Greywritesthings - Grey

My new migraine meds make me so freakin tired and have a list of side effects as long as my armso content may be slow

next person to spam like my fics without a single comment is getting a dm from me with the following:

DID YOU LIKE IT?

WHY DID YOU LIKE IT????

OR DID YOU HATE IT AND GAVE IT A LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME LATER?????

DO YOU HATE ME??????????

Agent

Steve Rogers x reader

Angst -> smut -> fluff

Warnings - fighting, guns, Breif mention of R being ex hydra, panic attack, Steve being cold to reader, reader getting into shit, PinV sex, fingering that’s it I think? Written in my notes app

Masterlist

Since you had moved into the tower Steve had seemed pissed off with you. Cold hard stares, conversations only when nessesary, half the time he wouldnt even take you opinion on the movie for movie night. Just generally keeping you at arms length.

You tried your best still, working hard to earn his trust and respect but nothing seemed to matter. You made friends with the others, including Bucky, you cooked with Wanda, watched movies with Bucky, trained with Nat, you even cooped up with Clint in the vents sometimes with Thors poptarts but steve was a whole different ballpark.

Natasha was down after a solo mission went awry, leaving her out of training for a few days, that was when you got the text

"Training room in an hour. - SR"

You thought you were going to be training with Clint, Tony or even Parker, you didnt think Steve would volunteer himself to train with you, especially given the last mission.

Flashback

You knew the mission was going to go either way, Steve wanted it to be a stealthy in and out but bucky was hell bent on the fact that you would get caught in a fire fight and given he knew the hydra base you were all dropping into you were inclinded to trust his judgement, and that caused even more friction between you and steve.

It was the middle of the well predicted fight that steve seemed to really get pissed off. You were on the otherside of the base, backed into a corner and not responding to comms, to focused on keeping yourself alive. Steve was yelling down your earpeice trying to get a response, bucky silently making his way over to you. You were by no means helpless in battle but an eight vs one put the odds against you.

You were in the middle of trying to climb out of the hole in the roof you had made when steve grabs your hand, you let him pull you up, firing final shots as he does, taking the last few agents down as you are pulled to your feet.

Once your on your feet and check that no other agents are around you you look up at steve, meeting his eye and seeing what you took as pure anger.

"What the hell were you thinking Agent!" He nearly yells at you, the title grating you. Steve made a point never to use your name, allways using Agent instead and it pissed you off.

"Trying to save my ass is what! I didnt intentionally corner myself into a one verses eight now did i!?" You yell back, frustrated, adrenaline lessening now the fight is over, leaving you with the rampant post fight anxiety.

Steve goes to respond when you feel a presence behind you and a hand on your shoulder, bucky, the man seemed to understand you without words. He gets steve to back off, you know hes argued with him over his treatment of you and you know it probably doesnt help your relationship with Steve but at times like these you were thankfull for the backup.

Your hands shake as your brain automatically counts the number of lives you may have taken, you never asked for confimed kills, trying your best to avoid killing when you could. You took enough lives as a hydra assasin.

"Cmon doll, back to the jet, Punk your driving" bucky says quietly, metal arm wrapping around your shoulder to ground you.

Once you were back on the jet you settled in the corner as best you could, knee bouncing, hand scratching at your arm at your eyes fixate on the wall. You cant hear anything, you could barley controll your breathing, on the brink of hyperventilating when a voice started talking to you, a hand on your shoulder that you assumed was bucky.

The voice talked you down through your panic attack, the memorys running through your head of hydra and the lives you took. The voice remained steady, the hand never leaving untill your breathing evened out and your knee stopped bouncing, then it left, unusual for bucky but you had assumed he had to help steve fly the jet.

End of flashback

You get changed and finish your hair so it wont get in the way of training and head down to the training rooms where you see Steve already is, along with Bucky in the corner.

"Hey Bucky! Captain" you greet as they both turn towards the sound of the doors opening and Steve motions you to the mat for sparring.

The first round between you goes well you thought, Steve had won out overall but you had put up a good fight, till he started critiquing you on every little misstep.

"Agent you really need to step it up, in position" He said as he readied himself again for the second round.

The second round goes much the same but you are sharper with your movements, more concentrated, till you here Bucky say somthing off to the side that breaks it for a fraction of a second and you dont see Steves foot coming for your ribs, doging too late and falling back with a gasp.

"Agent I said do better!" He barks at you already standing in position on the otherside of the mat as you stagger onto your feet, winded but overall fine.

"Sorry captain." You say through gritted teeth, aiming to win.

This time as steve expects you to hit high you fein asif your going to sweep your leg out to knock his from under him, as he ducks to block you jump up, wraping your legs around his head, pulling him forwards and over you, landing on his chest. You grapple with him, fighting for a hold on his wrists.

You notice he doesnt seem to be putting up a whole lot of fight but choose to ignore it, grabbing his wrists and pinning his hips down so he cant shift you off of him.

You hear the door close to the side of you and ignore it, focusing on Steve. You look him in the eye and for once you dont recognise the look in them. Your used to a cold hard stare thats masking anything underneath, this is somthing you havent seen.

