Latest Posts by imaginebeforesleep - Page 5

Natsu: I cut my finger

Lucy: I can kiss it so it'll get better

Natsu: That works?

Lucy: Yeah my mum used to do it when I was little

*later*

Natsu: I need you to punch me in the mouth

Gray: Fucking finally

TW BLOOD!!! Au in which Dimaria actually took Lucy’s eye

I wanted to color this but I lost motivation for it so here you go!

YJ meets C.C.

This is the Young Justice edition of my JL meets C.C. post from a super long time ago.

So basically, like their adult counterparts, the YJ went back in time too. Marvel explicitly warned them multiple times not to goof off too much in the mysterious laboratory, but no, someone happened to goof off too much which caused a time machine to somehow activate and here they were now. They were kinda just wandering around trying to find out where they were. They’re just thankful they were in civilian clothes when the accident happened.

M’gann: *bumps into C.C.*

Marilyn: “Watch where you’re going, bitch.”

And that was how the YJ met a teenage C.C. and Marilyn. Both of which were kinda assholes in high school, think mean girls, but somehow they became the sweetest people ever when they became adults. Here were a collection of incidents between them all.

Other YJ: “You go!” *push Connor forward*

Conner: *begrudgingly walks over to where C.C., Marilyn, and a couple other kids are sitting for lunch* “Uh… hi.”

C.C.: “Hi?” *looks Conner up and down* “Can we help you?”

Conner: “Uhhhhhh…”

C.C.: *stares for a solid few seconds* “Are you autistic?”

Conner: “No?”

C.C.: “You seem like it.”

*silence*

C.C.: *grins* “You know, you should totally sit with us.”

And that was how Conner got accepted into the group. Was it for being autistic or was it for a different reason? He doesn’t know.

or

C.C.: “Hey, you.” *jogs over*

Kaldur: “Yes?”

C.C.: “You’re gonna join the swim team, right?”

Kaldur: “I don’t plan to.”

C.C.: “But don’t you have gills, fish boy?”

Kaldur: “Fish boy?”

C.C.: “I’m not even gonna ask if your mom fucked a fish, I just really want you to join. So just think about it, okay?”

Kaldur: *rethinking everything he thought he knew about Cap*

C.C.: “Oh and by the way if you don’t join, I will tell everybody about the gills. Just in case that wasn’t clear.”

As for why he wanted Kaldur to join the swim team? C.C. was on it. Because I say so.

or

C.C.: *sleeping in class*

Marilyn: *drawing on her boyfriend’s hand*

Kid Flash: *notices and tries to wake him up* “Dude, you’re gonna miss this.”

C.C.: *slaps his hand away* “Fuck off, ginger. I have straight A’s in this class.” *goes right back to sleep*

or

Robin and Artemis: *talking while walking*

C.C. and Marilyn: *walking while talking, Marilyn trips Artemis*

Artemis: *falls* “What the hell?”

Marilyn: “My bad.” *smiles*

Artemis: “Your bad? You did that on purpose.”

Marilyn: “No I didn’t.” (She absolutely did)

Artemis: “Yes you did.”

C.C.: “No, she didn’t.” (Again, she did) “Honestly, even if she did, you deserve it for being so annoying about an accident.”

Robin: “That’s not sound reasoning at all…”

When they all got back, they all saw the Cap in a new light. They also all had so many questions?? Like is he still dating that Marilyn chick? Cap isn’t an asshole anymore, so what happened to make him change? Does he actually think some of the things he said about them??

Also, during their short time together C.C., actually did like Conner, he was the like one person out of the YJ C.C. and Marilyn actually liked and weren’t being assholes to.

A scenario where Shepard jokes with Vega, saying she's practically Garrus' wife now after she promotes him to her XO during the war, resulting in them unintentionally spending a lot more time together.

The joke goes over Vega's head, and he goes to congratulate Garrus personally. Garrus is confused, and Vega promises to keep the "secret marriage" a secret. Garrus now has to figure out how in the hell he accidentally proposed to and married a human and how is he supposed to tell his dad he missed the unplanned wedding and the ceremonial meeting of his fiancé. He was almost 30, but this was going to get him grounded for at least another 30 years or maybe even life.

Was he supposed to get his new wife a gift? Where they supposed to get matching tattoos like Turians? He could've sworn he read somewhere that humans consummated their vows the same way Turians do. Where did he go wrong dammit!?

