Um... Who Is This?

anxiety - n.rk

pairing: stranger!nishimura riki x fem!reader

synopsis: you meet him on a quiet night — a stranger with sharp eyes and a colder edge, nothing like anyone in your sleepy suburb. he won’t talk, barely looks at you, but something about him lingers. maybe you’re just curious. or maybe you’ve seen him before.

featuring: ni-ki & jake of enhypen

genre: childhood friends to lovers, a sprinkle of angst, smut, skinship, kissing, etc.

warnings: smut (18+), difficult relationships with parents, love at first sight lowk, vulnerability, themes of implied watching (not rlly stalking) but it isn't graphic, riki smokes cigs, uhhh i think that's it?? lowercase intended heh

playlist: anxiety by doechii, clarity by zedd & sacrifice by enhypen

(smut warnings under cut)

wc: 9.120k

a/n: this is way longer than i expected but it came to me in a dream... enjoy! also i'm gonna start a perm taglist! comment on any of my fics or send an ask to be added! <3

smut content: riki's PACKING, they cum in their pants lol, dry humping, deepthroating kinda, backshots LMAO, missionary, dom!riki x sub!reader, degradation & praise kinks, creampie, like SO MUCH cum... n e ways! fluffy aftercare, unprotected sex (wrap b4 you tap), tit fucking, oral (m. receiving), choking, everything is consensual, riki and reader are both so down bad for each other... lmk if i missed anything :3

(not proofread)

-ˏˋ⋆ 7 months ago ⋆ˊˎ-

it was raining the day you first felt it — that creeping sensation at the back of your neck, like invisible fingers brushing against your skin.

not a storm, not anything dramatic. just that kind of soft, cold drizzle that seeped into your clothes and made the world feel like it was holding its breath. gray sky melted into gray pavement, the horizon smeared like a half-finished painting. you were standing under the chipped awning of the old bakery on the corner, the scent of yeast and sugar mixing with the rain, waiting for your usual thursday pastry that was always slightly overbaked but comfortingly warm.

you remember scrolling through your phone, aimlessly, as your friend, jake, rambled beside you about something he saw on tv. you weren't listening. you were too aware of the feeling — that hum beneath your skin. subtle but unshakable.

“there’s someone watching me,” you’d said earlier that morning, trying to brush it off with a laugh as you stirred milk into your coffee. “it’s my anxiety.” jake didn’t look up from his phone. “or maybe you’re watching yourself spiral.”

you’d rolled your eyes. maybe he was right. midterms were looming, you hadn’t slept in days, and your brain felt like it was being slowly pulled apart by rubber bands. but still. the feeling didn’t go away.

it got worse.

you’d been fidgeting, switching the weight on your feet, chewing the inside of your cheek. and then, like something calling your name without a sound, your eyes had drifted across the street.

that’s when you saw him.

a boy. or maybe a man — it was hard to tell, the rain blurred everything. tall, impossibly still, wearing a black hoodie that clung to his shoulders. he wasn’t under any kind of shelter. he stood alone, soaked to the bone, his face half-hidden by the hood, his gaze fixed. not on the road. not on the buildings. but on you.

you stared. you didn’t recognize him. not really. and yet something deep in your chest stirred like a memory. like a name you almost remembered. like a dream you’d had once and forgotten by morning.

you glanced down for a second — a message lighting up your screen.

when you looked up, he was gone.

no footsteps. no splash. just… gone.

you never told jake. what would you say? you didn’t even know what you’d seen. maybe nothing at all.

maybe your anxiety really was watching you. maybe it had grown arms and legs and a face hidden under a rain-soaked hood. maybe it had always been there, just waiting for the right day to show itself.

either way, it started then.

and it never really stopped.

-ˏˋ⋆ present day ⋆ˊˎ-

the hallway is too quiet for a friday night.

you shuffle down the corridor with a tied-up trash bag swinging limply at your side, socks stuffed in your duck slippers, slapping against the cool tile floor. the overhead light flickers once, buzzing faintly. classic.

you reach the stairwell, already bracing yourself for the sharp chill of the outside air, when you stop short.

he’s there.

leaning against the railing of the third-floor landing, hoodie pulled up over his head, cigarette dangling between his fingers — even though this is strictly a no-smoking building. he doesn’t flinch when you turn the corner. just keeps staring out at the dim skyline, face barely visible under the shadow of his hood.

you slow down, blinking.

he’s not familiar — not really. you pride yourself on knowing every face in this sleepy apartment complex, whether through polite nods in the mailroom or awkward elevator silences. but him? nothing. no name. no room number. just angles and silence.

and yet… something about him rings in your head like a half-forgotten dream.

his profile is soft, almost too pretty to be real. sharp jaw, dark lashes, bangs dipping into his eyes. he looks like he doesn’t belong here — like someone plucked him out of a bigger story and dropped him into yours by mistake.

"hey," you offer, voice casual, just above a whisper. "you new here?"

he doesn’t look at you. doesn’t answer.

awkward.

you shift the trash bag in your hands, trying again. “i live on the second floor. don’t think i’ve seen you around before.”

still nothing. just a small exhale of smoke that curls into the cold night air.

rude, you think. but not in a mean way. more like… distant. careful.

you lean against the opposite railing, letting the silence stretch for a few seconds.

"you look familiar," you say, eyes narrowing. "have we met before?"

this time, his gaze flickers. not quite to you — just past you. a twitch of recognition, maybe. or annoyance.

you can't tell.

but your brain is racing. you know him. you must. maybe in passing. maybe in a memory. maybe you’ve just seen him out here before, on the edge of your vision, existing quietly in the corners of your routine. maybe your subconscious noticed him long before you did.

he stubs out the cigarette and walks past you without a word.

you don’t move. you just watch him disappear down the hall, hoodie covered by a black jacket, hands stuffed in his pockets.

"okay then," you murmur to yourself, staring after him. and you can’t help it — the way your eyes linger on the spot he stood, heart ticking a little faster.

there’s something about him.

you just don’t know what. yet.

───

it's raining the next time you see him.

you’re standing under the overhang by the front entrance, fumbling with your umbrella, when the door swings open behind you. you glance back — and it’s him. again.

hoodie. same brown timberlands. same unreadable expression.

you swear he pauses when he sees you, just a fraction of a second. but maybe that’s in your head.

"you smoke a lot for someone living in a no-smoking building," you say without thinking, half a joke.

he doesn’t laugh. but his lips twitch, barely, like maybe he almost did.

he steps out into the rain without an umbrella.

"hey!" you call, surprised. "you're seriously just gonna walk in that?"

he doesn't stop. doesn't answer. but this time, he does glance back at you over his shoulder. eyes dark. thoughtful. like he’s trying to decide something.

“i’ve seen you before,” you say — louder, more certain now. “i just don’t remember where.”

his mouth parts, like he might say something. but then he turns and keeps walking, rain soaking into the fabric of his hoodie, blending him into the gray of the street.

and you're left standing there, umbrella unopened, heart kicking strangely against your ribs.

───

it’s quiet in the laundry room — too quiet. the kind of quiet that settles in your chest and presses down, like you’re underwater. the overhead light flickers occasionally, buzzing in protest, but no one’s bothered to fix it. you wouldn’t usually be here this late, but your sheets were stained and the smell was driving you insane. so here you are, half-past midnight, leaning against a rickety folding table, waiting.

your phone barely gets signal this far in the basement, and the wi-fi’s always spotty. it’s just you, the low groan of the washer, and your own thoughts trying to make conversation.

until the door creaks open.

you don’t jump, but your spine straightens on instinct. you don’t have to look up to know it’s him — the presence is immediate, unmistakable. that stillness in the air that follows him like a shadow. you finally glance up, and there he is. same black hoodie. same too-quiet footsteps. same face that looks like it doesn’t belong here. like it was carved into something older than this tiny suburban building.

he doesn’t say a word. just drops a bag on the floor and begins sorting laundry like it’s the most normal thing in the world. like you haven’t already seen him twice this week, always at night, always alone, always watching without watching.

“seriously?” you say, trying to keep your voice light. “do you just hang out in weird corners of this complex to freak people out?”

nothing.

he lifts a pair of dark jeans, shakes them out. you watch his fingers. they're pale. long. too clean for someone who lives in this building. you’ve lived here your whole life and never seen him before last week — and yet...

he feels familiar.

“okay,” you continue, stepping off the table now. the room feels colder suddenly. “do you live here? or are you like... a freak with laundry privileges?”

still nothing. you laugh under your breath, but it sounds too loud in the silence. your heartbeat starts to climb your throat.

then he says it. quiet. low.

“you used to wait outside the bakery every thursday. same dark purple coat. hair in a slick bun. you never looked both ways when you crossed the street.”

the words stop you cold.

“what?” you ask, your voice barely audible.

he still doesn’t look at you. he presses a button on the washer. it whirs to life.

“i remember,” he says simply.

and then he walks out.

no explanation. no glance back. just leaves you standing there, spine prickling, air thick with something you can’t name.

you don’t move for a long time. the washer keeps spinning. and somewhere in the back of your mind, a door creaks open — something old, something buried. you know that voice. you know it.

but from where?

and why now?

───

you see him again the next week.

it’s late. everything always is these days. late nights, late thoughts, late feelings that come crawling out of places you’ve spent years trying to bury.

he’s there again by the mailboxes, half-shrouded in the dim glow of the overhead light. same hoodie, same stillness. like he’s always belonged to the dark. like the world moves around him, but never through him.

you don’t say anything this time. just glance at him, let your eyes linger a little too long. the silence stretches like fog between you, thick and almost heavy.

when you get back to your apartment, you sit on the floor of your room, knees to your chest, staring at nothing. trying to remember.

because it’s not just déjà vu. it’s more insistent than that. it’s something sharper. something that presses at the edges of your mind like a dull knife.

you know him.

or—at least, you’ve seen him before. not in this life maybe, but in another version of it. in a hallway, maybe. in a photograph. in a moment you never thought would matter until it does.

you try to pull it apart, memory by memory. but your brain is tired and tangled, the way it always is when you think too hard about the past. especially your own.

your mom used to say you were dramatic. that you let small things become monsters under the bed. “don’t be so sensitive,” she’d snap, when you cried over things she didn’t understand. “you make everything so hard for yourself.”

your dad never said much at all.

they were loud in the wrong ways. silent in the ones that mattered. and you learned early how to turn your feelings into puzzles with missing pieces — complex enough to keep you distracted, but unsolvable enough to stop you from ever really facing them.

and yet, riki… there’s something about him that pulls at those missing pieces. like maybe he was one of them. like maybe he slipped into your life through a crack in the wall and waited, patiently, for you to notice.

was he from your old school? a kid from your neighborhood? someone you passed in a crowd once and never forgot, even if you didn’t realize it?

you hate not knowing. hate how it makes you feel like a child again — helpless and unsettled. desperate for answers no one’s willing to give.

maybe that’s what this really is. not fear. not obsession. just the ache of a memory that refuses to resurface.

he’s a question mark in human form. and you’ve never been good with uncertainty.

you don’t see him again for days.

which should be a relief. it should give you space to think, to forget. but it doesn’t. it just makes everything louder. the silence, the questions, the feeling in your gut that something is watching you — or waiting.

your sleep turns thin and restless. shadows stretch too long across your walls. you start leaving your bedroom light on. just in case.

one night, you wake up at 3:12 a.m., heart racing for no reason at all. it takes a second to realize what pulled you out of sleep — a sound. something light. deliberate.

a knock?

you hold your breath. wait. nothing.

you get up anyway.

there’s no one at the door. of course not. but something catches your eye as you start to turn back — something lying just at the edge of your doormat. small. folded. a piece of paper.

you hesitate, then pick it up. it’s blank on the outside. no name. no writing. nothing.

you open it slowly.

inside, in rushed, almost messy handwriting, are six words:

“do you really not remember me?”

your throat goes tight. your first instinct is to look around, scan the hallway, check the peephole twice. there’s no one.

no sound.

just that question burning in your hands.

do you really not remember me?

your fingers shake a little as you fold it back up. your brain is moving too fast and not fast enough at the same time. and that feeling — the one that’s been gnawing at you for days — it blooms in your chest like a scream that never makes it out.

because now it’s real. now you know you aren’t imagining it. the familiarity, the tension, the way your spine goes rigid every time you see him —

he knows you.

he’s known you.

and maybe you did know him once, too. maybe you still do, buried under everything you’ve forgotten on purpose.

you think about the look in his eyes that first night. the way he never said a word. the stillness of him.

you think of the hallway. the sound that woke you. the note.

you think of how you told your friend the other day, half-laughing, half-serious: “there’s someone watching me, it’s my anxiety.”

but what if it’s more than that?

what if it’s not just in your head?

what if it’s him? 

───

it hits you in the middle of folding laundry.

something about the way your fingers move. something about the light slanting in through the kitchen window. warm, but not comforting. and all at once, you’re not in your apartment anymore.

you’re in a house. someone else’s. maybe your own. there’s music playing — muffled through a closed door. a cheap stereo with tinny speakers. old j-pop, the kind that loops endlessly on cassettes. the wallpaper is peeling in one corner.

and then—

a voice. soft. younger. yours.

"why do you always hide when they come home?"

someone's sitting in the hallway. knees pulled to their chest. head down. shadows in the space between them like they’re both in different dimensions.

and then he looks up.

not the man in the stairwell. not riki, not yet. just a boy. sharp eyes, hollow cheeks, hair too long in front. there’s a cut on his lip. fading purple under his eye.

“because it’s safer,” he says.

the air warps around that line, like heat off asphalt. she wants to reach for him, wants to say something back, but the memory curls tighter around her, swallowing the end of it before she can hold on.

then it’s gone.

just like that.

you blink down at the pile of laundry in your lap, hands gone still.

your chest feels tight. throat aching, like you swallowed something heavy. the apartment feels colder than it should. that voice — his voice — still rings somewhere in your bones.

because you’ve heard it before. not recently. years ago.

and suddenly you’re thinking about your father’s anger. how he used to break things before he yelled. how sometimes he didn’t yell at all. how the silence always scared you more. how you stopped inviting friends over after age ten. how there was one boy you let in. once.

his name—

you press the heel of your palm to her forehead, hard, like you can shake it loose.

it won’t come. not yet.

but the shape of it is there, curling at the edges of a memory like smoke. and the boy with the bruised mouth and quiet eyes — he's not a stranger.

not even close.

later that night, you can't sleep.

there's a weight on your chest that won’t lift no matter how you shift under the sheets. it’s not insomnia — it’s memory. something clawing at the back of your skull, begging to be seen.

so you get up.

the air in the apartment is too still. even the hum of the fridge feels distant. you don't bother with the lights. just moving barefoot and slow, like any noise might scare the truth away.

the closet in the hallway creaks when you open it. you kneel. pushing past shoeboxes, tangled cords, the mess of forgotten things. until your hand hits the one you’re looking for.

a red box. scuffed corners. cheap velvet peeled at the edges. inside: scraps of a childhood. yours.

old keychains, broken friendship bracelets, polaroids faded to brown. concert tickets. a snow globe from sapporo. and then—

a photograph.

creased down the center. color bleeding with age. a summer day, maybe. you’re younger. seven or eight. awkward teeth, sunburnt nose, some awful haircut her mother swore looked cute. and beside you —

a boy.

not smiling. just… there. close, but not touching. eyes dark and watchful even then.

and it’s him.

riki.

only it wasn’t his name back then, was it? he went by ni-ki.

your breath catches. you sit back on your heels, heart thudding in your ears.

how could you forget? they lived on the same street. just four houses down. his mom used to walk him to school until she didn’t anymore. and then he stopped coming altogether.

after that, he vanished. until now.

until the stairwell. until the way he didn’t speak but looked at her like he knew everything.

you swallow the sick twist in your stomach. the sudden, sharp cold shivering down your spine.

why was he back?

and why you?

you leave the photo on the kitchen island.

maybe it’s careless, maybe even stupid, but you tell yourself it’ll make more sense in the morning. you’ll wake up, look at it with clearer eyes, and it won’t feel like your chest is caving in. besides, you live alone. and it’s just a photo.

just a photo.

you drag yourself to the couch, the blanket scratchy against your legs, exhaustion curling into your limbs like smoke. you fall asleep fast — but it’s the wrong kind of sleep. thick, dreamless, heavy with something you can’t name. a noise pulls at you. a door. or a voice. or your own heart cracking open.

you wake up just as the first light creeps through the windows. your mouth is dry. your tongue tastes like copper.

something is off.

you walk into the kitchen, still half in a fog—and stop.

the photo is gone.

you freeze, staring at the empty spot where it had been, your thoughts moving too fast and too slow all at once. the red box is still there. untouched. the lid sitting open like a mouth waiting to swallow more. you check the floor. under the fridge. between papers. nothing.

no one could’ve taken it.

the door was locked. the windows haven’t budged. you were here. you were alone.

a chill slides down your spine, sharp and crawling. you think of him again. the way he looked at you in the stairwell. not confused. not curious.

just watching.

like he already knew what you would find.

your breath catches. you don’t even realize you’ve backed up until your shoulder hits the wall.

you don’t understand what’s happening, but something is— and it’s closing in.

the silence hums in your ears. the wind slips against the glass like breath. and then you see it.

something on the kitchen table.

not the photo. but something folded.

small. white. placed exactly where the photo had been.

your name is written on the front.

in handwriting you almost recognize.

you stare at the folded paper like it might burn through the table. your name, in soft, slanted letters—almost familiar, like a half-remembered dream. the kind you wake up from with your chest tight and eyes wet, but can’t explain to anyone without sounding insane.

your fingers hesitate.

you don’t want to touch it. you want to burn it. you want to leave the apartment and never come back.

but your hand moves anyway, like it isn’t yours. like you’re being pulled by something older than memory.

the paper is heavier than it looks. the kind of paper someone saves. the kind that lives in boxes under beds, waiting to be found.

you unfold it slowly. deliberately.

the first line makes your stomach drop:

“you used to laugh with your whole face.”

your throat tightens. your vision blurs at the edges. you keep reading.

“i remember when you were afraid of thunderstorms. you’d hide under the table with that stuffed bear. the one with the missing eye.”

you sink into the nearest chair. it creaks beneath you. your heartbeat pounds in your ears like thunder.

how does he know that?

no one remembers that.

not even your mother—too busy fighting shadows of men who never stayed long enough to learn your name.

you blink hard, trying to push away the sting in your eyes. your hand shakes as you reach the last line:

“it’s okay if you don’t remember me. i remember you.”

the note isn’t signed.

but you already know who it’s from.

and you’re not sure if that makes it better… or so much worse.

you find yourself standing at the corner of the street, unsure of where to go or how to breathe. the note is heavy in your hand, the words on it are still too real. still too impossible to wrap your mind around.

but you can’t ignore it anymore. you’ve been running from something, running from the truth, but it’s all catching up with you. and it starts with one thing—one person—who might just hold the answers.

you text jake. i need to talk to you.

he replies almost immediately: come over. i’ll make coffee.

you don’t hesitate. your body moves before your brain can catch up.

jake’s apartment smells like coffee, like books, and like something homey you can’t quite place. you’ve always liked it here—quiet, safe, with jake’s easy smile and the way he always listens like he doesn’t have a million things on his plate.

but today, when he opens the door, his smile falters. his eyes linger on the note in your hand before he invites you in.

“what’s going on?” he asks, his voice soft. “you look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“worse,” you murmur, sitting down at the kitchen table. “riki. the guy from my apartment building. the one i’ve been thinking about.”

jake’s face changes. his usual calm demeanor cracks for a split second, but it’s enough. enough to make you sit up straighter, enough to make your heart skip a beat.

“what do you mean, the guy you’ve been thinking about?” he asks carefully. “y/n, you’ve been telling me you’ve never met him before. he’s just some weird guy who shows up at random times. are you sure you’re okay?”

you hesitate. the note is still in your hand. you want to show it to him, but something holds you back. you can’t explain this to him without sounding insane.

“he knows things, jake. about me. about my childhood. stuff no one would know.” you pause, swallowing hard. “it’s like he’s been... watching me.”

the silence in the room thickens. jake stands still, his hands gripping the edge of the table. you can feel his mind working through it, piecing things together. finally, he exhales sharply.

“you know who he is, don’t you?” jake’s voice cracks just a little, and you hate that you can hear it.

“he’s riki,” you whisper. “i know it.”

jake looks like he’s just seen a ghost too. but it’s worse than that. it’s betrayal, old wounds you never knew were still there.

“how do you know him?” you ask, your voice barely above a whisper.

jake runs a hand through his hair, his face tight with something you can’t read. "riki... he was my best friend back home. we were inseparable when we were kids, after he randomly showed up one day. before everything in his home town happened. before he disappeared from there."

you lean forward, your heart racing. "why did he disappear?"

jake looks away, his eyes shadowed with memories. "riki got tangled up in some bad stuff, y/n. things that don’t go away, things that ruin people. he got in with the wrong crowd—gangs, debts, all kinds of shit. he disappeared from there too and... no one ever really knew what happened. but the rumors started. they said he ran. he left everything behind."

your throat tightens. “but... he didn’t.”

jake’s gaze is heavy, dark. “no. he didn’t. he’s been trying to stay hidden ever since. but some ghosts don’t stay buried, y/n.”

your chest tightens. you’ve been living in the shadow of something you can’t even remember fully. and now it’s back.

───

later that night, you find yourself standing in front of riki’s door, your heart hammering in your chest. you knock once, twice, and wait.

the door opens slowly, and riki stands there, eyes wide, almost guilty. he looks different in the light, darker somehow, worn and tired. but the same fire is still there. it’s still riki.

“you know, don’t you?” he says, his voice tight, like he’s holding something back.

you nod, your voice barely above a whisper. “you disappeared. you ran. kept running. and i don’t understand why.”

riki’s eyes flicker with something—pain, maybe. “it’s not that simple. there’s things you don’t know, things i can’t tell you.”

you step closer, ignoring the hesitation in your chest. “i need to know, riki. everything. i need you to tell me.”

his jaw clenches. but then he opens the door wider, his shoulders slumping as he gestures for you to come inside.

you step into his dimly lit apartment, your heart racing. the room feels charged with something unspoken, like the air is holding its breath.

“i didn’t want you to get involved in all of this,” riki says, his voice raw. “but now that you know, i can’t just leave you hanging.”

you take a step forward, your hand trembling as you reach for him, the tension between you unbearable. “you’re not alone in this anymore, riki. i’m here.”

he looks at you, eyes haunted, like he’s trying to decide if he can trust you. then, without warning, his lips crash against yours.

you freeze for a second, the intensity of it taking you by surprise. but then your body reacts, pulling him closer, kissing him back with everything you’ve been holding in. it’s messy, desperate, like neither of you knows what’s happening but can’t stop it.

his hands are everywhere—on your waist, your back, your neck—like he’s trying to memorize you, like he’s afraid you’ll disappear if he lets go.

your heart is racing, your body pressed against his, and for a moment, everything feels like it’s on fire.

riki pulls back, his breathing shallow, his forehead resting against yours. the tension between you two is still there, but it's different now — softer, like a thread connecting you in a way neither of you can fully explain.

"y/n," he says, his voice low but intense, trembling slightly. "there are things i never wanted to tell you, things i couldn't bear to say. i thought it would be easier to push you away, to make you hate me before you found out... but i can't do it anymore. i can't keep lying to myself."

you step back a little, your chest tightening as you watch him. his eyes are full of so many emotions—regret, pain, love—but it’s the last one that makes your heart ache with something you didn’t expect.

"i’ve been in this dark place for so long, y/n. i never thought i could get out of it. i pushed everyone away, especially you, because i knew if i let you in, you’d see the mess i am... but you’re the only one who’s ever mattered. i’ve always known it, even when i was too afraid to admit it. i love you."

his words hang in the air, raw and vulnerable. and you feel something inside of you break wide open—something you’ve been trying so hard to protect, trying to hide.

“i’ve always loved you,” riki continues, his voice softer now, almost like he’s confessing a secret that’s been buried for too long. “even when i tried to run from it, even when i tried to push you away... you were always the one. always.”

you can barely find your voice, overwhelmed by the tenderness in his words. "riki, i—"

but he shakes his head, cutting you off gently. "no, listen. i know i’ve hurt you. i know i’ve been distant, but everything i did... i did it because i was scared. scared of losing you. scared of what you’d think of me if you knew everything. but i can’t hide anymore. not from you. i’ve never stopped loving you. not even for a second.”

tears sting the back of your eyes, but you blink them away, letting his confession settle inside you. your heart feels too full, too full of emotions you don’t know how to contain. you take a deep breath, your voice trembling when you finally speak.

“i’m not going anywhere, riki,” you whisper, the words catching in your throat. “i never was. i don’t care about the past... i don’t care about what happened before. i care about you. i’ve always cared about you.”

for a moment, neither of you moves. the world feels so quiet, like everything has stopped, and it’s just the two of you in this space—this moment where everything you’ve both been hiding finally comes to light.

riki steps closer, his hands gently cupping your face, his thumbs brushing over your skin. his eyes are soft now, almost like he’s memorizing every detail of you, like he never wants to forget this moment.

“can i kiss you again?” he asks, his voice so soft, so unsure. it’s like he’s asking for permission, like he’s afraid of making the wrong move.

you nod, your breath catching in your throat. “please,” you whisper.

and then, his lips are on yours, gentle but urgent, like everything he’s held inside of him is pouring into this kiss. his hands slide to your back, pulling you closer, and you melt into him. you kiss him back with everything you’ve been holding onto, everything you’ve been feeling but never knew how to say.

when you pull back, both of you breathless, riki presses his forehead to yours, his hands resting gently on your hips. his eyes are full of that same tenderness, that same love that’s been there all along.

“i love you, y/n,” he whispers again, this time with more certainty, more peace. “and i always will. no matter what.”

and in that moment, you know, without a doubt, that everything—every question, every fear, every hesitation—has been worth it. because now, in this space, with him, everything feels right.

“i love you too, riki,” you say softly, the words more sure now. “i always will.”

and the kiss that follows is more than just passion—it’s a promise. 

he breaks the kiss and leads you to his bedroom, sitting on the edge of his bed. he pulls you onto his lap and crashes his lips against yours once again. 

but this kiss, it’s different than the others. 

it’s hot. fiery. desperate. 

his tongue bullies its way into your mouth, fighting for dominance which you happily give him. as you continue making out, he becomes increasingly handsy. they fly from your jaw, to your shoulder blades, sliding down to rest on your ass. he grips your clothed flesh with desire.

and that's when you feel it—the unmistakable hardness settled between his legs. pressed against your burning hot core. 

you gasped into his lips and he swallowed it up eagerly. 

he rolled your hips down onto his crotch, seeking friction to ease his hard on. groaning into the kiss, he broke it, tilting his head back.

you carefully observed how his adam’s apple bobbed each time he swallowed, your self control fading into nothing. reaching out to grab his neck, you lightly apply pressure as you leave sloppy, wet kisses all over his jaw. your eyes drop to his collarbones, noticing his hoodie getting in the way.

you shift in his lap, knees sinking further into his bed as your hands find his shoulders for balance. riki looks up at you, eyes half-lidded, lips parted slightly like he’s caught between breath and want. his hoodie is bunched up from where your fingers had tugged at the hem earlier, and when you reach for it again, he doesn’t stop you.

you pull it over his head slowly, your fingers grazing warm skin as the fabric slides up and off. beneath it, he’s wearing a black tank top that clings to him in all the right places—soft cotton stretched over lean muscle, tracing the shape of his chest and the dip of his waist.

his collarbones catch the low light of the room, sharp and defined, leading down to the elegant curve of his neck. you can see the slight rise and fall of it as he swallows, your gaze drifting lower to the sculpted line of his biceps, muscles flexing subtly under your weight, like he’s holding back.

he looks devastating like this—relaxed and bare in a way that feels forbidden, like you’re seeing something no one else is allowed to.

"you’re staring," he says quietly, a flicker of amusement in his voice, but there's a softness to it too, like he doesn’t mind being seen this way. like he wants you to look.

you smile, brushing your fingers across his shoulder, down his arm, feeling the strength beneath the surface. "can you blame me?"

he laughs under his breath, hands settling at your hips, warm and steady. "not really."

you lean in closer, pressing a kiss to the side of his neck, right where it meets his collarbone. he shivers under your touch, and you feel it in your core—how easy it is to fall into him, how right it feels to be here like this.

you push him further on his bed, his back hitting the soft comforter, hands never leaving your hips. 

he captures your lips once again in a kiss that's delicate, like he’s trying to process everything but he can’t. are you really here with him right now? his childhood best friend who he forced himself to cut contact with—but then again, did he ever really cut contact with you? he had to make sure you were okay one way or another, so he watched from the shadows. even if it meant sacrificing his greatest love. you. 

as if you could sense the gears overheating in his brain, you pull away from him and stare into his familiar brown eyes. he pouts and you see a glimpse of ni-ki. the scared, eight year old who you’d give up anything to protect. 

he cradles your face like you’re made of glass and whispers, “are you sure you want this, angel? because once i start… i don’t think i’ll be able to stop.” 

you nod your head, but that doesn’t seem to be enough for him, “words, baby. i need words, hmm?” you bite back a flustered smile, “yeah ni-ki, i want this. you.” 

he grins hearing his childhood name fall out of your soft, sweet lips and picks you up off his lap so he can rest with his back against the headboard. 

settling back on his thighs, and becoming increasingly impatient, you roll your hips against his, surprising him.

he lets out a breathy moan, urging you to continue. you want to hear each of his pretty sounds.

pressing your clothed clit into the tip of his dick, he closes his eyes, biting his lip. you feel him pulsing beneath you, the thin layer of his sweats not doing much to hide his arousal. 

neither of you have ever been this turned on just by kissing, heavy petting, and grinding. but neither of you dare to stop. it feels too good, like a craving you’ve subconsciously had. 

riki pauses the movement of your hips, being the first one to break this careful, but familiar, tension between you two. “baby, give me a sec. i’m c-close,” he mutters.

wanting to see what he looks like when he finishes, you grin, dragging your hips down harder and slower, in a teasing manner. he groans, but with the same teasing energy, bucks his hips up into yours, allowing you to feel just how big he is—and he knows it, too. judging by your reaction, he can tell it’s been a while since you’ve both been intimate with someone else. 

feeling his release closer than he’d say out loud, he takes control of your movements, speeding them up. you can feel how badly he needs this. how desperate he needs you.

the friction of his covered cock rubbing repeatedly on your sensitive clit, feels better than anything you’ve ever tried with others or yourself. you’re both panting, forehead to forehead, when everything comes crashing down. riki releases into his gray sweats, making a mess. he swears he’s never cum that hard. and your panties get increasingly sticky and uncomfortable.

basking in the aftermath of your shared orgasm, riki gently holds you by the waist, whispering sweet nothings into your ear. lots of “you did great,” “that felt so good, baby,” and a lot of whining. “i need you so bad,” “please, angel, i’ll make you feel so so good.” 

who are you to deny your first and only love?

you slowly stand on wobbly legs, stripping, giving riki a show. 

he gawks as you remove each item of clothing, starting with your shirt. he’s surprised you aren’t wearing a bra but when your perky tits come into his eyesight, he’s right in front of you. grabbing—licking—whatever’s closest to his mouth and hands. 

feeling a bit exposed, while he’s still fully clothed, you whimper into his mouth, silently asking him to take his clothes off as well.

speeding up the process, he rips his tank top off and finally. finally. you get a glimpse of what he always hides under his baggy hoodies. sculpted by the greek gods, you nearly drool at his defined torso. reaching out to drag a hand down his abs, riki shivers at your gentle, yet burning, touch. 

you back him up so he sits on his bed and slowly sink to your knees. he leans back on his palms, quiet, but watching you like a hawk. you bring a hand up to cup his bulge, not caring about the sticky stain he’s left. 

he groans, low, hot, and it goes straight to your wetness, practically leaking on his floor. 

with your hands gripping his waistband, you look up into his dark eyes, clouded with lust, and he nods lifting his hips. yanking his sweats down, you’re met with his hard cock, slapping his abs. “no boxers, huh?” you smugly ask, as if he anticipated this. “nah, not when i’m relaxing, sweetheart.” sweetheart. the name he called you the last day you saw him as kids. 

staring at his flushed cock, you lick your lips, ready to devour the man sitting in front of you.

you start by gripping his base, your fingers not fully wrapping around him. how the fuck are you supposed to fit him inside your mouth? a problem you’ve never faced, but for riki? you’d be stupid not to choke on it. 

giving his tip sweet little kitten licks, you dig your tongue into his slit, as if you were trying to drink up all his precum. “fuck,” he grunts out, hoping you didn’t discover how sensitive he was at his tip. 

he thinks you didn’t, but he should really know better. 

you focus all your attention on his swollen head, sucking softly and jerking off the rest of his lengthy dick. his back falls flat, resting on his bed, while he lets out a symphony of moans. 

abruptly, you pull off him and when he leans up on his elbows to see why, he’s met with the sight of spit falling from your lips, landing right on his tip. then, his vision goes white.

you lean down, shoving him in your mouth, lips stretched around his girth. 

you take him halfway, and the stretch alone is painful already. knowing this might be an issue, riki speaks up, “fuck, you don’t have to take all of me, this already feels so—” but you cut him off, when you sink your mouth further, his tip hitting your throat. 

you swallow around him and he whimpers. he’s never felt anything like this before.

when he’s tried to hook up with girls in the past, they normally gave up after a minute of trying to unhinge their jaw to please him. 

but with you? he should’ve known you’d be the one to make him proud. 

noticing how surprised he is, you start bobbing your head up and down, spit pooling at the corners of your mouth. 

it’s messy, wet, and loud. but neither of you care. not when riki is whimpering beneath you so prettily. 

his tip repeatedly slams into the back of your throat, making you gag but it just turns him on more. his thighs start to tense and he knows he’s close to his second orgasm. 

feeling him twitch in your mouth, you hollow your cheeks and ignore the tears streaming down your face. only focused on his pleasure. you know exactly what will push him over the edge, so you bring your mouth up his cock, lips wrapped carefully around his tip. 

swirling your tongue around it, occasionally focusing on his slit, you bring one hand up to his balls and the other to wrap around his base, applying pressure to the vein running along his shaft. 

one second later, your mouth gets flooded with his sticky, hot cum. rope after rope shooting from his enlarged tip. his dick is pulsing in your mouth and his cum never ends. it’s spilling out of your mouth onto the floor, but you try and swallow everything you can, not wanting to waste even a drop. 

his chest is rapidly rising and falling when you pull off of him with a pop. you wipe your mouth with the sleeve of your shirt and smile sweetly at him, acting like you didn’t just suck him so good his soul left his body.