His pupils are blown, blush covering his face, mouth slightly open as he breaths hard. "Well done Agent" he murmers, face so close to yours now.

The tension crackles in the air, the man you thought hated you, the same man you have had a growing crush on for a while now despite everything, the same man bucky had heard all about your growing feelings for, was now pinned underneath you, and if you had moved an inch you would have been able to feel his growing hard on underneath you.

"Wish you would stop calling me that, Captain" you murmer, keeping eye contact, sure that your expression is doing about the same as his right now.

Thats when he takes you by suprise, pulling his wrists free, grabbing your waist and rolling you under him as you gasp in suprise. "What would you rather, Sugar?" He leans in close to your ear as you blush even worse now, gasping softly.

Steve then moves faster than you can keep track in the haze your in, one second your pinned underneath him, the next your in his arms and being walked out if the gym towards his room.

"You drive me nuts you know? you allways have" he says as he gets to his room, pinning you against the door.

"Thought you hated me" you respond quietly, feeling him fully pressed against you, leaning your head down, shy now.

He places a hand under your chin, forcing your head to tilt up and you to make eye contact with him, "I didn't hate you, I just, I didn't know how to act with my feelings, I wanted to protect you so i kept you at arms length" he murmers, lips centimeters away from yours.

"Dont have to anymore Steve" you say, tilting your head to the side slightly, voice soft, almost begging for him to come closer.

And he does.

He finally connects your lips in a soft kiss, lips moving slowly against yours, one hand grabbing your ass tightly as the others thumb moves slowly against your jaw as your arms wrap across his shoulders.

Eventually you both have to pull away for air, forheads leaning on eachother as you catch your breath, just staring at eachother for a moment.

"You have no idea how long iv wanted that sugar, you okay?" He says, voice husky as he moves you off of the door and towards the bed, as you nod he drops you onto the bed, following after you as you move back upto the headboard.

You pull him down against you, hands tangling into his hair as you pull him in for another kiss, this time full of heat and need, you both let out you own moans as the kiss gets deeper, steve taking the opportunity to slip his tounge into your mouth, as his hips softly rut down against you.

Steve eventually pulls away murmering a soft "fuck" as you let out a whimper, his mouth trails down your neck, leaving kisses and hickeys as he went, still rutting his length down against you as his hands started to explore over your shirt. Eventually he reached the hem and tentatively reached underneath, when you didnt he reached further, pulling your shirt up, eventually up and over your head, quickly reaching behind your back and undoing your bra.

His mouth moved down too your breast, mouth covering one nipple while his hand pinched and twisted the other, making you moan and arch of the bed "Fuck baby please"you whine quietly as he lets out a low laugh.

"I know sugar I know" he says pulling away, quickly yanking his shirt over his head. "Strip for me honey" the words are soft but it sounds like an order.

You quickly pull off your remaining clothes and settle back down against the bed as you watch him strip down, paying particular interest to his leaking length that was now visible to you.

He climbs back onto you and leans into another heated kiss, pushing his way into his mouth, trailing his hand down to where you needed him most, fingers so close to where you needed him.

"Please baby please" you beg softly urging him on as his lips move to your neck, leaving more hickeys as he went. He finally moved he fingers to where you needed him, teasing you before pushing one inside making you let out a whine.

"Good girl, gotta get you ready for me yeah" he says as he pumps his finger in and out of you as your hips jerk up

He continues pumping and then adds a second finger as you pull at his hair, moaning softly as he talks you through it.

"Such a good girl f'me hm? My girl, Was so mean to you but dont worry Im going to make it up to you dont worry honey" He says as he adds a third finger, circling his thumb around your clit as you whine loudly, hands scratching up his back and into his hair, tugging as you feel yourself get closer to the edge.

"Please baby please fuck oh my god" you bable inbetween moans, so close to the edge just needing a little bit more

Thats when Steve curls his fingers just so, hitting that spongey spot inside you that makes your toes curl and your vision white as steve sucks on your tits once again as you cum on his fingers with a loud moan.

"Good girl, thats my good girl, my good little slut for me hm?" Steve says into the crook of your neck as he slows down, letting you ride it out, pulling out slowly, repositioning himself inbetween your legs do his length was nearly poking at your enterance.

"Please stevie, need you, need you baby" you start to whine when steve sheaths himself inside you fully before you can finish your begging leaving you breathless.

Steve gives you time to adjust to him inside you before starting to move, letting out a low groan and burying his head into your neck, biting down as you pull on his hair. He knows hes not going to last with the way you feel around him and you know you arent going to either.

"Fuck baby you feel so good, im not going to last long, such a good girl sugar, so tight" steve rambled on, talking you through it as he picked up his thrusts, hitting that perfect spot inside you bringing you closer to the edge.

As he nipped at your neck he reached down to your clit and rubbed small figure eights against it "you going to cum for me baby? Yeah you going to cum for me huh? Cmon baby cum for me wana feel you" he encouraged applying just a little more pressure as you tightened around him, cumming around him with a cry, leaving scratch marks up his back as you feel him cum inside you with a low groan as you come down, hot ropes of his cum hitting your insides.