He adores the idea of Shepard being his wife and loves knowing that she was so excited that she even told Vega about it. He just now has to figure out how he married her in the first place without her knowing he doesn't know. Because then she'll think he never wanted to marry her, and that is NOT the case. Maybe Tali will know? No way. She'd just call him a bosh'tet. Wrex will also call him a professional idiot. Liara won't judge, but he's sure she still hasn't gotten over her crush on the Commander, and he doesn't want to rub his new marriage in her face. Maybe Joker will tell him if he promises him the new fornax issue.

Garrus has had his fair share of giving his dad a pseudo aneurysm, but this one was going to send him into cardiac arrest for sure when he finds out his son married a woman the family didn't even meet. He needs a drink...after he finishes bribing Edi to scrub away everything she just heard him say out loud.

Garrus doesn't know that Vega is the galaxy's worst secret keeper, telling Shepard he's keeping the secret marriage a secret unwilling to let Shepard convince him that she's actually not married yet. She goes to see Garrus to have a good laugh about Vega's idiocy but walks into Garrus telling Edi he will use Shepard's override if she doesn't get rid of something.

Garrus is absolutely mortified and gives the cheesiest greeting to his "wife." She assumes Vega already brought the joke to Garrus but she's not overlooking him trying to be suspicious with Edi. He recovers, mentioning it was for his sesrch history for a gift he wanted to get her. He did intend to get her a gift so the phrase wasn't a complete lie...

She jokes about it and calls him her husband. Garrus, the realist he is, does not take this as a joke. She leaves him to his vices, and Garrus is now in a full-blown panic. He needs to understand what he did, and he needs to know now.

(If my brain gets any more random ideas, I'll at least finish and provide a resolution to this concept, lol. Feel free to offer your own ending)

pushing my princess geto agenda

after mission break

snoopuru

satosugu is my holy grail because how can anyone expect me to read "geto suguru’s body fought back against kenjaku, not because he was alive, but because protecting gojo satoru came easy to him. it was muscle memory” and simply just move on from it

Jared: I want to wake up with you for the rest of my life

Kim: I wake up at five

Jared: I want to fall asleep with you..

Merlin and the knights playing never have I ever

At first, it's innocent stuff and Gwaine complains that it's all dull trivia and they need to start getting into the more interesting questions. Leon looks him dead in the eyes and says "Fine. Never have I ever been arrested" Literally everyone but Leon drinks.

From that point it becomes a challenge to see who's done the most outrageously criminal shit "Never have I ever been in a bar fight" "Never have I ever committed identity fraud" "Never have I ever broken someone out of the dungeons" "Never have I ever stolen from the royal vaults" "Never have I ever committed treason with the King still in the room" And Merlin. Just. Keeps. Drinking. Now it's about trying to find something Merlin hasn't done but one of the others has. The answer turns out to be "Never have I ever been banished from a kingdom"

Merlin passes out before he runs out of criminal things he's done. Magic is the only reason he's still alive the next morning after how high his blood alcohol level was.

After Merlin passes out the knight just look at each other wondering how Merlin hasn't been executed yet with all the shit he's done. Gwaine chuckles and shakes his head "Perks of being the king's mistress"

Tw implied rape/non-con (NO actual rape, just a misunderstanding our son Billy is safe and sound)

Captain Marvel stated on live TV that he doesn't exactly feel romantic attraction nor is he interested in having a physical relationship with anyone, basically coming out as aroace

The reporters asked him why hasn't he said anything about it before seeing how many women (and sometimes men) have thrown themselves into his arms

The answers they got was

"because not many people take no for an answer"

Everyone who watched the live thought about it, Marvel being aroace, Captain Marvel Junior and Mary Marvel, Captains comment

They all come to the same, horrifying and saddening conclusion

Captain Marvel is an odd guy, not rude or mean or off putting in any way he's just, odd

He's almost always hunched over, rarely starts a conversation usually speaks when spoken to, prefers to stand on the side, a huge people pleaser, as if he's afraid to say no to anyone

Dinah has seen this many times before

Trying to appear smaller, not speaking much, standing on the sidelines, always trying to make himself useful

There is no doubt

Captain Marvel was abused as a child

Dinah talked to the Justice League about this and their hearts broke

How could anyone hurt someone so kind and happy like Marvel, especially as a small defendless child

Billy is unaware how his unaccustomedness to his size as Marvel and akwardness affects the Justice League, he's just happy to be included in their group

