Harry Potter Au But Make It Seventeen!

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min9yu_k: 🤍 pledis_boos: @saythename_17 ❤️🧡💛💚💙 min9yu_k: 🖤 HOSHI: 뿅 !!! 모두 수고 했어요!!! (Bbyong !!! Everyone, you’ve worked hard!!!) pledis_17: [17’S 도겸] 사랑하는 맴버들과 뽀뽀네컷😘 ([17′s Dokyeom] Kiss 4 cut with my beloved members😘) pledis_17: [17’S 승관] 이걸 원했나. ([17′s Seungkwan] Did you want this.) jeonghaniyoo_n: 취하는 과정🍻 (The process of getting drunk🍻)

die in your arms

pairing: prince!jaehyun x (f) reader

genre/warnings: smut, angst, horror, arranged marriage, unprotected sex, graphic descriptions of violence, mentions of vomiting and suicide, major character death

word count: 22.4k

summary: Every single night before bed, you play your royal husband, Jaehyun, a song on his grandfather’s piano as a distraction from the ominous sounds you hear. To the public, you’re all smiles, but discreetly, you’re a slave to your suspicions. Though it seems the more you pry, the more secrets you start to unravel.

author’s note: so, remember when i said i wasn’t writing a halloween fic? yeah, i lied. happy spooky season!

Don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t stop, you chanted to yourself, running because your life depended on it. 

Your feet hurt and you had lost track of how long you had been running for, but you pushed yourself forward even as your energy from the adrenaline started to dwindle. 

Never had you needed to fight for your life before. Fight for anything. Your legs burned from ache, begging for a break while your bare feet slapped against wet dirt. Your face was damp with tears and rainwater. But you never stopped. Not even for a second. 

Not as long as he was behind you. Even after hours of running, you knew he wouldn’t stop until he had at last caught you. He could run across acres of land and never break a sweat. 

Lightning struck and you screamed, only to realize it was the shrouds of darkness looming over you. You were on edge. 

“My love,” Jaehyun sang, calling out to you from a distance. 

His voice made you shudder, but you bunched your dress into your fists, the white gown difficult to run in. You didn’t look back, though you knew that he wasn’t far. 

Pushing Jaehyun’s voice to the back of your head, you tried to find an escape route. The garden had to stretch across at least a thousand acres. There was no end in sight. You were inclined to believe you were running in circles across perfectly manicured grass and stone trails. 

Jaehyun had the upper hand. It was his palace, for heaven’s sake. He had grown up wandering around these paths and exploring halls that were carbon copies of each other. You had barely made it out of the palace, clearing corridor after corridor, though unsure if you were making any distance because of how they paralleled.

You found another stone footpath, feeling the ground harden beneath your feet where moonlight shone through the tiniest of puddles. For whatever reason, seeing your scared face in your reflection gave you chills. Your face that was once perfectly made was ruined with streaks of mascara, black. 

What should have been the happiest day of your life had quickly turned upside-down. 

When you glanced aside, what you saw nearly got another hair-raising scream out of you, but you bit your lip hard enough to make yourself bleed. 

Horror was beginning not to explain your feelings as you fought for survival, wide eyes drifting around the pond in a perfect rectangle. There were tombstones surrounding the pond, watered by rain. You could see names etched on them; your parents, Jaehyun’s parents, and some of his servants. Dead fish floated in the water. 

“No,” you cried out, kneeling aside your parents’ gravestones. You didn’t care that your dress dirtied. You lost all purpose for it the second you saw him for the monster he had been all along. 

From the beginning this had only been a perfectly crafted game where you never had a chance. You were baited like an animal and Jaehyun was somewhere watching you like a hawk in the sky, because little did you know, you would never make it out. 

He had made sure of that. 

“This is your home now,” Jaehyun exclaimed, but it was all white noise to you. You didn’t even know where he was or how far he stood from you. Your mind was racing but empty all the while. 

You knew there had to be a shed somewhere. If you were quick, maybe you could hit him over the head with a trowel or a really heavy pot. If you wanted to make it out alive, you had to escape on your own. You knew there was nobody else alive out here aside from you and Jaehyun. 

Not to mention thinking about what Jaehyun would do to you if he caught you made your blood run cold, because you simply didn’t know. He was an enigma to you now. You went from living every little girl’s dreams of becoming a princess to living a never-ending nightmare.

“Darling. There you are,” Jaehyun said, as if he hadn’t already had you trapped. 

You screamed, screamed a silent cry, unable to hear his wet footsteps over the sound of your mind racing a thousand thoughts per hour. It was over. You lost. He had caught you. 

Jaehyun swept you into his arms and crooned, “Shh, it’s alright. Everything is okay, darling.”

Every exhale was a battle. You heaved, chest undulating, and tried to regain some semblance of composure. Your eyes studied the room and you realized you were no longer in Jaehyun’s boundless garden, but in his chamber. There was no rain pouring on you. Only sweat beading at your skin, cooling at your neck. 

“It was just a nightmare,” Jaehyun whispered, voice sweet and tender as it had always been. 

You still shuddered, but you were relieved that it was only a dream. You leaned into Jaehyun’s touch, breathing in the crisp air. 

You flitted your gaze to the balcony attached to the giant chamber, blocked off by a glass door. The royal blue curtains were drawn, giving you a perfect view of the garden it overlooked. Rain fell brutally and little droplets gathered at the screen. 

Nights like this were a recurring series of events ever since you started sharing a bed with Jaehyun. You would wake in the middle of the night, damp with sweat, screaming your lungs off. Jaehyun would hold you and whisper sweet nothings in your ears, trying to calm you down. 

If you were being honest, it wasn’t Jaehyun that was giving you nightmares, in spite of the fact that the one key element they all shared was that he would be hunting you down in all of them. It was the dangerous lack of sleep you were getting. Interestingly, the monarchy had owls that kept you up at night, and when you finally fell asleep, bad dreams loomed over you. 

For whatever reason, sleep deprivation made you prone to them. You tried to remind yourself Jaehyun was a great guy and your stupid brain playing tricks on you was not a reflection of his character, but the fact that you consistently had more or less the same dream solely about him made you antsy. 

Grow up. Dreams don’t mean anything. You sound like a little girl afraid of the monsters under her bed, you hissed to yourself, chastising. The fact that it was so silly was enough to make you promptly dismiss your worries. 

For the three months you had been engaged, Jaehyun took the extra time to get to know you. It was strange, because he didn’t need to. Your marriage was a business proposal rather than the kneeling before your lover kind, and both of your parents had influence throughout the country. You had never spoken until then. 

In spite of that detail, Jaehyun treated you as if he could see himself truly loving you one day. Maybe because he wanted things to be as non-awkward as possible, given that you would be sharing the same bed at night. 

By day, Jaehyun would flaunt you in front of the media and hold you flush against him at royal events as he did throughout your betrothal. The wedding had to have been the most remarkable occasion of them all. It lasted throughout the entire day, hundreds of thousands of people present to celebrate your nuptials. 

When you married, you moved into the palace, which was precisely when the nightmares started. Because of those goddamn owls. 

Some nights later, you shot up again, having yet another nightmare. Noticing the bedside lamp was switched on, you glanced to your side, observing Jaehyun with a book in hand and spectacles sitting squarely on the bridge of his nose. “Another bad dream?”

You nodded, biting your lip. You felt bad and slightly embarrassed. Never had you and Jaehyun shared a bed until your honeymoon, so his first impression of your sleeping habits were you being prone to crying out in the middle of the night. 

Jaehyun, setting his book to the side after marking his place, opened his arms for you. You crawled into them without hesitation. Over time, they had started to feel like home. It took the edge off your homesickness. 

This is your home now. You shivered. It’s just a dream. It’s just a dream. It’s just a very bad fucking dream, you comforted yourself.

Jaehyun whispered tenderly, “Tell me what you saw.”

You swallowed and damped your throat. Though you had told him about the owls, you kept to yourself the bit about him chasing you like a serial killer. “It’s a little dark,” you told him in fair warning. 

Jaehyun didn’t seem to give a damn. “It’s only a dream. It can’t scare me. Unless a monster is going to hop out of your cute brain and yell, ‘Boo!’”

You giggled. Leave it to Jaehyun to make you laugh when you needed it most. He had come to learn your needs over those three months of bonding.

Jaehyun threw you an expectant look. “Well?”

You hesitated, but ultimately gave in. Jaehyun was your husband now, for fuck’s sake. What couldn’t you tell him? “Well, every night I have the same nightmare about… you. You’re always chasing me throughout the castle. Every time, I get close to escaping, but you catch me in the end. And then I wake up.”

“It’s not very realistic.” 

You pulled back, giving him a look. “Hm?”

“I would never chase you,” Jaehyun said. “I will always have you right where I want you.”

Your eyes flickered. It was an unsettling comment, but you tried to let it go. Jaehyun doesn’t have an evil bone in his body, you reminded yourself. He’s harmless.

Jaehyun clambered out of bed, sitting his spectacles on top of his book, and stood on two feet. When you merely watched him with interest, he beckoned you to mirror him. “Come on. I have something to show you.”

Hesitantly you obeyed him, crawling from bed and sliding on your slippers. Following him into the halls, you walked hand in hand with Jaehyun the entire time who had laced his fingers through yours comfortably. The gesture made you smile, no matter how little. 

Like in your dreams, the corridors were of length and resembled each other almost precisely. High stone walls stood tall, statues at its sides, and chandeliers glared at you from above your heads. Given it was after nightfall, the halls were dimly lit. 

One of the statues you swore you saw move and give you a mean glower. You asked curiously, “Did you ever break anything when you were a child?”

“Not that I remember. No.”

“Huh,” you retorted. “You must have been a wonderful child.”

“I stayed in my room and looked out the window,” Jaehyun muttered under his breath. 

Your eyes flickered.

Jaehyun brought you to a room at the very end of the passage but before he drew the doors open, he told you softly, “Close your eyes.”

You rolled your eyes, but did as told, giggling. Jaehyun got a hold of both of your hands and placed them over your face for safe measure. Then, he drew the doors open, pushing you inside. 

Jaehyun guided you mysteriously throughout the room and you let him without question. You knew he had switched the lights on, the corners of your vision getting brighter in spite of the dark void, and he stopped you momentarily. 

“Now, open.”

You slowly opened your eyes, squinting while you adjusted to the bright lights. Then they focused in front of you, and what you saw made you giddy with excitement. 

“Whoa,” you gasped, running a hand over the grand piano. It was royal blue, monarchical patterns thoughtfully designed over the lid. 

Jaehyun was sporting the biggest smile you had ever seen. “Do you like it?”

You bobbed your head. During your engagement, you remembered telling Jaehyun, en passant, that you had been enamored with playing pianos since you were little. “You remembered,” you said quietly, touched. 

Jaehyun’s dimples showed and it was the cutest thing ever. He spoke softly, “This was my grandfather’s piano. He hated bad weather and played it when it stormed. I know that it’s not the same, but I thought that maybe if you played the piano before bed, it would help with your nightmares.”

“That’s really thoughtful of you, Jaehyun,” you replied, heat spreading through your chest like wildfire. “Do you want me to play you a song?”

“Yes,” Jaehyun said and pulled out a chair. 

You sat on the piano bench, getting comfortable and warming up your fingers lest they cramped in the middle of your impromptu performance. For a multigenerational piano, it was still in perfect condition. 

“My mother taught me this,” you told him in preparation. 

You proceeded to play him a mind-blowing masterpiece, your eyes and hands trained to the keyboard. Jaehyun was dumbfounded that any human being could be so graceful while playing an instrument and kept himself fixed to your supple fingers. He was enamored, knowing then and there that he wanted to hear you play your sweet song forever. 

Eyes closed, everything disappeared behind the sound of the keys, and you carried yourself to a world where there was nothing but you and your piano. Where no harm could reach you. 

Me and my song. That's how you got through everything. As long as you had a piano, everything would be okay. 

When you were done, you glanced up at Jaehyun, studying him for a reaction. 

Jaehyun was all smiles. He was endlessly proud of you, clasping his hands together in applause when the performance ended. His heart was asking for an encore, and he knew you most likely wanted one yourself. He could see that you were truly at peace when you played, in a world of your own, at your happiest. 

“You’re the most talented player I've ever heard,” Jaehyun whispered sweetly. 

Heat filled your cheeks and you hid it with a roll of your eyes. “You’re only saying that because I’m your wife.”

Jaehyun took your hands in his palms again, kissing the back of your palm tenderly. “You are my talented wife, who I love very much.”

Your heart stopped. His wife. Who he loved. He loved you? You expected to be merely something he had to put up with, but Jaehyun had come to genuinely love you. To say nothing of yourself. This boy had swept you off of your feet in no time at all. 

“I love you too,” you whispered back, smiling so hard your cheeks hurt. Now that he had done such a thoughtful gesture, you loved him even more. 

Jaehyun saw the stars in your eyes and squeezed your hand. “Are you ready to go back to bed?”

“Yes,” you chirped with glee. 

Jaehyun hoisted you into his arms bridal style and you squealed in surprise, wreathing your arms around his neck while he carried you back to the bedchamber. 

You slept soundly after that. No screaming. No nightmares. 

As it turned out, his grandfather’s piano was the perfect countermeasure for your night terrors. You were dumbfounded that you actually managed to sleep through the whole night, well rested for the formal dinners and publicity appearances that came with being royalty.

For each of them, you clung flush to Jaehyun’s side, radiant. You didn’t speak unless spoken to. It was no question why you of all the women from a handpicked list were selected to become his wife. You had been cautiously groomed for the role, the pretty and obedient little thing meant to stand by the prince's side and carry his children. Especially his son.

Maybe it seemed demeaning, though you had no intention of making waves in the monarchy. You kept in step, rather than marched to the beat of your own drum. You were more than content to silently bathe in their luxuries and confide in your husband.

But it did get lonely.

One lazy afternoon, just after lunch, the king approached you and Jaehyun as the two of you were shooting the breeze in The Great Chamber. You noticed his father first and greeted him respectfully, “Good afternoon, Your Majesty.”

Jaehyun opted for a polite bow. 

The king motioned his head. “Good afternoon. I am only here to announce your mother-in-law and I’s departure. We will be traveling abroad on business for a couple of weeks. Your mother-in-law is already with an escort waiting outside the exit hall.”

That baffled Jaehyun. “Why the abrupt exit?”

“We have some affairs to attend to that couldn’t wait and we owe the prime minister a favor. We will return as briefly as possible.”

Jaehyun nodded. “Travel safely.”

“Of course. And son, the country is yours in our absence,” said the king. Then, he locked eyes with you. “Yours as well.”

You were stunned for a couple of seconds, but masked it well and replied demurely, “Yes, sir.”

The king bid each of you farewell individually then scurried to the exit hall with his wife to be chauffeured to their private charter. 

Jaehyun met your eyes with a mischievous smile and said when his parents were out of earshot, “Appears it’s just the two of us.”

“Mm-hm,” you hummed, amused by the amount of sheer mischief in his stare. “Just me, you, and the hundred other people that live in this palace.”

Jaehyun chuckled, lifted your wrist, and pressed a sweet kiss to the back of your hand. “What if I sent everybody home? You heard my father. I’m in charge.”

“I also very clearly heard him mention that I’m in charge too. And I don’t think that’s a very good idea. Who’s going to make the spoiled prince’s every meal three times a day, everyday?” 

“Fair point,” Jaehyun mumbled. “Do you really think that I’m spoiled?”

You replied without skipping a beat, “Rotten.”

“What a shame,” Jaehyun said. “Would it also be a shame if you came upstairs to spoil me some more?”

“Only if you didn’t spoil me back,” you replied tamely, but Jaehyun could see the unbridled lust in your eyes. It never lied to him. 

You two scurried through the halls like a pair of hormonal teenagers, staggering towards the elevator with dwindling patience and giggling the entire ride upstairs. 

When you came to bed that night after spending an undocumented amount of time playing Jaehyun the piano in what was once his grandfather’s bedchamber, he threw his big arms around your waist and drifted off to the view of your backside. 

But when you abruptly woke, he was nowhere to be found.

You sat up in a panic. He’s just using the bathroom. Yeah, that sounds about right, you consoled yourself. The clock stared back at you on the wall, and noting the time, you decided you would wait for him to return. 

Jaehyun never returned to his bedroom. You watched hours tick away at their own pace, but there was no sign of him. And in lieu of your husband’s soft snores, you only heard those familiar owls, feet dragging down the hall, and impatient ticking. 

Which was completely unnerving.

You didn’t get any sleep that night. Not until Jaehyun at last came back and worriedly asked why you looked as if you had just finished a twelve-hour shift in the dungeon. 

Choosing to ignore him, you snarled, “Where were you?”

Jaehyun’s eyes flickered. “Well, I was in the study. I had some late night affairs to attend to.”

“The king and queen are absent. Our royal activities have been suspended. There is nothing you could possibly need to take care of at four in the morning,” you pressed, arms folded. 

“Most of our royal activities have been temporarily suspended,” Jaehyun corrected with a swiftness. “Why do you think my father left us in control? The country never sleeps.”

You sulked, especially grumpy from the lack of sleep. 

Jaehyun watched you with surprise. Your grouchy, irritable attitude graveled him, because he couldn’t comprehend what he had done that was so wrong. “What’s gotten into you?”

You exhaled loudly. Maybe you were overreacting a little. Jaehyun did make a valid point, after all. Somebody still needed to nurse the country in the king and queen’s absence. “I’m sorry. You’re right. I’m being unreasonable,” you replied, unable to justify your cynicism. 

Not to mention you couldn’t think of a single other thing that Jaehyun could have been doing so early in the morning. It was a completely plausible excuse, whether you believed it or not. And it wasn’t as if Jaehyun had ever given you a reason to doubt him. 

But the feet dragging through the halls was the second most eerie sound you had ever heard, just after those evil owls that reminded you too much of gargoyles. You chalked it up to some staff members keeping guard on a late shift and gave it up. 

Jaehyun pried your stubborn hand away from your crossed arms and you let him. His touch was exactly what you needed to soothe your unease. “You look tired,” he commented. “Have you been sleeping?”

“No, I was waiting for you to come back,” you grumbled gruffly and stifled a yawn out of habit. It was unladylike, they said.

Jaehyun chuckled in amusement, but scolded, “You shouldn’t wait up for me. I’m a busy man and a princess needs her beauty sleep.”

“Maybe I feel safe when you’re next to me,” you mumbled under your breath, eyes fixed to his thumb rubbing circles at your wrist. 

“I’m never far from you, baby,” Jaehyun reassured you gently. “I’m always two steps behind you.”

“Behind me or ahead of me?”

“I’m omnipresent,” Jaehyun whispered and kissed your cheek sweetly. “You can play the piano. I can sing. Would you like for me to sing you a song?”

“Yes,” you replied without stopping to mull it over. 

Jaehyun told you to lie back down and you obeyed without a second thought, slipping under the blankets. You felt even warmer when he snaked his arms back around you and started to croon softly in your ears, voice tickling your neck and ultimately lulling you back to slumber. 

Whether or not he got back up after that was entirely unbeknownst to you. 

You slept so peacefully in Jaehyun’s embrace that you didn’t even rouse until afternoon, well after Jaehyun had slipped from bed and told you good morning, whispering something in your ear about how he had duties to attend to.

You, on the other hand, were cleared of any scheduling. Which gave you ample time to explore the gardens. 

Now sporting a pretty knee-length dress, you had some tea and toast as a makeshift breakfast and scuttled outside in quick, short strides. The grandiose garden was easily your favorite spot in the whole palace. You could get lost in its labyrinth of superbly pruned shrubs and terraces decked in flower petals. 

For lack of a better word, it was a humbling experience. It made you feel small to be isolated in such a huge garden. You may have been a princess, next in succession to the queen’s throne, but you were also just some girl in a world larger than you would ever know. 

You could prance around and gawk at pretty flowers day in and day out. It didn’t take much to keep you happy. But you rather liked company. 

When you noticed one of the gardeners you recognized tending to some blossoms, you chirped, “Hi, Giselle.”

Giselle greeted you very respectfully, curtsying at your presence. “Greetings, Your Royal Highness.”

“Oh, please,” you said, almost rolling your eyes. “You can call me by my name.”

“The king and queen wouldn’t approve of the informalities, ma’am.”

You didn’t really give a damn and waved her off, replying nonchalantly, “While that is true, the king and queen are not here, and it’s only the two of us in this garden. When we are alone, you may call me by my name and I will call you by yours.”

“If you insist,” Giselle replied, followed by your name. 

You smiled triumphantly. 

From your previous encounters and run-ins, you had already gathered that Giselle unfortunately wasn’t very much of a talker, though you couldn’t fault her. She did what she was told and minded the business that paid her. Literally. It would do her no good to kindle conflict in the monarchy. 

“These flowers are pretty,” you remarked absentmindedly. 

Giselle hummed. “They’re azaleas.”

“Elegance, temperance, and death,” you said knowledgeably, staring from the terrace. 

Which surprised Giselle. “Are you into flower symbolism?”

You shrugged. “I know a thing or two.”

“Hm.”

You pointed to some other flowers. They were very recognizable to you at this point. “Those are white roses. Purity, innocence, loyalty, and fresh beginnings. It’s no secret why they were scattered all over my wedding.”

“Secrecy and silence,” Giselle added offhandedly.

For a couple of seconds, that, metaphorically speaking, threw you off balance. “That too,” you said quietly.

Giselle said nothing. 

You considered making peace with the silence, but with your thoughts at daggers drawn with one another, you quickly accepted that wouldn’t be possible. Secrecy and silence. There was no doubt it suited the monarchs aptly. Sometimes you even wondered what you knew about Jaehyun, because he was ghastly private.

Maybe you weren’t the closest of married couples, but you knew enough. Jaehyun liked music and singing. He was introverted and quite shy, which was laughable when considering that he was soon to become king. He was calm and sensitive. Sensual, but reticent. 

Jaehyun already made clear he loved you. Maybe with time, he would show you his heart. 

Then, you had another thought. Secret, but not so much silent. “Hey, Giselle,” you called out. “Do you ever hear strange noises in the palace?”

“I don’t know what you mean. Everything is normal in the royal palace.”

You frowned. It hit you that you never asked Jaehyun if they bothered him. It was possible that growing up in the castle had numbed him. “I hear owls at night.” 

“That is because there are owls and they are nocturnal. We haven’t tried to get rid of them because they are helpful with the garden,” was all Giselle said. 

“Well, sure,” you mumbled, because it was an entirely logical explanation. “But what about the noises I hear in the hallway?”

“Some employees take late shifts to keep guard of the palace. They are merely monitoring the halls.”

That was what you told yourself, because it was completely reasonable. But something about this place gave you a bad gut feeling and left a bitter taste in your mouth. You couldn’t explain it, because it was just a hunch. 

“In all due respect, what you hear is elementary. Word of advice? Believe what I tell you now or get two hours of sleep at night later.”

You recoiled in surprise. “Excuse me?” 

Giselle turned around, glanced around for any watchful eyes, and made eye contact with you. She stepped onto the terrace and whispered, “I hear scratches in the walls and cries in the floorboards. You can rationalize footsteps in the hallway, but whimpers in the chamber? Not so easy. Convince yourself that it’s nothing while you still can.”

“If I have to convince myself that it’s nothing then that means there’s something,” you shot back, looking her plain in the eye. Which also meant there was something she wasn’t telling you. “What are you hiding?” 

Giselle wavered, hesitant. She wore it on her face. Her body language was screaming at you and you desperately wanted to know what it was saying. “You’re royalty,” she finally said after a moment. “You have lived lavishly your whole life without ever needing to worry about a thing. Maybe I envy what you have, but I’m not telling you this from a black heart when I say my woes are not yours.”

You didn’t bristle, but softened. She was opening up to you, and you knew there was more to this tangent of hers. 

“I come from a poor background and work here to provide for my household,” she said tamely, harboring no resentment whatsoever. She wasn’t the least bit vindictive. “Because of that, I can’t afford to poke my nose where it doesn’t belong. Even if it keeps me up at night.”

“The noises,” you said. “They keep you up at night?”

“Because of that piano,” Giselle grumbled under her breath. 

“What?”

Giselle pivoted and walked back to the plants, dismissing your concern. “I’ve already said too much. Please, mention this to nobody. But if you must, leave my name out.”

You nodded. “Off the record.”

Giselle smiled thinly. 

Backpedaling, you pointed to another shrubbery of flowers. “What are those?”

“Hydrangeas. They might seem high maintenance, but they are fairly easy to take care of. The queen loves them, so I give them some extra attention,” Giselle told you while hoisting a watering pot. 

You hummed. “Blue flowers.”

“Desire, love, and infinity,” Giselle sighed poignantly. 

For half an hour, you volunteered to help Giselle with her gardening duties before she shooed you away, claiming you had done enough of her responsibilities. You wandered in the garden still, lingering, just outside of Jaehyun’s bedchamber window.

When you glanced up, you saw him watching you fondly through the balcony screen, and waved him down with a beaming smile.

Jaehyun was downstairs in a flash, sporting chinos and a casual blazer. He looked very handsome, which was nothing new for him. Plus with his pretty brown eyes and adorable dimples that were both impossible to not get lost in, you had to will yourself not to swoon.

“Hi,” you greeted. 

“Hi,” Jaehyun replied, mirroring you. Except he leaned in to snake his arms just below your ribs and kissed the corner of your mouth. 

You smiled at his affections, though they had disarmed you a long time ago. His ability to unsettle you when he was gone but soothe you when he touched you was to be studied. “How has your day been so far?”

Jaehyun groaned. “Next subject.”

That got a chuckle out of you. Being the ruler of a country was no easy feat, but if there was anybody fitted for the role, it was Jaehyun. “Hopefully your parents haven’t left you with too much trouble.”

Jaehyun shrugged his shoulders. “I want to relax. You look like you’re having fun.”

“Something like that.” 

You decided against confiding in him about the reality of your day thus far. Not because you didn’t trust him, but because you weren’t sure of anything yourself. Giselle had mentioned something about the piano he had gifted you. Jaehyun might have been your best bet at knowing what she meant, but you needed to do a little more investigating before you got him involved. 

Now that you had another person’s opinion, you could say with total confidence that you weren’t crazy. There was something spooky going on in the monarchy and you wanted to know what. 

For now, you would shove the thought to a corner in the back of your mind. Days at the palace were full of whimsical fun. The nights were terrifying. 

Speaking of whimsical fun, Jaehyun spoke up and asked, “Do you want to ride the ferry with me?”

That caught your attention. “Ferry?”

“Yeah. There’s a huge lake down this path and we have a mini ferry that travels from one end to the other. You interested?”

“Sign me up,” you exclaimed enthusiastically. 

Getting a hold of your hand, Jaehyun walked you through the courtyard to the wooden dock at the top of the lake. Unsurprisingly, it had a decorated roofed patio with a lounging nook to wait for the vessel to return.

Fortunately for you, it was already waiting at the dock, unoccupied save for the captain Jaehyun had called up during your relaxed walk to the boating site. 

Jaehyun helped you aboard, having done this more times than he cared to admit. When you were safely secured on the tiny ferry, you thanked him for being a gentleman and watched him climb aboard himself. 

The captain exited the wheelhouse. “Once to and from, Your Royal Highness?”

“Make it twice. We have time to waste,” said Jaehyun, looking at you with all the affections a man could possess. 

Shortly afterwards, you started moving. You stood beside Jaehyun and gripped the railing, watching the water splash beneath the boat. This place was beautiful, no doubt. Your choice to get married in the garden was unregretted. 

Eerily beautiful, you thought. Though you loved the garden, there were a couple of places you avoided. Mainly the ones that made appearances in your nightmares, like the shed. 

The silence was comfortable, both you and Jaehyun soaking in the view, but you broke it to say, “You’re an only child.”

“I guess you could say that.”

You gave him a look. “What do you mean?” 

Jaehyun shook his head, dismissive. “Nothing. Keep talking.”

You were curious, wanting to know all there was on this boy, but let it go for his sake. “Doesn’t it get lonely - alone in this big palace? Your parents are busy nurturing the country like it’s their own child.”

Jaehyun didn’t show a single fucking emotion on his face, though that was far from shocking by now. When it was time to get personal, he became the iciest man you knew. His cold indifference somehow burned you.

You grimaced when you saw his face. “Sorry if I crossed a line.”

“No, it’s okay,” Jaehyun replied, giving you a reassuring kiss to the cheek. “I was lonely before I met you. No siblings. Few people I could trust. When I was young, I learned rather quickly that life is a game of survival. You can never be too sure who’s friend or foe.”

You listened attentively, nestling closer to his chest. 

“I was taught to be my own guard, in a way. And there’s nobody to blame but myself for chasing away everybody who tries to get close. But then you came,” Jaehyun said, smiling at you adoringly. “And there was an instant connection. I think I saw pieces of myself inside of you.”

“You did?”

Jaehyun bobbed his head. “Yeah. Some people see this meek, demure princess, but I see the woman that almost cooked my ass when I wasn’t tucked into bed with her,” he joked, getting a laugh out of you. 

You giggled. 

Jaehyun was smiling like an idiot. It was cute and wholesome. “On a serious note, I see somebody strong and assertive. Somebody who’s not afraid to fight for what they want, even if it means going through hell and back. Somebody unbroken and undeterred.”

“Mm-hm. And you liked that,” you hummed, giving him a hooded stare. 

“You have no idea,” Jaehyun purred before leaning in to smash his lips against yours.

You giggled into his mouth. Your heart skipped a beat or two when Jaehyun kissed you, tempted to leap into the palm of his hands where she belonged. The Jaehyun you had come to know was a romantic and there was nothing more romantic than making out with your lover on a beautiful ferry ride. 

Except for making love with your lover below a beautiful ferry ride. 

“Below deck,” Jaehyun murmured in your ear, delicately slipping his hands from your waist to lace his fingers through yours. You didn’t hesitate to follow him through the little hall, coming out in a bedroom at its very end. 

You hardly even got to stand long enough to take note of your surroundings before Jaehyun hoisted you up and threw you against the silk sheets. You cried out in shock. Jaehyun had taken you more times than you bothered to count, but you were in awe at how rough the prince got when it came to sex.

When Jaehyun crept over you, staring at you with a blend of awe and unbridled lust in those pretty brown eyes of his, you combed your fingers through his dark hair and drew his mouth to yours again. 

You could hear your heart thudding in your ears as you kissed him slowly. Your lips only knew each other and you could taste the ecstasy on the tip of your tongue. To say nothing of the touches. While you were fisting his hair, Jaehyun stripped you naked, tossing your dress and groping your perfect breasts. 

Jaehyun was warm to the touch, but his fingers never failed to make you shiver. “I love the way your lips feel,” you confessed when he separated from your mouth. 

Only to kiss his way down your stomach, lips gentle and tender. Jaehyun cocked you a glance and grinned. “And what about my dick?”

“Don’t ask stupid questions. I love your dick, duh, but that’s a different conversation deserving of its own speech. Particularly a long-winded one with a very heartfelt peroration at the climax.”

Jaehyun’s head bobbed as he snickered at the thought, before teasing, “Well, we have the Great Chamber for that when you’re ready. Feel free.”

Your laughter rang out in the little bedroom. Then, Jaehyun switched on a dime, dragging your legs towards the edge of the bed before spreading them apart like jelly and burying his face between your thighs. 

Every time Jaehyun took you to bed, you remembered the first night of your honeymoon. When he took you to a cabin in the woods in April’s spring, flipped you over, and made you cry for all the forest to hear. By day, you watched nature and waltzed to his many vinyls, and by night, you made love for hours. 

And to think that was only a month ago. You felt as if you’d loved Jaehyun for years.

Jaehyun ate you out until you came undone at the mercy of his brutal tongue, clamping his palms at your thighs while you convulsed and shuddered, and undulated. Fuck, he knew your body too well. You arched off the bed one final time then slumped down, defeated.

You gawked in disbelief while he watched you scramble for breath with a cocked brow. Your body’s capacity for pleasure knew no bounds when Jaehyun was the one pleasing you. “Ready to take my cock?” he asked, excitement nipping sharply in his chest at the thought of ruining you.

You nodded your head almost instantly. Your lack of patience was written all over you and you wanted him. Right now.

Jaehyun’s hands were quick to reach for his cock, steering himself skillfully to bury himself inside of your pussy. A wet sound filled the air when he sank inside and you instantly moaned his name as though it was an instinct. 

You drove Jaehyun mad when you called out his name like that; with pining and desperation, and everything in between. Heaven had brought you to him and fate would keep you by his side until the very end. 

“Jay,” came your airy voice. Just being filled with your husband’s cock made you feel like you were elevating, ascending into the air. 

Your sounds were euphoric and drove Jaehyun to the very brink of madness, and with the last of his restraint gone, he was impelled to move at long last, thrusting into you at a leisurely yet hard pace. He lowered his face to meet yours, lips locked in a wet smack. You were skin to skin, your stiff nipples pressed against his bare chest. 

Every moment was as special as the first. As a woman groomed to become a figure of importance, you were raised to remain chaste until marriage. And the day you exchanged vows with Jaehyun, he made your whole body shudder. 

“God is a woman,” Jaehyun rasped, heart racing so quickly it might have burst. You were warm all over and his hands roamed every nook of your body, every curve. 

Even though you wanted to laugh, all that came from your mouth was a breathless moan. Moments like these where you knew nothing but Jaehyun, scooped into his strong arms, you couldn’t help but realize how lucky you were. Not a second went by where you took him for granted.

Things could’ve been different. Jaehyun could have been an insufferable spoiled prick that acted entitled to his wife, but he was far from the visions of him you saw in your nightmares. You were grateful to be married to a man that both respected you and valued your happiness. 

You locked your legs around him, pulling him into you deeper, and kissed him until the two of you were gasping for air. “You get me so wet, Jay,” you whispered, tangling your fingers through his head.

At those words, Jaehyun released an animalistic growl, so aroused you thought he might break. His thoughts revolved solely around you. How much like poison you were. How outrageously perfect you were. Head to toe. 

You beamed with pride, pleased to have such a dangerous effect on your husband. The two of you meeting each other was mutually assured destruction. Nothing had been the same since Jaehyun laid eyes on you. When he saw you for the first time, he knew that he had to have you. 

While your body rocked from the sheer force of Jaehyun’s thrusts, the boat gently thrashed in the water. Your breasts bounced and the sight had made Jaehyun lose what was left of his mind. One day, in the none too distant future, they would be swollen with milk and Jaehyun imagined you carrying his children. 

That thought alone could have finished him. He thought of it every time he fucked you full of cum, pumping his load inside of you rough and deep, just the way you begged for him to. Watching your belly swell with your shared child would do unspeakable things to Jaehyun’s psyche. 

Part of you drowned out the sounds of the water splattering against the boat in favor of listening to Jaehyun’s relentless groans. Your husband always had a flair for the romantic. Hopelessly, he used to think, until he met you. 

Staring up at Jaehyun, you were bewitched by the gentle gracefulness of his features, especially as they tensed with unbridled pleasure. “Can I tell you something?” you asked. 

Jaehyun nodded his head. “Anything,” he whispered. 

“You smell so good.”

Jaehyun’s laughter rang out in your ears. The sight and sound brought a smile to your face. You didn’t know anyone with a more perfect laugh and you would give anything to see it again. “That’s so random.”

“But true,” you added, inhaling his scent the closer he got to your naked chest. There was hardly any space between you two at all. 

Jaehyun was all smiling from ear to ear. “Can I tell you something?”

“Always.”

Jaehyun leaned into your ear, deepening his voice to a breathtaking whisper, “You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.”

Your heart stopped. There was something about his voice tickling your earlobe that made you gush and tighten around his cock. After searching for the ability to speak, you replied, “Funny. I feel the same way about you.”

Jaehyun chuckled deeply and you swore you became lightheaded. “Yeah?”

“Can I tell you one more thing?”

“Go for it.”

“I’m about to cum,” you told him, climax threatening to rip you apart. 

“I’m gonna make you cum,” Jaehyun said, voice dark with determination. You gasped when his fingers sank to your clit and his thumb teased your bundle of nerves. 

Heat swallowed you whole. You couldn’t process all of the sensations that your body was experiencing all at once. A scream came out of your mouth and Jaehyun stifled them with his palm as you trembled with orgasm, cursing the stars. 

Jaehyun didn’t stop fucking until he was certain that you couldn’t take anymore. You went round after round, fisting the sticky sheets, grateful that he chose to take two trips across the lake. You had time to kill. 

Your body was worn and utterly spent when Jaehyun was finished with you. You fell slack against the sheets, unable to move your stiff limbs. Given that Jaehyun was left with more than a handful of responsibilities, it should’ve come to you as no shock that he took his stress out on you.

And you were more than eager to let him. When Jaehyun made love to you, the power he wielded over you was endless. Your body was seized by him and your heart was his on a platter. 

“I love you,” Jaehyun whispered deeply in your ear. It was enough to drive any woman mad. You were too breathless to say anything back, chest undulating. 

For a couple of moments neither of you could hardly move and you stayed nestled into each other’s side till you regained the strength to hunt for your tossed clothes. Flush against Jaehyun’s skin, the sexual tension still lingered, and he was overwhelmingly aware of how naked you were. 

After quickly redressing yourselves, you just sat on the bed for a little longer, feeling the boat still sway and knowing you weren’t back home. Jaehyun’s hand was flat against your backside, never letting you forget that he was at your side. 

