Hecrtgolden - YOU'RE SO GOLDEN!

Little Women (2019) dir. Greta Gerwig

matilda is sitting on the floor behind the counter, trying to eat a sandwich as quickly as possible. They’re now ‘ down a staff member ’, so she’s doing a shift ALONE for the first time. It is an odd feeling, and she’s trying to keep herself busy as to not focus on or feel the overwhelming grief that comes with loosing a friend. The sound of the door takes her by surprise - of course, their first customer of the day is going to come while she’s trying to have lunch - and she quickly wraps it up before the familiar voice echoes through the shop. She stands up quickly, a smile forced across her features. ‘‘ good afternoon, darling boy ! ’’ its bright, it has to be. ‘‘ i mean, you’re welcome to still do so if you wish, i’ll just close my eyes. ’’

DESPITE LACKING EMPLOYMENT THERE , the record shop would be one of the first places anyone who knew nickie would look , should they be on the search for him. less so lately than usual , but loitering around the shop and bothering its employees ( mainly his sister ) was typically one of his go-to pastimes. wandering through the door , the first thing they noticed was how quiet it was , not a soul in sight. " anybody here ? " they called out , hoping someone might emerge from the back rooms , " hope you know I'm going to start stealing things if I'm left alone for too long. " it was a joke , sure , but one that had the likelihood of quickly becoming reality if he grew bored enough.

CLOSED STARTER | FOR MATILDA YAXLEY ( @hecrtgolden )

(  JONATHAN  DAVIS  +  CIS  MALE  +  HE  /  HIM  )     🠒     PARENTS  by  yungblud  is  something  that  resonates  with  SAMMY  TURNER.   the  drug  dealer  /  bartender  at  glen  ellen’s  local  bar  is  glen  ellen's  very  own   DIRTBAG   who  has  been  in  town  for  fifteen  years  and  while  they  are  only  twenty  five,    they  can  be  very   SHORT  FUSED    but  if  their  friends  mentioned  them,    you'd  think  they  were  more  LOYAL.   in  a  town  where  every  one  knows  everyone,    it's  hard  to  keep  a  secret,     but  i  think  the  killer  knows  that  [  REDACTED  ],     and  it's  bound  to  get  out  sometime  soon.   i  wonder  if  the  killer  also  thinks  of   bloodied  knuckles,  care  bear  plasters,  misplaced  anger,  shotgunning  at  parties,  black  nail  polish,  discarded  baggies,  a  thick  cockney  accent   like  i  do,    when  i  think  of  them. 

full name — samuel alexander turner nickname(s) — sam, sammy. name meaning — god has heard age — twenty five date of birth — april 1st place of birth — hackney, london, england current location — glen ellen, california, us gender — cis-male pronouns — he/him sexual orientation — homosexual

height — 5′11 religion — agnostic occupation — bartender / drug dealer education level — high school family — douglas turner ( father ), katherine turner ( mother ) joshua, caleb, poppy, beau, max, mila ( siblings ) finances — lower working class / poor spoken languages — English 

medical diagnosis’ — adhd, depression, ptsd, anxiety, oppositional defiance disorder

voiceclaim — danny dyer

Inspired by : James Cook ( Skins ), Mickey Maguire ( shamless ), Neil Sutherland ( the inbetweeners ), Nathan Young ( misfits ), alex karev ( greys anatomy )

Tw for abuse, substance misuse, violence. 

- Sammy is the second eldest of several children born to Douglas and Katherine Turner. He grew up in a two bedroom housing estate in Hackney, London. He attended a state school on the verge of closure, he ran wild ran the estate with friends a lot older. He did everything and anything to avoid going home. Nobody saw the signs - or more, nobody wanted to see the signs. 

- Douglas and Katherine did not parent well. They barely existed well. Douglas was abusive in his methods with a temper that couldn’t be controlled around adults or children. Katherine, sweet Katherine, grew tired and fearful. Trapped and complacent. Josh and Sammy basically took on the role of parents to the smalls. 

- Shortly after his tenth birthday the family immigrated to the states. ‘too much trouble over ‘ere’ Douglas had mumbled. 

- Coming into teenage hood, Sammy grew angry. Angry at his situation and the cards dealt to him. He had always struggled in school, but now his behaviour was unmanageable. It was like his body was constantly in fight or flight mode. ‘Defensive, Lazy, Unmotivated - a teachers nightmare’ - all words scrawled across his report cards over the years. they don’t care, Sammy had realised. They don’t want to listen to my screams for help. nobody fucking cares.

