Major Hellenic Deities:

How to make your own spiked choker

You will need: aluminum can scissors sharpie or any marker really some kind of strong fabric like jeans (you can use part of a leg! Also, if it’s not the color you want, just paint it) button or zipper sewing stuff hot glue or superglue tweezers you can sacrifice Steps: measure your neck (make sure to add 1 or 2 cm so it’s not too tight), also have in mind how many and how big you want your spikes to be so that you can cut an appropriate height (words hard srry, gon add sm images later to make it easier to understand). After measuring everything, mark down on the fabric and cut 4 stripes (2 are for protecting your neck and 2 are to make sure the spikes stay in place). Now onto the spikes, get an aluminum can and cut off the bottom and top, then cut open the can so that you end up with a metal sheet (oh! You will need to find a way to make the sheet straight, since when you cut open the can, it will be curled up). Go on google and search for cone molds, also you will need to add 3 triangles at the base of the cone mold, now trace onto paper and cut (also test the molds with the paper to see if they look the way you want them to look like. Put the mold over the metal sheet and trace it and cut the sheet. Roll the spikes and glue them, use the tweezers to hold everything into place while glue dries, that way you won’t glue your fingers. Repeat these for all spikes. Get the fabric strips from earlier, now we are going to assemble it all together. With 2 strips, mark where the spikes are going, the first one by doing 3 dots like a triangle, then make holes so that you can put the spike’s triangles trough, and fold the ends. Now the second strip, mark where the spikes are and cut an x shaped hole, put this strip over the one with the spikes. Now get all the strips and sew them together, after that you can choose whatever way to close it, with a button, by tying with a string, zipper, idk whatever feels better ig.

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White-Bear-King

Valemon

Part 2

Book by Peter Christen Asbjørnsen

illustrated by Svein Solem

“Good day,” said the king’s daughter.

“Have you seen anything of White-Bear-King Valemon?” she asked.

“Were you to have had him, maybe?” said the old woman. That it was. «Why, yes, he rushed by here yesterday, but he went so fast that you won’t catch up with him,” she said.

The little girl was playing about on the floor with a flask, which was such that it poured out whatever they wanted, and wherever the flask was, drink was never lacking.

“But this poor woman, who has to journey so far and on such rough roads, she’ll be thirsty and suffer many other hardships,” said the little girl, and then she asked if she could give her the flask. Why, yes that she could.

So the king’s daughter got the flask, said her thanks, and set out again, walking through the same forest, all that day and night.

On the third morning she came to a cottage, and there were an old woman and a little girl.

“Good day,” said the king’s daughter.

“Have you seen anything of White-Bear-King Valemon?” she asked.

“Were you to have had him, maybe?” said the old woman. That it was. «Why, yes, he rushed by here yesterday, but he went so fast that you won’t catch up with him,” she said.

The little girl was playing on the floor with a cloth that was such that whenever they said to it, “Cloth, spread thyself, and deck thyself with every good dish!” it did so. And wherever the cloth was, good food was never Lacking.

“But this poor old woman, who had to journey so far and on such rough roads, said the little girl,” she may well both starve and suffer many other hardships, so she’ll have more need of this cloth than I,” she said, and then she asked if she could give her the cloth. That she could.

So the king’s daughter took her cloth and said her thanks, and set off. Far, farther than far, through the forest all that day and night she went. In the morning she came to a mountain spur which was as steep as a wall, and so high and so wide that so end could she see. There was a cottage there too, and, when she came in, the first thing she said was:

“Good day, have you seen whether White-Bear-King Valemon has traveled this way?”

“Were you to have had him, maybe?” said the old woman. That it was. “Yes, he rushed by here yesterday, but he went so fast that you won’t catch up with him,” she said.

The cottage was full of little children, and they all clung to their mother’s apron strings and cried for food. The old woman put a kettle full of pebbles on the fire. The king’s daughter asked what was the good of that. They were so poor said the old woman that they could afford neither food nor clothes, and it was so hard to hear the children crying for a bit to eat. But when she put the kettle on the fire, and said,” Now the apples will soon be done,” it seemed to deaden their hunger, and they were patient for a while. It wasn’t long before the king’s daughter got out the cloth and the flask, as you can imagine, and when the children were fed and happy, she clipped out clothing for them with the golden scissors.

“Well, said the old woman of the house, “since you’ve been so heartily kind to me and my children, it would be a shame not to do what we can do to try to help you up the mountain. My husband is really a master smith. Now you just rest until he comes back, and I’ll get him to forge claws for your hands and feet, and then you can try to crawl up”.