You tried to fend off some wandering thoughts, but your curiosity got the better of you and you surrendered to your need to know. “Jaehyun, I have something to tell you.”

Your tone was not lost on him. “It sounds serious.”

“Yeah, kind of,” you replied, swallowing the taste in your throat that made you nauseous. “It’s about my dreams. It’s not just the owl noises. I think there’s something else going on.”

Jaehyun’s brows were furrowed. “Like what?”

There was a lump in your throat. After you confided in him about your doubts and suspicions, there was no going back. “Like the piano,” you said, unsure of yourself. 

Jaehyun’s demeanor shifted suddenly, aggressively. He went from cool and collected to stern on a dime, chastising, “Stop looking.”

His tone affronted you. “Excuse me?”

“It’s for your own safety. You need not to worry your pretty little head.”

Narrowing your eyes, you pressed, “So there is something going on that you’re not telling me.”

Jaehyun exhaled a heavy breath, smoothing a hand through his hair. “Promise me you’ll stop prying. This is serious. I will tell you everything that you need to know when it’s time.”

“Jaehyun, you know I can’t promise that,” you whispered. 

“Please,” Jaehyun said, eyes glistening. 

God, he was begging you? It had to have been serious. You couldn’t fathom him pleading for you not to investigate otherwise. But rather than discourage you, it only intensified your will to get to the bottom of the matter. 

Massaging your temple, you sighed, “Okay. Pinky promise.”

You giggled when Jaehyun interlocked his pinky finger with yours, but you weren’t certain how long you would be capable of keeping that promise. 

Soon after your confession, the captain signaled that the boat had returned to the dock. Jaehyun led you back through the narrow hallway with your hand in his, as if nothing had happened. 

The sex. The little divulgence that followed. He’s way too naturally gifted at slipping back into this royal character, you realized. In a way, you already knew that. Jaehyun could fuck the daylights out of you then smile and wave at the media as if he was their innocent successor to the throne.

Though this was different. Jaehyun obviously had no intention of letting you know exactly what he was hiding any time soon. And if he thought you would just sit around and wait for answers, he had severely underestimated you just like every other man in this country. 

Something unforgivably dark and sinister was happening. That was undeniable. You just needed to find out what.

Hours came and went, as did people. Jaehyun was right, you supposed. The country never slept. The palace alone was bustling with life at all times. 

Which made you think. If both you and Giselle were apprehensive of the obvious skeletons the monarchy had in its closet, there was no way you were alone. Somebody else had to know something. Somebody with just as much to lose. 

You just had to play your cards right. Giselle didn’t lie when she said that she had a lot more at stake than you. Even if the royal family abandoned you for whatever reason, you had the safety net of your own wealthy family to fall back on. Not everybody was as fortunate. 

When the sun set below the horizon, Jaehyun accompanied you to his grandfather’s bedchamber, though only because you didn’t want him to grow suspicious. The piano was the only way to bulldoze your ceaseless thoughts. You were lost in your own head. 

“I love you, Jaehyun,” you told him out of nowhere.

Jaehyun looked pleasantly surprised. It wasn’t often you confessed your affections. “Where’s this coming from?”

Your mind wandered back to earlier. Though you weren’t happy about him brushing off your concerns, your heart couldn’t deny the way it thumped for him. “I never said it back. And you didn’t make me.”

“Because I already know.”

You blew out a breath. Your heart told you not to risk losing his trust, but your mind was screaming that he was keeping something from you. Days ago, you would’ve been more than content with submissively obeying your husband’s commands. 

But peace had never been an option. 

It wasn’t long before you crept into bed with each other. You slept peacefully and uninterrupted by any nightmares. Again. 

Breakfast was spent together as always. Now that his parents had left the two of you in charge, it was often the only time you had available in the mornings to share. 

Any other morning, you would complain, but you were waiting with bated breath for the opportunity to get away and sneak around like a thief in the night. You weren’t keen on lying to Jaehyun, but he would just have to understand the rationale. You couldn’t keep living antsily. 

You spread some butter on your toast and asked, “Would you like to visit the markets with me this afternoon?”

Jaehyun frowned. Had he not been so busy, he would’ve done whatever you wanted. You wondered why your schedule was so clear, because when Jaehyun was preoccupied, half the time so were you. “I would love to, but the committee needs my opinion on some political stuff.”

Your tone was disappointed, “Political stuff?” 

Jaehyun nodded. He seemed to have fallen for it somehow. “I won’t bore you with the details.”

“Well, I won’t keep you, then,” you said, taking a sip of steaming hot coffee. Jaehyun had made it for you just the way he knew that you liked it. 

“Are you trying to get rid of me? I’m not expected to be present for another fifteen minutes.” Jaehyun’s tone was light, but the accusation made your heart beat faster.

Donning your most innocent voice, you assured him, “Of course not. I just know how much you like to be punctual.”

“That is true,” Jaehyun muttered. 

Ironically, the hours seemed to drag on, because you couldn’t wait for Jaehyun to leave for once. The second he was finally far out of your vicinity you discarded your leftovers and prepared yourself for the grueling task ahead of you. 

Only when you emerged from the dining hall and set out on your little exploit did it occur to you that you didn’t have even the slightest clue who to ask. A couple of servants had been around quite longer than others, yet they were dreadfully tight-lipped. But for good reason. 

Bumping into a younger one, you exclaimed, “Oh, good heavens! Pardon me, Mr. Kim.”

Jungwoo bowed gracefully and replied, “No, I apologize, Your Highness. I’ll pay closer attention.”

“It’s fine. I’ve been out of it since I got out of bed with Jaehyun,” you confessed, flashing a courteous smile. 

To your surprise, Jungwoo threw you a baffled glance. “You share a bed with the prince?”

“Yes, he is my husband. Is that odd?”

“I’m surprised. It goes against tradition. The king and queen have always had separate bedrooms,” Jungwoo told you, scratching the back of his neck. 

That was news. Though given how secretive these people were, everything was news to you. “I didn’t know that.”

Jungwoo rifled through his pockets for a spare key, pressing it into a lock on a nearby door as he rambled, “I wouldn’t either, but my dad worked here. And my granddad. With their debts, they passed down useless knowledge.”

Your interest was quickly piqued. Maybe you didn’t need to take your chances with an older worker after all. Jungwoo, way more affable and approachable, bore the knowledge of generations. “No knowledge is useless.”

“Yeah, maybe, but it’s not exactly power,” Jungwoo said, grabbing some items out of a utility closet.

“What do you mean?”

You watched Jungwoo shut the door and promptly lock it behind himself. “There are some things it’s better you don’t know, ma’am.”

“I’m sick of other people telling me what’s best for me,” you grumbled irritably. “I already know about the piano. Well, kind of.”

Jungwoo’s entire attitude flipped on a dime. Glancing across the hallway twice as if he was preparing to cross a road, he dropped his items on a cart and spoke softly, “Follow me.”

Obviously, you were confused, but you didn’t dare disobey. This might’ve been your only chance at getting closer to the truth.

Jungwoo led you to a door hidden behind the stairway with a big sign warding off intruders, though it was locked, as to be expected. This family apparently couldn’t afford to take any chances. With what, you had no clue. 

Strangely enough, Jungwoo had a key and wheeled his cart inside of the room after it clicked open. You curiously trailed behind him once he locked it behind you, wanting to know all there was to learn about this place.

There was a chain to your right and Jungwoo tugged on it, watching the lights barely flicker on. It was dim and empty, and though it was a test of your willpower, you fought off your nerves and remained unbroken. 

Narrowing into a hallway, the entrance seemed to go on for a hundred miles and a half. Your footsteps bounced off every wall and the sound made you nervous. Of course, Jungwoo would never in his life knowingly lead you astray and you chose to have faith in the belief that he’d never bring you straight to danger. 

But it made you wonder. If you recalled correctly, Giselle mentioned something about scratching in the walls. Your understanding of architecture was limited, but this place had to be built in between other parts of the castle. 

Weird, you whispered to yourself, rubbing your arms. It seemed that the deeper you went down this hallway, the colder the air got. 

“Watch your step. It’s creaky,” Jungwoo warned, leaving his cart in the hall. You glanced around him to see what he was talking about and that was when you noticed another set of stairs.

You shook your head and cursed, “Pardon my language, but Jesus Christ - how deep does this shit go?”

Jungwoo chuckled. “Too deep, ma’am.”

You had no strength to tell him to drop the titles. This was a few conversations far from your first encounter with Jungwoo and he respectfully declined each of your suggestions for him to call you by your name. 

The floorboards did indeed creak as you stepped down them and the sound couldn’t have been any more unnerving. You appreciated Jungwoo dutifully walking in front of you as if he was defending you with his life. Not that there was anything down here to jump out and get you. 

You hoped. 

Whatever disaster of a room that you just walked inside of was far from what you expected this staircase to lead to, though you weren’t too sure. At the end of the seemingly never-ending hallway was nothing but a pile of junk. If you were being frank, it looked like a bunch of hungry wild animals had a field day. Things had been tossed. Almost as if a fight of some kind had unraveled here. 

It was a hot mess. The place looked a solid minute away from crumbling in on itself, and that was you being generous. Your arm hairs were standing at attention now. You took one good look at the barrels just shy of you, noted the temperature, and pieced together why. 

“It’s… a cellar,” you said, noticeably disappointed. 

“It was a cellar,” Jungwoo told you, glancing around and wrinkling his nose. “This room hasn’t been used for at least a decade.”

Voice dripping with sarcasm, you deadpanned, “You don’t say.”

“Oh, I say.”

Your lips parted and the room echoed with your laughter. You were very grateful that Jungwoo made you laugh, because it helped you forget how anxious everything about your surroundings made you. “Why?”

Jungwoo outwardly processed every emotion and confusion was the most expressive of the plenty. “Pardon?”

“Why did you bring me here?”

Jungwoo stepped forward, inspecting the walls as if he was checking for damages. And there were many. “Because I have something to tell you that I can tell nobody,” Jungwoo said, his usually chipper tone borderline stern. “But first I need you to tell me what you know.”

Those weren’t exactly inviting words, but it was Jungwoo. You could trust him. Or maybe you wanted to, at least, but you couldn’t even trust Jaehyun. You confessed, “Assuming you mean the piano, it’s nothing much. But I know it’s connected. To the sounds I hear at night, I mean.”

“Oh, the walking. And the whispers,” Jungwoo said like it was the most normal thing in the world. 

You shook your head in disappointment. You weren’t fucking crazy and Jaehyun’s family wasn’t going to trick you into thinking that you were. “I knew I wasn’t the only one.”

Jungwoo’s tone was only slightly accusatory, “Jaehyun doesn’t know that you’re investigating.”

You frowned. He was a little too good at this. “You didn’t phrase that like a question.”

“There’s no way that he would let you get this close.”

“It’s been justified,” you huffed, irritated. All this secrecy and suspense was killing you. You just wanted to get to the heart of… whatever.  

Skeptical, Jungwoo’s head was tilted. His loyalty was in you, but also the heir. “Has it?”

You donned your most assertive voice and reasoned, “Jaehyun is obviously keeping something from me. Things that keep me up at night for hours. I refuse to continue my life in such a manner. It’s an eye for an eye.”

Jungwoo listened to your rant and agreed that your actions were justified. Thus he would be keeping this between the two of you. With a nod, Jungwoo replied, “Okay, I understand.”

You nodded. “Good.”

“But I also understand the prince.”

Your eyes darted to Jungwoo. 

Before you could part your lips to speak, Jungwoo added, “Because once you know the truth, it spreads and festers like a wildfire. If you let it, it can consume you. That’s why I hate that you know this.”

“I don’t know anything,” you grumbled. 

“Jaehyun’s grandfather used to own that piano in his bedchamber,” Jungwoo started, passing down what only moments ago he thought was useless info. 

“Yes, I know. Jaehyun told me.”

“Yeah, well, his grandfather was extremely territorial with the piano,” Jungwoo said hesitantly. “If there was a problem, he cleaned it himself. Mended it himself.”

You were yet to understand what that had to do with anything. “Sounds like he just didn’t want anybody touching his stuff.”

“That’s what my dad thought, but apparently anybody who touched it either died mysteriously or disappeared without a trace soon after.”

Your expression shifted from confused to painfully perplexed. “That’s foolish.”

“I told you that my father worked here. He thought it was rubbish. Then, one day after leaving to clean that very bedchamber, he never came back home,” Jungwoo said, willing himself to keep it together. After so many years, grief was a nonfactor. Despair was channeled into anger.

“Jungwoo…,” you trailed, choosing your words carefully. You knew what it was like to lose somebody. “Are you sure?”

Jungwoo’s eyes were sharper than you had ever seen them. You never knew such an easy-going guy was harboring so much pain. “I’ve been told that because I’m grieving a loss, I’ll believe anything for closure. I don’t agree. There’s something fishy going on and unlike the others, I’m not afraid to admit it to myself.”

“This is a lot,” you told him. 

Jungwoo nodded, wholly aware. “True, but it doesn’t stop there. Did you know that Jaehyun had an older brother?”

Your shoulders stiffened, because you recalled mentioning that Jaehyun was an only child yesterday, and he became deflective. “No, I didn’t.”

“Yeah, four years older. Apparently, he died after falling out of a window.”

You grimaced. “He commited suicide?”

“So the story goes,” Jungwoo answered, but his tone said loud and clear that he didn’t buy it for one goddamn minute. “And get this - he fell from the window of his grandfather’s bedchamber.”

Scratching the back of your head, you asked skeptically, “How come the public didn’t know about the first-born son?”

Jungwoo snorted. “I had a feeling that you would ask. The royal family waits five years before announcing the birth of their children. Isn’t that convenient?”

“Almost too convenient,” you mumbled under your breath. If Jaehyun’s older brother died just shy of five years old, that would’ve simplified the process of covering up his death. 

Jungwoo glanced over at you, aching. And maybe a little desperate. “Do you believe me?”

A tiny sigh escaped your mouth and you planted your palm on your forehead, overwhelmed by the load of information that was just dumped on you and unsure what to do with its weight. “If what you’re saying is true, this is dangerous,” you replied levelly. 

Jungwoo huffed, “You’re telling me.”

“But Jaehyun and I have touched the piano on several occasions. I play it every night just so that I don’t have to hear those godawful noises,” you added, hesitating. “Shouldn’t I be dying?”

Jungwoo fell silent for a sudden, mulling something over. Then, he said quietly, “There is another possibility...”

“What?”

“Perpetuity,” was Jungwoo’s response, voice quieting even though only you were there to hear him. “This one I’m not so sure of. The rumor is that if you touch the piano, you meet one of two fates. Death at your hand, or being condemned to your worst nightmare. It sounds like bullshit.”

His confidence seemed to waver, but you were interested. You were driven by a determination to discover all there was to know about this godforsaken place. “How exactly is one condemned to their own nightmare?”

“Your deepest fear will become your ultimate fate,” Jungwoo explained, wrapping his arms around his torso. “Your worst nightmare will come to life. And you’ll live it everyday until you die.”

You devolved into nipping cold shudders. And it had little to nothing to do with the basically subzero temperature of the room that you occupied. Of course, Jungwoo didn’t mean literal nightmares, but it didn’t help that not too long ago you were being haunted by bad dreams. 

Your worst fear was living the same day for the rest of your life. Adventure was your natural instinct and curiosity was your vice. It’s what you stood for and a part of yourself that you refused to negotiate. You could’ve had every dollar that the world had to offer, but you would never gamble away your freedom. 

Thankfully, this life gave you more than enough. So what you were expected to be beautiful and ladylike when people had their eyes fixed to you. Did it matter? That didn’t change that when there was nobody there to judge you, you were liberated. 

Because it had always been that way, ever since you were a kid. You knew that to some people your existence served one purpose. And you didn’t care. You got to be yourself in the solace of this gigantic palace. 

At least for now. Freedom came with a sacrifice; your own sanity and peace of mind. And truth be told, you weren’t sure if it was a fair trade. 

“I’ve been having these dreams,” you started, swallowing. 

“What kind of dreams?”

“Bad ones,” you confessed, wanting to curl into yourself. Those dreams put the fear of god into you. “When the noises weren’t keeping me awake, these nightmares would take their turn. Jaehyun hunted me down in all of them. And I would wake up after he catches me.”

Jungwoo noticed that your voice was a little shaky and offered you a compassionate hand squeeze, saying, “It’s okay. They’re not real. Jaehyun wouldn’t hurt you.”

“I know, but…,” you trailed. “I had them repeatedly. Same dream, different night. The only other difference was that they would happen in another place. But they stopped after Jaehyun started taking me to play the piano before bed.”

Jungwoo stiffened. “That’s… convenient.” Like a lot of things here. 

“I know,” you agreed, shaking your head. Just the thought of Jaehyun was making you tremble with anger. You knew he was secretive, but it felt like he was borderline lying to you. 

Then again, Jaehyun didn’t deny that there was something that he was keeping from you. Instead of telling you cheap excuses of consolations, he admitted that there was something grave enough he couldn’t even confide in you about it. And you didn’t know if that was worse. 

Things were beginning to appear increasingly more eerie. “Do you want to know why I took you down here?” Jungwoo asked quietly.

Bobbing your head, you shifted to give Jungwoo your undivided attention. Something about the vibes of this room put you off. You didn’t like it. You could sense that something heinous had occurred maybe in the very spot that you stood. 

“The prince’s grandfather spent a lot of time down here.”

“Really?”

Jungwoo nodded. “Apparently, he flipped out one day and trashed the whole place. It happened a few days before he passed, so the story goes. Then, they relocated the cellar and closed this room off.”

That explains the mess, you thought to yourself. But not much else.  “Why would they do that?”

“Like hell I know,” Jungwoo replied with a shrug of his shoulders. “My bet is that they’re hiding something. Which we already knew, but I get lost every time I try to figure out what it is exactly.”

“You aren’t the only one,” you droned, releasing a pained breath. 

Jungwoo mustered a smile, but it was thin. “Well, if it’s quite alright, I would like to return to my duties, Your Highness.”

“Yes, of course. Thank you for everything. You’ve been a great help,” you said, bowing respectfully in gratitude. 

Jungwoo mirrored your movement. “It’s been a pleasure,” he told you sweetly. “I can’t skip out on my daily responsibilities, but if you ever need me, say the word and I’ll come.”

After thanking Jungwoo again and him assuring you that you weren’t in any way indebted to him, you trailed him up the creaky stairs and headed your own separate ways.

The brightness of the hallway compared to the lifeless cellar made you squint your eyes and wobble towards the edge of the stairs as you took a moment to readjust. Your brain also needed a second to process the newfound information. Now you had more answers, but twice as many questions. 

Maybe Jungwoo was right. Maybe knowledge wasn’t power; it was a burden. But you were already in too deep to quit looking. 

Jaehyun was too preoccupied to accompany you to his grandfather’s former bedchamber tonight and thus you opted out of the visit altogether. Of course, you knew what would inevitably happen if you didn’t press those keys, but you had an aggressive curiosity to sate.

The piano and your dreams were related. You knew that now. But if one of the piano’s unpredictable fates was to prolong its victims' agony, how come it abated yours instead?

For half a second, you wondered if Jungwoo was really telling the truth. You wanted to believe him, you really did, but something came to you and whispered not to trust anyone. 

Not even Jaehyun. Hell, especially not Jaehyun. 

Pulling the blankets over his thighs, Jaehyun glanced over to you as he crawled into bed and asked, “Did you have a good day without me?”

“It was long without you,” you replied, plopping a glass of water at your bedside in case you got thirsty. 

“I’m sure. What did you do?”

“A little bit of everything. I had the most wonderful dinner. I only wish you could’ve stuck around for dessert. The chef said he misses cooking in front of you.” It was only partly a lie. Your weakened appetite wouldn’t allow you to eat in spite of the full-course meals prepped for you. 

Jaehyun was smiling at some passing memories of him tagging along with you to aggravate the chef with curious banter. Though you mainly did all of the talking. “That’s good,” he said, chuckling quietly in amusement. “Tell him that I’m sorry I wasn’t there to hush you.”

Rolling your eyes, you grumbled, “Whatever.”

Jaehyun's infectious laughter filled your ears again. “Goodnight,” he whispered, leaning in to press a kiss to your brow.

“Goodnight,” you said back, releasing a shaky breath. For all of a second, you forgot that you were mad at him. His arms felt safe. Like home. 

This is your home now. A cool shudder wrecked through you. How Jaehyun could feel so dangerous but so inviting all at once was beyond you. 

You sank to your bloodied knees, unable to withstand the cramp shooting its way up your calves. Your tireless sprinting left you with just enough strength to crawl behind a door, thanking god that it was unlocked and quietly pushing it closed. 

The space was completely silent, save for your labored breaths that you endeavored to suppress. Jaehyun couldn’t have been too far. It was a blessing that you even managed to escape him.

For now. Something told you that he wouldn’t give up so easily.

Pure darkness suffocated you with its chokehold. You glanced up and searched desperately for a light source. Your surroundings were virtually invisible. Propping your hands on the door, you pushed yourself off of the floor and groped the wall for a light, finding a chain and tugging it impatiently.

It took a couple of tries for the lights to flicker on. The space around you was hardly any less dim, but at the very least, you could make out where you were.

“Darling, come back,” called out Jaehyun’s featherlight voice just outside of the door. “Let’s just talk. All I want is to talk.”

He was closing in. You never realized your heart could thump at this quick of a rhythm. You never imagined the day where you would be terrified for your life. Your eyes winced in pain as you moved along the cracked wall, but you couldn’t stop. 

Shivers tensed your entire body as you descended down the hallway. Bare feet hit the cold naked floor, because you opted out of running in heels minutes earlier. 

Jaehyun’s footsteps came louder, closer. You swore quietly to yourself, realizing that the lights might’ve shone under the door and given you away. But the harder you tried to move, groping the wall for purchase, the more tempted you were to cry out in excruciating pain. 

And then the worst happened. The door opened, a fraction of outdoor light stretching down the hallway to where you stood. 

Your heart screamed in panic and alarm. Fear was merciless. None of this was fair. Jaehyun could give chase for hours, and he would if it came down to it, but you were running on empty. 

“Baby, I know you’re in there,” Jaehyun called out gently, yet menacingly altogether. 

It took everything in you not to mutter, “Fuck,” under your breath as you tried to get further and further away from him, hoping and wishing that he wouldn’t follow you if you were quiet enough.

Taking in one deep inhale, you tried to stabilize your breathing, but after running halfway across the palace, your work was cut out for you. You walked inch by inch, careful with your motions in case your injured legs misstepped and you came to the ground with a resounding thud, and moved as soundlessly as you could. 

To your shock, you came across a stairway. In spite of how strangely familiar it seemed, you didn’t know where it would take you, but there was absolutely no way in hell that you were turning back.

 It was only down from here. 

Except there was a problem. The stairs had no railing and you didn’t trust yourself to feel your way through without tumbling down to your doom. You dropped to the floor again, putting your back to wherever the stairs led, and began to descend. 

Jaehyun’s footsteps let you know he was still there, easing his way down the dark hallway. You didn’t understand why he walked so leisurely, taking his time to capture you. Almost like he knew you wouldn’t get far either way. 

Your feet passed one stair at a time, cautious. You didn’t want to make any noise, but that ship sailed when one of the stairs creaked loudly. They reacted unfavorably to too much pressure, whining in response. 

Panic made your blood thump in your ear and you hoped that Jaehyun didn’t hear, but you gave up on that when he said, “Darling, I can hear you.”

With all hope gone, you scurried down the stairs, ceasing to care about how safely you got there as long as you still made it alive in the end. You didn’t focus on breathing. Only on getting the fuck out of here.

You kept glancing up the stairs just to make sure Jaehyun wasn’t too near until your foot touched a different cool surface and you knew you were at the bottom. When you turned around though, your terror only intensified. 

There was no place for you to go. Nowhere for you to run. There were no other paths for you to take because the room was a dead end. 

“Give up, baby,” Jaehyun said, finally at the top of the stairs. He was coming down, slowly but surely, and he was going to take you. “I’ve got you. There’s nowhere else for you to run.”

With every step he took down the stairs, you took twice as many backwards, wobbling towards a wall. Like there was some kind of secret passage that would save your life. 

There was no use anymore. Jaehyun set his feet on the floor and grabbed you just as you tried to turn away from him, pulling you into his open arms. You never stood a chance. He was stronger than you. Faster than you. 

“It’s all okay,” Jaehyun whispered as you sobbed, your back burning wherever his fingers attempted to soothe you. “We’re together now.”

Your body veered to life, jerking awake. Your eyes instinctively snapped to your legs, searching them for injuries, but at worst they looked slightly stiff. 

The rest of you trembled. You knew this was going to come, but it felt worse than you remembered. With a quick glance to your left, you noticed that Jaehyun wasn’t there. 

You didn’t know if it was really something that you should’ve thought twice about or if the circumstances were just naturally making you suspicious. Either way, you wanted to know where he was. After a long day of handling his responsibilities, he should’ve been unable to leave bed, and yet, his side of the bed wasn’t even a little warm. 

Too cold for him to be in the bathroom. Too cold for him to take a quick trip to the kitchen for a midnight snack. 

You impulsively decided to investigate and rose to your feet, putting your toes in your slippers and stealthing down the corridor. You didn’t know where to look, but it helped that you saw a light coming from just down the hall, and you followed it discreetly. 

All it would take was one wrong move for Jaehyun to overhear your footsteps. There didn't seem to be anyone patrolling down this corridor, which was typical, because Jaehyun’s family usually had their guards stand outside the entrance doors. 

That only meant that you had to be quieter. The door to Jaehyun’s office was wide open, inviting anyone to see what he was up to, but you didn’t want to make yourself known yet. You wanted to see who he was when you weren’t there. 

Ignoring the formidable stares of the statues, you crept closer to Jaehyun’s private office, breathing solely through your nose. The same hallways you loved to cruise seemed so much scarier when the lights were off.

Finally, you approached the light, hearing chatter the closer you grew to the door. You attached yourself to the wall, peaking your head inside ever so slightly. But when you saw what was happening inside, you stifled a gasp. 

Jaehyun was at his document-laden desk, looking far from exhausted, and he was sitting face-to-face with Jungwoo. 

“Accordingly, I will have to take charge of the country a little longer and my parents duties will fall into my palms,” Jaehyun said, folding his arms across the desk.  

Given that you were at an awkward angle, you couldn’t see Jungwoo's face, but you could hear the confusion in his voice, “I understand, Your Highness, though respectfully, I don’t see why you asked me here.”

“I’m requesting a favor.”

“May I know what it is?”

You shuffled to get a better glimpse into Jaehyun’s office, but scraped the floor with your heel in the process. You swore under your breath, hoping they didn’t hear you, and sensed your heartbeat quicken. 

Jaehyun stiffened in his chair. “Did you hear that noise?”

“Well, this palace is infamous for them, but I’m afraid that I can’t say that I’m a victim of sound,” Jungwoo replied, cocking his head to trail his gaze where Jaehyun’s had fallen. 

Your face tensed with confusion. Jungwoo didn’t hear the noises?

“That’s not what I meant,” Jaehyun said, standing from his seat to investigate. 

At the sound of footsteps, you quickly tiptoed towards a nearby door, pushing it open and squeezing yourself between hardware supplies. It was a tight fit, but you only focused on avoiding Jaehyun.

He glanced around both sides of the hallway, as if he was preparing to cross a bustling road. There was nothing. You were hiding in a closet merely a few feet away. 

You exhaled a quiet breath of relief when you heard him retreating, but frowned when you heard the door close behind him. You were clueless. What did Jaehyun have to hide? And with Jungwoo of all people, you wondered. 

Stumbling out of the closet and into the darkness, you crossed your arms. Jungwoo was one of the few people you found reliable here, but there was something he knew right now that you didn’t. You turned the corner to withdraw back to Jaehyun’s bedchamber, immediately jotting down a mental note to press him about it later. 

When you came back to bed, you found yourself still nervous without Jaehyun beside you. And you rebuked yourself for it instantly after. 

You didn’t realize it in your sleep, but the place where your dream occurred was the cellar Jungwoo had taken you to. Only darker. And with a soon-to-be king chasing you to the end. 

You shook your head with a groan, deciding that you would catch some sleep. For whatever reason, you had a strange feeling that you’d be needing it soon.

To your shock, it was daylight when you rose again. Somehow, you actually slept through the entire night. The only sounds that jolted you awake were those of impatient knocks coming from the bedchamber door. 

You exhaled grumpily and groaned, “Can I help you?”

“Good morning, Your Highness. Per your husband’s wishes, I’ve come to wake you for your schedule today,” came Jungwoo’s voice. 

Your eyes snapped open. Glancing to your side, you noticed that Jaehyun wasn’t there, and wondered if he ever returned. “I wasn’t aware that I had anything scheduled for today.”

“It was arranged overnight.”

“May I ask what was arranged?”

Jungwoo answered, “There will be a dinner party this evening in the east wing in honor of His Highness’ grandfather. The staff will be coming to style you shortly.”

Huh, I didn’t know that his grandfather’s birthday was today. Then again, Jaehyun was very private. “Okay, thank you.”

“You’re very welcome.”

Before he could run off to take care of his other tasks, you called out, “Jungwoo?”

“Yes, ma’am?”

You considered asking Jungwoo about his encounter with Jaehyun the night before, but decided at the last minute that you didn’t need him to know that you had been there. “Nevermind. Thanks a ton.”

For a whole day, you were kept preoccupied in Jaehyun’s bedchamber with a number of women fixed to you. The hours were so busy that you barely had time to think about your ongoing crisis. And half of you wondered if it was deliberate. 

At least for a minute, you did. With the corset throttling the life out of you, it was difficult to focus on anything else. You were grateful when they lessened the pressure on your organs. The dress was a sparkling royal blue, like you suspected the bulk of the guests attire would be. According to Jaehyun, it was his grandfather’s favorite color. 

It took hours for the women to finish with your makeup and hair. When the final touches were added, it was rapidly nearing dusk. The sun would be retiring below the horizon and the moon would settle over you now, quietly watching. 

Just after seven o’clock, an nth staff member came to escort you to the ballroom on the east wing. You were disappointed that Jaehyun hadn’t come, but sucked it up. Like you, he had most likely been preparing for the party. He must’ve had other roles to fulfill. After all, it was in honor of his late grandfather. 

His parents were out of the country, too. You remembered overhearing him mention to Jungwoo that their visit had been extended for whatever reason.

In a nutshell, he was a busy man. 

Most eyes fell on you when you entered the ballroom’s double doors. You greeted anyone nearby courteously and extended them a polite thanks for coming, as a princess should welcome her guests. 

But your attention was quickly drawn to your husband. You were still mad at him, or at least part of you wanted to be, but he looked mighty fine in that royal blue suit and his dark hair slicked back to hell. Goddamnit. 

“Jaehyun,” you said when you finally caught up to him, almost out of breath. He refused to stay in one place for longer than a minute, one-by-one mingling politely with the crowd. 

“There you are,” Jaehyun said, appearing more than glad to see you. Then, he grabbed your wrist, pressing his thumb to your pulse with an arched brow. “Your heart’s beating fast. Did you run a marathon before you got here or something?”

“Or something,” you murmured, shaking your head. Your husband was light on his feet. 

Jaehyun said to a server passing by, “Please get my wife something cool to drink.”

“Yes, immediately, Your Highness,” the servant replied, making a break for the kitchen. 

In the meantime, you scanned your husband. Other than his sexy suit that had your mouth watering to hell and back, Jaehyun was sporting a beaming smile, grinning from ear to ear. He looked happier than usual, in a way. 

“You’re giving me that look.”

You flinched. His voice broke your thoughts, but your eyes kept wandering; wondering. “What look?”

Jaehyun retorted teasingly, “The one that makes me feel like you’re going to eat me.”

You snickered. “It’s your grandfather’s birthday. He’d be turning in his grave.”

“I’m sure he wouldn’t mind as long as we had fun. My grandfather was big on milking a celebration for all that it was worth. He partied until his last breath,” Jaehyun joked. 

That was delightful news to you. “I didn’t know royals knew how to really party.”

“Please. You should see my mother after three shots of vodka when there’s no camera rolling. She’s full of crazy.”

Your heart simpered. There was a lot you didn’t know and hadn’t seen about this family. Remembering the thought itching at the back of your mind, you wanted to mention how he wasn’t in bed last night, but didn’t know if it was a good time. Instead, you opted for a quiet, “You didn’t tell me your grandfather’s birthday was close.”

You expected Jaehyun to respond with something deflective, but it caught you off-guard when he replied honestly, “There’s a lot of things I don’t tell you.”

Your eyes shone with shock, but you played it off. “Like what?”

Jaehyun kept his eyes fixed to your face without a word, as if he was studying you before making his move. “Darling, If I told you all there was to know about me, we’d be here for days,” he finally said. “Maybe weeks.”

“I want to know you,” you whispered, something poignant in your voice. 

“You do know me.”

The gleam in your eye shifted from sad to vicious, to coy. “Do I?”

Jaehyun nodded his head, gently smoothing a hand down the small of your back. “Yes, you do. I may not always lay my heart on the line, but deep, deep down inside, you know me. The real me, baby.”

Your eyes were staring into Jaehyun’s, like they were trying to forcibly peel back his layers and bare his soul to you, but it was all in vain. All you could liken it to was looking at someone with drunk double vision, your eyes deflecting two different images of him and your mind unsure of which one to trust. 

Sometimes I feel like you tell me just enough to keep me satisfied. And then you feed me more crumbs when I start to get cranky, like giving a bottle to a baby. 

“That drink you wanted, sir,” came a manly voice from beside you. 

“Thank you,” Jaehyun replied politely, handing you the glass of water. 

You accepted it gratefully, although your thirst was no longer for anything tangible. Nothing that you could touch with your bare, naked hands. It was for something deeper. 

Only a couple seconds later, Jaehyun said, “Well, I’d better get going.”

Your eyes went wide. “You aren’t staying with me?”

“I have some more guests to greet and then a speech to give, and then I should be all yours,” Jaehyun told you, shooting you a consoling grin. “You look beautiful in that dress, by the way.”

Your lips spread into a tired smile. “Thanks. I’ve been wearing it all day.”

Jaehyun snorted and gave you a final pat on the back of reassurance before stepping away. 

The party seemed to drag on without Jaehyun near your side and you were irreparably bored. You chatted with some guests with a polite set of white teeth ready to flash, but only because it was the expectation. Sneaking a couple of peeks at Jaehyun, it looked like he was still making his rounds. 

Usually, the king and queen would help, but they obviously weren’t here. Thus, it was Jaehyun’s problem. He couldn’t just leave his own grandfather’s party unattended. That wouldn’t be in good taste. 

You took a curious glimpse around and wondered how long you could disappear without anybody noticing. Probably only a couple of minutes. The whole ballroom would definitely know if you made a break for the double entrance, but if you slipped away through the kitchen, you had better odds. 

With your glass of water in hand, you casually sauntered towards the little back hallway, hopeful your guests wouldn’t question your getaway. 

When you entered the kitchen, you were immediately asked, “Where are you going?”

“Ten,” you gasped, a hand on your chest. He hadn’t even glanced up from his phone. You nearly dropped the glass of water. It had exhausted its purpose. “Would you ask that to a server?”

Ten retorted, “Would a server enter the kitchen with clacking six inch heels?”

“Touché,” you said. That explained how he knew it was you without even looking. 

Ten was the only son of the family chef and he had no regard for the royal life. Well, that was debatable. Your in-laws would’ve thought he was disrespectful, had they (god forbid) ever met. You took Ten as someone unafraid to challenge the status quo. Of course, the two of you vibed. It was refreshing to talk to someone who didn’t remind you of your title every now and then. 

Ten never, ever called you Your Highness. Not because he thought it was beneath him, but because he recognized your need for a friend. Not a follower. 

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“Just getting away for a second, if that’s okay with you,” you deadpanned, crossing your arms.

Ten gasped dramatically. “During the party in loving memory of your husband’s dead grandfather? That’s scandalous, babe.”

You scoffed. “Please. You’re not even at the party.”

Ten shot back, “I’m not married to the prince, either.”

Though you didn’t mean it at all, you snarled, “You make me sick.”

“You hate that I’m right,” Ten said boastfully, sporting a victorious grin. 

“Yeah, whatever,” you grumbled. “Where’s your dad? I thought the stew was supposed to be out fifteen minutes ago.”

Ten shrugged. “Smoke break. I wouldn’t eat it if I were you. Gave me the business.”

You winced. “Jesus. Well, I’ll be back. I need some fresh air.”

“I’ll let the hubby know if he asks questions.”

“Thanks.”

Then, you were on your way. 

The corridors were less dense than they typically were, though considering there was an event happening not too many feet away from you, you figured security was keeping a close eye on the hallway on the other side. 

If you were being frank, you had no clue where you were going. You just knew that you couldn’t be in that room with all those people much longer. Maybe you were starting to realize that the royal scene wasn’t for you. Or maybe it was your heightened suspicion planting those thoughts in your head. 

Whatever it was, you didn’t like it. You wondered if Ten would take you in. You had no idea what a day in the life of Ten Lee was like, but it wouldn’t hurt to find out. That was a nice backup plan. 

But leaving Jaehyun would sicken you in ways more lethal than any deadly disease. And Jaehyun would never forsake this life in this castle. 

It was a part of him. 

You’re talking crazy, you hissed to your insane thoughts. Perhaps it wasn’t a great idea to leave you alone by yourself with nothing but your thoughts and the silence that fed them. You might’ve been better off finding a guest with ears prepared to be talked off. 