4am and im thinking about a time travel/time loop au where jason is reliving his death over and over again. its been years since that day in ethiopia, and more than terror — jason is tired. he sees this same event, word for word, metal against bone, blood in his mouth every day of his life. reliving it is no different than seeing it every time he closes his eyes.

until, he notices that the jokers smile growing wider and more sinister might not just be his imagination. then the third, or fourth time the day starts again, the joker changes the script. he can't help but adlib an extra insult in between the torture, too high with power and glee.

and all of a sudden jason is revitalised. in just one second, it's no longer I'm stuck in this horrifying time loop, it's We're in this time loop and I'm not stuck with you — you're stuck with me.

jason discovers new ways to torture (hyperbolically and literally) the joker now that he knows they're stuck in this impossible infinity together for a unforeseeable stagnant future. it starts as a game, only because the joker hasn't yet realised jason's the only one playing. it's too late when he realises that jason can do whatever he wants, because the day resets no matter what, and they'll see each other and jason will be ready with a new way to get his vindication.

very quickly, jason looks forward for the day to start again. he's still got 42 plans against the joker he wants to enact, and he doesn't think his thirst for revenge it yet quelled.

except — a couple miles away, someone else keeps waking up too. this is his worst nightmare come alive. the universe knows no bounds of cruelty and he's barely hanging on to the thread. what is this, the fifteenth, twentieth time he's been forced to relive this horrible day? he can't do this anymore. he's always too late.

bruce can never save jason.

Marvel not Caring

I feel like the few times Billy needs to get something over with, he just doesn’t care. Like honestly, I’m going to connect this to my Marvel Compilations post. (In that post I just talked about how Marvel could be a clip farm and the potential vids he would have) Let’s say these are all from the 8 minutes and 47 seconds of the Big Red Cheese tweaking out vid. Cause why not?

One day, Marvel’s doing patrol. See, he wants to get it done with, hopefully with no major villain attacks happening, because Darla has a school play, and he wants to see her, even if she got cast as a tree. But of course, things didn’t go his way, especially just when he needs to start heading out for the play.

*vid opens up to Marvel floating in the sky looking down at a Female Villain*

Female Villain: *attacking people and causing general havoc*

Marvel: *looks around for any cameras and doesn’t see the one recording the vid*

Female Villain: *sees him and his about to do something*

Marvel: *winds hand back (as if he needed to) and backhands her like an abusive husband*

Any Nearby Civilians: *cover their mouths as they look away. A good chunk of them sped walked away*

Female Villain: *knocked the fuck out*

I’m telling you right now, a good chunk of the comments on that video were something along the lines of ““that’s not right,” I whisper to myself as I speed walk away” or ““You don’t hit a woman,” I think to myself as I step into the safety of my car and drive away.” All stuff like that.

The day after that…

Marvel: “I just ended the problem as soon as I could, guys! I don’t beat women!” Superman: “We know! We know, but did you have to it so… so ferociously?”

Marvel: “Ferociously?”

Flash: “Dude, you looked like you’ve been waiting to do that.”

Marvel: “I haven’t! It was just effective, and I was on a time crunch.”

Flash: “Time crunch?”

Marvel: “Yeah, I had to see this person I know go be in a play.”

Batman: “Hn. You could’ve just said you wanted to see your child’s play. I’ll admit I’ve done something similar when Robin was in a play of his own.”

Superman: “Yeah. If the play thing is true, that’s a valid reason for any father to do that.”

Marvel: *a little confused as to why they assumed Darla was his kid* “Uh, yeah. I didn’t want to miss it.”

Flash: “Who was it for by the way? Junior or Mary?”

Marvel: “Neither.”

*silence*

Marvel: “You guys don’t know her. She isn’t a hero.”

Flash: “Dude… you have another kid? Why do you never tell us these things about yourself??”

Then, there’s another clip of Junior and Marvel. Beast Boy recorded the audio for shiggles and hid behind a wall but was surprisingly met with:

Marvel: “Okay, you know what, Junior? I don’t care that you’re disabled. Put your hands up.”

Junior: “Dude, I am not fighting you. You’re stronger than me.”

Marvel: “So? You’re only a little bit weaker. If you paid Mary like five dollars, I’m sure she’d fight with you. Now anyways put your hands up.”

Junior: “She’s not even here! And, hey- hey- Stop that!”

A lot of crashes and bangs could be heard for about 30 seconds. The video then ended.