“damn, baby, didn’t know you wanted me that bad.” he says through a smirk. “calm down nishimura, i could’ve filled up a gallon of water with how much you came,” you bite back. he just looks at your tear stained cheeks and a sense of pride swells in his chest. 

while he’s lost in his thoughts, you stand up, knees bruised from his hardwood floor. 

glancing between his legs, you notice he’s still hard. how much cum does he have for you? you wonder, taking off your jeans and panties in one go. 

now that you’re both fully naked, riki gets up off his bed and approaches you, holding one of your hands. he spins you around, taking in your fully nude body for the first time. 

noticing his staring, you open your mouth, “are you just gonna stare or fuck me?”

smoothly, he leads you to lie down on his bed, “patience, princess, be good for me while i take care of you, yeah?” oh you’re gone already.

he leans down to kiss you and your hands find his nape, gently grabbing the hair trailing down his neck. 

you mistook riki for an ass guy, when his fascination with your tits makes you break the kiss. he’s sucking gently on your right nipple, his free hand finding your left boob. 

moaning gently, you tip your head back into his pillow that smells like comfort, and something musky, but it’s something extremely riki. you instinctively arch into his touch, bare core desperately grinding into the air of his bedroom, desperate for friction. 

he senses your neediness, bringing his stiff cock down to rub between your soaked folds. his tip catches your clit, eliciting soft whimpers from your parted lips. using your slick as lube, he lines himself up, stopping before he goes further. “condom?” he sweetly asks. you whisper, under your breath, “n-no, i’m on birth—,” however, you don’t get to answer him when you feel his tip slide into your awaiting hole. 

both moaning in relief, he stays with just his tip in, preparing you for the stretch that’s about to come. you relax a bit, a signal for him to push a bit further, cutting off his action with a loud moan. 

it’s better than any porn he could dream of, and he’s only about two inches in. the sheer girth of him alone makes it feel like he’s splitting you open in the best way possible. 

you look down, thinking he’s halfway in, when in reality, he’s about a fourth of the way inside you. meeting his eyes, he senses your nerves, bringing a hand down to rub your sensitive bundle of nerves.

it helps distract you from the pain, allowing him to slide half way in. he groans at the sensation of your warm, wet walls, engulfing his aching cock. “baby, you gotta relax… you’re s’tight,” he drunkenly mumbles. you can only whimper in response, exhaling as you try to calm down.

once your breathing has returned to a normal state, riki slowly pushes in more, but it all comes to a halt when you wrap your legs around his torso, pulling him all the way in. 

he moans, caught off guard, guessing your patience snapped like a thin wire. 

as his thick length rests inside you, you can’t help but let out a string of moans, incoherently babbling about how big he feels, and how deep he’s reaching. 

“f-fuck. baby, please, can—can i move?” he forces out. you hum in agreement. 

he slowly pulls out until only his tip is sheathed inside your warm pussy, then pushes back in all the way. your eyes roll into the back of your head, “fuck. s—s’big, riks.” his pace steadily increases until he notices how your boobs bounce with each thrust he gives you. 

he brings his head down, lips wrapping around one of the perky budd, giving you even more pleasure than you knew what to do with. 

loud moans grace his ears, the only other sound being skin slapping. 

his attention is dragged back to your face when one of your hands reaches for his and brings it up to your neck. his pace falters for a bit until his face contorts, realization dawning over his lust filled features. “oh? does my baby wanna be choked? dirty slut.” you nod in response. 

feeling the pressure of his cold ring clad fingers wrapping around your burning flesh, you let out a sigh of relief, the tension in your tummy building at a rapid pace. 

riki suddenly pulls out of you, flipping you on all fours, placing a pillow under your stomach. he drags your hips up, kneading the plumpness of your ass. he slams back into you, reaching even deeper in your guts, as he hovers over your back. 

“you like feelin’ me this deep, hm?” he takes your hand and places it over the bump you feel with every thrust. your noises are muffled by his bed, which ticks him off—he wants to hear every sound that slips through your mouth. noticing that you liked things a bit rough, he pulls your hair, bringing you flush against the hardness of his chest. 

he stills inside you, letting you feel every inch, twitch, and pulse. he’s holding off his orgasm for as long as he can, but he’s not sure how long he can last when you keep clenching around him. 

he knows it’s unintentional, but it feels too good, he just needs a second. 

you can feel him breathing down your neck when you begin to move. he tries stopping you, but to no avail, you start bouncing on his stiffened cock. 

“f-fuck. gonna—cum,” he moans when he attempts to pull out. you push him back down, needing to feel him fill you up. “no. inside,” is all you can muster when he makes a sound of confusion. 

slowly gaining confidence, you turn around, and flip him over so you’re on top of him. 

flustered by the change in positions, riki gasps when you start to move. his hand finds your clit, rubbing in tight circles. 

the band in your stomach starts building, fueling both of your desperation. 

your orgasm comes crashing down in waves, pushing riki to buck his hips up, fucking you through it. “that’s it, baby, let it out. c’mon, be a good girl f’me and make a mess,” he mutters out, wanting to prolong your pleasure for as long as he can. 

as you cum, your walls uncontrollably clench around his dick, making it harder for him to slide in and out. he starts to chase his own high, gently placing your head back on his pillow and picking up your legs to rest on his shoulders. 

he pistons in and out of you, mind hazy, consumed with the need to cum inside of you. 

groaning, he stills in your abused cunt, flooding you with the gift of his cum. each pulse, you clench around his hard cock, milking him dry. 

he’s on cloud nine, feeling the way you’re taking everything he could possibly offer you.

just as he thinks he’s nearing the end of his high, you whisper in a sultry voice, “you’re still hard, riks,” which makes his skin flush a deep red. his balls tighten and somehow a couple more ropes of cum shoot into your womb. he doesn’t know what you do to him, “take it out on me, baby, i can’t imagine how pent up you must be…” and that does it for him. 

wanting to try something new, he straddles your torso, pushing your plush tits together. he aligns his sensitive cock between the flesh and slowly slides through. you stick your tongue out, trying to lick his tip each time it peeks between your boobs. 

his cock is nearly too thick for your tits to wrap around him, but he doesn’t care. the sight is more than enough for him to finish. 

he’s already close. 

the sensitivity gets to him when you begin to hold your tits together, giving him an unobstructed view of you. each time your tongue laps at his slit, he feels himself growing closer to the high he so badly craves. 

what really does it for him, is when you spit between your breasts, further lubing his cock. with a low, drawn-out moan, he paints your tits and face with his cum. the sight is too much, his balls go into overdrive, pulsing out more and more ropes of his white, messy load. 

your mouth hangs open, wanting to taste more of the salty substance. he thinks you’re perfect. 

he collapses on top of you, feeling spent and tired. it’s only when you whine about the stickiness between your legs, on your boobs, and on your face that he gets out of bed, rushing to his bathroom. 

he makes his way back over to you with a warm washcloth, and the softest touch you’ve ever felt. he gently cleans the mess he made, only now realizing how much cum he gave you. 

and you took all of it. his good girl.

once he’s done wiping away his mess, he picks you up bridal style, heading back to his bathroom. to your surprise, he drew you a bath, with scented candles—lavender. he remembered your favorite. 

he helps you into the tub, climbing in behind you. he shampoos your hair, conditions it, and even washes your body with such care, it brings tears to your eyes. 

after many hushed whispers, he drains the bathtub, helping you dry off and get into your (his) clothes. 

you both get back into his bed, snuggled against one another, riki’s embrace wrapped around you warmer than any blanket could provide. 

“riki?” you whisper, afraid to shatter the delicate silence. he hums in response. “please don’t leave me again,” you say trembling, a silent tear slipping down your cheek. 

he turns you to face him, “hey, hey, hey, baby, i’m right here. and i know what i did was shitty, you deserved an explanation. but. i couldn’t let you get caught up in what i was doing. it was risky, i couldn’t be what you deserve,” he croaks out, tears wetting his lashes. now it was your turn to comfort him, “oh my riki,” you cooed, cradling his face. 

“you did what you had to do, but what’s important is that you’re here now. with me. okay?” you plant the softest kiss on his plump lips. “okay,” he says with a small smile. 

you don’t let go. neither does he. his hands stay on your waist, tentative but needing, like he’s still trying to memorize the feel of you. your fingers linger against his jaw, your thumb brushing the damp skin beneath his eye. there’s silence between you, but it’s no longer heavy—just full. thick with everything that couldn’t be said before.

his lips brush against yours again—slower this time, deeper. like a question. and an answer. you lean in, the way you sigh into him. it’s not desperate, not rushed. it’s reverent.

when he pulls back just slightly, his forehead resting against yours, his breath is shaky. “i missed you,” he whispers, voice barely audible. “missed you so much i forgot how to breathe without it hurting.”

you cup his face in both hands now, heart aching in the best way. “i’m here. i’m not going anywhere.”

and then you kiss him again—like a vow sealed in warmth and want. like a beginning.

reblog if u enjoyed this! and comment or send an ask to be part of my perm taglist <3

[ @jaeyuniversal ] prod. 250419

My Journey to Escape the War in Gaza

My name is Abdelmajed. I never imagined I’d be sharing my story like this, but life in Gaza has become unbearable. I am a survivor of the war here, and in the blink of an eye, everything I once knew—my home, my safety, my community—was ripped away from me.

The war has transformed Gaza into a graveyard of broken dreams. The buildings that once stood as symbols of life and resilience are now piles of rubble. Every corner is filled with the echoes of explosions. Every moment is shrouded in uncertainty. There is no security. There is no stability. There is no light at the end of the tunnel.

Basic needs have become luxuries. Food is scarce. Clean water is even scarcer. Hospitals are overwhelmed and under-resourced, and there is almost no medical care to be found. Every night, families go to bed hungry, praying they’ll wake up to see another day. The cost of basic necessities has skyrocketed, and it’s become a daily battle just to survive.

I’ve seen things I never thought possible—standing in long lines for a piece of bread, rationing every drop of water, and watching my people suffer in silence. I have lost everything—my home, my safety, my dignity.

Escape from Gaza is my only hope, but it’s almost impossible without financial help. The cost of evacuation is far beyond my means, and without support, I’m trapped in a warzone with no way out.

I’m reaching out to you now, in the hopes that someone, anyone, can help. I am not asking for luxury. I am asking for a chance—just a chance—to live. A chance to escape this never-ending cycle of fear, destruction, and loss. A chance to rebuild my life somewhere safe, where I can begin again, where I can find hope once more.

Chuffed

Help Abdelmajed Escape Gaza and Rebuild His Life

My name is Abdelmajed, and I am a survivor of the war in Gaza. Everything I once knew has been taken away—my home, my safety, and the people

Any amount you can give will help me get closer to safety. Even the smallest donation will make a difference—it could be the lifeline I need to survive. If you are unable to donate, please share my story. The more people who hear it, the better the chance that I can find the support I desperately need.

Your kindness and support mean the world to me. You’re not just helping me escape a war; you’re giving me a chance to live, to rebuild, to breathe again.

Thank you for listening. Thank you for caring.

Vetted by @gazavetters

park sunghoon — THE PUSSY EATING COMPETITION!

P. munch!sunghoon x fem!reader (17+) | W. pussy eating (obv), squirting, oral, unprotected sex, cursing, multiple orgasms, munches jakehoon + munchwon , freakseung, subspace, biting, other shit i forgot | WC. 5.7k !! | A,N. this one’s for my babychels ! @ak4e7a ♡ … would anyone like a drabble about heeseung’s experience?

in which… jake convinces sunghoon to join a pussy eating competition with a bet !

“you want me to join the what?” sunghoon questioned, his thick eyebrows furrowed, plump lips parted in confusion.

“the pussy eating competition, bro!” jake rolled his eyes as he repeated his sentence for the third time already. reaching over to flick a concerned looking sunghoon’s forehead.

“and why the fuck would i join whatever the fuck that is?” he smacked jake’s hand away when the stinging pain rushed in his head. cursing jake more under his breath. “why the fuck not?” he huffed, “heeseung was at it yesterday, he won his stupid bet with jay.”

“they had a bet?” sunghoon closed his laptop, deciding that whatever notes he was about to take from their lecture can wait until he figures out if jake is being serious or not. “yeah, dude. jay bet heeseung fifty bucks if he could make his girl squirt three times in ten minutes.” jake chuckled at the memory.

“and heeseung won?” sunghoon questioned, eyebrows raised in anticipation this time as jake’s smile only widened. “won the bet in eight minutes and twenty six seconds.” he laughed, sunghoon wasn’t surprised or shocked in any way. he was surprised at jay’s idiocy of choosing ‘ten minutes’ when all heeseung has been doing since he got laid was boast about his squirting ability in their group chat.

and heeseung called himself ‘the pussy squirting fairy’ way too often for their liking.

and besides who even came up with this stupid competition in the first place? who even agreed to any of this? why did heeseung and jay join? and why the fuck was jake asking him to join too?

“listen bro it’s nothing serious— you go to the pussy eating competition center and ask to join in for a competition with someone— in that case that will be me, and then we’ll get to eat some fire pussy out for free so it’s really just a huge win situation.” jake rambled, balancing between his two feet as he continued to convince sunghoon to join in with him.

“we could even place a bet like hyung and jay did! ten minutes for three squirts is a good deal you know? it’s just that heeseung is a fucking frea—“ jake’s voice slowly got tuned out of sunghoon’s ear as he thought about this more.

considering all the possibilities of this competition that still sounded pretty unreal to him, was this a stupid idea? yes. should he trust jake? no. did he not believe this idea because it sounded like a dream? yes. was the last time that sunghoon got offered pussy around three months ago? unfortunately, yes. did he currently feel like a loser teenage boy with his pants tightening at the thought of eating pussy? … also yes.

but was this an opportunity for him to live up to his ‘certified munch hoon’ title though? yes. and was sunghoon going to take it? fuck yes.

“you could also tap out at any minute—“ “where can i apply?” sunghoon interrupted jake’s irritating speech. “it’s not tha— huh?” his eyes widened in surprised, “you want to join?” he tilted his head to the side in a puppy like manner, a twinkle of excitement in his gaze. “you said you were going to join too, right?” sunghoon eyed him warily, a wave of relief washing down on him when jake nodded with enthusiasm.

“you also said we could place bets, yeah?” he questioned, “yes! like the ten minutes for three squirts hyung mad—“ “make it five.” jake gaped at him, blinking his eyes in surprise. “what?”

his hand came up to rest on sunghoon’s shoulder as he tried to process his words, “five minutes?” his gaze became conflicted as the younger nodded, “five minutes for three?” jake tried to understand him more, really trying his best.

“five minutes for five squirts.” jake gulped.

“for a hundered bucks.”

well fuck.

sunghoon was on a mission.

wearing a white, sleeveless shirt along with jeans to make his movements easier, the shirt given to him by jake in order to ‘tell apart who got the more squirts’ according to the wetness that coated the white fabric.

he was now standing in line with jake, the shorter one walking with a slight bounce in his step from his excitement. “are you ready?” he whispered, eyes travelling all over the place where the competition was held.

countless other contestants from both genders aligned in the waiting line, each pair waiting their own turn, some going neck to neck with other friends and placing bets while others threw snarky glances at each other.

truly a competition for some.

“do we atleast get to pick who we get to eat out?” the taller sighed, his ebony locks sticking further to his temples due to his sweat, it was either unreasonably hot or sunghoon was weirdly nervous.

probably unreasonably hot. it was mid july after all.

“i don’t think so.. i didn’t ask hyung—“ “obviously no.” a foreign voice cut off jake, making the two turn around to greet another guy. that was also wearing a white shirt.

“it’s a competition. you don’t get to choose who you get to eat out.” he rolled his eyes as if it was the most obvious thing. god what an obnoxious attitude.

sunghoon rolled his eyes, “pipe the fuck down, jungwon. we get it you practically live here.” jake snapped back. running his fingers through his hair while he turned around. he looked unusually restless for sunghoon’s liking.

i mean, there was a whole hundred dollar bill on the table for this bet.

“park sunghoon and sim jaeyun! you’re up next.” the same guy who jotted down their names in his board, who sunghoon assumed was the manager— called both of their names up to the front.

where sunghoon wasn’t prepared to have his breath knocked out of his lungs so quickly.

as he and jake stepped up the smal staircase leading to the mini stage where two chairs were situated, there sat two girls. very very pretty girls. dreamlike pretty girls. one hundred percent sunghoon’s type. really really pretty gir—

“stop fucking staring like a creep.” jake elbowed him when he realised that sunghoon was basically two seconds away from drooling at the sight of you. sunghoon covered his awkward staring with a strained cough. lowering his head and unknowingly bringing attention to his reddening ears.

which at the sight of, you chuckled.

and sunghoon’s knees almost buckled.

“take your respective positions and be prepared.” the manager, who sunghoon caught a brief glance at the name tag of— mark. ordered them around. sunghoon stepped closer towards you. who stared at him with the most alluring glint in your eyes. you were wearing a pink top with pink lace panties that were covered by a feather light towel. don’t ask how he noticed them.

“hi.. i’m sunghoon.” he spoke awkwardly, extending out his hand towards yours. finding his demeanour adorable, you quickly shook his hand. a smile gracing your features as you introduced yourself to him.

three months shouldn’t be that much time since he got with a girl but it felt like it was centuries ago. especially with the way his heart began to thump thump thump! between his ribs weirdly.

he spared a swift glance to jake, just in time to catch him throwing a flirtatious wink towards his own girl. goodness that dude was a freak himself.

“spare the introductions and get into your positions, what was your bet again?” mark quickly muttered, glancing at the paper in his hand and back at jake and sunghoon. pushing his glasses above the bridge of his nose.

“a hundred bucks.” jake spoke, puffing out his chest in anxiety, “and that’s for ten minutes right? three orgasms in ten?” mark nodded as he wrote down the timing on his paper.

“no actually… it’s five minutes.” jake bit his lips, sunghoon shook his head in slight disbelief and embarrassment at the current situation they were in right now. totally ignoring the fact that there were two drop dead gorgeous girls whispering and giggling right behind them both.

“five minutes for three?” mark questioned, his eyebrows raising in surprise that increased when sunghoon quickly shook his head in denial, “five minutes for five.” mark blinked.

a slight echoing line of ooo’s made their way into jake and sunghoon’s reddened ears, embarrassment crawling up their backs as mark awkwardly cleared his throat and nodded to their words. quickly changing the numbers on the timer and scribbling a few other random sentences on his board.

“we’ll shortly start the timer and the competition will begin.” he stepped back allowing the two to inch back towards the girls, jake spared a quick glance at mark who was now holding onto the alarm clock between his fingers before lowering down to his knees in front of the chair.

sunghoon swiftly followed suit, dropping onto his knees and lifting his head right between your legs to welcome the heavenly view. gosh you looked divine.

“five for five, hm?” you cheekily smiled at him, a sight that made the boy’s heart throb with the sudden need to always make you smile. he nodded shyly, his slightly wavy locks ruffling in his hair in a fluffy manner at the motion. “better not disappoint.” you then discarded the towel to the ground.

“oh i for sure won’t.” sunghoon smirked, a wave of confidence descending on him at the sight of your soaked cunt so close to his face, he could practically taste your leaking essence from the side of your panties.

“on your marks..” the young manager called out, sunghoon skilfully pulled apart your plush thighs, placing your legs on top of his shoulders as jake did the same besides him. you quickly laid back towards the table behind you on your elbows, giving sunghoon full access to anything and everything.

“get set..” mark called out, eyes glued on the button that will start the timer while sunghoon pushed the tip of his nose against your slit, the contact making you hum in delight as his tip pressed against your throbbing clit while your essence soaked through the thin fabric and onto his skin.

he poked his tongue out just slightly, brushing against your sopping hole restricted by the lace fabric that began to slightly irritate him, and sunghoon was gone.

pineapples. cotton candy. cranberries. straight sugar. you tasted otherworldly. it was not surprising that you would taste delicious as you probably do take care of yourself to the best of your ability because of this competition, but for you to taste this dizzying? to have an essence and nectar that melted against his tastebuds like honey?

sunghoon was gone.

“go!” and just like that, sunghoon’s brain was replaced by a horny puddle of mush inside of his skull. unaware of the fact that he pushed and teared your panties to the side, aiming to lick a long, tantalising stripe starting from your hole till he reached your clit where he applied pressure.

the action made your hand shoot towards his head, gripping a handful of his soft hair in your hands as his tongue circled and pushed against your sensitive nub, his large fingers pried your thighs apart when they began to push against him. normally, sunghoon wouldn’t mind getting suffocated by plush and soft thighs like this. yet today, he couldn’t lose a hundered dollar bill against jake. out of all people.

and fucking jake was going at it next to him. making all sorts of wet noises that had his girl throwing her head back in pleasure. while the timer struck twenty five seconds.

fuck, he only had thirty five seconds left for the first minute.

that’s when sunghoon decided to let go of all of his restraints, allowing all the walls he kept to crumble right apart when he pushed your legs around his head, one hand holding your leg to keep your pressed against him as you needed the extra support while the other pushed his middle and ring finger deep inside of you.

a squeal left your mouth when sunghoon attached his plump lips around your clit. sucking and slurping so loudly, obscene noises followed by your moans and the ticking of the timer barely made their way past sunghoon’s ringing ears. he was completely out of it.

he thrusted his finger in and out. quickly in and out. too busy closing his eyes to savour your flavour on his tongue to take notice of the multiple webs of wetness that connected his knuckles and your entrance. his fingers reached so deep, they were so long and the perfect size to cause the most delicious burn in your walls as he stretched them open.

right when the timer hit forty seconds, sunghoon’s fingertip brushed against your sweet spot.

you mewled his name, back arching off of the table as he hummed in delight at the realisation, “found it, didn’t i? it’s right. here.” he accentuated every word with another thrust against the spot that had you seeing stars. you nodded mindlessly as the knot in your abdomen curled on itself the longer sunghoon abused your cunt.

“f-fuck yes! right there, baby. right there.” you encouraged him, moans increasing in volume the harsher sunghoon sucked around your clit, his fingers became even more restless after the sudden petname. baby. that’s right, he was your baby. the only one that will please you from now on.

“yeah, pretty girl? feels good doesn’t it?” sunghoon spoke against your clit, each word sending a vibration right against your spine as pleasure raked through your body in rough waves. it suddenly felt like you were the only two in the world. your surroundings melting in an instant as you gasped his name and praised him for making you feel so good. so ecstatic.

fifty seconds in, and that’s when the coil in your abdomen suddenly snapped.

your climax washed over you out of nowhere, such an intense and speedy build up that you weren’t even able to process anything till you started to shake under sunghoon’s hold. your wetness was dripping down his forearm as he fucked you through your orgasm, each thrust of his finger made your squirt land over his shirt.

first sixty seconds was a complete and easy success.

“first minute is done! one point for sunghoon, and one point for jaeyun.” mark called out. shit, so that fucker also managed to keep up with him then?

he still had four minutes to redeem himself. with the way he was able to easily make you squirt from the first fifty seconds he felt like he knew your body inside out. knew exactly which buttons to push and what nerve to pull to coax out another orgasm out of you. there was no way he was losing.

“minute two starting now!” mark’s voice reached sunghoon’s ears in a muffled manner as he pressed your twitching legs closer to his shoulders, this time sunghoon pushed his long tongue inside of your gushing hole. a lustful glint in his eyes as he reached his slender fingers towards your clit.

rubbing slow, torturous but powerful circles on your aching nub while he licked all over your walls, slurping against your wetness that leaked down his chin and made its way down his neck, fuck he was so addicted to your flavour.

your moans became weaker as your body tried to calm down from your previous orgasm, such a mind blowing climax washing down on your body so suddenly made your head spin. and sunghoon was already overstimulating you as he worked towards another orgasm. fuck. you, yourself were done for under him.

he felt so good. so skilled as he satisfied and pleasured you in ways you’ve never felt before. his strong, muscular arms keeping your legs open as he buried his face so mindlessly between them, diving into your wetness with no other care in the world as if he was born to do this.

he lived to devour pussy. truly suitable for a competition like this.

“gonna give me another one hm?” twenty nine seconds.

“think you can handle another one, babydoll?” he taunted, barely pulling out his tongue to speak before burying it back inside of you, his fingers never halting to a stop as they began to pinch and pull at your clit. the familiar tightening in your lower stomach made your mind reel while your silence began to frustrate sunghoon.

that’s when he landed a harsh slap against your clit. the sudden pain and pleasure making you jolt under his hold as you nearly screamed out his name. “y-yes, yes i can! please, i’ll give you as many as you want!” you cried out, your broken begs rushing directly into his aching cock in the confines of his jeans. exactly what he needed to hear.

“what a good fucking girl, hm? such a good girl for me, aren’t ya?” he mocked, hand resorting back to circling on your clit as he buried himself in your folds, his nose brushed up against his fingers while he thrusted his tongue in and out of you stimulating you in the best ways possible.

thirty seven seconds was all it took for sunghoon to make you squirt on him for the second time. in the span of a minute and a half.

he slapped against your leaking hole while you convulsed beneath him, each slap getting his shirt wetter which signalled mark to announce “minute two half way done, two points for sunghoon and one for jaeyun!”

jake’s noise of surprised went unnoticed by sunghoon, almost half way in. he thought to himself as he lifted your limp legs off of his shoulders and balanced himself on his knees again.

he pressed your legs together, making your swollen, glistening folds puff up one each other while your nectar slipped out of your hole in heavy, clear droplets. sunghoon wanted to do nothing more than to slurp it all up.

without wasting anymore time, he pushed his mouth against your cunt, kissing up against your folds as the timer showcased fifty seconds, as cocky as this might sound but he already knew he won. especially when he inhaled your scent deeply and pushed his nose and mouth onto your entrance again. successful in making you scream his name this time.

he held your shaking legs up with one hand, grip strong and tight as he relished in your flavour running down his throat. so addicted as he ate you out like a drunk man. completely high on your pussy. he sucked and licked and kissed everywhere so noisily.

sucking up your swollen and sensitive folds into his mouth, coating every inch of your skin in his saliva that combined with your own wetness before returning to slurp around your clit. his mind was reeling. becoming a mushy piece of muscle in his head as the only thought that drove him to continue was to make you squirt again.

“minute three starting now, with two points to sunghoon and two points to jaeyun. yet another tie!” fuck, jake was catching up.

but sunghoon for some reason was starting to not mind.. call it the euphoria of getting high off of pussy or anything else. he no longer wanted to do this to beat jake and win a hundred dollars. he wanted to do this because it felt good. you felt good.

and just like that, he began to indulge himself in your cunt entirely. surrendering and making his rational side disappear as he hummed and moaned at your taste. shaking his head from side to side as he slurped you up so well. drooling your essence further down his chin as he pleasured you because it was his own pleasure.

each moan of his sent shocks around you body. your surroundings blurring as the air around you became electrified. goosebumps aligning your skin when you felt another climax building up gradually in your abdomen. the longer he spent humming around your clit and buzzing up your whole body the further you felt your consciousness slipping away from your fingertips.

guess you couldn’t really handle it after all.

it was at three minutes and fifteen seconds when sunghoon made you squirt for the third time.

your hands shot to grip onto the chair that was by now shaking with your body, hot white ecstasy blinding your vision as your climax washed down on your body in violent waves one after the other. and sunghoon just kept going. noisily slurping up everything you offered. he was being so embarrassingly loud as he kept rubbing his face into your cunt, getting your wetness all over his face and jaw. overstimulating you more with each passing second while your eyes rolled to the back of your head.

“three minutes and twenty seconds in! three points for sunghoon and two for jake!” mark announced, his voice becoming unusually strained as the sight of the two men on their knees doing their best to pleasure their girls was starting to get to him.

it was his least favourite part of his job when he started to feel a tightening in his pants.

“so good for me, doll. we only need two more, come on. you can give it to me right?” you nodded with your head spinning. a dizzying sense of pleasure raking through your veins. sunghoon settled down for gentle bites across your thighs, giving you a few moments to cool down as he looked up.

big mistake.

the sight of you had one of his hands shooting down towards his raging boner that began uncontrollably twitching between his boxers. your pretty pink tank top ridden up revealing the underside of the plush skin of your breasts, a sheen layer of sweat coating your body as you breathed in deeply to calm your heart down when it felt like it was seconds away from bursting.

your fucked out expression is what did it for him. eyes hazed and high off pleasure. drunk on the feeling of his plump lips on your swollen cunt that tightened around nothing. sunghoon was so fucked.

“so needy for me isn’t she..?” he whispered only for you to hear, fascinated in the way your gaping hole winked at him. spilling out more of your sweet nectar that became sunghoon’s favourite drug in the matter of a few minutes. you grew flustered at his words, lifting your arm up t cover your eyes while sunghoon blew on your pussy teasingly.

discarding the competition and the fact that there were people around him, sunghoon quickly lifted himself up, leaning his body forward above yours as he began to hover on top of you. your breath hitched at the close proximity while sunghoon smiled adorably, showcasing you his pretty fangs that were sinking down your thighs just a few seconds ago.

“ready to give me another one, little girl?” he whispered. so so close to your face that his wet lips that were covered in your essence brushed against yours with every word. you nodded shyly, slowly getting fucked into subspace as your mind began to shut down. eyes blinking slowly while sunghoon pushed his long fingers back inside of you. gosh you were so cute.

three minutes and thirty two seconds in, and you were gripping onto sunghoon’s bicep that pushed his fingers inside of you deeper.

you were mewling and whimpering his name so prettily. so perfect and delicate under him. under his control allowing him to do anything with your body and it was driving him crazy. he couldn’t hold himself back when he finally pushed his lips against yours.

you moaned so endearingly under him. kissing him back so eagerly as his fingertip massaged your sweet spot making you bite gently on his lower lip. he groaned into your mouth as he fucked his fingers quicker. hitting all your spots with each thrust and making you see stars while he sucked on the tip of your tongue.

he didn’t care that he could be breaking rules right now. did not give a singular flying fuck that mark could be looking around confused wondering if this was accepted. and certainly did not even mind when jake scored his third point. all he wanted and needed right now was for you to cum for him as many times as possible. he needed to feel you tightening as your euphoria made you fall apart in his hold. it was a pleasure that he got addicted to.

“you close baby? feeling good hm?” he didn’t even need you to respond to him. not when your cunt was doing all the talking by clenching and drooling down his wrist. sucking in three of his fingers in so deeply he could only imagine how incredible you would feel around his cock, but in reality he shouldn’t imagine that right now. not when his dick was about to practically rip apart his boxers.

“s’close hoon.. so so close!” you blabbered, brain completely shutting down as you couldn’t tell apart your orgasm and overstimulation anymore. all you could feel and process was the unbelievable amount of pure ecstatic pleasure rushing throughout your whole body so wonderfully that it had you digging your nails into his back. your legs going numb under you as your knot tightened and tightened for the fourth time. almost done.

“come on, babydoll. cum for me like the good girl that you are.” he whispered against your neck and that was enough for you to squirt around his fingers again. he kept fucking into you, riding out your orgasm as your throat was no longer able to produce any noises, only soft whispers of pleads reaching sunghoon’s ear as he scored his fourth point easily.

he kissed along your jawline when he stilled his fingers inside of you, “please what, pretty girl?” he asked, already having a fleeting wild thought in his head that he discarded because he might actually lose his sanit— “i need your cock please. please for the last one, please fuck me.” holy fuck.

“three minutes and fifty six seconds in! four points for sunghoon and three for jaey— why are you taking your pants o?—“ mark’s voice became unreasonably loud towards the end but sunghoon was on a mission.

five squirts is five squirts. a hundred dollar bill is a hundred dollar bill. he’s not about to lose any of this because he didn’t push his cock into a pretty little hole like yours. no he was about to make his win a double win.

sunghoon pushed down both his jeans and boxers down in one go, his leaking cock springing out the tight pieces of fabric with multiple lines of precum dribbling down to his balls, thick mushroom tip that’s a fiery red throbbing in need and desire while your swollen hole gaped at him.

yeah he was gonna lose if he didn’t fuck you for sure.

“you ready, doll?” he asked as if he hadn’t spent the past few minutes stretching you out so nicely. you nodded so eagerly at his words. mouth watering at the sight of his veiny, thick cock pulsating so deliciously in front of you. he was so big. such a perfect size for stretching you out more.

he pushed the head of his cock in and god was he huge. you gasped around his lips when he gave you a few seconds to adjust before pushing his entire length in, bottoming out quicker than anticipated, but sunghoon didn’t care.

he couldn’t care less about the fact that he was fucking you in front of random people right now. why should he care when he knew he was going to bring you home by the end of the day and slither his way into your life after this? in fact, people should be glad because this will be the last time you’ll be seen here.

because he’s planning on having you in strawberry pink lingeries between his silky satin sheets for the rest of his life.

so technically, everyone should be glad they’re getting a show of you both right now. because it’ll be the last one.

“so deep hoon.. so fuckin’ deep..” you mewled, eyes shutting in pleasure when he slightly pulled out, barely by an inch before he thrusted back in. he felt the way your warm walls pulsed around his cock needily. sucking him back in with each movement as if they were not allowing him to pull out at all. so needy and so desperate to have something, anything to plug up your slutty hole.

“feeling good, pretty girl?” he asked, lowering his hand to press on the evident bulge that appeared on your lower stomach. the feeling made the two of you groan in pleasure, sunghoon was fleeting through cloud nine. he couldn’t believe how he went on with his life for so many years without spending each passing inside your cunt. so many time wasted when he could’ve been drunk on the heaven between your legs.

“s’good! so good, hoon.” gasping out the new petname that had his eyes rolling back, he glanced at the timer that was held by a flustered mark, palming his raging boner through his pants and noticed “four minutes and twenty nine seconds.” yeah the game was his. he won.

he switched his position, balancing himself back on his legs as he gripped your thighs, wrapping them around his waist while he sunk his cock in deeper. relishing in the sight of you throwing your head back when he penetrated you so good. the tip of his dick kissing against your cervix harshly. and just like that, he began to pound inside of you.

your unrestrained moans tumbled past your lips at his harsh thrusts. body being lit ablaze with mind numbing pleasure that enlivened every part of you. a different, never felt before kind of thrill rushed through your being. a fervent sensation that you’ve never experienced, one only brought to you by sunghoon as he continued to fuck you. determined on making you crumble completely around his cock.

and his wish was about to be granted with the way your abdomen began to tighten. exhaustion creeping up on you along with an almost scary build up of your climax. you were about to get knocked out with this one and you felt it.

“come on, angel. give me another one. the final one, i know you can do it, doll.” he encouraged, pressing his hand on his bulge that disappeared and appeared with every one of his thrusts, his large hand applying the perfect amount of pressure to have your head spin again. seconds away from cumming on his cock for the first time. his tip pressed and massaged all of your spots perfectly. “it’s right here, isn’t it? this is where you’re weak for me.” he chuckled.

you were slowly losing consciousness at this rate, body burning with euphoria that flashed through your limbs. “f-fuck i’m s’close! hoon— fuck!” you screamed his name as you felt your pleasure crashing down on you for the fifth time. walls tightening and clenching mercilessly making sunghoon hiss in pain while you squirted all over his abdomen.

the pressure from your orgasm made it hard for him to thrust back, but he continued. “and five points for sunghoon! at four minutes and fifty one seconds! park sunghoon is the winner of the pussy eating competition!” a new voice cheered from behind him, one that belonged to a taller manager that appeared since mark had to leave for a quick and ‘urgent’ bathroom break, making his best friend, johnny announce the winner.

but did the winner in question care right now? not really.

ignoring jake’s protests of disappointment and the sounds of his girl comforting him and finding him being upset adorable, also ignoring jake’s yells of shock and disbelief when he looked over and realised that sunghoon was currently balls deep inside of his girl. “i didn’t know you could literally fuck?!” he practically screamed at johnny as his girl tried to hold him back from jumping the taller guy.

yet all of this, went unnoticed by both you and sunghoon. who was now chasing his own pleasure inside of your divine pussy that kept trying to push him out while your back arched in his hold, pushing your chest against his as your body shook with complete overstimulation. he buried himself so deep inside of you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders as he hugged you when he pressed his tip against your cervix entirely before shooting his load inside of you.

both of you groaned in pleasure, sunghoon whimpering your name as his climax came down on him with intense ecstasy that coursed through his body. each nerve ending of his blazing with fire while his mind melted. you felt so unreal.

he finally came down from his high, allowing the two of you to catch your breaths as he was rooted still so deep inside of you. “you okay, doll?” he mumbled lowly only for you to hear, panting on your skin while you nodded tiredly, eyes clearly droopy and sleepy making him chuckle. finding all of your expressions so adorable.