The east wing was unfamiliar to you although much of it looked identical to the west one. When you somehow traveled back over to your side, it came to your attention that the gardens were nearby. Curious, you made a beeline for the doors, wondering if Giselle was out finishing up her obligations for the day. 

Night had dulled the sky completely when you stepped onto the familiar stone paths. The moon was there in her full glory, round and curvy with a thin veil of mist overneath, and the stars were few. 

The clacking thud that Ten spoke of was a telltale sign of your presence, but you didn’t see anyone there to warn. Instead, the sound grounded you in reality, keeping you as far away from your teetering thoughts as humanly possible. 

Wind was the only other sound. Actually, that was a lie; you heard owls lurking somewhere in the distance and knew they were wide awake. A sign that the night had truly begun. 

“Hello?” you called out. “Giselle?”

Silence. That was strange. These people usually worked from bright and early in the morning until unsettlingly dark and late at night, but of course, if Giselle had gotten off early, you couldn’t complain. Good for her. 

You were prepared to turn away and disappointedly retreat back to the party when you barely noticed something out of place in the corner of your eye. 

Blood. 

You were a curious person by nature. But this wasn’t an inquisitive investigation. This was a precautionary measure to make sure that nobody was injured. 

But what you saw made you physically nauseous, a stir settling in your belly instantaneously. Your first instinct was to scream at the top of your lungs. Giselle was sprawled out just shy of the ice cold stone, lying on her stomach in a thick pool of her own blood. 

“Oh my heavens,” you exclaimed, paralyzed with shock. Or fear. Probably a little (or a lot) of both. 

Given that there was a ladder pressed against a tall tree and pruners almost right near her body, you made the reasonable assumption that she’d fallen. The shock dimmed a little in order so that you could think, and you kneeled over to check her for a pulse, but came to the heart-stopping conclusion that she was dead. 

You backed away from Giselle. Your heart ached for her, but you couldn’t touch a dead body. The smell of death was foreign and overwhelming and you didn’t know how to keep yourself composed. Finding your bearings, you did what any reasonable person would do after discovering a lifeless body. 

You went to find help. 

It looked like an accident, like she had taken a wrong step and made a fatal mistake, but that didn’t mean you could just leave her there to rot. Somebody still had to call the police. And an ambulance. 

Tears blurred your vision as you ran back to the east wing. You couldn’t believe that Giselle was gone. You didn’t want to believe that. She never let you get too close, but you recognized Giselle for the hard-working woman she was that had her life all too suddenly ripped away from her. 

Fuck, this shouldn’t have happened. Giselle divulged to you about how her family needed her. They survived off of her income, her grueling long hours of hot hard work. 

Your mind couldn’t help but come to the worst possible conclusions. What if she knew too much? She was the first one to mention the piano to you and she seemed to be in denial about something. 

No, that’s ridiculous. There’s no way the monarchy would kill a devoted worker for keeping their filthy secrets, especially from their newest addition. She’s been inadvertently doing them a favor. 

Then again, someone was guaranteed to keep a secret if it died with them. Still, there was no evidence that her untimely death and the piano’s curse was even remotely linked together. You saw the scene yourself. It looked like an accident, not a crime. 

That made you remember what Jungwoo told you in the cellar about the deaths and disappearances. About how anybody who touched the piano either died mysteriously or disappeared without a trace. 

You had no way of knowing for sure if Giselle ever touched the piano, but if she was a victim of sound, as Jungwoo put it, that should’ve somehow placed a target on her back. And yours. You shuddered at the thought. 

Spooky sounds meant contact with the piano. You had done more than touched it. You’d played it. Almost every night for weeks. Jungwoo mentioned to Jaehyun that he didn’t hear the sounds, but he never told you if he touched the piano, either. 

But if his father had, then knowing what Jungwoo knew, you doubted that he would. 

Whatever it was, nothing made it easier to cope. Pictures of blood kept flickering behind your eyelids whenever you blinked. Your sobs echoed off the hallway walls with your hurried footsteps, but noticing the double doors finally come into view, you tried to pull yourself back together. 

You subconsciously sighed out in relief when you got there, but when you came to draw it open, the hands refused to budge. “Fuck!” you cursed out. 

Not that anybody would hear you. There was music thumping beneath your feet even outside the door and it would’ve done you no good to knock. It was strange that the door was locked, though. Now that you thought about it, there also weren’t any guards in the hallways. 

But there was another entrance through the back. 

Ten, you thought, already running again. Your legs ached from sprinting in heels, but somebody needed urgent medical attention. And Ten had a cellphone. 

The kitchen entrance luckily wasn’t too far from where you already were and you came prepared to charge through the doors, but those, like the others, were also locked. You started to bang tirelessly on the door, yelling with complete vigor, “Ten, open the door! Someone needs help!”

There was no answer. You tried to beat harder, to scream louder, but every effort seemed useless. With your voice turning hoarse, that glass of water you left inside the kitchen suddenly sounded tempting. 

“What the fuck,” you grumbled under your breath, exhausted and confused and in shock. You needed to lie down, but you refused to rest until help was on the way. 

Why would Ten suddenly leave? Dinner couldn’t have even been ready yet. You didn’t know why he tagged along with his dad sometimes, but you did know that they came and went in the same 

vehicle. 

There was a door just to your left, one that led outside where Ten’s father would’ve parked. You immediately made a beeline for it, curious if they were gone. It was the only way you could rationalize the locked door and Ten’s absence. 

You hoped to see somebody out there, and you did, but they weren’t breathing. 

The chef was on the ground where he usually took his smoke breaks, bleeding as if he was torn from every seam and had been ripped open from every angle. You gaped, fixing a hand to your mouth as you wobbled in surprise, gripping the nearest wall for purchase. 

Turning away from him, you heaved for breath and tried to keep your stomach's contents inside where they were. But there was blood splattered everywhere you looked. And if you thought the stench was overpowering earlier, you were in for the wildest ride of your life. 

This death said loud and clear everything that Giselle’s didn’t. This was no mistake. Matter of fact, this scene was so messy that it couldn’t have not been done deliberately. 

“Oh my god,” you rasped, unsure of what to say. And what to do. Never had you seen a dead body outside of a funeral backdrop and having seen not one, but two very dead people was seriously wounding your ability to think. 

All you knew was that something was fishy. You thought Giselle’s death was a self-inflicted mistake, but you weren’t so convinced anymore, all things considered. This was the second body to wash up, metaphorically speaking. And this one had been undeniably murdered. 

There was a serial killer on the loose. 

Your first thought was Jaehyun and you started to panic, but you consoled yourself with the reminder that he had an entourage of loyal servants to protect him with their lives and shield him with their bodies. He was okay. Giselle and Ten’s father, on the other hand, not so much. 

Speaking of Ten, you still had no clue where he was or what he was doing. For all you knew, he could’ve been the killer. 

No. There’s no way. Ten didn’t have a mean bone in his body, much less a murderous one. Plus, what would he have against Giselle?

And why would he kill his own father?

I don’t know. None of this makes sense. I don’t know why anyone would hurt Giselle or the chef, or anyone for that fucking matter, you huffed, angry. These people didn’t deserve to die. The person responsible would pay. 

Unable to withstand the stench, you pinched your nose and turned for the door. Of course, it would be the only one unlocked. You had the misfortune of seeing what was behind lucky door number three. 

Back in the halls, you only walked aimlessly. You had no idea where the fuck you were going and it was probably a terrible idea to be out and about with an anonymous blood-hungry murderer on the loose, but you weren’t thinking that far. 

Images continued to flicker in your head. You wondered what were the last things these people saw before they died, if they knew what they had coming. And you realized what a shame it was that everything these people knew died the second they took their last breaths. 

You couldn’t wrap your head around this happening. And you wanted to know why. With the chef’s murder, accidents were completely out of the window, and you thought about the piano again. But that made even less sense. 

What business would the chef have with the piano? You doubted that man had ever strayed further than the dining hall. 

Your thoughts traveled even further. Giselle was a gardener. The bulk of her work happened outside and there was hardly any need for her to come indoors when all the tools for her job could be found in the shed. 

More than ever, you needed answers, and more than ever, they seemed impossibly difficult to come by. 

The further you traveled down the hallway, the louder the sound of jagged breathing grew until it finally snapped you out of your biohazard of thoughts. You stiffened with alarm, body alert, and realized it might’ve been in your best interest to locate a useful weapon. 

You ducked behind a corner, not wanting to be caught like a helpless damsel in distress if it was the killer (though only a lousy one would’ve been so noisy), but you heard a groan and knew in your heart that you recognized that voice. 

Peeking around the corner ever so slightly, you noticed Ten clutching his stomach and clinging to a wall for dear life, sticky with hot sweat. And you discerned that he was no threat. 

“Ten,” you called out, approaching him with concern. “What’s wrong? Did someone hurt you?”

Ten shook his head, only barely keeping himself standing. You came to grab him and noticed he was burning up a thousand degrees, helping him slowly sit on the floor. “I told you. That stew gave me the business.”

“This isn’t just a stomach ache, Ten. I think you were poisoned,” you said, crouched down to be eye level with him. 

Ten forced a smile even though he was clearly uncomfortable and in a lot of pain. “Yeah, you’re telling me. But my father was the only one controlling the food. He wouldn’t do that to me.”

The mention of his father made your shoulders stiffen. You scanned Ten’s face, wondering if you should’ve told him what you knew. If he was still alive by the end of this, he would find out one way or another. “Ten, have you seen your dad?”

“I know he’s dead.” 

You cocked him a glance. “You don’t sound disappointed.”

“Do I sound like I’m in a lot of pain?” Ten asked. 

“You sound like you’re trying to keep yourself whole.”

“That’s because I’m kinda dying here. I’m sorry if I’m bad at multitasking,” Ten hissed, paling on the spot. 

Your gaze turned apologetic. “Listen, I’m sorry,” you whispered quietly, glancing around the hallway for suspicious onlookers. “I’ve found two dead bodies and I’ve been running all over the palace looking for help. Please, don’t be the third.”

“Trust me, I don’t wanna be any more than you want me to be…,” Ten trailed, wincing. “Holy fuck. Holy fucking shit. I’m gonna die.”

“Don’t say that!” you screamed. 

Ten threw his head back and groaned, “Babe, I feel like my guts are being ripped open, and not in a good way.”

You wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. Ten was good at keeping the mood as light as it could be as he literally died right before your eyes. And there was nothing you could do to save him. You felt helpless. 

“We’ve got to find help,” you told him, grabbing his hands in yours. 

Ten shook his head. His skin was glistening with a thick layer of sweat and each of his breaths sounded labored. “I can’t move. The room feels so hot. I think I’m gonna pass out.”

He looked like it, too. Tears threatened to fall from your eyes, but you fought them back. At the very least, if Ten was going now, he wouldn’t go alone. “Ten, somebody did this to you. You already said your father wouldn’t. Somebody else had to be in the kitchen.”

Ten shrugged weakly. “So many people went in and out of the kitchen. I don’t even know their names. It could’ve been anyone.”

You released a shaky breath. That answer helped no one. 

Ten’s eyes started to flutter and you shook him in your arms, begging, “No, please don’t close your eyes on me. You’re a fighter. Fight.”

“I’m fighting,” he whispered, voice on the verge of silence. “But sometimes we just lose.”

“I can’t lose you, too,” you cried, trembling as you held him. For as long as he was there, breathing and talking to you, you wouldn’t let him think that he was alone. 

Ten shook his head. You knew he had given it his all, because Ten wasn’t the type to go down without a fight, even if he didn’t win in the end. He’d never let someone else claim a peaceful victory. “If I die right now, I want you to know it’s been a pleasure knowing you.”

“Ten…,” you said. Tears made your eyes burn now. You were clenching your fists so hard his hands were probably sore. 

“They might come for you. Don’t surrender. Whoever this guy is, you give them hell until you can’t anymore.”

A lone tear finally slipped past your cheek. “What if I don’t make it?”

“Then you die knowing you did absolutely everything you could to stay alive,” Ten whispered with the last of his strength. 

Your heart was bursting with sadness and unadulterated rage. To watch somebody in their final moments was different than imagining it unfold. This made it even more real. This was a picture you would never forget even in death. 

Finally, Ten’s strength gave out, and you lingered there for a minute even after. Your thumb pressed to his wrist and you noted that he still had a weak pulse. 

You nodded your head. That was enough for you. But you had to find help immediately. 

And you absolutely had to find out who was responsible for this. They would have a brutal punishment. 

You wiped the tears from your eyes and started to run again, but you didn’t get far before you collided into Jaehyun’s chest, and you released a breath of relief when you saw him. “Oh my goodness, Jaehyun. Thank god it’s you. I’ve been trying to get help for ages. Two people are dead and I think Ten’s on his way out.”

Jaehyun’s voice was unbothered. “Really?”

You realized then that the night was far from over. 

You pulled back, suspicious. You just told him that two people had died in his castle. He should’ve been fuming. “Why do you sound so nonchalant?”

Jaehyun’s lips were in a line. “I warned you not to go looking too deep. You should’ve listened like a good girl.”

The realization was starting to settle in, but you didn’t want to know the truth. You didn’t even want to fathom it. For so many weeks, you’d been unknowingly wallowing in ignorance. “This is your fault. You did this, didn’t you?”

“Yes. All of it was me,” Jaehyun said, like he was proudly boasting about his murders. 

You shook your head. You knew there was something going on, something that your husband was at the heart of, but not like this. “Ten’s dying.”

Jaehyun looked and sounded completely indifferent, “Okay, that’s dramatic. He shouldn’t be dead. He’s in for a solid nap, though. And a concussion if he hit the ground too hard.”

That didn’t happen. You had been the one to personally lower Ten to the ground. Either way, you were none too pleased. You weren’t sure if that was supposed to be reassuring, because Jaehyun’s tone was empty and his face was borderline inscrutable. 

Your whole body felt weak. The room was spinning. Your own body was on the brink of collapse. 

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Jaehyun commented, studying your appearance. You probably looked like you had actually run a marathon. 

“You’re a monster,” you snapped, brimming with loathing and hatred. 

Jaehyun didn’t flinch. “It’s been said,” he told you, like it was only a regular insult to him. 

You shook your head. This couldn’t be happening.

Jaehyun took a step closer to you, and you took twice as many back. You wanted to be nowhere near him. This wasn’t the Jaehyun you knew. He was cold. Alternatively, maybe this was the Jaehyun you’d known all along, the one you’d tried to suppress. 

Your mind was showing you the warning signs. She was giving you all the right signals. And yet, you were blind to each of them. 

Jaehyun tilted his head, looking at you with fucking nothing. There was nothing in his eyes. Nothing on his face. “Do you believe in happy endings?”

“Not with you in it,” you seethed, convulsing with a newfound anger you never thought you could possess, much less direct towards your husband. 

Jaehyun snickered for the first time since you’d last seen him. “I’m giving you the chance to have yours.”

You glared at him, wary. “What does that mean?”

“It means that you have thirty minutes to leave this castle and have your happy ending without me, but if I catch you before then, you’re mine. It’s like hide and seek.”

You wanted to rage. This man had the audacity to play fucking games with you when so many lifes were gone and many more were probably at stake. There was no telling who else he’d hurt. “When do my thirty minutes start?”

“Right now.”

You left then and there. You couldn’t stand to be in proximity of Jaehyun for another fucking second. And he didn’t follow. He was letting you think that you had a chance. 

When you turned the corner, safely out of his vision, you could finally acknowledge the beaten and battered condition of your heart. The look Jaehyun had given you only moments ago was unlike any other you’d ever seen. It was colder. 

You should’ve seen it coming. Jaehyun was the missing piece. This was all happening because of his grandfather’s piano, for fuck’s sake. The same grandfather whose birthday happened to be today. Of course, it wasn’t a coincidence that bodies started dropping that same day. 

You were angry. You were hurt. To be honest, you were just the right amount of everything. And yet, you were thinking about how madly you were still in love with Jaehyun. 

Wincing your eyes closed, you wished that this was just a nightmare like everything else. That you would wake up in Jaehyun’s arms and he'd tell you that it was all a bad dream. Unfortunately, the longer the night went on, the more you accepted that that couldn’t be farther away from the truth. 

The only real difference was that Jaehyun wasn’t right on your tail. He was giving you an opportunity to escape and free yourself from this hellhole once and for all. Your shoulders suddenly felt cold when you recalled something that he’d told you.

I would never chase you, Jaehyun had said. I will always have you right where I want you.

The statement made you feel uneasy then, but you overlooked it, because you wrongfully assumed that Jaehyun was harmless. 

You shook the thoughts away. He wasn’t worth thinking about right now. Survival was your top priority and escaping was the only way you’d ever know peace. 

The palace had a grand total of four entrances stretched across its acres - the main gate, the east entrance, the south entrance, and the west entrance. Only the east entrance was nearby. You knew Jaehyun wouldn’t have made this easy, but it wouldn’t hurt to try. 

You hurried to the nearest exit leading outdoors and breathed only a little easier when you were met with the fresh, crisp night air. Given that you’d been running in heels for what felt like hours, you finally ditched them near a bush and started to run again. 

Traveling to the gate would take forever without a car. The same could be said about the rest of the castle, far from tiny, and you only had thirty minutes on the clock.

You had to make every minute count. 

You wanted to sob, but you focused solely on getting the fuck out of there. You hadn’t forgotten about Ten, but you couldn’t help him here. Jaehyun had apparently taken mercy upon him, sparing his life where he hadn’t hesitated to steal others. 

Why? Was it some kind of reflection of control? Did he realize that Ten wasn’t the root of his need to kill?

Whatever that was. 

“Too much is going on right now,” you whispered to yourself, heart thudding quicker.

For a second you wondered if the other staff you cared for was alright. These were people you saw everyday, working from dusk till dawn, and yet still treated you with respect and kindness. Their sweetness deserved to be spread, not eliminated and forgotten. 

Giselle was gone and had no hope for revival, but as far as you were concerned, Jungwoo was still skipping around with a burden of secrets on his shoulder. Part of you couldn’t bring yourself to fully trust him, not after his disaster of a meeting of Jaehyun, but that didn’t mean he should’ve died. 

Apparently, you and Jaehyun weren’t on the same page. The worst part was that you couldn’t even begin to fathom what he got out of slaughtering his employees like animals. You’d never been able to see inside his head. 

The east gate came into view and you circled in on it, desperate to make an escape. You briefly considered the possibility of Jaehyun being nearby, potentially having taken a closer exit, prepared to hinder you by any means necessary. 

But when the gate refused to budge like you feared, you came to the conclusion that he was definitely far away. Jaehyun was five steps ahead of you. 

He had all of the advantages in this twisted game, you realized. Jaehyun grew up in this palace; he obviously had to know all of the ins and outs, every nook and cranny. It would take you, on the other hand, the entire thirty minutes to navigate from one end of the place to the other. 

This game was never created to be fair. You remembered him showing you little shortcuts along the palace to make your trips shorter. If you wanted to survive, you’d have to fight for your life. 

“Fuck,” you groaned under your breath. You had no way of telling for sure how much time had passed, but if you had to guess, at least ten minutes. 

The sky was dark and mistier than it was earlier. At least it felt that way. The tears stinging your eyes made it even harder to see and you were inching closer to succumbing to the battle. If Jaehyun had rigged it from the start, you knew there was no way in hell you were getting out. 

But Ten’s words rang out in your brain. He was alive for now, but as far as he knew, they could’ve been his final ones. And you knew you couldn’t give up yet.

Mustering the courage to continue fighting like Ten would’ve, you remembered something. There was an emergency exit near Jaehyun’s grandfather’s room. You didn’t care to know why. Bad things just seemed to happen when he was involved. 

Without a second thought, you headed back inside. If you wanted out, you didn’t have a choice. 

Your sanity fought for control against your pumping adrenaline and you came to accept that it wasn’t possible for both to coexist with each other. One or the other. And if you were up against a sicko like Jaehyun, you needed to fight fire with fire. 

You had to degrade yourself to his level, meet him where he was at. You had to become you at your worst version. A hell-raising monster with a thirst for blood. 

There was a familiar ground nearby when you approached the door. The part of the garden you never wandered into, because it was the same place that godawful dream happened. With the pond and stone galore.  

You quickly swiped a pitchfork, throwing it over your shoulder, and when you were finally through the door, started sprinting back down the hallways. The emergency exit was all the way in the west wing and you had less time than you would’ve liked to make it the hell out of there. 

Every bone in your body ached, but you had too much to fight for. You didn’t even know what all was at stake if Jaehyun won, but you didn’t want to know, and you couldn’t sleep beside him at night anymore knowing who he was and what he’d done. 

Turning each corner, you looked around for signs of a lingering Jaehyun before you kept going. Every hallway looked exactly the same as the one that came before it and it made you feel like you were walking in circles, impossible to tell if you were even going anywhere. It was thrusting you far past the brink of madness. 

Minutes passed, but courtesy of the painful yet handy adrenaline rush, it felt like seconds when you found the west wing stairs. Taking the elevator would’ve been a quicker option, but if Jaehyun was nearby, he would know if the elevator was preoccupied, and you had no interest in playing russian roulette with your life. 

But there was a familiarly pungent smell in the air. 

You wanted to be sick when you saw the source. The others were messy, but this death was brutal in ways you had never witnessed. Jungwoo’s remains were perched on the stairs within a pool of nauseating blood, sitting in his own overkill. 

His insides were definitely on the outside. Matter of fact, they were everywhere, decorating a number of steps. Jungwoo was savagely mangled and mutilated, similar to how a wolf would ravage an elk, like his killer wanted there to be little to nothing of him left. 

“Jungwoo,” you gasped in shock, crouching down as your legs started to tremble. 

His dead body was on display. Like the person who killed him wanted you to see what they’d done. And you couldn’t bring yourself to accept that Jaehyun was the reason why.

All the skepticism you had towards him devolved into regret. Of course, Jungwoo wasn’t to blame for any of the wicked stuff happening in the shadows. Like his father, he was a victim. And at the end of the day, like you, all he wanted was answers. 

There was a weight on your chest and an unbridled rage spiraling inside your heart. “I’ll find them for you,” you whispered vengefully. 

Then, you heard it. Scratching in the walls stretching near the stairway. In spite of the several claims of their existence, you’d never heard them until now. Soon after, you could’ve swore you heard a familiar voice. 

Jaehyun. He was in the fucking walls? 

Stepping around Jungwoo’s bloody corpse, careful not to step your bare feet in any stray specks of blood, you headed upstairs with a sparkling revolve keeping your blood pumping. The emergency exit was close. 

It was actually right down the hallway. When you were walking from the bedchamber with Jaehyun, the journey felt longer, but you ignored every glare from those evil statues and came right in front of the emergency door. 

After yanking the knob, it begrudgingly opened and you stepped inside without a moment of consideration. There was no time. Do or die. 

The door closed behind you on its own terms. You just kept pushing. This was your only ticket to escape and though you weren’t exactly sure where the path led, you had no intention to stop and fret about your whereabouts. It was worth nothing though, that the deeper you came, the more it felt like a secret passageway. 

The hallway didn’t look the way you pictured an escape route. The walls were accessorized with portraits and lights. And you couldn’t believe your shock when you saw it diverge into different paths like a crossroad. 

This fucking was a secret passageway. 

There was something else you noticed. Those scratches sounded closer than they had when you were outside, like somebody dragging their nails onto the walls as they walked. 

“What the fuck?” you wondered. 

You stiffened when you heard your husband’s voice, “Darling, is that you? Your thirty minutes are over.”

Nope. Silent as ever, you made for the other path. You were picking your battles. 

Jaehyun was probably closer to the way out of here after all. He would’ve never given you a free opportunity. He was probably guarding the escape just in case you were clever (or lucky) enough. 

His footsteps were slow. You couldn’t see him, but you could hear him, and he was in no particular hurry to catch you. You worried that you were walking into a dead end, but when you came out on the other side, there was another set of doors. 

Your eyes flickered between them. You had time to waste before Jaehyun even got anywhere close to you, but you wanted to get ahead. After a moment of carefully contemplating, you made the nerve-wracking decision to go for the right. 

When you stepped out, you found yourself right back where it all began. You were outside, but not as far as you would’ve liked. It was the gardens. You glimpsed around and saw the tree you wed Jaehyun under. 

Though it had been full of white flowers the day you exchanged vows, promising each other eternity, they had unfortunately succumbed to the drier air. 

“That was a fun day, huh?”

Your startled body jolted with alarm and the usual ease that filled you when you realized it was only Jaehyun behind you was nowhere to be found. He was the evil you’d been searching for, hiding in plain sight. 

He had you fooled. He made you think that he was somebody he wasn’t. Worst of all, you believed him. You trusted him, completely and utterly. You were willing to give him all of you at the drop of a dime. 

“Stay back. I’ll hurt you,” you threatened, posing the pitchfork in your sweaty hands. 

Emotion flickered over Jaehyun’s face; amusement. “A pitchfork? That’s really medieval, don’t you think?”

Your tone darkened, “I’m warning you.”

Jaehyun stepped closer, leaving himself open and vulnerable. “Then, do it. I’m right here. I have no weapon,” he said, holding his hands above him. 

Panic settled in. It occurred to you that your feelings for Jaehyun would never let him hurt you unless your own life was threatened, and for some reason, you believed that Jaehyun would never hurt you. He had all of the opportunities. Yet he had never a finger on you. 

Plus you still needed answers. For yourself, and for the people whose lives were taken because of them. Tears stinging your eyes again and a shattering echoing out in your heart, you tossed the pitchfork aside and roared, “I hate you!”

“That isn’t true,” Jaehyun said, gentle and tender. His voice was loving, but his eyes were soulless. “You love me. I make you happy.”

You shook your head vigorously. “I’ve spent the past couple of hours in distress, all because of you. Why? What’s really going on, Jaehyun?”

“At the end of the day, the piano calls, and I answer. The responsibility skipped my father, but it’s what my grandfather did. I didn’t have a choice,” Jaehyun said, wholly convinced that this was some god-given obligation. 

And you were having none of it. It was just excuses. “That doesn’t make sense. You killed all of those people because of a fucking piano?”

“This is why I couldn’t tell you. I knew that you wouldn’t understand. You have to live it to know.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” you seethed, stepping away from him.

Jaehyun didn’t follow. He was comfortable standing there and watching you, because he knew you had nowhere to run. “This isn’t a regular piano. It hands out curses like candy. It’s an entity and to prevent itself from being destroyed, it chooses its protectors.”

The whole world was spinning. Was he trying to tell you that the piano was alive or something? 

“He was the chosen protector - my grandfather, I mean. Like I said, it skipped my father and went to me. The piano gives anyone that touches it one of two curses to protect itself. I only enforce that fate.”  

The world around you was starting to blur. Jaehyun didn’t see those corpses as people. Instead, he saw them as curses that needed to be removed. 

Standing required too much extra strength that you didn’t have. You stumbled and staggered, weakening by the second, and when you started to head for the ground, Jaehyun caught you in his strong arms. “Careful. You might get hurt.”

He was perfectly composed while everything as you knew it was falling apart, piece by fucking piece. Glancing into his eyes, you hissed, “What are the curses?”

“Hm?”

“You said that when someone touches the piano, they get one of two curses. What are they?”

“Death,” Jaehyun said as normal as ever. “Or perpetuity. They have to live their worst fear until the day that they croak.”

You didn’t think that you could get any angrier, but that didn’t even begin to describe the sharp pain heating your whole body up to hell. “You let me touch that piano, you encouraged me to, knowing I would immediately be cursed.”

Jaehyun saw where you were going with this and replied coolly, “If I knew you were going to die, I would’ve kept you away from it.”

“So you knew I would’ve been cursed with perpetuity,” you said in an accusing tone. “Meaning you knew my biggest fear.”

“I might’ve exploited my power. Your every nightmare revolves around me. You’re so scared of me it keeps you awake at night. I had to use that to my advantage. I can’t lose you.”

And there it was. The ugly truth on a silver platter. Jaehyun gave you the creeps and instead of trying to prove his innocence to you, he took advantage of your fear, making sure to create a reality where you would never be able to get rid of him for as long as you both breathed.

This was the end. Glancing at the tree where you exchanged vows only earlier this spring, you realized that everything pointed back to Jaehyun. It always had. 

Pulling back from Jaehyun, because you couldn’t stand to touch him, you snapped, “You didn’t chase me, because you knew that in the end, everything led back to you.”

Jaehyun didn’t deny it, chuckling. Like he thought that he was clever. “Why would I chase you when I’ve already bound you to me?”

You physically felt weak and sick. You didn’t want to believe that Jaehyun had somehow manipulated your fate so that you couldn’t leave him. Your only escape was through death. Every shaky exhale you took ached. 

Jaehyun continued, “That’s why your little dreams don’t make sense. It doesn’t matter how far or quickly you run away from me. I will always catch you without trying. I always get what I want and you’ll never slip through my fingers. You’re mine.”

At those words, you wobbled away, but it was more like a vicious drawback. “You killed Giselle and Jungwoo and Ten’s father. Why?”

Like he was incapable, there wasn’t a lick of remorse in Jaehyun’s voice when he replied, “I put Giselle out of her misery. She had the perpetuity curse. No matter how hard she worked, she was going to be doomed to her worst nightmare for the rest of life - dying poor. I only made it happen sooner. It was quick.” 

You felt like regurgitating yesterday’s lunch the longer this conversation happened, but you held it back. 

“Jungwoo had it coming. He didn’t have the curse, unlike his father, but it was obvious that he had a thing for you and it was disgusting. I honestly did him a favor. He doesn’t have to live in pain anymore.”

Had a thing for you? You never got that vibe from Jungwoo. He was polite and respectful, and you treated him likewise. You never thought you would get a man killed for his manners. 

“And the chef,” Jaehyun began, pleasure flickering onto his face for the briefest of seconds, but you swore it was there. “He was just practice and a victim of opportunity. It’s been a minute. I’m rusty.”

“You killed him for no reason,” you spat. 

“It appears that way.”

Your body recoiled with every unpleasant feeling it had to offer. “You killed Jungwoo for no reason, too. He was just a nice guy,” you said through gritted teeth. 

It was like the angrier you got, the calmer Jaehyun stood, taking every one of your metaphorical hits like they were a gentle nudge to the shoulder. “I killed him out of love for you. He wanted what was mine. I had to remind him of his place. He was a nobody.”

Turning away, you decided that you couldn’t look at Jaehyun any longer. You couldn’t believe the words coming out of his mouth. You were upset and disappointed and everything in between. 

Jaehyun’s eyes were fixed to that goddamn tree. “I had no feelings for you at first. Marrying you was just another duty I knew I had to fulfill for my country. It was business. But then we started to get to know each other, and I fell for you.”

“I had feelings for you too,” you croaked, voice shaking with pain. 

Jaehyun was quick to add, “You still do. Don’t you see what I did for you? I turned you into royalty.”

“I never fucking asked you to,” you screamed off the top of your lungs. Letting the whole palace hear you for all you cared, if anybody was still alive in there. “I married you because it was what my parents wanted. I just happened to actually like you for a minute.”

“You’ll come around,” Jaehyun said nonchalantly, unfazed by your aggression. “You’ll realize that you were made for me. And you’ll accept that our love was written in the stars.”

There were no stars when you glanced into the night sky. Not even a sliver of the moon. Even she was too ashamed of what was happening under her nose right now and couldn’t bear to witness it unfold. 

But it dawned on you then. The only time you would ever see the moon and her stars again was if you stepped onto the grounds of this very garden. Jaehyun had caught you. You waltzed straight into his trap and now you had to reap what you’d sowed. 

You were his. Whether you liked it or not. You might’ve not ever given up on escaping him, even if it took a lifetime, but for right now, Jaehyun had won. 

“Let’s go, baby,” Jaehyun said, wrapping an arm around your waist. You shuddered. His hands were cold to the touch. “It’s late. We should get ready for bed. We have to stop by the piano so that you don’t have bad dreams.”

The walk to Jaehyun’s grandfather’s bedchamber was quieter than it had ever been. You kept him at arm’s length, ashamed. And maybe a little fearful. 

And there the piano stood in its glory when the door opened, untouched and unmoving. She was evil as ever, wallowing in her curse. Your fingers ran across the keys as the curse wrecked through your blood, present and constant. 

“I’ll never forgive you for this,” you whispered, glancing up at Jaehyun. 

For the first time in a minute, Jaehyun smiled. He replied sweetly, “Darling, it’s okay. You’ll understand soon. We only have each other now.”

You didn’t want to know what that meant. Instead, you pressed your fingers to the bitterly cold keys, squeezing your eyes closed as you played a melody by heart.

Finally, tears started to fall down, gathering on the keys. Then, you realized that you weren’t a victim of sound, but an indulger. Your body was there, but your mind was with nature. With the blowing wind and gentle breezes, the rippling water and swimming critters. 

Your mind was with your friends. With Giselle in the garden, helping her trim branches and plot plants for the queen. With Jungwoo, exploring new places around the palace that you never knew existed. With Ten, rambling about anything and everything under the sun. 

You escaped through every harmonious noise, fingers pacing ruthlessly, and keeping your eyes closed as you pretended that everything was okay. 

Jaehyun came behind you, resting his head on your shoulder while his arms came around you again. His touch was familiar and though it used to keep you whole, when you sat there, defenseless and helpless, you could feel a piece of you break off and die in his arms. 

Something He Likes (M) pt. 1

The first part of the eighth and final part to the Pathetic series

Summary: Jeonghan and y/n are finally together. But what does being together mean for them?

This part is 31k which was too much for tumblr???? Because it was over 1000 blocks??? So it's split into two parts being released at the same time IM SORRY. Alexa play Hate Rodrigo by Yena

Warnings: Dubcon as always, let’s do this one more time: dom!jeonghan, sub!y/n, masochist!jeonghan, sadist!yn, lots of public play and I mean a lot okay, Jeonghan is a tease, degradation, dacryphilia, creampies, slight teeny tiny breeding kink if you squint at one part, pet play??? Like it’s not but he calls her a bitch and makes her bark idk what you want me to call that, cunnilingus, fingering, rough sex, mean!jeonghan, references to y/n being a toy and other demeaning things in a sexual manner (but like at this point we all know this right), praise!kink if you squint, the l-bombs in this one are crazy, jealousy from both sides, possessiveness from both sides, unprotected sex as always, bimbification? (yn is fucked dumb)

-

This is part one of the eighth part of the pathetic series:

It felt weird to be standing at the door of Alpha Mu in daylight… Okay, you had been here in daylight before but it still felt wrong. You weren’t sure if it was because you didn’t really belong in a frat house, or if it was because now you were dating Jeonghan and that was weird to say.

You stared at the door, knowing from experience that what you needed to do was just to open the door. But… It was your first time coming here as a girlfriend… It just felt wrong to do so.

“Two times in a row.”

You were startled out of your thoughts by the unfortunately distinct sound of Seungcheol’s voice. You turned around, an embarrassed expression spread over your face, but Seungcheol just gave you half a smile.

“I just…” Your words died on your lips. Seungcheol’s smile grew a little bit, and he brushed past you, pushing the front door open. You watched him step in, your mouth momentarily going dry as he just left it open for you. He walked a few steps into the hallway, kicking his shoes off.

“Jeonghan, you left her outside again,” he called. You resisted the urge to hit Seungcheol and instead rushed into the frat house, kicking your shoes off and closing the door behind you. When you peaked around the door Jeonghan was on the floor surrounded by legos (as per usual).

You two caught each other’s eyes immediately and his lips fell into a smile that was mostly in his eyes. Your heart jumped in your chest at the expression, and you felt yourself stopping right next to Seungcheol who had stopped just inside the living room.

He looked at you and sighed shaking his own head.

“Look at her,” he commented gesturing to you. “This is the face of a psychology major who is going to leave you if you aren’t careful.”

Jeonghan’s smile didn’t waver, but his eyes flickered briefly down to his hands. He set down a chunk of lego bricks, watching you for your reaction to Seungcheol’s words. You glanced back over at Seungcheol, giving him a pressed smile.

“It’s like Jeonghan says,” you mumbled. “I don’t mind waiting for him.” You thought over your words for a second. “But it wasn’t his fault that I was standing out there.”

You looked back over at Jeonghan in time to see his eyes flicker over to Seungcheol. The two boys made eye contact, and Jeonghan’s lips flickered up just a tad more.

“She doesn’t mind,” he said, his voice coming out like a brag. His eyes flickered back, and he gestured towards you. “Come here.”

Somehow that was more embarrassing than you saying that you didn’t mind waiting for Jeonghan. You gave a glance to everyone in the room and upon noticing that no one was really paying attention you walked over to Jeonghan, stooping over in front of him. He smiled at you, and raised his hands to your face, pulling you down by your cheeks.

He pulled you close but he didn’t say anything to you. Instead, his eyes narrowed at you slightly, his gaze intensifying. You let him stare at you like that for a few seconds, that ran into a minute, that had your face burning in his hands.

“Jeonghan,” you mumbled softly. He mostly ignored you, his eyes searching your face in a manner that you were starting to become accustomed to. One that was embarrassing enough when you two were alone. More so when you were in a living room full of people. You bit back a frustrated whine. “Jeonghan,” you pressed again. “’s embarrassing.”

Jeonghan’s lips pressed up into a barely there smile and he sighed, a bit overdramatically, letting his hands fall back to his sides.

“Can’t I appreciate my girlfriend in peace?”