You both lay there for a while in the quiet, both still breathing heavy as you recover before steve moves to pull out causing you to whine.

"Cmere you" he says with a small chuckle as he pulls out and rolls over, laying on the bed and pulling you ontop of him, reaching for the duvet to cover you both.

"I am sorry for being cruel to you sugar" steve says into the quiet

"You werent cruel, cold sure but not cruel but its okay, what would be cruel is not letting me sleep" you mumble into his neck, biting him a little.

He laughs a little "okay okay, you can sleep" he finishes as he pulls you closer, closing his eyes and letting the warmth of you lull him into sleep.

Since you had moved into the tower Steve had seemed pissed off with you. Cold hard stares, conversations only when nessesary, half the time he wouldnt even take you opinion on the movie for movie night. Just generally keeping you at arms length.

You tried your best still, working hard to earn his trust and respect but nothing seemed to matter. You made friends with the others, including Bucky, you cooked with Wanda, watched movies with Bucky, trained with Nat, you even cooped up with Clint in the vents sometimes with Thors poptarts but steve was a whole different ballpark.

Natasha was down after a solo mission went awry, leaving her out of training for a few days, that was when you got the text

"Training room in an hour. - SR"

You thought you were going to be training with Clint, Tony or even Parker, you didnt think Steve would volunteer himself to train with you, especially given the last mission.

Flashback?

You knew the mission was going to go either way, Steve wanted it to be a stealthy in and out but bucky was hell bent on the fact that you would get caught in a fire fight and given he knew the hydra base you were all dropping into you were inclinded to trust his judgement, and that caused even more friction between you and steve.

It was the middle of the well predicted fight that steve seemed to really get pissed off. You were on the otherside of the base, backed into a corner and not responding to comms, to focused on keeping yourself alive. Steve was yelling down your earpeice trying to get a response, bucky silently making his way over to you. You were by no means helpless in battle but an eight vs one put the odds against you.

You were in the middle of trying to climb out of the hole in the roof you had made when steve grabs your hand, you let him pull you up, firing final shots as he does, taking the last few agents down as you are pulled to your feet.

Once your on your feet and check that no other agents are around you you look up at steve, meeting his eye and seeing what you took as pure anger.

"What the hell were you thinking Agent!" He nearly yells at you, the title grating you. Steve made a point never to use your name, allways using Agent instead and it pissed you off.

"Trying to save my ass is what! I didnt intentionally corner myself into a one verses eight now did i!?" You yell back, frustrated, adrenaline lessening now the fight is over, leaving you with the rampant post fight anxiety.

Steve goes to respond when you feel a presence behind you and a hand on your shoulder, bucky, the man seemed to understand you without words. He gets steve to back off, you know hes argued with him over his treatment of you and you know it probably doesnt help your relationship with Steve but at times like these you were thankfull for the backup.

Your hands shake as your brain automatically counts the number of lives you may have taken, you never asked for confimed kills, trying your best to avoid killing when you could. You took enough lives as a hydra assasin.

"Cmon doll, back to the jet, Punk your driving" bucky says quietly, metal arm wrapping around your shoulder to ground you.

Once you were back on the jet you settled in the corner as best you could, knee bouncing, hand scratching at your arm at your eyes fixate on the wall. You cant hear anything, you could barley controll your breathing, on the brink of hyperventilating when a voice started talking to you, a hand on your shoulder that you assumed was bucky.

The voice talked you down through your panic attack, the memorys running through your head of hydra and the lives you took. The voice remained steady, the hand never leaving untill your breathing evened out and your knee stopped bouncing, then it left, unusual for bucky but you had assumed he had to help steve fly the jet.

End of flashback

You get changed and finish your hair so it wont get in the way of training and head down to the training rooms where you see Steve already is, along with Bucky in the corner.

"Hey Bucky! Captain" you greet as they both turn towards the sound of the doors opening and Steve motions you to the mat for sparring.

The first round between you goes well you thought, Steve had won out overall but you had put up a good fight, till he started critiquing you on every little misstep.

"Agent you really need to step it up, in position" He said as he readied himself again for the second round.

The second round goes much the same but you are sharper with your movements, more concentrated, till you here Bucky say somthing off to the side that breaks it for a fraction of a second and you dont see Steves foot coming for your ribs, doging too late and falling back with a gasp.

"Agent I said do better!" He barks at you already standing in position on the otherside of the mat as you stagger onto your feet, winded but overall fine.

"Sorry captain." You say through gritted teeth, aiming to win.

This time as steve expects you to hit high you fein asif your going to sweep your leg out to knock his from under him, as he ducks to block you jump up, wraping your legs around his head, pulling him forwards and over you, landing on his chest. You grapple with him, fighting for a hold on his wrists.

You notice he doesnt seem to be putting up a whole lot of fight but choose to ignore it, grabbing his wrists and pinning his hips down so he cant shift you off of him.