“you did so good for me, little girl.” he kissed your lips, savouring the taste of you on his tongue and lips before he gently pulled away. pulling his softening length out and quickly fixing his clothing before grabbing your discarded towel to help clean you up. unaware of the fact that there was a looming, pissed jaeyun behind him like his shadow.

“what the fuck sunghoon!?” he suddenly yelled, making the two of you jump in surprise before you tiredly looked over and sunghoon angrily turned around. “the fuck are you yelling for?” he furrowed his eyebrows, seriously what was this dude thinking right now?

“you cheated!” he pointed his finger, eyes wide with the accusation as sunghoon only glanced at him one more time before returning to assist you. “didn’t he basically cheat?!” the shorter one turned around to face johnny who was too busy flirting with the next contestants, “yeah yeah you could do anything as long as you make the girl squirt, sim” he waved him off.

“why the fuck am i just knowing this?!”

at the end of the competition, sunghoon— as predicted won. he walked out of that place with not only an upset jaeyun and a hundred dollar bill, but also the love of his life.

a,note. thanks for reading !! (⺣◡⺣)♡

TWO'S A COMPANY

PAIRING : heeseung x fem!reader

GENRE : smut, stranded/locked in together, unprotected sex (stay safe and use condoms!), cunnilingus, multiple orgasms, breeding, use of nicknames (baby, princess, good girl), mention of thunderstorms, the reader has astraphobia, mentions of food and eating, heeseung is an annoying flirt but also a sweet heartthrob, a lot of cliché scenes, mentions of karina and ryujin as your friends, mentions of jake, attempt at romance, lots of kissing.

WC : 7.2k words

SYNOPSIS : a night at the abandoned cabin with your friends didn't sound bad to you initially, it was a mere dare afterall. but what if the whole group bails on you and heeseung, the only guy you don't get along with, to spend the chilly night together with no way to go home in the heavy rainstorm? “fucking helps in production of body heat, y'know?” heeseung more or less offered. “yeah? i'd rather freeze. no, thank you.”

WARNING : 18+ content, minors dni.

A/N : hihi! ohmygod im finally back with my last installment of the trope series, it broke my record of my longest fic ever, again </3 i totally didn't write the smut in my college but i really hope you guys enjoy reading it! all likes, comments, reblogs and feedbacks are highly appreciated, it keeps the writer going :D iloveyou all <3

It was a cold friday night as your friend group gathered at Jake’s place for your weekly movie party, which started off my making three bowls of popcorn–the snack which was expected to be eaten even before the movie started.

Sprawled on Jake's bed, you looked at your friends—Karina sitting down with Ryujin, Heeseung yet to arrive and Jake happily munching on the snack as he sat next to you with a pout, not being able to decide a movie.

The weather seemed to be gloomy outside in contrast to the excited chatter of your friends in the room which was highly unexpected considering how it was summer. The roads shimmered in sunlight the whole day which drastically changed into cold breeze by night, making the leaves rustle and fall to the ground.

You unconsciously stared at the bedroom door, zoning out in the process until Ryujin snapped her fingers in front of you.

“What are you staring at?” she asked, looking at the door to find anything amusing but she spotted nothing. Karina smirked, turning to face you.

“Are you mayhaps waiting for Heeseung?” her tone teasing which made you roll your eyes.

It was just a question, one regarding the guy you would've sworn you hated yet it made your heart beat faster just a tiny bit, making you cuss at it for being so pathetic.

“I was zoned out. Why would I wait for that menace?” you scoffed. Karina exchanged a look with Ryujin, you didn't question it at all as they did a lot more often than expected.

That's when the door opened to reveal the devil himself. Your eyes snapped open to look at him, his hair was partially wet maybe because of the drizzle outside and which made his shoulders damp, him being in dire need of changing. Jake stood up with wide eyes, guiding Heeseung to get one of his t-shirts. What others failed to notice was the brief smirk he had on his face when he caught you staring at him just for a second. You looked away, getting the remote to find a movie for tonight, gulping down the fact that you got caught staring.

“Should we watch horror this time?” you asked out just in time for Heeseung to come and get comfortable next to you. He wore Jake's t-shirt which was a bit too tight for his frame, his toned body slightly on display for you all.

Jake squealed, looking at all of you with big eyes as he suddenly remembered something when you talked about the horror genre.

“Guys do you know about the haunted cabin?” he asked, eyes shining with anticipation but he got no reply and only curious eyes, which made him frown.

Everyone looked at him with a questioning stare, eyes urging him to continue his story. He pouted and turned to face you all.

“Do you guys really not know about the haunted cabin near the forest on the outskirts of the city?” he questioned, proceeding to answer by himself.

You guys still weren't sure, coming from a small town meant that you guys just had to know each and every street of your place, the town being surrounded by forests from the east side also meant that there were a lot of cabins around.

“I saw it in a video the other day—that cabin is said to be spooky as someone was killed in there but the body was nowhere to be found.”

“That sounds–interesting.” you spoke up, looking at everyone for them to agree to it.

Karina teasingly smiled at Jake, “Why do you watch horror stuff knowing well enough that it will give you nightmares?” 

He scoffs as you all try not to laugh at the puppy looking boy in front of you. “I can stay there for the entire night! You scaredy cats cannot!” he spoke up, offended, making everyone laugh at him now.

“We all can survive it but I'm not sure about y/n, she's scared of ghosts.”

That's it, Lee Heeseung was back at it. It was favourite thing in the world to do—to tease you. The mischievous glint in his eyes said it already, he wanted to rile you up.

Heeseung had been like that ever since he met you in kindergarten, his purpose in life was to tease you which started in elementary school. He used to poke your back during the classes, steal your lunch on some days and even got you into trouble for ‘talking’ to him during the class.

Safe to say, Heeseung had been hellbent on making your life miserable, it was all a joke for him yet somehow your group always kept you together, asking you to ignore his harmless pranks.

“Ooh!” Jake jumped up, “So let's make a deal, I dare y'all to spend the night in the cabin, whoever wins and stays the entire night will get two weeks worth of my pocket money, what say?”

“I'm in.” Karina said, being the brave one and Ryujin soon followed the suit. Heeseung looked into your eyes, his smile only growing bigger, “I bet I'll last longer than y/n.”

You scoffed, “We'll see about that.” you turned to look at Jake, “Keep your pocket money ready for me, Jakey.”

Everyone cheered like a bunch of kids who got permission to visit the amusement park. After a minute of excitement, Jake put on Conjuring 2, immersing himself in the movie as he hugged the pillow to his chest. The light was dim, mostly coming out of the TV which made the room more calm, except for the screams Jake let out.

Heeseung leaned close to your ear, “You can back out, you know, baby?” his voice sent tingles down your spine which you very well ignored. Or at least tried to ignore.

You tilted your head to see how close he was to your face, “And why would I do that?”

He smirks, retorting with another snarky remark and a nickname which made you cringe, the argument rose to the point where no one paid attention to the movie but, stared at you both instead.

Your foreheads almost touched with how close you were and that's when you realised how childish you were being.

Heeseung smirked, holding your hand and whispering yet again, “Don't worry, baby. I'll take care of you.”

You opened your mouth to retort yet nothing came out so you resorted on smacking his head, making him yell out an ouch.

Jake watched the exchange with curious eyes, simply getting up, pushing Heeseung to the side and sitting down between you two, Heeseung being shocked for a second at what happened. Both your friends collectively slapped their head.

“What? They won't fight anymore!” he reasoned with big puppy eyes.

You gulped down, looking the other way while Heeseung did the same, staring away from Jake as the poor boy sat in between with a confused pout on his lips.

You had to prove him wrong.

You danced in your room while packing the essentials for your stay, some snacks and your nightwear, not forgetting to keep an extra pair of clothes for emergency purposes. It was a beautiful day outside, the sun shone bright—bright enough to make Groudon proud.

You mom was in the kitchen baking yet another batch of cookies which your friends adored. Your mom had always been like this, sending snacks even for the smallest of your picnics.

Your phone rang just as you zipped up your backpack, it was Ryujin. “Y/n!” she awkwardly coughed.

“Are you okay Ryu–” you asked as she cut you off.

“Perfectly fine, yes. I just had to discuss the seating arrangement with you actually.” your hum urged her to continue.

“So you know how the dance team has an event upcoming friday, right? The dance team has to stay back for a rehearsal so we'll be a tad bit late.” she explained.

“Oh—It's alright! I can wait with you guys–”

“No!” she exclaimed.

“Me, Rina and Jake can catch up later, you guys should leave first.” your eyed widened at her implementation.

“So you want me to go with Heeseung? In his car? Alone with him?”

“That's the plan, yes.” she says.

“He hates me, Ryu. He'll literally throw me out of the car and leave me stranded in the middle of nowhere–” you spoke, out of breath as your brain formed thousands of scenarios of what he could do to make you miserable this time.

“Y/n, calm down.” she almost screamed, muttering something in the lines of ‘he literally gives you heart eyes.’ But you were too busy running your mind for a possible escape.

You took a deep breath, listening to what she had to say, “We would have taken you with us but the car is four seater and you wouldn't be able to fit in with the bags on the seat.”

With a sigh, you muttered a small ‘i understand.’ You heard her sequel as she rushed to speak again, “Okay great! I've already told Hee to pick you up by seven so you still have three hours to pack your stuff. Now I've got to go, I love you, y/n! Bye.”

“I love you too, Ryu.” you chuckled at her excited tone but you also dreaded what the future held for you from here.

It was six thirty when the doorbell rang, you hadn't even called Heeseung to confirm your trip yet he was here, hugging your mother with the biggest smile on his face, mirroring that of your mom. Great, he's got everyone whipped for him, you thought.

He had been a charmer since he was a kid. Only, he tried to charm everyone else but you.

“You didn't tell me you were driving with Heeseung.” your mom asked with a smile, a smile that said she trusted him to drive you safely.

“Yeah it was a last minute thing.” you said, looking away now that Heeseung stared at you, a small smile on his face which screamed evil to you.

He followed you guys to the kitchen where your mom was packing the final set of your favourite cookies. Instead of handing them to you, she gave it to Heeseung, your mouth dropping at the interaction.

“Mom, that was supposed to me mine!” you complained with your jaw hanging open as Heeseung held the packet of cookies with a smirk.

“Y/n! You should share it with others too, you can get it anytime.” your mom said before giving Heeseung a smile, telling him it's okay for him to take it.

“Should we leave?” he asked you, his words so soft as of he'd always been good to you, A-class actor he had been, as he grabbed your backpack, carrying it to the car for you.

“Take care of her and yourself.” your mom said to him before leaving and he smiled in a comforting way, looking at you.

“I'll keep her safe.” he spoke in the most earnest voice he had ever used and you almost felt that he was genuine.

With a last good bye, he guided you towards his car, putting your backpack safely on the backseat as he expected you to sit in the front.

He held the door open for you and you sat down wordlessly, waiting for him to get in and drive you there as fast as possible.

You whipped out your phone from your pocket, texting Karina to tell her you're leaving for the cabin already.

She replied almost immediately, saying that they'll be free in two hours and would leave soon, meeting you directly at the cabin and wished you a good ride with a smirk emoji, which made you send her the middle finger one, closing the phone right after.

Heeseung sat down, starting the car engine as his big hands gripped the steering wheel. Just then he bend over to your side, his face right in front of yours which made you gasp and move back. He maintained the eye contact, the safely securing you with the seatbelt before he moved back with a smirk.

“What's wrong, baby?” he chuckled, putting his own seatbelt on before finally driving away from your home.

“Don't call me that!”

You sighed as he laughed. Such a great start to your trip.

Deciding that you can't bear to stay awake for the whole drive, you try to sleep, not wanting to stare at his face either, which looks a bit too pretty for your liking. His dark eyes paying attention to the road, his lip softly bitten with concentration now that he wasn't teasing you. Mellifluous voice of Ruelle played on the car speaker connected to his phone's bluetooth, his fingers tapping the steering wheel along to the beat, his soft lips singing along to the song in the lowest voice he could muster, yet it was loud enough for you to listen to.

The atmosphere awfully comfortable and calm, you felt content about it, Heeseung sneakily stole glances at you while your eyes appreciated the beauty outside. The sun was setting, the sky looked ethereal with all its colours mixing together, waving goodbye at the sun.

Temperature had dropped in comparison to the scorching heat of the afternoon. It had been half hour already since you left and the ride had been plenty quiet until Heeseung spoke up again.

“Are you hungry, baby?”

You rolled your eyes. “That's not my name.”

“I know. Baby.”

Ignoring the nickname and your fluttering heart, you said, “Yes I'm hungry.”

“Great, we have McDonald's right around the corner, baby.”

There he goes again with the name. It was enough to give you goosebumps and you weren't sure if you liked how your body was reacting to his tricks.

He turned the car, parking it in the parking lot, getting off just saying, “Stay here, baby.”

You stare at him, rolling your eyes. He didn't even bother asking what you wanted to eat and sprinted away.

“Why do I have to be stuck with him?” you asked to no one, muttering to yourself. You smiled slightly, remembering how he was singing the whole time, his voice sweeter than the honey, pretty enough for him to be a singer yet you would never admit that in front of him.

A knock on your window snapped you out of your thoughts, You open it up, grabbing the paper bag from him along with a drink.

Not only a drink, it was the one you loved. As for the meal, it was the one you usually ordered, the favourite one of yours.

You stared at it for a few seconds as Heeseung sat down, looking at you with a quizzical expression.

“What's wrong?” he genuinely inquired, his attention on you.

“This is my favourite order.” you said, still staring at it, heat rushing to your cheeks for some reason.

“Oh.” He let out, clearing his throat and looking elsewhere.

“How do you know that?” you tried not to be awkward about this.

“I–I don't know! I just got you random meal.” he stuttered and you smiled, knowing he can't lie to save his life.

It also made you wonder if he's this attentive with everyone in the group. Jake most certainly is not, he messed up your order despite you telling him what you wanted so, Heeseung knowing it made it even more puzzling for you.

Nevertheless, you started eating your meal, a small smile ghosting your face which didn't go unnoticed by him, his expression mirroring yours. Everything being peaceful again, in all good ways.

The rest of the drive wasn't that peaceful, Heeseung was back on track to tease your already irritated self, he called you all sorts of nicknames which flustered you, making you avert your attention by checking your phone. When that didn't work, he tried something new.

The devilish smile already told you that he was upto something, and he did. He kept his large hand on your thigh, the small touch sending a shiver down your spine. You didn't react for a minute, thinking he'd remove his hand on his own, but he only got more comfortable with you, giving it a light squeeze.

You swatted his hand away, “What are you doing, Heeseung?”

He bit his lip, happy to have gained your attention. “You liked it, didn't you?”

His question threw you off guard and you struggled while saying no.

Zoning out for a hot second, your brain ran at its fullest speed, thinking about his big hands inching closer to your core, cupping them and rubbing your clit–

You shook your head, denying whatever your brain was going through. “No! I d–don't!”

He chuckled again, his deep laugh resonating the car. You did realise that something about him was weirdly attractive to you lately. Maybe it's the way he paid more attention to you, maybe it's just the fact that Heeseung was a beautiful human to look at, even prettier when he sang with his guitar. You sighed, knowing you will get nothing even if you fall for him. He hates you after all.

Your mood went sour after the realisation that you may be having feelings for the guy sitting next to you, the guy who's been hellbent on irritating you ever since you met. Yet he was also the guy who never left your side. The weather outside seemed to have matched your mood, the grey clouds were out as the night fell and you were almost near the cabin.

The sight scared you as your eyes shut down, silently praying that it doesn't rain, but more importantly, no thunderstorms for you.

Heeseung seemed to have seen the sudden switch in your behaviour, him going mum, seeing you worried. He wordlessly held your hand, driving with the other one, you gulped, staring at your hands yet didn't make any move to push him away, the warm of his palm giving you the comfort you needed.

All you knew was you could trust him right now.

You kept your eyes shut for the rest of the journey, Heeseung's voice calming you down as much as it could. The soft jerk of car stopping made you aware that you had reached your destination, you got up fast, getting your backpack from the car and rushing to the big door of the wooden looking cabin.

Heeseung followed the suit, rushing to get the keys out from his jeans pocket, opening the lock to the cabin and rushing you to get in. He had two bags, one of which had a rolled up blanket, the only thing you had very conveniently forgot to keep with you.

The temperature had dropped drastically, the green big trees adding to it. A great day for you to wear a t-shirt. You sighed.

“How did you get the keys to the cabin?” you inquired.

“Oh–Jake gave them to me earlier.” he replied, going inside to see what the cabin was like.

Unlike what Jake had said, the cabin was fairly clean. You texted Karina, informing her that you've reached, safely at that, and asking when she'll be here. The cabin was big, alien scent of wood filling your senses as the whole furniture seemed to be wooden styled, the place also sporting a fireplace, which piqued the interest of Heeseung who had already begun to put logs in, trying to light the fire up to beat the cold.

The living room was huge and silent but also had a huge bed in place of what should be a sofa, only the voice of raindrops from outside was heard, alongside your quiet breathing and Heeseung's footsteps. On the wall was a huge bookshelf, full of books covered with a thin layer of dust, from Shakespeare to Jane Austen, all classics were lined up, put up in a systematic manner, yet no traces of the Supposed ghost were to be found.

“Woah.” Heeseung marvelled, making you look at him. He stood in the kitchen, the fridge opened as you walked towards him.

“It’s stocked?” you asked, confused. Your phone pinged just then, the connection was poor but enough to send texts.

RINA 💝 :

there's a thunderstorm outside, i don't think we'll be able to make it </3

YOU :

so im supposed to spend the night here alone with him? 💀

nvm im outta here

RINA 💝 :

come on, he's not bad and i know you like each other 😕

YOU :

,,,that's not true

RINA 💝 :

🤨

YOU :

im leaving.

You locked your phone, turning to look at Heeseung. “We should leave.”

“What, we just got here though?”

“Rest of them are not coming.” you informed, taking a step back, the air being cold enough to give you goosebumps.

You didn't wait for his reply, walking towards the door to escape this already, you wanted nothing more than the warmth of your blanket in your room.

Heeseung followed you, asking you to stop but, you went and opened the door only to see heavy rain pouring down, nothing else was visible outside. The sight made you cry, being stuck in a cabin in cold with a guy was not something you wished for.

He yanked you back in, preventing you from getting wet by the torrential downpour. You were shocked for a minute, just staring at the now closed door while he worked on the fire, trying to light it up as fast as he could to stop you from shivering.

You mood was sour as you waddled your way to the fireplace, sitting down on the carpet to absorb the warmth it radiated, Heeseung wandered at the back as you tried not to shiver, gulping down the nervousness you felt.

He kept glancing at you but, he found something amusing, an old gramophone player with tons of vinyls stocked in the shelf below it. Picking up one which he recognised, he put it on, trying to get it to work. It didn't at first but after a few positional changes, it worked. You snapped your head to see what caused the sweet melody to break out in the cabin, sighing seeing him standing there with a smirk.

It was a given, he always had that smirk on while teasing you and that's exactly what he was upto right now. Unfolding his blanket, he sat down in front of the fire, right next to you without sharing it. You sighed again, wrapping your arms around yourself, trying to get any kind of heat possible. That's when Heeseung spoke up again.

“What exactly did Karina say that made you run away, baby?” you looked at him as his eyes stared directly at you.

You weren't sure if it was the implication that made you flustered or the nickname, you remember what Karina said once, “Oh, he definitely likes you.” you brushed it off but, it suddenly made it a difference now that you were alone with him.

“Nothing that concerns you, Lee.”

He smiled, biting his lip.

“I think it does, baby. Just see how lucky you are to spend the whole night with me, alone.” he raised his brows, as if testing your patience.

You cursed under your breath, already hating the situation, how were you supposed handle his constant flirting the whole night?

“I'd rather be with anyone else but you.” you said, shifting closer to the fire that was big enough to provide you the warmth you needed.

“Tch, liar. Good girls don't lie, baby.” he smirked.

All you could see was how comfortable his blanket looked, it was enough to fit two people yet he had it hogged to himself, so much for liking you.

He saw your envious look and shivering body, tilting his head and asking, “You feel cold?”

“Well, yeah? I didn't exactly pack clothes according to this weather.” you let out, irritated about the fact that he still wasn't sharing his blanket.

Faint noises of thunder roared outside, audible even with the vinyl playing in the background. The sound making you clutch to yourself even tighter.

“Y'know fucking helps in creating body heat, right?”

He started again.

“Yeah? I'd rather freeze, no. Thank you.” you said, ignoring the uneasy feeling in your heart.

That's when a loud thunder was heard, making you scream and hide your face in your arms, sobbing at the one thing you've been scared of ever since you were a kid. You remember witnessing one of these as a child, seeing a big light flashing through the sky, roaring with the loudest sound you had ever come across. It left you traumatized, the small you cried for hours at that sight and the elder you does so too, just like what you were doing now.

Suddenly, you felt something wrapping around you, darkness surrounding your eyes as warm arms encased your shivering body, cradling you like a little baby. Heeseung had pulled the blanket up both your bodies, hugging you close to his frame, so much that you sat on his lap as his chin rested on top of your head as you freely sobbed on his chest. He knew how much you hated when it rained, it took him less than a second to react to it, embracing you as fast as he could.

You could hear his heartbeat. He gulped, thinking of ways to distract you, that's when he settled on one. Soon you heard a low hum which turned into soft vocals.

Heeseung was singing for you, from the very depth of his soul, his voice rose and swell, taking over the thunder's baritone as he sung 'butterfly' for you. Your frame stilled around him, processing everything that was happening around you, his larger rocked you back and forth, patting your head as if singing a lullaby to a baby. Only, the lyrics had a deeper meaning for you. Slowly, you wrapped his arms around him, your breathing going back to normal as his scent and voice invaded in your senses in all the right ways. You had never been this close to him before and you weren't sure if you ever wanted to let go.

He sang and clasped you tight enough to make you both seem like one person. You weren't sure if he held you for hours or for some minutes, all you knew was comfort—his arms were comfort.

He didn't let you go even when you tried to move back, calming down as the thunder stopped, only the heavy rain poured down. You tapped his shoulder twice.

“Heeseung?” your voice came out shaky.

Snapping his eyes open, he leaned back, his hands coming up to cup your face, searching for any kind of fear and hesitance, his thumb caressed your cheek on its own, him holding you so tenderly as if you would break if he lets go for even a second.

“Are you okay?” his voice trembled.

Getting a good look on his face, you realised how worried he looked. You were taken aback with his sudden show of affection yet you felt incredibly grateful for his existence here with you.

You nodded, keeping your own hands on his, looking away from his stare.

“Thank you.” you tried your best to smile at the bambi eyed boy in front of you and he merely nodded brushing it off.

You got off his lap, realising the position you were in. Your heartbeat rose again but for different reasons this time as you wrapped yourself in the blanket more. He coughed, trying not make the situation awkward.

The melodious tune of the vinyl still resonated the cabin as you both settled yourself in comfortable silence, aimlessly staring at the fire blazing in front of you. Lee Heeseung had been a sweetheart behind those pranks, it took everything in you to not smash your lips to his after he asked you if you were okay. Gulping down, you frowned thinking what his opinion on you would be. Does he like you like your friends say or is it just friendly concern he just offered?

Meanwhile, Heeseung was still careful around you, giving you side glances as he tried his best to figure out what thoughts your brain had been brewing.

Suddenly, the silence felt too loud to you, remembering all the times when Heeseung scared your crushes away, or when he ‘accidentally’ followed you to the same cafe you were going to, multiple times at that, or to the time when he punched the guy who tried to hit on you at the party. Was it all friendly or did he just hate you?

“Why do you hate me?” You asked before you could stop yourself.

“W–what?” he stuttered, not expecting this question to ever come out of your mouth. Hate? That's a heavy word and his heart physically pained to see the look in your eyes as you questioned him.

“Hm, you've always been adamant to tease me, to scare any human who'd take the least bit liking for me, getting me into trouble during classes, heck even my mom loves you enough to give you my favourite cookies.” the topic wasn't supposed to be this heavy yet you had tears in your eyes again.

“I could never hate you.” He spoke in a low register, yet his voice was firm and reassuring. You looked up at him, his perfect skin glowed golden with the fire he had set up in front of you both.

“That's the thing, y/n.” he started, smiling to himself before boring his eyes in yours, “How could I hate you when I'm in love with you?” he laughed at his pathetic state, waiting for you to laugh at him for doing so but he only got silence in the end, so he continued.

“I had liked you ever since I saw you in that little blue frock of yours, screaming at the others for saying how girls can wear blue too. You had always been so brave and I liked you as earnestly as a kid could at that age.”

You stayed mum, processing everything he was saying, your heart thumping rapidly against in your chest.

“Then we got a little older, I realised I shouldn't be feeling all of this so I ended up trying to chase you away, teasing being my last resort. It somehow stayed even as we grew older because that's was the only way you payed attention to me.”

Your lip quivered, eyes looking down at the carpet, not daring to face him.

“You grew up to be this talented young woman while I was and still am lost being the guy who's in love with you, knowing my feelings won't ever be reciprocated.”

He stopped, gulping his nervousness down for second. He had never been this confident about his feelings before and just the thought of rejection was enough to make him cry.

“I'm so sorry, I've been awful to you all this time–”

You pulled him down by his nape, locking your lips with his before he could say anything else. He didn't move back, neither did you.

The time probably stopped when it happened, neither of you moved your lips, it was meant to shut him up and you successfully did so, now moving back with a deep breath to look at him. He stared at you widened eyes, making you chuckle.

“You're an idiot, Lee Heeseung.”

You pulled him into a kiss again, this particular one was reciprocated by him, pulling you on his lap again as he moved his lips with yours, full of need and passion.

He'd dreamed of this for so long and the mere fact that you initiated the kiss was enough to drive him insane. It was all he wanted and more. His smile against your lips said it all, making you smile back as you tasted strawberry shake on his lips, the one he had while he went to get your meal.

You laughed, pressing your forehead against his, breathing the same air as him, his arms wrapped around your waist in a secure way.

His heart fluttered the amount it never did before, hearing your laugh, the one he caused, was hypnotic beyond reason.

“This feels different.” you whispered.

“A good difference, I hope.” he said, his lips brushing against yours as he spoke, sending tingles down your spine.

“Definitely.” you smiled, moving back to look at his glowing face.

You cupped his jaw, caressing his cheeks. His eyes never left your face, noticing each action of yours. Your traced his eyebrows, nose and lips with your fingertip, each feature of him screaming perfection. Heeseung was beautiful beyond words and even the dim lights couldn't disagree with that.

He picked you up, walking towards the big bed placed four steps away from you, his lips on yours again as he laid you down on the bed, getting on top of you, “Is this okay?” he asked.

You smiled at his demeanor change, highly wanting to tell him you've had more absurd thoughts about him than just kissing but, you just nodded.

He dived in to do so again, his tongue swiped along your lower lip which you gladly opened, giving him access to your mouth. His lips were warm and soft against yours, he slipped his tongue inside, breathing heavily with yours bodies pressed against one another.

You whined, your fingering carding in his hair, tugging at his soft locks, making him groan in your mouth. The smell of his perfume was intoxicating and the dire need he showed, his hands travelling around your body, trying to memorise each part of you. It all made you feel like you were the only two people in this world, no one else had made you feel this way before. Your senses never heightened to this point and it scared you because you had feelings for Heeseung.

Yet his smile made it vanish in a second, assuring you that it would all be worth it in the end. Soon, he was holding you like a baby holds his teddy bear to sleep, Heeseung was quite adorable with the clingy behaviour and, although it was new, you wanted to discover more of this side of him.

He had you wrapped in his arms, cuddling you while also laughing at the littlest movement of yours. The setting was ideal for you, his small back pats made you feel content, almost forgetting about the thunderstorm incident from a few minutes back.

Your laugh echoed again, you snuggling closer to him in the blanket, finding it adorable how he asked each time before kissing you, his ask count being five already.

“You don't have to ask before kissing me each time, Hee.” you smiled, pulling him in another kiss.

You had called him Hee, a name you never used before, a name that everyone called him but, it made

“Yeah? so I can kiss you whenever I wish to?” he asked as a challenge.

You hummed, saying yes to him, eliciting a spark in his eyes as he placed kisses all over your face, his hands gripping your ass to pull you closer, his knee separating your legs as he rested his between them, close to touching your core.

He kissed you again, way more passionate than the earlier ones, it made you weak in the knees, he was taking the control, squeezing your ass as you let out a moan.

He leaned back, kisses trailing down your neck, making you close your eyes and follow his rhythm, you gasped when he bit your neck with the least amount of force possible, the wetness pooling down your panties was embarassing since he hadn't even done anything more than kissing you.

“Heeseung!” you moaned softly.

“Hmm? yes, baby?” he asked, continuing to kiss and suck on your clavicle.

“Does the offer still stand?” you asked shamelessly.

Heeseung looked at you with a puzzled gaze.

“I'm still cold, y'know?” that's when it clicked, his offer to fuck you, for providing warmth of course.

His eyes widened by a fraction, seeing you being this bold was definitely a turn on for him. He wasted no time in throwing his black t-shirt away, revealing his perfect torso, faint abs visible in the dim lighting of the cabin.

“Is that what my princess wants me to do?”

You visibly shivered at the nickname, his breath hitting your neck as disappeared under the blanket, going down to unbutton your jeans, removing it and throwing it down the bed, his fingers were cold on your warm thighs.

The blanket was thrown to the side as you wanted to see each of his move, his hands roamed everywhere on your body, memorising each curve of your body as he placed open mouthed kisses on your neck, his hand tugging at the hem of your t-shirt as you got up for a second, removing the thin layer of clothing, leaving you only in your undergarments now.

Heeseung was infatuated, the sight in front of him made his heart swell, you looked breathtaking, just as he imagined you to be, or maybe even more. You held his hand, guiding it to your wet panties and he didn't had to be told twice.

He used two fingers, pushing your panties to the side to see your wet core. He smirked, proud of himself for making your body this reactive to him. It was your first time doing it with Heeseung yet it felt perfect, like it was meant to be the best with him.

“So pretty.” he commented, boosting your confidence whilst also making your heart race.

He gave it an experimental kiss, licking it right after, causing you to let out a breathy noise. He lift your legs, putting one on his shoulder as he pulled you closer for a better access.

The start was slow, romantic almost as he prepped feather light kisses on your inner thighs, soon shifting them to your dripping core, kissing it giving it teasing kitten licks, his nose brushing against your clit, making you arch your back and moan out his name.

“Hmmm, more!”

Your moans were his new favourite sound, he wanted to heard more of it, so he escalated things by a smidge. How could he ever deny his princess?

He sucked your clitoris, licking and inserting his tongue in your pussy right after, making your toes curl at the delight. His tongue easily slipped in your core, making you moan pathetically at his attempt of fucking you, lapping at your juices hungrily, wanting you to fall apart on his tongue.

You bucked your hips, trying to get more of him in any ways you could and his hands pinned your hips down, him being stronger than you. Your legs shook as he spoke, his voice deeper than usual.

“So fucking tasty, could eat you out for hours, hmm.”

He hummed against your heat, the sensation sending you in a spiral of bliss, your friends weren't lying when they said that Heeseung was good at everything. Clearly, he was.

“Fuck.” you groaned, feeling a familiar knot in your lower abdomen.

It didn't take you long to orgasm all over his tongue, him lapping it up like a hungry man. Your arousal covered his mouth as he got up, kissing your mouth again.

“Such a good girl for me.” He caressed your cheek, staring at you with heart eyes.

You were in euphoria, your toes curled and mouth slightly open to breathe in more, for, the man in front of you was sure to leave you breathless.

“Tell me what you want, beautiful?”

His face was right above yours as he supported himself on his arms, his little smile urging you continue with your wants.

“I want you.” a whisper left your mouth.

It was like you saw a flip switching in his eyes, it burned with passion as he removed his jeans and boxers in a go. You could only stare at his body in awe, him pumping his dick to hardened it just the right amount as you gulped, trying to calm the feeling in your abdomen.

Heeseung looked godly as he lined up his dick against your wet core, teasing your entrance with his now fully hardened dick.

“Beautiful.” he breathed out, making your heart flutter at his praises.

Your wetness made it easy for him to push in, staring at you throughout it, trying to memorise each of your expressions, each of your reactions.

“Fuck, I love you so much.” he moaned out before he could stop himself and you just arched your back, the feeling of his big dick in you made your pussy clench around him helplessly, your body molding with his perfectly.

He pumped himself in you, his gesture romantic yet intense. It made you think if you'd be in a relationship with him soon, the pretty boy on top of you thrusted harder by each second, you wanted more, you wanted to be with him.

“My pretty princess.” he called you, groaning and twitching inside of you.

Everything was overwhelming, both for him and you. Him having the girl of his dreams crying out his name whereas you realising that you've had feelings for the guy fucking you right now, all along.

That's when it got too much for you, screaming his name as you creamed his cock, just as he came inside you, your fingers digging in his back with the need to hold him closer than ever.

He breathed hard near your ear, his head on your shoulder now as he felt himself getting hard again with the kitten licks you gave on his neck, and this time he was sure to be more fueled than before.

“Fuck, y/n.”

He grabbed your hips, slamming into you without any warnings, giving you the heat you needed all along and suddenly, the room wasn't cold anymore, it was filled with heat—the heat provided by Lee Heeseung.

“You wanted me, right?” he groaned sinisterly, “Then you'll get all of me.”

He kissed you right after saying that, you moaned in his mouth, the faint music still playing in the background with the loud sounds of your skin slapping echoing in the room.

He grabbed your wrist, pinning it above your head. The way he handled you made you cry out of pleasure. Heeseung was perfect for you.

He thrusted and thrusted, “So wet, hmm.”

You cried yet again, the thumb rubbing your clit making you see the stars, your legs shaking with the overstimulating approach he used. His jaw clenched, knowing you were about to cum.

“Hold it.” he demanded.

“I–I can't!” you shook your head, your eyes teary as you were in the dire need of a release.

“Yes you can, princess.” your breasts bouncing each time he slammed his cock in you, the action making your eyes roll back and forcing shut.

“Just a little more, baby.” he groaned in your ear, his thumb never stopping and his thrusts getting sloppier by second, his own release close.

You cried, tears freely flowing down your cheeks as he kissed him away despite his rough demeanor.

“Cum for me, baby.” he whispered.

Your legs wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer till you couldn't anymore.

“My good girl.”

“Heeseung.” you moaned, reaching the highest point of your orgasm as he filled you up with his cum yet again.

The cum spilling out of your pussy now as his body collapsed on yours, pressing soft kisses all over your face, making you giggle like a kid.

“You were so good for me." he praised, rubbing his thumb on your cheek.

“You were so good to me.” you replied as he let out a proud smile before kissing you.

He wasted no time in getting his spare t-shirt to clean you up, you getting from him and cleaning him as well, a small smile gracing his lips at your affectionate gesture.

He made sure you drank water, him placing pecks all over your face, it made you feel loved beyond words. You laughed when he shared the cookies with you, the same ones your mom gave to him. He repeated her words, “We should share.” and he feeded you the same with his own hands, cooing at you making you hit his shoulder. Some things would never change.

He also made sure to wrap you in a blanket, wrapping his own arms around you to keep you warm throughout the night.

Sleep came easily to you, the day being tiring yet Heeseung couldn't sleep. He stared at your sleeping figure, memorising everything he could about you. With one last peck on your forehead, he pulled you close, making you rest your head on his torso as you both drifted off to the dreamland.

You woke up feeling a heavy weight on you, making you unable to move your body. Your eyes fluttered open, seeing none other than your pretty bambi eyed boy sleeping with his head on your chest, his mouth slightly open, his cheeks making him look like a small fluffball, the sight was endearing enough for you to click his pictures, making sure to not to wake him up but the voice of clicking stirred him awake.

