Genericfangirl57 - Why Am I Here

i turned on the light in the dining room but Tubby had been sleeping in a chair and it woke her up and she was Not Pleased

Alien: You’re telling me that in times of great distress humans have been known to suddenly gain the strength necessary to lift objects more than a dozen times their own weight?!

Human: Yeah, it’s called “hysterical strength” and it usually happens in life-or-death situations, like when someone gets stuck under a car or something and someone lifts the car to get them out. We can’t really test it though, ‘cause it only happens spontaneously.

Alien: Humans have the ability to tap into untold strength and power and you don’t even know how you do it?

Human: Pretty much, yeah. We think it has something to do with temporary analgesia, so we just don’t feel the pain we should when we pick up a 3000-pound car.

Alien: YOUR PAIN RESPONSE JUST SHUTS OFF?

Human: Yeah, it’s like an adrenaline thing? Do you not have that?

Alien: Fuck you and your entire species of tiny juggernauts.

if anyone needs me. i will be in the corner. contemplating the characters

Good times

So, short recap of this hell of a week

- starting with the US elections being the most dramatic ones ever

- Trump declares himself winner literal days before we get an official result

- The whole world's waiting for friggin Nevada to count their votes

- Trump wants to stop counting the votes, but at the same time not. He's confused, wants to involve the supreme court. Unclear why.

- with everyone's eyes still glued to Nevada, the CW airs a new episode of Supernatural, casually kicking the entirety of tumblr back into the year 2013

- Destiel becomes canon after 11 seasons / 12 years

- Castiel "dies" and somehow the internet turns it into a mainstream meme

- For about 12 hours everyone is convinced that Canon Destiel caused russian dictator Vladimir Putin to step down

- While all of us are busy freaking out about Destiel, Georgia turns blue, and we all find out via Destiel memes

- We're still waiting for Nevada

- Pennsylvania turns blue as well, and we find out via Destiel memes AGAIN

- Destiel-Antis are getting mad and Destiel-Fans are having an absolute blast after a single-word tweet. "COPE"

- Superwholock is crawling out of its grave and people bring back tumblr code and dashcon

- rumours about Sherlock season 5 to make the Superwholock chaos perfect

- Putin is NOT stepping down but that doesn't stop the memes

- Destiel is trending on Twitter ON TOP OF THE ELECTION, and it's trending in combination with Putin.

- still waiting for Nevada

- Trump declares himself winner again and gets mad at twitter for marking his tweets as incorrect

- Trump still tries to stop the ballot counting with wild accusations of cheating. Also, he really really hates the mail-in ballots.

- we still freak out over Destiel and find out that Dan and Phil dating is confirmed. Suddenly we're all 13 again.

- Trumps son tweets about starting a war

- while the whole world is STILL waiting for Nevada, Trump goes golfing, but not without declaring himself winner once more. Winner "BY A LOT".

- nothing from Nevada

- Trumps team send emails to people asking them for more money

- Biden wins Pennsylvania, now having enought electoral votes to win the presidency, fireworks all around the globe

- about 0.2 seconds after Pennsylvania has made Biden president, Nevada finishes counting.

- Joe Biden becomes the 46th President of the United States and a big bunch of people find out via destiel memes

- Trump lost the election. BY A LOT.

- "JOE IS BIDEN"

- we declare Biden the Destiel president

- Trump does not accept the election results. What a surprise.

- Trump is still golfing but his giant team of lawyers have dug up a bunch of people who claim to have witnessed cheating in the ballot counting

- Trumps lawyer team holds a press conference about their plans to fight against the cheating, leaving everyone confused about 1) their non-existent proof and 2) the very weird venue this conference was held at

- "stop the steal"

- we learn that Trump's press conference was held in the parking lot of Four Seasons Landscaping, not the luxury hotel Four Seasons.

- we also learn that Four Seasons Landscaping is located in-between a crematorium and a sex-toy shop

- Biden makes a speech and Trump finally stops golfing. Trump's fans are very mad at the democracy for being a democracy. They also hate socialism without even knowing what it means.

I hate them (lying)

Artists of different flavors 💪

every year after you turn 17 you get further away from being the age of the dancing queen and that’s my least favorite thing about growing up

I just wanted to hear this post in real life, and I chased that impulse.

Mystère à la Tour Eiffel: The French Lesbian Eiffel Tower Murder Mystery Period Costume Drama of Color in Which ZERO Lesbians Die that You’ve Been Waiting For

[with English subtitles here by the amazing sespursongles]

So I of course HAD to watch this myself to see if it was too good to be true.

It turns out, this movie was pretty much exactly what I was hoping it would be.

The murder mystery plot is funny and corny and surprising and  had a lot of twists and turns. The romance focuses on chemistry, intimacy, softness, and wooing. Two beautiful ladies in perfect gowns, hair, and makeup in gorgeous settings and lighting must somehow solve a murder mystery that has to do with the building of the Eiffel Tower, rescue each other from jail, asylums*, and many more mysterious dangers- all while casually flipping off the patriarchy so they can be together forever in eternal bliss.

The plot is basically this: Louise is a scandalously divorced woman, living with her father who coincidentally is one of the architects who helped design and construct the Eiffel Tower. After a shocking murder occurs there, a paramour foisted upon her by her father takes her on a date to a magic show where she meets the irresistibly beautiful and compelling Henriette. When Louise is framed for a second murder, Henriette offers her assistance in finding some answers before it’s too late.

It’s neither exploitatively sexual nor overly ambiguous “gals being pals.” It doesn’t take itself too seriously and it’s not trying to teach anyone a “moral lesson about [race/gender/sexuality]”; the way these aspects of the characters function in the narrative feels organic, empathetic, and relatable. You’re meant to identify with Louise and Henriette, rather than being invited to a voyeuristic display.

Overall, it’s fun, cute, awesome, and has some historical references involving detective work, architecture, psychiatry/psychology, magic and prestidigitation, and bowler hats. I’d recommend this to almost anyone, to be honest.

* slight spoilers after the cut but nothing big, with a few content notes

Keep reading

🥺😭

Illustrator Imagines a World Where Gentle Giant Animals Live Among Humans

What if we lived in a world where giant cats and dogs roamed the earth?

I think we need to talk about the under appreciated Window Seat fandom

I mean really? With the book shelves?

It’s like an alcove of happiness.

You want a whole row of individual seats? Fine, here you go. 

Or how about a whole window bed for those snugglers out there.

Curtains.. Guys this one has curtains.

Seriously? This is basically a glass cube of bliss.

 You can even get them with corners! Not enough corners? Okay.

Ba-BAM!! Corners for cocooning. 

There’s also the Roman-esque themed seat for the historians out there. 

 If you don’t want to snuggle up in blankets with hot cocoa in this then I don’t even know why you’re on this planet. I mean dat stonework. 

This one’s an entire rectangle. Just imagine all the cuddling that could happen in there. It’s practically a fortress.

This one’s fucking curved okay? it’s just chillin, up of the ground, and curved for your lounging convenience. 

don’t like rectangles or square? Okay. Have a fucking trapezoid seat.