Girlfriend. That word certainly was tickling you in a way that you had never imagined it would. You tried to press down the feeling.

“Yeah, in peace,” you replied, your eyes glancing at Seokmin on the couch as you spoke. Jeonghan followed your gaze, his cheeks very briefly puffing up when he realized where your hesitation came from. He sighed, turning his head back to you.

“Fine,” he relented. “In peace.” He smiled and gestured to the legos scattered on the floor. He didn’t have to vocally extend the invitation to sit next to him. You set your bag down and sat cross-legged next to Jeonghan.

He was now fully focused on his legos again, and you watched him for a little as her perused the colorful pieces of plastic. You were only there for a few minutes before your attention was torn away from him.

“Oh y/n.”

You looked up from Jeonghan to see that Jun was standing at the stairs, your lips flickered up into a smile.

“Jun,” you greeted. Jun walked down the last few steps and walked over to you and Jeonghan, plopping himself down in front of you. Jeonghan looked up at him with a small glance, a smile flickering on his face in greeting. Jun mirrored the look before settling his gaze back on you.

“I’m glad you’re here,” he said seriously. “I have a problem.”

You frowned slightly.

“Okay…?”

It wasn’t common that Jun came to you with things. In fact, you and Jun had never really had a relationship like that before. To lump you and Jun into a box without putting Jeongyeon in it too felt wrong. In fact, you thought that your even minor relationship with Jun could be chalked up to pure over exposure to one another.

You saw him with Jeongyeon. You saw him with Jeonghan. But never more than that.

And sure, he was there to give you advice but again if it weren’t for Jeongyeon in the room than you wouldn’t be telling him your issues at all.

So, to hear Jun come to you with a problem. Even though Jeonghan was right there. It was odd.

Jun’s eyes darted to the side, seeming to access his surroundings. You glanced around as well but everyone seemed to be focused on other things.

“It’s just…” He hesitated again, looking down at his hands. When he looked back up, you gestured for him to continue. “I keep getting asked out.”

Your eyebrow rose.

“Asked out?” You asked. He nodded.

“Asked out… By a girl…” He continued. Your eyes flickered behind Jun towards the kitchen where a curious Seungcheol was now peeking out from around the corner. Your attention strayed back to Jun.

“Okay,” you replied. You couldn’t quite read exactly what Jun wanted advice with and yet that seemed to be enough context for Jun. He went silent, reaching forward to grab some of the legos scattered on the floor. He started to separate them into little piles. You would think that you had satisfied him if not for the fact that so far all you had said that wasn’t repetition was okay. You cleared your throat.

“What girl?” You pressed, hoping maybe he would pick up that you didn’t have enough context.

He barely looked at you.

“Yeonwoo,” he replied, almost as if it was obvious. He glanced around and lowered his voice. “She’s one of the prettiest girls in my major.”

Another thought occurred to you, and you leaned back on your hands in disappointment.

“What the fuck even is your major Jun?” You asked.

“I’m in aerospace engineering,” he replied pointedly.

You blinked.

“Aerospac-”

“And Yeonwoo is the top of our class,” Jun interrupted you as if the revelation of his major was nothing. “We are in a class together right now and she started…” Again, he lowered his voice, forcing you to lean forward a little. “She started sitting next to me.”

You had never been this close to Jun before and yet for some reason you still couldn’t hear him. You scooted closer to him, your shoulders brushing, fingers touching.

“And she asked me one day what my favorite kind of coffee was and when I didn’t tell her she told me that she would just… Figure it out herself. And so, she just started bringing me coffee every day.”

Your lips flickered up into a small smile.

“What? That’s so nice.”

Jun still looked troubled.

“She keeps asking to study with me after class,” he continued, as if the addition of that detail should make it more obvious as to why this was so troublesome. “Or inviting me to parties that her friends are throwing.”

Now it was your turn to feel confused. You brushed your hair back distractedly.

“Do you not like her?”

“No, I do like her,” Jun disagreed. “She’s really pretty… And nice…”

“Jun’s never dated anyone before,” Jeonghan commented. Both of you looked up from where your foreheads were practically touching. He gestured towards Jun. “So, he’s nervous about messing it up.”

Jun’s face started to redden a little.

“That’s not-”

“He’s really popular with girls he just never realizes when they are flirting with him,” Seungcheol agreed from the kitchen. Jun whipped his head around to look at Seungcheol.

“Shouldn’t you be cooking?” He blurted, and then turned back around and pointed at Jeonghan’s legos. “And you are getting nowhere with this lego set.”

“Yeah, because you stole my building partner,” Jeonghan mumbled.

“Dating people isn’t something to be so worried about,” Minghao added from where he was sitting across the room. “And if you want advice on something like that isn’t y/n the worst person you could ask?”

Your eyebrows raised.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You asked, turning to look at Minghao, a slight tinge of hurt leaking into your voice.

Minghao raised an eyebrow at you.

“Do I really have to elaborate?” He asked. He didn’t. You bit down on your bottom lip, and as you did so you felt Jeonghan’s hand creeping up on your back. His thumb drew some small circles on your back.

“It’s okay,” he assured. “Minghao doesn’t know anything about dating anyone either.”

He turned around and shot a look at Minghao who rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to his book.

“That’s exactly why I wanted to talk to you about it,” he said to you. “Because… You were scared but you got over it. How did you do that?”

That phrase echoed in your mind in a way that you were a bit embarrassed to admit. You got over it.

Had you gotten over it? You hadn’t been dating Jeonghan for long at all and even as long as you had been dating him it wasn’t like you were dating him…. You two weren’t doing anything different than you had been before.

This was your first time over at the frat house since you two had gotten together and what had you done? Stood in front of the door as if you had never been over there before in your life. Like an idiot. Like somebody who very much had not gotten over it.

Your silence was probably loud to Jeonghan, but it fell on deaf ears with Jun. His eyebrows furrowed at your silence, just waiting for you to go on. Jeonghan nudged you in the side with his shoulder and once again you were reminded of exactly how close you were to Jun. You gave him a small half-there smile and pulled back from Jun.

“You just have to give it a shot,” you replied. “No matter how scared you may feel that’s just… Normal. Pre-relationship jitters. It’s simple, isn’t it? She likes you… You like her. Just go for it.”

You thought your advice was pretty shotty, and you knew that it was almost word for word the advice that people had given you about Jeonghan, but despite all of that Jun nodded, satisfied by your response. Obviously, you had said the right thing.

Silence fell over everyone in the room again and you took the opportunity to scoot back closer to Jeonghan. Once you were close enough to him, Jeonghan let his head fall limp on your shoulder, his eyes still on the legos in his hands. He looked confused as he stared at the lego blocks for reasons you were unsure of.

He seemed… You weren’t really sure what it was but not like himself really. He was being much quieter than usual… Maybe it was just because he was around the others. You nudged him in the side lightly, making his head move a bit on your shoulder, just so that his chin was tilted a bit further up towards you.

“Do you need me to read the instructions out for you?” You asked. Jeonghan silently shook his head against you and his head returned itself to its former position. You were unsure of exactly what he wanted out of you. You hoped that wasn’t what this was always going to be like. You being completely unsure of his intentions or wishes.

It was awkward… Because the others were here but you decided that if Jeonghan wasn’t putting up a fuss about it, and the other boys didn’t care about the very public display of affection you weren’t going to say anything about it either.

Jeonghan started to silently put all of the pieces of the lego set together, shifting every once and a while to get closer to you, or to flip the page of his instruction manual. You weren’t sure exactly how much time passed before Seungcheol came back into the living room from his cooking in the kitchen, but you felt like it had been a while.

Jeonghan had managed to build a few of the walls of his creation, and you had honestly gotten lost in the feeling of having him right there next to you. He was so quiet and calm… His breathing so even. You simply weren’t used to this side of Jeonghan. You weren’t used to him just… Existing beside you.

Seungcheol caught your attention, an eyebrow quirking towards you in your position. It was funny how he was always able to read that about you. Read exactly how you felt about a certain situation. You sent Seungcheol a small smile, but there was panic in it.

How were you actually supposed to act around Jeonghan? You still hadn’t really figured that out.

He liked you for you.

Okay.

The you that he had seen.

You tried to think back over the things that he had seen you do.

He had seen you at parties, and in class, but what had he gathered from those moments? He rarely saw you outside of that. What about you had really caught his eye?

His speech to you in the shower echoed through your mind but even still it was hard to garner… Exactly what he saw in you.

“I don’t think I’m getting much of this done,” Jeonghan said with a sigh. You turned your gaze down towards him a bit more, inclined to just nod slightly. You didn’t think he was getting much done either.

“I can help you more if you want-”

He waved it off and pulled himself off of you.

“That’s okay. I can just finish it another time. He got up to his feet and for a moment you just sat there and watched him before you realized oh, he was leaving the room. You got up to your feet too, giving Seungcheol and Jun a nod of farewell as you followed Jeonghan up the stairs. He walked into his room, and sat down on the edge of his bed, leaving you to close the door behind the two of you.

A smile crossed Jeonghan’s lips.

“Are you not a huge fan of pda?” He asked you lightly. The question caught you off guard.

“What?”

“Well, I just noticed that when it’s just the two of us, I can do whatever I want… Kiss you, play around with you, you don’t really mind,” he commented. “At parties you don’t mind when my hands are all over you but when we’re in front of the boys…”

He trailed off, leaving you to just stand there in front of him with a red face. You decided after a few moments of embarrassing silence to walk over to him. Once again, he reached up to you and pulled you down towards him by your cheeks, pulling you into a deep kiss.

You melted under his touch, placing your hands on his shoulders for better purchase as he practically kissed the breath out of you. As he kissed you, his hands trailed down your cheeks to your neck, the thumbs of his fingers brushing at the roots of your hair as he palms pushed you closer to him, rendering you unable to pull away if you wanted to.

You didn’t mind that, you didn’t want to pull away.

After a few minutes Jeonghan finally pulled away from you to let you breathe, and you both panted as you looked at one another, eyes wide, bodies warm.

“What was that for?” You asked lightly. He just smiled.

“Just testing my theory,” he said lightly. He pulled back a bit, one of his hands raising to pinch your cheek. “You really do get embarrassed over the pda.”

You swatted his hand away from you and plopped yourself down next to him, dropping your face into his shoulder.

“No, I don’t,” you mumbled. He hummed.

“Right,” he agreed lightly. “You definitely don’t. Not even a little. Just like being emotionally vulnerable doesn’t embarrass you.”

You groaned, letting your eyes close in frustration. As you sat there with your head on his shoulder he reached around you, his fingers finding their way to your waist, his fingers dipping under your shirt.

“But you know what really doesn’t embarrass you?” He asked you softly. You glanced up at him, placing your chin on his shoulder, already able to recognize the dark look in his eyes. You swallowed hard and nodded once.

“Y-yes,” you mumbled. He hummed at your words, his fingers pinching your side.

“If you know so well you should show me,” he replied softly. “Show me exactly what you can do that proves that I don’t embarrass you. That you aren’t embarrassed of me.”

“You don’t embarrass me,” you insisted, pushing yourself off of Jeonghan.

“I don’t?” He asked. “Is that why you get so embarrassed when I’m touching you in front of the boys? Because you aren’t embarrassed of me?”

“I’m not-”

“Get undressed,” Jeonghan said, his voice lowering a bit. You swallowed but quickly got to your feet, beginning to pull your clothes off. You knew that recently you had been a brat when you were with Jeonghan, and today? You thought that you would really regret it if you kept up that behavior.

As soon as your last article of clothing fell to the floor Jeonghan was staring at you, leaning back on the palm of his hands.

His gaze may be dark, but there was admiration in his eyes regardless. A small smile graced his lips.

“You’re so perfect,” he mumbled softly. “Your body made just for me huh?”

Your face flushed red, and it made Jeonghan chide.

“There you go again you liar,” he chided. “Clearly being embarrassed because of me. And still you lie.”

“It’s just-” Obviously you were a little embarrassed. Standing there in front of him naked. He was just staring at you with seemingly no urge to do anything. God you really, really hoped that you two weren’t doing this again today. “Jeonghan please I can’t deal with the teasing today.”

He quirked his head a little so that you would come closer to him. You closed the distance between the two of you and he raised his arms, quirking an eyebrow at you. You knew what he was asking without having to hear him say it. You pushed his shirt up over his head and set it aside on the bed, before dropping down to your knees in front of him. You slid his clothes off until, like you, he was completely naked. You swallowed hard when you saw his already hard cock in front of you.

Had you forgotten how big it was? It was like every time you saw it was a brand-new reminder.

That’s not going to fit but it has fit before.

Jeonghan leaned forward, his hand coming to your chin and his thumb pressing to your bottom lip, you obediently opened your mouth, sucking the tip of his finger into your mouth. You were slapped, hard, a gasp ripping from your mouth at the touch, only to be met with a soothing hand on the cheek that he had just hit immediately after.

“Poor little thing, did that surprise you?” He asked you, a fake expression of concern on his face. You pressed your lips firmly together, not really sure what you should say in response to him. That earned you another slap, except on the opposite cheek. “I asked you a question.”

“It only surprised me a little bit,” you blurted out, your hands reaching for Jeonghan’s legs to keep yourself steady. He readjusted his weight a little, his hands threading into your hair.

“Only a little bit,” he said, his tone a little mocking. He pulled your head roughly up by the strands of your hair. You hissed in surprise. “What’s your safe word?”

A quick exclamation of your safe word and Jeonghan was letting go of your hair, but only a second later he had both hands on the side of your head, pushing you down onto his cock. He didn’t try to ease you down on it, and it was when your hands quickly grabbed at Jeonghan’s hips that you could feel the pent-up energy in his body. He wasn’t here to play coy today. He needed to just use you however he wanted to.

You urged yourself to breathe in through your nose as you choked around Jeonghan’s cock. He ignored your chokes in favor of holding your head still and thrusting his hips up into it. His moans were low, little praises leaving his mouth alongside them. His thrusts rough in a way that made spit dribble down your chin, but you didn’t even care. It didn’t bother you at all because all you could think about was how good it was going to feel when he came down your throat and then fucked you like a rag doll…

You tapped on Jeonghan’s thigh, and his grip loosened enough for you to pull off his cock. You gasped for air but that wasn’t why you had asked for a break.

“C-Can, I touch myself?” You stammered. Jeonghan’s light air of concern disappeared instantly, and instead it was replaced by one of pitied amusement.

“Oh, you poor little girl,” he said softly. “So turned on by me fucking your mouth that you need to touch your needy little pussy?”

You nodded, rubbing your thighs together in anticipation. The more time that passed… The more you thought about it, the more desperately you needed to touch yourself.

“Please Jeonghan,” you said lightly. He hummed, and his grip tightened around the sides of your head again, leading your lips back to his cock.

“Sure,” he agreed. “Go ahead.”

He went back to fucking your mouth just as roughly, but this time you let one of your hands snake down to your clit, the other wrapping around your breasts, pinching your tit. You whined as Jeonghan pummeled your mouth so hard you thought your jaw was going to hurt later, but no complaints would be heard from you even if you could vocalize them. It wasn’t long before you were fucking yourself on three fingers at the same speed as Jeonghan was fucking your face.

You could feel pleasure building in your stomach, but you knew that there was nothing you could do but avoid your clit and fight against the upcoming orgasm.

Luckily. You didn’t have to fight it for long. Without warning Jeonghan was coming down your throat. You tried your best to keep it all down, but he did that thing he liked to do to try and get you to misbehave. He pulled you off of his cock suddenly and you choked, but before you could lose it you coughed some of his cum out into the palm of your hands.

You tried to catch your breath, but Jeonghan grabbed your hand that had the spit up cum in it and pressed it against your face, smearing the cum all over your cheeks.

He sighed.

“Still can’t keep all of that cum down,” he said with a disappointed sigh. His thumbed prodded at your chin, and he seemed to admire the way your face looked after having fucked it. You could tell he wasn’t satisfied.

He slapped your cheek, causing you to stumble a little, your fingers digging into his legs. It was embarrassing how quickly that pain morphed into pleasure that went coiling through your body.

You hoped he didn’t hit you again solely because you genuinely thought you were going to come practically untouched if he did.

“Your face wasn’t red enough,” Jeognhan mumbled. He suddenly spit on your face, and before you could really react to it, he was dragging you up by your hair and shoving your face into the carpet of his floor. He slapped your ass until you were struggling to put it up in the air so that he could line himself up with your cunt and push into you.

His cock was already fully hard when he slid into you, and it cause a loud moan to erupt from the both of you. He repositioned himself so that he could press his foot to your cheek, pressing your face harder into the carpet.

“Shut up,” he mumbled and began to fuck you just as roughly as he had been before. Your whole body bounced with each thrust, and this angle would have been uncomfortable if it weren’t for the fact that Jeonghan was so literally using you.

You loved the dirty talk, you loved the teasing, you loved the torture he practically always put you through but the feeling of the carpet on your cheek, and the ball of his foot smushing your cheek made you feel like you genuinely meant nothing to him.

He didn’t care about your comfort, or your pleasure, he didn’t even want to hear your moans. He just wanted to fuck you, use you like a cum dump and move on.

You felt your body shaking and despite the way that your fingers were balled against the carpet to try and prevent yourself from doing this, you could feel yourself coming hard on Jeonghan’s cock. Jeonghan laughed in slight amusement as he felt your body shaking under him.

“God isn’t that embarrassing for you?” He chided. “Coming from sex like this? You’ll get off to just about anything.”

He didn’t say anything more before he was spilling his cum into your pussy. Again, no warning, and when your body twitched, an involuntary (and unwanted) jerk away from Jeonghan, he was pulling you back hard against him, forcing you to take every last drop.

It wasn’t until his cock had fully softened inside of you that he finally withdrew his foot, letting your body contort into a more natural shape. He let go of you and you crumbled to the floor in an exhausted heap, cum still on your face and dripping from your pussy.

For a second, you were reminded of your old partners in the way that Jeonghan seemed to have completely left you there.

But it was only a fleeting thought, a brief second before you felt Jeonghan’s body right next to you. He laid down on the floor next to you, holding a small washcloth that you wondered where he had gotten. He touched the cloth which felt cold against your very warm face.

You groaned as he began to clean the cum and spit off of your face, and you tried to swat him away because wasn’t this the worst part of it. You wondered what he saw when he looked at you after something like this. Did he see you as weak?

“Are you okay?” He mumbled softly. You let your eyes flutter shut, and you nodded silently.

“Was that, okay?” He asked. You had always wondered why he did this. Asked you all these questions after fucking you as if he hadn’t just given you the biggest orgasm and then you realized that maybe this came with what he had been talking about that one time…. Validation.

“I really liked it,” you said softly. You let your eyes flutter open so that he could see the honesty in them. “It felt so good to be used like that… Especially by someone that I trust.” Two more words hung silently in the air. Two words that you felt like you should add but… You didn’t.

“Good,” he murmured softly. “You did really good for me too. You held back an orgasm for so long, didn’t you?”

Your face flushed in embarrassment. Shame at having come without permission, but the shame didn’t last long. Jeonghan pressed a kiss to your lips.

“I love you,” he assured you softly. “Thanks for letting me use you like that. Now… Let’s get you cleaned up and ready to sleep, hm?”

Jeonghan leaned up and tried to get you to come up with him but, you stayed stubbornly in your heap of weak limbs on the floor.

“I’m tired,” you mumbled softly, ignoring the way that Jeonghan was nudging you, clearly trying to get you to get up a little but you still refused to move.

“Y/n, I don’t want to play this game,” Jeonghan said softly. You whined. “Seriously. You’ve got no excuse this time. After care.”

“This borders on abuse,” you mumbled even though it was quite literally the complete opposite of that. You peeked up at Jeonghan’s face and sighed, swinging your feet over the edge of the bed.

“And you’re so stupid when it comes to all of this,” Jeonghan replied. He took you by your forearm to help you to your feet and when you stumbled, he let out a small laugh, tapping your side.

“Hands up,” he said softly. You rolled your eyes but raised your arms so that he could slide a shirt over your head. He tugged it down tightly and sighed happily as he took you in.

“You in my clothes…” He sighed dreamily. “A sight I’ll never get tired of.”

You rolled your eyes.

“Then why’d you buy me all those clothes that one time? Waste of money if you ask me,” you murmured. He laughed again.

“I got legos out of that deal. That’s a win-win in my book,” he insisted. You rolled your eyes again at him.

“I can take a shower myself,” you commented pointedly.

“Okay,” Jeonghan agreed with a nod. “You want me to make you something to eat?”

Your mind flashed back to the last time Jeonghan had cooked for you.

“Define make.”

He rolled his eyes.

“A sandwich. I can’t mess up a sandwich now, can I?”

You supposed he was right about that. “Okay. I’ll come downstairs and join you after a shower.”

“Good.”

You went to step away from Jeonghan but before you could he grabbed your hand and pulled you back to him. He placed both of his hands on the side of your face and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead.

“I love you.”

You gave him a smile back, wondering if you could echo his words, but before you even got the chance he was walking out of the room.

Once you had showered, and Jeonghan had showered, and you two had eaten there was much discourse on whether or not you would stay the night.

“I have to get to class early tomorrow Jeonghan.”

“Okay? I’ll drive you. I want to have you close. At least if I can’t come over let me stay over with you.”

With that option being promptly knocked out of the air you found yourself laying right next to a reading Jeonghan, silence filling the air as the time ticked by. You were enjoying being there. Enjoying just spending time in his space.

But still it was giving yourself time to think.

You propped yourself up on your elbows, your eyebrows furrowing slightly.

“You know what I don’t even really know what kinks you’re into,” you said suddenly. Jeonghan glanced at you from where he was pulling a shirt on.

“Come on,” he said with a roll of his eyes. “You know that’s not true.”

“Not like…” You trailed off in frustration. “Obviously I know some of what you’re into but not like all of it.”

Jeonghan laughed.

“Okay, what else do you want to know?” He asked lightly.

“I want…” You trailed off and pulled out your phone until you got the website that you were looking for. You pressed it into his hands. He hummed in amusement at the site.

“Okay.”

It took him about thirty minutes, and in those thirty minutes you ended up playing on his phone. Something that didn’t bother him even a little bit.

“I don’t want to impede your privacy.”

“Impede all you want. I have no secrets from you.”

You narrowed your eyes at him slightly.

“So, you wouldn’t even mind if…”

He handed you his phone with his text messages open.

“Have a hay day.”

You hadn’t even really intended to go through his messages but none of the games on his phone really interested you. You were pretty deep in the Alpha Mu boys group chat when finally, Jeonghan was clearing his throat.

“Okay. Here are your results,” he said. He handed you your phone and you very quickly dropped his into his hands as well, desperate to see what the test had to say.

Dominant, obviously, masochist, brat tamer… Your eyebrow rose in surprise.

“You’re into bondage?” You asked. “Why don’t you ever tie me up?”

“For the same reason that you rarely see me be a brat tamer,” Jeonghan replied pointedly. “You’re a very good listener.”

As he spoke, he tapped the side of your face with a small smile.

“If I ask you to hold your hands up and for you not to touch, you will hold your hands up and you won’t touch.”

You nodded slowly, a small hum vibrating through your body.

“It’d be easier for me if you did tie me up every once in a while,” you mumbled softly. “Do you even know how hard it is to have the kind of self-control you want me to have?”

A satisfied smile crossed Jeonghan’s lips.

“But you have that self-control,” he said lightly. “And that’s part of why I love you.”

Your eyebrows furrowed just slightly in frustration but before you could say anything Jeonghan was shifting his weight, trapping you between his arms. A strand of his hair fell in his face, a small mischievous smile spread over his lips.

“But if being tied up is what you want…” He trailed off as one of his fingers stroked down your arm to your wrists. “I can make that happen.”

Your stupid face betrayed your emotions as always, turning a deep red.

“I-”

“But only if you wanted to, of course. I can plan it out and everything,” he said, pulling away from you. You took a deep breath that you hadn’t even realized you were holding. You nodded slowly and cleared your throat.

“Yeah, sure. Sounds like fun.”

“You know, if you want to do other things in the bedroom, I would be more than happy to fulfill those desires,” Jeonghan commented. “You don’t have to hide all your secret fantasies from me.”

Again, your face was burning. You laid down in his bed and pulled his covers up over you.

“I’m going to bed now,” you announced. Jeonghan laughed and his hand fell onto your head, giving you a solid few taps.

“Good night y/n. I love you.”

You pressed your lips together, your eyes staring into Jeonghan’s closet.

“Good night, Jeonghan.”

-

Your days with Jeonghan became like that. A pattern that you didn’t think you would ever grow tired of. Sometimes he came over, sometimes you went over to him.

It wasn’t like you two were inseparable. No, you spent time apart. You still studied with Yeongtae, and you mostly slept over at your place when you knew that Jeongyeon was going to be there. But the pattern of just… Spending time with Jeonghan was something you never realized that you would love so much.

Especially not when it came to attending parties.

“Today is the day, I can just feel it.”

You glanced at Yeongtae, your eyebrows raising skeptically as you tugged down your skirt a little bit.

“You’ve really gotta stop obsessing over-”

“Chaeryeong is here,” Yeongtae interrupted. He turned to you. “How do I look?”

You rolled your eyes and patted him on the cheek.

“You look fine,” you said. “If she doesn’t like you like this than… I don’t know Tae maybe you should just give up.”

Yeongtae gave you an annoyed expression and turned away from you without a word, disappearing into the crowd. You sighed and made your way through people until you finally spotted Jeonghan talking to a group of people that (of course) you didn’t recognize.

He didn’t really acknowledge you when you joined him at his side, but his conversation partners did, giving you a small nod of acknowledgement.

“I just don’t really know what I want to do with my linguistics degree,” one of the guys admitted with a shrug. “Sure, I got a minor in teaching English as a second language, but I didn’t need a linguistics degree to do that. It just feels like I would be wasting my degree.”

The talk of degrees intrigued you, in a way that you couldn’t even try to hide. You glanced at Jeonghan to gauge his possible reaction to the mention of this guys’ major wondering if they possibly shared one. You couldn’t tell by looking at his face. Did he suit a linguistics degree?

“That’s not necessarily true,” one of the girls in the conversation commented. “I mean, you would have a better concept of language structure than people without your major. Besides there’s other things you can do with it.”

“You could go into translation,” you piped up. Your class about the psychology of language having coincided a lot with the linguistic major you now had a few friends that were aspiring linguists. “That’s really good for those who are introverts.”

“Translation would be fun, I’m just not good enough at it to go into it,” the guy said with a sigh. “I know so many less languages than my linguistic peers. I feel like I don’t really fit in with them.”

“Oh.”

That was a good point. All the linguists that you knew were pretty fluent in at least three languages. Meanwhile, as far as you knew, that wasn’t the case with Jeonghan. You frowned, slightly frustrated. You had really thought you were getting somewhere with that.

“Well, I’m a history major, and I don’t really know what to do with my degree either,” the girl piped up. She looked at you. “I’m Jiheon by the way.”

“Oh, right,” the guy said. He reached out his hand. “Kibum.”

You smiled and went to take it but just as you did Jeonghan’s arm came to your waist, and he tugged you a little closer to him. He smiled.

“This is y/n,” he said. “My girlfriend.”

Kibum’s face flushed a little and he dropped his hand back to his side. Him and Jiheon shared a glance.

“It’s really nice to meet you,” Jiheon said. “We’ve heard a lot about you. Jeonghan really likes you.”

That seemed to make Jeonghan a little annoyed. His hand slid up under your shirt to your bare back. You hummed.

“I would hope my boyfriend likes me,” you jested lightly. “But you were saying. History major.”

Jiheon nodded.

“Right. I just… Didn’t really think about it going in you know? I love history… It just made sense to become a history major. But what do you even do with that? Teach? Am I going to be a deadbeat history teacher for the rest of my life?”

“Surely there’s more that you can do with it than just become a history teacher,” you said.

“Well.” She sighed and brushed her hair out of her eyes, dragging your attention to that. Her hair. Oh my god, she was beautiful. Wide bright eyes, with her black hair pulled back into a high ponytail with wispy bangs framing her face. Perfect skin. Large hoop earrings. One of the prettiest smiles you had ever seen in your life.

And her outfit? Low-waisted wide-legged jeans, and a tight black crop top. It was the perfect I tried but not that hard look and you were so envious of it.

“I could go into the legal world,” she replied. “Become a paralegal… Believe it or not.”

You hummed and gestured towards her.

“I mean, that’s a good idea,” you said. You bumped Jeonghan with your elbow. “Isn’t that a good idea?”

He gave you a weird look but nodded and smiled at Jiheon.

“Whatever you decide to do with your degree I’m sure it will work out. You’re very smart,” he commented. “And Kibum. Not a lot of languages. Don’t you know four?”

“Not fluently,” he replied, a small pout crossing his lips. Jeonghan rolled his eyes.

“Well, I’m a psychology major,” you commented. “Aiming to be a therapist.”

“Really?” Jiheon asked. “Have you ever thought about psychiatry?”

“In passing,” you replied with a nod. “I mean in a perfect world I could act as both, but I think that therapy is a better long-term solution to mental issues whereas obviously psychiatry can often be more short term.”

“But a faster short-term solution,” Jiheon pointed out. And she was smart too?

“Together a psychiatrist and I could solve a lot of issues for someone mentally ill,” you agreed. “We’ll see where the world takes me. If I don’t think I’m solving any issues I can always change my career.”

You hummed and then gestured to Jiheon.

“How do you two know Jeonghan?”

It was a struggle to ask if Jeonghan was a history major too. Did that suit him? You had never heard him talk about anything historical before.

“We met each other through… Oh who was it…” Jiheon murmured.

“Namjoon, I think,” Kibum said. “Didn’t he change his major like eight times before settling on public relations?”

Jiheon snapped.

“Yes, Namjoon!” She exclaimed. “He’s always throwing these wine parties specifically for socializing because… Public relations and we met there.”

“Wine parties…?” You echoed. Jiheon nodded.

“Who is going to say no to a good bottle of Moscato and a cheese platter?”

You laughed along with her and Kibum. Jeonghan still seemed a bit troubled. His fingers tickled at your back, practically begging you to inch closer to him. You ignored that, unable to imagine what exactly had bothered him about this conversation.

“So, I suppose you two don’t really know where the summer is going to take you?” You asked them conversationally.

“Actually, I am going to be interning at a law firm,” Jiheon commented. “Along with… Oh, Chayoung. Do you know Chayoung?”

“I know Chayoung,” Jeonghan replied with a nod. “Kibum, we met her at that mixer last semester?”

Kibum seemed stumped, as were you. How had you never met all these people that Jeonghan knew?

“Well, you know she’s in law school,” Jiheon continued. “We both got the internship… Thank god. I couldn’t imagine having to do it all alone.”

“I’m just taking a gap between school and work. I’m going to travel. Pick up some random jobs in different countries. Immerse myself in other cultures,” Kibum said.

You hummed, nodding.

You weren’t really sure what you were going to do after graduation honestly. Sure, you had always thought about it, but you didn’t know anything for sure. All you knew was that you didn’t want to stay here forever.

“Jeonghan used to have a pretty clear plan of what he wanted to do,” Jiheon commented. Her attention straying over to your boyfriend. “But from what I’ve heard you’ve changed a lot of your plans.”

A small, knowing smile was crossing her lips, and she teasingly flicked her thumb across his nose.

“All because you finally got the girl,” she said lightly. Your eyebrow rose slightly in surprise, but you tried to cover it with a laugh.

“We haven’t even talked about the future,” you replied. “We’ve only barely been dating.”

“Yeah, but hasn’t Jeonghan been in love with you since freshmen year?” Jiheon asked, her eyebrows raising knowingly. You tried not to look too surprised. You glanced at Jeonghan only to find that he was stunned. “He used to have this plan to… Oh what was it-”

“People change their career plans,” Jeonghan interrupted. “That’s just natural.”

“Yeah, but you did it because you want to fit y/n’s life plan as best as you can,” she replied. Again. Lightly, but confidently. “Do you even know how badly he wants to keep you?”

Jeonghan’s fingers were even more insistent on your back. You liked the touching, but you were a little focused on the conversation at hand.

“Jiheon has a scary talent for reading minds,” Kibum piped up. You gave him a skeptical expression.

“Reading minds?”

“I’m serious, how do you think she knows all that stuff about Jeonghan?”

“Just like I know that…” Jiheon trailed off and leaned close to you, her voice dropping a few degrees. “You haven’t told him you love him yet.”

Your eyes widened. All too telling. Even if you wanted to pretend that wasn’t true… Here it was. Written out all over your face. You glanced at Jeonghan, terrified that he had overheard even though, you were sure that he had noticed your avoidance of those choice three words. He looked a bit confused. No, confirmation that he had heard.

“Lucky guess,” you murmured. She shrugged knowingly, her ponytail falling back over her shoulder.

“Maybe,” she replied. “Or maybe I really do read minds.”

As she spoke, she wiggled her fingers and giggled as if it were all some huge joke. Luckily for you, Kibum was able to turn the conversation away from the topic of Jiheon reading minds and the future and after almost an hour of talking to them and Jeonghan fending off the attention of other girls he decided it was about time to retire back up to his room.

You forced him to stay downstairs a little bit longer so that you could say hi to all the other Alpha Mu boys and check in on Yeongtae who was fawning over a mostly unimpressed Chaeryeong like a puppy. You watched as Jeonghan changed out of his party clothes, looking to be a bit tired.

“Jiheon and Kibum were nice,” you said softly. He hummed his agreeance. “A history major and a linguistics major,” you pressed lightly. “Who all know a public relations major… Does that mean that I can take all of those out of consideration for your major?”

You laughed, and Jeonghan gave you an amused expression.

“Is that what you were thinking that whole time? While I was begging for your closeness. Desperate for your attention, you were worried about figuring out what my major is?”

Your face reddened just slightly.

“I should know these things about you,” you mumbled.

“You’ll figure it out,” Jeonghan said, again writing off your concerns. “Stop worrying so much.”

He rummaged through his things in his closet.

“I bought something for you actually,” he said. You sat so that your legs were swinging off of Jeonghan’s bed.

“Yeah?” You sort of hated when Jeonghan spoiled you. And you were going to say that, but your words died on your tongue when you saw exactly what Jeonghan was spoiling you with. A long strand of pink satin ribbon. You immediately pressed your lips together and tightened your legs.

You two were silent for a moment before you, without any real prompting said a soft I know my safe word. Jeonghan laughed.

“Satin ribbon isn’t really that good for bondage,” he said. He played with the material in his hands a little bit and after a few seconds of silence he raised an eyebrow at you. “Are you just going to sit there with your clothes on? Or are you going to be good and-”

You didn’t even let Jeonghan finish that before you were undressing and once you were naked and sitting on Jeonghan’s bed again he was talking.

“The satin will tighten and there can be some slippage if you struggle…” He trailed off as he approached you, running his hands lightly down your bare arms before resting on your wrists. He tugged you a bit so that your hands were in front of you on your lap and you stared at his face as he messed with the silk ribbon, tightening it around your wrists. “But I won’t have to worry about that with you, will I? Cause you’re so good for me?”

As he spoke, he leaned towards you, his warm breath teasing your lips. You felt your lip’s part a little in anticipation of a kiss but you fought it in you to close the distance between you two. You had a feeling that today you had a specific goal… Self-control.

Jeonghan’s hands slid down your body to your sides and he lightly ran his fingers up and down them. You whined, under the touch, but bite down on your bottom lip to try to keep the noise from coming out.

You could see the approval in Jeonghan’s eyes. He pulled away from you, and agonizingly slowly began to undress himself. You watched him eagerly. You were itching to touch him, but even if you wanted to you couldn’t.

You felt yourself tugging subconsciously at the restraints on your wrists, and just as Jeonghan said the satin got tighter. Jeonghan’s lips quirked upwards as he watched you. He dropped his last piece of clothing to the side and walked up to you, roughly gripping you by your hips and pulling you close to him. He smiled at you, placing a soft kiss to your lips as he stared at you.

“Do you like this so far?” He asked you. “You’re so completely helpless to me. Normally if you wanted to you could get away from me but I’ve got you all tied up now… You can’t do anything but let me use you.”

That statement sent warmth through your body, and a whine involuntarily escaped your lips.

“Oh, that’s what you like about this isn’t it?”

He pushed you back against his bed hard and sank down to his knees.

“You like being helpless to me,” he murmured, and his breath ghosted your clit. You openly whined again, not afraid to let your desperation show in a small wiggle of your hips. That earned you a sharp slap to your, thigh.

“Be. Good,” Jeonghan said sternly. He dipped forward again, his mouth pressing a small kiss to your clit. It made your whole body shiver, and you were expecting him to do something more but all he did was blow lightly on your clit.

“All mine to play with,” he said softly. “Do you think you could ever dom me, y/n?”

You were quiet for a little while, trying to figure out how to answer. He slapped your pussy and your whole body jumped.

“I-I don’t know,” you blurted out.

“The correct answer was that no. You couldn’t because you need me to tell you exactly what you want. You’re such a brainless slut that you can’t even think for yourself.”

Before you could confirm or negate his words (you weren’t sure which one you were supposed to do… God, he was right) Jeonghan had dove forward and began to suck at your clit.

You were already wet, soaked, dripping all over Jeonghan’s face. You could tell by the way he dipped his head lower, his tongue lewdly dipping inside of you, while one of his hands stretched your pussy lips out for him and his other hand pressed your pelvis down into the bed so that you couldn’t move.