His strong arms held on to you tighter, snuggling close to you as he muttered ‘5 minutes more’. You chuckled at his duality.

He was the same guy who fucked you senseless last night, the same guy who looked like a newborn child full of innocence now. You shook him up gently and it took him a solid of two minutes to open his eyes, finally processing that he wasn't in his room, hugging his pillow but, was in the cabin, sleeping with you.

You hadn't expected him to be so adorable, with his hair all messy and a goofy smile plastered on his face, he said a good morning to you, making you mirror his expression and say the same back to him.

“I love you.” he mumbled sheepishly while you pecked his forehead.

“I love you too, baby.”

His eyes opened wide as he leaned on his elbow, “You called me a baby?” he smiled teasingly, you rolled your eyes and smiled right after.

“I did.”

And the happiness on his face after was something you'd want to see for the rest of your life.

You both packed up, Heeseung making sure you don't go without kisses every two minutes, he seemed to have grown an interest for your lips, saying how they were perfectly kissable.

Laughing at the fact that there was no trace of any ghost, you finally reached home, deciding to meet everyone later in the evening yet Heeseung was wary of the fact that he had to let go even if it was for a few hours. He insisted on pecking you thrice, running back to do it again, not having it in him to leave.

You pushed him away, embarassed and still not used to the fact that he loves you, your push did nothing to move his stronger frame yet he left with a smirk saying, “You weren't pushing me away yesterday night, girlfriend.” and the wink to sum it up.

He called you his girlfriend. The mere implication made your cheeks heat up as you ran inside your home with a small smile ghosting your lips.

Jake opened the door for you and Heeseung, who happily offered to pick you up for the meet, the poor guy confused to see you together, it being a rare sight in general.

“How was your dance rehearsal?” you started the conversation.

He looked up, “It was normal, we could have had it today but Karina insisted on having it yesterday for some reason.” he casually explained.

“Wait, what?” your eyed widened, meeting that of Heeseung's.

It was obvious that their plan was to leave you stranded there, with Heeseung for the apparent ‘match making’ and you were low-key grateful for that. Your feelings were long due to be confessed and you had to thank them for it. But, on the other hand, you were cracking your knuckles.

“Oh, I'm so ready to kill them!”

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── .✦ found you (sjy)

pairing: non idol! jake x fem! reader

synopsis: jake is very well known and loved by everybody on campus. equally popular was his relationship with the captain of the volleyball team, haneul. even more popular, sadly, is his breakup after more than a year. the months following the event take a significant toll on jake, who becomes unrecognizable. his once sweet, friendly and pure nature is replaced by a constant gloomy and somber aura. what happens when this new version of jake sim unexpectedly clashes with a very straightforward and quite intimidating member of the school’s podcast?

genre: acquaintances to friends to lovers , college au , slowburn-ish , fluff , a bit of angst , healing , comfort - wc: 9.3k - warnings: swearing , mention of alcohol , violence (fighting) , cheating (not the main leads) , toxic relationship (not the main leads) , kissing , ft. enhypen (they are all the same age here) , lowercase intended ! , english is not my first language ! , this is a work of fiction and doesn’t reflect the idols in real life ! - author’s notes: i wanted to try and make something longer, i hope you’ll enjoy it as much as i enjoyed writing it! ++ i’m sorry but i absolutely am terrible at writing kissing/intimate scenes. i’m warning you in advance!

────

JAKE SIM IS KNOWN FOR BEING THE NICEST AND SWEETEST BOY ON CAMPUS.

jake sim is known for being one of the most handsome boys on campus.

jake sim is known for being part of the football team, but also for not being a jock, not even in the slightest.

jake sim is known for having dated the captain of the volleyball team, haneul, for more than a year.

but jake sim is mainly known for being cheated on by said girl.

ever since his messy breakup, nothing has been the same. he hasn’t been the same. he doesn’t even remember the last time he genuinely wanted to do something and didn’t have to be dragged out of his dorm room by his friends.

well, at least he still has them.

heeseung, jay and sunghoon are his childhood best friends, they literally grew up together and lived every experience together. even each other’s heartbreaks. they’re great guys, they’ve always been there for jake and he can’t ever complain about them, not even when they start being too insistent on his worst days. at the end of the day, they’re only trying to help. they don’t say it out loud, they never did, but they’re deeply concerned about their best friend.

the breakup took a pretty heavy toll on jake and they slowly had to witness their lively, sweet and considerate friend turn into a gloomy, unenthusiastic and weary guy. he would barely talk, nothing seemed to excite him, not even his biggest passions. that’s why he also quit the football team, even though he was probably the best player. he would spend all his free time locked in his room and he would leave the house exclusively to attend his lessons.

some people may think that this reaction is exaggerated, that he shouldn’t lose himself because of a girl, because of love. but nobody, except for his best friends, knows the real dynamics of the event. what people know and like to talk about in the hallways is that poor jake sim was cheated on by the smoking hot captain of the volleyball team. to be honest, many people used to question why they were even dating in the first place and weren’t surprised when the relationship ended the way it did. i mean, they certainly were a match visually, they are both amongst the most stunning students on campus. but their respective reputations are what made people question their relationship.

jake was known for being one of the best football players on the team, but the total opposite of your typical jock. the same couldn’t be said about haneul. it’s not that she was a player, she was just still stuck on his ex boyfriend, with whom she had always had a sort of an on and off situationship ever since their breakup. but after meeting jake, it looked like she was finally getting over her ex. she hadn’t met him again and she really seemed like she was seriously in love again.

but appearances can be deceiving. and jake was too blinded by love to notice haneul slowly slipping away from him and silently going back to her old habits.

────

“I’M SCREWED.”

you dramatically grumbled as you plopped down in the chair of one of the cafeteria’s tables, your friends already seated.

“what happened now?” jungwon asked, trying to sound concerned, but being betrayed by the amused glint in his cat-like eyes.

“did you make another freshman run away in fear?” teased sunoo.

“or did the principal admonish you again for what you said in the podcast?” suggested ni-ki.

“i really need new friends.” you muttered under your breath.

“okay, okay. sorry. tell us what’s wrong.” jungwon was quick to turn serious, the last thing he wanted was to annoy you even more.

“okay, so. you know yeji, right?” you started.

“the president of your podcast?” sunoo interjected.

“didn’t she leave for her exchange year in europe?” added ni-ki.

“exactly. well, as the substitute president of the podcast, i am in charge of pretty much everything now. and the biggest issue at the moment is to find a new speaker. i was supposed to do it during summer break, but i completely forgot. so now i’m screwed because i have the first meeting with the others in two days and i absolutely have to find someone by then.”

“okay, this could be a problem..” sunoo whispered, making you groan in desperation.

“okay, okay. we can fix this.” jungwon was quick to butt in. “first of all, do you have someone specific in mind? like, a certain kind of person that you think could fit for the role?”

“i mean, i really wanted to find someone really suited for it. but now, i think i’ll just have to settle for whoever i find. and i need to do it quickly.” you grumbled again, annoyed at yourself for having completely forgotten such an important task.

“i think you could still find someone good enough. you could maybe ask someone who knows a lot of people?” sunoo added.

“why don’t you ask heeseung? he’s popular and knows basically half of the students on campus.” suggested ni-ki.

“oh my god! you’re right!” you jumped up, quickly scanning the cafeteria in search of a very familiar face.

“found him! thank you so much, see you guys later.” and then you scurried to the other side of the room, where heeseung was sitting with his usual friends. park jongseong was the first one to see you and immediately knew that something was up.

“why is ___ literally dashing towards us?” he uncertainly asked.

“huh?” heeseung confusedly turned around in his seat and caught sight of your hurried figure. “oh, i think something’s wrong then.”

“yeah, she usually never approaches us.” sunghoon added.

“except for that one time she smacked heeseung across the head because he forgot to pick her up in the morning.” jay quietly snickered, earning a side eye from the boy in question.

“that appended once—“

but your distressed figure sliding in the seat next to jake’s immediately interrupted their playful banter.

“hee—“ you then stopped yourself and acknowledged the boys seated at the table. “oh, right. hi! sorry, guys. i’ll be super quick.”

“what did you do this time?” heeseung rolled his eyes, pretending to be annoyed, although everybody at the table perfectly knew he had a soft spot for you and always acted like your real brother.

“shut up! this is serious! i’m screwed, my reputation is at stake here! i’m going to fail and they’re going to tell her and she’ll personally come back from paris or london or whatever city she’s in just to look me dead in the eyes and tell me, ‘you are a fucking idiot’. i’m screwed, seung!” you dramatically started to ramble, heeseung and his best friends just weirdly staring at you, but with a hint of amusement in their eyes.

you, jay, jake and sunghoon could be considered acquaintances, you would briefly talk on sporadic occasions like that one. they also knew you because of the podcast and your reputation on campus. the two things were actually quite connected together. people would see you as this straightforward, strong, intimidating girl who wasn’t afraid to speak her mind. and not only during the school’s podcast.

“slow down, tiger. what the hell are you talking about?”

“so, you know that i’m the new president of the podcast until yeji comes back.. right?” you narrowed your eyes at him, to which he vigorously nodded his head.

“good. well, now we fall short of one speaker. and i might have been the one in charge of finding another one. during summer break. but i completely forgot. and now the meeting for the podcast is in two days and i absolutely have no one in mind!” you hopelessly banged your head on the table’s surface.

heeseung reached forward and softly patted your head, making you groan in frustration.

“don’t show affection, i’ll feel worse.” you swatted his hand away, making him scoff.

“why don’t you just ask someone random? like the first person you see in the hallway or in your class that looks even vaguely capable?” suggested jay.

“that’s exactly the last thing i want to do.” you deadpanned.

“yeah, that’s not going to work. she’s too much of a perfectionist to just settle for that.” your friend explained.

“i wanted to find someone who could fit for the task properly, i don’t want just anybody. but now i don’t have enough time and i really have to listen to jongseong’s terrible advice.”

the last part made his friends laugh amused, even jake cracked a little smile and it didn’t pass unnoticed by anybody at the table. not even you. of course you knew sim jaeyun. and of course you had heard the voices that circulated about him.

“jongseong? not even ‘jay’? wow, you must really hate me.” jay scoffed in disbelief.

“well, does it make any difference? we’re barely acquaintances anyways.” you reasoned.

“fair enough.” he mumbled, you were right after all.

“so, why are you telling us this?” heeseung butted in.

“because you know a lot of people. and maybe among these many people you know someone who can be a decent enough speaker?” you explained, slowly darting your eyes to each one of them with a hopeful and persuasive expression on your face.

“sorry, i only know figure skaters, but they won’t have free time to record it.” sunghoon was the first one to turn you down, followed by the others.

only jake still hadn’t answered you, so you slowly turned to him with an overexaggerated sweet smile on your face, making him grimace.

“ah, don’t look at me. i don’t know anyone who could help you.” he shook his head, making you groan in defeat.

“wait.. why don’t you do it?” your friend suddenly proposed, looking directly at the boy seated next to you.

“no way, man. are you crazy?” he immediately refused, pure terror written on his features.

“why not? you have a lot of free time now, trying something new could do you good.” jay tried to reason too, but the sim boy seemed hard to convince.

“that’s not a good idea—“

“don’t worry, i’ll manage to find someone. thanks anyways.” you sent them a quick and tight-lipped smile as you stood up. that was clearly turning into a personal conversation and you thought it felt wrong to listen to it.

as soon as you were out of earshot, the boys swiftly turned towards jake with pointed expressions.

“what?” he exclaimed, exasperated.

“i was serious, jake.” started jay. “why don’t you give it a shot?”

“and talk about what? seriously, i’m not in the right mental space to commit to something like that.”

“that’s exactly the reason why you should do it!” sunghoon exclaimed, almost fed up by his friend’s stubbornness.

“also, i think ___’s influence could do you good. i’m positive she would be able to really challenge you and maybe bring out something that’s stuck deep inside of you.” heeseung honestly added.

“something like what?” jake furrowed his eyebrows, not fully understanding what his friend was hinting at.

“passion, determination, purpose.”

“and maybe the old you.” whispered jay, but not low enough.

“the old me is dead. live with it.” jake suddenly snapped, standing up.

his friends let out heavy breaths as they silently watched him quickly maneuver his way out of the cafeteria.

on the opposite side of the room, you had sat down back with your friends and explained your failed attempt to the guys. by chance, you had looked around and caught the exact moment in which jake lost his temper and decided to flee from whatever conversation he was having with the others. you had never admitted it to anybody, not even yourself, but there was something about jake’s situation that made you unable to overlook it.

you weren’t one to meddle in other people’s business and you couldn’t stand gossip. but when it came to jake sim, something seemed to pull at your heartstrings every single time. maybe it was because you would see the pain and worry hidden behind heeseung’s eyes every time he would briefly mention him in a conversation. or maybe it was because, even if you didn’t personally know jake and had never had a proper conversation with him, you still had witnessed his radical change in personality, just like everyone else.

────

JAKE DIDN’T ATTEND ANY LESSONS FOR THE REST OF THE DAY.

his mind was too busy relentlessly replaying the conversation had during lunch break. he started pondering over that suggestion, thinking if he could really fit for the role and if it could really help him. it’s not that he didn’t want to change, to go back to his old ways, to feel alive again. it’s just that he was scared. in the past months, he had kind of found comfort in his pain and he had learnt to live in his own misery. thinking about change and going out of his comfort zone immediately caused the now all too familiar feeling of uneasiness to take control over him.

he was now quietly sitting on the bleachers of the football field, the place that held so many memories, the place where he had always felt fearless, invincible, free. where he had just always felt himself. it was still his safe space. as hard as it was to admit it, he regretted quitting the team every single day, but at the same time he still couldn’t find enough strength in himself to go back to it, to his biggest passion. so he would go there when he needed time alone to think or to simply relish the calmness of the usually not so quiet place while everyone else was having lessons.

suddenly, his eyes caught sight of a figure running laps in the football field, making him furrow his eyebrows. but his expression quickly morphed into one of surprise upon recognizing your face.

why were you running laps? were you skipping your lessons, too? were you perhaps trying to escape reality like he was doing?

your eyes met for a split second, in which he noticed a flash of recognition in your gaze, too. then you kept going and he kept sitting there, deep in his thoughts once again.

the next time you saw each other was that same evening, at the convenience store near the dorms. you were already patiently waiting for your turn at the cash register when he got in line right behind you. then you turned around and accidentally made eye contact with him.

“oh, hi.” you awkwardly greeted him.

“hello.” he greeted back, equally uncomfortable.

it was just a bit weird seeing each other for the third time that day, but not being close at all. especially because you would usually never cross paths, let alone multiple times in less than 24 hours. that was really unusual.

when it was finally your turn to pay, you discovered that you had stupidly forgotten your wallet at the dorm, and you started to mentally curs yourself for the embarrassment you were enduring. but before you could dig the deepest hole on the ground, right there in front of everyone, and disappear from the face of the earth, a sudden voice coming from your left brought you back to reality.

“it’s okay, add my stuff as well. i’ll pay for the both of us.” he told the cashier, swiftly standing right next to you to divide the items into two plastic bags.

“what? wait, you don’t have to—“ you tried to protest, but to no use.

“it’s really not a big deal, ___.” he quickly gazed at you and shrugged his shoulders unbothered while paying.

once outside, you kept thanking him and asking him how you could repay him, but he only kept dismissing all your attempts.

“i saw you today, at the field.” he decided to change the subject instead.

“yeah, i saw you too.” you replied a bit hesitantly, not sure why he was bringing that up.

“do you run often?”

“do you sit there often?” you fired back. he was clearly taken aback by that defensive answer.

“only when i need to be alone with my thoughts.” he honestly answered, surprising you.

“well, it’s the opposite for me. i try to run away from them.” you had no idea how you had ended up opening up to an almost stranger, it must have been the time, but nevertheless it almost felt right, the initial awkwardness now a distant memory.

“still worried for the podcast?” he asked, seeming genuinely interested.

“yeah.” you let out a heavy sight. “i can’t believe i forgot the most important thing.” you started rumbling mostly to yourself.

“what if i really joined it?” his mouth spoke quicker than his mind could process it, startling not only you, but himself as well.

“what? why? are you saying this just out of pity? weren’t you completely against the idea of it just this morning?” you furrowed your eyebrows, something seemed off to you.

“i don’t know, i was really thinking about it today. maybe my friends are right.” he shrugged. “you’re not convinced.” he stated right after seeing your doubtful expression.

“would you even be truly interested in it?” you pried further with a slight tone of skepticism.

“why not? could be fun. but i clearly see you don’t want me to do it.” he crossed his arms, almost as if he was trying to challenge you.

and he was starting to piss you off.

“change my mind then.” you mocked his gesture, raising an eyebrow without even trying to hide your growing annoyance.

“i regularly listen to the podcast. and i have a lot of free time since i’m not on the football team anymore.” he confidently replied.

“how long have you been listening to the podcast?” you fired back once again, it really was beginning to sound like an interrogation and he couldn’t help but feel amused by your seriousness.

you clearly weren’t playing.

but that specific question suddenly made jake remember a not so little detail, hence why you were able to notice a faint change in his expression, a glimpse of something deeper, painful maybe.

“since my.. uh.. ex-girlfriend introduced me to it. so for almost two years now.” at the mere mention of the girl, he quickly averted his gaze to the ground, feeling oddly exposed.

it’s like he could already hear all the whispered gossip about his breakup over and over again. and he couldn’t stand it anymore. for a moment there, he thought he was going to hear them again, but from you.

“that’s even more than me, i only joined this year.” you muttered, hating the idea that he might be right.

you didn’t even acknowledge the first part of the reply and you knew for a fact that he was grateful for that. sure, he was starting to get on your nerves with that challenging and almost mocking attitude, and you could have easily let out one of your harsh comebacks. at the end of the day, that’s what people knew you for. you were the girl with the sharp tongue, the one people should be wary of and careful not to get on her bad side. but you weren’t heartless and you had empathy, something that all those people clearly lacked, since they would easily talk about other people’s business like they were discussing the weather, even the most private and delicate matters.

“and since then you’ve always been my favorite, you know?” he added, a smug look on his face as soon as he realized he might be winning that improvised debate.

“are you trying to get into my good graces?” you scoffed, raising an eyebrow.

“what? no, i’m serious.” he immediately denied, looking almost offended. “i’ve always liked how straightforward you are and i admire the way you word things. like, it’s so clear and captivating, it always makes me want to listen so attentively to anything you say.”

since when was he so straightforward and honest?

“oh.” you murmured, trying to hide your flustered self, but it was all in vain, jake had already noticed it and thankfully decided not to comment on it.

“well..” you cleared your throat before continuing. “thank you, jake. it seems you have a good way with words, too.” you painfully let out.

he was so winning.

“so, did i change your mind?” he teased, slightly leaning in, waiting for an answer. you scoffed, rolling your eyes and poking a finger at his chest.

“maybe.” you lightly pushed him away. “i’ll let you know. and if i don’t, then it means i didn’t choose you. now, good night.”

you were already a few steps ahead, when his voice suddenly caused you to stop in your tracks.

“wait! you don’t have my number.” he pondered out loud.

“don’t need to. i’ll find you.”

those were the last words you spoke to him and the ones he somehow kept replaying in his head for the rest of the night.

────

YOU FOUND HIM AGAIN BY THE FOOTBALL FIELD A FEW DAYS LATER.

he was surprised to see you approaching him, to be honest, he had quickly given up on you, thinking you were just messing with him and wouldn’t really choose him.

well, he was wrong.

you sat yourself down next to him on the metal bench and looked at him straight in the eyes. that fierce eye contact made him shiver.

“congratulations, jake. you are officially part of the podcast.” you monotonously let him know.

“are you serious?” he widened his eyes.

“i’m not repeating myself.” you narrowed your eyes at him, making him scoff.

“well, thank you.” he genuinely smiled at you.

it was probably the first time in a long time seeing him smile like that again and your breath almost got stuck in your throat. he looked so different while doing so, he looked even better, more handsome.

wait, what the hell were you even saying?

“___? are you okay?” jake hesitantly waved a hand in front of your eyes, bringing you back to reality.

“oh.. yeah. uhm.. anyways.” you cleared your throat, flustered by the fact that you were staring at him while lost in your thoughts. “i need your schedule, so that i can adapt it with the ones of everyone else’s and make a plan for this year’s meetings and recordings.” you started explaining.

“sure. if you give me your number, i’ll send it to you. it’s easier that way.” he proposed.

you scoffed and narrowed your eyes at him.

“nice try. but as i’ve told you before, i’ll find you. just be ready with a copy of it.”

as you bid goodbye, and then throughout the rest of the day, you somehow couldn’t help but replay jake’s sweet and genuine smile over and over again.

he looked so warm, so like himself. his old self.

────

THE FIRST MEETING OF THE SCHOOL’S PODCAST HAD JUST ENDED.

you had introduced jake to all the members and explained to him all he needed to know. then you started to brainstorm a few ideas for some episodes and you had to admit, the ideas that he came up with were not so bad.

throughout the meeting, you found yourself paying a little extra attention to jake. you just wanted to make sure he wouldn’t feel too uncomfortable in the new environment. by observing him, you noticed how he was very serious and collected while attentively listening to everything that was being said. it almost looked like he was absorbing every single information. but you had no idea if he was enjoying it so far. that’s why you decided to stop him while everyone else was leaving.

“so, what do you think?”

“i like it so far, it seems very interesting.” he drily replied.

that was another thing you clearly noticed that day. he looked like he was avoiding you, which was weird, because you weren’t even friends. so that’s why you tried not to look too much into his behavior, assuming you were probably just overthinking and overanalyzing trivial details. but the answer he just gave you, with that cold tone and without even looking you in the eyes, made you instantly reconsider everything.

“good.” you nodded, stoically, matching his tone and energy.

“good.” he nodded back. “then i’m off. see you next time.” he murmured and left the room in no time.

“yeah.. see you.” you muttered to yourself.

the two of you didn’t speak again until the first day of recordings and the worst thing was that you had to sit next to each other and discuss different topics together. the moment you sat down, you could already sense the awkwardness seeping from the both of you. you couldn’t even look at each other, or better, jake couldn’t. of course the other members noticed the uncomfortable aura between you two and tried to ease the tension as best as they could. but jake simply looked like he wanted to be anywhere but there and you were getting more pissed off by the second.

“okay, uhm. i’ll turn on the camera on the count of three, the mics are already on, so let’s just start with ___’s intro and then jake’s small presentation. okay?” stated one of the guys.

unfortunately, since the first second, everybody in the room could sense and see with their own eyes how stiff you both looked. which was painful to watch. and you were well aware of it. jake looked bored and sounded monotonous, he was mumbling and just wasn’t saying anything relevant or slightly interesting. you tried to avoid it at first, pretending everything was going just fine. but that didn’t last for long and your patience ran thin in a very short amount of time.

“okay, that’s enough.” you suddenly snapped. “i’m sorry, guys. let’s take a five minute break, okay?” you sent them a tight lipped smile.

“jake, can we talk outside for a second?” you then coldly directed your attention at him, to which he merely nodded at you, but still followed you in the hallway.

“okay, listen up.” you pointed a finger at him, slowly getting closer and closer while he tried to step back. “i don’t know what your problem is and i don’t even care. the only thing i’m asking you is to get your shit together and act like a responsible person. you are the one who fucking volunteered for this, so act like you want to do it or just leave. you’re wasting all these people’s time, people who are just as busy with college and personal life as you are.”

you were so caught up in your anger that you didn’t notice you had now cornered him against the wall, while he was just embarrassingly staring at you. he was of course ashamed of his behavior, everything you told him was right, but he was especially flustered by your close proximity. the way you were so fiercely putting him into place, standing up for the work of the podcast’s members on behalf of their president, was just madly attractive. but he would never admit that out loud.

you too realized how close you two had gotten and swiftly took a step back while awkwardly coughing.

“seriously, i don’t know what’s going on with you. but if you’re going through a hard time, that’s not an excuse to act like this.” your voice softened a little, but your gaze remained sharp. “can i ask you something?” you then let out after a long sight.

he only nodded in reply.

“why did you decide to join?”

maybe it was your straightforwardness, or the way you softened when hinting at his possible personal problems. maybe it was the fact that even if you were mad, you still weren’t yelling at him, degrading him and making him feel like a walking soulless failure. maybe it was the fact that in that moment, he noticed something deeper in you that people normally wouldn’t see, because they would never get this close to you. maybe it was a combination of all these things that made his walls partially crumble.

“that day at lunch, after you left our table, the boys tried to convince me to join this. they think it could be good for me, that doing something new might help me. they want the old me back. hell, i want the old me back. but i don’t know how to do it. and i guess that your personality moved something in me, from the few times we spoke together. and that scared me, so i started acting like an asshole. i’m really sorry, ___. thank you for opening my eyes.”

you surely weren’t expecting all this honesty, that’s why it took you a moment to register everything he had said. but when you did, everything started to make more sense. you didn’t regret your angry approach, but you surely had discovered a new side of him. and you maybe were starting to reconsider him as a person.

“i understand.” you slowly nodded, but what he noticed was the almost subtle change in your eyes, a softer gaze now replacing the fierce one from before. “so, do you still want to give it a try?” you questioned with a hint of challenge in your voice, which made him slightly turn the corners of his mouth upwards.

“let’s do this.” he nodded determinedly and followed you back inside.

after deeply apologizing to everyone, jake sat down next to you again, a more relaxed expression on both of your faces. and so the first episode of the podcast was successfully recorded and that day, the both of you left campus with a new understanding of each other.

────

TIME REALLY DOES FLY SOMETIMES.

because a month had already passed and you and jake were skillfully recording episode after episode. that experience involuntarily brought you closer, making you two discover one another on a deeper level, until you ended up being friends. so now jake’s lunch table and yours became a single one, your respective friends getting along surprisingly well.

and so that’s why you were at sunghoon’s house, on a friday night, celebrating his and ni-ki’s birthdays. when the two guys found out they were born only one day from one another, they immediately planned to celebrate their birthdays together. and they kept their word.

you’ve never been a big party lover, that’s why, at one point in the night, you decided to take a break from the loud music, cheers and laughter and wandered off in search of a quieter place to stay at for a little while. however, your plan turned out to be harder than you had predicted, since sunghoon’s house was massive, and ended up standing in the back garden. but you weren’t alone. in front of you, standing by the pool, there was jake. he was speaking on the phone and by the looks of it, it really seemed like he was arguing with someone. since you didn’t want to eavesdrop and violate his privacy, you were going to turn around and leave him alone, but one particularly strained bit of the conversation caught your attention.

“leave me alone, haneul. it’s been almost a year and only now you decide to apologize and explain why you fucking cheated on me? why now, huh? why now when i’m finally happier? why now that i’m finally getting over you?”

his voice was loud, but incredibly weak and tired. arguing with her was the last thing that he expected to be doing that night and to be completely honest, he was fighting the urge to just hang up in her face. but deep down, he was well aware that a part of him would have still felt guilty. you took it as your queue to leave, it didn’t feel right with you to overhear such a personal conversation.

as your new quiet destination, you opted for the kitchen, which to your luck was completely empty. you grabbed a bottle of beer and sat on the counter, your feet dangling while you looked around. after only a couple of minutes, you saw jake’s figure approaching you, a small smile on his face as soon as you caught his eyes. but behind that apparent tranquillity, you were able to pick up the uneasiness from the recent phone call.

“found you! what are you doing here all alone?” he came to your side, propping his elbow on the counter, close to your exposed tight, and staring up at you. your breath got almost caught in your throat and you mentally cursed yourself for finding that simple gesture so attractive.

what was going with you lately?

“just needed a quieter place to recharge, you know?” you shrugged your shoulders, without breaking the eye contact.

“i saw you before, in the back garden.” he suddenly revealed, making you widen your eyes and turn a dark shade of red.

“don’t worry.” he quickly added with a light laugh. “you didn’t interrupt anything important.” he reassured you.

“i overheard just a little bit of your conversation, then i immediately left. i’m sorry.” you looked everywhere but at him, flustered.

“don’t apologize.” he murmured. he then delicately brought his hand up to your chin, in order to make your head turn to look at him. you just stopped there for a little while, simply admiring one another, almost as if you were trying to memorize as many details of each other’s features as possible.

“are you okay?” you eventually found the courage to whisper, pure concern etched on your face.

and that incredibly warmed jake’s heart. seeing you caring for him and asking how he was doing made his heart beat way faster than it was supposed to. it wasn’t often that someone would stop and ask him if he was doing okay. most of the time, even his family and friends would just look at him sympathetically and avoid the topic as much as possible, knowing he wouldn’t answer them even if they tried. but with you, it was completely different. there was something about you that made him question everything. that was your power. your fierceness, your way of thinking and formulating your thoughts, your challenging nature. all these things pushed him, threw him off guard at times and made him look up to you. and also look forward to the podcast’s recordings.

he still remembers his friends’ words that day during lunch: “i think ___’s influence could do you good. i’m positive she would be able to really challenge you and maybe bring out something that’s stuck deep inside of you. passion, determination, purpose.” heeseung had said. “and maybe the old you.” jay had also added.

the old him. to be honest, it would be impossible to go back to the old him, because that would imply going back to his old life. however, he was starting to embrace a new version of himself, a version that combined his old traits and his new ones. the essence of who he was was slowly coming back, but it was accompanied by the hurt he was still healing from.

“jake? are you there?” you waved a hand in front of his face, bringing him back from his thoughts.

“sorry, got lost in my head for a moment.” he sheepishly smiled up at you.

“what were you thinking so intensely about?” you softly giggled.

oh, what an angelic sound. he truly could listen to it nonstop for the rest of his life.

“do you think i’m on the right path to finding myself again?” he honestly asked, making you smile fondly.

“well, would you have asked anyone this question a few months ago?” you asked back.

“i see your point.” he nodded happily. “then, i have to thank you.” he stated seriously.

“me? why?” you furrowed your eyebrows, that was new.

“thanks to you i feel like i have a purpose again and like i’m actually doing something useful, productive. i’m not just existing and letting the days go by while i’m stuck in my head with my bad memories. i finally have something to look forward to. and someone.”

you were speechless, to say the least. a whirlwind of emotions was making its way inside you, leaving you almost out of breath. seeing him being so vulnerable in front of your eyes, thanking you for something so important, something that you didn’t even realize you were doing, it was just a lot to comprehend.

“yun, i don’t even know what to say.” you breathlessly let out. “i didn’t even know i was helping you this much, but i’m glad i unconsciously did. you deserve to be happy again.” you genuinely smiled, every word coming out of your mouth enhancing his sudden desire to just smash his lips on yours.

you tentatively reach for his face, brushing a loose strand of his hair out of his eyes and then cupping his cheek to softly brush your thumb on his soft skin. jake’s complexion turned a faint pink, but he didn’t care. not if it was in front of you.

“yun?” he softly smiled, his heart beating rapidly upon hearing the new nickname.

“oh, i’m sorry—“

“no.” he shook his head. “i love it.”

“i’m glad you found me.” he added right after, closing his eyes to bask in the softness of your touch.

“and i’m glad i found you.”

────

BEING AWOKEN BY YOUR PHONE BUZZING AT TWO IN THE MORNING HADN’T CLEARLY BEEN ON YOUR AGENDA.

looking at the display, you read sunghoon’s name and confusedly furrowed your eyebrows. why was he calling you in the middle of the night?

“sunghoon? what’s wrong?” you groggily answered the phone.

“hi, ___. i’m so sorry to call you at this hour, but there’s a kind of.. situation.” you could sense the nervousness in his tone and you could also hear muffled sounds and hushed voices in the background.

“did something happen?”

“yeah.. uhm, it’s jake.” at the mention of the boy’s name, your heart skipped a beat. “we are at a party and jake might have drunk a little too much after he talked— no, i should let him explain it to you. the point is, he fought a random guy and now that he’s more sober, he’s kinda.. struggling?”

you were so confused, especially because he wasn’t talking directly and was clearly hiding something from you.

“hoon, i hate when you talk in circles. is he hurt? are you trying to ask me to come to you?” you went straight to the point, making the guy let out a breath of relief.

“yes, please. he’s not that hurt, just a few scratches. it’s just that.. he’s very emotional at the moment and we don’t really know what to do. nothing seems to help.” he admitted.

“and why do you think i could help instead?” you raised a brow.

“because it’s you.”

“ass-kisser.” you playfully scoffed. “text me the address, i’ll be there as soon as i can.”

entering what you assumed was a frat boy’s house with a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie surely caught people’s attention.

thankfully, you didn’t have to look around the massive house in search of any of your friends, because heeseung and jay were already approaching you.

“thank you so much for coming, ___-ie. we really don’t know what to do.” heeseung sounded almost desperate.

“what even happened?” you asked, confusion and concern etched onto your features.

“haneul approached him as soon as he arrived here. they badly argued and then he just started drinking nonstop. after a mere hour, he was already shitfaced and picked up a fight with a random dude who just accidentally knocked into him. but don’t worry, it was just a couple punches and it was all over.” he started to explain. “and now that the effect of the alcohol is almost completely gone, he’s just elaborating on everything that happened, mainly the conversation with haneul i assume, and he’s been crying and on edge for the past hour. we don’t know how to calm him down.” finished jay.

they led you upstairs and into one of the guest rooms. and there he was, sitting at the edge of the bed with his fingers almost painfully tugging at his hair. he was mumbling incoherent words as sunghoon was standing in front of him, trying to reassure him. as soon as your steps became audible, both of their gazes snapped in your direction, making you almost jump. at the sight of your small, reassuring smile, jake’s eyes automatically welled up with tears.

“why did you call her?” he let out in a broken sob, covering his face shamefully.

“thanks for coming, ___. we’ll be outside in the hallway if you need us.” sunghoon swiftly approached you, not before giving jake an affectionate pat on the shoulder. you nodded and slowly approached the broken guy, sitting close next to him.

“jake, it’s okay. don’t hide from me, i’m never going to judge you.” you softly called out, resting a hand on his back and slowly patting it in circles.

“i’m sorry you have to see me like this. and i’m sorry you had to come here in the middle of the night. were you sleeping?” he mumbled in his hands.

“nothing to be sorry about, of course i would come for you.” you softly smiled, your words finally making him look up at you. seeing his red and puffy eyes clench your heart, you couldn’t stand the idea of him suffering. you subconsciously reached for his face, drying his tears with your thumb and making jake flustered. you only smiled endearingly at his rosy cheeks.

“are you hurt?” you then asked, delicately angling his face more towards you to look for any possible wounds. you took his hands next to do the same and let out a sight of relief when you didn’t find anything. but when you were about to loosen the grip on his hand, jake tightened it and began to softly caress your knuckles with his thumb. you properly looked at him, at his features, at the pain and sorrow hidden behind his expression, but that somehow you were always able to effortlessly notice it.

“do you want to talk about it?” you whispered, afraid you were maybe crossing a line, or moving too fast.

realization hit him, they had told you. he heavily sighted, but decided it was time to finally open up and tell you the whole story from the beginning. he trusted you, he deeply cared for you, he considered you important. there weren’t any more reasons to keep denying it to himself.

“i’ll have to start from the very beginning, though.” he murmured, squeezing your hand as if to seek comfort.

“and i’m here to listen to everything you want to confide in me.” you squeezed his hand back.

and so he did.

he told you how him and haneul met and got together, he explained the toxic situation between her and her ex-boyfriend and he painfully described how he caught the two making out in an empty hallway on campus. he then delved into the details of his former relationship, describing how it wasn’t as perfect as it looked from the outside. he opened up about haneul’s toxic behavior, how she would love bomb him when she was in a good mood, and then yell the worst and most degrading things at him when she wouldn’t feel well. she also often compared him to her ex, or to any other popular guy.