You hear the door close to the side of you and ignore it, focusing on Steve. You look him in the eye and for once you dont recognise the look in them. Your used to a cold hard stare thats masking anything underneath, this is somthing you havent seen.

His pupils are blown, blush covering his face, mouth slightly open as he breaths hard. "Well done Agent" he murmers, face so close to yours now.

The tension crackles in the air, the man you thought hated you, the same man you have had a growing crush on for a while now despite everything, the same man bucky had heard all about your growing feelings for, was now pinned underneath you, and if you had moved an inch you would have been able to feel his growing hard on underneath you.

"Wish you would stop calling me that, Captain" you murmer, keeping eye contact, sure that your expression is doing about the same as his right now.

Thats when he takes you by suprise, pulling his wrists free, grabbing your waist and rolling you under him as you gasp in suprise. "What would you rather, Sugar?" He leans in close to your ear as you blush even worse now, gasping softly.

Steve then moves faster than you can keep track in the haze your in, one second your pinned underneath him, the next your in his arms and being walked out if the gym towards his room.

"You drive me nuts you know? you allways have" he says as he gets to his room, pinning you against the door.

"Thought you hated me" you respond quietly, feeling him fully pressed against you, leaning your head down, shy now.

He places a hand under your chin, forcing your head to tilt up and you to make eye contact with him, "I didn't hate you, I just, I didn't know how to act with my feelings, I wanted to protect you so i kept you at arms length" he murmers, lips centimeters away from yours.

"Dont have to anymore Steve" you say, tilting your head to the side slightly, voice soft, almost begging for him to come closer.

And he does.

He finally connects your lips in a soft kiss, lips moving slowly against yours, one hand grabbing your ass tightly as the others thumb moves slowly against your jaw as your arms wrap across his shoulders.

Eventually you both have to pull away for air, forheads leaning on eachother as you catch your breath, just staring at eachother for a moment.

"You have no idea how long iv wanted that sugar, you okay?" He says, voice husky as he moves you off of the door and towards the bed, as you nod he drops you onto the bed, following after you as you move back upto the headboard.

You pull him down against you, hands tangling into his hair as you pull him in for another kiss, this time full of heat and need, you both let out you own moans as the kiss gets deeper, steve taking the opportunity to slip his tounge into your mouth, as his hips softly rut down against you.

Steve eventually pulls away murmering a soft "fuck" as you let out a whimper, his mouth trails down your neck, leaving kisses and hickeys as he went, still rutting his length down against you as his hands started to explore over your shirt. Eventually he reached the hem and tentatively reached underneath, when you didnt he reached further, pulling your shirt up, eventually up and over your head, quickly reaching behind your back and undoing your bra.

His mouth moved down too your breast, mouth covering one nipple while his hand pinched and twisted the other, making you moan and arch of the bed "Fuck baby please"you whine quietly as he lets out a low laugh.

"I know sugar I know" he says pulling away, quickly yanking his shirt over his head. "Strip for me honey" the words are soft but it sounds like an order.

You quickly pull off your remaining clothes and settle back down against the bed as you watch him strip down, paying particular interest to his leaking length that was now visible to you.

He climbs back onto you and leans into another heated kiss, pushing his way into his mouth, trailing his hand down to where you needed him most, fingers so close to where you needed him.

"Please baby please" you beg softly urging him on as his lips move to your neck, leaving more hickeys as he went. He finally moved he fingers to where you needed him, teasing you before pushing one inside making you let out a whine.

"Good girl, gotta get you ready for me yeah" he says as he pumps his finger in and out of you as your hips jerk up

He continues pumping and then adds a second finger as you pull at his hair, moaning softly as he talks you through it.

"Such a good girl f'me hm? My girl, Was so mean to you but dont worry Im going to make it up to you dont worry honey" He says as he adds a third finger, circling his thumb around your clit as you whine loudly, hands scratching up his back and into his hair, tugging as you feel yourself get closer to the edge.

"Please baby please fuck oh my god" you bable inbetween moans, so close to the edge just needing a little bit more

Thats when Steve curls his fingers just so, hitting that spongey spot inside you that makes your toes curl and your vision white as steve sucks on your tits once again as you cum on his fingers with a loud moan.

"Good girl, thats my good girl, my good little slut for me hm?" Steve says into the crook of your neck as he slows down, letting you ride it out, pulling out slowly, repositioning himself inbetween your legs do his length was nearly poking at your enterance.

"Please stevie, need you, need you baby" you start to whine when steve sheaths himself inside you fully before you can finish your begging leaving you breathless.

Steve gives you time to adjust to him inside you before starting to move, letting out a low groan and burying his head into your neck, biting down as you pull on his hair. He knows hes not going to last with the way you feel around him and you know you arent going to either.

"Fuck baby you feel so good, im not going to last long, such a good girl sugar, so tight" steve rambled on, talking you through it as he picked up his thrusts, hitting that perfect spot inside you bringing you closer to the edge.