You couldn’t help it, your upper body wiggled, and your arms thrashed a little, tugging at your restraints that only tightened as you moved your hands.

“God, you taste so fucking good,” Jeonghan mumbled in-between eating you out. He rested his cheek on your inner thigh as he peered up at you, pressing two fingers into you with ease. You mewled, still wiggling, desperate to be able to touch something but being completely unable to.

“This is entertaining,” Jeonghan commented, watching as your body twitched when he pressed his thumb to your clit. “Watching you so desperate to act up but being physically unable to.”

He groaned, turning his face into your thigh.

“And I’m so luckily… The only one who gets to be down here.”

He suddenly bit into your thigh, sucking a hickey into your skin there.

There were tears already running down your cheeks, but there was nothing you could do about them with your arms restrained.

Jeonghan pressed a soft kiss to the spot that he had left a mark on and pressed a third finger into you. He scissored the three fingers in and out of you.

“Always need to stretch you out a little before fucking you,” he replied. “Your poor little pussy can barely handle my cock.”

Jeonghan spit at your pussy and then slapped it hard, making your whole body jolt again. He got back up to his feet and grabbed you roughly by your wrists, tugging you across the bed so that your head was hanging off the side of it.

“But, let me get my dick wet before I break my pretty little toy.”

He shifted your tied up hands so that your fingers were by his thigh.

“Keep your hand there so you can tell me if you need me to stop,” he instructed. You barely got a: “yes sir” out before Jeonghan had plunged his cock down your throat. At first your jaw wasn’t wide enough, and you knew that because Jeonghan pulled his cock out of your mouth, slapped you hard and said: “Open up.” Before plunging his cock right back down into it.

You could feel his eyes on you as he pummeled his cock in and out of your mouth like it was your pussy. Groaning with every couching fit that he invoked but never stopping despite the coughs. He lowered one of his hands to your hair, and he tightly gripped the roots.

“Keep fucking moving…” He mumbled, threateningly, and then after going back to fucking your mouth he slapped at your breasts. You cried out at each hit, but the sound fell on mute ears as it was mostly muffled by Jeonghan’s cock down your throat.

Having him fuck your mouth at this angle was different for both of you. You felt like you could feel his cock stretching out your throat much more than you usually could when he fucked it. You were focusing hard on keeping your teeth off of his length.

And you could tell that he liked this angle better thanks to his small escapes of: “God your throat is so fucking tight.”

He fucked your mouth roughly just like that for only a few minutes before he, with no warning at all came down your throat. He pushed himself as far into you as he could, his balls resting against your forehead as his cock twitched the best it could inside of you.

He pulled his cock out of you before he was completely done, as always finding pleasure in the way you coughed up some of his cum, and the way that you twitched as he let the rest of his cum paint your face.

This time however he grabbed you by our cheeks, his fingers digging into them, forcing your mouth open. He leaned over and let a huge glob of spit drop into your mouth. He released your mouth, and you went to swallow it but before you could he was slapping you, and the spit was on your cheek.

He tutted in amusement.

“Stupid whore. So desperate to do good even though I never let you,” he murmured, the false sympathy sending warmth through your body.

“Wa-Wanna b-”

Before you could say anything more Jeonghan was dragging you off of his bed. You scrambled to keep yourself steady, as he dropped your back against his carpet. He kicked your thighs apart, and watched you wiggle on the ground, trying to get in the position he wanted you to be in. He hummed.

“You know what. Get up and crawl.”

Your eyes widened at the request… The order really but you instantly began to scramble and try to do what he wanted.

It was a struggle, but you were finally able to get on all fours like he wanted- Albeit not being very steady. Once you were up you looked up at Jeonghan, with your messy face and wide eyes and he reached behind you to slap your ass so hard that you fell on your face.

He laughed, a sadistic laugh that was so humiliating that it just made your pussy drip down your thighs. You finally got yourself back up and when you looked up at him, Jeonghan was right in front of you. His fingers ghosted just under your chin, and he smiled sweetly at you.

“Alright then. Crawl for me.”

He took a step back and tauntingly coaxed you forward, patting his knees lightly like you were a literal dog. You struggled forward, and every time you got close to him he was taking another step back.

“Go on then, you‘re walking like a bitch. Talk to me like one.”

Confusion riddled your body, and the hesitation it caused earned you a hard slap.

“I said, talk like a bitch.”

It was like a lightbulb went off in your head.

“Bark,” you said, your voice a little high. Jeonghan hummed, unamused.

“Bark like a bitch,” he reasserted. You barked again, and this time it must have been better because Jeonghan grabbed you by your hair and dragged you forward. He squished your mouth open again and forced his cock down your throat again.

You were so turned on now, it hurt, and you couldn’t help that even though the tears had stopped before they were rolling down your cheeks again. Jeonghan rolled his eyes at the display.

“You’re so fucking pathetic he mumbled.

He pulled you off of his cock again and you coughed for air and fought to steady yourself.

“Present yourself,” Jeonghan said.

You hesitated, looking up at him again with confused eyes.

“What is up with your hesitation?” He demanded. He grabbed you by your hair long enough to force your face into the carpet, and slapped your thighs so that your ass was higher in the air.

“Walk like a bitch, bark like a bitch, you’re going to take dick like a bitch.”

His fingers dipped between your folds, and you heard him tutting condescendingly.

“And your pussy is dripping… You’re a bitch in heat too huh?”

He didn’t wait for an answer. Instead, he pressed his hand to the back of your neck, your arms stretched out in front of you and still tied together- the restraints only having gotten tighter since you two had started since you just couldn’t stop struggling.

“I guess I’ll just have to breed you like a bitch in heat too.”

Jeonghan didn’t bother easing his cock into you. He pushed himself into you in one swift thrust. You screamed into the carpet but that didn’t make Jeonghan very happy.

“Bitches don’t scream,” he murmured. “Bitches bark.”

Tears soaked the carpet in front of you, but you barked weakly in response to his words. Jeonghan then begun to relentlessly fuck you.

He didn’t seem to care about your own pleasure, which made you, of course, even more turned on.

He fucked you so hard that if it hadn’t been for the way he was pressing you into the carpet you would be sliding around like crazy. Your hands couldn’t help but thrash against each other, trying so hard to grab at anything but being completely unable to.

Jeonghan’s first orgasm came suddenly, and he didn’t even hesitate as he fucked his cum hard into you. It dragged an orgasm out of you that you didn’t get punished for. In fact, he didn’t even acknowledge it. Instead, he just fucked you through it, ignoring the way that your body was shaking and convulsing under him.

Instead of speaking you tried to let out weak barks in between your moans, to show him that you weren’t completely mindless but when your second orgasm dragged a second orgasm from him, the barks just became combined with broken sobs of pleasure, and they really were mindless.

Another orgasm wracked through your body, and you were just vaguely aware of Jeonghan saying: “Such a good little bitch, getting full of my cum.” As he came inside of you one more time.

Your whole body was shaking when he came to a full stop inside of you. He wrapped his arm around your waist so that you could fall limp under him.

“Do you feel that?” Jeonghan asked you slightly. “Do you feel all that cum that your dirty cunt is letting drip out of you.”

He shook his head- You could feel it- and sighed. “Your body still isn’t trained enough for this. You’re still not a perfectly good girl, are you?”

You let out a sob, and pushed yourself up on your elbows, looking back at Jeonghan over your shoulder.

“N-No I’m g-good, s-so good,” you blurted out. “I-I took all your cum. I’ll try to keep it in.”

“But you’re not a good girl,” Jeonghan reminded you. He pulled his cock out of you, and you instinctively pushed your ass up, trying to prevent his cum from dripping from you but despite your efforts you could feel all three of his loads gushing out of you.

You cried a little into the carpet, but it felt so good, that you almost didn’t care. Jeonghan let you sit like that for only a few seconds before he was kneeling in front of you. He pressed his lips to your pussy and began to lap at it, eating his own cum out of you until it genuinely felt like he had cleaned all of it out of you.

You felt him turning you around so that he leaned you up, pressing your back against the bed. He got on your lap, his limp cock brushing your hand. He ducked his head a little and began to kiss you, letting you taste the combination of your cum and his on his tongue.

As he kissed you, he lowered his hands to your wrists, and slowly, carefully began to undo your restraints.

It was a bit of a struggle, but Jeonghan was able to undo the satin pretty quickly. He loosely wrapped it around your neck, using the ends to keep your face close to his. He kissed you until you were even. Breathing even, body not shaking, his fingers rubbing soothing circles into the spots that the satin had pressed too hard into your skin. He broke the kiss, letting the satin fall over your chest.

“Does it hurt?” he asked you softly. He raised one of your wrists to his mouth so that he could press soft kisses over the marks. You decided to be honest.

“A little,” you mumbled. “But it was worth it.”

“Yeah?”

He raised his eyes back up to yours, looking into them to see if he could detect anything in them that suggested you were lying. “Did I do anything you didn’t like?”

He asked you softly. You shook your head. Sure, your face and your wrists and your ass all burned, and your jaw was sore from how hard he had been fucking your mouth, and you could still feel his spit on your cheek mixed with his cum and your tears, but you felt so satisfied. So proud of yourself for being able to keep up.

“I liked all of it,” you murmured, and as you admitted it your voice dropped a little and so did your eyes. Jeonghan lightly raised your chin up so that you were looking at him again.

“You’re so silly,” he admonished lightly. “Nothing to be shy about. You did so good for me. Do you know that? You’re always such a good girl for me.”

Your eyes involuntarily teared up a little at that, and a few stray tears ran down your cheeks.

“I’m good for you,” you repeated like a whisper. Jeonghan nodded and kissed away your tears.

“You are always good for me,” he reassured. “And I love you, you know that?”

You nodded, keeping his gaze.

“What do you think?” He asked softly. “A bath or a shower?”

You groaned and dropped your head onto his shoulder.

“I hate you,” you mumbled, and it made him laugh.

“Come on, it’s not that bad,” he said softly. “We’ll get you nice and clean yeah? And you wanted to watch that show with me, didn’t you?”

Your eyebrows furrowed and you peeked up at him suspiciously.

“We get to watch a show?” You asked, surprised by how… Childish it sounded coming out of your mouth. Jeonghan nodded his confirmation.

“Of course,” he assured softly. “And I can go get us some food too. Mingyu made soup the other day.”

You frowned at him.

“Can you….” Your face was starting to burn again. “Take the bath with me.”

Jeonghan laughed softly and he nodded.

“Of course, I can, baby.”

He pressed a small kiss to your lips.

“You’re so good for me.”

After a warm and thorough bath, Jeonghan did as he promised, retrieving some of the best soup that you had ever had before, and settling next to you in his bed so that you two could watch the show you’d been wanting to watch with him for weeks.

You fell asleep partway through the second episode, with your head on his chest.

-

You dipped into the fridge as per Jeonghan’s request trying to locate the banana milk in question.

“You shouldn’t enable his banana milk addiction,” Minghao warned. You glanced back at him. “You know he’s lactose intolerant right?”

Your eyes widened and you turned to Jeonghan who had fixed Minghao under a death glare, when he looked at you however his angry expression disappeared as if it had never been there in the first place.

“I’m not lactose intolerant,” he said with a laugh. “Come on, who would you believe? Minghao or me?”

You pointed at Minghao without a second thought.

“Minghao,” you replied pointedly. To his credit he did look offended. A pout crossed his lips.

“This relationship is built on a foundation of trust-” You raised your eyebrows towards him, and he closed his mouth. “I’m not that lactose intolerant.”

You rolled your eyes but turned back into the fridge, grabbing two of the small cartons of the banana milk. You walked back over to the table and set one of the cartons in front of him. He smiled brightly, and reached up towards you, pulling you down to him by the back of your neck.

He pressed a kiss to your lips.

“See? This is why I love you,” he said softly. “You do whatever I want you to.”

You smiled against his lips, but you pulled away anyways, trying to hide it.

“So, you like me because I’m complacent?” You asked him. Jeonghan’s grip on you loosened and you sat back down next to him, your shoulder brushing against his.

“I do,” Jeonghan agreed. “I thought you knew that?”

“Just wondered if you would admit it in front of Minghao.”

“We all know why Jeonghan likes you and it isn’t because you’re complacent,” Minghao mumbled, and despite the expression on his face there was a twinge of amusement in the tone of his voice.

“Everyone knows why Jeonghan likes me…?” You repeated. You glanced at Jeonghan, who looked like he was tuning the both of you out. He had the small bendy straw of his milk in his mouth. “I doubt that.”

“He talks about you more than you think,” Minghao replied.

“You’re being annoying Minghao, she knows how much I like her.”

You did know, and honestly the expression on Jeonghan’s face was cute. Eyebrows furrowed in frustration, his fingers clutching the cartoon he was holding a bit too tight. Minghao rolled his eyes at Jeonghan.

“Fine, I’ll leave you two alone.”

Jeonghan didn’t say anything, his eyes stayed stuck on a spot on the table.

“Bye Minghao,” you said. He hummed as he slipped out of the room, leaving you two alone. You and Jeonghan sat for a few seconds in silence before you finally scooted towards him. You raised a hand to his face, his cheek so smooth under your touch.

“Jeonghan,” you coaxed softly, your thumb running over his cheek bone.

He hummed, keeping his eyes away from you, ignoring you. You sighed.

“Jeonghan,” you repeated. His eyes flickered to you so briefly before looking away again. “Jeonghan, why are you upset?”

“I’m not upset love,” he said, but you could tell that wasn’t true. You pouted just a bit.

“Yes, you are,” you pressed. You pressed at his face, trying to get him to look at you more insistently. He did, giving you a pressed smile.

“Why would I be upset?” He asked. Your gaze sharpened. He sighed. “He talks about you more than you think.”

Your eyebrows furrowed slightly.

“What?”

“More than you think,” Jeonghan repeated. “As if I don’t say it. The implication that you don’t know that I like you.”

“I’m sure he didn’t mean it like that,” you said softly. He sighed, again, looking away from you.

“They all think like that. Because I have always been so emotionally repressed they think that Yoon Jeonghan doesn’t know how to share affection.”

“You’re really good at showing affection,” you said, and you were being completely honest. “Well… After that whole lying about fucking others fiasco.”

Jeonghan gave you a distraught look.

“Okay, I’m kind of bad at showing affection, but you know that I love you.”

You nodded your confirmation.

“I know that you love me.”

He sighed and turned to look at you more straight on. He raised his hands to cup your face in the way that he liked to so much. His thumbs brushed over your cheekbones, and his eyes trailed over your features. Your cheeks reddened at the attention but you stayed silent regardless, letting him look at you.

You would never understand why but… It always comforted him.

After a few minutes he leaned forward and pressed a kiss to your lips. Not deepening it. Making it very chaste, smile against your lips as he did it.

“I never doubt that you love me,” you mumbled. Jeonghan pulled back, giving you a slightly skeptical look. “I don’t doubt it. I just… Don’t always understand it.”

Jeonghan hummed, and pulled away from you, glancing at his phone on the counter.

“I have a class to get to,” he said with a sigh. “Where do you want a ride to?”

“I want to get some walking in,” you replied. “I’ll see you on…” You trailed off. “Well. Soon?”

Jeonghan paused, frowning.

“…Soon?” He asked. You frowned back at him.

“I’m busy. I can’t keep spending every day with you.”

Now it was Jeonghan’s turn to look distraught.

“You’re leaving me?”

You rolled your eyes.

“Shut up,” you mumbled. “I just need a few days to study and things.”

“You can study with me.”

“Don’t you respect my space?” You asked him. He rolled his eyes. You both knew the answer to that.

Not really.

“I’ll see you on Friday.”

“Friday?” Jeonghan blurted. You rolled your eyes and stood up, leaning down to press a small kiss to Jeonghan’s forehead, mirroring what he would normally do with you.

“Distance makes the heart grow fonder you know?”

You knew that Jeonghan didn’t believe that. That he was very quality time.

But you needed to study a bit more, so you were going to have to focus on that. And you were a lot less distracted when you were studying without Jeonghan around.

-

Your attention to your homework was dragged away by the distinct sound of Jeonghan’s voice. Your eyebrows furrowed a bit as you looked across the library, seeing Jeonghan standing a few tables away with a backpack hanging off one of his shoulders. A smile flickered across your lips- Unwarranted- But it died when you realized who he was saying hi to.

It was some girl- Why was it always some girl?- And you could hear a giggle echo from her lips across the library. She was in an ungodly short skirt, with a tight crop top on and she looked so hot. It wasn’t fair.

You couldn’t hear their conversation, but you could see that Jeonghan was actually interested in it. Maybe he pretended not to be interested in conversations for your sake when he knew that you were there. He had a small smile on his lips talking to her. A cute smile. He looked so cute. She looked so happy. Stupid smile on both of their lips.

As Jeonghan spoke, he turned his head slightly, his hair brushing over his shoulder. You thought for a moment he was going to see you but just before his eyes fell on you, they darted back to the girl.

“Y/n, what are you looking at?”

You ripped your eyes away from Jeonghan. Briefly, in order to look at Yeongtae.

“My boyfriend,” you mumbled. You only added the next part because it was Yeongtae and he knew you didn’t mean it. “And his hot new girlfriend.”

Yeongtae glanced over his shoulder, following your eye line and sighed.

“Are you kidding me?” He asked bluntly. “Didn’t you ditch him today?”

You felt something uncomfortable brewing in your stomach and you knew you needed to look away.

“I didn’t ditch him,” you mumbled. “I just don’t get that much work done around him! It’s just a few days.”

“You ditched him,” Yeongtae repeated. “And now you’re jealous.” He waved his pencil through the air. “Toxic, toxic, toxic.”

You kicked Yeongtae from under the table, causing him to curse.

“You’re gonna fall another quiz if you keep acting like that.”

That shut Yeongtae up and allowed you to keep your eyes on Jeonghan.

You rubbed the balls of your feet against the floor, finally deciding that you couldn’t just watch him talk to her anymore but you obviously also couldn’t not watch. You pulled out your phone and typed out a quick text message: Studying is so uneventful.

You sent it before you could think over it too much.

You didn’t care if it wasn’t characteristic of you to say. You didn’t have the energy to think about something that felt more natural.

You watched Jeonghan immediately shift his body, attention still on the girl in front of him. He pulled his phone from his pocket, glancing at the screen for just a second. He gave the girl a serious look, one that you couldn’t really pinpoint the emotion of.

“One second, it’s my girlfriend.”

The acknowledgment of your existence was enough to have you breathing easy again, but the feeling of ease was ripped away from you when your phone started to vibrate in your hands. Your eyes widened and you immediately answered the phone, dropping your voice as much as you could so that Jeonghan wouldn’t be able to hear.

“Hey,” you said. “What- I can’t really talk right now, I’m-”

“You feel better now?” As Jeonghan spoke his head turned, his eyes falling to you. He had a large playful smile on his lips as the two of you made eye contact, making your face darken in embarrassment.

“I-”

Jeonghan’s laugh was so genuine. He dropped one of his hands to cover the microphone of the phone as if it would make you unable to hear him.

“That’s my girlfriend over there,” he clarified. His eyes only flickered away from you for a moment. He dropped his phone to his side saying a: “I’ll see you in class tomorrow.”

Before making his way over to you. You could hear the shuffling of his shirt against his phone as he walked over to you, and you held it to your face as if that would make this less humiliating. You looked down at your homework, your lips pressing together but you were only looking like that for a few moments before Jeonghan’s hand was on your chin and he was turning your face to his. He still had such a bright smile on his face.

“Did you think I didn’t know you were there?” He asked you lightly. “You are the very first thing I notice when I walk into a room.”

He willed your lips closer to his and then, before he could kiss you he pulled away from you completely, his hand dragging lightly along your back as he dragged the chair out next to you and took a seat beside you.

“Yeongtae,” he greeted.

“Hi,” Yeongtae said back. You buried your face in your hands, peeking out at Yeongtae between the spaces of your fingers. He gave you a very brief panicked look and then dropped his eyes back down to his own homework. You sighed, and turned your head to face Jeonghan who was looking down at the laptop that he had brought out of his backpack.

“You have class with her?” You asked him. You knew how it sounded but you really didn’t mean it that way. You were prying for the sake of more information about him, not for information about her. Jeonghan hummed.

“Yeah.”

He fell silent, making frustration bubble into your throat.

“What class?” You prodded.

“An ISS course, People and the Environment,” Jeonghan replied, and the ambiguity of it was driving you even crazier. People and the Environment? What did someone even learn in a class like that? ISS courses were required in basically every single major at the university. It didn’t narrow down anything at all.

“I guess it’s just one course huh,” you continued pressing. “Probably just met her.”

“No, we’ve had classes together every year,” Jeonghan negated. “We’re applying for the same internship this summer.”

Internship? Classes every year?

You could feel the jealousy building impossibly harder at the thoughts and it wasn’t even because Jeonghan was with that girl it was because she knew more about him than you did. Thoughts of them sitting next to each other in classes flooded your head. The unspoken bond that was surely between the two of them was something that you would never achieve with him yourself.

Yeah, Jeonghan loved you and you were dating him, but this girl knew him. And you didn’t.

“You’re applying for an internship this summer?” You asked softly. Jeonghan nodded again and he turned to you.

“I am,” he agreed. “But I’ll still be in town, you don’t have to worry about missing me.”

He was teasing you. Teasing you and it was about something that you weren’t even worried about.

“What’s the internship for?” You pressed but, Jeonghan’s smile only grew.

“Now, now, are you cheating?” He chided. “You’re trying to get my major out of me. You’ve just got to let these things happen.”

“But-” Before you could get anything out, Jeonghan’s hand was being pressed distractingly to your face.

“Let it happen naturally,” he murmured, ignoring your spluttering protests. You heard Yeongtae let out a snicker.

“It is natural,” you insisted. “You would just… Tell me what your internship is going to be, and I would figure out your major… Naturally.”

Jeonghan leaned close to you, his thumb flickering over your bottom lip.

“It will come naturally,” he assured you softly. His thumb slipped under your chin and he coaxed your face closer to his. Once his lips were close enough to yours, he gave you a chaste kiss, pulling back before he could give you anything of real substance. “Just as natural as I get to kiss you.”

Jeonghan smiled at you and gestured at your homework.

“Shouldn’t you get back to work? I didn’t come here to distract you.”

That brought up a whole different question: “Why did you come here?”

“Because you were here,” Jeonghan replied as if it were obvious. His gaze flickered back to yours, recognizing your confusion and he gestured off-handedly back at Yeongtae. “Yeongtae told me that you two were studying here.”

Your confusion only grew.

“When did you and Yeongtae start talking?” You asked. Jeonghan turned his attention back to his own work, his hand falling on your thigh as he scooted his chair closer to you.

“We just did. Sometime after you and I got together.”

You shot Yeongtae a half-glare and as soon as he caught sight of it his eyes were widening and he was zoning back into his work.

“I’m glad you two are getting along,” you said, turning back to face Jeonghan. He still wasn’t looking at you, but his thumb dragged a small circle into your thigh to prove that he was listening. “But it feels a bit like you’re plotting against me.”

Both boys ignored you. You sighed.

Fine.

You turned your attention back to your own work. Just the outline of a presentation you would have to do soon. You tapped your pencil in irritation against the table, your thoughts unable to turn away from your boyfriend next to you.

You pulled your laptop out, beginning to boot it up, and as you waited for it to let you log on you glanced over at Jeonghan. He seemed to be reading something, and he was scary focused. So focused that he didn’t even notice that you were staring.

A thought shot through your head, that if you looked at whatever paper Jeonghan was reading maybe you would be able to figure out what he was reading. And maybe that would give you some kind of indication as to what he was studying.

You pressed your lips together and turned your attention to his computer, trying to make it seem like you were still just watching your own. You tried to pick out the words on his screen but you couldn’t see. You tried to look better but just as you did Jeonghan was squeezing your side, and turning his computer screen.

“Stop reading my homework,” he chided. You groaned, your head falling onto Jeonghan’s shoulder.

“Jeonghan please just tell me what your major is,” you begged softly. “I’m never just going to figure it out, I’m not a figure it out kind of person I’m a you tell me and I remember it kind of person.”

“You’ve got to learn to be patient,” he chided you softly. “You’ll figure it out at some point.”

You didn’t move from where you were sitting a surely pouting at Jeonghan but all he did was swipe his thumb across your chin, press a small kiss to your lips, and smile at you.

“Get back to studying.”

-

“Alright, alright,” Yeongtae pressed as you two watched Jeonghan’s car disappear around the corner. “Let it out.”

“Let what out?” You asked him, shrugging your bag further up on your shoulder.

“It,” Yeongtae encouraged. You considered pretending that you didn’t know what he was talking about, but after only a few seconds you decided that you didn’t want to.

“I don’t know anything about him,” you blurted frustratedly. “Like, anything about him… At all.”

“That’s not true,” Yeongtae denied but you ignored him, waving your hands in the air wildly.

“I don’t know his major. I didn’t know he was lactose intolerant. I-”

“What are you expecting?” Yeongtae interrupted, even though he had been then one telling you to just let it out. “That you would just know everything about him?”

You pressed your lips together in frustration.

“Well-”

“You don’t just magically learn things about people,” Yeongtae mumbled. Your annoyance only built inside of you.

“Obviously I know that Yeongtae,” you replied. “It’s just… Why does everyone else know so much more about him then me?”

“Because they’ve known him longer,” Yeongtae pointed out.

“Not even just… That girl from his class, or the boys of Alpha Mu,” you argued back. “Ask anyone something random about him and I bet that they could name more than me.”

“Well…” Yeongtae sighed and rolled his eyes. “I mean… Yeah. He’s Yoon Jeonghan.”

Another starking reminder of the thing that you always forgot. There were a lot of people who were interested in Jeonghan. Not even just Jeonghan but all the boys of Alpha Mu. Especially now that you were really welcome over there all the time… It was easy to forget that Jeonghan wasn’t just Jeonghan.

He was Yoon Jeonghan.

You had tried to tell him that that was something that bothered you and even so in such a short amount of time you had forgotten.

You fell back against your chair, shoving the back of your head into the headrest.

“Yoon Jeonghan. I’m dating Yoon Jeonghan.”

-

You stood in front of Jeonghan’s class nervously, your fingers toying with the strands of your backpack.

This was humiliating. Really.

First, texting Seungcheol ahead of time to ask him what Jeonghan’s schedule was…. The: what could you possibly want that for? ㅋㅋ, made you want to scream into your pillow.

… You did in fact scream into your pillow over it.

But this too? You weren’t this kind of person. You didn’t go behind people’s backs and figure out their schedules. You didn’t surprise people out of the blue. You weren’t the person who did these things in relationships.

The door to the classroom popped open and students began to pour out of the classroom. You sucked in a deep breath, your head dipping slightly to try and avoid garnering too much attention to yourself. You realized quickly however that just seeing shoes wasn’t going to be super helpful in getting Jeonghan’s attention. You let your eyes trail back up and you noticed as Jeonghan slipped outside of the classroom. He was next to someone you didn’t recognize. A girl… Long hair. Not the same girl from the library.

You felt your fingernail pressing into the pad of your thumb, you were so nervous. You shouldn’t have just showed up. You should have texted him. You thought about just walking away but you shook it out of your head.

“Jeonghan,” you called, but it was so quiet. You could barely hear yourself. You cleared your throat. “Jeonghan.”

He was talking to the girl. He still didn’t seem able to hear you over his classmates. You sucked in a sharp breath and then, pulling on your backpack straps, you walked towards Jeonghan and his classmate.

You couldn’t hear what they were talking about… Unfortunate. Maybe it would give you a clue on what his major was.

“… but when he mentioned the problem on page 83 tha-”

“Y/n?” Jeonghan interrupted the conversation, his lips quirking up into a smile. You stopped walking, a smile flickering across your face as well as he changed the direction, he was walking so that he could come straight over to you. You lifted your head up a little as he came close to you so that it would be easy for him to press a small kiss to your lips- Which he did- and once he had pulled back, he was smiling even harder.

“What are you doing here?” He asked you, seeming to have completely forgotten about his classmate who… Just looked a little confused to see you there.

“I thought we could get lunch,” you replied slowly. Jeonghan gave you a small quirk of the eyebrow. You just glanced past him towards the door he had come out of. “What class are you coming from?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” Jeonghan replied lightly. “Is that why you’re really here? Trying to figure out what class I’m coming from?”

Your mouth gaped a little bit at the accusation, but it wasn’t completely untrue. You could have just texted him and met him at the school cafeteria or something. Your reaction was answer enough. He nodded and turned back over to the classmate he was with.

“I’ll catch you later,” he told her. “My girlfriend is going to take me to lunch.”

Your face flushed red a little as Jeonghan gestured for you to lead the way. You could feel a lot of eyes on you, and it made you swallow hard in embarrassment. Jeonghan smiled a little when he noticed your embarrassment. He walked up next to you, his shoulder brushing yours.

“Would you like it better if I held your hand?” He asked you teasingly.

You gave him an annoyed expression.

“Is that you projecting?” You asked him lightly. “Do you want to hold my hand?”

“There’s a lot of things that I want to do with you,” he replied, his voice dropping a little to a tone that you very much recognized. Your face flushed a little more but before you could respond, Jeonghan’s hand was finding yours. You thought it would be awkward, especially considering you weren’t expecting it, but Jeonghan’s hand slid easily into your hand.

Once your fingers intertwined, Jeonghan gave you a small squeeze and then swung your hands forward in a playful way.

“You know everyone is going to look at us and think-”

“Who is that girl with Jeonghan? He’s really playing the long con with her,” you offered up. He rolled his eyes.

“They’re going to understand the rumors about me dating someone,” he replied lightly. He tugged you closer to him, and bumped your shoulders. “You’re so beautiful… And perfect.”

You huffed softly, and looked away from him at the students you two were walking past. Surely enough they were looking at the two of you, whispering to one another. It made you want to rip your hand away from Jeonghan. All you could think about was all these people looking at you and Jeonghan. You almost forgot in a weird way that he was even there.

Suddenly, you felt your arm being pulled and you stumbled a little to a stop, turning over your shoulder to find that Jeonghan was pouting at you. Your thoughts of other people melted away, and confusion riddled across your face.

“What’s wrong?” You asked him. Your thoughts raced. “What did I do?”

“You’re thinking about everyone else so much you’re not thinking about me,” Jeonghan replied factually, even though, how could he know that? You frowned at him slightly, holding the space between you two for a little bit. Then when he didn’t budge you closed the distance between the two of you, giving him an apologetic expression.

“I’m just-”

Before you could respond Jeonghan was raising his hand to the back of your neck, pulling you closer to him so that he could drag you into a deep kiss. You wanted to be self-conscious in it, but it was hard to when Jeonghan’s thumb was rubbing small circles into the back of your neck.

When Jeonghan pulled away, his pout was gone, replaced by a smile and you knew he had gotten what he wanted.

“Don’t think about all these other people,” he said softly. “Think about me.”

You pressed your lips together because… If you didn’t you thought, you would try to kiss him again and nodded. Jeonghan stared at you for a few moments as if trying to decipher how you were feeling now but didn’t seem to find anything that bothered him.

He didn’t have to say it for you to hear him loud and clear: I love you.

You gave him a small smile.

“What do you want for lunch?”

-

Class had been frustrating so when you get out of class and saw that Jeonghan was leaning against the hallway wall, talking to some girl that you had never seen before. You didn’t even really care. You walked over to them, and smiled brightly at Jeonghan your boyfriend.

“You came to see me after class?” You asked him, the excitement in your voice undeniable. Jeonghan smiled and nodded.

“Yeongtae told me that you two weren’t studying today so I thought that we could spend some time together,” he replied. He took you by your wrists and pulled you close to him so that your chest pressed into his. He leaned forward a bit so that he could give you a chaste kiss to your lips. His thumbs rubbed your wrists comfortingly.

You thought in the back of your head that he should warn you before he just showed up at your class. After all, unlike Yeongtae you did have other friends but in this very moment, you didn’t care, you were more than happy to bid good bye to the girl he was talking to. No question on who it was and you were happy to walking with Jeonghan to his car.

And yet, you were only in his car for a few moments before Jeonghan felt the need to start to toy with you.

Jeonghan’s hand dipped beneath the waist band of your pants, his index finger finding your clit with ease. He toyed with it for a few moments.

“What’s your safe word?”

You blurted it, only then realizing that you had been very insistently holding your breath. Once Jeonghan heard your safe word his hand was sliding further down into your pants, his fingers meeting dampness.

A smile click of Jeonghan’s tongue both fulled you with embarrassment at having already been wet and pride. You knew that the feeling thrilled him even when he talked down to you for it.

“You’re such a little whore,” he mumbled softly. Before you could respond his fingers dipped inside of you, and your whole body arched into his chest. Your hand shot up and you grabbed hold of the handle on the ceiling, as your legs immediately spread for him.

“Are you really this shameless?” He asked you. “You’d let me fuck you anywhere wouldn’t you? In front of anyone?”

You whined in response, and it wasn’t a response, but Jeonghan didn’t really care.

“I need you to remind me again that you know your safe word,” Jeonghan said softly. His fingers didn’t still inside of you, but his tone confused you a bit. He never asked for souble confirmation that you knew your safe word. You frowned a bit but repeated your safe word.

“Okay,” he murmured. “I want you to unbuckle your seat belt and get my cock out. Licks. Not sucking. It’s the only time I’ll ever allow you to edge me.”

You nodded, and started to do as he wanted before he was even done. You two were now just driving very slowly down a small road towards your apartment. Sure there were some cars passing by and a few people on the side walk but you might as well have been sight seeing with the speed at which he was going. A car crash was the last thing that you were worried about.

“And I want you to pull your pants down to your knees and stick your ass in the air so that everyone can see while I finger your pretty pussy.”

You understood why he had wanted to make sure you really knew your safe word. You hesitated, your fingers wrapped around the base of his cock.

You weren’t that much of an exhibitionist… At least you hadn’t been before you started fucking Jeonghan. You thought to your other moments… Calling Yeongtae… Letting him fuck you in the store bathroom… Letting him fuck you against the window at the library.

With your ass in the air, and your mouth on his cock, it wasn’t like anyone would be able to see your face anyways.

Without much more thought you were finishing doing what he asked, pulling your pants down to your knees and pressing your lips to Jeonghan’s cock.

“Oh you really are such a slut,” Jeonghan murmured, but the praise in his voice was undeniable. “You’re so desperate to please that you really will do anything for me.”

Instead of responding you began to tentatively lick at Jeonghan’s slowly hardening cock. As you did that Jeonghan’s hand made it’s way over to your pussy, which was now dripping wetness down your thighs.

“You really like this don’t you?” Jeonghan observed, his fingers gathering the wetness. He then slathered his cock in your wetness so that you could see just how much there was. Your face flushed red but you went back to lapping at his cock, now able to taste your salty wetness as well.

Jeonghan’s fingers returned to your pussy, and this time he just plunged two of his fingers into your pussy. You whined, your fingers tightening around Jeonghan’s cock, as your head dipped forward a bit, small pants leaving your lips.

“I wish you could see how jealous everyone looks,” he commented lightly. “They’re all so jealous watching as I finger your pretty pussy. I know they wish that their fingers were buried inside of you instead of mine.”

Your face burned at the thought as Jeonghan’s car slowed to a stop. You glanced up and noticed that there was a stop light.

“I’m going to roll down the window so that everyone can hear you,” Jeonghan warned, waiting a few seconds for a protest. You gave none. You heard the distinct sound of Jeonghan’s window rolling down, and it was like you could feel eyes on you as Jeonghan began to curl his fingers inside of you to that spot that he knew drove you crazy.

“F-Fuck.”

You knew without having to be told that Jeonghan wanted you loud so you didn’t hold back the moans of pleasure, and you tried not to feel to embarrassed by the squelching sound of Jeonghan’s fingers sliding in and out of your soaked pussy.

The “show” didn’t last long ,and you never got to see how was watching if anyone was at all. You suddenly heard Jeonghan rolling up the window and his car started to roll forward again.

“You sound like a whore,” Jeonghan grumbled. Before more could be said, he reached up and buried his fingers into your hair, forcing your head down onto his cock.

You could as his whole cock was forced into your throat but no complaints were about to leave you. You could feel the pleasure at having done well curling in your stomach, you felt like you could come at any moment-

You felt Jeonghan’s car rolling to a stop and once the car jerked into a stop, his hand cracked hard against your ass. You gasped in surprise at the sudden touch only to be ripped right back off of his cock.

“In my lap. Now.”

You weren’t sure where you two were. An empty parking lot? It didn’t really matter. You obediently climbed into Jeonghan’s lap, and without doubling checking lined yourself up on Jeonghan’s cock. As you tried to get it in right, you accidentally rubbed his tip a few times between your folds which must’ve seemed like a tease because the second his tip had slid into your pussy he had pushed you all the way down onto him.

You cried out in surprise, a small stretch vibrating through your body that Jeonghan did not give you much time to adjust to. He grabbed your hips and began to forcefully raise you up and down the length of his cock. You whined, your body writhing in pleasure as all you could do was keep your face buried in his neck as he forced you up and down on his cock like you were some kind of sex doll.

“This is what you were made for,” he mumbled right beside your ear. “You were made for my cock. Made to be used by me for my own pleasure. And you like it don’t you? You like just being pummeled by my cock. Being stuffed full and used like your own pleasure doesn’t even matter.”

You nodded but Jeonghan was not satisfied by that. You were ripped back by your hair, and roughly slapped so that little tears sprouted at the corners of your eyes.