“i was so exhausted. i knew it was toxic and i knew i had to leave her. but i just couldn’t. i mean, i was in love with her, we dated for more than a year and she started acting like that only in the last few months, when she started to go back to her ex. every time she would hurt me, i would tell myself that it was going to be the last time, that i was finally breaking up with her. but then i would recall all of our good memories, all the times she had been a good girlfriend. plus, she would apologize every time and, i don’t know, she sounded so genuine, like her old self. i couldn’t find it in me to break it off. i feel so stupid, i should have been stronger—“

“don’t ever say it again. it’s not your fault.” you immediately cut him off, maybe a bit too harshly, making him look down on the floor. “no, hey, look at me.” you quickly softened your tone. “i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to sound mean. i just can’t stand seeing you like this and on top of it all, blaming yourself for something that someone else did to you. please, believe me when i tell you that it’s not your fault.”

you didn’t even realize you had started crying until you felt jake’s thumb softly caress your cheeks and dry your tears, just like you had previously done to him. but then, he let his desire and amplified emotions get the best of him, and he found himself slowly inching closer and closer to your face, his gaze dangerously dropping down to your lips. he couldn’t do it anymore, he couldn’t stand the tension between the two of you anymore. he was far gone, completely whipped for you. in his eyes, you were just perfect, you always knew what to say, you could understand him perfectly and you truly, genuinely cared about him. whether it was through words or gestures, you had let him know how important you considered him, probably even without fully realizing it.

your breath itched upon realizing what he was trying to do. you would be lying if you stated that you didn’t want to kiss him. your feelings weren’t completely clear to you yet, but you couldn’t deny the tension between you two anymore. however, on the other hand, your common sense also butted in. was it the right time to kiss each other? when he was so vulnerable and still upset? you didn’t want to take advantage of him and risk him regretting it later on.

“yun, i don’t think right now it’s the right time.” you found the strength to whisper, your hot breath fanning over his lips.

“are you rejecting me?” he murmured, resting his forehead on yours and closing his eyes, afraid of the possible answer.

“no.. i just don’t want to take advantage of your vulnerable state. you’re not thinking completely straight and you’re still shaken up by everything that happened.” you tenderly explained, cupping his cheek with one hand.

“but, will we talk about this?” he hopefully questioned, opening his puppy eyes again and almost melting you on the spot.

“of course, whenever you want. just, not right now. okay?” you smiled, making him vigorously nod.

“thank you, you found me this time too.” he whispered.

“i’ll always find you, yun.”

────

EXAMS WERE APPROACHING.

you could sense it from the extreme nervousness running through your whole body. you, jungwon and heeseung decided to meet up at a café to try and get more work done, but you knew your plans wouldn’t last long as soon as you saw the two guys looking knowingly at each other and then directly at you. you huffed an annoyed breath, mimicking crossing your arms.

“spit it out.” you impatiently demanded, causing a wide, sly smile to form on their lips.

“what’s the deal with jake?” heeseung went straight to the point.

“there’s no deal. we’re friends, you know that.” you scoffed.

“close friends.” jungwon suggestively raised his eyebrows.

“just say whatever bullshit you two have in mind.” you huffed once again, making him pout.

“it’s not bullshit! we’re serious, he told us what happened that night. why haven’t you discussed it yet?” he pried.

“i don’t think that would be a good idea.” you avoided their eyes, looking down on your notes.

“why do you say that?” heeseung softly asked.

“you know why.”

“he’s over her, you know it too.” jungwon pointed out.

“yeah, but he still hasn’t completely healed, yet. and he trusts me, he completely opened up to me. hell, he told me everything, every little detail. i can’t find it in myself to disrupt his newfound balance, even if he feels the same way about me.”

“i think you should go for it anyway. trust me, you won’t ruin anything. on the contrary, you’ll only do him good.”

“huh? what are you trying to say?” you furrowed your forehead, feigning cluelessness, when in reality you had probably a vague idea of what they were referring to.

heeseung knew that and rolled his eyes at you, but decided to still please you and tell you directly. “we shouldn’t tell you this, but he keeps talking about you and about what happened that night. he nonstop keeps sulking because you still haven’t talked it out and he badly wants to, but he’s afraid you’ll reject him and he prefers to wait for you to give him the okay to talk. but he’s ready, ___. he’s been ready for quite a while now. so piss off and go talk to him.” he sternly commanded.

“what? now? that’s a bit—“

well, they managed to convince you. and now there you were, seated at the bleachers by the football court, watching jake train with his former team. when you texted jake to meet up, the last thing you expected to read was the text he sent you: “i’m about to start practice, but you can come and watch me. we’ll talk afterwards.”

since when was he on the football team again? why didn’t he tell you? was he going to quit the podcast?

so many questions started to invade your mind, typical of you and your overthinking. and you were so deep in your concerns that you didn’t even notice jake approaching you, already showered and changed.

“hey, there! what got you so deep in your thoughts?” he softly giggled, making your heart melt for a short instant. but then you remembered the whole reason why you were so out of it in the first place.

“are you back in the team?” was the first thing you asked.

“kind of. since coach is still very pissed at me for leaving in the first place, he’s making me practice again, but i won’t be able to actually play and be officially back until next season.” he calmly explained.

“wow, i didn’t know you were considering it. wait, but does that mean you’re going to quit the podcast? i mean, you’ll be busier and you have to also think about your exams. i don’t want to burden you with the podcast, so if you feel like quitting, then i’m going to respect-“ you nervously started to rumble, agitating your hands in the air for more emphasis.

in that moment, jake found you incredibly adorable, and the urge to shut you up with a kiss became almost unbearable.

“hey, hey! slow down, tiger!” he genuinely laughed, ruffling your hair and sitting right next to you. “i’m not quitting, don’t worry. i still have enough time to do everything, don’t worry.”

“are you sure? i swear, i’m not going to be upset if you want to quit.” you insisted, concern etched onto your features.

“i’m 100% sure. now, what did you want to talk about?” he curiously asked, unconsciously leaning over towards you.

“uhm.. well—shit, how can i say it..” you started to nervously ramble to yourself, making jake suspiciously raise an eyebrow.

“what got you so stressed out you can’t even say it out loud? it’s unlike you to struggle being straightforward.” he pointed out, a knowing smirk fighting to form on his face; he knew what you were most definitely trying to confess.

but he was right. you were known for never being afraid to say what you truly thought, so were you really going to let emotions get in the way of your usual confidence?

of course not.

“you know, you’re right. i’m going to be straightforward, like always. but.. promise not to run away!” you quickly pleaded, softly clutching his arm.

at the sudden touch, jake felt a jolt of electricity go through him and had to try his best not to let it shine through.

“i promise, ___-ie.”

you took a deep breath, looked at him straight in the eyes and finally let out the words that you were dreading so much.

“jake, i have feelings for you. please, don’t run away.” you immediately let go of his arm and cast your gaze to the floor, too flustered and scared to keep eye contact.

on the other hand, jake was grinning like an idiot.

“and why do you think i would run away?”

“because you’re feeling so much better and you finally found a balance in your life and i don’t want my feelings to scare you away or make you uncomfortable. i mean, i know we were about to kiss and everything, but you weren’t in the right state of mind. so i started overthinking, like always, and convinced myself that you had regretted it or you didn’t feel ready. but then today i was studying with heeseung and jungwon and they convinced me to talk to you—“ “___” “and they were like hinting at you reciprocating my feelings and wanting to talk about it, but honestly, i’m still hesitant—“ “___, hey!” “i don’t want to ruin thing between us and i don’t want to rush you into anything. i mean, i know you’re finally healing and feeling so much better, i don’t want to cause any damage—“

not finding any other way to make you stop cutely rambling, he opted for the thing he’s been dreading the most in the past few weeks: he smashed his lips on yours, finally being able to shut you up. the kiss was slow, sweet and a bit uncertain. it was filled with unspoken feelings, deep understanding and affection.

“you weren’t kidding when you said you tend to heavily ramble when you get nervous.” he was the first to break the silence, teasingly smirking at you. “but i love it.”

“yeah?” you breathlessly let out, looking at him still in a daze. you were still trying to process everything.

“yeah.” he happily giggled, planting a quick kiss on your cheek, only making you more flustered. “___, i like you so, so, so much. you’re the best thing that ever happened to me, i’m dead serious. you literally saved me and i’ll forever be grateful for it. but i feel ready, you don’t have to worry about anything. you’ve taken care of me for all these months, now i feel like it’s time i reciprocate it and start taking care of you. but as your boyfriend, if you’ll let me.”

“are you asking me out, sim?” you teased.

“only if you say yes.”

and then he suddenly retrieved two tickets from his pocket, but they weren’t simple tickets. they were concert tickets for your favorite artist.

“jake! you didn’t!” you gasped, looking repeatedly at him and the tickets in his hands with wide eyes.

“i did.” he vigorously nodded. “i remember you talking about it in one of our first podcast’s episodes. i actually bought them a few weeks ago, i was planning to confess my feelings and ask you out, but i couldn’t find the right moment and then you anticipated me.” he sheepishly scratched the back of his head.

“you are absolutely crazy, yun. thank you so much.” you quickly pulled him into a bone-crushing embrace.

“i’ll take it as a yes, then?” he giggled in your ear.

“of course, yun!”

“i’m glad we found each other, i wouldn’t imagine all of this with anybody else.” he softly whispered, caressing your head with one hand.

“me too. i’ll always find you, yun. that’s a promise.”

────

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nightmares | s.j

in which you have a nightmare and seek comfort from your roommate.

pairing: jake x fem!reader

includes: nipple play, pussy eating, sleepy sex, unprotected sex (lmk if i missed anything).

it was childish, you knew: to be so afraid of a dumb nightmare that you had to go to your roommate for comfort.

but there you were, absolutely petrified. you laid flat on your back in your bed, not moving a muscle because you were so afraid. it didn’t help that it was storming outside either, the occasional cracks of thunder and lightning making you shiver.

when you checked the time on your phone, it read 2:19 a.m.

you briefly wondered if your roommate, jake, would be awake. it was dumb to even consider it because you knew he cherished his sleep, so he would definitely be passed out with it being that late.

even though you knew that, you still needed to be around another person. you were way too afraid to be by yourself right then.

you took a deep breath and pulled yourself out of bed. you leapt through your dark room and opened the door into the hallway. jake’s room was just across from yours.

his door was closed. you pressed your ear against it but couldn’t hear a thing. you were slightly frustrated that he was asleep, but it wasn’t like it was his job to stay awake for you just in case you had a nightmare.

slowly, you twisted open the door. his room was completely dark, but a flash of lightning illuminated his sleeping form for just a second. as you suspected, he was completely knocked out, buried under the covers in his bed.

you took a hesitant step inside, not entirely sure what you were doing by going into his room. you just needed company and the reassurance that your nightmare wasn’t real.

the door came to a close behind you, the sound of it shutting a little louder than you would’ve liked.

jake stirred, sitting up ever so slightly.

“y/n?” he mumbled, eyes squinted to look at you in the darkness.

“sorry i woke you,” you apologized, awkwardly standing by the end of his bed.

“what are you doing?” he asked. “what’s wrong?”

“i just…i had a nightmare,” you told him.

saying it out loud, you were embarrassed. you’d woken your roommate up like a child. you were selfish too for doing that. he worked hard and he was tired, thus he needed a full night of sleep.

“nightmare?” jake questioned.

“yeah,” you said. “i know, it’s dumb. i was just scared.”

“c’mere.”

your body filled with warmth and relief at the soft word from jake. he wasn’t mad, he was actually inviting you into his bed to provide you with the comfort you so desperately needed.

you crawled into his bed and slid under the covers with him. his bed was so warm and you immediately felt about a million times safer just being near him.

you laid on your side and he slid his arm around your waist, pressing his front side to your back.

you’d been roommates with jake for about a year, but you’d never once cuddled. you were friends—good friends, but you barely ever even touched. you never really hugged each other, never held hands, and especially never spooned in his bed before.

“d’you wanna talk about it?” he asked, his breath warm against your ear.

“no,” you said, not wanting to have to relive the awful nightmare. “i just couldn’t be alone.”

jake inhaled and all he could smell was the intoxicating scent of your shampoo. you were so warm and delicate in his embrace, he was definitely freaking out but trying his best not to show it.

“i’m here now,” he said. “nothing is gonna get you if i’m here.”

his words, for whatever reason, made your heart pound, made butterflies flutter in your tummy. to hear those sentences come from your incredibly attractive roommate made you…excited.

sunghoon was the reason you two knew each other. you were friends with sunghoon, jake was friends with sunghoon, and you all started hanging out in groups. you and jake coincidentally needed roommates at the same time, and then there you were.

you’d always thought he was hot and not only his physical appearance, but his personality too. he was sweet and caring and gentle, and you just really, really enjoyed him. his cute accent was a plus too.

“thank you,” you exhaled. “i knew you were sleeping and i really didn’t wanna wake you. i just—”

“hey, it’s okay,” he assured.

you suddenly felt the soft tingling sensation of his fingers grazing up and down your t-shirt clad back. you sighed in pleasure, letting your eyes flutter shut.

“feels so good,” you told him, your voice in a mumbled daze.

“yeah?” he replied. “want me to keep going?”

“mmm, yes please,” you hummed tiredly.

jake cooed at your sleepy state and continued running the tips of his fingertips up and down the length of your back.

he continued to do that until you were slowly lulled into a soft doze.

after a few minutes, jake spoke.

“can i lift your shirt?” he asked.

your eyes flew open, startled by his sudden voice in what was such a quiet room.

“yeah,” you told him.

he slowly pushed your t-shirt up your body, revealing your smooth back. he left your shirt bunched up around your chest and reattached his fingers to your back, using his nails to glide up and down.

you leaned back into his touch, sighing in pleasure. jake’s breathing got ever so slightly heavier by the sight of your pleasured reactions and your pliant body against his.

he eventually switched to using the palm of his hand to rub your back soothingly. he rubbed along your back before his hand started inching to your side, and he rubbed there too.

he gently pulled you down so you were laying on your back. with him still laying on his side, he had a height advantage over you. he looked down at your tired face, licking his lips.

neither of you even said anything and mutually started leaning in at the same time. the moment was already intimate from him rubbing your back, it just felt right and normal to kiss.

his warm lips were heavy against yours, kissing you slowly and deeply. his hand came up to cradle your face, caressing your warm blushing cheek with his thumb.

“you’re so pretty,” he mumbled against your lips.

if you were any more awake, you probably would’ve been squealing and jumping up and down.

he trailed his hand down from your face and to the side of your waist. your shirt was still raised slightly, revealing a sliver of your stomach.

jake pushed your shirt up and stopped just below your breasts.

“can i keep going?” he asked, pulling back and looking into your eyes.

you were so excited about where things were going, you would’ve been an idiot to say no.

“yeah,” you answered, grabbing the back of his neck and pulling him back down to your lips.

he smiled against your lips and inched his tongue inside your mouth. you responded immediately, rubbing the slippery tip of your tongue against his. the sound was purely lewd, all wet and kissing noises.

he pushed your shirt up until it was over your chest, revealing your tits to him for the first time. the cool air in the room immediately hardened your nipples.

jake cupped your breast in his hand and swiped his thumb over your nipple, making you gasp and arch into his touch. he pulled away from your lips for a second to wet the tip of his pointer finger. he then brought his finger down to your nipple and rubbed it in little circles.

you moaned against his lips, jutting your hips up because you were suddenly a lot more needy that you’d realized. with the way he was playing with your nipple, it was starting to get you worked up.

he departed from your lips, trailing kisses down your chin, your neck, your collarbones, and finally to your chest.

he circled his tongue around the bud before taking your nipple into his mouth and sucking on it gently. you moaned out, entangling your fingers in his thick hair.

he played with the other neglected nipple, massaging it between his thumb and index finger. you spread your legs and tugged on his hair softly, showing to him how good it felt.

“you like that, baby?” he asked, licking your nipple in circles again. “is it makin’ you feel better?”

“fuck,” you moaned. “yeah, i love it.”

“cute,” he chuckled, switching to suck on the other nipple.

you weren’t sure how long that went on for. you just knew it was long enough for your panties to be completely soaked by the time he pulled away.

he kissed down your bare stomach and stopped where the waistband of your sweatpants were.

“can i keep making you feel good, baby?” he asked, his hand coming to wrap around your thigh.

you needed him to make you feel good. your pussy was so sensitive from being so aroused and you just needed something.

“mmm, please,” you answered. “it’s sticky.”

“it’s sticky?” he repeated, peeling your sweatpants down your legs. “let me see.”

he spread your legs and found that your flimsy pair of panties were completely soaked through from your arousal. he gulped, bringing his finger up and dragging it down your clothed slit.

you whimpered, jutting your hips up to try and get more contact out of just his one finger. he pushed your hips down.

“poor thing,” he cooed. “you’re soaked. did you like getting your nipples sucked that much?”

“yeah,” you answered pathetically, embarrassed.

“sweet girl,” he said, pouting at you. “gonna take care of you, angel.”

your pussy clenched around nothing.

he was quick to hook his fingers into your panties and slide them down your legs, tossing them onto the floor with your sweatpants. you were bare in front of him then, your cunt dripping and eager.

he spread your legs as wide as they could go. you felt so vulnerable underneath him. you’d never even hugged the guy, yet now you were there with your glistening cunt twitching in front of his face.

he held your thighs as he leaned in and look a long lick from the bottom of your sopping pussy all the way up to your puffy clit. he moaned as the taste of you infiltrated his senses, taking over his head. he knew just from that one lick alone that he was addicted.

“oh my god…” you trailed off, your hand finding his hair again to hold on to.

he started flicking his tongue up and down your folds, pushing his face into your cunt as deep as he could. he wrapped his lips around your clit, making out with it and drooling all over it.

for a moment, he pulled back to just look at your pussy. spread your lips with his thumbs, watching your drooling hole convulse.

“fuck, baby,” he nearly growled.

he couldn’t stay away for long and his face was buried back into your pussy a second later. he swiped his tongue back and forth against your clit, his eyes fluttering closed at the taste and the feeling of it.

“mmm,” he hummed into your pussy. “so sweet, baby. tastes so good. could’ve been eating you out since the day we moved in together if i knew you were this sweet.”

you could barely process any of his words, so lost in the pleasure he was giving you. his tongue worked your pussy like magic, slurping up your arousal and nibbling on your clit and thrusting in and out of your leaking hole.

“jake,” you cried out, tugging on his hair. “‘m close, fuck. i’m so close.”

jake dug his fingers into your thighs, frowning slightly in concentration. his tongue continued to move rapidly on your hot, gushing cunt.

the knot in your stomach suddenly snapped and your entire body fell weak. your eyes rolled back into your head and you fucked your hips against his tongue to ride out your orgasm. he moaned against you as the taste of your cum dripped down his throat.

he left your pussy with a kiss before sitting up on his knees. staring down at you, so sleepy and fucked out, he wanted nothing more than to stuff his cock deep inside of you and just pound until you both went dumb.

jake rubbed your thigh, watching your eyelids grow heavier and heavier.

“can i fuck you, baby?” he asked, slightly nervous about what you’d say.

you were tired, clearly. he wasn’t sure if you’d want to.

“yeah, jakey,” you said sweetly.

his heart throbbed at the nickname, and the fact that you were going to let him fuck you. the idea of what your tight cunt would feel like wrapped around his cock made him lightheaded.

he was quick to rid himself of his clothes. he was hard from eating you out and only needed to jerk himself off for a second before he was ready to put it in.

he lined the pretty pink tip of his cock up with your slippery hole and eased his way inside, not wanting to hurt you. he watched your reactions closely.

you looked up at him, your jaw falling slack at the feeling of his cock slowly filling your pussy up. your legs shook as he pushed himself to the brim, the tip of his cock hitting the spongey spot deep inside of you.

“oh,” you whimpered. “feels so good. i’m so full.”

“yeah, baby?” he cooed. “you nice and full of my cock?”

you nodded rapidly, sitting yourself up slightly so you could see his cock slowly slide out of you before pushing back in. your walls fluttered around him.

your pussy was so warm, wet, tight, and absolutely intoxicating just like how he knew it would be.

“such a good pussy,” he moaned, holding onto your hips as he thrusted. “got my dick all wet in your sweet cum, baby.”

there was a creamy ring of your cum around the base of his dick, which made a lewd squelching sound every time he thrusted.

you just whimpered in response, turning your head to the side. he was fucking you so deeply, dragging every inch of his long length through your tight walls.

you held onto his biceps, digging your nails into his skin. he bit his lip, looking down at your pretty supple body and the way you just laid there and took it, letting him fuck you nice and good.

“‘m close, baby,” he told you, grabbing your chin and turning your head so you were looking up at him again. “where do you want me to cum?”

you were so sleepy and fucked out that you could still barely comprehend his words. you also were starting to feel your second orgasm brewing in your stomach which made it even harder to focus.

you just babbled some incoherent nonsense.

“words, honey,” he said, squeezing your thighs. “tell me where you want my cum.”

“inside,” you cried out, tightening your legs around his waist. “wanna be filled.”

“fuck,” jake hissed. “i’ll fill you up real good. i’ll make you nice and warm, yeah baby?”

“please!” you yelled. “please, i need it.”

your words sent him straight over the edge. he choked on a moan as ropes of his warm cum spilled inside of you, drenching your walls.

seeing him hit his orgasm sent you over the edge as well, and suddenly you were clenching around him, sucking him completely dry.

waves of sweat and pleasure and euphoria washed over the both of you. you swear he was sending you to another dimension where the only thing you knew was pleasure and jake’s addictive cock.

he slowly rocked his hips in and out of you, milking both of your orgasms until you were both done and spent.

by then, you were both exhausted. he slowly pulled out and collapsed next to you. the two of you laid on your backs, staring at the ceiling in shock at what you’d just done.

you went into his room with the expectation of a little bit of comfort after your awful nightmare, not to have been given two orgasms.

for a few minutes, neither of you said anything.

then, jake spoke up.

“so, did i get you to forget about your nightmare?” he asked, turning his head to the side to look at you.

at that point, you couldn’t even remember what the nightmare was about.

“i think you did,” you answered.

he pulled you into his chest and kissed the top of your head. within a few minutes, both of you were asleep in each others arms.

-

a/n long jake smut for 1k and bc im horny for him.

thank you for reading <3

overthink this, overthink that - reader x ni-ki

warning: cursing, little angst, slow burn, suggestive content.

flirting was something you were unexpectedly good at, especially to your crush ni-ki... even though you knew you didn't stand a chance.

you love giving him compliments, spamming hearts on his posts, teasing him, staring at him like you're so in-love, sometimes you'll playfully touch him.

ni-ki though, he just ignore you. every single time, because to him, there's no way you're serious about what you're doing... there's no way you're serious about him.

and you knew he gets annoyed and will just straight-up walked away from you but it wasn't like you had any grand expectations.

you just liked him too much to stop.

you and jay were waiting for everyone to arrive, casually teasing each other like always but he was pushing it today, so you decided to bite back.

plus, let's be honest, your friend was looking a little too good right now. "i'd totally kiss you right now if you don't stop." you groaned before rolling your eyes at him.

it's a joke. a normal joke between the two of you.

except, of course, ni-ki just had to walk in right at that moment and the second your eyes met, you froze, eyes widening like you'd been caught doing something you weren't supposed to.

see? it would've been easy for him to believe you actually liked him if it weren't for the way you acted with everyone else.

ni-ki shook his head like he was disappointed in you.

…seriously, why do he always catch you at the bad time?

like that one time you haven't showered and the moment you stepped outside looking like a complete mess, you bumped into him.

and you must've look so bad that he started blushing and chuckling before walking away. you ran straight back inside and swore to never ever leave the house again unless you looked presentable.

though sometimes, it's like "fuck it!" you'd do whatever you want whether he's gonna be disappointed or not. it's not like he's gonna like you anyway, right?

"tsk, tsk. you pissed him off again," jay chuckled at ni-ki's reaction.

"i didn't!" you rolled your eyes. "you know he's always like that when he sees me, i haven't even talked to him yet."

jay just shook his head and if you were a guy, he'd probably smack you for being this dumb.

you went inside and spotted ni-ki sitting on the couch, scrolling through his phone and the second he saw you coming, he turned his back on you.

so you sat down right in front of him.

"what are you doing?" you grinned, leaning close.

"get out of my face."

you frowned. "tsk, you've got attitude now?"

he ignored you, pretending to laugh at whatever was on his screen then you tried to peek but he quickly moved his phone away.

"why are you-"

"go awaaay!" ni-ki groaned, trying to push you but you made yourself heavy and slid your head right into his chest.

you grinned, looking up at him. "i don't want to. i wanna be with you."

ni-ki rolled his eyes. "yeah, says the one who's for everybody."

your jaw dramatically dropped, looking around the room and at him like, who's everybody?

"you must be everybody," you shot back, pushing your face way too close to his.

ni-ki's heart started racing uncontrollably, tip of his ear were turning red again cause you were staring at him like he was the only person in the world.

and he hates it. you're the one who likes him yet he's the only one feeling these things... and you were probably just joking.

so he wished you would stop messing with him.

frustrated, ni-ki pushed you away with a little force, enough to make you fall back onto the couch while laughing.

"oh my... where are you going?" you called him out but he just walked away.

and today was just not it.

not enough sleep and you haven't eaten yet.

you were also late, your quiz results were bad, and to make things worse, you just got scolded.

oh, and because the universe clearly had it out for you today you forgot your wallet too, so now you had to walk home and your legs were killing you.

ni-ki was standing with a group of friends when he spotted you in the distance, walking alone with your head down.

you heard the familiar voice even when you were so lost in your thought. how could you not? that's your source of strength after all...

but out of all the days, how about he mess with you instead this time?

just as you were about to call him out, he pretended not to see you, leaning closer to one of the girls beside him as she playfully shoved his arm. his eyes were sparkling, his grin stretched so wide it practically lit up his face.

and you thought, that's definitely nothing like how he is with you.

your heart ached again as you watched, then you felt foolish, your cheeks burning as the weight of your behavior settled in.

you really have been chasing after someone who clearly doesn't feel the same way and worse, you wondered if you had made him uncomfortable.

you felt sorry for ni-ki and... yourself.

so you started to avoid him. you didn't think about whether he noticed or cared, you knew he might but still, you just needed to stop bothering him.

you would leave early and walk longer distances just to make sure you wouldn't bump into him whenever he'll take jogs in the morning. you would pretend to fix your bag or look at your watch so you wouldn't see him if he's hanging outside with others, though your heart still aches after hearing his voice.

sometimes, ni-ki's eyes would scan rooms without even realizing who he was searching for and when he didn't find you, he'd shake it off and move on, assuming you were just busy somewhere.

you became content to yourself staying in your own little bubble, no more hanging out these days with everyone, and no more forcing yourself to someone.

and now, ni-ki noticed because when he walked out of the house and he saw you pass by, your head was tilted slightly down and you were completely immersed in whatever it is you're reading.

and your class ended a while ago, you didn't expect that it'll rain today and had forgotten your umbrella.

the rain was relentless, pouring down heavily as you stood under a little roof near the gate, the only bit of shelter from the downpour but it did not help to keep you dry, your clothes were already soaked. you just hoped that the notebooks in your bag are still safe.

you wiped your face, trying to brush the water off from the wind that pushed the rain sideways but it was useless, the rain kept coming, cold and unforgiving. and despite the chill, you didn't panic or try to shield yourself. you just stood there, staring out at streets, waiting patiently for it to stop or at least slow down.

it's going to be okay.

most of the other students had already left, leaving the school grounds quiet. ni-ki walked towards the gate, then his steps slowed down when he saw you standing there with your figure illuminated dimly by the glow of the streetlights.

and his first instinct was to stop and turn back. the memory of how you used to call out to him, how you'd run up to him with your usual energy, it flashed through his mind.

to be honest, he didn't find you annoying, he was just overwhelmed and shy. a defense mechanism, maybe? he's overthinking, maybe?

he stepped to the side, hiding behind a nearby pillar. he wasn't sure why he hid though. he watched you rub at your nose, visibly shivering as the rain continued to drench you.

ni-ki hesitated for a moment, completely torn between staying hidden and stepping in but when you sneezed, "shit." he muttered under his breath, running a hand through his hair as he let out a sigh, totally frustrated with himself.

finally, he walked towards you. you didn't even notice him until he spoke, "you'll get sick if you stay like this." he said, dropping his umbrella and started to remove his jacket.

you blinked at him, water dripping from your lashes as you hugged yourself. you watched him for a second then slowly, ni-ki handed you his jacket. you muttered "thanks."

ni-ki also studied you for a moment, waiting for something. maybe a look? a word? just anything that resembled the way you used to act around him.

but nothing came, you simply adjusted the jacket around your shoulders with your calm and detached expression as if he's just someone you knew.

"i can walk you home." ni-ki said, his voice was loud enough for you to hear through the sound of heavy rain.

"you sure?" you asked, wiping your face again.

he smiled and nodded.

ni-ki glanced at you as you both hurried down the sidewalk, you were both dodging puddles and rushing towards the nearest shelter. and each time you reached one, you would stop for just a moment to catch your breath before rushing out with him again, running through the rain like you were playing some kind of game.

but you haven't said anything at all. the rhythm of your movement, the way you picked up the pace never looking back, told him that you were just determined to get home as fast as possible.

ni-ki was thrilled, his heart was beating fast as he dashed forward with you on his side. you both stopped just under the roof, he's panting slightly, grinning but it faded when he looked at you standing a little further away like you're not exhilarated by the chase.

he didn't even had the time to dwell on it because soon enough, you were ready to move again to head towards the final stretch before your place.

when you reached the familiar corner near your home, you stopped, ni-ki looked at you. "i'll walk you the rest of the way."

you shook your head, taking off his jacket. "no, i'll take it from here." you said, slipped out his jacket to hand it back to him.

ni-ki opened his mouth to protest, "keep it..." he said quietly but you already turned away.

"thanks!" you said. ni-ki stood there for a moment with the jacket in his hands, watching you as you disappeared into the distance.

next day, at lunch, he was just about to head to cafeteria. his eyes were wandering again when he saw you, you were sitting on the steps with your back pressed against the wall, burying your face in your hands.

you were startled slightly when you heard footsteps, you quickly bowed your head to acknowledge him, hoping he would just walk past, but he didn't.

instead, ni-ki stopped in front of you and sat close enough that his knees were now brushing against yours.

you dodged slightly when you saw his hands reach out. "what are you doing?" your voice was hoarse, weak.

he didn't answer. instead, he gently grabbed your other hand and pressed the back of his against your forehead after noticing how red your cheeks and lips were.

"i knew it." he sighed and held out his hand. you hesitated but he didn't give you much choice, gently but firmly pulling you to your feet. "come on."

he led you to the clinic and guided you to sit on the bed, the bed's height put your legs directly in his line of sight and he stared for a moment, swallowing hard, before looking away.

you watched as he leaned over you, reaching for the blanket folded at the head of the bed and his face came so close to yours that you could hear his breath.

so close...

ni-ki froze for a moment, his eyes locked with yours, he cleared his throat and draped the blanket over your shoulders.

"can you walk home?" the nurse asked as she will send you home.

"yeah."

ni-ki skipped class to take you home, he noticed your wobbly steps so he removed the backpack from your shoulders to carry it instead.

you didn't protest when he took the bag and the two of you started to walk side by side but after a few more wobbly steps, he gently placed your hand in his arm, offering you support.

ni-ki stayed silent, he wanted to be annoyed and he wanna start scolding you but at the same time he can't even seem to stop himself from smiling, and when you got home, he was spamming you with messages.

love of my life: hey, you good?

love of my life: are you alive?

love of my life: oiiiii

love of my life: yeah, stop talking to me.

he threw his phone onto the bed.

you're always like this, right? so, he's done. he's not going to text you anymore. if you didn't even bother replying, then why should he-

a notification sound cut off his thoughts.

you: my head and my body hurts.

ni-ki sat up immediately, fumbling to unlock his phone before getting out of bed in search of jay.

"hyu-hyung…" he called out, clearing his throat.

jay raised a brow at him.

"i heard your friend was sick," ni-ki muttered before looking away.

jay blinked confused, then shrugged. "yeah? and i heard you took her home."

"yeah!" ni-ki forced a laugh. "uhh… you gonna visit her?"

jay shot him a confused look again. "why would i?"

"i don't know…" ni-ki mumbled.

he snorted. "she's got a mom, you know. she'll be fine." he turned back to his phone, already moving on from the conversation.

ni-ki hesitated before speaking again. "remember when you guys freaked out when i got sick? imagine her mom being alone and taking care of that idiot."

jay froze. "oh, shit." he got up from his seat. "okay, i'm going."

"wait, wait, wait!" ni-ki grabbed his arm. "you don't need help?"

jay narrowed his eyes. "do you wanna come?"

ni-ki crossed his arms. "i mean… if you need help, then, yeah, i'll go."

jay forced a smiled, totally done with the both of you. "...right."

you started hanging out with them again, just laughing in the background, blending in, and not standing out like you usually did.

it was weird to ni-ki.

"the hell's wrong with her? is she feeling sick again or something?"

when he saw you alone on the balcony, he didn't hesitate to walk over. he stood beside you quietly, resting his arms on the railing while staring ahead. "so you don't like me anymore?"

you turned to him, confused. "huh?"

his eyes widened slightly like he hadn't meant to say that out loud. "nothing!" he blurted out, immediately annoyed at himself.

you stared at him, completely lost. "what's your problem? so you like it when i annoy you?"

"what? no. hell no."

he pushed off the railing, leaving before you could ask any more questions.

at home, you couldn't help but text him.

you: were you waiting for me to flirt with you today? lmaooo

love of my life: you're full of shit.

you: i was kidding. who said i stopped liking you?

ni-ki read the message twice with a smirk forming at his lips.

you: i just don't wanna make you uncomfortable. lemme move on in peace, okay?

his smirk dropped.

love of my life: so you can flirt with someone else instead, right?

you: stop that.

love of my life: why? cause it's true?

he leaned back against his bed, waiting for a reply, fully expecting you to argue back but the screen stayed blank, removing his smile completely.

ni-ki sighed, tapping the edge of his phone against his palm. did i go too far? he started typing, then deleted it. typed again, then erased it.

you: can you come get me?

love of my life: where are you?

his heart skipped a beat, grabbing his jacket without any second thoughts.

"i can't believe you…" ni-ki muttered, staring at you as you shivered in the cold, wearing nothing but thin layers.

"i didn't know it was gonna snow today!" you protested, rubbing your arms.

he said, slipping off his inner jacket and made you wear it, muttering about how stubborn you were. especially since you'd just recovered from being sick.

your eyes lit up as you spotted something. "can we stop there?" you pointed at a bench near a tteokbokki stall, where the warmth from the steam cleared the air.

ni-ki grabbed your hand and shoved it into his coat pocket as he led you there.

your heart started going crazy. "you're so gonna make me delusional." you murmured. "i'll think i have a chance."

"everyone has a chance with me."

you rolled your eyes, "you're the only one who has a chance with me." is what you wanted to say.

"and yet you say i'm for everybody?" you scoffed. ni-ki pulled your hand away and placed it back in your lap.

"no, no, i'm sorry, hold it longer, please?" you pouted, tilting your head. "just this time? riki?"

"wha-" he was flustered after hearing his real name from your mouth. then he sighed heavily, "fine," he said before taking your hand again and shoving it back into his pocket.

you giggled, and ni-ki smiled while shaking his head, watching you like you were the biggest idiot alive.

