I Think My Friends And I Are Flirting Platonically But GOD Msybe Not

if you see this post i am cleansing you of all the “send this to ten ppl or you’ll have bad luck” and “reblog or you’re a terrible person” type things

you are safe now <3

here is a good luck : 🍀

jegulus fic where james is a youtuber/streamer who does all sorts of pretty crazy pranks and people ADORE him because he's totally shameless.

one day he gets dared to crash a wedding and oppose it, pretending to be in love with either the groom or the bride.

and even though his editor (and bestest friend) remus told him that that's fucking insane, james still chose to do it bc he's a menace. but he does promise to cut it all off if things get messy.

james gets everything ready and, after stalking some of his old school classmates, he finds that one of them is attending a wedding (it's mulciber, who james remembers to despise back then, so it's a win-win situation), which means his plan is all set.

by fate, and fate only, this wedding is regulus' and some girl's his parents chose for him (and mulciber was invited bc his family is very close to the black's)

and obviously, this is a clear forced marriage, regulus would rather kill himself than marry a girl, he's as gay as they come.

[for sake of the plot, sirius and james don't know each other at all, didn't go to school together either, and sirius didn't run away and is also livid with his parents for marrying reg off, but there wasn't anything he could do]

so! prank day, james is live the moment he, very dramatically, stands up and proclaims his love for this.... regulus guy, and how he knows he promised to not come but he just couldn't handle the thought of the love of his life being married to someone else (his followers thought he was going to claim to love the bride, but james found the groom way too cute and he just couldn't hold himself back, he's just a guy)

the 30 seconds of pure silence and shock that follow are almost enough to make james break character and start laughing like crazy.

regulus, who's flabbergasted by the way, knows immediately that it's a prank. however, this might as well be a sign of the gods, because, what are the chances that this (very handsome) random man, chose HIS wedding out of all, and targeted HIM to be the one he "loves"? way to many coincidences.

also, did he mention the dude is unbelievably fit?

he makes a choice right there.

using all his acting abilities, he makes a whole scene tearing up and running to him. it's so well done, james for a second believes they are actual lovers.

hell breaks at that moment, walburga goes absolutely nuts along with orion and their side of the family. the bride's family start a fight, and between the commotion regulus sees his brother laughing maniacally after their mother yells at regulus to stop playing games or he will get disowned.

james, who thinks that this is now along the lines of things getting messy, is about to announce it's all a prank, when regulus sees right through him, panics, and just whispers "im going to kiss you now, sorry" before snogging the life out of him.

remus, who's the camera guy, cuts the live right there.

james, oh james, he doesn't quite hear the screech walburga lets out because this backfired so bad, but jesus chirst can this regulus kiss. this is love at first sight. love at first prank, if you may.

regulus knowing stuff is about to get bad, just grabs james' hand and runs for it. james just follows, he's dizzy. remus also follows because he's NOT getting involved in all that, he's actually quitting james.

sirius follows too, if his little brother is finally disowned, there's no reason to stay, thank you very much.

anyways, this whole idea was just because i want james followers to see his channel thumbnails going:

CRASHING A RANDOM WEDDING 💍 PRANK #56

to

how i met the love of my life ; Q&A

and

REG AND I ARE GETTING MARRIED (im sealing all entries so no-one can crash it) — VLOG

bye

Hello tiny gay ppl in my phone I need some help

So for context I'm friends with this girl and like we hang out as part of a larger group and I can't tell if she's flirting w me or not (thanks autism) but she is always very smiley and the other day she asked me to lick her chocolate before she ate it - which I did - but she also isn't very like touchy even tho she said that was her love language before and I just don't know

Help appreciated <3

my breasts look sublime! #beyourownpervyoldman

Just hit my head on the wall (accidentally) and then glared at the wall like it was its fault

I apologised after dw

some of u should have an OnlyClowns account

Soap is a pervert this. No, Soap is a hopeless romantic that. Well what if he’s both. Utterly and completely in love with his woman, so in love that he can’t help BUT be perverted when it comes to her. Yes he comes home with flowers, but while you’re bending over to smell them he’s humping your ass, getting off to you absolutely loving the flowers. He takes you to your favorite restaurant on your anniversary, the atmosphere all romantic and intimate. He’s staring at you like you placed the very stars in the sky, his voice a little shaky as he rattles on about how beautiful you are and how lucky he is to have you. Your eyes are dewy from his little speech and he can’t help but chub up a bit because he loves how you look when you cry. He drops to his knees as he’s done plenty of times before, taking your hands as he looks at you. There’s a ring in his pocket and a pair of your worn panties in the other.

A/N: abrupt ending I literally just had to get this out my head 😭

do you want me to put that fictional man in a situation for you miss