As he nipped at your neck he reached down to your clit and rubbed small figure eights against it "you going to cum for me baby? Yeah you going to cum for me huh? Cmon baby cum for me wana feel you" he encouraged applying just a little more pressure as you tightened around him, cumming around him with a cry, leaving scratch marks up his back as you feel him cum inside you with a low groan as you come down, hot ropes of his cum hitting your insides.

You both lay there for a while in the quiet, both still breathing heavy as you recover before steve moves to pull out causing you to whine.

"Cmere you" he says with a small chuckle as he pulls out and rolls over, laying on the bed and pulling you ontop of him, reaching for the duvet to cover you both.

"I am sorry for being cruel to you sugar" steve says into the quiet

"You werent cruel, cold sure but not cruel but its okay, what would be cruel is not letting me sleep" you mumble into his neck, biting him a little.

He laughs a little "okay okay, you can sleep" he finishes as he pulls you closer, closing his eyes and letting the warmth of you lull him into sleep.

"Take this gun" "I don't believe in guns" "Trust me they are very real" is a conversation that gets me every damn time, its so tense but it just makes me giggle

I'm thinking of adding some non cm fandoms to my writing list

(There will be all eventually just going off who to do first, poly ships are accepted, no wincest!!)

+ gabriel has been added to the list

+ logan sargent has been added to the list

Spencer Reid being a silly guy

There is a severe LACK of sam x reader fics out here and this one is beautiful oh my gods

PLATONIC ➵ S. WILSON

Masterlist | Buy me a coffee

Summary: Bucky has no idea how two people who have known each other for two decades can be so blind to their feelings for one another. At first, it was somewhat comical, the two of you dancing around your obvious attraction for one another, but Bucky has grown tired of pretending that your relationship is strictly platonic.

Pairing: Sam Wilson x Reader

Warnings: FLUFF (some angst if you squint), mutual pining, mentions of Riley (CA:TWS), Bucky meddling in your relationship, mentions of the Blip, alcohol consumption, Reader and Sam being two oblivious idiots in love, no use of y/n

Word Count: 3.8k

Song Inspo: "Platonic" by Ryan Hurd

Author’s Note: So, I saw Brave New World in February and haven't been able to stop thinking about Sam Wilson since. The x Reader tag for my boy is absolutely lacking so I decided to write something for my cap. Hope you guys enjoy some good ole Sam Wilson fluff. Let me know what you guys think and if you have any Sam Wilson x Reader recs on tumblr. Please, I'm desperate.

“You know you could just ask him out, right?”

You choke down your beer, nearly spitting it out as Bucky speaks up beside you. The two of you have been quietly sitting shoulder-to-shoulder at the shitty, hole-in-the-wall Irish pub that Sam insists on frequenting whenever all three of you are in D.C. at the same time. The little tradition had started as a coping mechanism after the three of you were blipped back into existence. You remember Sam begging you to accompany him to O’Malley’s the first time. And you remember sitting between your best friend and Bucky Barnes — it looked almost comical, an ex-Hydra assassin, a former Air Force pilot, and the newly named Captain America drinking a beer together. At first, you thought that Sam had asked you to come as a way to get you out of your house after everything that happened, but as the three of you sat in uncomfortable silence together, you realized that Sam brought you as a buffer. In all the years you’ve known the charismatic Sam Wilson, you never met someone he couldn’t talk to.

And then you met James Buchanan Barnes. 

Unlike Sam, you quickly fell into a cordial friendship with Bucky once you broke the ice. He’s both headstrong and cocky but also observant and aloof. People who meet him in passing might comment on how quiet he is, but you know he’s incredibly opinionated — hell, you made the mistake of commenting about baseball during your trio’s second outing together and had to listen to the man complain about the Brooklyn Dodgers moving to LA for a good thirty minutes. But what really bonded you with Bucky was Sam. You know that when Bucky looks at Sam, he sees what Steve saw in him — the man that Captain America decided was worthy of his mantle. 

He reminds you of Riley in many ways, and that’s why Sam had a more challenging time getting on board with the three of you hanging out together at first. Because for so long, it was just you, Sam, and Riley. You met Sam at boot camp, and then you met Riley shortly after. The three of you ran pararescue missions together — Sam and Riley clad in Exo-7 flight suits while you manned the C-130, which, thanks to a big government contract with Stark Industries, integrated cloaking systems and environmental blending. Then, on a routine mission, Riley got shot out of the sky, and suddenly it was just you and Sam. Sam became a PTSD veteran counselor, you got a piloting job with SHIELD stationed in D.C. to stay close to him, and then the two of you became regulars at O’Malley’s due to its proximity to both of your apartments. A part of Sam was afraid that he was replacing Riley by inviting Bucky into the space you share with him, but he had made a promise to Steve before he’d gone back in time with the infinity stones. And slowly but surely, the two became close friends, bonding over shared military stories, their musical tastes, and their deep respect and adoration for you. 

“What the hell are you talking about?”