"seriously," you sighed, "i don't like it when you keep pushing the idea that i flirt with other people…"

"but you do," he shot back. "and you keep bullshitting me. you don't like me."

your chest tightened. "i like you," you muttered, "i just… i don't know. what more do you want me to do?"

the two of you held each other's gaze, eyes were searching for... honesty? sincerity?

ni-ki's jaw clenched. "forget it," he muttered, looking away.

you pressed your lips into a thin line, swallowing back the words you wanted to say.

jeongseong: really? that's so funny.

you: what's so funny??? guys are so fucking complicated like? i was moving on and he'd just do all that for nothing.

jeongseong: maybe stop messing around so you'll also be taken seriously.

you: i don't mess around.

jeongseong: you don't even know what's his favorite color, his favorite food, what's the name of his pet... you just flirt with him.

you: omg??

jeongseong: yeah... tsk. don't talk to me.

next day, you just stopped messing with everyone.

"y/n, you look good today."

and you walked past them like you didn't hear it.

ni-ki watched as you brushed off the attention you once entertained so easily. you weren't laughing with them, weren't throwing back flirty comebacks.

are you trying to impress him or something?

love of my life: where are you spending your summer break?

you: secret.

he didn't reply so you folded.

you: at my aunt's.

love of my life: alone?

you: yeah. need to relax, too.

love of my life: can i go too?

you nearly choked before replying.

you: i don't know if my mom will allow that…

love of my life: i'll ask her myself.

love of my life: unless you don't want me to come?

"are you crazy?" you muttered under your breath while looking at the screen.

mom said yes immediately, too... and she wouldn't stop talking about ni-ki.

"you're not actually thinking he'll go, right? besides, how could you even allow that?" you asked in disbelief as she unpacked groceries, acting completely unfazed.

"allow what?" she asked, faking her innocence.

"letting ni-ki come with me! i was supposed to go alone!"

she chuckled, clearly amused by your frustration. "oh, come on. it's your chance."

"my chance for what?" you snapped, crossing your arms. "i am moving on from him. that was old news."

"oh, really?" she mused, her smirk growing wider. "sure."

you groaned. "and how could you even think this is a good idea? letting a girl my age go off with a boy?"

she simply shrugged. "i guess i trust you."

ni-ki texted you that same night.

love of my life: so, any updates on our trip? should i bring snacks?

you: please tell me you're just kidding.

love of my life: no, why?

you: because this is supposed to be my trip, not ours.

love of my life: don't care, i'm great company. you'll thank me later.

you stared at his message for a long moment before tossing your phone onto your bed.

why is he doing this?

the train station felt busy, you stood there near the entrance, clutching the train tickets in your hand while waiting patiently for ni-ki.

and like always, he stood out from the crowd, dressed cool in a leather jacket over a tank top that hugged his figure, paired with a baggy jeans and sneakers.

his hair was slightly messy because of the wind but he looked so annoyingly perfect. time seemed to stop when ni-ki smiled andwalked towards you.

you shook your head, quickly turning away and started walking inside without even waiting for him.

ni-ki's smile dropped when he saw you turn your back on him. his steps quickened in panic. "y/n! wait up!" he called out, hoping you're not mad at him for being a few minutes late.

inside the train, the two of you stood a just few meters apart. you leaned against a railing, your eyes were fixed on the view outside the window while ni-ki was also leaning against the railing opposite of you.

your eyes would often meet and each time, you'd both quickly look away, pretending to be deeply invested in the passing scenery, and ni-ki would sip from his drink, as if he was very thirsty.

the train doors opened when it reached the next station. people rushed and the once spacious carriage was quickly filled, making ni-ki move closer to you.

then the crowd surged, pushing everyone closer. "sorry." he apologized when he slightly bumped at you but before he could step back, he was pushed forward again.

you found yourself pressed against the metal railing near the seats. ni-ki's arm shot out, gripping the bar to steady himself but also accidentally caging you beneath him. you gulped, feeling your boobs lightly pressed against him.

ni-ki froze when he also felt it, it's like a soft cushion underneath him.

his face heated as he realized the position you were in. his ears burned and he immediately tried to move backwards.

the crowd behind him didn't make it easy but he also didn't care. he leaned back just enough to give you some space, even if it meant pushing someone behind him.

shortly after, the train swayed again. forcing him to lean into you once more and you placed a hand on his chest. ni-ki's hand slightly brushed your shoulders as he pressed his hands against the door for support.

he quickly grabbed your hand and placed it on his arms instead... hoping you didn't feel his heart that was pounding so hard.

his eyes flicked down to your boobs for a split second before he quickly looked away. just making sure that you can breathe...

the two of you stayed like that, pressed far too close in the packed train car and every slight movement and every accidental brush of your body against his, made you both nervous.

when the train finally reached the next stop and the crowd thinned, ni-ki stepped back as much as he could, exhaling a deep breath through his pursed lips, his cheeks puffing out briefly before blowing air.

"sorry… about that." he muttered, feeling nervous.

you smiled weakly, your own face were still burning. "it's fine." you said quickly right after.

you're aunt was totally pleased by him, and later that night, you wandered into the bathroom to brush your teeth.

and when you looked around, you saw niki leaning against the wall nearby who's towel-drying his damp hair, wearing a plain white t-shirt that has a fabric so thin you could see his body underneath.

he was scrolling through his phone but the moment he noticed you, he set it down and crossed his arms.

"what?" you asked, your voice muffled by your toothbrush.

he didn't say anything, just kept watching you.

feeling self-conscious, you jokingly covered your butt with your hand. "stop staring."

ni-ki's mouth dropped open in exaggerated disbelief. "you actually think i'm checking you out?"

you shrugged, spitting into the sink.

"for your information, i was just proud that you finally took a shower"

you rinsed your mouth and glanced at him with a smirk. "that's unbelievable." continuing with, "goodnight, ni-ki."

he chuckled, running a hand through his hair, watching as you walked past him. "goodnight."

you stirred in your bed, it was midnight. the thin sheet clung to your sweaty skin because of the unbearable heat. you sat up while groaning softly, your damp hair were sticking to your neck.

"auntie?" you called out, voice cracking slightly.

no response.

sliding your feet into slippers, you got out of your room. the house silent except for the faint creak of the ceiling fan spinning. you made your way to the living room, the sliding door to the balcony was open, letting the cool breeze enter the room.

and just as you passed by his room, the door creaked open, a hand shot out, fingers wrapping around your wrist then pulled you back.

you gasped softly, barely catching yourself from stumbling as you turned to see ni-ki standing in his doorway.

"what are you doing?"

"it's too hot in my room." you whispered, "i couldn't sleep."

ni-ki's grip loosened, but didn't let go. his eyes flickered to the open balcony door, then back to you. "sleep here."

you blinked at him, still flustered but nodding slowly. "o-okay…" you mumbled, though in your mind, you had already made a plan. you'd agree for now but the moment he'll let his guard down, you'd slip off to your own room and lock the door.

but ni-ki saw right through you and the second you took a step, he gently grabbed your arm and tugged you back again. "are you planning to escape from me?"

you rolled your eyes, brushing past him and pushing him gently out of your way.

and once you're in his room, you immediately flopped onto his bed, pulling his blanket over you.

the soft fabric smelled just like him, you tried so hard to ignore the way your heart raced at the scent.

"you're really gonna use the blanket? it's also a bit hot in here."

you didn't respond, just pulled the blanket tighter around you.

ni-ki shook his head as he remove his shirt over his head and tossed it onto a chair in the corner.

he likes to sleep naked.

"you're such an idiot." he muttered, half-laughing. "it's already hot and you're over there cooking yourself like a steamed dumpling."

you didn't dignify him with a response. instead, you stayed silent, hoping he'd eventually leave you alone.

but then, you felt the weight of his head pressed gently against your back through the blanket.

"why are you hiding under that thing?" he asked, his voice were soft but teasing.

"shut up, i'm fine." you mumbled, your voice muffled by the blanket.

ni-ki scoffed. "fine? you're gonna pass out in there. what are you even hiding from?"

"i'm not hiding."

"oh, really?" he said, shifting slightly to get more comfortable.

you groaned, peeking your head out just enough to look back and glare at him. "maybe i just like the blanket, okay?"

ni-ki tilted his head, smirking. "or maybe you're trying to avoid looking at me because i took my shirt off."

"no, i'm not!"

"so you did notice... y/n, you're so obvious." he sighed, "if you're so uncomfortable, just say so. i'll put my shirt back on."

"i'm not uncomfortable, take that off."

"right." he said and rolled his eyes. ni-ki still stood up and wore his shirt again.

you removed the blanket in a hurry, "i said take it off!"

soft sunlight shone through the window as you sat at the edge of the bed while stretching your arms above your head with a yawn.

you don't know why but after you finished washing your face and brushing your teeth, you went back to his room.

ni-ki also woke up and did his thing. he went back and threw himself on the bed "morning."

then a knock came from the door before he could tease you further. both of your heads whipped towards it and your eyes widened in panic. "ni-ki, are you awake?" your aunt called out.

you immediately turned to him, your voice a frantic whisper. "she can't see me in here. she's going to get the wrong idea."

ni-ki raised an eyebrow, "the wrong idea, huh?"

"ni-ki, seriously!"

your aunt knocked again, louder this time.

he jumped out of bed, "hide here." he said, opening the closet and gently shoving you inside. giving you a thumbs up and quickly closed the door, leaving you in darkness.

he ran a hand through his hair, smoothing it down before opening the bedroom door to face your aunt, who stood there with her arms crossed.

"where is she?" she asked, her eyes scanning the room suspiciously.

"wh-who?" ni-ki asked, yawning.

"y/n.. she's not in her room, so i assumed she was here." your aunt said, stepping into the room.

ni-ki shrugged, leaning against the doorframe. "i don't know, auntie. i haven't seen her this morning."

just then, your phone started to buzz from inside the closet.

your aunt turned towards the sound. "what's that?" she asked, walking closer to the closet.

ni-ki quickly stepped in her path, his hand resting casually on the closet door. "oh, uh, that's probably coming from her room." he said smoothly. "she must've left her phone there."

your aunt raised an eyebrow. "really?"

before she could question further, ni-ki's phone buzzed in his pocket. he pulled it out and read the text from you:

you: tell aunt i just went to convenience store. i'll be back soon.

he quickly turned the screen toward your aunt. "look, she just texted me. she's at the convenience store. said she'll be back soon."

your aunt glanced at the text and sighed. "thank you, tell her to come see me as soon as she gets back."

ni-ki nodded. "will do."

once your aunt finally left, ni-ki closed the door and hurried to open the closet. you stumbled out, brushing yourself off and leaned against the closet door, pressing your back against it. you hands were tucked behind you, gripping your phone tightly.

ni-ki crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow. "i just told her you must've left your phone in your room and then you'll text that you're outside? you're lucky she didn't get suspicious." he sighed, shaking his head.

you shrugged, trying to play it cool. "it's fine. thanks for covering for me."

"why did you even sleep here in my room?" he asked, rubbing his temples in mock exasperation.

you scoffed, "you're the one who insisted, remember?"

ni-ki smirked, clearly enjoying your frustration. "yeah, blame me." he took a step closer, his eyes locking onto yours and slowly, he brought his hands up to press against the closet on either side of your head, his smile faded.

and instead of you pushing him, you actually welcomed it, when his lips neared yours, you leaned in to meet him halfway.

the kiss was warm and unhurried, both of you were smiling into it like you couldn't help yourselves.

it wasn't just a kiss, it was a moment just for the two of you. his lips pressed on yours again and again, the smiles were there as if neither of you wanted it to end.

you both let out soft, breathless laughs.

"ni-ki! i need your help!" your aunt called him out again.

he glanced towards the door. "one second!" he answered, then turned his attention back to you with a smile.

"i'll distract her." he whispered, leaning in to steal another quick kiss.

"go." you whispered, grinning against his lips.

he pulled back slightly, then pressed one more before he fully stepped away, running a hand through his hair as he walked to the door.

you couldn't help but laugh softly, leaning back against the closet door, biting your lips while looking down.

you sat at the dining table with ni-ki and your aunt, attempting to follow her story about something that happened at work.

his leg would brush against yours under the table. at first, you thought it was an accident, but when it happened again and his lips formed a smile.

and when your aunt went on about a particularly dramatic coworker, ni-ki boldly held your hand on his lap.

you froze for a second, glancing at him in surprise, but he just gave you a soft smile and squeezed it gently.

luckily, your aunt didn't seem to notice because she's too engrossed in her own story.

you couldn't focus at all. every time you tried to pay attention, your eyes would drift to ni-ki, who listened to her attentively while tracing and caressing your wrist.

you forgot how to breathe as he completely derailed your thoughts.

you looked away and pretended to be absorbed in your aunt's story but it was no use, your heart was racing and the warmth of his touch wasn't helping.

when your aunt finally excused herself to grab something from the kitchen, you took a deep breath and let out a quiet laugh while shaking your head.

if the you from a few months ago could see this, she'd be so jealous.

after saying goodbye to your aunt, you and ni-ki boarded the train home. and just like before, it was packed, leaving no room to breathe.

this time, your back was pressed against his chest, and you held onto his arm for balance while he gripped the handle above you for support.

ni-ki saw a few strands of your hair brushing against your cheek. slowly, he reached out with his free hand and gently pushed your hair to the side, exposing the side of your neck.

he stared at it for a moment and without hesitation, he leaned in closer and pretended to bite your neck, his teeth grazed the air and before you could respond, he leaned in again and pressed a quick, soft kiss to your neck, making your grip on his arm tighten slightly.

now, you were both exhausted, tangled up in his bed, and it's so warm that the room felt even cozier.

ni-ki's arms were wrapped around your waist, his head were resting against your chest as you played with his soft black hair.

your legs were draped over his waist while his hands traced your thighs, caressing your skin absentmindedly.

"have you seen my new post?"

"yeah, i liked it."

"you didn't even comment."

you commented three fire emojis but ni-ki was already happy with that. you were both laughing, whispering stories with quiet chuckles, and were too tired to keep talking but also too content to stop.

ni-ki's breathing has slowed, and just when you thought he had drifted off his sleep...

"y/n?"

you hummed in response, caressing his neck.

"…i love you."

a/n: this might be 7k words or more, sorry :3

マスターリストm.list

1.8k NOTES WHAT OMG 😖🫶🏼

you broke me first - l.hs

pairing: virgin!lee heeseung x experienced fem!reader

synopsis: you and heeseung are the school’s golden pair — popular, admired, and constantly shipped. the only problem? you can’t stand him. from competing on exams to gym class, you’re always neck and neck, and no one gets under your skin like he does. but while you see a rival, he sees the love of his life. when you overhear a hushed conversation that breaks you, will heeseung be able to win you back?

featuring: all of enha, winter from aespa, yuqi from (g)i-dle, and keeho from p1h

genre: angst... slow burn, some fluff, kissing, skinship, SMUTTTT, college au, first love trope?? sorta? one sided enemies to lovers

warnings: smut so mdni (18+), alcohol consumption, vandalizing property, Sexual Tension, everyone is around the same age (21-23), lowercase intended <3

playlist: you broke me first by tate mcrae & what was i made for — billie eilish

(smut warnings under cut!)

wc: 13.271k

a/n: first fic is here! plsplspls leave feedback as anything helps!! was listening to you broke me first and got inspo for a kinda angsty fic pls bare with me :3 anyways! enjoy the read <3<3

smut content: mention of toys (but no use), fingering, squirting, unprotected sex (not for you), dry humping, switch! hee and reader, riding, mating press, too much kissing, masturbation (m.), breeding kink, slight dacryphilia, oral (m. & f.), deepthroating, belly bulge, creampie, size kinkish, big dick! hee, not much aftercare but it's like fluffy, y/n has a “reputation” that she gets around, VIRGIN HEESEUNG (but no one knows…) i think thats it? lmk if i missed anything ◡̈

not proofread!

lee. fucking. heeseung. you hate him. you can't stand him. he always knows what to say just to piss you off. you might be wondering, "why don't you just try to avoid him?" the issue is... you do. you try with ALL your power but to no avail, he's in the same friend group as you.

your friends, knowing you hate him, decided to combine friend groups to see if you and him could mend things. spoiler alert: it failed miserably.

you felt safe in your small circle with keeho (the man you deemed to be your biological older brother — you aren't related), yuqi (your junior high best friend), and winter (your literal wife).

you guys were well known around the entire city of seoul for being the "it group" — always partying, hooking up, and somehow still acing every class (while nursing massive hangovers).

however, heeseung's friend group consisted of the golden boys in decelis university: park jongseong (known as jay, he hates his given name), sim jaeyun (known as the australian transfer student, jake), park sunghoon (the insanely hot figure skater), kim sunoo (the bubbliest person you've ever met), yang jungwon (the boy with feline features, however you've made a special note to never piss him off cause he has a black belt), and nishimura riki (known as ni-ki because he wanted to be different).

you loved riki. he was like your younger brother — chaotic, blunt, and always three steps ahead of everyone. you’d even joked once that if you had to suffer heeseung’s presence, at least you got riki out of it.

unfortunately, riki had the worst habit of instigating chaos.

“truth or dare?” he asked one friday night, grinning like he already had your life planned out. everyone was crammed into jay’s ridiculously large basement, music low, snacks half eaten, and bodies sprawled on beanbags and plush carpet.

you should’ve said “truth.” you knew you should’ve. but you weren’t a coward.

“dare,” you answered, arms crossed, eyes sharp.

the group erupted in ooooh's in perfect synchronicity.

riki’s grin only widened. “i dare you to sit on heeseung’s lap for five minutes.”

you almost lunged across the room.

“riki,” you hissed, “you are so dead.”

he just wiggled his brows suggestively. “i’m a baby. you wouldn’t hurt me.”

the worst part? he was right.

you looked over at heeseung, who was watching you like a cat watching a cornered mouse — lazy smirk, fingers casually drumming against his knee. “scared, sweetheart?”

“i’ll kill you in your sleep,” you said sweetly as you stalked over and dropped yourself into his lap like he was made of cardboard and air.

he oofed, not because you were heavy, but because he wasn’t expecting you to actually do it.

“wow,” he murmured, lips near your ear. “you smell like citrus and bad decisions.”

you resisted the urge to elbow him in the ribs.

five minutes. you just had to survive five minutes.

but then his hands casually settled on your waist, and you felt it — the spark. the electric, traitorous, goddamn spark that told you this was a very, very bad idea.

because maybe, just maybe, your hatred wasn’t as pure as you thought- no. what are you thinking??? you immediately shook the feeling that was buzzing inside you and blamed it on the alcohol swimming in your blood.

you definitely. hated heeseung. yup, yeah, you really did.

heeseung on the other hand? he was just praying to every god he could think of that you couldn't feel how sweaty his palms were getting.

because he was panicking. full blown, internal screaming, oh-no-she’s-sitting-on-me-and-she’s-warm kind of panicking. he hadn't expected you to actually follow through on your usual threats, much less practically straddle him in front of your mutual friends.

but now? now he was just trying to not pass out from the sheer force of your perfume and presence and the weight of years of unresolved tension that sat heavier than you ever could.

"you're sweating," you said flatly, side eyeing him with that expression that usually meant murder or mockery — or both. "you good?"

"totally," he croaked. "i always nearly die when beautiful people threaten me. it's, like, my thing."

you blinked once. twice.

"did you just call me beautiful?"

"i said what i said," he muttered, then immediately regretted everything.

your brows lifted in slow, dangerous amusement. "you feeling okay, heeseung? you hitting on me while i’m threatening you?”

“wouldn’t be the first time,” he said, almost too quiet for you to hear.

and there it was again. the spark. like a lighter flicked too close to your frayed nerves.

you looked away, choosing to focus on literally anything else, but his grip on your waist tightened just slightly, grounding you, almost daring you to acknowledge it.

“how much longer do i have to sit on this assholes lap?” you questioned under your breath, reminding yourself, reminding him, that this was temporary.

"4 minutes!" jake sang back as his accented voice rang in your ears. fuck, it's only been one minute? you thought to yourself... until he spoke.

“i could ruin us in three,” he whispered, warm breath tickling your ear. he was so close you could practically feel his labored breathing against your back. you craned your neck to the side so you could look him in the eyes, "what did you just say???" heeseung was at a loss for words — his brain only drawing blanks.

did he say what he thought he said in his head out loud? impossible. he's hidden it so well, no one in your guys' shared friend group had even suspected his overbearing attraction towards you.

so heeseung did the only thing he could think of. he gulped.

just as your gaze dropped to his adams apple, sunghoon cleared his throat, reducing the fiery tension between you two to reduce to a simmer. "time's up" he stated. and just like that, the warmth you once shared was gone.

as the game progressed, the most interesting things to occur were jake kissing sunghoon on the cheek, riki vandalizing an old alley way that never saw the sun, and winter lady-and-the-tramping a twizzler with keeho.

you and heeseung never dared to even spare a glance in each other's direction for the rest of the night.

───

you laid awake, staring at the ceiling in jay's basement while trying to get comfy on the leather couch that probably cost more than your entire wardrobe. you couldn't sleep. and the reason? none other than your self-proclaimed arch nemesis: lee heeseung.

your friend groups slept on different floors to prevent you and heeseung arguing and waking up the entire house. you slowly got up, attempting and (barely) succeeding to not step on a sleeping figure sprawled on the floor.

as you walk up the stairs from the basement, you hear two people whisper shouting at each other.

you glance at the time displayed on your phone.

a measly 3:16 am stared brightly at you. who's awake at this hour?? as you step closer to the hushed voices, you think you can make out the unmistakeable deepness of riki's voice and heeseung's annoying(ly hot) whispers, tinged with sleep.

"why the fuck would you dare HER of all people to sit on MY lap????" heeseung shouts quietly, clearly frustrated. riki bursts into a fit of giggles. "dude, don't tell me you feel something for her, don't you guys like hate each other?" he says between snide little chuckles.

heeseung freezes. there's no way riki really caught on to what he was supposed to never let slip through the cracks... right?! so he musters up all the dignity he has left and defensively grunts a series of defenses "nowhywouldieverseeherlikethatsheisn'tmytypeandithinkshe'sgross"

riki blankly stares back at heeseung's panicking eyes, "okayyy," he drags the word out, "you don't need to put her down like that, she's like my older sister, dude" riki spits back.

your lips twitch in a small smile, just for a second. just long enough for riki to catch your eyes peeking behind the corner. he nods once, subtle and solid. always in your corner.

but the comfort dies as soon as heeseung opens his mouth.

"i could never love someone like her."

and the world stops.

he says it so casually. almost like it’s a joke. like it's just another throwaway comment tossed between drinks and half-meant insults. but it lands with the weight of something cruelly true — or at least, something you believe he means.

you feel the breath hitch in your throat. just once.

riki's gaze is drawn to your frozen frame. and that's when everything freezes. heeseung whips around to see you standing there. eyes blown and glossy.

riki shifts, but he doesn’t move to try and console you — he knows better. knows this is something that'll bruise. something you need time to process, alone.

you bite back tears. “right,” you say, quietly. “of course.”

heeseung’s expression flickers — confusion, regret, something else — but you’ve already masked the pain. emotion draining from your face like you’ve trained for it. like it’s a sport. like if you stop moving, the hurt will catch up.

“i didn’t mean it like that,” he says, a little too late, a little too soft.

you readjust your posture, fixing your shirt.

“you meant it exactly like that,” you reply, and it’s not even bitter. it’s worse. numb.

riki’s there before heeseung can say anything else. standing between you like a wall. like a shield.

“walk away,” he tells you gently, and you do.

because if you stay, you might ask him why not. and you’re not sure your heart could take the answer.

riki turns back to heeseung, flames he's never seen before burning in the younger boys irises that are normally filled with mischief and teasing glints. but all of a sudden none of that is there anymore. it's pure, unfiltered anger. raw emotion.

heeseung wants him to yell at him. say something, anything. but nothing comes. riki just walks upstairs like he doesn't even know who heeseung is anymore.

and maybe he doesn't.

───

the next morning, when heeseung wakes up, it's almost peaceful. until rain begins to tip tap on the roof and everything comes crashing down. his chest is tight and immediately swells with regret. so much he thinks it'll spill out of him just like the rain outside.

he needs to talk to you. make sure you're okay. but he knows he's the last person you want to see right now. still, he has to try

as he descends down the stairs, he doesn't smell the usual feast jay would prepare them: eggs, bacon, toast, orange juice and cereal for jake since he claims, "it doesn't hurt his tummy," (his words).

he actually doesn't see jake. nor sunghoon, sunoo, jungwon, jay, winter, yuqi, or keeho.

after last nights events, he expected not to see riki as he was probably with you.

how did he go from having the girl of his dreams sitting on his lap, to making her hate him even more?

it's simple, really: he fucked up.

he moves through the house like a ghost — rooms too quiet, air too still. no laughter, no music playing off someone’s phone. just him and the rain.

the basement still has the blanket you’d curled up with last night. your mug — half full. he picks it up, and it’s cold. like him.

he tries to call riki. no answer.

he tries to call you.

it goes straight to voicemail.

he types out a text. deletes it. tries again.

“i didn’t mean what i said. i didn’t mean to hurt you. i'm sorry, y/n”

he stares at it. sends it.

and immediately regrets it. because what if you never answer?

as he packs up all his belongings, ready for the uncomfortable drive home, someone enters the house.

heeseung's heart rate picks up. what if it's you? he bolts down the stairs and is ultimately disappointed when he's met with a very disapproving jay.

they stand across from one another, staring into each others eyes.

heeseung's the first to break. he collapses on the bar stool at the counter and drops his head into his hands like it weighs a ton.

jay just sighs and sits down next to his friend.

"is she okay?" heeseung mumbles, his face buried in his hands.

jay’s jaw tightens. "why do you care?" he snaps. "you sure as hell didn’t last night when you said you could never love someone like her."

the words hit hard — harder than jay intended — and heeseung shatters.

the sobs break out of him like a dam giving way, loud and raw. tears stream down his face, and the sound of it makes jay flinch, caught off guard by how real the pain is. how broken heeseung suddenly looks.

still, jay moves without thinking, reaching out and rubbing slow circles on his friend’s back. it doesn’t fix anything, but it softens the edges of the moment.

they sit there in silence, the storm outside echoing the one inside, as heeseung cries himself hoarse.

by the time he’s able to breathe steadily again, nearly an hour has passed. his eyes are red, his voice barely there. he lifts his head and meets jay’s gaze; tired looking into just as tired.

neither of them says much. there’s no need.

finally, jay sighs and stands. “go grab your stuff,” he says quietly. “you’re in no shape to drive. i’ll take you home.”

heeseung doesn’t argue.

because for once, he knows jay’s right.

───

your phone dings.

dni: i didn't mean what i said. i didn't mean to hurt you. i'm sorry, y/n

you stare at your phone. gaze void of emotion. you've cried out everything you could muster.

you don't even know why heeseung's words echo in your head.

were you really that intolerable to be around? surely you weren't. all of heeseung's friends enjoyed hanging out with you and same with your little group.

so why did hearing your supposed enemy say he could never love someone like you hurt so bad?

you suppose you need to distract yourself from thinking that heeseung's words have any sort of impact on you. and that's when your door swings open. riki, yuqi, winter, keeho, sunghoon, jake, sunoo, and jungwon walk into your apartment with food, video games, board games, coloring books, skincare — everything you needed at the moment.

a break.

a break from your spiraling thoughts and endless questions you didn't want answered.

there's a knock at the door, jay comes in after he dropped heeseung off, with a freshly made cake, red velvet. your favorite.

you don’t move at first.

the warmth of your friends floods the apartment — laughter, chatter, the familiar rustle of takeout bags and the buzz of game controllers syncing. but it feels distant, like you’re underwater, watching from behind a thick pane of glass.

yuqi wraps her arms around you from behind, cheek resting on your shoulder. “we got your favorite pork buns,” she says softly.

you nod. you don’t trust your voice.

riki’s the one who notices your phone still clutched in your hand. screen glowing. that message. his message.

he doesn’t say anything, but he takes the phone from you gently, pressing the lock button, letting the screen fade to black. and you’re grateful. because if you kept staring at it, you might’ve started crying again, and you didn’t think you had anything left in you.

“movie?” sunghoon offers, holding up a stack of dvd's none of you ever returned to the library.

“coloring?” sunoo chirps, already spreading out gel pens across your coffee table.

“face masks?” winter insists, already tearing them open.

you let them distract you. you let them love you in the only way they know how — loudly, messily, unconditionally.

there’s a moment, in the middle of the chaos, when keeho makes a stupid joke and jungwon snorts soda out of his nose, that you laugh. actually laugh.

and then it hits you like whiplash — how easily heeseung could’ve been here. how almost close you came to letting yourself believe there was something soft behind his smirks and eye rolls. how you’d dared to hope that maybe, just maybe, the tension between you wasn’t just one-sided delusion.

but then he said it. “i could never love someone like her.”

and even with the people you love surrounding you, something in your chest hurts. like a bruise that won’t stop blooming.

later, after everyone’s settled into pillows and half-finished coloring pages, riki sits beside you. he doesn’t speak for a long time.

then, quietly, “you don’t have to pretend around me.”

and that’s when your lip trembles. just slightly.

“i don’t know why it hurts this much,” you whisper. “i knew he hated me. i knew. so why do i feel so broken?"

“he didn’t have to say it like that,” riki replies, voice firm. “he didn’t have to break something just because he couldn’t admit he wanted to hold it.”

you nod, finally letting a single tear trail down your cheek. riki wipes it away before it can fall too far.

he squeezes your hand.

“he messed up,” he says. “that’s on him. not you.”

you hold onto that — his words, their presence, the comfort of being chosen and cared for.

and for the first time since last night, you breathe. not easily. not painlessly. but it’s a start.

───

heeseung didn't know how hard it would be to try and get any information about you.

how you were doing, if you were okay. anything

your mutual friends? after hearing how massive he fucked up, they sided with you.

sure, jay, jake, sunghoon, sunoo, and jungwon would text him and hang out with him occasionally, but they wouldn't utter a word about you. most of the time heeseung saw them, it would be for awkward movie nights or when they would game together when none of them could sleep.

when he was alone, his mind ached, his chest twisted in pain, but mostly... his body ached.

he tried to stop it, he knew it was wrong.

but when you sat on his lap, something in him shifted.

sure he knew you were pretty (breathtakingly stunning), but he never imagined something he thought about constantly would ever become reality.

he thought back to those 5 minutes. the tension. surely it couldn't have just been made up in his head, right?

the way your entire body tensed when his hands rested on your hips. normally he wouldn't have touched you, but you were shifting and he needed to stop his growing problem before you noticed.

and thankfully it worked.

however, he was already hard as a brick.

his breath hitched as he remembered the look in your eyes — uncertain, but not scared. curious, maybe? or was he projecting again?

he swallowed hard, his hands now clenched at his sides like if he let them loose, they’d betray him again.

five minutes. that’s all it was. but it looped in his head like a damn broken record.

you hadn’t said a word. but your thighs had tensed. and when he shifted, trying to regain his composure, you hadn't moved away — not immediately, anyway.

maybe it meant nothing. maybe you hadn’t even noticed the way his breath had gone shallow or the way he was holding back like his life depended on it.

but god, his body remembered.

he shifted in his bed now, alone, frustrated, angry at himself. this wasn’t who he was supposed to be. he wasn’t supposed to want this — to want you — not like this. not in silence, not in secrecy, not in pain.

but the damage was already done.

and the worst part?

he wasn’t sure he even wanted to stop anymore.

as he stared at his chase atlantic posters, he thought to himself. any guy would get hard when a pretty girl sits on his lap, right? surely it isn't just because he's a pathetic virgin who's had to lie to his entire friend group about how he "gets around."

soon enough, his thoughts were interrupted by the rapidly increasing ache between his legs.

his hands trembled slightly as they hovered over the tent in his shorts. his breathing was shallow, lips parted, eyes half-lidded as if he were caught in some fever dream he didn’t want to wake up from.

he hated how much he needed this.

how much he needed you.

with a low, strangled groan, he finally gave in, palming himself over the thin fabric. the relief was immediate, but it wasn’t enough — it never was. not when the ache ran deeper than just skin. not when every nerve in his body was screaming for more.

he slipped his hand beneath his waistband, hissing through clenched teeth as his fingers wrapped around his thick length, already twitching with need. he was so hard it hurt, painfully stiff and dripping at the tip, slicking his palm almost instantly.

your name burned on his tongue, but he swallowed it back.

he couldn’t say it. shouldn’t say it.

but in his head, it echoed over and over again. your laugh. your voice. the way you looked at him — or didn’t. the way you moved. god, he remembered everything. he was haunted by it.

he shut his eyes tight and let his hand move — slow at first, starting at his base and dragging his fingers up each vein decorating the sides. his patience wore out quicker than he'd ever admit, starting to move up his length, then down with just enough pressure to make his thighs twitch. he bit his lip, hard, trying to hold in the sounds. but as the memory of you shifting in his lap played behind his eyelids like a cruel fantasy, a soft whimper escaped.

he was losing it.

desperation clawed at him with every stroke, every flex of his hand. his hips lifted off the mattress as his muscles tensed. he imagined your fingers replacing his, your body hovering over his, your breath against his neck.

“please,” he gasped into the dark — not even sure what he was begging for. forgiveness? permission? you?

he pumped harder now, faster, chasing that high like it would save him. his other hand gripped the sheets, knuckles white. he was right on the edge, falling apart with nothing but the echo of your presence and the throb of need coiled deep in his belly.

“i need — fuck, i need you,” he moaned, broken and breathless. his body was hot, slick with sweat, twitching under his own touch.

he could feel it. the band threatening to snap at any moment.

he swirled his fingers around his tip, hitting that spot that made his vision go white. he was close.

all it took to unravel him was an image of you, mouth replacing his hand. trying to fit as much of him into your mouth while he just laid there and took it.

eventually the thought was too much, his seed spilled over his stomach in thick, messy ropes, his fist slowing only when the aftershocks wracked his frame like a wave of guilt and pleasure colliding all at once.

he laid there for a moment, chest heaving, skin flushed and sticky.

and then it hit him.

he still wasn’t satisfied.

because it wasn’t your touch. it wasn’t your voice, your kiss, your heat. it was just his hand and a fantasy he couldn't let go of.

and no matter how many times he did this, no matter how many times he used the memory of you…

it was never going to be enough.

───

you’ve held it together for as long as you could — smiled through movie nights, laughed at keeho’s stupid impressions, even ate something other than ramen yesterday. but it’s all surface level. the moment you're alone again, the cracks split wide open.

there you are, sitting on your couch, drowning in your thoughts. 

the faint glow of the streetlamp filters through the windows, further highlighting the text message staring back at you

“i didn’t mean it.” 

it replays in your head over and over like a broken record until your vision starts to blur. tears flood your waterline but you make no effort to stop them. 

you don’t sob. you just sit there, hurting so quietly it’s almost peaceful.

until it isn’t. 

your lip trembles slightly, then it all comes pouring out. 

“why? why did you say that? what the fuck. did i do to deserve those words?” 

riki hears your quiet words from the bathroom. he comes rushing out, empathy and sadness twirling in his eyes. 

“hey, hey, hey, talk to me y/n. yell at me if you need to, yeah?” he says. voice barely above a whisper. all you can choke out is a tiny “no, none of this is your fault.” 

riki sits next to you, holding you, trying to piece you back together as if he were the one who broke you.

disrupting the mellow silence lingering in your apartment, there’s a knock at the door.

not wanting the worst case scenario, you answering the door to heeseung, riki gets up and makes his way to where the sound came from. 

to both of your dismay, a tired heeseung stands in the doorway. 

his hair is messy, dark bags under his usually teasing eyes, looking like he hasn’t slept in days.

he freezes when he sees you. your puffy eyes, shaking hands, the way you curl in on yourself like you’re trying to disappear. 

riki steps in front of you, but you give him the signal to back down. you and heeseung can handle this alone. what’s another argument anyways? 

as riki walks away, heeseung starts slowly “yn…” 

you look at him. and no matter how hard you could have tried, nothing could have stopped you from snapping at him.

