone to wrap Donna Troy in a blanket and surround her with everyone that loves her and allow her to fit into her skin and find a sense of peace in knowing who she is <3

I also think she gets to punch Bruce Wayne in the face