Know It's Cliche, But You're Not Alone In These Feelings, For Whatever Comfort That Brings. 💙

Know it's cliche, but you're not alone in these feelings, for whatever comfort that brings. 💙

The next few years are going to potentially, probably, be rough. Every time I think too hard on it I spiral into existential crisis. But we survive. We take each day as it comes. We still try to create when we can, even if only for ourselves to let the emotions flow.

Love your work and reblogs flowing through my feed. Just wanted to pass along some virtual hugs and support.

I haven’t felt this defeated in a long time.

Between the ban and everything else going on, I don’t know how anyone is functioning right now. I’m medicated but like it’s not enough? I’m on 600mg of antidepressants and it’s not enough, hello?

I write a little bit but then I end up hating it so I stop. Nothing sounds right or I feel like I’m constantly fucking Keigo or other characters up. Everything feels difficult and hard. I’ve felt alone my entire life and it is unbearable right now. It’s something I’ve dealt with for years and have been accustomed to, but right now? It feels unbearable, painful. And ridiculous because I’m surrounded by cats and a himbo husband. I’m mad that I feel this way and I’m mad that I have been through so much shit in my life and I’m still dealing with shit. Things I tried to help fix or change, but things I also really can’t do much about.

The helplessness and unease I feel makes me want to go drown myself in the ocean. I was driving over the bridge today and saw the Atlantic and thought to myself, maybe I should just keep driving.

I just want a quiet life where I can just do my creative things and write. And not constantly fight with my depression, anxiety or grief.

I think after Sunday or well, probably Monday after that monster becomes President again I’ll snap out of it. I’m hoping it’ll be like when I started writing we can’t be friends last year. Somehow, somewhere I’ll find the strength to keep going. I’m going into the city tomorrow and I think I’m going to chop my hair off, that always helps doesn’t it?😆

I’ll be all right, just needed to get this out. I already feel better, just wish my eyes weren’t so swollen.