“why are you here?”  “i had to see you. i had to say–”  “you already said enough, heeseung.” 

god. the way you say his name. all he’s thought about since you last saw each other was you saying his name. and now, he doesn’t wanna hear it ever again. 

he opens his mouth to speak, but you beat him to it. 

“do you know what it felt like to hear you say i wasn’t lovable? that someone like me could never be enough for you?” 

as if you could read his mind, you shake your head, dismissing whatever he was about to spit out. 

with every last ounce of energy you can gather, you scream. “you don’t get to feel sorry now. you made your choice the other night. i knew we had a mutual hatred, or at least some twisted distaste, but i never even thought about saying something like that to you.”

he doesn’t respond right away. just stands there, frozen. then you hear it. soft sniffles. ragged breathing. sobs.

he breaks.

because this is the first time he gets it. really, truly understands what he did. what he said. what it cost you.

“i’m sorry,” he chokes out, voice cracked and barely audible. “truly. what i said last week… i didn’t mean it. even thinking it broke me.”

you stare at him for a long, quiet second. and then you say it — flat, but shaking.

“you broke me first, heeseung.”

his breath catches. your words land like a punch to the gut, because they’re the truth. maybe the first truth spoken between you in a long time.

heeseung, who’s always so calm. so composed. the one who rolls his eyes at everything and makes everything feel like a joke. he’s crumbling in front of you now. not fighting. not defending. just falling apart.

and then it hits you. maybe he’s always been like this.

watching you. listening. never the first to strike, only ever the one to react. maybe he was never the villain in this story.

your breath hitches. maybe, just maybe, you were wrong.

you don’t know why the realization crashes down now. maybe it’s the sound of his sobs. maybe it’s the way the silence has more weight than anything he’s ever said. but something inside you shifts.

and for the first time, you see him — not as the enemy. but as the boy who let you hate him, because he didn’t know how to ask for anything else.

you replay every argument like a tape stuck on rewind. you were always the one who started it.

the snide comments. the sideways glances. the venom you dressed up as jokes.

heeseung never really fought back. he always matched your energy, sure, but he never escalated it. never crossed a line. not until that night.

your chest tightens. you realize you don’t even remember what the first fight was about. some hallway bump? a misunderstood glance? maybe it was never about anything. maybe it was just you, projecting every piece of your brokenness onto the only person who saw through it and stayed.

god, had he always stayed?

you remember in elementary school, how he used to bring you extra snacks when you forgot lunch. how he gave you his hoodie that one time you were shivering during morning assembly, even after you’d spent the entire week roasting him in front of your friends.

you remember the way his gaze always lingered—not in a way that felt invasive, but like he was always checking. watching over you without saying a word.

and now here he is. slumped into his knees. back pressed against the wall, crying over you.

you were so busy building walls with your bitterness that you didn’t notice it was slowly breaking him. 

the quiet way he tried to reach over them.

you sink to the floor across from him, not close enough to touch, but close enough to feel the weight of everything between you.

for a long moment, you don’t speak. neither does he. you just breathe in the silence together — like it’s the only language you both understand.

“i didn’t know how to stop hating you,” you whisper, voice catching. “because if i stopped… i think i would’ve started needing you.”

heeseung lifts his head. eyes red, lashes wet.

“i already did,” he says. “i never stopped.”

your heart fractures in a way that doesn’t feel sharp, just tired. heavy.

“i don’t know what to do with that,” you admit.

“you don’t have to do anything,” he murmurs. “not tonight.”

you nod. once. then you help him get up. both your legs feel numb, but you walk him towards the door. your hand rests on the handle, taking a second to look up at him. really look at him, and you’re tempted to say something. 

but instead, you give him the quietest thing you can offer: a small, broken sort of smile. not quite forgiveness. not quite goodbye.

then, he steps out into the night. and just like that, the quietness of everything settling in takes over. no more lies. just the truth.

as you’re deep in thought, riki walks in with two mugs of hot chocolate — extra marshmallows, your favorite. 

-ˏˋ⋆ 3 years ago ⋆ˊˎ-  

it’s a chilly summer night. you and riki are sprawled out on the roof of his parents' house, the shingles warm beneath your backs from the day’s lingering sun. crickets hum below. the stars blink overhead, careless and constant.

you shift slightly, seeking warmth, and without a word, riki lifts his arm. you curl into the space beside him, head on his shoulder, fingers tucked into the sleeve of his hoodie. his arm settles around you like it belongs there.

“do you think we’ll ever feel like this again?” you murmur. “peaceful. like nothing’s wrong.”

he hums low in his chest. “you mean without chaos or boys who don’t deserve you?”

you let out a breath, half a laugh. “exactly.”

there’s a pause, the kind that feels thick with unspoken things.

riki’s voice is soft when he finally speaks. “i think… the people who make you feel heavy, like you're constantly questioning yourself, that’s not love, y/n. that’s something else.”

you turn your face slightly to look up at him. he’s gazing at the stars like he’s afraid of admitting he craves the one thing he’s always sworn to never care about. 

“love should never hurt,” he says, quieter this time. “not the kind that stays.”

you don’t say anything right away. you’re too busy memorizing the way the night folds around his words. the way he’s always been a comfort for you, the one to pick you up when you’re falling. 

and in that moment, you believe him. you really do.

you nod once. “then i hope… when it’s my turn, it feels like this. safe.”

riki swallows. “me too.”

-ˏˋ⋆ present time ⋆ˊˎ- 

and now, back in your bedroom, the silence left in heeseung’s absence is deafening.

your gaze flicks toward the window, rain still threading down the glass like tear tracks. your mind lingers on that rooftop — the stars, the safety, the version of you who still believed in soft things.

before all the hook-ups, parties, and one-sided confessions. 

you pull the blanket tighter around your shoulders and whisper. either to riki or yourself, you don’t know.

“you said love should never hurt. i think heeseung missed that memo.”

and god, how you wish you could go back to that night — before the spiral, before the ache.

before the boy who made you feel like an afterthought.

before you let yourself fall over someone you thought you didn’t care about. 

riki leaves after making sure you’re alright, mumbling something about dance practice. 

and again, it’s just you. in the quiet. 

then, almost without thinking, you rip a blank piece of paper out of your journal.

you don’t plan it. it’s just instinct — fingers gripping your pen, waiting for permission your heart hasn’t quite given. but then you start writing.

dear heeseung,

i hated you before i knew how badly i could want you. maybe that’s where it all went wrong. because at some point, i stopped seeing you as the boy who annoyed me and started seeing you as someone i wanted to understand. as someone i wanted to look at me and see me. and for a while, i thought maybe you did. i thought maybe the way you pulled me into your lap, the way you whispered near my ear, the way your hand rested on my waist — i thought maybe it meant something. i thought i was stupid for hating you. turns out i was just stupid for hoping. you said you could never love someone like me. and god, that broke something in me i didn’t know was still whole. because even when i told myself i hated you, there was always that small, traitorous part of me that wondered: what if he doesn’t hate me back? what if it’s more? but it wasn’t. and now i can’t unhear it. you probably didn’t even mean it — not in the way it came out. maybe it was fear, or pressure, or ego. but it doesn’t matter, does it? words don’t get erased just because we didn’t mean them. they echo. and yours… yours are still echoing inside me like a song i can’t shut off. i don’t think i’m mad at you anymore. i think i’m mad at myself. for letting you get close. for not guarding the parts of me i only let out in small doses. for thinking i was different to you. i wish you hadn’t said it. but mostly, i wish it hadn’t mattered so much to me that you did. – y/n

you take out an envelope, neatly fold the paper and stuff it inside, writing a neat ‘heeseung’ on the front of it. 

some truths aren’t meant to be sent. some confessions are only meant for the rain to witness.

and tonight, that’s enough.

───

the second the door shuts behind him, the silence hits like a punch to the ribs.

heeseung stands there for a second too long, staring at the wood grain of your door like it might open again. like maybe you’ll come running after him. like maybe that small, broken smile you gave him wasn’t the end.

but it doesn’t open.

and it was the end.

he starts walking. he doesn’t even remember moving his feet, just that suddenly he’s outside, and the rain greets him like an old friend. cold, sharp, unforgiving. it soaks through his hoodie in seconds, but he doesn’t flinch.

he deserves it. every drop. every chill. every echo of your voice in his head.

“not quite forgiveness. not quite goodbye.”

god, what did he do?

how did he take someone who was literally sitting in his lap, trusting him with the fragile thread of something real — and turn that into this? this mess of silence and space and words he can’t take back?

“i could never love someone like her.”

he had said it so carelessly. so cruelly. trying to deflect the attention off himself in front of your friends, like a coward. like a boy who still thinks protecting his ego is worth more than protecting a heart.

especially your heart.

he wipes his face with the back of his hand, unsure if it’s tears or rain. it’s probably both.

he thinks back to your eyes right before he left. the way you looked at him like he was someone you used to know. like whatever thread was between you had finally snapped.

and the worst part?

he couldn’t even beg you to stay.

because he knows — he knows — he doesn’t deserve it.

he walks home in silence, the city around him buzzing and breathing like it doesn’t care at all about the wreckage inside his chest. his phone buzzes a few times in his pocket, probably jay or jungwon checking if he made it back safely.

but none of it matters.

because there’s only one person he wants to hear from.

and you’ve already said everything you needed to say. in the way you didn’t ask him to stay. in the way you didn’t cry. in the way you simply closed the door.

so when heeseung finally steps into his apartment, soaked to the bone, trembling from more than just the cold, he collapses on his bed, stares at the ceiling, and whispers:

“i didn’t mean it. i swear i didn’t mean it.”

but there’s no one left to listen.

not tonight.

───

heeseung isn’t the center of your world anymore.

not in the way he used to be.

in the weeks that follow, your friends become your anchor. riki never leaves your side. winter brings over matcha lattes and blankets. sunoo paints your nails while jake tells bad jokes. you laugh again. slowly, but surely.

you start writing more letters.

some are angry. some are soft. some are nothing more than wordless scratches of ink on paper.

but one night, you write a letter that feels different.

you don’t even realize what you’re saying until it’s already down:

i wanted you. for a long time. maybe even when i said i hated you. maybe that was the only way i knew how to say it without crumbling. i masked want with rage. affection with sarcasm. love with loathing. you made it easier to run. but i wanted to stay. god, i wanted to stay.

you fold that letter gently. tuck it into your drawer. it doesn’t matter if he reads it. not now.

because healing isn’t about him.

it’s about you.

and you’re getting there.

lately, the weekends have felt lighter. your apartment has become a familiar gathering place again, only now, it’s just the people who stayed. who showed up. who chose you. heeseung hasn’t come around in weeks, and no one really talks about it. not in a cruel way, just in the quiet, understanding way that friendships shift when someone slips out of the picture.

you used to dread saturday nights, used to flinch every time the group chat lit up with plans. used to wonder if he’d show up, if you’d have to spend the night pretending not to notice the weight of his silence, the way your laughter dulled around him. but somewhere along the way, those nights started to feel easier. not because you stopped missing him — but because you started remembering how to miss him without hurting yourself in the process.

your living room is alive with warmth and laughter. the scent of popcorn and mango smoothies drifts through the air. blankets are piled high on the couch, soft pillows strewn across the floor where riki is dramatically throwing himself down after losing yet another round of mario kart to sunghoon, who’s grinning like he just won the olympics.

“cheater,” riki groans, pointing an accusing finger without lifting his head.

“just admit i’m better,” sunghoon replies smugly, stretching his legs across the coffee table like he owns the place.

in the corner, winter and yuqi are dancing barefoot to a chaotic mix of early 2000s pop and indie throwbacks — somehow still synced up to choreography you’d all made up back in sophomore year. their laughter is contagious, unfiltered and bright, and it tugs a smile onto your face before you even realize it.

keeho is halfway through teaching jungwon and sunoo a tiktok dance in the kitchen doorway, voice loud and arms flailing with exaggerated energy. they’re laughing too hard to get the moves right, collapsing into each other every time they mess up. jake, unfazed by the chaos, is blending something suspiciously green in the kitchen, wearing a headband that reads “chef vibes only.”

you’re curled up on the loveseat, blanket wrapped around your shoulders, a half-finished smoothie in your hands. and for once, you’re not scanning the room for him. you’re not wondering what he’d say or how he’d look at you or if tonight would be the night he pulled you aside and finally said something real.

you’re just… here. and it’s enough.

someone throws a pillow at your head, probably riki, based on the cackling, and you lunge to retaliate, laughing as the pillow war erupts across the living room. it’s messy, loud, ridiculous. and it’s yours. this little world you’re rebuilding, one laugh, one night, one breath at a time.

there’s still a part of you that misses him. maybe there always will be. but tonight, that part is small. quiet.

outnumbered by joy.

meanwhile, heeseung is alone in his apartment.

the place is dim. quiet. it hasn’t felt like home in a long time. he's been staring at his phone for an hour now, hoping for a text that doesn’t come.

he thinks about the group chat. the silence from everyone. he thinks about the night he ruined everything. and how, somehow, he still wants to fix it.

he knows an apology isn’t enough. not this time.

he needs to show you, all of you, that he’s not the same guy who let his fear speak louder than his heart.

he just doesn’t know how yet.

but he will. he has to.

because he doesn’t just want forgiveness.

he wants to deserve it.

───

somewhere in the chaos, one of your unsent letters goes missing.

riki finds it by accident. tucked under a cushion, edges worn. he doesn't mean to read it, but your handwriting draws him in, and before he knows it, he's holding your heartbreak in his hands.

he doesn't say a word. just slips it into his pocket and walks away.

a day later, heeseung finds the letter folded on the seat of his car.

he doesn’t recognize the paper at first. but the second he sees your handwriting, his heart drops.

his hands shake as he unfolds it. the silence around him is so loud, he can hear his pulse in his ears.

and then he reads it.

every word. every line. every raw, aching truth you never meant for him to see.

i thought maybe the way you pulled me into your lap, the way you whispered near my ear, the way your hand rested on my waist — i thought maybe it meant something. turns out i was just stupid for hoping. you said you could never love someone like me. and god, that broke something in me i didn’t know was still whole.

heeseung sits there, completely still. letter trembling in his grip.

"fuck," he whispers. "fuck."

he shows up to the next group hangout like his life depends on it.

he doesn’t talk to anyone. not really. not until you walk in.

you freeze when you see him. part of you wants to turn around and leave.

but he doesn’t let you.

he stands. crosses the room.

"can we talk?" he asks, voice low, not demanding, but pleading.

you don’t say anything.

"please. just five minutes. if you still hate me after, i’ll leave you alone. forever."

there’s a long pause.

you nod.

he takes you outside, away from the noise, into the quiet night.

"i read it," he says.

you blink. "read what?"

he reaches into his jacket and pulls out the letter. your letter.

your stomach drops.

"i wasn’t supposed to see it, i know. but... i’m glad i did."

"heeseung—"

"no. let me say this. please."

his eyes are desperate. glassy. his words shaky.

"i lied. that night. i said that because i was scared. because i felt too much, too fast, and didn’t know what to do with it. i thought if i pushed you away, i could kill whatever it was before it killed me."

he takes a step closer.

"but you weren’t just someone i hated. not really. you were someone i couldn’t stop thinking about. you were the highlight of every party, every night, every moment. i was an idiot. but i never stopped wanting you."

your throat is tight.

"you broke me," you whisper.

he nods.

"i know. and i’ll spend every second proving to you that i’m sorry. not with words — with time. with actions. with everything you’ll let me give."

there’s silence.

then you take a breath.

"you’ve got a lot to prove, lee heeseung."

he gives the smallest, hopeful smile.

"then let me start now."

and he does.

not with fireworks. not with promises he can’t keep. but with the small things. the consistent things.

the next morning, there’s a text from him. simple. 

“did you sleep okay?”

you stare at it for a while before replying. 

“yeah. you?” 

“not really. kept thinking about you.”

you don’t answer that. but your heart stirs anyway.

a few days later, he’s waiting outside your class with a drink in his hand, the one he used to make fun of you for ordering (“that’s basically sugar and foam, y/n”), but now buys without hesitation. he doesn’t try to walk you home. doesn’t push. just hands you the drink, offers a soft “you looked tired,” and walks away before you can respond.

he lets you come to him.

at the next hangout, he doesn’t hover. doesn’t sulk. he helps jake in the kitchen, jokes with jungwon, lets the others tease him without biting back. when you walk in, his eyes find you — but he doesn’t pull you aside. just offers a quiet, careful smile. like he’s waiting. like he’s learning how to stay.

one night, you’re struggling with your laundry, balancing way too many bags and a basket of unfolded clothes, and he appears without a word, grabbing half the load from your arms. you glare at him, but you don’t tell him to stop.

he walks with you to the laundry room, helps you separate colors, folds your towels when you’re too tired to finish. “i owe you way more than this,” he says softly. you don’t look at him. “yeah,” you murmur. “you do.”

he doesn’t reply. just keeps folding.

you start to notice it more after that. the way he lingers behind after group dinners to help clean. the way he listens, really listens, when you talk, even if it’s just about the books you’re reading or the music you’ve been into lately. the way he starts learning your rhythms again, not to manipulate them, but to respect them.

one night, you find a note slipped into your bag.

“this isn’t about getting you back. it’s about being someone who deserves to stand beside you. i don’t expect anything from you. just… thanks for letting me try.”

you don’t know what to do with that. but you keep the note anyway.

and maybe the biggest moment doesn’t feel big at all. it’s late. you’re sitting on the floor of your apartment, overwhelmed with everything—assignments, memories, feelings you’ve tried to ignore—and he shows up.

he doesn’t say anything. just sits beside you. close, but not too close. his shoulder brushes yours. your hand trembles. and without looking at you, he says, “you don’t have to talk. just let me sit here.”

and you do.

because he’s not trying to fix you. he’s just showing up. and maybe that’s what love looks like now.

quiet. patient. real.

you don’t forgive him all at once.

but some nights, it’s harder to pretend you don’t want to.

like the night it rains, and you forget your umbrella. you’re standing under the campus archway, clutching your books to your chest, half-considering just running for it, when a quiet voice says, “hey.”

you turn. heeseung’s holding out his umbrella, expression unreadable, hair already wet from the walk over.

“you’ll get soaked,” you mumble, surprised. “i don’t mind,” he says. “but you hate the rain.”

you want to tell him to leave. want to remind him that knowing those things doesn’t mean he’s forgiven.

but instead, you step under the umbrella. shoulder to shoulder. hearts too close. you don’t say a word the whole walk home. but you remember how he always matched his pace to yours. he still does.

───

there’s another time. movie night.

everyone’s over again, sprawled across the living room. you end up between yuqi and jungwon on the couch, but at some point, someone moves, and when you shift, you realize you’re next to him. again.

the movie plays. people whisper and pass snacks and argue over the plot twist. but all you feel is the space between your knee and his. the ghost of warmth where your arms nearly brush.

you don’t move away. neither does he.

and at one point, you laugh at a stupid scene. without thinking, you glance at him, wanting to see if he found it funny too. he’s already looking at you. and for a second, everything stills.

you look away first. but your heart doesn't stop racing for a long, long time.

───

the third moment is softest of all.

it’s late. everyone’s left. you’re cleaning up alone, stacking plates in the kitchen.

you don’t hear him come back until he’s beside you, rolling up his sleeves.

“thought i’d help,” he says gently. you nod. don’t speak.

you’re both quiet for a while, working in sync. something about it feels… familiar. domestic. like home.

then, as you’re drying the last cup, you glance over. he’s watching you, and there’s something in his eyes. something tender. careful. full of things he hasn’t said yet.

“i miss you,” he says softly. 

your breath catches.

you set the cup down.

“heeseung–”

“i’m not asking for anything,” he interrupts, voice thick. “just… i miss you. and i wanted you to know.”

you swallow hard. there’s so much you could say. but instead, you whisper, “i know.”

he nods once. and then he leaves. because he meant it — he wasn’t asking for anything. but that’s the moment you know: you don’t hate him anymore. you never did. 

───

it happens a week later.

a rooftop. stars overhead. winter’s birthday, most of your friends are tipsy on alcohol, sugar and too many karaoke songs. you haven’t had a drop of alcohol, wanting to truly feel everything.

heeseung finds you leaning against the railing, eyes on the sky.

“hey,” he says. you nod and let him stand beside you.

the silence isn’t awkward anymore. it’s soft. steady.

“can i ask you something?” he says, barely audible.

you hum.

“do you still feel it?” he asks. “whatever it was… whatever we had.”

you don’t answer for a long time.

and then, quietly… “i never really stopped.”

he turns. slowly.

your eyes meet. and in them is every apology he’s ever whispered with his actions. every moment he gave you space. every time he showed up when he didn’t have to.

you reach for him first.

your hand brushes his. his fingers curl around yours like a prayer.

and then, finally, he kisses you.

soft. aching. full of every unspoken word, every almost, every could’ve been. this isn’t the kind of kiss that demands anything. it’s a promise. a beginning.

you pull back first, just enough to whisper, “i don’t wanna do this while you’re intoxicated, i don’t want you to regret it.” 

he stares at you before mumbling into your lips.

“y/n, i haven’t had a drink, but it feels like i’m drunk when i kiss you.” 

your heart stops and everything fades into the background. “don’t break me again.” you plead, face inches away from his. 

he presses his forehead to yours.

“never again,” he breathes.

and this time, you believe him.

as he reconnects your lips, his hands tremble slightly where they find purchase on your waist. the night air is cool, but your skin is burning—flushed, alive, and aching in a way you haven’t let yourself feel in so long.

he pulls back just enough to look at you. his eyes flick between yours and your lips, like he’s still not sure this is real.

“we don’t have to,” he murmurs, voice hoarse. “just say the word.”

but you don’t want him to stop. not tonight. not after everything.

so you slide your fingers into the collar of his jacket, tug him closer until your lips brush his again.

“take me home, heeseung.”

and he does.

his apartment is quiet when you get inside, the chaos of the earlier party gone, the night still humming with something electric. you barely have time to kick your shoes off before his mouth finds yours again. hungrier now, more desperate. like all the restraint he’s shown is unraveling, thread by thread.

his hands are everywhere — your hips, your waist, your jaw. like he’s relearning you. memorizing the weight of you against him.

you tug his jacket off, fingers fumbling with the zipper, and he lets out a low, breathless laugh against your neck.

“still impatient,” he teases.

“still hot when you shut up,” you shoot back, and he groans.

you barely make it to the couch.

he sits first, pulling you into his lap like it’s instinct, like he’s needed this for months. your knees straddle him, bodies pressed chest to chest, your hands tangled in his hair as he kisses you like he’s starving for it.

he tilts his head, deepens the kiss, and it’s filthy. slow. wet. your hips roll against his without thinking, and the noise he makes, low and guttural, goes straight to your core.

“fuck,” he groans. forehead against your collarbone. “you’re gonna kill me.”

you arch into him, tug his shirt over his head, and he follows suit, fingers slipping under the hem of yours, eyes flicking up for permission. you nod, and he peels it off slowly, reverently, like unwrapping something precious.

his hands trail over your skin like he’s trying to remember what it feels like to deserve you.

and then his mouth is on your neck, your shoulder, trailing down until you’re gasping his name, your back arching as he presses kisses across your collarbones.

“you’re so beautiful,” he whispers, like it hurts.

as you reach for his belt wanting to make him feel good, he puts his hand over yours. “there’s something i need to tell you.. before we take anything further.” he says like he doesn’t even want you to know. 

“what is it, hee?” 

god. that nickname. 

it’s what all his close friends call him, however when you say it. he wants to lay the world at your feet. 

“i’m.. uh– a vir-virgin…” he mumbles. you would have missed it had you not been paying close attention. 

you laugh. 

heeseung leans back into the couch, hoping, praying, wishing it to swallow him whole. 

as you observe heeseung, you realize he must be serious. “you’re a virgin? but you– you always used to talk about your hook-ups and how every week it was like you had someone new hanging off your arm??? what do you mean you’re a virgin?” 

he whimpers. he fucking whimpers. “i’m not proud of it, okay? i always came really close to hooking up with girls but i um. i couldn’t you know.. get it… up.” 

you sit there quietly, giving him time to compose himself and continue. 

“everytime i tried to lose my virginity, i couldn’t get hard unless i thought she was you,” he speaks, not gaining enough courage to look you in the eyes. 

you stare at heeseung for a moment, trying to process what he just said. the weight of it settles between you like a delicate secret, and suddenly the playful teasing tone you’d had before feels completely inappropriate.

you can see it in his doe eyes — how embarrassed he is, how much he wants to crawl out of his own skin. the corners of his lips are tugged in a tight line, as if holding in every emotion that threatens to spill out. but you can’t help the smile that creeps onto your face. it’s soft, gentle, but laced with a teasing warmth.

“you’re a virgin?” you ask, letting the words linger a little longer than they should, pretending to be surprised as if he hadn’t just told you, twice.

heeseung’s face reddens, and you see him shrink further into the couch. you could almost feel his desire to hide, to escape. but you don’t let him. instead, you move closer, shifting between his legs, and place your hand on his thigh. a gentle, reassuring pressure.

“god, heeseung,” you tease softly, your lips curling into a smile that isn’t cruel, but playful. “how could you keep that from me? you’ve been all… big talk and ‘i get all the girls,’ and here you are, this nervous little thing, blushing at the thought of being with me?”

his eyes flicker with uncertainty, but you lean in just enough to press your lips to his ear. you feel him tense under the touch, and the subtle shiver runs through his body, telling you everything you need to know. he’s not as confident as he makes it seem.

“you should’ve told me sooner, you know,” you whisper, your voice low, just enough to make his breath hitch. “i would’ve been patient. we could’ve taken it slow.”

heeseung groans softly, his hands gripping the fabric of the couch like he’s holding onto some semblance of control. you smile knowingly, watching the struggle on his face. but it’s not discomfort — it’s desire. you can feel it in the way his eyes refuse to leave yours, in the way his body reacts to the gentleness in your touch.

“i… i don’t want you to think less of me,” he mutters, barely audible, but you catch it anyway. “it’s just… with you, it’s always felt different.”

you gently trace your fingers up his chest, watching as his breath quickens. you’re giving him space to breathe, to process, and then you lean in, brushing your lips against his in a soft, teasing kiss.

“stop worrying about that,” you say quietly, your lips just barely touching his. “i don’t think less of you. if anything, you’re hotter right now than ever before.”

the vulnerability in his eyes shifts. he’s still nervous, but the weight is lifting. and for the first time in a while, you see him start to believe that he doesn’t need to hide anything from you.

then, you shift your focus, teasing him once more with a playful grin. “but you know, heeseung… i could help you with that. we could take this slow, maybe help you get comfortable with what it feels like to be with me. you trust me, don’t you?”

he nods, slowly, not trusting his voice. he’s ready. maybe more than he thought.

and you take that as your cue. you kiss him again, deeper this time, letting the heat between you grow. his body responds to you almost immediately. hands shifting from nervous to eager, pulling you closer as his mouth moves hungrily against yours.

“let me take care of you,” you murmur, your hands trailing down to his belt. this time, you don’t hesitate. you undo it slowly, giving him time to react, but he doesn’t stop you. instead, he leans back into the couch, chest rising and falling with each shallow breath.

heeseung’s eyes search yours one more time, a silent question in them. you nod gently, giving him permission to be vulnerable, to trust you fully.

and when your hands pull his pants down, you can feel the heat of him, see the evidence of his desire. you take your time, enjoying the way he reacts to each touch, savoring the way he trembles under your hands.

you start by rubbing over his bulge when your eyes widen. 

he just stares back at you, not blinking, but incredibly nervous. “is– is something wrong?” he stutters out. 

“wrong? no, heeseung. you’re huge.” 

he blushes and hides his face in his hands. his veiny hands. you’ll definitely need to put those to use later. 

you softly drag his hands away from his face and tell him to never hide from you. you think he’s beautiful like this. 

after he calms down, you look back into his eyes that resemble a deer, and he nods. signaling you to continue. 

you finally trail your eyes down to his raging hard on, you can almost see it pulse. 

his breath quickens the longer you take to begin touching him.

you start by teasing his swollen tip, arousal evident in the stain on his gray boxers. he sighs heavily, tipping his head back.

as you rub your hand down to his base, you get a feel for how thick he truly is. 

he’s hard. aching. even at the slightest touch, his eyebrows furrow and he holds back soft groans. 

you rip your hand off his clothed bulge. “if you want me to continue, you need to let me hear you, baby.” 

that was his breaking point, he quickly nods his head yes looking at you with pleading eyes, “c—can you please touch me? it hurts.” 

not wanting to tease him any longer, you rip his boxers off his thighs and his throbbing length slaps against his lower abdomen reaching just above his belly button. precum smears on his abs and you get the urge to lick it off.

so you do.

you gently move his dick away from his toned stomach, swiping your wet muscle along his abs, sucking to leave light marks. 

the noises he makes are downright pornographic, and you think you’ll never be able to hear them enough.

moving your attention back to the hardness in your grasp, you begin to lick up his shaft, tracing each vein with the tip of your tongue. his head is still tipped back, frustrating you a bit because you want his attention on you. 

so… in one swift motion, you take him down your throat until his tip hits the back. his head shoots up and he moans. loud. 

heeseung is in heaven. the feeling of your throat constricting around his cock, he never wants you to pull off of him. he gently pulls your hair into a ponytail, hands shaking when you start moving.

his apartment is filled with filthy noises: wet, loud, and obscene. 

he can hear and feel your gag reflexes kicking in but you don’t budge. you continue to move up and down, not wanting to stop until he cums. 

his tipping point was you somehow taking him even further down your throat, nose brushing his pelvis. he thought you were going to take a break for air but you didn't. 

you stay.

swallowing around him.

the pressure in your jaw is almost unbearable but when you feel his thighs shaking, you know he’s close. and you need to ruin him. 

hollowing your cheeks, you swirl your tongue around his engorged tip, hands coming up to play with his heavy balls. he can’t hold back anymore. the sensation of you taking his whole cock down your tiny throat and the stimulation of his balls in your hands. he groans. 

desperate. low. deep

and spills down your throat. warm, wet, and sticky ropes, pour out of his tip. taking up all the space you had left, some spilling out from the corners of your mouth.

you swallow all that you can, then pull off from his dick. 

heavy breathing is the only thing that can be heard. heeseung threw an arm over his eyes, chest heaving, trying to regain control of his senses.

meanwhile, you haven’t stopped clenching your thighs together. 

you didn’t even notice you were staring until he clears his throat. he just looks so gorgeous all fucked out.

“wow. did you– swallow.. it?” he asks through pants. 

you answer him like it was the most natural thing in the world, “yeah, because it was you” 

he moans, again. and that’s when you notice he’s still hard, still aching. 

as you move to straddle his lap, he grabs your thighs and wraps your legs around his waist. “not here, i want our first time to be special” he says softly, with a kiss to your temple. 

he carries you to his bedroom on wobbly legs and gently lays you down on his bed, hovering on top of you. he plants wet kisses all over your face, trailing down to your neck, collarbones, until he reaches your covered chest.

looking at you with big, lust filled eyes, he waits for your green light. you nod and he fumbles with your bra clasp, eventually tearing the fabric away. 

“you’re stunning,” he says completely awestruck by your half-naked form. 

as he continues staring, he licks his lips, slowly lowering his head wrapping his soft lips around one of your perky buds. 

you instinctively arch into his touch, one of his hands wrapping around your waist as his other hand gently kneads your other boob. soft gasps and whines slip from your lips as you try to grind up in search of any friction where you need it most. 

he senses your desperate pleas and starts moving his body to slot between your legs, face in front of your clothed core. you wiggle your hips trying to convince him to speed up and touch you where you need it the most. 

“can i…?” he practically begs, “yeah” you sigh as you relax into his plush sheets. he drags your sweats down your soft legs planting kisses along the inside of your thighs, all the way down to your calves. he makes his way to your panty clad pussy, pressing a soft kiss to your bundle of nerves aching for him. 

you don’t think you’ve ever been this turned on before.

he looks so good between your thighs, you want this image ingrained into your brain forever. 

he brings his thumb up to press on the wet spot that’s formed on your panties, groaning, “fuck, you’re so wet.” 

“all for you.” 

he replays those words in his head and his patience snaps. tearing your underwear in half, he wastes no time. tongue lapping and the wetness between your legs, like he’s been deprived of any liquid all his life.

you’ve never met someone this desperate to eat you out. or anyone for that matter.

he mumbles against your core, “guide me, please, wan’ you t’feel good, mmh.”

your hands take place in his silky soft roots, gently tugging on the strands. 

through whimpers, you tell him to focus on your clit, and surprisingly (for a virgin), he finds it fairly quickly. 

he briefly sucks on the nub, flicking it with his tongue to soothe it. “fuck, hee” you moan out into the space of his bedroom. 

he groans against your pussy, carefully bringing up his fingers so he can push his tongue into your awaiting hole. the moment he starts fucking you with his tongue, you arch your back and grind into his face, needing more. 

he heard his friends talking about “prep” and “stretching girls out,” so he wonders if you need to be stretched out to take him. you said he was huge, did you mean it? he has no idea, he’s a pathetic virgin who has only shoved his dick into his right hand. not even a pocket pussy or fleshlight. 

to your dismay, he pulls away for a brief second asking if he should use his fingers. “please, i need you to stretch me out, i can’t– take you without prep,” you rush out feeling your high not far away.

“shit, okay baby,” he mutters back before bringing his middle finger up to spread your juices around. 

your hips jerk up when he focuses on your clit, surprised by the stimulation. 

slowly, he pushes his finger in, getting used to the warm sensation of your walls. 

you clench around his thick digit, feeling fuller than when you finger yourself. as he pumps it in and out, you tell him to add another one and he does. 

moaning in relief, you arch into his touch as his tongue finds its way back to your sensitive clit. 

between him lapping like a dog and the feeling of two of his fingers pumping in and out of your tight hole, you feel a familiar band in your stomach building up.

your moans increase and heeseung feels dizzy, taking in all that you give.

he curves his fingers all while sucking on your bundle of nerves, causing you to tip over the edge and that band in your stomach to snap. 

you come crashing down, chanting his name like a mantra as heeseung helps you ride out your high. 

as you lift your head and meet his gaze, he looks more fucked out than you do. hooded eyes, tongue lolled out of his mouth, gaze consumed with lust. you pull him by the collar of his shirt until your lips collide in a mess of tongues and teeth. 

your makeout session unfortunately doesn’t last long as heeseung starts whining into your lips. 

that’s when you realize his cock found your bent knee, not so subtly grinding against it, trying to relieve some of the ache. 

“feeling needy, are we?” you tease, earning a playful roll of the eyes from heeseung. 

pulling back, you drink in his bare torso– he’s always been muscular as he was very popular with the ladies (until he got into bed with them). 

dragging your hand up his chiseled abs, his stomach tenses and his dick twitches. 

you found his second biggest weakness, besides you. his abs. 

deciding to end the teasing there, since you’re also becoming increasingly impatient, you flip him over so you land on top of him with a quiet, “oof.” 

as you settle your bare core on his rock solid cock, you start grinding, placing your hands on his chest for support. 

he can’t hold back the guttural groans spilling from his mouth. not believing you’re really on top of him right now. this isn’t just one of his wet dreams. 

he thought this couldn’t get any better, but when he struggles to get out a weak ask for a condom, you just respond with “no, i’m– on the pill. need to feel you. all of you.” 

and to that, he moans, not believing his ears. 

it’s his first time. and he’s about to have sex with YOU. raw. he thinks he’s dreaming. there’s no way you’re real.

you gently angle his dick towards your awaiting hole, sinking down until his fat tip is inside you.

instantly, you both sigh in relief, starting to feel the pressure ease up. 

if you feel a stretch at his tip entering you, you don’t know how you’re supposed to fit all of him inside you. he’s the biggest you’ve seen and he doesn’t even know it.

your attention is drawn back to the man consuming your brain when he whines. “m-more, please.” he’s becoming needier the longer you stay at just his tip but you don’t know how to tell him you’ve never taken a size like him before.