Bucky scoffs at your question before taking another swig of his beer. He knows you’re playing dumb — the two of you have been participating in this same song and dance for the better part of a year now. Two months into regularly drinking with Sam and Bucky at O’Malley’s, you drunkenly confessed to Bucky that you harbor feelings for your best friend. He pretended to be shocked, but he knew about your little secret after first meeting with you and Sam. Bucky may be a tad out of touch with new social norms — the man hasn’t participated in the dating scene since the 1940s — but the act of pining hasn’t changed over the decades that have passed. 

“We’re just going to pretend you haven’t been brooding all night after Sam got whisked away by those girls?”

You roll your eyes at Bucky’s question. The annoyance weaved into your expression doesn’t come from a place of malice but instead draws from your frustration at how well Bucky understands you. Sam will always be your best friend, but Bucky has become something like a brother to you over the past year — an empty role in your life since Riley passed away. And after all, Bucky is an older brother — a protector — at his core. He may have lost his little sister a lifetime ago, but the instincts were still there, buried deep down until you and Sam showed up in his life.

“Brooding is your thing, Buck.”

“Exactly. So, can you stop stepping on my shoes?”

A smile tugs at your lips as Bucky playfully nudges you with his elbow. You know he’s trying to lighten the mood, and his humor has made you feel a little lighter; however, there’s still a gnawing in the pit of your stomach as you watch one of the girls slowly slide their hand down Sam’s arm. Bucky follows your gaze and lets out a tired sigh.

“Seriously, kid. What’s stopping you from just asking him out?”

“He’s my best friend, Buck.”

Bucky arches a brow at your reasoning. You say it as if it’s the answer to all of your heartache — as if it’s a valid excuse to hold yourself back from happiness. He has no idea how two people who have known each other for two decades can be so blind to their feelings for one another. At first, it was somewhat comical, the two of you dancing around your obvious attraction for one another, but Bucky has grown tired of pretending that your relationship is strictly platonic. He’s been trying to intervene, but whenever you think about confessing your feelings to Sam, you immediately talk yourself out of it. And Sam isn’t any better. Bucky’s tried to talk some sense into him at least a dozen times, but he’s sure you don’t feel the same way about him.

“I could always set you up with one of my friends.”

“I’m fairly certain you only have two friends, and they’re currently at this bar, Buck.”

Bucky rolls his eyes as he finishes his beer. 

“Believe it or not, I do have a life outside of you and Sam.”

He places the empty bottle on the counter along with a five-dollar bill before layering his leather jacket over his long-sleeve t-shirt. It’s a mild spring day, but you know he doesn’t wear the extra layers for warmth. They’re worn for the same reason as his leather gloves — security that his shiny, metal arm is covered. Bucky spares Sam one last glance before turning his attention back to you. You’re nursing the beer in your hand, simply waiting for Sam to notice you again. He gently grabs your shoulder with his good hand, and Bucky’s heart breaks in his chest as you look up at him with sad eyes.

“Just think about it, okay?”

You nod at his question, and Bucky releases his hold before heading home for the night. With a sigh, you finish your lukewarm beer and order another while waiting patiently for your best friend. Sam Wilson has always been the life of the party — the man who shines like a ray of sunlight even on the darkest days. But the Captain America mantle came with a newfound attention that Sam seems to revel in. You, however, find yourself struggling with it — it had been just the two of you for so long, and now you feel like you’re sharing him with all of America. 

But little do you know that even now, with the entire bar vying for his attention, Sam feels drawn to you like some invisible string is pulling him back. His eyes scan the crowd at O’Malley’s until they find you. He gives you a bright, genuine smile — the kind that leaves you grinning from ear to ear. You watch as he excuses himself from the lively conversation and approaches you. He slides into the seat beside you, shoulder bumping against yours as he leans into your space to grab the beer in front of you. You shoot him a playful glare as he takes a drink out of your beer bottle, and he winks at you in response. He places the bottle back in front of you before speaking.

“Bucky already left?”

“You know the old man — has to be home before bedtime.”

Sam laughs while throwing an arm back across your chair. You don’t even think twice about the action; Sam’s done it at least a thousand times at this point.

“Are you ready to get out of here?”

You give him an eager nod, desperate to get some fresh air. Sam laughs at your reaction before paying both of your tabs. Like in the bar, you don’t think twice as Sam slings his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side as you walk down the streets of the nation’s capital. Not even as he walks up the five flights of stairs with you to your apartment, unlocking the door with the key you gave him ages ago. Not even as he moves through your apartment as if it were his, opening your fridge to grab two beers and rifling through your junk drawer to find the bottle opener he knows is in there. Not even as Sam falls asleep on your couch again after a night of talking for hours. You don’t think twice because this is how it’s always been between you and Sam — it’s always been comfortable, domestic. 

But, for some reason, tonight is different. As you sit on your kitchen counter, finishing your beer, Sam’s loud snores from your living room are drowned out by Bucky’s words from earlier this evening ringing in your ears. This is what your life has always looked like, but is this all it will be — waiting for your slice of Sam’s increasingly divided time? You’re happy for him. Truly. Sam deserves everything that the mantle of Captain America comes with — the attention, the popularity, the spotlight. You’re overjoyed that the world is finally seeing what you’ve seen in Sam all along, but a small part of you is jealous. And that jealousy is starting to eat you alive. 

