Ick Setera

i love you im glad you exist im so happy you’re alive

Oh my gosh New Hampshire having actual public transit and not being forgotten by the other states??? Count me in where's the petition!

the extent that i would be at emo night at sneaky dees every single weekend is crazy. you would think i was canadian.

If about 2 billion people celebrate Christmas, and there is an average distance of 3 miles between their houses (accounting for crossing oceans and apartments), that's about 6 billion miles to travel that night. With the way time changes around the world, he basically has 24 hours to make it to every one. 6,000,000,000÷24=250 million mph. Adding that to travel time? Santa's got no chance.

Care to share with the class?

Making my little sister identify random Star Trek characters:

White Bread:

“If the computer ever doesn’t work, he sticks his finger in the socket and becomes the computer.”

“He hasn’t been outside in like, 80 years.”

“He cuts his own hair.”

Charles Xavier:

“He’s Captain Kirk’s father.”

“He comes onto the ship only for parent observation day, and he enjoys a good doughnut.”

Banana:

“He chose his name based on the color of his shirt. When you join the space, they let you pick a new name.”

“He works in the cafeteria, but everybody hates it because he only serves bananas.”

(This child has watched the original series. I don’t understand.)

Martha John:

“She used to be a nun, but she liked the space life instead, so she quit the sisterhood and joined the space.”

“White Bread cuts her hair too, with computer-like precision.”

“She hosts the ship’s karaoke party every Friday, and always opens with ‘My Heart Will Go On’.”

Darren:

“He’s the head of weapons” (said after I insisted that the ship has to have people with practical skills and not just party organizers.)

“When he joined, everyone thought he was so pretty they put his picture up everywhere.”

“He studies aliens but only the little ones.”

Winkle:

“They rescued Winkle from a bacon farm.”

“They give him a spray tan when he feels sad.”

“His job on the ship is he’s an emotional support animal, but he’s also a man.”

Sansha:

“What’s on her head?”

“Okay she studies space bugs, but when she flies around in space her visit only covers part of her face, so there’s bug debris.”

“She doesn’t like Winkle because he’s not a bug.”

“First name: He. Last name: Hears”

“He’s the professional ‘spakeup artist’ (space makeup artist). His job is to make them all look good.”

“Ears are in style right now.”

“His eyeshadow is on fleek.”

Dan:

“Just an ordinary man.”

“His part-time job is fixing the ship’s engines. His full-time job is being a footrest. He sits down and lets people rest their feet on him.”

“They’re not sure he’s human but don’t question him because he might have a deeper power.”

Lieclops:

“He lies.”

“He’s in charge of alien communications because he speaks a bunch of languages, but he only knows how to lie.”

“He has no eyes, only lies. That’s his motto. ‘All lies, no eyes’.”

Doing this to all of you

it’s awesome how we have unlimited chances to become a better version of ourselves

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This is more normal than the time I rode a pegasis through a void in my school and my friends all clapped and were standing on a spiderweb made of cereal and snow

Last night I had a dream I woke up to find that my house had been turned into a Smart House with every wall being a digital screen including the roof so I could see it even laying on bed and the Siri voice said “Don’t worry. You are perfectly safe in your Apple Smart Home™️” knowing I have a BIG phobia of intruders especially at night and it continued with “Let’s explore the neighborhood from the comfort of your home” so it opened google maps and accidentally zoomed past a shitty jpeg of the girl from The Ring standing outside my house and it said “ignore that”. woke up laughing

GRRM may write more women than Tolkien, but as a woman I would feel much safer in Tolkien's world, and around the author himself