“I asked you a question you stupid slut. Are you even listening to what I say to you? Or is your small little brain unable to comprehend anything other than my cock filling you up?”

“I-I-“ You struggled to find your words but Jeonghan only started fucking you harder at that, purposely trying to make it more difficult for you. “Pl-please I-I- wanna-“

You weren’t able to get any straight words out and it earned you another slap which did not make it easier.

“I-I’m go-gonna-”

Jeonghan was spilling his cum into you without warning, seeming to find pleasure at your desperation to come along with your desperation to please him.

“Then why don’t you just do it and come like brainless slut you are?” Jeonghan suggested.

You were coming hard before you really knew it. Your whole body shook and you could have sworn that white flashed as your body fell limp against Jeonghan. His fingers loosened their tight grip on your lips, and you could his cock trapping his cum inside of you.

It was a little sweaty know in his car. Your shirt was sticking to you in a way that was a bit uncomfortable but, you didn’t pay it much thought.

“Y/n?”

You ignored Jeonghan, focusing on your breathing. You were so full. He felt so good. Your body was still shaking a little, surprised by how rough he had been so suddenly.

“Y/n.”

You peeled back enough so that you could hazily look at Jeonghan. He gave you a small smile and observed the expression on your face. After deeming it okay he began to press small kisses across it.

“You’re being really good baby,” he assured you lightly. “Always so good for me. You sure that was okay?”

You nodded distractedly, the exhaustion of the day finally hitting you.

Jeonghan laughed a little.

“Come on now, did I actually fuck you that good? You can’t get out a sentence?”

You forced yourself to focus on Jeonghan. You gave him a small smile.

“You always fuck me that good,” you replied. He let out a small laughed and patted you on the back of your head.

“Okay baby let’s get you home.”

Jeonghan was so annoying when it came to after care. He insisted on piggy backing you up to your apartment, and once you two were back he was drawing you a bath, searching your cabinets for sugar scrub and body butter.

He sat just outside of the bathtub, after laying you down into the warm soapy water. He was so focused on getting you clean too. Asking you off-handedly small things about your day as he rubbed the sugar scrub into your skin.

You stared at Jeonghan’s soft face as he lathered face soap into yours.

“Hey Jeonghan,” you mumbled softly. He hummed at you, distractedly. He wasn’t really listening. “Tell me that you love me again.”

His eyes flickered up to yours.

“I do,” he assured and his voice sounded so genuine. “I love you so much y/n.”

You smiled at him.

“Okay,” you whispered softly.

If Jeonghan was put off by the fact you didn’t say it back, he didn’t voice it.

“Do you want to do face masks?”

You had bought a couple of lego sets for Jeonghan to do while he was over at your place, and so after you two had both gotten cleaned and dressed, you two had ordered food and put facemasks on.

You watched him as he assembled the lego pieces and you thought idly that he was really good at building things.

“Can I have any hints at what your major is?” You asked, letting your voice drop to an octave that you thought might intice him to just tell you what you wanted to hear. He raised a skeptical eyebrow towards you.

“No,” he replied. The finality in his voice made you groan.

“This is unfair, won’t you tell me anything about yourself?” You asked him. “What about Kibum and Jiheon? Tell me more about them.”

Jeonghan thought over your request.

“Well, I will tell you that actually Jiheon and I are very close. She invites me to do a lot of things with her. I’m not really a part of her friend group but… I am.”

“Oh.”

That was good information actually. You nodded, pretending not to find the information that life changing.

“I think our food is here.”

-

Jiheon was a history major and so you knew that to casually bump into her all you had to do was camp outside of the history building bus stop. And of course, you had dragged Yeongtae with you.

“There are better ways to figure out things about Jeonghan.”

You mostly ignored him, your fingers drumming against the edge of your phone.

“This is going to work Yeongtae. Jeonghan said that he’s basically in her friend group if I can just get the chance to hang out with them then I will see a whole other side of him that he isn’t letting me see right now.”

“Yeah but this is a little psychiotic don’t you think?” He questioned. “Waiting for her outside of the-”

Before he could continue your eyes noticed a familiar ponytail in a crowd. Your eyes widened.

“Okay, okay game on.”

You two quickly changed your topic of conversation to one that was a little more fitting. Something about homework and classes that had frustrated you two. It was scary how natural it sounded.

“Oh my god, wait a second-“ Jiheon let out an excited sound and she bounced over to the two of you.

“Is that who I think it is? Mrs. Yoon.”

Your face flushed a dark red at being called such a thing and you immediately questioned if maybe you would have been better off if you had tried to target someone else. Maybe Cheol would be able to help you see the side of Jeonghan you hadn’t yet.

“Jiheon?” You replied, feigning surprise. “Oh, wow this is, uh-” You gestured towards Yeongtae, who dipped his head towards Jiheon. “This is Yeongtae.”

“Oh, Yeongtae,” Jiheon greeted softly. “I’ve seen you at a few parties.”

Now it was Yeongtae’s turn to turn red.

That Cheol idea was sounding more and more tempting… But you reminded yourself that he would probably see right through you and encourage you to just reach out to Jeonghan about all of this yourself. He’ll tell you when he wants to.

“I’m guessing Jeonghan told you about the friend group,” Jiheon said slightly, a smile on her face. “And you want to meet them so you can get to know Jeonghan better.”

Your mouth fell open in surprise at the accusation. Mostly at the accuracy of it. You fleetingly remembered what Kibum had said about her being able to practically read minds.

“Well,” Jiheon continued, not even waiting for you to continue. “You’re in lucky because we’re all going to the bar tonight and you and your friend Yeongtae are more than invited!”

Jiheon giggled and jumped up, wrapping her arm around your shoulders excitedly.

“It’ll be so much fun! Everyone has been begging to meet you ever since Jeonghan started prioritizing moping about you not being by his side 24/7 over hanging out with us.”

You felt a bit guilty but you didn’t have a super long time to think about it.

“Come on. We’re going to miss the bus.”

-

You’d never been to the bar that Jiheon ended up taking you and Yeongtae to but you found that you did like it. You were pleasantly surprised by the dark wood tables and floors that made it feel very home-y and the old pictures of groups of people that made this feel like a bar that really had been serving people since the 90s.

Jiheon took you and Yeongtae over to a table that housed a small group of students your age and quickly introduced you two to them- Most of them actually already knew Yeongate.

There was Yujin, Sunghoon, and of course Kibum. They all smiled at you, nursing cups of different colored drinks. Kibum and Sunghoon, amusingly enough, nursing very pink drinks.

“You’ve got to get me one of those,” Yeongtae said as soon as he took a seat next to Kibum. Sunghoon reached across Kibum to fist bump Yeongate.

“I can take you up to the bar to order one,” he replied. “It’s good to see you man.”

They both got right back up, and wandered over to the bar that was bathed in warm golden light.

“Do you drink much y/n?” Yujin asked. You thought about it silently for a few seconds.

“Not a lot,” you admitted. “But one drink doesn’t really hurt.”

Yujin got up.

“Let me grab you something… Hm… Fruity?”

You nodded with a small smile, and she disappeared to join the boys up at the bar. You slid down next where she had been and Jiheon slid in next to you.

“Kibum, it’s good to see you again.”

He gave you a smile.

“Yeah.”

He turned to Jiheon, a slightly confused expression on his face.

“I thought Jeonghan couldn’t come tonight?”

“He can’t,” she replied. There was an excited glint in her eyes, that seemed to stress Kibum out a little bit. He mumbled something under his breath in another language that you didn’t catch. Jiheon just arched an eyebrow at him.

“It’s not a big deal,” she assured.

After talking to Jeonghan’s friends for a few hours you were able to piece together a few things about Jeonghan. For one, even outside of Alpha Mu Jeonghan, really was treated like a king. In every story they told he got what he wanted, picked up any person that he looked at.

Most of all they said it was hard to keep track of him. One second he was there, the next… Well, they would have completely lost him, unsure of where he went until he just reappeared a few minutes later, no prompting of what he had been up to.

They almost always paid for him, apparently got him whatever he wanted. It was amusing to hear honestly. The way that everyone would cater to him.

“It’s like they always say,” Yujin stated.

“Jeonghan always gets what he wants,” the whole group parroted as if it had been rehearsed.

“I can’t believe he actually got you,” Sunghoon commented. “Jiheon always said that he liked you but… Well, no one believed her.”

“How…” The commented confused you. “How would Jiheon know that?”

“One time we were all at a party and you were there too and Jeonghan was completely different than usual,” Jiheon replied. “He kept glancing at you, urging the group closer to whoever you were talking to. So annoyed when you finally left…. It was easy to figure out that he liked you.”

“Jeonghan was so convincing though. He said he didn’t even know who you were,” Kibum commented. “Should’ve known better. Should’ve known to just trust Jiheon.”

Yujin looked at her very seriously.

“Your powers are nothing to mess with… You’re insane.”

Jiheon beamed with pride.

“Okay… You’ve got to tell me. Is it really that good?” Jiheon pressed lightly. Your eyes widened as she pushed forward a small glass. You glanced down into it but there was nothing but clear liquid. You raised an eyebrow at her.

“Vodka?” You asked. She frowned slightly.

“Water,” she replied with a point. “But I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about Jeonghan. Is he really that good in bed?”

Yujin gasped, sharply nudging Jiheon in the side.

“Jiheon?”

“What?” She asked innocently. “We were all thinking it.”

“We were not all thinking it,” Sunghoon insistently.

“Some of us have heard it,” Yeongtae replied just as miserably. Him and Sunghoon shared a horrified glance.

“You’ve never…” You trailed off, wondering if it was weird to assume that Jeonghan had fucked all the girls he was friends with.

“Oh god no,” Yujin said, her nose wrinkling slightly. “Our relationship with Jeonghan has never been like that. I think it’s different for him. Meeting people at parties versus in class.”

You hummed in thought.

What you had known of Jeonghan before, albeit not much, was just that he was very flirty. Touchy. When he saw someone… something that he liked then he was bound to show so in his gaze and his touches and all of the above.

And from what you had seen Jeonghan always got what he wanted. You knew that no girl had ever rejected him before. No, that would make news. And you were fairly certain that translated outside of girls and people… The boys at Alpha Mu seemed to always give him what he wanted.

You didn’t always do that for him. At the same time as you did always give him what he wanted, you also didn’t. You knew he would like it if you spent more time with him. You knew that you could do more to be a better girlfriend for him.

“Come on,” Jiheon urged excitedly, shaking your shoulder a little. “What’s it like? Is he big?”

Your face burned in embarrassment.

“I mean-”

“Now, now, now.” A hand came around your neck from behind, the touch light, his thumb in the little dip of your neck. You turned your head back, even though you didn’t really need to in order to know exactly who was standing there, touching you like they owned you. “Jiheon if you want to know so badly you could always just ask to see.”

Jiheon was not embarrassed at all at having been caught in the middle of this conversation.

“Jeonghan can I please see your cock.”

She batted her eyes innocently, in a way that made Sunghoon and Yujin snicker.

“Sure, as long as my pretty girlfriend says that it’s okay,” he said pleasantly. Both Jiheon and Jeonghan laughed at their own conversation and Jeonghan’s hand prodded you to look at him more. You turned so that were facing him, instantly taking him in.

His hair was falling in his face in a way that made you feel like you needed to fix it. He was wearing a loose button up and a pair of slacks. Your eyebrows furrowed slightly.

“Jeonghan, where are you coming from?”

He shrugged off-handedly.

“Partner-work,” he replied with a sigh. “And imagine my dismay, when I can’t find my girl friend anywhere to get the scent of…” His face turned soar. “Kimmie off of me.”

You could smell a faint scent of women’s perfume on his shirts, and it made a small ball build up in your throat. Before you could say anything, Jeonghan pressed a kiss to your lips and elbowed Jiheon lightly so that she would get out of the booth. She slid out and Jeonghan slid in next to you. A pout on his lips.

“All you do is sneak around behind my back to try and find out things about me,” he said softly. Your face burned at the accusation even though… Well, it was true. “You owe me.” He poked you and leaned closer. “You’re going to get punished for this.”

His voice was too quiet for anyone to hear, and luckily for you, you were able to keep your embarrassment mostly to yourself. As Jeonghan had spoken, Jiheon was pulling a chair up at the end of the table.

“And you just invited her? What have you all been talking about?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” Yujin said teasingly. “Maybe if you spent more time with us we wouldn’t have to resort to kidnapping your girlfriend.”

Jeonghan gave Yujin an annoyed looked and he glanced over at the two glasses in front of you. The water… The one with a little bit of a drink at the bottom. You felt ashamed for it but, he didn’t do anything that actually made you feel that way.

“Do you want another one?” He asked you softly. You were going to say no but… His voice was so genuine. So soft. You could feel that he just wanted to take care of you. You nodded. He smiled, and patted your head lightly.

“I’ll be right back.”

He slid out of the booth so that he could go to the bar and as soon as he was away Yujin was gasping and grabbing your arm.

“Look at you,” she said excitedly. “You really are Mrs. Yoon. He’s treating you like a queen.  I bet he’d do anything for you.”

Her excitement was palpable.

“I told you,” Kibum said. “It’s like he’s someone completely different than we are used to when he is around her.”

“I didn’t know he had the capacity to care about someone,” Sunghoon said, and it sounded serious but the way the others laughed made it clear to you that it was a joke. When Jeonghan came back he rolled his eyes, setting the drink in front of you as if he could tell what they were talking about.

“Well, go on… Ask your questions.”

It bothered you the way he answered all of their questions about you two’s relationships but wouldn’t even tell you his major. You could tell that Yeongtae knew. You knew that Jeonghan could tell too, he was just pretending not to notice.

To quell your frustration his hand was on the back of your neck, his fingers playing with your hair as a way to ease you.

It did ease you, and as you were eased you were able to just sit and listen to the way that he interacted with them. He was very playful; his mood was light.

He still smelled lightly of that girl’s perfume.

-

You bid a quick greeting to the Alpha Mu boys in the living room as you made your way up to Jeonghan’s bedroom. It had been a few days since you met his friends at the bar, and despite Jeonghan’s insistence against it, Jiheon had urged you to come hang out again some other time.

And even though he told you a million times you shouldn’t hang out with her, when you asked for it Jeonghan gave you her phone number so that you could text her.

You thought about what the others had said. He was different around you. You wondered exactly what that meant. Everyone was always telling you how much he liked you… It was just weird. You sort of understood the outburst Jeonghan had after that conversation with Minghao. Everyone acted like he was bad at expressing his feelings.

But you thought he was really good at it.

When you walked into Jeonghan’s room he was at his desk, sketching something out on a paper. As soon as you closed the door behind you however he was folding the paper away. You sighed. It must have to do with school.

You walked over to Jeonghan and sighed, dropping your whole body weight on him. The day had been exhausting. What with work, and school. You were about ready to just fall asleep. Jeonghan seemed to sense that in you.

“Did you eat?” He asked.

You groaned, and it told him everything he needed to know.

“Well, you know full well you can’t sleep until you eat. I’ll get you something from downstairs,” he said lightly. “You just go ahead and change.”

Frustration still buzzed in your chest, but you nodded.

“Do you work tomorrow?” He asked you softly. He turned so that he could drag you into his lap. You let him give you a small kiss. You shook your head.

“Good,” he said. “Do you want to spend the day with me?”

You perked up at the question but also… It was suspicious.

“Doing what?” You asked him.

“I have this seminar I need to go to,” he replied. “And then I wanted to go see an old classmate maybe.”

This made you even more suspicious.

“… Why?”

A smile ghosted his lips.

“You remember that punishment that I mentioned the other day?”

He turned and rummaged around in one of his drawers before pulling out what you recognized to be a small sex toy. It was pale pink and had a small piece that was obviously meant to go inside of you. At the base of that it looked a bit like a butterfly. You frowned at it slightly.

“What…?”

Before you could ask more Jeonghan had pressed the item to your arm and was clicking a remote that was in his other hand. The toy buzzed to life, and your eyes widened with understanding.

“I think that’s a fitting punishment, don’t you?” He asked you lightly. “A full day of edging?”

There was an evil glint in his eyes that scared you just as much as the idea excited you.

-

The toy itself fit surprisingly comfortably inside of you. You thought that it would feel akward. You thought that you would be constantly uncomfortable but you weren’t really. At first you were worried that you were walking weird but you decided after he buzzed it on that the fear was solely in your head. Seungcheol didn’t seem to notice that the toy was vibrating or the way that your eyes widened and you grabbed Jeognhan’s free hand in surprise at the feeling, so that quelled your worries that people would be able to just hear it.

In the car ride on the way to Jeonghan’s seminar he showed you all of the settings of the vibrator. A few weird pulsing ones versus the three normal settings on any vibrater that was just increased in speeds. The highest vibration was a bit more than you were used to. You had to grab the car handle when he put it on it your face turning bright red, as you willed yourself not to really react. To practice,

Jeonghan had just laughed at you and switched off the toy.

“You know what to do if it’s too much?” He asked you, as if it were day one. You rolled your eyes.

“I’m supposed to just endure it and say nothing right?” You asked him. The toy buzzed to the highest setting in a blink of an eye. You yelped, tossing your hand over your mouth, your eyes screwing shut. “I’ll safe word if it’s too much. I’ll safe word.”

The toy died again, and you were suddenly able to breath. When you looked over at Jeonghan he was smiling.

“I think today is going to be a lot of fun.”

You were a bit excited about this seminar. Not because you wanted to sit through a seminar but because you thought maybe it would give some insight into Jeonghan’s major. Unfortunately, you were pretty sure that Jeonghan’s major had nothing to do with the history of South Korea and peaceful protests.

You toyed with the pamphlet that Jeonghan had given you, not reading it, but also not quite not reading it. Your eyes grazed over the letters, your whole body prepared for the vibrator in you to buzz to life at any moment.

Jeonghan seemed to know a lot of students here. You were surprised by the amount of them that just seemed… Well, professional you guessed. They were all dressed up with slacks and button-ups, but if you squinted you were pretty sure you had seen at least one of them doing a keg stand at one of the Alpha Mu parties.

“I can’t believe we have to do this class,” one of them grumbled with a roll of his eyes. He glanced at you from over Jeonghan’s shoulder. “At least some babes showed up.”

You didn’t have to see Jeonghan’s face to know that he sent the guy a glare. Only had to see the fear that crossed the guys eyes when he looked back at Jeonghan.

“That’s my girlfriend.”

The guy swallowed so hard his adams apple bobbed.

“She’s really pretty.”

He didn’t try to introduce himself to you, in fact for the rest of the seminar he did anything but look in your direction. Other than that guy, Jeonghan was excited to introduce you to people. As you two took your seats, far in the back, Jeonghan introduced you to just about everyone he passed.

“Yes, this is my girlfriend. Isn’t she perfect?”

You smiled, and laughed like a trophy wife would, secretly anticipating the buzz of the toy inside of you, but luckily you survived all the introductions. In fact, it was halfway through the seminar when, you were comfortable that the toy all of a sudden buzzed to life.

Your fingers crinkled the pamphlet in your hand, but Jeonghan, the masochist didn’t look at you at all. In fact, it was as if he hadn’t turned it on at all.

Well, fine, if he was going to be like that, you were going to be too.

You were determined to be good. You were determined not to let this affect you. You focused back in on the seminar, trying really hard to hear about the testimonies of some of the students but just as you were settled in, just as you were really focused back in the setting went up.

This time your hands balled on your thighs, and you had to focus on your breathing. Making sure that it stayed the same as it usually did even though… You couldn’t really remember what your breathing was normally like.

Jeonghan still wasn’t acknowledging you, so you were still doing your best to keep quiet too. You weren’t doing a very good job of acting completely unaffected. Your knees were squeezed tight together, your lips pressed, your eyebrows furrowed as you tried to situate yourself in the seat in a way that would make the vibrations less distracting.

The buzzing went up to the highest seating.

You let out a small gasp, making someone in front of you turn around and look at you. You gave them a smile and held up your phone as if you had just dropped it or something, until they turned around. Once they weren’t looking at you again, you dropped your phone into your lap and gripped at the arm rests, taking in big breaths as you felt the vibrations warming your body.

You could feel the warmth creeping up your neck as pleasure coiled in your stomach, an orgasm quickly approaching. You shifted, now subconsciously chasing the release that you knew was coming, and then just as you were about to get it- The vibrations completely stopped.

You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding, feeling like you could cry, but remembering to keep it to yourself because you were in public.

You realized suddenly that your body was shaking, so you didn’t loosen your grip on the arm rests until it was down, and you were feeling less in pain for having your orgasm ripped away from you.

Once you had relaxed Jeonghan reached his hand over to you, placing it on your thigh, but closer to your knee then where you really wanted it. He leaned over, his lips brushing your ear.

“Good girl,” he praised softly. He played with you like that for the rest of the seminar. Everytime that you thought that you were safe the vibrations would start. They started off small, barely there, growing until you were so close to an orgasm that you could practically touch it, only for Jeonghan to rip it away from you just before you came.

Your frustration was palpable. You dropped your head on his shoulder, wrapping your fingers around his upper arm. You wanted so badly to come. You wanted so badly for this torture to end, but the day was just starting… And the excitement towards your reward for enduring it all was much to intriguing for you to possibly safe word and get out of this.

You didn’t even notice when the seminar let out, only knowing that it was time to go because people around you were starting to move. You didn’t feel Jeonghan moving so you didn’t either, and the cruel bastard turned on the low vibrations. You barely muffled a moan into his shoulder, fighting hard to keep quiet and hide how good it felt, but not being completely able to.

“Jeonghan? Hey! I didn’t even notice you,” a man said excitedly. Jeonghan shifted, forcing you to look up at the guy. You gave him a friendly smile, hoping that your red face wasn’t that off-putting.

“Hey! Oh, y/n this is Jae. Jae, this is my girlfriend y/n.”

The bastard.

“Hi Jae,” you said friendly. “It’s nice to meet you.”

He held out his hand to you, and you hesitated, glancing at Jeonghan before you took it. Jae laughed.

“You afraid to take another man’s hand without permission?”

The question annoyed you. The way he said it. You weren’t afraid to take his hand without permission. You were afraid that Jeonghan was going to turn up the vibrations the second that you took Jae’s hand. You gave Jae an unamused look.

“No,” was all you said and you stared at him until he dropped his hand and his cheeks dusted pink in embarrassment at what he had said. Jeonghan’s hand came to the back of your neck and rubbed a small circle there before falling into a small conversation with Jae about some class they were in together.

You were able to gather that they were the same major, but before you could figure out what exactly that major was the vibrations turned up. You stumbled slightly, your hand darting to Jeonghan’s wrist. You wrapped your fingers tightly around it, but managed to smile at Jae like nothing was wrong.

You thought you were doing a good job of pretend like you were paying attention to the conversation, but it was distracting as more and more people walked up.

“Hi, Jared, this is my girlfriend, y/n,” Jeonghan introduced. You smiled at him, taking his hand.

“Nice to me-” The vibrations switched up as you two shook hands and your grip on him tightened, your voice cracking. “-et you.”

Jared laughed as you two released your hands.

“You’ve got a strong handshake,” he said with a laugh. You forced a smile.

“I think that’s one of my best qualities.”

You weren’t too distracted to send a glare at Jae.

As the conversation turned away from you Jeonghan changed the vibration settings, off of the straight ones to one that buzzed twice rapidly, paused, and then let out a small long vibration before starting all over again.

You thought it was crueler than the other settings. You weren’t able to get comfortable at all with this one. You were constantly on edge. Constantly squeezing the life out of Jeonghan’s arm. You kept thinking that his conversation was going to end. Hoping really that the torture would cease with every lull in conversation.

But it just kept going.

You tugged at Jeonghan’s arm as pleasure coiled in your stomach. Fuck you couldn’t do this. You weren’t going to be able to just stand here for another five- Even one minute. If he kept this up you were going to come in front of all these people and it was going to be so unsatisfying and you needed to be fucked right now.

You tugged sharply at Jeonghan’s arm clearing your throat a little.

“Jeonghan,” you mumbled. He ignored you. You tugged at him again. “Jeonghan.” Your tone made him realize that you were a bit urgent. He looked down at you, a small smile when he saw the state you were in. “I’m hungry. Can we go?”

You thought that Jeonghan was going to be so sadistic as to make you beg for it in front of all his classmates, but he wasn’t.

“Of course, we can babe,” he promised you softly. You forced yourself to stay calm. Forced yourself not to react to strongly when he leaned down and gave you a soft kiss. You barely registered his goodbye’s to his classmates, instead you dragged him to the top floor, into the nearest family bathroom, locking the door behind you two.

“Please, please, please.” You begged thoughtlessly. Your fingers coming to his pants, and pulling out his cock. “N-Need some relief Jeonghan, need your cock, please, please, please.”

His cock was rock hard when you tugged it out of his pants, just confirmation that he had been enjoying your games the whole seminar. You were hoping that he was as desperate as you were. Thinking that surely his self-control wasn’t so good that he didn’t want to fuck you.

“Pl-Please fuck me Jeonghan,” you begged him softly, you tugged at his cock, your thumb teasing his tip, trying to entice him. He watched you silently, his face showing no indication of his thoughts.

“Turn around. Hands on the wall.”

Your hand left his cock so fast that you almost gave yourself whiplash. You shoved your hands against the wall, and stuck your ass out as Jeonghan pulled down your pants, peeling your soaked panties down to your ankles, and then slowly, teasingly easing the toy out of you.

Your pussy gaped, clenching on air at the last of the toy, and your soft moans turned into sobs of relief at the release of the vibrations. Only moments later Jeonghan’s hands were tightly gripping your hips, and the tip of his dick was sliding between your folds gathering wetness.

“Did you enjoy being played with during the seminar?” Jeonghan asked you teasingly. You whined, letting your forehead hit the wall. “You did a good job of pretending to be unaffected.”

Jeonghan’s cock slipped inside of you, and he bottomed out in you in an instant.

“God your pussy is just sucking me in,” he groaned. He pulled out slowly and then thrust back in hard. “You can’t get enough of my cock can you?”

“I can’t,” you openly sobbed. “I just needed you so badly… Your cock feels so much better than that stupid toy. I wanted to come so many times…”

You were being shameless, but you could tell by the squeeze of Jeonghan’s hands on your hips that he didn’t care. He wasn’t playing with your clit, or touching you in any other way than just to fuck you. His cock making squelching sounds because of how wet you were from the toy.

Without warning Jeonghan was coming inside of you, filling you up inside, and then pulling his cock so that just his tip was inside of you so that he could fill you up completely. You expected him to start playing with your clit now, or to start fucking you again, but instead he slipped his cock from you, immediately pushing his cum securely inside of you with that stupid toy.

You turned around, your eyes wide, your cheeks tear stained.

“J-Jeonghan,” you begged quietly. “B-But I-I-“

“I am not done playing with you,” Jeonghan said, grabbing you sternly by your chin. “This is a punishment remember? You don’t get to decide when it’s over.”

The unless you really need out, hung in the air, hidden behind his eyes. You knew you had an out. An easy out. There would be no shame in safe wording right now and getting to come. Your eyes fluttered shut and you groaned, letting your head fall into Jeonghan’s chest.

“Yes sir,” you mumbled. Jeonghan’s fingers threaded into your hair and he forced you to look up at him.

“What do you say?” He asked you. “I filled your needy cunt with cum and yet I’ve gotten nothing for it.”

You pouted just slightly.

“Thank you Jeonghan,” you said softly. Jeonghan smiled and patted your cheek consdescendingly.

“I shouldn’t have to teach you basic manners.”

He slapped your ass causing you to yelp.

“Now come on, I have to go meet up with my study partner.”

You partly understood why he had wanted you to come with him to see this particular study partner. The one he had mentioned before. You could recognize the scent of her perfume from his collar. She was practically shoving her breasts into his chest, hugging him excitedly when she saw him.

He looked uncomfortable.

You pushed between the two, giving her a smile.

“Hi. I’m Jeonghan’s girlfriend,” you said, your tone short. “How long is this going to take you exactly?

She hated you. She kept sending you glares, as you physically got inbetween them every time that the two got too close. You could feel Jeonghan’s relief everytime you separated them, but it didn’t stop Jeonghan from causing you torture. As they settled into the project the vibrations started all over again. Different then what it had been before. Just short bursts of vibrations in successions. Your fingers balled on the table, your breaths coming in shorter pants.

If his stupid partner thought it was odd, she didn’t say anything.

You wiggled in your chair, once again finding purchase in Jeonghan’s shoulder, unfortunately making it easier for him to figure out when you were about to come.

Always bringing you right up to the edge. And always ripping the orgasm right away from you. It was hell. Pure hell.

And with the cum inside of you, dribbling out around the toy everyonce in a while it just made the feeling that much more overwhelming.

But at least once he finished his project it would be over. Again you dragged him into the bathroom. Again you begged for him to fuck you, and he did. Right over the (thankfully) clean sink so that you were desperately gripping at the ceramic, trying to keep yourself steady.

Another full load of cum, and another securing of the toy immediately after.

Jeonghan kissed you patiently as he waited for your tears to stop rolling down your cheeks, his fingers threading soothingly through your hair.

“You’re so good for me,” he praised lightly. “You’re enduring so well.”

“We’re going home now?” You asked him softly. Another soft kiss to your cheek.

“We have to go catch some food with one of my classmates.”

You really heavily considered safe wording, but the anticipation of how good your orgasm was going to feel after all this teasing, once you had done good for him…

“Okay,” you said softly.

“What do you say?”

“Thank you Jeonghan.”

Jeonghan gave you a small pat to your head.

“That’s my good girl.”

The last and final part of Pathetic << linked right there

---

my heart shaped strawberry shortcake with whipped cream <3

JOSHUA & MINGHAO BEAUTIFUL, FOLLOW IN SEOUL 2023

wonwoo - insomnia zero

I ❤️ DILFS / GOOD GIRL (18+)

pairing: student!brother's bff!seokmin x student!good girl!reader

genre: college au, brother's best friend au, smut (MDNI), bit of crack, a small bit of angst but not nearly as much as most of my fics

description: when you head out for college, you incidentally end up at the one your bother's best friend has disappeared to 2 years prior. now, seokmin has promised your brother, vernon, to teach you and take care of you while you're away from home. unfortunately, it seems vernon should have been a bit more specific about what exactly seokmin was supposed to be teaching you.

warnings: vernon is ur overprotective brother, seokmin is not a dilf unfortunately, dirty talk, masturbation (male and female), fingering, slight restraint?, praise (f. receiving), pet names (good girl is so overused), teaching, innocence kink, corruption kink, oral (m. receiving), tiddie play, alcohol consumption, a bit of pining, shame on the readers part, she feels a bit like a slut for a moment, kinda brief mention of miscarriage? for like a metaphor lol, jeonghan is hot in this, giselle is ur bff and i almost gave up my mission and made this whole fic ab her shes so hot, ok i think thats it

quotes my creative director (@joshibambi): "just admit u wanna bang son", "o is for orgasm", "the urge to be the younger sibling for once"

wordcount: 15.9k

a/n: the way this fic took me years to write. i hav been busy :( thank u 2 every1 who liked girl code uve made my whole year :D hope u like this one 2!!

You preferred to remember Seokmin for how he was.

How he was small and young, how he had a swanky bowlcut and how he looked in his school uniform. How he and your big brother, Vernon, had bonded and watched movies together in your living room, and the countless dinners he’d stayed over for, always so respectful to your parents and you. He wasn’t your best friend, he was Vernon’s, and yet he made it so easy to feel comfortable, so easy to feel like you were the one he came over for. 

You crushed on him back then, wrote countless diary entries about him and his stupid, beautiful smile. But it had been so forbidden, you remembered feeling that, because of how Vernon had groaned at you to leave every time you peaked your head through the living room door, masking your insistent eyes on Seokmin with simply wanting to “watch a grown up movie”. Sighing, you’d turn back to your princess pink room, and the boundary - the Vernon shaped boundary - that stood between you and Seokmin grew farther.

It had almost been a relief when Seokmin left for college. That was the most terrible thing, the relief you felt while your brother was grieving the sudden separation with his best friend. But your heart simply couldn’t help but let out a long sigh - years of yearning for him when he was so close by. You felt that cool wash of repose when that border between you and him had disappeared from your view. Years of watching it, wondering whether to pad closer or turn away from it, became a distant memory. For two years you were almost a normal girl and a good baby sister. 

Then it was your turn to head off for college. The nearest, big college to you accepted your application and you still distinctly remember dinner with your parents and your brother, how’d they’d cheered and clinked glasses and looked at you adoringly, because you were growing up right before their eyes. Then under the faint light of the restaurant chandelier, your mom had said something that immediately sent you hurdling back to that old, distant boundary: “Maybe you’ll see Seokmin there!” 

How had you forgotten? You supposed in that time you’d let yourself be more taken with the relief. It was the thought that he would be gone that had distracted you from exactly where to. And there you were with all your moving plans and your packed backs, and your glass raised and frozen in the air and your eyes wide. 

Then came the reasoning: surely, you could avoid him? It was a big college, there were plenty of people. There was no logical reason you’d really have to see him. Except for Vernon, of course. Ever so oblivious, your brother had called up Seokmin to tell him the good news, and to tell him to take care of you and protect you. And Seokmin was so sweet, of course, he’d take care of his best friend’s baby sister. 

And there you were at college. All grown up.

In your defense, you had avoided him skillfully. You’d turned down his request to help you with unpacking, turned down his tour of the school (that you’d actually desperately needed - why is room 240 not with all the other 40’s?!), and most of all, you’d turned down every single message inviting you to a party. 

I guess to him that was a perk; partying with the older kids. He knew you after all. He knew that you were a quiet girl and you stayed within your neatly laid brick walls, and he knew you were shy, and he knew you needed help letting loose. He knew you were a good girl. 

Which is why it wasn’t surprising at all that you turned down his offers - wanting to stay focused on school. At least, that’s what you told him. Truth was even being in his vicinity had put you much closer to that boundary you’d never dared cross. You were afraid even just seeing him would send you hurdling back, like a leaf in the wind. So you didn’t go. 

For a while, at least. 

“This is, like, a once in a lifetime opportunity!” Giselle whined and you shook your head adamantly. “Absolutely not.” 

“Well, maybe not for you, but for me!” she argued. “I can’t believe you’re consistently being invited to parties with hot, sexy men, and you’re turning it down because of one guy!” 

You were currently sitting in the library with your roommate, Giselle, and you’d made the unfortunate mistake of telling her about your predicament after receiving yet another invitation to a party tomorrow. Giselle was throwing a temper tantrum because she had never ever had anything as ridiculous. 

You liked Giselle a lot. She was very different from you - she was hot. You weren’t - you were cute. Giselle held boys on leashes and made them do homework for her. She liked partying and sexy, black dresses. You were a fucking nerd, and cute was the highest compliment you had ever received for your looks. Even though you were different, Giselle had immediately taken a liking to you. You had initially feared she would think you were lame, but she was so nice - except for right now.

“Come on, Y/n, there are, like, no cute guys in our year!” she said pleadingly, clasping her hands together and pouting, but you shook your head.

“You don’t understand, Giselle,” you murmured solemnly, trying to regain your focus on the science textbook in front of you. 

“I understand perfectly well,” she said and you eyed her suspiciously. “I understand that you’re a bitch!” 

“Alright, that’s unnecessary,” you said, closing your book. You pinched the bridge of your nose, when she went on. “No, honestly, Y/n. You’re a virgin, right?” 

You snapped your head towards her in shock. Your eyes darted around frantically, before you leaned over the table to whisper to her: “How do you know that?” 

“Don’t embarrass yourself, honey,” she grinned, holding back laughter and you rolled your eyes, sighing. “And what about it, Giselle?” 

“How are you ever gonna get yourself out there if you’re constantly caught up on this guy and trying to keep away your feelings for him? You’ll stay a virgin forever, girl. You need to look him in the eyes and realize you’re above that childish crush!” 

You stayed quiet, slumped in on yourself with your book in your lap. Why was she making sense? 

You’d never thought about it that way. That your infatuation with your brother’s best friend was somehow holding you back from exploring and evolving as a woman. That maybe having him in the back of your mind every time you’d shyly made out with guys in high school, had been the thing that stopped you in your tracks. 

“I can see it on your face, you know I’m right,” Giselle smiled smugly from behind the screen of her laptop. “Unless you’re asexual. In that case, fierce, but if you’re not, like, get out there, queen. Sometimes you need to realize that you have to leave one dick for another dick because the other dick is so good.” 

You furrowed your brows. “Is.. Is this still about me?” 

“No,” Giselle shook her head.

“Okay, yeah, ‘cause- ‘cause that didn’t..”

“Yeah, I know. I was more so, uh, angling-”

“Right-”

“Angling the story to- to my current situation.”

“I get it, yep.” 

There was a moment of silence. You pursed your lips and looked at the message on your phone. Then you started typing.

“Are you telling him you’re coming with your super sexy, hot friend?” 

“Yes.” 

“Y/N, I LOVE YOU.” _____________________________

Regret was a nasty, old demon on your back and it had twisted and tugged at your guts, while you let Giselle get you party-ready. You’d sat on her bed, in her dress, and having her put her makeup on you, you’d sulked and tried to shrug off your back.

“You look so hot when you actually try,” she’d giggled, using a fluffy brush to spread the bake underneath your eyes.

“Thanks,” you’d mumbled, and she’d paused her movements, frowning.

