I Have To Get Into Bed Twenty Times A Day Or Ill Start Following Through On Various Threats Ive Made

my friend took in a stray and she’s the cutest kitty ever but he named her oil so whenever he sends a picture of her me and my other friends look like we’re roleplaying as the US military

time to unleash this onto my followers

"you sound smart" that's because i've spent years doing academic writing to the point that it's my default cadence plus or minus the use of profanity as a tone indicator

"you sound stupid" that's because i'm dumb as fuck

Twitter really is a lawless place

Everyone on tumblr has Conditions. maladies. I log onto tumblr and my mutuals are unwellposting. Conditions I didn't even know existed and sound like dark curses but I will see a post from friend like "died about 60% today, fine now. Made egg on toast #yummytoast". There are so many people in this world with life experiences

having two pieces of media playing at the same time isn't enough anymore I need to be held

Pangaea was wasted on the dinosaurs. Imagine the railway network.

yeah as soon as I wake up no longer fatigued for the first time in my life I'll be set

me deciding to watch wwdits, good omens, and ofmd within like a 6 month period: hello lgbt community