You sigh, downing the last of your beer before sliding your phone out of your pocket. Scrolling through your contacts, you find Bucky’s name. You listen to the phone ring twice before Bucky answers your call. Concern is evident in his voice as he says your name. You rarely call him this late, but you know you’d talk yourself out of this in the morning. 

“I’ll do it, Buck. Set up the date.”

“It’s about time, kid.”

You spend the rest of your agonizingly slow week second-guessing that phone call. Hell, you almost call Bucky at least a dozen times to cancel the date altogether — to simply state that Bucky’s advice is ridiculous and you’re perfectly fine with your current situation. But, ultimately, you decide this is for the best. If your goal is to get over your absurd crush on Sam Wilson, then you actually need to start working on it. So, even though you’ve managed to worry yourself sick on Friday, you still manage to get yourself ready that evening and leave your apartment. A small smile pulls at your lips as you stand outside the address Bucky texted you several days prior. You’re thankful he chose a casual ramen spot for the blind date. It makes the whole experience a little less high stakes — like you could leave at any time with limited consequences. 

With an exasperated sigh, you finally bite the bullet and pull open the door to the small establishment. The bell above you rings, and you’re greeted by a friendly man behind the counter, telling you to sit wherever you want. You turn towards the quaint dining room and, to your surprise, see a familiar figure sitting at one of the tables. Sam Wilson looks just as surprised as you feel. Your feet move on their own accord as you approach your best friend. He looks nice — clad in a maroon polo and his nicest pair of jeans. 

“What are you doing here, Sam?”

You found it strange that you never received your weekly text from Sam asking you about your Friday night plans. But you concluded that either Bucky told him about your blind date or Sam planned a date for that evening as well. But this was an outcome you never expected.

“Bucky set me up on a blind date with one of his friends.”

Your brow furrows at Sam’s confession.

“Bucky set me up on a blind date with one of his friends.”

Sam looks at you as if you’re speaking a different language, and embarrassment washes over you as you realize that you’re right: Bucky Barnes only has two friends, and they’re currently looking at each other stupidly in a family-owned Ramen joint. Anger rushes through your veins as the realization sets in, but Sam still looks dumbfounded.

“So, Bucky set us up on a date.”

“Oh.”

You wait for him to continue, but he just sits at his empty table, at a loss for words. Usually, the silence between the two of you is comfortable; however, right now, it's excruciating. You suddenly feel about two inches tall as you stand before Sam. As the room gets twenty degrees warmer and the walls begin closing in, you decide it’s probably best if you get out of here. 

“This was a stupid idea.”

You turn away from Sam, but before you can take a step towards the door, he grabs your hand. The contact causes you to look back at your best friend, whose gaze is surprisingly tender. Your body relaxes ever so slightly, and, against your better judgment, your hand tightens around his. 

“It doesn’t have to be.”

His tone is genuine, but there’s still that voice in the back of your head gnawing at you. There’s no way that your best friend suddenly wants to go on a date with you. That shit doesn’t happen in real life. This isn’t a movie — he hasn’t been waiting almost two decades for this exact moment to express his feelings for you. You keep your expectations low because although Sam is a superhero, this isn’t a fairytale. Still, you let him gently tug your body into the seat across from him. 

“You don’t have to do this, Sam.”

Sam’s brow furrows, and a look of genuine confusion washes over his features. He studies you for a moment before speaking. 

“You think I don’t want to go on a date with you?”

You roll your eyes at his question. This whole conversation is ridiculous, and it’s beginning to feel like Sam and Bucky are pulling a practical joke on you right now. But Sam looks at you expectantly, waiting for your answer, so you play along even though you aren’t happy about it.

“C’mon, Sam.”

Sam simply arches a brow at you with a bewildered expression, and for a moment, your resolve falters. What if this is real? What if this isn’t some stupid joke between Sam and Bucky? What’s the harm in just letting this moment play out? With a sigh, you look up at Sam, who is still studying your features. 

“Sam, I’m pretty certain that if you were interested in me at any point in the last twenty years, you’d have asked me out by now.”

Sam huffs out a laugh at this, and suddenly, he looks embarrassed. This reaction confuses you. Sam is a confident man — he’s rarely self-conscious about himself or his decisions. 

“Yeah, about that…”

Your heart lurches in your chest as he trails off, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly as he tries to find the right words. And as he meets your eyes, there’s an emotion in his gaze that you can’t quite place. 

“What is it, Sam?”

Sam sighs before speaking.

“This isn’t just platonic for me.”

Suddenly, your world comes to a screeching halt. This feels like an out-of-body experience — like some sort of dream — and you’re pretty sure if you pinched yourself right now, you’d wake up alone in your apartment. But that doesn’t happen. You’re really here with Sam, having this conversation.

“How long have you felt like that?”

Sam looks away from you as he thinks for a moment, wanting to give you an accurate answer.