“What’s wrong?” she’d asked, sitting back on her knees. You had sighed, reaching a hand up to run it through your hair, but pausing midway when you realized you would ruin the styling Giselle had worked so hard on. You lowered your hand again.

“I’m not sure about this,” you’d murmured and she frowned genuinely. “Y/n, I meant what I said. I know I talk a lot about boys and stuff, but you really shouldn’t let yourself be held back by him!” 

Before you could speak again, Giselle had tugged you off the floor to stand in front of her mirror. 

“Look at you,” she’d cooed, clapping your shoulders. “You look so pretty!” 

You’d smiled a little shyly, looking at your form in the mirror abashedly. You were pretty. Not cute, not nerdy; pretty. Curves hugged tight by a sleek, black dress from Giselle’s closet, this was a version of you that could actually see having sex - seducing men, gaining from her looks.

“I guess you’re right,” you’d said sheepishly, and Giselle had smiled sincerely and you’d let her take you to the party down the streets in a nearby frat house, and you’d almost not wavered when you stood right in front of it, music blasting out of every crevice. 

But then you were inside and he was right there. For the first time in two years, he was there, and he was so hot. He was wearing a white tee and a fucking silver chain, and, God, when did he start working out, because his arms were so big and so toned. And his hair was fluffy and dark brown, and his face was slim, and the tops of his cheekbones were shining under the kitchen lamp, where he was talking to some other guy, arm flexed, as he leaned against it on the counter. 

If there was one thing about Seokmin that had stayed the same it was that smile. He wore it now, laughing, as he talked to some blonde guy about something, and you wanted to scream because, there it was. The boundary, the ledge, the line, whatever, it was right before you again, right there with him. And all the feelings that came with it, your heart, wet and red in your throat, a brew of anxiety in your stomach. 

Without sparing even a second, you’d clasped onto Giselle’s wrist, tugging her into a herd of anonymous people, and just walking. Walking, walking, pulling her along (she countered only with a “hey!”) only for you to hit a wall or something, just as long as you were far, far away from him. 

“What the hell?” she said, when you finally stopped walking because you’d entered the living room, which was apparently more exclusive, as only a few people populated it, including a couple that was making out on the far end of the couch. 

“He was there,” you gasped dramatically, as if you’d seen a ghost. “I-I can’t do this, Giselle.” 

“Relax, babe, it’ll be fine. You’re away from him now, aren’t you?” Although she was trying to be supportive, you could tell she was growing a little tired of your theatrics. You couldn’t care less though, you were panting, and peering over her shoulder to see if he was somehow coming towards; and, God forbid, smile at you with that angel grin. 

Giselle followed your gaze and sighed, brows furrowing. “How about I get us some drinks? Then you can let loose a little.” 

You nodded absently, following her lead when she pulled you to sit down on the couch. You clambered to the couch rest, when she walked away, swaying her hips to the music. 

You might’ve looked different, but you were still you. The entire scene had you uncomfortable, and you were still the shy, unconfident and nerdy girl. You cursed yourself for letting Giselle’s reassurances fool you - you would never be this type of person, and you would surely never get over Seokmin. She’d been wrong about everything. 

“You okay, darling?” 

You jumped at the voice, eyes darting up to see who it was. 

You didn’t know him. He was handsome, though, but you’re not even sure you’d call it that. He was pretty, and he had long, black hair and big eyes and he was giving you this teasing smile, that was doing nothing to ease your nerves.

“I’m good,” you squeaked, gaze moving to a nearby pair of shoes in the corner of the room. You heard him chuckle, before he dropped into a squat before you. One lean hand came up to your knee, giving it a squeeze. “You just look so nervous, pretty,” he sat down an anonymous cup of liquor. “I don’t think I know you. Can you tell me your name?” 

The hand on your knee burned into you, thumb brushing back and forth over the skin and he was looking at you so intently, it had you sputtering. “Uhm, uh, Y/n.” 

His thumb froze. You looked over at him curiously to find this dumbfounded expression on his face, devious grin spreading on his pretty features. He chuckled and cleared his throat, face dropping down before he moved it back to look at you again. 

“You’re the girl Seokmin’s always inviting over here?” 

You nodded shyly and he smiled at you. “I’m Jeonghan.” 

“Hi.”

A pause. Jeonghan squeezed your thigh, watching in delight at the way you screwed your eyes shut. 

“You know, I just didn’t expect you to look like this,” he said finally and, sensing your confusion, he teasingly added: “The girl who’s always turning down parties to study.” 

You blush deepened, cheeks furiously rosy, as you fiddled with your fingers in your lap. “I borrowed my friend's clothes,” you breathed, pursing your lips. “Ah!” Jeonghan gently patted the top of your thigh, nodding along exaggeratedly, “You borrowed your friend’s clothes! I see!” 

He studied you while you giggled at his antics, still refusing to look him in the eye, really. He was almost suffocating, his hand on your thigh and his eyes boring into your face, and his cologne in a constant stream in and out of your nostrils. But suffocation, you decided, was almost better than being around Seokmin and having him parade his kind heart and his thick arms and his sweet smile, and just how off-limits he was. 

Ripping you from your thoughts, Jeonghan stood up, placing both hands on the tops of your thighs and bending down to your face, so his nose was buried in your cheek.

“Look at me, darling,” he whispered, then pulled his face away from yours, just enough so you could gaze into his brown eyes. His hands were much higher now, squeezing hard at the plush of your thighs, dangerously close to your center and only separated by the thin fabric of Giselle’s dress. 

“There she is,” Jeonghan smiled, voice a whisper. His lashes came over his eyes, when they flitted down to your lips. “Don’t you wanna come with me upstairs, and I can make you feel really, really goo-”

“JEONGHAN! GET OFF OF HER, THAT IS MY BEST FRIEND’S BABY SISTER!”

There’s a voice you know.

From across the room, Seokmin had burst through the mass of people, now power-posing with an extended finger in the direction of where Jeonghan was tilting over you, rubbing your thighs, as you sat innocently before him. 

Jeonghan stood up, taking all of his heat and his suffocation and cologne with him, groaning and throwing his head back. “Seokmin!” he whined and he was suddenly no longer so suave and seductive. 

“No, I won’t hear it, Jeonghan,” Seokmin said and, as much as you knew Seokmin to be sweet and tender and lovely, there was this crystal-clear anger in his voice. He walked over, one large hand pushing at Jeonghan. “Go get any other girl and sleep with her, just not her. Get your sorry ass out of here.” 

Apparently Jeonghan sensed the same thing you did - a rare anger in Seokmin - because he didn’t put up much of a fight at all, only smiled at you apologetically (and then, when he was behind Seokmin, gave you a small, devious wink - he just couldn’t help himself). 

You couldn’t focus much on Jeonghan at all though. Because Seokmin was standing in front of you, all muscle and huge fucking thighs by your head, and when you dared to tilt your gaze up to him, you saw how all that anger simply melted away. 

“Hey,” he breathed, smiling softly.

“Hey.” 

Then his eyes darkened, if only for a moment, as they traveled over your figure, gift-wrapped in that tight, black dress. His jaw clenched and he looked around for a moment. When he looked at you once more, he was giving you that smile - the one you’d fallen in love with - and the chocolate in his eyes was melting.

“Come on,” he ushered gently, one hand carefully guiding you off the couch. “Let’s go to my room where there aren’t any scary, evil, mean men.” 

Despite being so on edge, so jittery, as you followed him up some distant staircase, you couldn’t help but laugh at those words. He was talking exactly like he had when you were kids. That was how you preferred to remember him; all small and young and with a swanky bowl cut, and he’s the exact same way with you, hand warm in yours, as he guides you through the house. 

“Why’re you laughing?” he smiled, and you suppressed your own, trying not to dwell too much on how fast your heart was beating. “It’s just like before,” you quipped and Seokmin’s hand squeezed yours in understanding. 

He lumbered down the hallway and at its very end, preceded by rows of white oak doors, he opened his own with a twist and a turn of the brass-blend knob. When he closed it, the party became muffled around you, as if his room was filled with water, and now the rest of the world was a garbled mess, and you were drowning.

His room was clean. You supposed Seokmin had never been the messy type - not even when infected by the influence of Vernon. He had a half-open closet, where you spotted folded clothes, and a circle rug and purple and green lava-lamp plugged in on his nightstand. 

Seokmin apparently did not think it was clean enough, because he swooped down gallantly to grab a tossed sweater, smiling at you sheepishly when he held in between his fingers. You stared at him.

You felt like a kid again. Felt like just a young girl, creeping through the crack in the living room door, and looking at his silhouette, outlined by some grotesque horror movie playing on the TV. His sharp nose, when he turned to Vernon and laughed, his hair, all poofed and tousled and scruffy, and his smile. 

And you’d let yourself fall into this trap, maybe to some extent you’d even wanted it. Because now he was right in front of you, and so was that damned barrier, right by your outstretched fingertips, and you could almost envision yourself climbing over it - climbing into his lap and-

“I didn’t think you’d ever come,” Seokmin said gently, a permanent, small smile frozen on his lips. You coughed, unready. “Uh, yeah, my friend- my friend thought I should try and.. You know, get myself out there.” 

Seokmin studied you, bemused and fond, fiddling with the baby blue sweater in his hands. You were looking back cautiously, as if assessing a threat, but the threat was the sweetest, kindest boy in the whole wide world. 

“Yeah, well,” he cleared his throat suddenly, ripping his gaze from you to fold the sweater onto his desk chair. “I’m sorry about Jeonghan, he’s.. You shouldn’t, uh..” Now neatly folded, you saw him rubbing the sweater between his fingers. “You should stay away from him.” 

“Why?” you asked, and it was genuine enough that Seokmin let out a sigh. 

“You’re too much of a good girl to be with him. He’s no good.”

A whimper clawed its way up your throat, bubbled from the depths of your belly, but you tamed it and settled on a light hum. You felt your underwear becoming a little sticky, and you wanted to die, because God, this was your brother’s best friend. They still facetimed every Tuesday and still played Fortnite together over Discord every Saturday. 

“College going good?” Seokmin asked, retreating from the sweater to sit down on his bed. He looked up at you brightly and patted the spot next to him. It felt like another trap, where the folds in the blanket curved down under his weight, and would eventually lead you into him. You sat down hesitantly. 

“It’s okay,” you breathed, folding your hands and in your lap and tensing your shoulders. Seokmin, fully relaxed and slumped, noted your posture and slid his hand over the exposed skin of your back. “Hey,” he whispered, so intimate it hurt your heart, “hey, hey, relax, Y/n. It’s just me.” 

His eyes were soft and full of concern when he spoke quietly again, his voice almost a backdrop to the muffled sounds of dancing college students: “You know, Vernon was really concerned about how you would do away from home.” 

“I’m not doing bad!” you said quickly, dismissing it immediately. Seokmin stared at you. “I just- this isn’t really my scene.” 

His hand felt searing hot on your back, where it slid up and down, almost coaxing you further into him. He hummed. “Yeah, I didn’t think so.” 

Then: “I’m sorry if I made you feel like you had to come. Just figured you might want that street cred of being friends with the upperclassmen.”

You snorted and, cheeks rosy as ever, started giggling, eyes still cemented to the floor. Your hair was falling gently over your face, wisps of baby hair tickling your forehead. 

“It’s okay,” you sighed away the laughter, “You were just trying to get me out of my shell. I appreciate it.” 

Seokmin smiled at that. His hand dropped from your back and you both stared into the expanse of his room. A small window to let in the rain, the moonlight separated by the grid, and the curtain blowing in a solemn breeze. You and Seokmin sat, both very small suddenly, like kids, on the edge of the bed and became speckled in starlight, in diamond-dust. 

Then Seokmin was doing it. He was letting you be comfortable, letting you slip into a dazed joy, intoxicated from his presence. He was asking about your teachers, exams, friends, experiences, and you were both laughing together, and once again you were forgetting that Seokmin was your brother’s best friend, and he was not with you for you, but he was simply talking to you out of courtesy to your brother. He let you forget.

“You going home for the break?” he asked then, room quieted down from all the laughter. The fall break, starting tomorrow, you remembered. You’d thought about going home, but had opted to text your parents that you were staying, wanting honestly to stay in your dorm room and work on assignments and organization and just lull in bed, instead of being taken up, down and everywhere in your hometown. You shook your head. 

“Really? Me neither,” he said, brows raised. “Won’t you get lonely?” 

You giggled shyly. “Maybe a little.” 

“We could hang out,” he breathed, and at that you tasted the boundary between you, felt it firm under your fingertips, because you couldn’t discern whether he was protecting his friend’s baby sister or if he actually liked talking to you, and your heart beat and yearned and hoped for the latter. 

“Yeah, okay,” you nodded, melting when you saw his smile reach his eyes. 

“Didn’t you always like, uh, Mario Kart? You always wanted to play with me and Vern,” Seokmin said, but he was looking distantly into the window. You almost wanted to cry because he remembered you, remembered things that you liked. “I got it on my Playstation, we can play tomorrow.” 

“I’d like that,” you said.

Then Seokmin was loaning you his hoodie, and, bathed in his warm, tender smell, he followed you home under the moon, glaring at Jeonghan on his way out. 

“Keep the hoodie,” he’d said, smiling sheepishly when you stood in front of your dorm door. “It’s cute.” 

He patted your head and left, thankfully before he could see how red your face was, and how you were absolutely about to blow up from unfiltered joy. You shuffled into your dorm room and tried to soothe the basking butterflies in your stomach and your burning heart. 

Was he standing right across from you on that line, waiting to cross? _____________________________

Giselle woke up just early enough to catch you switching between different button-up dresses, throwing one on, looking in the mirror, and deciding to try another. She was groggy and tired and somewhat hungover, and needed to catch a train, so she could get back home. 

“What are you doing?” she cried, rubbing her eyes. You scurried back and forth trying on another dress, considering white tights, then white socks, then adjusting the tone and volume of your blush.

“I’m-” you gasped in between your hard labor, “I’m seeing a boy!” 

This caught Giselle’s attention. She shot straight up in her bed and looked at you with huge eyes. “No way!”

“Yeah way!” you giggled deviously. You turned around to face her. “What do you think of this outfit?” 

“You look cute!” Giselle praised, nodding to your red strawberry dress and your knee-highs. You slumped. There it was again - cute. Not hot, not pretty, but cute. That was what you were; like a child, like the kid Seokmin knew years ago, like his best friend’s baby sister. Nothing more.

“Who is this mystery guy?” Apparently Giselle was too busy rubbing sleep out of her eyes to see how her compliment had deflated you.

“It’s Seokmin. My-”

“Your brother’s best friend?!” She gasped. It was one shock after another from you that morning. “I wanna say I’m disappointed in you, but.. If you pull this off you’re way freakier than me.” 

“We’re not gonna have sex!” you groaned, pouting as you hastily shoved on your shoes. “We’re gonna play Mario Kart.” 

“Right, this cute guy just invited you over for Mario Kart and nothing else, I get it,” Giselle said sarcastically. 

“You don’t know him,” you mumbled defensively, shoes on and now staring at yourself in the mirror once more. “Cute,” the mirror spat at you.

“All men are the same,” Giselle rolled her eyes and threw herself back on the bed. You snorted and began to walk out the door.

“Y/n, wait!” 

“Hm?” 

Halfway out the door, a tote bag slung over your shoulder and ready to step into the sunlight, you peered back into the room. Giselle, in her sweats and hair fussed, stumbled blindly towards the door. She reached into her pocket and produced a-

“A condom?!” you shrieked, outraged. And not just any condom: a condom in white packaging with the lettering “I ❤️ DILFS”. You truly did not understand how Giselle managed to be a caricature of herself time after time.

“You need to wear protection, he’s in a frat, right?” she shrugged. You glared at her. “I’m not bringing a condom.” 

“Alright, I guess,-” Giselle pretended to think, “I guess, you’ll just have to get chlamydia.” 

You stared at her for a moment, bristling. Then you snatched it out of her outstretched hand.

“You’re unbelievable.” 

“You’re a prude.” 

“Goodbye, Giselle!” 

The condom slipped into your tote with ease to lay snug with all your other items and then you were out the door and heading towards Seokmin’s frat house. The sun was dulled by a few clouds, but it was still shining. Leaves were turning brown and red and yellow and were falling from trees to crunch underfoot - everything was lovely.

But the expanse, in your head, was much different. In your head you were traveling the soft dunes of a desert, spotting in the brown and red and yellow horizon a cleft in the sand. When you reached it, wide and long, seemingly endless to each side of you, you were standing right in front of Seokmin’s house.

You weren’t sure how long you stood there, knuckles white where you grasped your tote, and eyes big and heart pounding. What if Giselle was right? Did you want her to be right? Would you even be able to please him if she was? Half-heartedly you tried to push away the images of Seokmin pushing into you, arms flexing on either side of your head, that spawned alongside the thought. Maybe you straddling him, his hands on your ass, his head buried in your chest, or-

“Y/N!” 

You jumped, clutching your bag tight, when you snapped your head up to the voice. It was Seokmin and he was waving at you from his upstairs-window, smiling so brightly you swore the sun reflected off of his teeth. 

“What are you standing there for, come inside! Door’s unlocked!” he yelled, body disappearing in the window. You stared at the window for a moment, his presence now absent, before you nodded to yourself in reassurance. You could do this, right? Just Mario Kart and small talk.

Truth was, you couldn’t do this. Not even in the slightest. You and Seokmin sat cross-legged on his bed, TV on the wall before it, drinking soda and crunching on chips. Seokmin was drenched in a green, fuzzy sweater, collarbones peeking over the rounded neck, and fingers peeking through the sleeves, where he held his controller, and God forbid, his hair was all soft and fluffy, and he was wearing fucking puppy socks. 

And he was competitive, too. He was leaned forward, eyes narrowed as he sped through the course. You huffed when he blue-shelled you, and you tried to refocus.

“I thought you said you were good?” he teased, eyes leaving the screen for only a second to look at you - you, dress bunched up to your thighs and tongue peeking through your pretty, subtly red lips. A second was all that was necessary. 

Suddenly, his character (baby Daisy) swerved off-course, falling into the pit below and he screeched, seemingly genuinely sad, as your character (Toadette) overtook him, the little gold badge popping up in the corner to tell you that you were number one. 

“What were you saying?” you giggled cockily when you finished the last round, Seokmin unable to quite catch up to you in the last stretch. He threw himself back on the bed in defeat, groaning into his hand.

“I can’t believe I let you win,” he cried.

“Let me?” you repeated in disbelief. You scoffed and put down the controller, pretending that Seokmin lying all angelic on his bed sheets wasn’t making your stomach pinch with static. “Pretty sure that was just pure skill on my part. Don’t blame me because you’re bad at Mario Kart.” 

A blow to his talents in Mario Kart was a blow to him. He snapped his head up to look at you, playfully angry. “Oh, oh wow, really? I’m bad at Mario Kart now?” 

“Mhm,” you hummed, smiling cheekily at him. Seokmin studied you for a moment, before he shuffled into a sitting position. His gaze almost made you shy. Did he want to kiss you as much as you wanted to kiss him?

Seokmin shuffled closer to you and you almost stopped breathing: “Don’t I remember you being ticklish?” 

You were almost so caught up in your fantasy to realize what he said. Your eyes widened in realization and you most immediately tried to twist your body away: a punishment was upon you.

“No- NO!-” You cried out but it was too late. Seokmin wrestled his body into yours, fingers dancing and prodding into your sides. Drowning in laughter, your face twisted into tortured pleasure, as you tried to bat his hands away. Your attempts were futile - each time you shuffled away, he followed right with you, fingers unrelenting as your torso twisted and turned. 

"Hehehehehehe- NO, PLEASE!- hehehehehehe!” 

Your knees pushed with all their might and you were almost able to drag yourself to the edge of the bed. There, you could gain distance and talk him down from beyond his desk. But Seokmin was smart. He sensed your escape plan when you squirmed away, and without much thought, he pulled his body on top of yours, weight pinning you down. 

You were still giggling and squirming, when his fingers finally let up. You were both panting from the excitement, Seokmin smiling down at you adoringly. Then, both of your smiles dropped.

It was like it took a few moments to realize; he was straddling you. Hips pushed into yours, all his weight rested on your crotch - your crotch, which was now pulsating. To make matters worse, the skirt of your dress had ridden up and most of your plush thighs were now visible to him, and your chest was halfway out of your dress, and your cheeks were flushed and your hair was spread out on the sheets beneath you. Seokmin seemed unsure of where to put his hands, while you both stared at each other, breathing in the thick, heavy silence.

“I’m sorry-”

“It’s okay, I-” 

“I really- I don’t know what-” 

“Don’t worry-” 

You were pulling down your dress again, cheeks literally flaming red and bottom lip caught between your teeth. Silence swallowed you both whole. 

You wanted him back on your hips so bad. It hurt. You were aching in quick pulses, but you couldn’t even look at him. Surely, you thought, surely, he’d seen that look on your face, how your eyes clouded over with lust. Maybe he felt disgusted. 

“I better-” you hiccupped, voice small, “I better go.” 

Seokmin, eyes peeking at you through his lashes, feared he made you uncomfortable.

“Yeah, of course,” he mumbled.

You gathered your things and ran out of there, wetness gushing out of you. You tried to run, tried to create distance, but this time, in your mind’s eye, you ran in place, staying completely still by the cleft separating you and Seokmin. You fiddled with the edge, sand cascading into the empty, endless dark. 

There was no way you could make that jump.

That night you wished Giselle was by your side. You wrote an assignment, trying to ward off the embarrassment that stormed in your brain, when you got a message, that plunged you into rock bottom:

Lee Seokmin: hey you forgot smth at my house lol

Lee Seokmin: *Image Attached*

This was it. You were going to jump off a bridge (or a cleft in a dry, sandy wasteland).

As if your life couldn’t get anymore embarrassing: it was the condom. The white condom with “I ❤️ DILFS” on it. You damned that woman for ever making you bring it. What must he have thought of you? His best friend’s little sister trying to get in his pants? Your cheeks were burning and you threw your head into your pillow and screeched. Your life was over. It had simply ended now. There was no coming back from this. You huffed and removed yourself from its plushness. 

Maybe you could salvage it? Thinking on your feet, you replied:

You: OMG i’m so sorry!!!! i think that’s my roommate’s, she must’ve put it in my bag… :/ 

You: I’ll come pick it up ASAP :(((( 

You stared at your phone at the blatant. It was not a far stretch from the truth, but being caught with your hand in the cookie jar - or maybe more so the I ❤️ DILFS condom in your tote bag - it seemed like an irrationally shitty cover up. 

You gnawed at your lip when the three dots popped up next to his picture, and bit it to pieces waiting for his reply. You almost jumped when your phone buzzed:

Lee Seokmin: hahahahaha

Lee Seokmin: you can come pick it up tomorrow if u want? theres no rush 

You glared at the message. Laughter? Surely he hadn’t bought it. He was just trying to be nice, just trying to avoid you any embarrassment. The thought made you wanna throw up, how he felt this obligation to be nice to you when you had permanently scarred him (were you being dramatic?).

You: ok. im rlly sorry again!! i’ll pick it up tomorrow _____________________________

Tomorrow came much faster than you had hoped. No amount of tossing and turning could slow down the passage of time, and by the time you received Seokmin’s promised “I’m awake”-message, the embarrassment hadn’t faded one bit. 

Every discouraged moment of getting ready was haunted by your current situation, and you stopped to cringe every five seconds, causing an honest and diligent self-hatred to bubble within you. When you knocked on Seokmin’s door, you’d honestly never felt less confident in your life.

“Y/n!” he said enthusiastically. 

“Seokmin,” you said, less enthusiastic. 

He smiled at you sweetly, almost as sympathetically, before stepping aside. You furrowed your brow, not really understanding why he couldn’t just hand it to you at the door, but stepping inside nonetheless. “It’s in my room,” he offered, but could he not just have brought it with him? Did he have to prolong the shame even further? You followed him to his room.

In that moment you hated Seokmin for being who he was; for being sweet, gentle, caring, and gentlemanly. You would feel less pathetic if he yelled at you, if he was genuinely disgusted and wanted nothing to do with you. But there he was all smiling and supportive, and he wasn’t touching you at all, but he still felt like pillars on your back, soothing you and holding you up. 

“It was your roommate’s?” he asked absently as you traversed the halls. “Uh, yeah,” you answered sheepishly. 

“I can tell,” he threw his head back to you, and there was a huge grin on his face. A little bit of hope blossomed in your chest. “Yeah, I saw her at that party, you know? I think she slept with, uh, my friend, Minghao.” 

“That’ll be her,” you were smiling now too, and a huge wave of relief washed over you, as he at least let you believe that he thought it wasn’t your perversion bringing along that condom. 

Finally stumbling into his room, he did indeed pick it up from his desk, handing it back to you. You looked at it in his outstretched hand and blushed sheepishly. “Thanks,” you squeaked. 

Seokmin nodded in response. For a moment the two of you stood, uncertain of what to do and caught in the web of a terribly awkward silence. Seokmin’s eyes darted to the window and yours to the floor. 

“Hey, uh,” he giggled a little, scratching the back of his head. “I feel really bad for losing that Mario Kart game-”

You scoffed in response, but the facade of being peeved was falling apart, as you beamed up at him. 

“Maybe we could do, like, a quick rematch?” 

You shrugged, trying to be nonchalant with an ever-heavy flush in your cheeks: “I don’t back away from a challenge.” 

Seokmin won the rematch. This only spurred on another rematch, and suddenly there was no end to the madness. This time there was no awkwardness, no lingering silences. You were just giggling and strategizing, and throwing heat in the direction of your opponents. 

That uncomfortable, clamoring feeling left you, slowly. It became easy to forget it. That feeling that he was only there with you because of Vernon, that there was always some sort of demand, a twisting hand, forcing him upon you, and that you became a sort of burden on him. That was the thing about Seokmin, though, his ability to make you feel like his best friend; his ability to make him feel like he was there for you, even when he wasn’t.

It was only after an hour and a half or so, when Seokmin paused the game. 

“What the hell, Lee? I was just about to beat you!” you whined, crossing your arms. He nodded along, pushing himself off the bed. “Yes, I agree, which is why I’ve assessed that I need a refreshment.” 

“Oh, you’ve assessed?” 

“Yeah, I’ve assessed that I need a fresh, cooling drink in my gullet.” 

You both laughed a little and slumped back, dropping the controller. Seokmin smiled at you, eyes twinkling. “You want one?” 

“What are you getting?” 

“A beer,” Seokmin said. Rationally, you knew you shouldn’t accept. You were bad with alcohol, and everytime you drank just a little, a little easily became a lot. That was why you took yourself by surprise when your voice left your mouth, chipper and grand: “Sure!” 

One beer turned into another, and Mario Kart turned into talking on his bed, slumped into his fortress of pillows and giggling at his stories. You were a little tipsy, halfway into your second beer and your face was flushed and Seokmin was lying on his side, hand propped up under his head, as he made you laugh again. 

“Your kind of partying sounds… Extreme,” you murmured, rim of the bottle pushed against your lips where your words slightly slurred. Mario Kart and alcohol had gotten you a little out of your shell, and now you and Seomin were talking like friends - as if your brother didn’t even exist. You basked in the alcoholic buzz and in this reality, this hideout, where your lovely brother didn’t exist and the faint ache in your legs at Seokmin’s godly face in the bedside lamp wasn’t so utterly misplaced. 

“I think anything’s more extreme than your partying,” Seokmin mused teasingly. You huffed, putting down your beer and smoothing over your skirt. Everything was so lovely and artificially yellow and his body beside yours radiated pleasant heat. He was beautiful, you thought, looking at how the sweaters pooled on his torso and how his brown hair looked so soft and messy. You almost felt the absence of ground beneath you, when you imagined yourself at the cleft again.

“You don’t know about my kind of partying,” you joked and he chuckled softly. “You’re right, I shouldn’t make assumptions.” 

You looked at him and he was suddenly serious. The smiley, gooey Seokmin was gone and his eyes, although not threatening at all, were prodding at you. Your smile fell. The alcohol at this time felt misplaced and wrong, the lightness felt wrong.

“Were you gonna, you know, go with Jeonghan at the party?” he whispered. The world was suddenly very quiet, as if it were following Seokmin’s tact. You grimaced a little. “No. No, not really.” 

He studied you. You couldn’t bear to meet his eyes, opting to look at your hands in your lap. “Why not?” 

A pause.

You began to pick at your own fingertips, nails digging into the cuticles. Seokmin’s eyes dragged from your face to your hands, and he scooted closer to you, only to cover your hand with his, stopping your movements immediately. Suddenly so close, his voice was whispered right in your ear, so soft and so gentle, it felt like a kiss: “Don’t do that.” 

You sucked in a breath, hands ripping to your sides to lay stiff. “I’m, uh, I’m not that experienced, so I..”

Your eyes flicked up to gauge his reaction. In your worst nightmares, you imagined a laugh breaking onto his face, maybe disgust, but you felt yourself melting. He looked at you so softly, like you were the most precious, fragile thing and his hand had stilled in the air after you pushed it off, as if, like the most enchanting artwork at a museum, he fought desperately not to reach out and touch you. 

It was unbearable - how still the air had become, how heavy you felt, how your chest struggled to expand. You talked again, if only to fill the air with your babbling: “I’ve not had.. I mean, I can hardly get myself off… So. I probably. Couldn’t. Get him off.” 

You realized about halfway through your sentence that you should not have said that. That last half of your sentence was a breathy mess, as your voice became shaky with humiliation. His gaze, a delicate constant, was not helping either. You felt tears welling up in your eyes suddenly and maybe that was the worst part. 

“You have trouble getting yourself off?” he repeated, as if to make sure. “Like masturba-” 

“Yeah, that,” you squeezed your eyes shut. You couldn’t tell if you wanted him to shut up forever, so you’d never have to know his reaction, or if you wanted him to talk and be able to sense how this information changed his perception of you. His voice came, in spite of whatever you had hoped.

“I figured you were a virgin,” he mumbled, voice half muted by the palm of his hand, “but I thought you at least masturbated-” 

“I do!” you defended yourself, voice much louder than his and brows furrowing and tears threatening to spill over your eyes. “I’m just- I’m not that good at it.” 

“Hey,” he said softly, hand landing on your arm. You immediately shut up, lip trembling when you struggled to meet his eyes. “Relax, Y/n. It’s okay. I’m not judging you.” 

You nodded half-heartedly, still incredibly uneasy. 

“If you want…” Seokmin’s voice trailed off. His eyes ventured over your form briefly, licking his lips. “You know, if you want, I could teach you.” 

You looked at him silently. He seemed to snap out of whatever loopy trance he had been sucked into, because he was suddenly very jittery and scrambling through the bedsheets. “Uh, I mean- you don’t- God, I’m sorry- it was only if-” 

“Yes,” you said. His scrambling stilled immediately. His eyes were teacups. 

“You sure?” 

You nodded, not trusting your own voice. 

Seokmin squeezed his eyes shut, gulping as he sat back against the bed. His legs spread apart. “Come here,” he patted his thighs. 

You felt terribly sober. All that buzz and butterflies and blaze and blossom was gone and you felt like a doll, moving each limb individually, as you climbed into his lap, back to him. You were unable to think, unable to truly process what was happening, what it meant, as you felt his form engulf yours.

His hands found purchase on your hips and his breath was warm on your neck, as you felt every ridge of his abdomen on your back. His thumbs rubbed against your hip bone. 

“Okay, now show me how you usually do it,” his voice was a warm hum, a twinge of nervousness laced in it. Your face was lit ablaze and you squirmed in his hold, when one hand left your hip to gently push your legs apart. You sat, all open and held against him, dress keeping you covered.

“It’s embarrassing,” you huffed, being very serious, but Seokmin smiled and nosed your hair gently. 

“We can stop whenever you want, seriously, if you get uncomfortable, we stop” he reassured. 

“It’s just me.” 

It was. It was just Seokmin, your brothers best friend, the sweetest boy in the world, who used to have a swanky bowl cut and dorky school uniform and who was always Vernon’s most respectful friend, but he was hot and whispering into your ear and one hand was massaging the outside of your thigh. 

“Should I take my dress off?” you breathed, face turned halfway back to him. His hands squeezed at you in response and you could faintly make out his tongue sliding over his lips. 

“Only if you want, angel,” he whispered back, rubbing your sides tenderly. “We’re not doing anything you don’t want. Whatever makes you feel good. ‘M just here to help.” 

You nodded, and although the answer was maybe made to make you keep your dress on - a reassurance that there was no need to discard it - you removed yourself from his grasp, hands coming to tug your dress off. You felt a small boost of confidence when you heard Seokmin breathe out: “Shit.” 

Only in your bra and panties (terribly mismatched, your bra was black and your panties were pink), you leaned back into his hold, and you noted how Seokmin’s warm hands were much more careful now, splaying out on your bare skin. 

“Are you comfortable now?” he asked quietly. You nodded. He propped his head up on your shoulder, eyes cast down your almost-nude body, chest rising and falling. Your legs were closed again, he noticed, and his veiny hand reached down to open them again. “Show me how you do it, baby, so I can help you improve.” 

You gummed your lip, breathing in one last time, before your nervous fingers began dancing their way to your panties. They disappeared under the fabric for only a moment, before Seokmin spoke again.

“Sweetheart,” he tutted, hand wrapping around your wrist to stop its track. “Don’t just dive right in, you need to get yourself all hot first.” 

Your brows furrowed and some of the embarrassment you felt from being this exposed and pressed into Seokmin evaporated into genuine confusion.

“What? What do you mean?” you said, somewhat outraged, and Seokmin couldn’t help the laughter blooming in his chest at that. He vibrated against your back, hands smoothing down your arm. You pouted: “Don’t laugh at me, Minnie.” 

He stopped, still smiling as he nosed your temple. “I’m sorry, baby,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to your head, that had your heart beating out of your chest. “You’re just so cute.” 

Cute. You remembered your disdain for that word, but somehow, when it came from his lips, it made you beam. Everywhere he touched left behind a hot, burning ghost on your skin.

“You just have to touch your body, sweetheart,” he said sweetly. You thrashed in defiance, crying out quietly with red cheeks. Wiggling your body angrily, you felt his dick half-hard in his pants against your lower back. 

“Can’t you do it?” you whined, wanting nothing more than for him to take over and make you feel good. He sucked in a harsh breath behind you, fingers wrapping around your hands to soothe you still. He seemed to debate your proposal, but eventually he kissed your shoulder and spoke: “Okay, baby, but you have to show me you understand, alright?” you nodded feverishly. “We’re trying to get you to learn.” 

The whole thing had you dizzy, warm and gooey in his hands, and grounding yourself on his solid torso. You had tunnel vision, unable to focus on anything but his warm hands and sweet voice, and how fucking hard he was. You leaned your head up to look at him pleadingly. Even upside-down he was pretty. He giggled at your starstruck expression.

“Look at my hands, pretty,” he tapped your nose and you scrunched it, turning down to your own body, where he sat his hands on your waist. “You do it like this.” 

His hands started dragging over your skin, creating constellations of ghosts on your skin. One dragged across your stomach and down your leg, squeezing it along the way, and the other brushed over your bra-covered chest, landing on your shoulder and collarbones. Then they moved oppositely, then diverged from their chosen paths, and you started breathing heavily. Pressure built up in your stomach and your panties, and you felt how slick started leaking out of you. 

“Feel good?” Seokmin grinned against your neck, listening to the melody of your panted gasps. You nodded earnestly, moaning softly. Seokmin furrowed his brows at that noise, pressing kisses to your neck appreciatively. “Good girl. Such pretty sounds.” 

Both of Seokmin’s hands dragged up to your ribs. There, they paused. “Can I touch your chest, baby?” 

“Please,” you whimpered, and earned another sloppy kiss to the cheek. His hands immediately grabbed ahold of your chest, softly rubbing it over your bra. 

“Does that feel good?” he whispered. You hesitated for a moment. “Um, I don’t feel much, honestly.” 

You’d expect him to be a little angry or defensive, but Seokmin only hummed and nustled himself into your hair. “Good girl. Good girl, being so honest with me. So pretty.” 

You whined at his praise and Seokmin smiled smugly, taking notice of how heated you got from his words. 

“The- the fabric is in the way..” you whimpered meekly, and Seokmin nodded in understanding, stroking your sides soothingly. 

“You want to take off your bra?” he hummed, truly as if it would not expose you to him, as if it weren’t a lewd and depraved scenario, but something as simple as the weather. You nodded, removing yourself from the harbor of his arms once more to remove it. You unclipped it and threw it God knows where, before settling back into him. Seokmin peeked over your shoulder at your now bare breasts, groaning a little and covering it up with a cough. This was about you. 

Seokmin placed his hands on your tits again, massaging and rubbing the soft skin, before he brushed his thumbs over your hardened nipples.

You moaned - for the first time it was a clear moan, seething from your throat and puffing into the air. “Sound so pretty,” he muttered in your ear. “You really like that, hm?”

He pinched your nipples between his fingers, your back arching into his warm hands. Then, as soon as the pleasure had begun, it stopped, when his hands came to rest on the bed. You whined, twisting your head towards his, only to be stopped by fingers on your chin, turning you back forward. “Show me you can do it now, baby. You’re learning,” he reminded you.

 “But, Minnie, I want your hands,” you whined and he tutted softly in your ear. “I know, baby, but I need to know that you’re understanding this in that pretty little head of yours. Need to know you’re focusing. Come on, show me now.” 

