After Years Of Living In The Adulting World, I Think I’ve Come To A Realization: Manners Exist To Guide

After years of living in the adulting world, I think I’ve come to a realization: Manners exist to guide you to good conduct even when you’re in a bad mood.

When you’re happy, when you’re feeling generous, when you’re pleased with your gift or your service or your outcome, it’s easy to be nice. It’s easy to tip the waiter well when you’ve had a good day. It’s easy to thank the teller or the clerk when you got what you wanted out of the transaction. It’s easy to smile and chit-chat with strangers on the road when you’re in a good mood.

It’s hard to tip the waiter when you didn’t enjoy your food. It’s hard to thank the clerk for their time when you’ve just been told there’s a problem with their account and they weren’t able to fix it for you. It’s hard to think of something nice to say when your aunt gave you a crappy sweater you neither need nor want. It’s hard to be nice to people when you’ve had a shitty day. It’s HARD.

That’s what manners are for. Scripts and phrases that you learn by rote to say when you can’t think of a single nice or good thing to say from your own volition. Yes, they’re scripted. Yes, the sentiment is empty. But the scripts work in every situation, and the emptiness provides a buffer between your own unhappiness and the rest of society.

Because most of the time, it’s not the waiter’s fault that the food you ordered wasn’t what you expected. It’s not the clerk’s fault that your account is overdrawn. It’s not the fault of the barista or the stranger on the subway that you got fired today or your favorite aunt died. But even when you can’t summon a smile or a cheery word, you can still have manners, because they will serve you the same in sunshine or rain.

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4 months ago

what do you mean elon musk did a nazi salute on live tv at the united states presidential inauguration twice and is now erasing the evidence off the internet by replacing the footage with the crowd cheering instead?

would be a shame if people reblogged this, wouldn’t it?

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3 months ago

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1 month ago

lotr au where everything is the same except they have phones so for half of the journey legolas is getting spam calls from thranduil asking where tf he is

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4 months ago

Fuck this

Fuck you

Unwerewolfs your apocalypse.

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4 months ago

fun thing about herding and/or generally neurotic breeds: they are really good at following rules you have instituted, but they will also make their own Dog Rules they will follow stringently whether or not you like it

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godtookmygenderagain

1 month ago

Merry, to Frodo, lying face-down on bed, regretting being alive: And then I called him dad.

Boromir, to Aragorn, sobbing: And then he called me dad.

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godtookmygenderagain

2 months ago

The King Under the Mountain

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godtookmygenderagain

3 months ago

"You're the only one I have left..."

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2 months ago

Door at Alnwick Garden, Northumberland.

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godtookmygenderagain

3 months ago

From the people who brought you Squid Facts, Horseshoe Crab is Calling

A business card sized piece of paper looks like an iPhone. It looks like the screen where someone is calling. A horseshoe crab is on the line for you.

This is stuck in a street pole

I don't know about you, but I need a little joy right now. Earlier this month, I was walking down the street in my neighborhood and I came upon this:

A business card sized piece of paper looks like an iPhone. It looks like the screen where someone is calling.Jesus is on the line for you.

This is stuck in a street pole

I was like "Wow. Ok. Yes I AM picking that up." I couldn't resist! What an enticing strategy!

I had to try it myself.

After kicking the idea around with a few friends, I landed on "Horseshoe Crab is calling", and we updated to the modern iOS. Maybe i should have kept the green and red, I'm not sure.

Who the hell wouldn't be intrigued by this?!

(P.S. shout out to Basic Barbie, another street artist in the city who is unapologetically femme in a predominantly male scene. We love Basic Barbie.)