Then, there’s another clip of him and Mary sibling arguing, but of course, most people think that Cap’s her and Juniors dad. So, when they say certain things, people tend to view it more extremely.

Marvel and Mary: *arguing*

Marvel: *says something completely outlandish that you should absolutely not say to a child*

Mary: *barely blinks and says something right back*

Marvel: “Oh so help me Gods, if we weren’t related, I would scrape your face across the pavement.”

Mary: “Oh yeah? Well if we weren’t related, I would skin you with a butter knife!”

The two proceeded to continue arguing before they somehow make up mid insult and go get ice cream like nothing happened.

Bonus:

Black Adam and Marvel: *floating up in the sky*

Black Adam: “You know, you’ve never said anything remotely similar to that to me.”

Marvel: “What’re you talking about?”

Black Adam: “I would scrape your face across the pavement.”

Marvel: *nearly has a heart attack when he says that*

Black Adam: “You said that to the girl. You’ve shown more disdain for that girl than you have for I.”

Marvel: “Uhhhh…” *panicking cause he doesn’t know about the video*

Black Adam: “Do you… not take me seriously?”

Marvel: “No, no, no, of course I do!”

In this AU, Marvel doesn’t really throw much shade at his villains aside from the occasional comment and that’s it.

The JL fight a magic user who casts a spell on everyone where their biggest weakness will be displayed above their heads. If Batman takes notes later, then that’s not on him.

There’s the predictable ones like Hal where it says ‘Yellow’, Clark says ‘Kryptonite’, and Martian Manhunter ‘Fire’.

But then there’s the one where you need to interpret like Flash halving ‘Bound’, the Hawks having ‘Clipped’ which pertains to their wings or even the ‘Pride’ on Doctor Fate.

What’s weird is that Batman and Captain Marvel of all people have the same word:

‘Adoption’

Little does everyone know that it’s for two entirely different reasons. Batman can’t help but adopt. Batson doesn’t want to be adopted.

No one knows Captain Marvel is secretly a kid, so everyone thinks he’s like Batman, but just doesn’t adopt (or thinks Freddy & Mary or the Vasquez kids are actually his if they are in AU). But for the sake of comedy, let’s not have them.

Batman thinks there is some kind of kinship, and asks how he battles the urge to adopt? Captain Marvel is trying really hard to not run away (he doesn’t want to get adopted, especially not by Batman, the puns enough are going to be atrocious).

It would look something like this:

Bruce: and that’s how I got all my kids. Or at least most of them. I’m not sure if technically family friends count, but they still got their parents, you know?

Billy, does not in fact know: yeah… darn those parents ammi right

Ollie, wondering if they should put Cap in the JL parent group: oh, do you have any kids?

Billy: oh no, I can’t (Cue misunderstandings)

Bruce: I understand the urge to adopt is real, good on you for not giving in. We live a dangerous life style

Billy: We’ll we can’t help the fae brain

Bruce: the what?

Billy, he just heard the term before and thought it was the common word: you know, when you just want to keep and raise a kid for yourself

Bruce, thinking of the numerous tales of witches and fae using first born children as payment only to realise it’s their way of adoption: … huh

Billy, just wants to escape and hug his tiger: oh it’s really fine. Anyways I need to bounce, but we’ll see each other on Mondays meeting

Proceeds to ruffle everyone’s hair (he can’t help it, he’s taller than anyone and enjoys the feeling of ruffling hair instead of having his hair ruffled)

Batman: oh OH

Cue most misunderstanding where they think Marvel mentally adopted them. They all have daddy issues anyways, so it really shouldn’t be a surprise when they try to be the fae brain favourite.

HAHA YOU THOUGHT YOU WERENT GETTING DAD MARVEL, BUT JUMPED ON THAT BANDWAGON THE SECOND IT CAME OUT

Marvel Cursing

You see, Marvel cursing, is a rare occurrence as the man’s swear vocabulary normally consists of “holy moly” and “oh my days” and “good gravy” and just things along those lines. So much so that JL kind of forgets that he can curse as he’s (supposedly) a grown ass man. As a result of this, it will give them major whiplash when Marvel does curse. And just for me, myself and I, whenever this happens, he pulls out the most midwestern accent ever. I say this cause Fawcett is somewhere in the Midwest.

Like let’s say Constantine and Marvel are talking and Clark is nearby doing whatever and after a bit, their conversation ends and Constantine walks off. As the blonde man is leaving, Clark hears Marvel fake a cough and mutter “bitchass” under his breath. It’s safe to say Billy’s still a little (a lot) mad about Constantine trying to take the living lightning from him. But anyways, hearing this, Supes stops whatever he was doing and slowly looks over to Marvel who’s kinda not really but also definitely glaring at Constantine as the man left. For the rest of the day, Clark kept side eying Marvel to see if he was mind controlled but then he remembered the Cap was a grown ass man and that he could cuss if he pleased. (None of the league knows he’s a child guys)

Or another time when Marvel was talking to Mary in the kitchen of Mount Justice. Kid Flash sped by just in time to hear Marvel say something along the lines of “Christ on a cross, what a dumb cunt” while sounding so disappointed in whoever that was directed at. Wally poked his head into the kitchen to see the two, Mary sitting by the counter and Marvel making some type of dessert. He was wearing a lightning bolt patterned apron and everything.

Kid Flash: “Heeeey guys… Whatcha talking about?” *has never heard Marvel curse once in his entire time of being their den mother so he’s naturally a little concerned*

Mary and Marvel: *share look before looking back at Kid Flash*

Mary: “We were talking about… uh… Your guy’s recent performance in field!” (They weren’t. They were actually talking about some crackhead who lived nearby them.)

Marvel: “Yeah, that.” *stops stirring batter in a bowl* “By the way, I’m making cookies, you want some later?”

Kid Flash: “Oh. Uh… yeah. Igottagobye.” *zooms off to the lounge*

Marvel and Mary: *both confused at the sudden departure, but shrug it off and go back to talking about the crackhead*

Kid Flash: *now in the lounge* “Guys- Guys!”

Other YJ members: “What?”

Kid Flash: “Marvel thinks one of us is dumb cunt!”

Other YJ members: “WHAT?”

They all ended up trying to do that thing where you subtly ask someone for information like “Hey, Marvel, how’d you think we all did during the last mission?” “You all did wonderful!” Safe to say it doesn’t really help them. Also neither Mary, nor Billy realize they just made these kids more insecure than their teenage brains naturally make them.

time travel fanfic idea where Jason comes back to before he was adopted, him and Batman still meet and he still ends up being adopted by Bruce Wayne, but he just refuses to acknowledge Batman and Robin, he acts like a civilian boy, he has over thirteen extracurriculars that Bruce does his best to keep up with. He regularly works out and trains all the fighting he's learned over the years, he goes on a gap year before college to recuperate the all blades and pretends to be the civilian in a family of crime fighting vigilantes.

He's doing pre-med and keeps nagging his siblings to go to college too (Cass, Tim), Duke is the one who spends more time with him bc everyone else is nocturnal and sleep through the day, but Jason likes to drive Duke to his classes and pick him up so they can have lunch together, Damian had a hard time at first, because Jason speaks every language that he speaks and all bat related things have to stay at the cave, his league training didn't prepare him for a civilian brother.

During an attempted kidnapping during one of the Wayne galas, Jason's whole plan almost gets blow up because one of the guys has taken a woman hostage and his Red Hood fried brain just pounced on the dude with all his might, wrestled him for the gun and kept him stuck under his boot with the gun pointed between the guys brows.

He had to pretend to be scared when Batman came to the rescue and act like he didn't know how to handle a gun.

+ Alfred 100% thinks Jason was on a children gang and that's why he's so good with knives, guns and rifles, but who's he to say anything about people's past

I love that in Catching fire Katniss comes to the conclusion the other tributes are trying to keep Peeta alive because they must see how amazingly perfectly wonderful he is. When in actuality that’s just her having a crush and everyone else recognizing that if Peeta gets hurt Katniss will go fully feral and unhinged and probably try to kill everyone and then herself.

JL meets C.C.

So, the Justice League goes back in time to 1957 because some villain, let’s say Lex Luthor travelled to back then too for whatever reason. So now they have to stop him. Cue shenanigans and then while they’re trying to find Lex, John (I think this is my first post with John Stewart as GL) sees a newspaper that has C.C. and Marilyn on it. The newspaper talks about an Incan artifact they found. As they have literally nowhere to go, they go to see if C.C. can help them as they could use the extra firepower. (They think he’s Marvel and also literally everyone is against them, Lex turned the government against them by calling them foreign invaders. Remember this is both less than 15 years after WW2, and this is also two years into Vietnam.) C.C. would get dragged along because Lex thinks he’s Marvel so he’d also get shot at and all that. Here’s some interactions I think would happen:

Batman: *Takes off cowl because there’s no way Marvel should know him, and future Marvel already knows his identity*

C.C.: *stares at Bruce for a bit and thinks he’s Thomas Wayne* “Hey… you’re Patrick’s boy, right? Why’re you running around in a bat costume? Also how did you age thirty years in the two months since I last saw you?”

(Let’s say this is the same universe as the Great Grandpa Wayne and C.C. post)

Batman: *Gets flashbacks*

or

*Under heavy fire from robots because Lex teamed up with the government to mass produce robots for the war effort, money and so he could kill them. C.C., Flash, and GL are all kinda laying on the floor while bullets rain above them*

C.C.: (By the way, all of them are yelling over the sound of the bullets, cause bullets are really loud) “Can we wrap this up? I want to get back to my wife.”

Flash: “You have a wife?!” *completely shocked and betrayed one of his best buddies didn’t tell him this*

C.C.: *grabs some stuff from around them and starts making something* “Yeah.” *pauses his making his thing and sighs dreamily* “Marilyn.” (Bro really loves his wife) *goes back to making whatever he’s making*

GL: “What’re making?”

C.C.: “What?”

(Again, they’re yelling over a bunch of bullets)

GL: “What are you making?”

C.C.: “Oh! A shrapnel grenade!” *Finishes and throws it out of one of the many holes made by the bullets*

*loud explosion, guns stop. The three lay on their stomachs on the ground in silence*

GL: “Why do you know how to make that?”

C.C.: “I wasn’t able to dodge the draft.”

or

C.C.: “You’re an Atlantean?” *Slowly looks over to Arthur* “Tell me everything.” *pulls out pocket notebook that’s decorated with stickers, courtesy of a seven year old Mary*

Aquaman: *Happy to share anything about his culture and people* “I can tell you anything but its location.”

C.C.: “Fine by me! I just want to know everything.” *suddenly gets super intense*

*League looks at each other cause this is a rare time Marvel is actually actually serious*

max “had a crush on sandra for years to the point where everyone knew about it except for sandra” bennett and sandra “dated max for 4 months and already started planning her proposal” wilkinson. btw. if you even care.

Angst idea for billy batfam: for whatever reason billy is given a punishment from Bruce: no magic until told otherwise. No spells. No heroing. No magic

The problem is that Bruce doesn't understand magic and doesn't understand that billy isn't like zatanna or constantine, he can't just not do magic. 6 gods, the living Lightning and the magic of eternity all bottle up inside a malnourished little kid? It'll burn him alive

but... he's learned better than say no to a pissed off adult

The gods make the executive decision: billy can't stay here. Not anymore.

Ooooh this is good. Thank you for the ask!

Oh, the “no heroing” punishment alone is bad. Because that infringes on his responsibilities within the Magic community. He has work to do damnit!

But no magic? That is basically a death sentence. No joke, asking someone who is so intrinsically tied to magic to NOT use it, is not going to end well.

And the worst thing is, Bruce thinks this is for the best. He still doesn’t get magic after so many years because he doesn’t want to. All magic brings is chaos and a headache. He toned his hate down for Billy, but it’s still there. He’s worried that magic will ruin his new son’s life, so he decides to separate them, like you would your kid from a toxic friend.

But it’s eating Billy up inside. Now, he has voices in his head yelling at him to use his powers. He has magic practically boiling within his very core, hitting along every inch of his inner muscles. He feels like he’s burning up. Like he’s eaten so much that he can’t eat anymore.

Still, he doesn’t say anything. He knows better. After so many foster and group homes that promise they’ll be better than the last, this one feels different somehow. He has hope. It’s not a lot, but it’s there. If he says or does anything to ruin that, it’ll only be his fault.

But his patrons think otherwise.

They acknowledge that these vigilantes have good intentions, for humans. But ultimately, Billy’s wellbeing matters the most. And if he continues to not use his magic, he won’t survive to the next year. It’s like asking him to not take medicine. To not sleep. To not eat or drink.

At some point, the Batman’s intentions don’t matter. Billy needs to go to the Rock immediately. Zeus apologizes profusely before piloting his body and teleporting all the way to the Subway to Eternity.

He can’t stay, they tell him. And, despite wanting a family more than anything, Billy knows they’re right.

*cue Captain Marvel avoiding being in a room alone with Batman and any of his batgirls or robins.*

(Shot opens in Magicians Meeting Hall)

Captain Marvel: *strolls inside toward his seat and unpacks from his little satchel. Stops and greets other magic-users before pulling out notebooks and pencils*

(Cut to Billy on the couch)

Billy: So, over the weekend, I might’ve made a slightly impulsive decision

(Cut back to CM unpacking a mug that reads *#1 DAD!*)

Billy: I mean, I don’t regret it. I just wish I didn’t have to keep my identity a secret, ya know?

(Cuts to Cap smiling at the mug)

(Cuts back to Billy on the couch)

Billy: *holding a photo of Conner/Kon-El(Superboy)This is my son. Isn’t he great? He can already leap tall buildings in a single bound!

(Cuts back to Meeting Hall. Camera pans to New God Metron, swiping away at unreadable documents)

(Cuts to Metron on the couch)

Metron: It’s real. It’s all real. I don’t even…I don’t understand what is going on inside that head of his

(Cut to Satanus in the Meeting Hall, doing his damn best to not laugh)

(Cut to Satanus on the couch)

Satanus: He’s—Pfft—He’s grown up so much! I actually—Shit, I can’t wait to tell Blaze about this.

(Cuts to Blaze on the couch)

Lady Blaze: 😦

Lady Blaze: You’re kidding

(Everyone watches Marvel sip water from the mug. He stares back)

Captain Marvel: What?

Fate: Nothing. Nothing at all

Captain Marvel: You sure?

(Camera pans to Metron, still swiping)

Captain Marvel: He doesn’t look so good.

(Cuts to Billy on the couch)

Billy: he actually reminds me of my uncle after he has too much beer, but I don’t want to seem rude. I’m a dad now.

(Cuts to Satanus on the couch)

Satanus: He actually said that? No, he actually said that?

(Cuts to Billy on the couch)

Billy: I’m gonna be. The best. Dad. Ever. No other dad will dad like I dad.

(Cuts to Satanus on the couch)

Satanus: *laughing too much to be human* Please—Please don’t—Make it stop! I can’t!

[ONGOING]

࣪ ִֶָ☾. jegulus socmed au where james wants to get his college papers done. regulus just wants him.

barty tries to help but he doesn't consider the woes of technology and regulus' dry personality.

good thing james might want regulus just as much.

heyy

[part 01 ; part 02 ; part 03 ; part 04 ; part 05 ; part 06 ; part 07 ; part 08 ; part 09 ; part 10 ; part 11 ; part 12 ; part 13 ;

one of those tiktok gotham university reporters approaching bernard on the way to one of his bio classes: thoughts on red robin?

bernard, mildly sleep deprived, and knowing full well what tim’s night life is like: smash [proceeds to walk away like nothing happened]

Day 5 of Billy Batson week, this one is dedicated to all the 12 year old Dad Billy AU’s out there, especially when Kon’s the one being adopted

Also I really want to know what the salary of a justice leaguer would be, is it a 401k? Can it support one person or a family? Or is it just above minimum wage? Do they even get dental?

Do you know in the DC universe how Tawky tawny is either a talking tiger , a talking tiger that stands on two legs ,or just a tiger . My favorite version of him is when he’s Billy’s stuffed animal. Because I think it would makes for some really funny scenes.

imagine that the justice league had a mission were they had to protect some little kids and captain marvel comes over and gives the kids stuff animal tiger and says “ I’m going to need this back, but if anything happens, he’ll protect you” everybody watching is like “look at captain marvel his so sweet”. Then later some villain is trying to attack the kids and the stuffed animal that Captain Marvel give the kids turns into a real life tiger and it starts fighting the villain. Everybody looking and thinking “wtf”.

after the fight is over, Captain Marvel goes over to the Tiger end it talks to him before turning back into a stuffed animal.

Somebody random says “cap wtf was that” and Billy’s like “oh, this” holding up the stuffed animal “ this is Tawky Tawny He’s one of my best friends I’ve known him since I was a kid he basically taught me everything I know”.

Billy being the guardian of the Rock of Eternity which holds many of the most evil creatures in the world like the seven deadly sins is hilarious to me. Probably not canon but in this au every few years he meets up with the other beings who watch over a bunch of dangerous sinners. They use the meetings to share any strategies or mishaps so they can help each other be more efficient but since they’ve all been around for thousands of years minimum, they’ve pretty much optimized their systems so they spend most of the time gossiping and hanging out lol.