Huffing, you placed your own hands (they somehow felt more foreign than his now) on your stomach and began to mimic his movements. You smoothed them up and down on your body, squeezing, then placed them on your chest, rubbing and pinching your nipples. 

“There you go,” he praised, and his hands had traveled to your shoulders, massaging them gently. You whimpered and turned your head to him again.

“Can you teach me how to touch my…” you trailed off.

“Your pussy?” he offered, as if it was nothing, as if it wasn’t vulgar or lewd. You nodded vigorously. Feeling him gulp a little, his hands became a little unsteady as they came to hold your waist again. “Can I hear you say it? Baby?” he asked and suddenly his voice was a little shaky, a little breathless. 

“Can you touch my pussy now, Minnie?” you asked, and any shame had been clouded over with lust. You’d never been this burningly bothered in your life, you needed him to touch you. He groaned, and this time he was unable to cover it up. You felt how his hard cock strained against his sweatpants, how it pressed into your back, and you wanted to touch it so bad. 

“Alright, baby, want your panties off?” His sharp nose was pressed into your hair. You shook your head. “Want them on.” 

He nodded. “Alright, jus’ tell me if you wanna stop, okay? I’m gonna touch you now.” 

His hand slipped under the waistband of your panties, disappearing under the pink fabric. As if they were always meant to be there, his fingers slipped through your folds, coming down to circle your slit in impossibly light figurations. 

“Shit,” he panted, grip on your waist suddenly bruising, as he tried to steady himself. “You’re so wet, baby, you like Seokminnie that much?” 

“Yeah, I do,” you nodded blindly, your own hands coming to grip onto his thighs. His middle finger danced upwards and pressed against your clit, and you immediately squeaked and shut your legs around his hand. 

“No, no, baby, don’t do that,” he frowned, hand that wasn’t buried in your pussy spreading your legs again. You felt how his legs, pressed against you, came to hook onto yours, forcing your legs apart with his own strength. He hummed in content. 

His finger pressed onto your clit again, and he felt how your legs tensed, straining against his to close. Your back arched and you moaned, eyes squeezed shut. He began rubbing it, and it was so intimate, how close you were to him, how his hand navigated your sopping wet pussy, fingers just rubbing you gently, and how bare you were, his eyes training over your bouncing tits when you thrashed. 

His fingers moved downwards again, gathering the wetness that was gushing out of you. Then, one long middle finger pushed into you. Canting into his hand, you moaned loudly and turned your head into his neck. Nosing the tan skin and inhaling his faint cologne, you began mindlessly kitten-licking the skin. His Adam's apple bopped under your tongue.

“You’re so tight,” he rasped, beginning to slowly push his finger in and out of you. His other hand had come to wrap around your waist in an attempt to calm the sudden bucking of your hips against his hand. 

His hand moved faster, obscene, wet sounds coming from your ruined underwear, where he worked diligently into your pussy. He slipped another finger in, and you cried from the stretch. It was becoming hard to contain you, thrashing and writhing against his hold, stuck between wanting to move closer and to move away entirely. His fingers tied a knot in your stomach.

“That’s right, pretty, tell me how good Minnie’s fingers feel,” he whispered hoarsely above your ear. You could almost only whine and moan, nipping at his neck a little. “Tell me or I’ll stop,” he warned.

“Feels so good!” you whined immediately, because if he stopped now, you figured you might start crying. “Feel so, so, so good, fuck, Seokmin, I’m-” 

“I know, baby, I know, but I’m teaching you, right?” 

Though your mind was fuzzy, you sensed what these words meant and panicked, hand coming down to grip his wrist in an attempt to hold him in place. “Please, please, please, Seokmin, don’t stop, please, don’t stop!” 

“Don’t talk back to me, sweetheart. I won’t stop, just talk to me. Tell me what you feel me doing,” pushing your head up again, Seokmin pressed his face against your cheek, so hard, you felt his humid pants against it. 

Your mind was so hazy, so transfixed on the feeling in your stomach and his finger in your pussy, you could hardly respond. 

“Tell me or I’ll stop, baby,” he reminded you again, and you scrambled frantically to focus. 

“Nngh! You’re- pushing in and out-” your voice broke, hips stuttering against his hand, that was continuing its remorseless pace. 

“Yeah, and?”

You furrowed your brows, lips trembling. “You’re- you’re curling them- A-ah!” 

“That’s right. Such a good girl. So smart and clever for me,” Seokmin whispered happily, his other hand slipping down your stomach to circle your clit. Both his hands working pleasure into your pussy, you cried out loudly, head pushed back into his chest.

“Just let go, baby, I can feel you clenching on me so hard. Wan’ me to stay in your pussy forever, hm? Just let go, cum whenever you want, wanna see your pretty face so bad,” somehow Seokmin was just as intoxicated off of lust as you, despite staying, hard and untouched, in his pants. But he babbled mindless praise to you, and you came to his sweet voice whispering in your ear.

Your orgasm sent you hurdling over the edge - the edge, the one you’d been standing at hopelessly for years. You flew across it and landed on Seokmin’s territory; in his arms. 

“Seokmin, a-ah!” you cried, releasing all over his fingers, coating them in your cum. Your entire body arched upwards, as you moaned into the night. Seokmin rode you through your high, pressing sweet kisses into your hair.

You fell limp against his body, worn out, when he finally retracted his fingers from your pussy. You snuggled into his sweater with a content hum. 

Seokmin smiled down at you, eyes brimming with fondness, as his cum-slicked hands wrapped around your torso in a hug, holding you into him. “You did so well,” he whispered genuinely. 

You looked up at him with a tired smile. “Thank you, Seokmin.” 

He held himself back from saying he would do that a thousand times over, in fact, he wouldn’t mind never pulling out - he could live with only one hand. Instead, he pressed a kiss to your forehead and whispered: “Of course, darling.” 

Your brows furrowed and you pulled yourself away from him a little, eyeing the tent in his pants worriedly. “Do you want me to-” 

“No,” he shook his head decidedly. “No, I’ll take care of it.” 

You looked at him with big, innocent eyes, that only furthered the throbbing of his cock. Partially, he wanted to give in so badly. The thought of your hand around his cock, all pouty and innocent and confused, and how heavy it would be in your small hand, had made him cum more times than he’d like to admit. But, he reminded himself, this was about you. This was a favor. “Are you sure?” you asked softly.

“Yes, baby, go to bed. I’m gonna go get you some fresh clothes.” 

You snuggled into bed while Seokmin scurried away to fetch a shirt and some boxers, and when he came back you cooperated limply in taking off your panties, and putting on what he’d given you. You fell asleep in his bed, cuddling his duvet, and surrounded by his scent. 

Seokmin watched you in adoration. How peaceful you looked, chest rising and falling, and a little pout on your lips. 

He wandered through the house, trying simultaneously to get as far from you as possible, and also trying to decide which of his housemates he currently hated the most. He landed on Jeonghan, slipping into his empty room and settling himself on the bed.

There, he fisted his solid fucking cock and bucked into his own hand, eyes squeezed shut to remember how you looked under his hands, how you begged for him, how well you listened, what a good girl you were for him. His moans were trembling and muffled by his own hand, and when he came, he felt momentarily smug, looking at how it dripped over Jeonghan’s sheets (served him right). Then, post-nut clarity sank in, as he reentered his own room and cuddled into you on the bed. 

He felt almost despicable. He felt gross and evil and perverted and lewd, not because of you, but because, as if it were his first time realizing it, he remembered that you were Vernon’s sister. He remembered that he had promised to protect you from manipulative guys and always watch over you, and help you if you needed help, and report to Vernon if you were acting weird. Yet here he was, letting you cum on his hand and groping your tits, as if he was still that teenage boy with that swanky bowl cut. 

After an hour of chewing on his lips and frowning, Seokmin let your sweet perfume lull him to sleep. He dreamt of you. _____________________________

There’s a blissful instant that morning when you wake up, curled into Seokmin’s arms, head nuzzled in his chest. There’s a blissful instant when you tilt your head, staring at his sleeping face, and he’s so beautiful, features all soft and breathing rhythmically. There’s a blissful instant where you see him, and your heart weeps in your chest because he’s so gorgeous.

Then it’s gone.

A panic button is pressed in your head, and your nerve-endings, each one resting on him, begin burning. What had you done? Yesterday feels like a faraway dream, but he’s still wearing that sweater and it grounds you in the reality of what had happened. 

You’re lost. What did this mean for the two of you? Was Seokmin just lusting after you? But that couldn’t be right, you thought, because he’d insisted on only helping you, refused your offers to help him, which now was making you rot in his arms with guilt. Was this genuinely an attempt to help you? To be diligently by your side at the request of your brother? But surely this had been outside of the realm of what was acceptable to help your best friend’s baby sister with? Did that mean he liked you? 

Seokmin awakened from your sudden squirming, as if, with enough shaking and turning, that feelings and thoughts would just fall out of you. They didn’t, they stayed right where they were, and all you were given in return was Seokmin’s eyes fluttering open. 

You watched him go through that same process; the bliss came first and then the panic. Seokmin’s eyes went from adoring to wide and grave and suddenly he was shuffling away from you on the bed, creating a cool distance between you on the landscape of his mattress. You didn’t miss the pink dusting his cheeks.

“Uh- good morning,” he mumbled, and he could only look at his hands. Your throat was unbelievably dry. “Morning.” 

You’re not sure how you both managed, but you went through that morning without mentioning the previous night even once. The air was thick with tension, fleeting glances, and shaky hands, while Seokmin made you both bowls of oatmeal. You stood on the other side of the counter in his shirt and his boxers. 

You ate in his bed. It was silent and heavy and each clink of spoons against the bowl-rims had you both wincing. He put on a TV-show and you sat across from one another, chewing wordlessly to some drama in the background. Your belly was pooling with tension and light cascaded onto you, revealing your pores and flaws. Were you a bad person?

Finally, finally, Seokmin put down his spoon with yet another clink, fingers catching the bridge of his nose and eyes squeezing shut. He huffed into the palm of his hand, swallowing the oatmeal hard. 

“Uh-” he began and his voice cracked, “Y/n. About last night-” 

But you cut him off, and he couldn’t ever, even in his wildest dreams, have imagined that these words would come out of your mouth:

“I want to return the favor.” 

The words were almost spat and discarded, as if they’d been sitting on the tip of your tongue all morning with a foul taste, and you’d only now been able to rid yourself of it. Seokmin snapped his head towards you, a genuine surprise on his face, but he soon wished he hadn’t looked at all. 

You were so pretty, sitting cross legged in his shirt and a blush creeping up your neck and cheeks all shiny in the morning sun. And there was this innocence to your eyes, big lashes shadowing it only a little; this earnestness that told him you really, really wanted to do this for him.

“I-” he chuckled a little, heart clenching at your sweetness, “I can’t ask you to do that.” 

“Well, it’s good that I’m asking you then,” you said, and though the comment was witty, when Seokmin looked at you again, he saw how careful you looked, and how unsure you were of yourself. 

“Listen, N/n,” he reached out to grab your hand, and it was burning into yours, each area of adjoined skin screaming at you with reminders of last night. “You don’t have to do that. I just wanted to make you feel good, I was happy to just be of service to you-” 

“But I want to make you feel good,” you pouted, almost brattily. Seokmin’s gentle expression and tone faded into something darker, as his eyes flitted down to your exposed legs and your heaving chest. He swallowed, putting away his bowl of oatmeal and collecting himself. 

“Are you sure? You need to be absolutely 100% sure-” 

“I’m sure, Minnie. I want to-” you broke off your own words with a squeak, face becoming bright red. You leaned in self-consciously, as if to tell him a secret: “I want to suck your dick.” 

Your whispered admittance had him groaning, groaning at how sweet and innocent your voice was, how you couldn’t even say it loudly, you had to whisper the dirty word to him. He wanted you so badly, wanted to be the one to take away your innocence, to make you all dirty and beg for him, to make you thrash and whine and to teach you how to really feel good. He wanted you.

It’s like a switch had flipped, when Seokmin put his hand on the back of your head, and suddenly you were kissing again. The tension from before was replaced with something wholly different, something hot, something laced in the eye contact he gave you, before he leaned it again. 

And Seokmin was kissing you with a fervor that you recognized from yourself - you both wanted to forget. Wanted to forget Vernon, who, although a great brother and friend, had become a heavy strain on your relationship with Seokmin. So you kissed him and let his tongue in your mouth when it swiped over your bottom lip, and you sucked on it, and you let him and yourself get lost in each other.

The sound of smacking lips and saliva was so lewd too, especially when Seokmin’s hand pulled you from your spot on the bed and into his lap, hands roaming your body, while you tangled into his hair. He was half-moaning into your mouth by the time he pulled away, face flushed and eyes darker and lower and lips swollen red. 

“You gonna let me use that pretty mouth, baby?” he whispered against your lips, one hand palming over his cock through his boxers. You nodded, almost desperately, one hand reaching out to his in his lap. “Can I touch it?” 

Seokmin smiled fondly, looking down at where your small hand was outstretched towards his cock. “Yeah, baby, go ahead.” 

You were a bit clumsy at first, but soon enough you found its outline in his black boxers and you squeezed it a little. Seokmin crooked over, groaning into your shoulder. You felt him get harder and harder against your palm, a small smile at the desperate noises he was making. 

Seokmin had laid his cheek on your shoulder, neck twisting to stare up at you, while you focused solely on touching him, and he hated himself for getting even harder because it was you - you, who he had wanted for so long, who he was hugged into and lying on, while you touched his warm cock.

“You’re so pretty,” he whispered, breathing heavily, and then smiling brightly when you became all sheepish, smiling and looking away, so that you had to pause your actions. He nosed into your neck, regaining some semblance of control over the situation, now that you weren’t touching him, and his breath was warm and humid on your skin. He pressed small kisses up to your jawline, nose flattening against you.

“So, so pretty. Fuck, imagining you with my cock in your mouth, all drooling and shit. Fuck, baby, you gonna let me fuck your mouth?” he rambled, hands finding home on your tits again. You whined and nodded, trying to pry him off of you. Immediately (forever struggling with a little concern that you might’ve changed your mind) he pulls away, looking up at you worriedly. 

“Don’t- don’t touch me, I don’t wanna get.. All hot,” you whispered those words that he had said last night, biting your lip in worry. “I want to do it now.” 

Seokmin melted completely, and in a complete inability to contain his adoration, brushed hair out of your face and pressed a million kisses to your cheeks and your nose. “Okay,” he said in between kisses, and you felt his smile on your skin, “okay, baby. But if it gets too much, tap my thigh three times, okay? If you need anything, if you feel uncomfortable.” 

“Yes, yes,” you huffed, pushing yourself away from him and hopping onto the floor, sinking to your knees before the bed. 

It felt completely unreal - to both of you. How you were suddenly on your knees and how he settled in front of you, bare, thick thighs on either side of your head. Everything was all light and all the places he’d kissed and touched had become holy and glowing on your body. He shimmed his boxers off and you gaped at the sudden exposure of his dick. 

He was hard. Apparently the kissing and groping had been enough, because it slapped against his sweater, leaking silky white liquid from the tip. And he was big - you didn’t exactly have a good point of reference, but you vaguely sensed from Giselle’s words that this was quite a feat. 

And actually seeing it brought a wave of uncertainty on you, not as to whether or not you wanted to do it, but how. So, you blinked up at him with a small frown, voice small when you spoke: “Seokmin.. How- how do I do it?” 

Seokmin practically glowed with adoration, when he petted your head and rubbed your cheek, seemingly so comfortable despite being totally bare. “You just put your lips around it and suck, baby, it’s easy,” he said softly, then added, a little panicked: “And be mindful of your teeth.” 

“But it’s so big,” you marveled, eyes trained on it, and he almost groaned at it, because you sounded so genuinely amazed, so disbelieving. 

“Just put your hands around the parts you can’t reach. I’ll be gentle, baby, don’t worry,” he said. You nodded hesitantly, leaning forward towards it, but his hand in your hair suddenly clenched and pulled you back. You looked up at him and saw his eyes brimming with worry. “You do want this, right?” 

“Yes, please, stop being so- so gentle with me and let me suck your dick!” You whined, fed up with being treated like glass, and tugged his hand out of your hair. Seokmin visibly relaxed at your insistence, nodding. 

Finally, fingers grabbing the base of it, you wrapped your mouth around the tip. You were met immediately with the taste of his pre-cum, licking over where it leaked curiously. Seokmin’s hand found your hair again, gripping it tight to steady himself, as he groaned loudly. You slowly sank down, basking in the whimpers you ripped from his mouth.

“Fuck- you’re- you’re doing so good, baby,” he cried, face twisted in pleasure and head thrown back. You looked up at him and he was so pretty and glowing, panting into the air. 

You sank down as far as you could, feeling the tip sit snug against the back of your mouth, and your hands wrapped around the base of his dick. You looked up at him, experimentally squeezing, and pursing your lips around his dick to suck it carefully.

“A-ah! Fuck!” Seokmin cried, hand that wasn’t in your hair squeezing the edge of his mattress. His thighs were flexing on either side of your head. “You’re- you’re so good at this, sweetheart. Good girl, fuck, such a pretty girl for me, letting me use you like this.” 

You whined at his words, squeezing your thighs together. Seokmin’s hips bucked upwards at the vibrations, hitting the back of your throat. The sudden intrusion was unexpected and you let out a garbled moan around his cock. He panted regretfully: “S-Sorry, baby, d-didn’t mean to do that, you just feel so good. Can- can you bob your head up and down it for me?” 

You did, started moving your head up and down his shaft, and breathing hard through your nose, while your hands squeezed the base of his cock. Looking up at Seokmin, you felt confidence that you were doing something right. He was in heaven, face all scrunched up and breathing as if he’d just ran a marathon. 

And when he peeked his down to you, he could’ve cum immediately. Your pretty lips wrapped around his cock, head bopping with tears in your eyes from the pressure in your throat, and how curious and sparkling they were, gauging his reaction. The groan that clawed its way up from his heart, through his throat and out into his room quickly turned to a whimper. 

“I’m- I’m gonna cum, sweet pea, can I-” he swallowed hard, because even the thought had him close to release. “Can I cum down your throat, pretty?” 

You nodded, a little too preoccupied to answer, but Seokmin got it, and with just a couple more bobs, and the feeling of your wet tongue pressing against the underside of his cock, he spurted into your mouth in long ropes of white, whining at the top of his lungs, and pulling hair from the roots. 

It was, admittedly, a little gross and sticky in your mouth, but it was also hot and you felt proud you’d made him feel good. He was panting, trying to recover, when you pulled off his dick, a satisfied smile on your face. His hand wandered to your face, caressing your cheekbone, before moving down to your puffy lips. 

“Can I-” he was almost embarrassed, “Can I see baby? Can you open your mouth for me?” 

A little confused, you did as told and opened your mouth, sticking out your tongue that was still covered in his sticky release. 

“Fuck,” he groaned at the sight, squeezing his eyes shut and willing himself not to get hard again. “C-Can you swallow it for me, beautiful?” 

Still confused, you nodded and gulped it down, trying not to look like it felt as gross as it did. If Seokmin noticed, he didn’t remark it, because he only groaned again, and pulled you by your face into a sloppy, heated kiss. 

“So, so, so good for me,” he whispered, not letting you out of the kiss, even when saliva dripped down your chin. “Such a good girl, letting me use her mouth, such an obedient, good girl.” 

You whined into his mouth at those words, bothered by the aching in your core that his moans and his blissed out face had caused, and now those words repeated over and over: Good girl.

He grinned into your mouth. “Yeah? You like being my good girl, right? Like doing your best for Seokminnie?” 

“Yes,” you murmured breathlessly, too lost in the feeling of his mouth and his hands rubbing your waist to come up with anything better.

Seokmin pulled away with a warm smile, both hands coming up to cup your cheeks. “You did well,” was all he said, and you could genuinely cry, because that was it - you just wanted to know you did well. 

“I’m gonna go clean up, okay?” he said, waiting for you to nod in response before he pushed himself off the bed, snatching a new pair of boxers from a drawer on his way out of the door. 

You threw yourself on the bed, closing your eyes contentedly. 

He liked you. You were sure of it now, when you thought back to how his eyes had balked at you so wonderfully, how careful and attentive he’d been. You were certain, and your heart smiled and you smiled and your hair was sprawled out on his sheets and for the first time, that desert wasteland in your head welcomed you and took you in, and you were right where you were supposed to be. 

Until your phone started buzzing. 

It was dancing across the sheets violently at someone's call and you peeked open one eye tiredly to pick it up. And when you did, the desert turned on you. Caught in a sandstorm, you held your phone between your fingers and felt your heart drop, lowered into the acid bath of your stomach.

It was Vernon.

Vernon, who was Seokmin’s best friend. Vernon, who was your brother. Vernon, who had always yelled at you to leave his room whenever he had Seokmin over. Vernon, who didn’t like when you talked to any guys at all, who had recruited his best friend to watch over you and take care of you. Vernon, whose best friend had just had his dick in your mouth. 

You heard the shower running distantly when you clicked accept, hoping to God that you didn’t look too disheveled. 

“Hi, N/n!” Vernon cheered immediately on the other end. His face popped up on your screen, a bright smile on his face. You smiled too - you missed your brother - but it was half faded, and Vernon noticed immediately. 

“Hi, Vern,” you said softly. His brows furrowed. “What’s wrong?” 

Of course, he could read you like a book. Of course, he knew that you were distant and nervous. You sighed heavily, trying desperately to collect yourself, to remember how you usually behaved, but for some reason, that you was far gone, and you had to be splayed on his screen, like a person replaced by something peregrine. 

“I’m a little stressed out,” you mumbled. “Got a lot of papers and stuff, that’s why I’m not home.” 

“Come home next break, okay? We miss you and you need to get out of that place every once in a while.” 

You nodded. 

Vernon’s eyes narrowed suddenly, and you saw him lean closer to the screen (which would have been funny, were you not suddenly wondering if there was leftover cum on your face). “Hey, where are you right now?” 

“My friend,” you said quickly - too quickly. “Her name’s Yunjin, we’re working together in chem.” 

Vernon hummed, seemingly content with your answer. “Your friend has the same bed sheets as Seokmin.” 

Shit, yeah, they facetimed every week, you remembered, cringing at yourself for not thinking of it earlier. You tried to play it cool, shrugging: “Weird.”

“Yeah, anyway-” 

Vernon rambled on and on about something or other, but you were unable to focus, watching the door to Seokmin’s room with a worried frown.

Moreover, you felt like a whore. Realistically, you hadn’t even lost your virginity. But sleeping with your brother’s best friend suddenly felt way more real now that you were talking to said brother, now that you were lying to his face, and you felt dirty and gross and you wished you could stand before Vernon, as the same baby sister that you had been before. But you weren’t. You were disgusting.

“Vernon, I gotta go,” you cut him off, and you hadn’t heard a word. Vernon’s excited expression dropped and he furrowed his brows. 

“Are you okay?” he asked, and you thanked the pixels for concealing at least a bit of the worry on his face. 

“Yeah, I just- I really need to get going,” you said. “Bye, Vernon!”

“By-” 

You disconnected the call and gathered your things, put your own clothes back on. Throwing Seokmin’s clothes onto his floor felt like shedding a second skin - a skin that had made you ugly and greedy and lustful. You only kept his boxers on, lumping the dress over your shoulders to drape over you in an unsightly and unorganized way. 

You spared a glance at the wrapped condom on his bedside table, long lost and forgotten by now. You could leave it. You could leave it and have a reason to come back, a reason to slip across that ledge again and fall into his arms and his mouth and his warmth. You almost did. Almost left it right there, where it begged to belong. But you snatched it off the counter, ignoring the way your heart clenched when you did, and slipped it into your tote bag. And you left, jumping across the border that separated you and back into your own wasteland. And it was so cold and so empty. You were alone again.

Seokmin came out of the shower, expecting to see you cuddled up in his bed, all soft and beautiful. But you weren’t there. Seokmin understood immediately. The condom was gone and so were you, only the perfume in his sheets remained, willing him to remember. And he cried. He sobbed into his own hands, because what had he done? 

You did not see each other the rest of that day. Or the next day. _____________________________

Seokmin wanted to let you disappear. He wanted you to slip away and he wanted to forget it had even happened - like a burning star dies out and leaves only a faint warmth behind, lasting years. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t let you go, couldn’t bear knowing he’d never hold you in his arms again, never see you laugh again, never see you cum again. And he couldn’t bear knowing that maybe he’d read it wrong; maybe he’d made you uncomfortable, maybe you’d felt obligated. 

So he texted you. For two days his texts came in sporadically and unsuccessfully. Questioning and pleading, he wanted to know it wasn’t true. 

Lee Seokmin: why’d you leave? 

Lee Seokmin: can we talk??

Lee Seokmin: i miss u

Lee Seokmin: i need to know i didnt hurt you

Lee Seokmin: can you please answer? 

Each text came more painful than the last. Each text came more pleading. You sat alone in your room, in the dark, having only his one sided chats to light up your tear-streaked face. 

Eventually they stopped coming. You thought they would. You thought, you knew, eventually he’d give up. But what hurt the most was knowing he wanted you too; knowing he liked you as much as you liked him. You’d seen it in his eyes, when his hand slipped between your legs, and you’d seen it when he came staring down at you.

But you preferred to remember Seokmin for how he was.

How he was small and young, how he had a swanky bowlcut and how he looked in his school uniform. How he and your big brother, Vernon, had bonded and watched movies together in your living room, and the countless dinners he’d stayed over for, always so respectful to your parents and you. You preferred to remember when he didn’t love you back. 

The pain that had been tethered to your youth and to him, back when he was unreachable, just a figure you could marvel at, was so much duller compared to this pain, the one pulsed in your heart now: the pain of him loving you back, but still being off-limits. Something that could be, but was destined to die out. And it did, when he stopped texting you, you felt that unborn child’s soul leave your own. Alone again.

And then suddenly, you weren’t. 

A stern knock on your door. You flinched at the sound, fearing the worst. You were in your bed, in your sweatpants and your sweater and that condom was on the bedside table, watching the door with you. 

Another knock.

“Y/n, I know you’re in there!” 

Seokmin. Of course, it was Seokmin. No one else would come for you. But it was all too painful. You feared the worst - feared that seeing him, you would collapse into him again, and that this time you wouldn’t be able to find your way back. 

“Open the door, Y/n,” his voice was serious.

“Go away, Seokmin!” you yelled, voice breaking halfway. 

A pause. When Seokmin spoke again, he was not angry anymore; he was vulnerable.

“Y/n. I-I know you don’t want to talk to me, but-” he paused, wincing at himself and you knew there was tears in his eyes. “But I need to know that I didn’t make you uncomfortable.” 

You thought that you could handle the self-blame Seokmin omitted - maybe that’s just because it was words on a screen. But hearing him crying outside your door, and how real he was when his hand knocked vigorously, it tore down each and every one of your last defenses. 

“I need- I need to hear that you’re okay and that I-” 

“I’m opening the door,” you interrupted him, and sure enough you padded to the door and swiftly unlocked it. 

And then you were standing before one another. It was like time stopped, how the air stilled around you, and how the world quieted down. He was all crumpled paper hearts, all deflated and broken, and his hair was messy and his eyes were dark, but they sparkled again, just at the sight of you, and yours at him. 

“It’s not your fault,” you whispered, breaking the enchantment cast upon you. The real world came crashing down, the people in the streets and birds in the trees and wind coursing through the leaves. The light that you’d shut out with a firm tug to the curtains was dancing on your linoleum floor. “It’s my fault. It’s- I talked to Vernon and I- I feel like shit, Seokmin. I feel like a slut.” 

“You’re a virgin!” Seokmin scoffed, but it did nothing to calm you. 

“It felt wrong! Because I- because you’re Vernon’s friend. Because Vernon never likes when I date guys, and because now I’ve been fooling around with his best friend,” you defended yourself, biting your lip when tears stung your eyes. Seokmin softened. “I just felt guilty. And gross.” 

“You’re not gross, you’re in love,” he said softly, and your eyes locked. Everything about him was pleading - he was just short of literally falling to his knees, begging for you to hear him out. “And- and with me, of all people!” 

“Seokmin-” 

“And I’m in love with you too,” his voice was an urgent whisper, not daring to let you speak again, to let you try and steer him away. 

“Of all people,” you mumbled, a small smile finding your lips. Seokmin smiled too. 

“So.. I’m tired of hearing you talk about yourself like this. I’m tired of Vernon being the one keeping us apart. I want- I want you to know that Vernon would understand.”

You shook your head dismissively. He wouldn’t. 

“I know him too! You know? Maybe better than you,” he pouted a little, and it made you laugh, and everything was becoming lighter, and for better or worse you really did want to jump into his arms again. “He shouldn’t be the thing stopping you from dating me- or- or anyone, really. But especially me.” 

You giggled again, and Seokmin’s heart palpitated in his chest at that sound - and at being the source of it. Then the laughter trailed off and your smile tightened and your heart tightened: “I just don’t want to sneak around-” 

“Okay! Say no more!” Seokmin interrupted, hand held out as if to calm a mighty beast. He casually pulled out his phone, tongue in his cheek, as he called your brother. Vernon.

It rang for a few seconds, put on speaker. You couldn’t help the nervousness. Couldn’t help the pinch in your nerves, building up from your stomach and into your heart. Then he answered. 

“Hey, dude, what’s up?” Vernon’s voice glitched on the other end of the line, utterly oblivious (as always). Seokmin spoke, hand on his hip: “Hey, just curious, how would you feel if me and your sister started dating?” 

There was a moment of silence. On Vernon’s end, you imagined it was simply puzzled, but on your end, you stood with your heart all big and floaty, like a balloon in your hand, waiting for him to say that he’d hate it, that he’d kill him, and pop your heart with a simple word to prick. That wasn’t what he said though. Vernon said:

“I mean, yeah, man, I’d prefer you over any of those other college douchebags. I at least know you’d take care of her for real, man, not like that Jeonghan guy you were going on about.” 

Your heart balloon took off, and the boundary between you and Seokmin filled itself with sand. Had it been imaginary? This whole time? You couldn’t help the wheeze you left you, overwhelmed with relief and joy. 

“I know, man, Jeonghan’s the worst,” Seokmin said casually, but he was grinning from ear to ear at your reaction. You’d buckled over in silent laughter, unable to contain the glee. It seemed to dramatic now 

“The worst,” Vernon repeated. Then he pursed his lips and spoke again: “So you’re dating my sister?” 

“Uh, you know, I think we’re making it official in a second, yeah,” Seokmin said and even Vernon could hear the smile in his voice. 

“Cool, man, yeah, I kind of figured, she facetimed me with your ugly ass bed sheets in the background, and I thought, no way, a girl would buy those bed sheets.” 

“Lay off my sheets, man.” 

Both of the men laughed and you did too, crying laughing and covering your mouth to contain. Your chest was fluttering with butterflies and light and love.

“Hey, man, for real, if you hurt her, I know where you live, bro,” Vernon was suddenly serious. 

“I wouldn’t dream of it, man,” Seokmin responded, equally as serious now. He eyed you, then spoke into the phone again: “Hey, I gotta go make sweet love to your sister.” 

“Ew, dude, don’t say tha-” 

And the phone was hung up and Seokmin was laughing with you, eyes crescent and smile wide and toothy, and cheeks all red and shiny, he doubled over and took your hands in his. “I told you, didn’t I?” 

“Shut up, Lee,” you said, pulling him by the hand and letting him kiss you. Letting yourself kiss him. Letting yourself back into his arms, and this time Seokmin had crossed the border, and had fallen into you, and you stood there together and you were in love. 

So, so in love, your lips entangled and danced together, and your hands dragged up the back of his neck and his up your waist. 

And you realized, his tongue in your mouth, this was how you preferred to remember Seokmin; completely and utterly in love with you, and dancing with you in your room, and smiling into the kiss, and hands running up your body. You preferred to remember him as yours, and yourself as his. 

Seokmin guided you to your bed, pulling your body into his lap. Then he pulled away, completely out of breath, and smiling at you like a twinkling star. 

“Think we can finally break open that condom now?” 

“Fuck yes,” you said.

And then you did.

[6:28 pm] ⎯ 심재윤 ⋅ jake sim

synopsis. jake just can’t stop kissing you.

jake x reader | fluff, maybe a little suggestive (but that’s up to your interpretation (⌒-⌒; )) | 0.3k

“jake, we have to go,” you said with a smile as you attempted to push away from his loving grip on you.

“mm-mm,” he mumbled once he pressed his lips against yours once more, shaking his head slightly to indicate he wasn’t done with you yet.

he pulled you closer this time, his hands on your hips, your legs still straddling his lap.

“jake, seriously,” you giggled.

“not yet.”

this continuous pushing and pulling didn’t stop for the next few minutes, with you inevitably giving in every couple attempts; it was impossible not to when your boyfriend's flawlessly soft lips constantly found yours, hands guiding your head and body to move against his in perfect harmony.

but snapping back to reality, you continued kissing him, waiting for the right opportunity to push away. and so once he pulled back just slightly to adjust the position of his lips on yours, you used that time to fully separate from your boyfriend.

“okay, that’s enough, jake! we have to go!” you chuckled.

but before you could even fully escape his touch, his grasp was right back on you, pulling you back into his lap and eliciting a squeal from you.

“the reservations can wait,” he whispered into your ear, sending a rush of shivers through your body from head to toe. “it’s still early anyways. just a few minutes more.”

and somehow, with his words, followed by a smirk that had you melting on the spot, it was enough for you to give into your temptations and dive right back into kissing him again, lips moving right back in perfect sync against one another.

let’s just say, by the time you thought those few extra minutes were up, you two had gone just a little bit overtime and consequently lost your reservations—but in the words of jake, that just gave you two more time for… other things!

a/n. a short lil jake drabble cuz i’ve been holding in my delulu for a little too long atp i was gonna explode :’> just as always tho, reblogs rlly help to support this blog <3 i appreciate it <3

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𝘝𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘰𝘯 𝐹𝑖𝑐 𝑅𝑒𝑐𝑠

♡ Fluff || ୨୧ Angst || ★ Smut || ꗃ SMAU || ⌗ Series || ✿ Drabble || ♤ Mature (No smut) || ✹ Humor

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ Buy A Boyfriend ♡★⌗ -> @sluttywoozi Part 1 , Part 2 , Part 3 , Part 4

Summary: Being a professional boyfriend on SVTHub is great - all Vernon has to do is respond to a few texts, send out a couple selfies, do a stream every now and then, and he makes enough to cover tuition. Things get a little tricky when he finds himself wishing he actually was your boyfriend.

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ By hook or by cross ♡୨୧★ -> @kabira

summary — so you punched a guy, and now he wants you to teach him how to fight, because clearly, you know how to do it better. well, fine, you say. as long as he keeps his distance. (spoiler alert: he doesn’t.)

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ divorce child ♡★ -> @lovelyhan

summary: you like to think that your most recent breakup with vernon ended on relatively good terms. there’s only one issue left to sort out: who’s getting custody of the cat you got together?

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ Cold hands, Warm hearts ♡ -> @duhnova

synopsis: this holiday season, your daughter decided the best present she could give to you was a new boyfriend, which is why she and her best friend yujin have taken it upon themselves to play matchmaker. their candidate? yujin’s father.

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ Operation : Hot girl summer ♡✹★ -> @shuaflix

SUMMARY ▸ the summer you started putting more effort into your appearance also happens to be the summer where vernon chwe's piercing gaze leaves you feeling like you're floating high up in the clouds.

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ Not a virgin ♡✹★ -> @ncteez

Vernon, a friend of your friend spills his spicy sex life and accidentally reveals to an entire group of near-strangers (including you) that he’s had sex one and a half times and that it was sick.

or the one where despite vernon not being a virgin, he is somehow more of a virgin than an actual virgin. 

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ High and fucked ★ -> @rubyreduji

summary: hansol is nothing to you but your ex-boyfriend's roommate, but you still find yourself alone with him while you get high together

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ Risk it all ★ -> @sluttywoozi

Summary: Vernon's got a crush on his tutor, and everything gets harder when you start wearing thigh high socks. Everything.

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ The soulmate service ♡✹୨୧ -> @dkfile

the soulmate service has one purpose: to help those who drew the short end of the stick and ended up without a person to live their forever with. after the heart wrenching realization that the boy you’ve loved since you were thirteen isn’t the one meant for you, you put your love life in the hands of vernon chwe — which, now that you think about it, is probably a very bad idea.

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ Work husband ♡✹ -> @wondernus

synopsis: falling for the young and flirty high school history teacher is inevitable especially when he pays for your groceries and calls himself your work husband

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ Trillium ♡★ -> @beahae

Summary: Vernon is flying in to see his girlfriend. Oh shit, that’s… you. Being away from him for the past few months ago makes it hard for it to feel real, especially after two years of what you both convinced yourselves was a purely platonic friendship. Now that he’s here in the flesh, you are determined to make it feel real. And very non-platonic.

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ Say you love me (i love you) ♡✹ -> @viastro

synopsis: three heavy words. you’re so used to saying this to the one person that’s always been by your side, because you know that he’s your other half; platonically. these words have always held some sort of meaning whenever you say it to vernon, in hopes that maybe one day he’ll say it back to you.

❙❘❙❙❘❙❚❙❘ ⌕ Distraction ♡✹★ -> @minghaoyoudoin

summary: typically, when a person’s house smells like fire, you call the fire department. when your house smells like fire, you know it’s because Vernon is cooking.

[ More Vernon fic recs will be updated ]

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