- It would have been obvious, to anybody who stepped back and looked at the entire unit, that Sammy had a magnitude of odds stacked against him. Some days all he needed was a fucking win. Somebody to turn around and say that they saw him. Nobody did. He was pegged as a failure before he even had a chance. Nobody cares !! Nobody cares !! It’s all his fault and nobody fucking cares !!

- Douglas only grew angrier with age and the aggression only got worse as his kids grew stronger and started to fight back. Stupid sack of shit - you’ll never win against him.

- Sammy knew he would never win. He knew by fourteen that it was futile to try. He took whatever fist was thrown at him, and he spent his teenage years stepping between his father and his siblings, pleading with his mother to do something. If she couldn’t protect them, he would. Josh had grown useless in his own years. While Sammy only felt anger, he felt a strong desire to step away and keep his head down. Coward - why don’t you grow a better fucking coping mechanism !!

- aside from the obvious, there was another undetected reason for Sammy’s piss poor school performance. He couldn’t read - not well at least. He had managed to skirt by this issue for the majority of his life. He used their own diastase of him to hide the embarrassment. He spoke in jibberish with a shit eating grin when asked to read aloud, made sexual innuendos when questioned about board work and kicked off or doodled on school tests. Fuck it, if they didn’t care, why should he?. Until one teacher did, one who had been eyeing up the boy and taking note of his deteriorating behaviour for a while. He kept him back one afternoon and asked Sammy to read a passage from the assigned text to him. Sammy did the usual - pout and moan and roll his eyes and demand to be let go for lunch. This interaction repeated itself again and again, and after years of screaming to be seen, he suddenly wanted to be left alone again.

- this teacher didn’t leave him alone. In fact, he invested in Sammy. He encouraged him to take up drumming, and payed for his lessons (unbeknownst to Sammy, who assumed it was free), he tutored him after school and once building up some trust he took Sammy for an eye test one afternoon. It transpired that not only could Sammy not read well, he couldn’t see very well either. The opticians where shocked at how he had been going about day to day tasks with one blind eye and the other with intense short sightedness (not that he will wear the stupid glasses. Fuck that).

- Adulthood doesn’t feel too dissimilar to teenage hood, Sammy finds. It’s still just misdirected anger and school runs he didn’t sign up for. It’s still running for your life against wolves, it’s still fight or flight and pre conceived judgements. It’s still untamed loyalty that his teachers swore he would grow out of. The only difference is while he once questioned why the universe just wanted to piss on him, he know understands it’s probably deserved.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

- Exes / hookups / fwb: Sammy is massively touch starved and falls for people very easily (though he will never admit it). He always tends to be the one to fuck it up though

- The teacher: as stated in his bio, this teacher has a massive positive impact on Sammy and changed the course of his life. They still check up on Sammy and is no doubt teaching the other Turners right now. They may even be Sammys call when he gets arrested for dumb shit. 

- best friends: while Sammy can appear to be a pos, he has the biggest heart in the world. He really is just misunderstood but once he builds a connection he guards it with his life.

Enemies: It’s well known this boy likes to throw a punch or two - if you’re lucky it could be you!

Clients: As well as working at the bar, Sammy also deals drugs. The money is mostly used to support his siblings, so really it’s like charity! The more drugs you do, the more shoes there are for the kids!

Potential partners: I have nothing to say but 😢 give him one good thing

THE FALLOUT 2021, dir. Megan Park

JENNA ORTEGA as VADA CAVELL The Fallout (2021) dir. Megan Park

‘‘ yeah, i know. ’’ she says quietly, eyes facing the heavens. ‘‘ it just seems we get beat down a lot more here, huh? ’’  there is a small huff that escapes her lips as she turns back to Bash. ‘‘ you don’t reckon I could take them down? I’m tougher than I look. ’’

‘‘ fuck ’’ she mumbles. She burns with a desire to do something, anything. She was too young to do anything for or about her mother, and because of it her Dad just wonders free. Maybe she can do something now. She’s not sure what, but she has a feeling she’ll have plenty of time to work it out. ‘‘ this is fucked, bash. ’’

ƚαɠ ԃυɱρ!

Florence Pugh as Amy March

LITTLE WOMEN (2019) — dir. Greta Gerwig

THE GOOD PLACE MEME › [4/7 characters] Jason Mendoza. ↳ “I’m just a dope who died in a safe with a snorkel… who’s only now realizing why that didn’t work!”