“After we helped Steve with Hydra in D.C., seeing you in the hospital put things into perspective.”

You were working as a SHIELD pilot for almost two years when Sam went missing with SHIELD’s two most wanted fugitives: Steve Rogers and Natasha Romanoff. Because of this, it didn’t take much convincing for you to ignore your orders and help Steve stop the launch of the helicarriers. Bucky, acting as the Winter Soldier at the time, had taken out most of SHIELD’s air support; however, you and a group of four other pilots managed to get your birds into the air. Although the stakes were high, a part of you felt like it was old times — watching Sam soar through the air in his Exo-7 flight suit from the cockpit of your F-35 Lightning II. The fight was going well until Bucky nailed your left wing with a large piece of debris, causing you to go into a downward tailspin. You attempted to stabilize your aircraft but ran out of time. So, you decided to pull your parachute, but to your horror, the cord was stuck. Sam, grounded due to his broken wings, watched helplessly as your fighter slammed into the Potomac River. You were found by search and rescue after the helicarriers were destroyed and woke up in a hospital bed three days later. Recovery was agonizingly slow, but Sam never left your side — except to check on Steve every so often in the room next to yours. The memory brings a small, sad smile to your face.

“That was ten years ago, Sam. What stopped you from telling me?”

“Other than everything that happened after that? You’re my best friend — I didn’t want to risk that.”

You suppose he’s right. There was rarely a moment of downtime after you recovered from your fall into the Potomac River. The two of you immediately threw yourselves into helping Steve track down Bucky, and just two years later, all four of you were wanted fugitives due to the Sokovia Accords. Between the years you spent living on the run and the years you lost to the blip, there was rarely a quiet moment until Thanos was finally defeated — until now. 

“For me, it was after Riley.”

Sam’s eyebrows shot up at your confession, obviously not expecting for you to have fallen first. But, despite his excitement at this revelation, he stays quiet, letting you continue if you want.

“After losing him, I couldn’t help imagining it being you who got shot down that day. The idea haunted me in my nightmares, and I realized that if I lost you, it would be a different kind of grief.” 

Sam’s face softens, and he reaches across the table for your hand. He wraps his hand tightly around yours, grounding you back into this moment before speaking.

“You never have to worry about losing me.”

You scoff at his words, giving him an incredulous look.

“You’re Captain America, Sam. Running head first into danger is your job.”

“Okay, fair. But I have a very compelling reason to stay alive.”

You laugh, attempting to cover up how flustered you feel due to Sam’s words. It doesn’t work. Sam smiles as he notices the effect his words have on you. He could get used to this — flirting with you until you’re bright red and stumbling over your words. It’s undeniably cute, and he can’t believe it’s taken him this long to do it. 

After your emotionally charged conversation, you both need something to eat. The two of you both order ramen, and Sam doesn’t let go of your hand until two bowls are set down on the table. You enjoy your meal while Sam occasionally nudges his knee playfully into yours under the table before offering you a flirtatious smile. The conversation that flows between you doesn’t feel forced or uncomfortable — it feels both familiar and somehow brand new. The two of you had been navigating the grey area between romantic and platonic for so long that it feels almost liberating to look at Sam and know his true intentions. 

After Sam pays the bill, giving the establishment's owner a generous tip, the two of you fall into step with one another as you walk toward your apartment. The walk isn’t drastically different from the thousands you’ve taken before. Sam still slings his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side — except this time, you move your hand up and intertwine your fingers. He still walks up the stairs with you to your apartment, unlocking the door with the key you gave him ages again — except this time, he leads you by the hand up all five flights. And he still moves through your apartment as if it were his, opening your fridge to grab two beers and rifling through your junk drawer to find the bottle opener he knows is in there — except this time, as he places the beers behind you, he doesn’t move away. Instead, he keeps his hands on the counter, one on either side of your body, caging you in. His expression is soft, illuminated by the lone fluorescent light in your small kitchen. And there’s an adoration in his gaze that makes you feel lighter than air.

Steve’s words, from what feels like a lifetime ago, ring in your ears as you look up at Sam Wilson, who stands just a breath away: "As the world's expert on waiting too long, don't."

Tired of waiting, you grab Sam by the front of his polo and pull him into you, locking your lips with his as your chests bump into each other. It’s not a picture-perfect kiss; it’s a little sloppy and frantic, but it’s the type that makes up for the twenty years you spent dancing around your feelings for one another. Eventually, you break away from each other. Sam rests his forehead against yours, and the brightest smile you’ve ever seen graces his face — the man looks like sunshine incarnate as he studies your features.

“I should have done that ten years ago.”

The laugh that escapes you is melodic — a goddamn symphony to Sam’s ears. And he can’t help but kiss you again. And again. And again. In an attempt to make up for lost time and to prove to you, this was never just platonic. 

they’re called boops but i think it’s better as lil baps

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You’d think as a writer I’d be good at spelling. You’d think.

I love random fun facts sm

I collect them like shiny little rocks

Mostly because im not allowed a shiney rock collection anymore i live in a damn shoebox