Greatbeholderbrooke - Great Beholder Zolob

My boyfriend is trying to explain cricket to me again. “He’s only got two balls to make 48 runs”, he says. The camera focuses on a man. Underneath him it says LEFT ARM FAST MEDIUM. A ball flies into the stands and presumably fractures someone’s skull. “There’s a free six”, my boyfriend says. 348 SIXES says the screen. A child in the audience waves a sign referencing Weet-Bix

Pater Hoyt: Let me tell you this tragic story of the slow death of my church, the desperation of believers to save it, the most terrifying trees, the dismissiveness of science for "unimportant" subjects, and a concept of immortality so gruesome it makes priests question the existence of god.

Sol Weintraub: Let me tell you about the slow death of my only child, about time and inevidability and being a parent, about having to witness your daughter wake up confused and frightened every single day and my powerlessness to help her. Let me tell you about the Binding of Isaac and a nonbeliever's struggle with god.

The Consul: Let me tell you about the doomed rebellion of a beautiful world and the death of it's ecosystem. About how interstellar travel and relative time separate people. About my lifelong struggle to fight my grandmother's fight to the detriment of my own person to the point where I do not even have a name.

Martin Silenus: Let me tell you about my incredibly long life and all the stuff I've lost, including earth itself and my ability to speak. How I became unfathomably wealthy writing shitty pulp fiction. About art and the process of creation in such a profound way that you'll forget you hated me.

Brawne Lamia: Let me tell you about our Robot Kings and how humanity is unable to stop whatever they are doing. About how everything you have been told about our history might be a lie. About corruption and murder in the highest office of our government. And about the cute twink I met, fell in love with, got pregnant from and then lost.

Het Masteen did not live to tell his story.

Fedmahn Kassad: Let me tell you about my incredibly hot secret girlfriend and about all the sex we had in detail!

All eyes on you

i hauve a cold

i think the near-extinction of people making fun, deep and/or unique interactive text-based browser games, projects and stories is catastrophic to the internet. i'm talking pre-itch.io era, nothing against it.

there are a lot of fun ones listed here and here but for the most part, they were made years ago and are now a dying breed. i get why. there's no money in it. factoring in the cost of web hosting and servers, it probably costs money. it's just sad that it's a dying art form.

anyway, here's some of my favorite browser-based interactive projects and games, if you're into that kind of thing. 90% of them are on the lists that i linked above.

A Better World - create an alternate history timeline

Alter Ego - abandonware birth-to-death life simulator game

Seedship - text-based game about colonizing a new planet

Sandboxels or ThisIsSand - free-falling sand physics games

Little Alchemy 2 - combine various elements to make new ones

Infinite Craft - kind of the same as Little Alchemy

ZenGM - simulate sports

Tamajoji - browser-based tamagotchi

IFDB - interactive fiction database (text adventure games)

Written Realms - more text adventure games with a user interface

The Cafe & Diner - mystery game

The New Campaign Trail - US presidential campaign game

Money Simulator - simulate financial decisions

Genesis - text-based adventure/fantasy game

Level 13 - text-based science fiction adventure game

Miniconomy - player driven economy game

Checkbox Olympics - games involving clicking checkboxes

BrantSteele.net - game show and Hunger Games simulators

Murder Games - fight to the death simulator by Orteil

Cookie Clicker - different but felt weird not including it. by Orteil.

if you're ever thinking about making a niche project that only a select number of individuals will be nerdy enough to enjoy, keep in mind i've been playing some of these games off and on for 20~ years (Alter Ego, for example). quite literally a lifetime of replayability.

[image id: a four-page comic. it is titled “do not stand at my grave and weep” after the poem by mary elizabeth frye. the first page shows paleontologists digging up fossils at a dig. it reads, “do not stand at my grave and weep. i am not there. i do not sleep.” page two features several prehistoric creatures living in the wild. not featured but notable, each have modern descendants: horses, cetaceans, horsetail plants, and crocodilians. it reads, “i am a thousand winds that blow. i am the diamond glints on snow. i am the sunlight on ripened grain. i am the gentle autumn rain.” the third page shows archaeopteryx in the treetops and the skies, then a modern museum-goer reading the placard on a fossil display. it reads, “when you awaken in the morning’s hush, i am the swift uplifting rush, of quiet birds in circled flight. i am the soft stars that shine at night. do not stand at my grave and cry.” the fourth page shows a chicken in a field. it reads, “i am not there. i did not die” / end id]

a comic i made in about 15 hours for my school’s comic anthology. the theme was “evolution”

you've been waiting a while for a new maths update - and it's finally here!

improvements include:

in gender selection screen, added "sumtraction" option

fixed bug where positive divergent sums evaluated to negative numbers

added new 2-dimensional version of off-by-1 errors - off-by-[1,1]

changed the discrete maths server to a PvP zone (note: computer science is still PvNP)

the category theory DLC is now (co)free!

to prevent confusion with function graphs, all voiced lines pronounce "graph theory" with a soft g

fixed "vacuously true" glitch

integrals can now disobey fundamental theorem of calculus when unhappy. they become happy again if fed logarithmic functions

hyperbolic geometry no longer exaggerates as a rhetorical device (note: spherical geometry left the same as before)

rebalanced primes so that 4k+1's and 4k+3's alternate in Thue-Morse pattern. added an uncomputable 4k+2 prime

hot combinatorial games now distribute their temperature according to the laws of thermodynamics; cold games are now superconductive

added demo of "finitist hardcore" gamemode. as of now only two levels are available

subtraction is now associative

recursion is now recursive

added a nontrivial linear, associative, commutative binary operation on the positive reals, over which addition is distributive

exponentiated liner logic, so that additive logic is multiplicative and multiplicative logic is exponential

fixed "negative probability" glitch

redesigned the Tits Building and the Cox-Zucker Machine

fixed trigonometry

increased hitboxes for infinitesimals

added lootboxes

Just started differential geometry, I'm starting to understand the appeal