When the smith came, he started on the claws right away, and the next morning they were ready. She had no time to wait, but said her thanks, fastened the claws on her hands and crept and crawled up the mountainside the whole day and night, and, just when she was so tired that she didn’t think she could lift her hand again, but felt she would sink to the ground, she got to the top. There was a plain, with fields and meadows so big and wide that she had never imagined anything so broad and so smooth, and close by there was a castle filled with workers of every kind who toiled like ants in an anthill.

“What is going on here?” asked the king’s daughter.

Well, this was where she lived, the Troll-hag, who had bewitched White-Bear-King Valemon and in three days she was to wed him. The king’s daughter asked if she could talk with her. No, not likely! That was out-and-out impossible. So she sat down outside the window, and started clipping with the golden scissors, and velvet and silken clothing flew about like a snowflurry. When the Troll-hag caught sight of that, she wanted to buy the scissors.

“For no matter how the tailors toil, it’s no use,” she said. “There are too many to be clothed.”

The scissors weren’t for sale, said the king’s daughter. But the Troll-hag could have them, if she would let her sleep with her sweetheart tonight. She could certainly do that, said the Troll-hag, but she would lull him to sleep herself, and wake her up herself. When he had gone to bed, she gave him a sleeping potion, so he was in no condition to wake up, for all the king’s daughter shouted and cried.

The next day the king’s daughter went outside the windows again, sat down and started pouring from the flask; it flowed like a brook, both beer and wine, and it never ran dry. When the Troll-hag laid eyes on that, she wanted to buy it.

“For no matter how much they toil at the brewing and distilling, it’s no use. There are too many to drink,” she said.

It wasn’t for sale for money, said the king’s daughter, but if she would let her sleep with her sweetheart tonight, she would give it to her. Yes, that she could certainly do, said the Troll-hag, but she would lull him to sleep herself, and wake him up herself. When he had gone to bed, she gave him a sleeping potion again, so the King’s daughter had no better luck that night either. He couldn’t be awakened, for all she cried and shouted. But that night one of the artisans was working in the room next door. He heard her cry in there, and he guessed what had really happened, and the next day he told the prince that she must have come, the king’s daughter who was to have freed him.

The next day was just like the others – with the cloth as with the scissors and the flask. When it was dinner time, the king’s daughter went outside the castle, pulled out the cloth, and said,” Cloth, spread thyself and deck thyself with every good dish!” Then there was enough food for a hundred men, but the king’s daughter sat down alone. When the Troll-hag caught sight of the cloth, she wanted to buy it.

“For no matter how much they cock and bake, it’s no use. There are too many mouths to feed,” she said.

It wasn’t for sale for money, said the king’s daughter, but if she would let her sleep with her sweetheart tonight, she could have it. She could certainly do that, said the Troll-hag, but she would lull him to sleep herself, and wake him up herself. When he had gone to bed, she came with a sleeping potion, but this time he was on his guard, and fooled her. The Troll-hag didn’t trust him any more than just so far, she didn’t, for she took a darning needle and stuck it right through his arm, to see if he were sleeping soundly enough. But no matter how much it hurt, he didn’t move, and then the king’s daughter was allowed to come in to him.

Now this was all very well, but they must get rid of the Troll-hag before he would be free. So he got the carpenters to make a trap door on the bridge which the bridal procession was to cross, for it was the custom there that the bride should ride first in the procession. When the Troll-hag started across the bridge with all her Troll-hag bridesmaids, the planks under them dropped open and they fell through. Then King Valemon and the the king’s daughter and all the wedding guests rushed back to the castle, and took as much of the Troll-hag’s gold and money as they could carry, and then rushed off to his country to hold the real wedding. But on the way, King Valemon stopped in and fetched the three little girls, and now she found out why he had taken the children from her, it was so that they could help her find him. The end.

ah so it looks like nina are maggie are gonna be the parallel that’s so painfully obvious that it forces aziraphale and crowley to confront their own- MY GOD IT’S BEELZEBUB AND GABRIEL WITH A STEEL CHAIR

Gay home thots.....

So… is there a sexuality for being in love with the moon? An after school club?? A cult??? Seriously, just tell me I’m not the only one who wants to marry this wonderfully weird rock in the sky.

Abled Person: Hey man, can you hold this wad of $2,000 and this one penny for me while I open my wallet?

Disabled Person: YOU COMPLETE AND UTTER FOOL!

The United States Government:

(Watch how many people don’t get this.)

Rabbits Rabbits Rabbits

Reblog this on the first of the month for good luck all month long!

🍂🍂🍂🍂My first time making pie! 🍂🍂🍂🍂

🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧🥧