Was Just Wondering How Funny It Would Have Been If The Game Mechanics Just Suddenly Stopped Working.

Damn Akinator... didn't have to roast Arisu like that...

An even sadder Kuzuyuuma fic becos why not? ( a bit out of the Borderlands theme but I needed to make it extra sad so just excuse me)

"Kyuuma."

"Hmm?"

"You'll always remember me, right? Even if I go to some faraway place and for a long time... you'll always remember me, right?"

"What are you saying, of course I will!"

"...Good. Just asking."

It was time for their plan to beat the joker card. The card that had been directly responsible for the death of so many innocent people.

They decided not to tell Mira and Shiirabi. It would just be their little secret between them. If they ever did need their help, they would tell them immediately.

"This joker isn't some ordinary guy. To defeat him, as the ancient prophecy had foretold, we'll need a word powerful enough to cut his flesh, and a swordmaster willing enough to wields the sword to cut his flesh."

"Hmm. I get the sword part, but why would the sofar not be willing to cut the joker's flesh?"

Kyuma, again with his baseless questions, said out loud.

"Well, I wouldn't know," Kuzu replied monotonously.

"Anyway, apparently now we have to go to the Requiem Of The Echoing Depths (and yes I copied that from Genshin) and find the sword? I have no idea," Kyuma replied now energetically.

"Well, we already know where this Requiem is, so let's go!"

---------------------

"Uh... this is it? Doesn't look very Echoing Depthsy- wait Kuzu don't go in yet, wait for me!" Kyuma shouted to his glasses guy (yes, his glasses guy)

After a short period of walking, they arrived at a fork.

"It splits two ways,"

"Yes, that's how a fork works,"

"..." Kuzu tried not to show any emotion regarding the insult-compliment Kyuma just threw at him.

"Which way should we go?" Kyuma questioned.

"Um... I think we should go the left way? I might be wrong, and there might be a trap there, though," Kuzu sounded his opinion.

"Oh whatever! If there's a trap, we'll figure out how to escape it together, let's go left if you think so then!"

And so left they went.

And indeed left was right. (Pun intended)

They arrived at a room with a stone pedestal. On the stone pedestal, there was a little device that looked highly technological enough Kyuma could swear it was built by aliens.

They reached forth to take it, careful of any traps, if any.

"Seems like some device for... sword-making? Kuzu, we found the right place!" Kyuma announced as he read off the label, which literally wrote: "Sword-making machine. "

"But how does it work?"

"Let's take it back to the HQ first. There might be traps around here,"

"Oh yeah, let's,"

-----------------------

"... Wait. I think I know how to operate it."

"Wait, you do? How?"

"The joker is a really twisted god. He must have put this here so he could give those who want to kill him a chance to. But there must be some kind of twist behind it..."

"Oh yeah, well said, Kuzu,"

"Uh...ok, concentrate... uh... no this doesn't work" Kuzu's failed attempt at activate the device was greeted by a slight smirk on Kyuma's face.

"Well, whatever, let's go get some snacks," Kyuma, distracted by his hunger, informed the lawyer of his whereabouts, then disappeared into the lunch crowd.

"I'll join you later!" Kuzu shouted at him against the noises of the other citizens' and dealers' conversations.

"...So that's how you work it. A true "hearts game" indeed. Then I'll take it. It's not like I could let anyone else take the glory anyway."

"So... you have decided? Are you sure you want to do this? Is it really worth it just for me?" A dark silhouette arose from and surrounded the device.

"To defeat you, anything is worth it!"

"Ah... I see... a memory for a memory..."

"But don't think you get the easy way out. They are going to remember you until they leave this land. And you...

you... are not going to die. I will keep you alive, as the "true hearts game", after all..."

"...Just one question before I go. ...Why?" Kuzu questioned the shadow.

"You ask me, why? Why, indeed, I do not know either," The Joker replied honestly.

"So, that's why... alright then, do it.

I shall defeat you, Joker of the Borderlands."

"Ahahahaha, yes! Then let the games begin!

Although, I'll need the help of a certain nudist..." The Joker hinted at musingly.

"?!? ... You leave him out of this!" Kuzu replied defensively.

"Don't fret, It's just that I can't take a physical form, so I'll have to possess someone to..."

"Kuzu? What..." Kyuma, seeing that Kuzu hadn't come for the snacks yet, came to find him.

"Ah, perfect timing!" mused the Joker.

"Wait, no, Kuzu don't...Aahhh," The Joker had already taken control of Kyuma's body.

"Just do it. Defeat the joker, and save all players and players to come!"

"Now, I want... that knife over there. The sharpest knife in the shed, eh?" Kyuma- or rather, the joker- reached for the knife on the table he was gesturing at.

"Please don't..." Kyuma pleaded with him.

His hands had gotten hold of the knife and was plunging it into Kuzuryu.

It was his own hands that was killing Kuzuryu.

His own hands.

His murderer.

He caught Kuzu in his hands as he fell over from his wounds.

"Ugh...it...it's ok...I'll probably... with... these... wounds...go in about 30 minutes..." Kuzu reassured the nudist.

"Please, Kuzu, don't..." Kyuma continued to plead with him.

"Please...forget me..."

"Ah, what a sweet romance this is! Shall I end it for you?" Amused the Joker, clearly either not able to read the room or just plainly oblivious to the moment of silence Kyuma obviously needed.

"YOU SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP!!!" Kyuma was mad now.

"...You said you...didn't have a ...physical form, yet gave us a... sword to ....cut your flesh... what are you... planning at?" Kuzu came to a sudden realisation of a contradiction within this cruel god's words.

"What? Oh, that? Oh, I do have a physical form, I just wanted to enjoy the drama of this guy being the one to drive the sword into you, and I must say it was pretty-"

"I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO SHUT UP! TO JUST SHUT UP!"

"Oh and did he mention? For the rather large serving of icing on the cake, once you return to the real world, all memories of him will be word from the surface of the planet! You won't even remember him! AHAAHAHA!" The Joker was starting to sound a lot like Mira now. Granted Mira would never do something like this.

"...I will kill you."

"What?"

"I'll kill you. With the sword and my own two hands."

"Oh right, before I forget, here's the sword! It's made with the memory and life force of this glasses guy here! Aaahhh how interesting!

If you need me, I'll be at the Requiem Of Echoing Depths!"

And with that, the Joker was off.

Kuzu had already lost consciousness from the blood loss, and all Kyuma could do was hug his lifeless body.

"I'm sorry.... I'm really sorry...."

-----------------------

"Ah, so here we are, the nudist with his sword. And I thought you wouldn't want to come anymore after that last encounter, hmm? Anyw-"

Kyuma didn't even let him finish speaking. He straightaway swung his sword at the Joker, barely missing him.

"Oh, so we're really getting serious now, huh? Alright then...Gahhhh!"

Kyuma swung his sword again, this time plunging it into the Joker's stomach.

"Hey at least gimme a warning first, right?"

"This sword... is Kuzuryu's sacrifice. I'm not gonna let that go to waste."

Kyuma lunged forward, and before the Joker could have had any time to react, stabbed the sword into his neck and cut off his head.

"Congratulations. It is game clear. All survivors will be sent back to the real world," The familiar robotic lady voice announced.

"It's game clear, Kuzu, it's game clear," Kyuma cried, hugging the sword dearly.

--------------------

"Oi, Mira! It's your turn to pay today!" Kyuma reminded Mira of what she was supposed to do.

"What? No! I paid the last time, so it's your turn to pay now!" Mira then reminded Kyuma of what he was supposed to do.

"Shiirabi, whose turn is it to pay?" Kyuma and Mira both questioned their trustworthy third party.

"Um... Kyuma's?"

"I KNEW IT pay up now~"

"Ughhhh, fineeeee" Kyuma whined as he got up out of his comfortable seat and got ready to pay the bartender.

"That'll be $93."

"Ok. Give me a moment to find the money.."

Oh, there was already someone paying.

Wait.

There was something oddly familiar about him.

Was it the hoodie or the mask? Kyuma didn't know.

"Um, Hi. You look familiar, have I seen you before somewhere?"

He must have really startled the guy, because the moment he heard his voice, he immediately tensed up.

"Oh... uh... no." The man responded.

"Uh...I don't have enough money, I'm sorry," He turned to inform the cashier.

"Wait, lemme pay for you," Kyuu swooped in to save him from embarassment.

"Huh? Nononono, I can pay for myself..."

"No need, I've decided to pay for you, which means I'm paying for you no matter what you say! By the way, what you said just now really reminded of someone I feel like I know...

Well, you look really familiar, hey I know! How about I take you to my friend Mira? She's a psychiatrist, maybe she'll know why I find you so familiar!" Kyuma suggested.

"Oh, Mira..."

"Hmm? You know her?"

"Oh! Uh... no! It's nothing,"

"Oh right, I haven't even introduced myself yet. My name's Ginji Kyuma. What's yours?"

"... Keiichi Kuzuryu. A pleasure to meet you."

"Haha, well, we should meet up some other day, eh Kuzuryu? Mira's waiting, and if I don't get back in time, she'll slit my throat (literally)!"

"Yeah, that sounds like Mira alright, um, bye!"

Kuzu bid farewell to the enthusiastic little man.

After he left, he took out his phone.

Or, rather, his Borderlands phone.

RE: RESET DATA. CLEAR ALL MEMORY. RESET MEMORY.

...

GAME SAVED.

Whew this is really going out of the borderlands topics but I needed to have some sort of way for them to erase memory of Kuzu's existence so yeah.

Leave a note if this made you cry! I hope it did! And I hope I didn't sound like a pyschopath in the above sentence!

Btw the $93 Kyuu pays for Kuzu is actually symbolic of the Kyuu's 93rd day in the borderlands, which is the day the citizen quartet clear the K♡.

And also this is shitty because it's out of the botderlands theme but hey, at least I tried, right?

Do you write for tatta

Platonic x readers, sure! But I have some real life issues going on now so I can only write when I have the time, so please be patient!

For anyone who's out there reading this, please make a post, any post, on your tumblr blog, so that the blogs you follow know that you aren't another porn bot. Otherwise, dom't blame us if you look sketchy and we block and report you.

PLEASE REBLOG THIS. 🙏 NEWER PEOPLE ON TUMBLR DON'T KNOW ABOUT THE PORN BOT, LET'S ALL HELP TO TEACH THEM

Now hold on just a damn second. Have we ever been confirmed what each of the suits actually mean? Like we know from that old man in the 5♤, but he hsd to have heard that from someone else, and they have to heard that from someone else, and maybe they just guessed based on the how each of the suits match the types of games, but we've never been explicitly told what they mean. Like no big Joker or Game Master or someone who knows how the Borderlands work has ever explicilty explained it to us. So could it be that... we've been wrong about the suits all along? 🤔🤔🤔

Reblog if your tumblr url is the same one you started with.

This is a serious thing. Im curious how many people over the course of year(s) kept the same tumblr handle. A ton of the people I follow have changed their over time.

As far as I know Im one of the few who havent. Few being relative as there are millions of tumblr users. But yeah.

Social experiment.

If you HAVE changed your URL Click Here

A little depressing citizen quartet story as if you aren't sad enough already (also pls excuse my shitty writing)

"Three Sheep, One Wolf"

"The four of us are unexpectedly awesome, eh? I mean, it's not like we participate in games together, but we meet everyday, and so far, no one's died yet!" Ah, Kyuma, ever so optimistic. He couldn't exactly say the same for the other three, though.

One was an old man who often liked using the words "breathing" and "suffering" together in the same sentence, often implying the same meaning.

The other was some lawyer dude with glasses that talked about equality every possible conversation he gets into. (Okay fine, he doesn't, but he liked to add that in because he thought his boyfri- Uh, I mean, good friend had literally nothing interesting to write about).

And Mira was just... Mira.

Granted, she was fun to hang out with, but Kyuma couldn't help but find her a little creepy at times.

But make no mistake. He may have listed his friends as simply boring here, but he got along pretty well with them, and liked them a lot.

"Wow, even after becoming citizens, we still have to participate in games? Why tho?"

Their phones had just received a notification from an "unknown number": Congratulations on attaining citizenship! You are now all citizens of the Borderlands! However, let this be known that you still must participate in games like normal players would, and are not allowed to know the difficult or rules of the games beforehand, otherwise it just becomes boring! Well, have a lovely time, citizens of the Borderlands, it's GAME START! "

Shiirabi and Mira both scoffed a little. Kuzu showed no reaction. Well, how about that one over there? The one in the botanical garden. Looks fancy to me." The nudist pointed in the direction of the game arena.

"...ok" Kuzu responded monotonously. "Oh come on, gimme me more energ-woah, collars, terrible way to go, from ny experience," Kyuma was definitely a bit too optimistic for everyone else's likings. Their phones made the usual dinging sound whenever a game was about to start. "Difficulty, 7♡"

"The... 7♡?" The usually calm and collected Mira looked she might have even started to panic a little. Well, just a little, of course.

"Rules: One person will be the wolf and the three others will be the sheep. When a sleep kicks eye contact with a wolf, they will become the new wolf, and a sheep cannot become the wolf for the next three seconds. After 15 minute, the collars around all the sheep will explode. Hide well, little sheep, and have fun! It's GAME START!"

"A... single survivor game?" Kuzu exclaimed.

"!?!?" The old man in the cloak made a shocked face.

"Dingdingdingding...ding! Our first wolf today is... Ginji Kyuma!" The giant Game TV indicated on who the survivor role had been passed on to, accompanied with its iconic little "yay!".

"Wait wait wait, everyone don't panic, I know how we can all survive this, we have to use the tools they gave us to dismantle our collars," Mira (not as calmly as before, I'd like to add) announced to the gang of a possible no death solution to the horrid and gut-wrenching game they had gotten themselves into.

"Tools? There... aren't any." Kuzu gestured to the empty table that would have been otherwise displayed with plenty of interesting little killing "tools" to help the players tear into each other and spice the game up a little.

Actually, it wasn't completely empty. Two little collar dismantlers- designed specifically by Mira herself to dismantle collars safely without needing to use a screwdriver or gamer of some kind- were sitting on it, arranged in a neat little row.

But the strangest thing is that there were bombs attached to it. And no, they weren't the kind that would blow the entire place up- it looked more like it only had the firepower to blow up the collar dismantle itself.

"So if we use the collar dismantlers, it explodes? So only two people can have their collars dismantled, and with the wolf surviving, so..." The "ever so optimistic" one of the four was starting to turn out not so optimistic after all.

"This... is our retribution. It's our punishment for our sins, the people we killed and the people whose blood was at spilled in this place, it's... a taste of our own medicine"

Oh, Shiirabi really was the complete opposite of Kyuma.

A moment of silence followed as everyone silently mourned for the unnamed one among them destined to die.

"... So only one of us has to die this time, ... let me go. This will probably be the most equal death I can die, for everyone else, after all." Kuzu, voice cracking, was the first to pipe up after the *rather* long moment of silence.

"No, you're not dying. You're not going anywhere. I'll go. I've always wanted to die by a hearts game anyway ♡" Mira, tearing up a little, immediately spoke to take the position of the unnamed hero among them from Kuzu.

"...You two can stop fighting about who's going to die among you. I'll go. I've always seen birth as a curse and existence as a prison anyway, (and yes that was a good place reference) with death being the only salvation. So let me attain my salvation, please, and let me go peacefully." Shiirabi let out a loud sigh and spoke his profound and not really popular opinion on the value of life. He had been cleverly hiding his face from view then, as if to somehow mask the tears streaming down his face.

Kyuma, watching this all, suddenly wished he had a mask and some onions to chop. When the others came to ask him what was happening, he could just say he had been chopping onions.

Not that they would realise with the mask on, anyway.

Yes.

He could just put on the mask and everything would be fine.

They'd still be sitting in their comfortable citizen headquarters, with Kuzu trying to read and Mira constantly annoying him, and Shiirabi just rambling on about his "cultural beliefs", as he would like to call it.

Yes.

Everything was still alright.

It was just a dream.

It was just a dream.

It was all... just...a dream...

But he had to come back to reality eventually.

He couldn't keep the mask on forever.

His friends needed him.

"Alright, everyone, I'll be the one to go, okay? I wanna die with dignity, and dying for you guys..." He couldn't even finish his sentence properly without his throat turning traitor to his decision to hide everything he was feeling.

"... What a twisted game." Mira uttered under her breath. Everyone instinctively took a few steps back. Mira wasn't like someone to show emotions so easily.

She would always hide it with a smile.

A beautiful smile.

But the level of emotion Mira was showing was unlike something amt of the other citizens had seen. She was raging, like dynamite thrown into a roaring flame. Her eyes glared like razor-sharp daggers that threatened to kill anyone who even so much as thought of glancing at her when she was at this critical moment.

This moment of doom. A time to mourn.

It should have been a happy day for them all.

But now it was only going to be a happy day for the one who died.

Because the rest could never live with what they had done now.

"I'll kill you...I'll fucking kill you!!" She suddenly screamed at the top of her lungs.

Then she suddenly stopped in her tracks and just started to bawl her eyes out.

She realised now.

She was the one designated to design many such games like these games.

These "sick, twisted" games.

It really was "a taste of her own medicine"

The other citizens didn't know what to do. They had never seen Mira both so angered and so vulnerable at the same time ever before.

Kuzu had tried to comfort Mira a bit by patting her on the shoulder, but all it did was make her cry even more, which startled Kuzu and he didn't know what to do anymore.

Then he suddenly started to cry too, and then Shiirabi and Kyuma soon followed, and they all just hugged each other together.

Because the other citizens had realised it too.

Not that she was the creator of similar games as this.

But that who the one "destined to die" was didn't matter.

After all, the one "destined to die" physical body would have died, but mentally and spiritually they would have transcended beyond the stars.

But the three survivors would have been plunged into an eternal darkness not even Satan himself could get them out of.

They would have survived physically, but they would have lost all right to enjoy their lives or even just take their next breath.

And all because of three wolves and a sheep.

Phew, that was pretty long, but I got it down! Let me know if you enjoyed it and what you think! Oh, and since I'm still learning on different ways to improve my writing, if you have any comments or suggestions on how to improve it, do lemme know! 😀

btw this was inspired by @miraofhearts2point0 's post about the citizens playing the 7♡ and since I wanted to be sad and I'm also deprived of fanfic just about the citizens being a happy little family so I wrote this! It's terrible, but hey, at least I'm trying, right?

THEEEE FOUND FAMILLYYYYYY

tempted to write a (platonic) Aguni, Heiya and Doudou fic where they spend valentines day (night) painting and eating candy. idk.

A Little Kuzuyuuma Drabble I Guess

Warnings: Shitty writing

"Kuzu! Wanna go out for breakfast or something?" Kyuu suggested.

Kuzu, as usual, was hard at work on his usual...work, and Kyuu wanted him to just relax a little.

Granted relaxing as much as he did wouldn't exactly be ideal.

"Uh...it's already lunch but ok," The glasses man agreed.

And so to lunch they went.

Kyuu had an ideal restaurant in mind, the random pizza place across their apartment served fantastic pizza and pasta.

But by the time they got there, an extremely long queue had already formed. This kind of queue would require at least a few hours of waiting.

No matter, this place's pizza was to die for, a few hours meant nothing.

"Oh well, I guess we'll have to wait a while now," Kyuu pointed out the obvious.

Kuzu rolled his eyes at another one of Kyuu's lame jokes while supressing a smile.

Luckily for them, many customers soon grew impatient and left the queue, leaving our pair seated comfortably in the restaurant in no time.

"Uh... I'd like an extra-cheesy cheese lava pizza, and he'll have the carborana pasta," Kyuu ordered as he decided Kuzu's meal without informing him.

"Uh... ok I guess," Kuzu was not the kind to protest violently against trivial details like his lunch. He just went along with whatever Kyuu suggested.

"Your food is here!" This restaurant was insanely quick in serving its dishes, they hadn't even realised they'd finished ordering already.

"Yay! Let's eat!" Kyuu exclaimed wildly, then began to slurp and chew his cheesy pizza viciously and rather loudly.

Kuzu, being the refined gentleman he was, ate his pasta with the posture of an educated being. Slowly and quietly.

Kuzu was not embarrased of Kyuu though, despite the many weird looks from different customers.

After all, why should he?

After all, he was proud of the fact that he was Kyuu's, and that Kyuu's was his.

Idk honestly apologies for how terrible this is, and I'm sorry if I've disapponted you idk