“hee-heeseung i need a sec, you’re– fuck. so thick,” you say between moans. 

his grip on your hips tightens, a silent way of telling you to take your time. 

when you finally deem yourself ready, you sink lower, wanting to speed it up, bracing the stretch to come. 

you feel him pulsing inside you and that’s all you need to sink all the way down, him bottoming out inside you. 

it’s his first time feeling anything other than his hand wrapped around him, and he whimpers, loud. it’s overstimulating in the best way possible and before he knows it you move up to his tip and bounce back down. his dick twitches and you feel it. every vein, every pulse, every movement, even his heavy breathing. 

heeseung, not in control of his movements, bucks his hips up, making another non-existent inch fit inside your stretched out core. 

you moan soft and loud, eyes rolling back, as the pain turned into pleasure. bouncing faster on his girthy cock, you uncontrollably clench around him, causing heeseung’s grip to tighten. you know it’ll bruise tomorrow, but at the moment, he feels too good for you to care. 

the room smells of sex, and the only sounds that can be heard are skin clapping and your shared noises. 

heeseung must notice your legs becoming tired because before you know it, you’re flat on your back with heeseung on top of you, cock never slipping out from your pussy. 

his large hands grab each of your thighs, pressing them to your chest.

his pace is slow at first, testing the waters, getting a feel for a rhythm. 

as his hands stay pressed to your thighs, he slowly drags out and pushes all of his dick inside you. 

you feel him deeper in this position, a bulge forming in your lower belly. 

when he notices, his eyes stay glued there.

you wonder what he’s looking at but the moment you look down, you’re met with his hand pressing slightly on the bulge causing the loudest moan to leave your lips. 

he signals you to hold your thighs as one of his hands holds himself up and the other focuses on how he can feel his dick inside your guts with every thrust. 

his pace suddenly quickens when you clench hard around him, making his hips stutter briefly. 

endless praises leave his pretty lips, telling you how good you feel, how hot you look laid underneath him, taking whatever he gives you. 

feeling a familiar, yet new sensation building rapidly, you try to warn him that you’re close but somehow, he already knows. “i know baby, let go whenever you want.” he mutters back, feeling just as close to his high.

“fuck– where do you want it?” he rushes out, not wanting to cum inside you if that isn’t what you want. 

but apparently, all the gods are smiling down on him as you release your thighs from the grip you had on them and wrap your legs around his waist. “inside,” you moan. 

and at that, he cums. hard. ropes of his hot, gooey, cum spill inside you. tipping you over the edge.

with a loud groan, clear liquid comes rushing out from you, spraying all over his sheets and lower abdomen. soaking his dick. 

heeseung moans. again. raw and unfiltered at the fact that you just squirted all over him (he’s seen enough porn and heard too many stories from your shared friend group to know what squirting is). 

as you come down from your high, heeseung is somehow still cumming. it spills out of you, creating an even stickier mess on his bed. but he doesn’t care. 

not when you’re beneath him, chest rising rapidly, trying to catch your breath. 

heeseung’s cock is still lodged inside you, holding half of his cum inside you, not wanting it to go to waste. 

as he collapses on top of you, he places a soft kiss on your forehead, holding your trembling body close to his.

you were the first to speak, “i didn’t even know i could do that,” talking about how you squirted all over him. “guess we both had firsts today,” he softly chuckles. 

his breath is warm against your skin, his arm tightening just a little around your waist as if anchoring himself in the moment. you don’t respond right away, too caught up in the quiet thrum of your heartbeat, the lingering warmth between you, the way his fingers begin tracing gentle, absent-minded shapes against your spine.

“i didn’t expect it to be like this,” you murmur, your voice almost lost in the hush of the room.

“like what?” he asks, voice low, like he’s afraid to shatter the calm.

you shift slightly to face him, resting your head more comfortably on his chest. “soft. safe.”

Hheeseung lets out a breath that sounds like relief and something deeper, something reverent. “yeah,” he whispers. “me neither.”

for a while, neither of you say anything. he pulls the blanket higher over both of you, his other hand brushing your hair back with such tenderness that it makes your eyes sting. he presses a kiss to your forehead, lingering like he means it.

“you okay?” he asks, voice still rough from earlier, but softer now, like the edge of him has been smoothed by your touch.

you nod, then glance up at him. “are you?”

heeseung meets your gaze, and something in his expression shifts. vulnerability bleeding through the cracks he used to hide behind. “i am now.”

your heart squeezes.

he licks his lips, nervous. “i’ve been so stupid with you. all this time, i kept pushing and pulling, thinking maybe if i kept it messy, it’d be easier to walk away if i had to.” he pauses, his voice thinning. “but tonight just… made me realize i don’t want to walk away.”

your breath catches. “heeseung…”

“i don’t want this to be a one time thing,” he says, eyes searching yours. “not the sex, not the closeness. i want you. the fights, the tension, the way you drive me crazy and still somehow make me want to be better just by being around you. i’m so in love with you, it hurts.”

your lips part in surprise, and he laughs quietly, self-deprecating and shy. “too much?”

instead of answering, you lean up and kiss him, slow, deep, and full of all the things you couldn’t say until now. when you pull back, you rest your forehead against his, smiling as his thumb brushes over your cheek.

“i’m in love with you too, idiot.”

he grins, wide and a little teary-eyed, and pulls you closer like he’s never letting go.

and you know he won’t have to.

pls reblog & leave feedback <3 hope you enjoyed the read ◡̈

[ @jaeyuniversal ] prod. 250417

wrong number

𓇼 pairing : roommate's best friend!jake x reader

𓇼 summary : a mistaken text might not always be a bad mistake.

𓇼 genre : smut, angst. sexting, nudes, lots of talk ab being stretched out, degrading, slight spanking ;)

𓇼 wc : 12.3k!

𓇼 taglist : @jaehoonii @ikeuverse @soobinsnovia101 @river-demon-slayer @criminalyun @idkmaybeimgay @flowerlvrs-blog @miszes @koralira-kira  @dreamiestay @vevelu @niniissus @i2sunric @belovedsthings @yeonzzzn  @littlefluu @breadlover01 @kookify @j3nnypng @crpasta @isabellah29 @starggukies @fakeuwus @yongbokified @jjakeylattee @shiningnono @lilifiedeans @simpjay @kirinaa08 @hoonneyyzz @hwanchaesong @cupidscourt @luvsweet78 @jayshadoww @cha0thicpisces @eloelooo

mdni

your roommate, sunghoon, had just said goodnight to you as you both headed off to your separate bedrooms for the night. there had been a long awaited movie night for the both of you and somehow both of you had managed to stay up so late, that both of you were going to be exhausted for university tomorrow. 

as soon as your head touches your pillow and your blanket pulls up to your chin, your phone vibrates from your nightstand. you sigh, wanting to ignore the notification, but the curiosity of who was texting you after midnight intrigued you so much that you just had to reach over and look. 

unknown : [image.jpg] [12:46]

instantly your jaw drops as you realize what the image was. this was the last thing you had expected from an unknown number. 

in the picture, was obviously a man’s hand covering his apparent large bulge in his black boxers. you could see the tan skin of his defined abs in the light glow of the room he was in. the picture showed up to his neck, his face being cut off. you wondered briefly if his face would have distracted you more than his bulge. 

unknown : [i told you i was good at taking pics, vera ;)] [12:47]

vera? you had no idea who vera was but you were definitely not her and this picture was definitely not for you. after debating on what to do about this mistaken text, another one rolled in. 

unknown : [what? cat got your tongue now?] [12:50]

you sigh but decide to answer, your thumbs moving briskly across the keyboard of your phone. sleep completely leaving your mind now as your eyes keep glancing up at the stranger’s picture. 

you : [hey, uh, this isn’t vera? so sorry] [12:50]

it only took a second after pressing send for the stranger’s texting bubble to pop up, indicating that he was typing. your nervously sat up in bed, brushing your hair out of your face. 

unknown : [oh my god i’m so sorry] [12:50] unknown : [my idiot friend gave me this number saying it was this girl vera im so sorry] [12:51]

you chuckle to yourself at his texts, feeling his obvious stress through the screen. his excessive apologies were relaxing you, knowing this wouldn’t have to be more awkward than it was. until, 

unknown : [but you must’ve thought i was good at taking pics too, i mean you stared at the pic for so long ;) ] [12:52]

you had no idea who this was but he was so cocky. but he was so right. you couldn’t take your eyes off of his picture for more than a minute. the angle it was taken at teased you to want to see more of his body. it felt wrong since the picture was obviously not meant for you. but how could you not look at a picture that made him look this good. still, you cursed yourself for having read receipts on. 

you : [i wasn’t looking at it] [12:53] you : [but it’s definitely the most interesting wrong number i’ve ever gotten ] [12:53] unknown : [oh really? how many wrong numbers do you get?] [12:54] you : [not many, but def not ones with ab pics] [12:54] unknown : [with hot ab pics?? ;)] [12:55]

your jaw drops again. how many wink faces will he send? but you sigh, because you know he’s right. 

you : [fine, not many with hot ab pics] [12:56] unknown : [glad i could be your first ;)] [12:57] unknown : [sorry i guess i’m pretty… self assured?] [12:57]

you roll your eyes at him now. this guy was definitely something else. how could he not be so embarrassed that he sent such an intimate picture to not only the wrong person, but a complete stranger at that. 

you : [i think i would use the word cocky instead] [12:58] unknown : [heyy be nice, you got that hot pic for free!] [12:58] you : [yeah well thanks a lot, now i can’t sleep] [12:59] you : [i’m wide awake bc of you] [12:59] unknown : [you’re welcome!] [1:01] unknown : [i couldn’t leave a pretty girl like you being tired!] [1:01]

you scoff at his text, but it was true. you didn’t think you could lay back down and fall asleep with this much adrenaline running through you. you were curious about this boy. he seemed to be so different compared to you. you couldn’t guess what his next text or reaction would be. you were intrigued and had nothing else to do at 1am, so you texted him again. 

you : [how do you know if i’m pretty or not??] [1:03] unknown : [i’ve got a good feeling ;)] [1:04] you : [yeah? what else does your good feeling tell you about me?] [1:04]

you realized your text could have sounded a bit flirty. maybe a bit cringey, but you figured if this stranger could be so indifferent and flirtatious then why couldn’t you?

unknown : [that you’re into dirty, nasty things] [1:06] unknown : [like riding a guys’ abs, getting yourself off] [1:06]

you felt your eyes bulge out of your head as you read his texts. your mouth felt dry as you realize he was right. you couldn’t stop staring at his pic. the way the abs were so defined just in a picture you couldn’t imagine what they looked like up close. 

you : [were you planning to get vera to do that with you?] [1:08] unknown : [nah] [1:08] unknown : [just with you] [1:08]

you have to reach over to your bedside table to get some water. you gulp it down as you keep your eyes on his texts. reading them over and over, not believing they were real. 

unknown : [would you want that?] [1:09]

you hesitantly type back. 

you : [maybe] [1:10] you : [but i usually only fuck guys with big cocks] [1:10]

you felt like you had to lower his ego somehow with the way he has been so cocky (self assured) over these texts. you could tell from the bulge in his accidental picture that he wasn’t lacking in the size department. but letting him think that it was, would justify your need to decrease his ego. 

unknown : [you don’t think i could fill you? haha] [1:11] unknown : [i would stretch you out so good] [1:12]

you would be lying if you said his texts weren’t turning you on. because truth be told, you hadn’t had sex in a while. you had gone on dates, went to parties, tried to talk to your mutual friends but no one ever seemed worth your while. 

except for this complete stranger that accidentally texted you. 

you : [hmm maybe you’ll get to show me some day] [1:13] unknown : [oh i definitely will ;)] [1:13]

after another minute another text comes through. 

unknown : [since you have a pic of me to drool over] [1:14] unknown : [how about you send me a pic? ;)] [1:14]

you instantly knew that you would not be sending this guy a picture tonight– maybe even never. you liked flirting with him. and you definitely liked his picture. but no way in hell would he be seeing you tonight. 

you : [hahaha] [1:15] you : [goodnight :)] [1:15] unknown : [goodnight] [1:16]

with that, you slid your phone onto your bedside table again and laid back down in bed. you thought of his texts and his forwardness and how it was something that you almost admired in a way. you thought that maybe it wouldn’t have been the worst idea to send him a teasing picture. you might not ever meet the guy or know who he is. but before you could think more of him and his texts, sleep crept onto you finally.

the next day, you had practically forgotten all about the flirty stranger from the night before. 

you ended up being late to class since you had slept in from staying up late the night before. which meant that you had forgotten your textbooks on your kitchen table at home. which meant each class of yours was messed up since you didn’t have your books.

you were completely frazzled the whole day, seemingly never being able to catch a break. 

you felt mentally and physically exhausted when you finally got to lay down for bed that night. you were ready for sleep when the same event happened. your phone vibrated from a notification on your bedside table. 

you sighed and reached over, not lifting your head from your pillow as you did so. and there on your phone’s screen, is another text from the unknown number.

unknown : [i can’t stop thinking about you and this convo] [10:36]

you couldn’t help the smile that grew on your face. the sleep that once consumed you was leaving your body once again due to this stranger’s text. you thought for a second, and then texted back. 

you : [what exactly have you been thinking about?] [10:38]

he was quick with his reply, no hesitation to your question. 

unknown : [what your voice sounds like] [10:38] unknown : [what it sounds like when you whisper my name] [10:38]

you : [what would i be whispering to you?] [10:40]

unknown : [all the things you’d let me do to you] [10:41] unknown : [i’ve been thinking about how much i wanna kiss you and touch you] [10:41] unknown : [make you feel good] [10:41]

after the day you had, you thought maybe this would be a good ending to it. you could feel yourself get more aroused by each of his texts coming through. 

you : [hmm] [10:42] you : [and what if i told you i’ve been thinking the same things] [10:42]

unknown : [then we definitely have to do something about it] [10:43] unknown : [sooner, rather than later] [10:43]

you : [and what exactly did you have in mind?] [10:44]

you tapped your fingers on your phone as you waited for his reply. you were getting anxious for some reason as you waited for his text longer than usual. you had wondered if he had fallen asleep or had completely forgotten about you and this convo. 

unknown : [image.jpg] [10:50]

you pressed the picture notification faster than you’d ever admit to anyone. you weren’t disappointed at the picture to say the least. 

it was a downview angle, portraying his abdomen and legs laying in bed. he was wearing nothing but a set of light gray boxers. his bulge was so very evident in the picture that it made your thighs tighten together. 

unknown : [i think it’s only fair for you to send me a pic now ;)] [10:51]

you bit your lip as you read his second message. knowing that he was right. it would be only fair at this point. 

you thought for moment of what to send him. you sat up and took your shirt off, leaving you in only your bralette. you slid your thumb to the camera on your phone and held it up. making sure to leave your face out of it, you took a picture of your breasts pushed together in your pretty bralette. 

thinking that you couldn’t do any better you sent it. and you waited for his answer which came surprisingly quick. 

unknown : [holy shit] [10:55] unknown : [you’re so hot] [10:55] unknown : [i’m actually so hard right now] [10:56]

you : [i’m so wet right now] [10:56]

you weren’t lying, you could feel your panties start to drip at the situation you were in. his texts and pictures made it easy for your panties to start to get soaked. you haven’t had any action lately, which made it even easier for you to get so wet. 

unknown : [god i bet you are] [10:56] unknown : [i wish i was there right now] [10:57] unknown : [are you touching yourself?] [10:57]

you : [yes] [10:58] you : [with my fingers] [10:58]

unknown : [let me see] [10:59]

this time, you moved with a little less hesitance. you sent a picture of your body laying down on your bed. your fingers covered by your panties as they circled your clit. he could see exactly how you were touching yourself now. 

unknown : [fuck me] [11:02] unknown : [your body’s perfect] [11:02] unknown : [image.jpg] [11:03]

you pressed the image he sent quickly. his hand was wrapped around the base of his cock as the camera pointed down at it. you could see it unveiled for the first time. it was definitely better than you would’ve ever thought. it was long, and veiny and the tip was pink and leaking precum. 

when you clicked out of the photo, he had already continued texting you. 

unknown : [it’s a shame that i’m not there with you rn] [11:03] unknown : [your thighs look so soft and warm i wish i was between them] [11:04] unknown : [i’d kill to have my tongue between your thighs] [11:04]

you tried to think of what his face would have looked like with his body and cock looking so delicious. you figured his face would have to compare to them. 

you : [i want it so bad] [11:05] you : [i want your tongue and your cock and you] [11:05] you : [i need it] [11:06]

unknown : [god i can tell how naughty you are] [11:06] unknown : [i know you like it rough] [11:06] unknown : [you wanna be pounded into the mattress] [11:07]

you continued to massage your clit in quick, small circles as you watched him type out everything you thought of. everything that turned you on, he seemed to know. 

unknown : [i have a feeling you like to be choked] [11:08] unknown : [do you want me to do that to you?] [11:08] unknown : [choke you while i fuck deep inside of you?] [11:08]

you : [god i’d love that] [11:09] you : [i wanna feel you deep inside of me] [11:09] you : [i’d take it like a good girl] [11:10]

you decided to record a video of yourself to send it to him this time. you knew he’d continue texting you as you swiped to the camera app again. you record yourself, thinking completely and only of him, even though you don’t know what he looks like or his name. 

you focus the camera on your hand in your panties. the microphone picks up on your heavy breaths and whines and the wet sounds your pussy makes as you continue your movements. 

“please sir, i want your cock deep inside of me. i know you’d stretch me out so fucking good!” you moaned loudly for him, your fingers not stopping as you stopped recording and sent it to him. 

as he watched your video, you looked back on the texts he had sent you. 

unknown : [yeah you’d be such a good girl for me right?] [11:11] unknown : [i’d have to slide my fingers into your first i bet] [11:12] unknown : [so you’d be able to take my cock] [11:12]

you : [video.mp4] [11:13]

unknown : [sir?!?!] [11:15] unknown : [god your voice is so hot] [11:15] unknown : [you’re such a dirty girl] [11:16] unknown : [you even sound so wet and creamy fuck] [11:16]

you almost laugh at his texts as you start to slide your fingers into your pussy. your middle and ring fingers easily find your g spot everytime you push them back into your core. you try to image they are this stranger, pleasuring you. 

before you could answer him, he sent a video of his own. you instantly pressed it, wanting to see him, to hear him, so bad. 

it was a video of his hand wrapped around his cock. you could see his cock glistening in the flash on his camera from his precum and most likely his spit. his hand was moving up and down his cock at a decent pace. a grunt left his mouth when his hand glided over his tip. 

you thought the video was over, but then he spoke. 

“you’re making it so hard for me to not cum. i could cum any second, but i want to hear you cum first. i wanna see it. i wanna see your- fuck, fingers soaked with your juices.” 

you replayed the video once more, needing to hear his low voice grunt out each word as he continued to pleasure himself to the things you had sent him. 

you : [you’re so fucking hot] [11:20] you : [i’m so close to cumming] [11:20] you : [i’ll cum whenever you want, sir] [11:20]

unknown : [keep pleasuring yourself baby] [11:21] unknown : [do you have your fingers deep inside of you??] [11:21] unknown : [you know they won’t stretch you as much as my cock can] [11:22]

you could tell by the pictures and his video that he was definitely telling the truth. the stretch that his cock could do had your fingers moving faster, your palm rubbing against your clit as you pushed your fingers in and out of you. 

unknown : [you’re so nasty i bet you’d like to be choked] [11:23] unknown : [my one hand on your throat] [11:23] unknown : [and my other one would be rubbing your clit] [11:23] unknown : [as i fuck you] [11:24]

you : [fuck] [11:24] you : [that’s all i want sir] [11:25] you : [can i cum for you?] [11:25] you : [please sir] [11:25]

unknown : [fuck, you cum baby] [11:25] unknown : [let sir see you cum] [11:26]

not a second later, you’re recording yourself again. making sure to get a good shot of your fingers entering and leaving your pussy. making sure he can see just how wet he has gotten you. you can’t help but whine and moan as your hips buck against your fingers. 

you’re so desperate for an orgasm. you’ve been so deprived of anything recently that you knew from the start it wouldn’t take long or much to get you to cum. but this man, this stranger, seems to know exactly what to do to get you to cry and shake and moan. 

“fuck, sir!” you cry out to him. your hips bucking against your fingers more at the thought of him watching this. at the thought of him touching you, choking you, slapping your clit, his cock stretching you so fucking good. “i’m cumming! fuck i’m cumming just for you!” 

you let your camera record your entire orgasm, pressing stop with your body still shaking and your chest heaving to catch your breath. you watch as the recording sends to him. 

it takes a minute for him to respond. your eyes becoming sleepy but your heart racing at the same time with anticipation. 

unknown : [omg] [11:30] unknown : [fuck im so close] [11:30] unknown : [fuck you’re so hot] [11:30]

you : [please cum for me sir] [11:31] you : [i wanna see it so bad] [11:31] you : [i wanna see your cum drip all over you into a little mess] [11:31]

another minute passes before you get a response and you don’t hesitate to press play. 

unknown : [video.mp4] [11:33]

the video has him jerking his cock faster than he was in the previous video. his grunting has turned into moans that are almost whiney. he’s hissing and cursing under his breath as his camera shakes. his hips are practically fucking into his hand. 

you were drooling at his video. 

“fuck you’re such a dirty slut.” he grunts out, his voice like honey despite the situation. “i- i’m so close. i wish you were here to lick up my cum.” his admission makes you wish you could lick it up. you wondered if it would taste sweet on your tongue. you feel like you’d do anything to pleasure him now, without even knowing what his face looks like. 

“fuck baby, i’m cumming.” he grunts out, his throat getting tighter as his cum spurts out of the red tip, landing on his sheets, his thighs and fingers. he curses some more as his hand comes to a halt on his cock. he moves his phone in for you to get a closer look at his mess. his breaths heavy in the microphone. “this is all for you baby.” he says finally before the recording unfortunately ends. 

you wanna watch it again but he’s already texting you again. 

unknown : [that was so good] [11:34] unknown : [i haven’t came that hard in so long] [11:35] unknown : [you’re so hot] [11:35]

you : [that was really good] [11:36]

you catch yourself smiling at your phone. between your thighs still a mess as you lay on your bed. you feel relieved in a way. you’ve been so pent up for so long that you really needed this and you didn’t even know. 

unknown : [so] [11:37] unknown : [since you made me cum so hard] [11:37] unknown : [will i get to know your name?] [11:37]

you bite your lip as you read his question. you figure that he was right, you both had seen and heard such intimate parts of one another. he had made you cum so hard, too. 

you : [y/n] [11:38]

instantly he replies. 

and his replies make your heart sink to the bottom of your stomach. 

unknown : [holy shit y/n?] [11:38] unknown : [its jake] [11:39]

you sit up in your bed, your hand gripping onto your phone tight with sudden nervousness as you take in his messages. your other hand holds your loose hair out of your face as you try to take in all the information. your brain trying to process it all. 

unknown : [holy shit] [11:39] unknown : [fucking dumbass sunghoon gave me the wrong number] [11:39] unknown : [holy shit] [11:40]

you’re reading his messages as they come through but you can’t stop yourself from hyperventilating in your bedroom that is right next door to sunghoon’s. 

the supposed stranger that you had just sexted. that had heard your moans and see your body shake from pleasure. that you had imagined their cock inside of you. was your roommates best friend. 

your roommates best friend that you were strictly told to absolutely, under no circumstances, to get involved with in any way besides friends. 

though you weren’t even sure if you and jake were friends to begin with. 

sure, you had hung out a few times when sunghoon or other mutual friends were present. you had gone to the same parties. you had said hello in your hallway before he left with sunghoon to go somewhere else. you had heard a few of his drunk stories. 

and there was that one time you had made out in his kitchen. 

you swear you had only made out for two minutes before sunghoon called jake’s name, causing both of you to pull apart before sunghoon could catch you. thankfully, sunghoon was so drunk that he didn’t sense the awkward shock that was between you two when he walked in the kitchen. 

though, those two minutes were something you thought about often, though you would never admit that to anyone. 

it was lustful and passionate and you knew you shouldn’t be doing it. you have no idea how it started, but you know it was amazing. his plush lips on your own as you let his tongue enter your mouth. you didn’t fight for dominance, letting him take over so easily. his hands roamed your body and rested on your ass, pulling you closer to him. your arms wrapped around his neck so naturally, keeping his face against yours. 

sometimes, you let yourself think about what might have happened if sunghoon hadn’t walked in. would he have taken you to his room? would you have let him? or would you have both come to your senses at some point and realize that you definitely shouldn’t have been doing that? 

you and jake had met sunghoon separately at different parts in sunghoon’s life. jake had grown up with sunghoon in their small town. while you had met sunghoon during your freshman year at university. sunghoon and you had the great idea of moving in with each other since you got along so well. he was basically your best friend. you told him everything (except for you making out with jake), he had seen you cry, he had seen you blackout drunk and he really cared about you. 

when jake started going to your university a during sophomore year, sunghoon had told you to not get involved with jake with anything more than friends. he cared about both of you equally.

you understood where he was coming from, both of his best friends dating could potentially be a disaster for him if things went wrong. he would become the middleman, and could lose both of his friends. it’s just an uncomfortable position. 

so, you knew that you could not have any feelings for jake at all before you even met him. but that was so hard since he was so attractive (and now because you knew what he sounded like when he orgasms). 

after trying to piece at least some of it together you glance back at your phone. 

unknown : [are you still there?] [11:44] unknown : [i swear i didn’t know it was you y/n] [11:44] unknown : [but you are really so hot] [11:44]

you suddenly felt like crying. you feel like you had betrayed sunghoon and his trust. but you feel like you were betraying yourself by not allowing yourself to do what you want. which you want to allow yourself to give in to jake. 

you never knew your exact feelings for jake since you always told yourself it was forbidden. but now that you’ve explored it, you know you want- need more. 

you feel like ripping your hair out. but you decide to do what is right. 

you : [night jake ] [11:45]

jake : [night y/n :( ] [11:46]

you decide to not think about what the sad face meant in his text and turn off your phone completely, putting it in it’s spot on your bedside table and rolling over for the night. you want to scream into your pillow, but you don’t. you force yourself to go to sleep, just like you force yourself to ignore anything you feel or think about jake. 

you’re doing what’s right. for the sake of your friendship with sunghoon, who was asleep just meters away from you. you could hear his snoring through the wall.

you go to bed early friday night. 

you decline sunghoon’s offer for another movie night. you practically crawl into bed, shutting your phone off completely before falling asleep, finally escaping the thoughts of jake and your betrayal to sunghoon. 

you manage to stay in bed all of saturday. you haven’t been able to face sunghoon since you apparently sexted jake a few days ago. you knew jake would not tell sunghoon about your texts, but that didn’t exactly clean your moral code. you felt wrong for lying to sunghoon while sleeping under the same roof with him. 

it’s late into the afternoon when there’s a quick, faint knock on your bedroom door. you mumble into your pillow for him to come in, knowing it was sunghoon. 

when he pushes the door open his hair is wet over his forehead and he has a towel wrapped around his slim waist. a sight that you were used to. 

“hey,” sunghoon smiles at you with a concerned expression on his face from the doorway, “you feeling alright? you’ve been in bed all day.” 

you wanna tell him that that’s the point but instead you say, “yeah i’m fine, just tired.” 

sunghoon nods and then leans on the door frame with his muscular arms crossed over his bare chest, water droplets trailing down his skin from his shower, “well we’re going to a party tonight, i wanted to see if you wanted to come.” 

you want to groan at the thought of being a party, especially at a party that jake would certainly be at, but instead you shake your head at your roommate, “nah i’m okay, i just wanna get some rest tonight, hoon.” 

sunghoon pouts at you, “aw, okay.” 

“i’m sorry, you know you’ll have fun whether i’m there or not.” 

he shrugs, “yeah, jake and sunoo will be there, too, so.” 

you smile at him, noting that you were right that jake would be at the party. he’s always at a party and he’s always with sunghoon. 

“okay, have fun, hoon.” 

“have a good rest, y/n.” 

sunghoon teasingly waves his fingers at you as he closes the door again, leaving you alone in your dark bedroom. you cover your face with your hands as you let out a groan. you hate the feeling of hiding something from someone. and this was exactly that. 

what are you supposed to do in this situation? lie to your best friend and not tell him about sexting his best friend? or tell him that you betrayed his trust? 

you roll over and go back to sleep, the darkness in your room and the tireless thoughts racing in your mind make it easy. 

you wake up again a few hours later to laughter coming from outside your bedroom, probably from your living room. you search for your phone and notice that it’s the time that sunghoon usually leaves at when he goes to parties. 

instead of only hearing sunghoon, you hear another person as well. you can tell by the two distinct voices talking back and forth, the multiple footsteps walking around your apartment. you briefly wonder who it is and stand up to go look. 

your hand wraps around the doorknob when you still, your body tensing when you hear the all too familiar voice that you were supposed to be avoiding and pretending never existed. 

“what’s taking so long, i wanna leave!” jake’s voice whines out, obviously annoyed with how slow sunghoon gets ready. 

“ok! ok! i’m coming, let’s go.” sunghoon’s voice replies, sounding like he’s walking right past your room and into the living room on the other side of your door. 

“and, uh, why isn’t y/n coming?” you hear jake ask. your name coming out of his mouth makes your heart pick up its pace. 

it takes a second for sunghoon respond, probably busy putting his shoes on, “i don’t think she’s feeling well, she seemed pretty tired when i talked to her earlier.” 

you don’t hear jake reply to sunghoon’s explanation about your absence. just some more shuffling and murmuring and then the front door to your apartment closing and locking after they leave. it’s then that you can let out the breath you didn’t realize you were holding. your palm sweaty as you finally let go of the doorknob. 

you feel so confused and alone. you have no one to talk to about this problem since the problem includes your best friend– your best friend and roommate that you tell everything to. every problem you have, you go straight to him. 

you know you couldn’t possibly keep avoiding hanging out with sunghoon, not going out and pretending jake doesn’t exist. sunghoon would catch on too quick. he knows you too well. he’s probably already suspicious as to why you didn’t want to go out tonight. 

you sigh as you try to sort out your brain. but since the apartment was now officially empty for at least a few hours, you could leave your isolated bedroom to at least get a drink of water.

you are halfway through your third episode of Gossip Girl when your phone vibrates in its usual spot on your bedside table. without tearing your eyes away from chuck brushing blair’s hair behind her ear, his lips leaning close to hers, you grab your phone. 

you glance down at it, expecting it to be an insignificant notification, but you jolt when you read the name “jake”. you’re slamming your laptop shut in an instant, pausing it when blair is about to cuss chuck out for kissing her. your entire focus is on this message now. 

jake : [hey] [12:07] jake : [hoon told me u aren’t feeling well??] [12:07] jake : [but i wanted to tell u that i wish u were here] [12:07] jake : [i’d do anything to have ur lips on mine rn] [12:08]

you want to text back and tell him that he shouldn’t be texting you this or texting you at all. that he can’t be thinking of you like this. especially when he’s out drinking with sunghoon right now. you wonder if sunghoon could see jake’s texts right now. 

jake : [can i come over?] [12:09]

your mouth goes dry when you read his text. you contemplated every single con of him coming over right now. leaving the party he’s at with sunghoon, drunk, and coming over to your apartment where there’s tension between you two when there definitely shouldn’t be. 

you : [sure] [12:10]

jake : [i’ll be there in 10] [12:11]

you had ten minutes to clean up your room that you had rotted in all day, to brush your hair and put on a clean shirt. you didn’t know what jake wanted to come over for, but you assumed it wouldn’t do you any good with fixing the betrayal you had done to sunghoon. if anything, letting jake inside this apartment right now would only make things worse for you and your roommate. 

but sure enough, ten minutes later, you let jake inside your apartment after he softly knocked on the door. 

he’s wearing a black shirt that clings to torso and dark jeans that fit him well. his hair is tousled, as if he ran his fingers through it a few times during the night. he smells like his familiar cologne mixed with a faint smell of alcohol, instantly reminding you of the party he came from. 

“i’m sorry if i woke you,” jake speaks first as you close the door behind him. 

“it’s fine,” your voice comes out quiet and shaky and both of you pick up on how anxious and reserved you’re being. so different from your usual self. you clear your throat, “was the party not fun enough for you?” 

jake scoffs as he leans against the back of the couch, so confidently, as he looks at you practically folded into yourself, “it was fine. i just couldn’t stop thinking about you.” 

you shake your heads thim, “jake, we can’t do this. sunghoon would be really upset.” 

jake moves closer to you, his scent getting stronger. his voice is soft but intense when he speaks, “sunghoon isn't here right now. it’s just us.” he looks around the apartment to prove a point, “and i want you y/n. i want you so bad.” 

you take a step back, your back hitting the closed apartment door, your heart is racing as you look up at him. “he’s our best friend, jake. this,” you gesture between your bodies, “could really mess things up with our friendship with him.” 

jake steps forward again, closer to you. he slowly, almost hesitantly, reaches out and gently cups your face, almost scared you’re gonna disappear on him. it’s the first time jake and you have touched since you’ve made out so many months ago. “i know, but i can’t stop thinking about you,” his voice gets deeper, “ever since i’ve heard the way you moan and beg for more, i need you.” you gasp quietly at his words, your eyes not being able to leave him as he finishes, “don’t you feel the same?”

your resolve weakens as you look at his puppy-like features, “jake, i do. you know i do. but it’s complicated.”

“it doesn’t have to be. just one night. let’s see where this goes. we can figure out the rest later.” jake tsks at you, his whole body pressing against yours now, pinning you against the door. when you don’t (can’t) answer, jake smiles, his lips brush against your ear, “let me show you how good i can make you feel, baby.”

you close your eyes, feeling the pull of desire overpowering you, “jake… i…” 

jake starts kissing your neck softly, whispering into your skin, “just say yes y/n. i’ve been thinking about this all week. all i want is you. i wanna know how you taste.” 

you can’t help the moan that escapes your lips, your arms wrapping around his neck, “please.” 

you feel jake smile against your skin. he’s lifting you up and carrying you out of the living room in a second. your squeal of shock and excitement fill your shared apartment. 

jake puts you down onto your bed. his lips meet yours with fast passion. they’re moving against yours with need. you can slightly taste the alcohol on his breath mixed with a mint flavour. both of you can tell that you’ve been wanting this forever. 

“can i take this off?” jake asks you, his fingers pulling on the bottom hem of your tank top. you nod in response, lifting your back off the mattress for him to pull it off completely. it leaves your chest exposed to him, his eyes widening as he stares at you. “fuck you’re so perfect.” 

before you can respond jake leans his head down and starts to nip and suck at one of your nipples. his other hand tweaks your other nipple with his fingers, pulling on it gently. he gets both of your nipples erect and hard, the feeling of them having attention makes your stomach tighten with pleasure. 

“are you gonna show me how much of a naughty girl you are, y/n? or were you just being a tease in those texts?” jake asks you, his voice deeper than ever. 

“what i said in the texts were true.” you tell him, your hands staying at your sides. 

“yeah? so you want my tongue, baby? want me to taste your pretty pussy?”

“please, wanna feel your tongue on me so bad.” 

jake presses a soft kiss onto your lower abdomen with a smirk before he starts to undo the string on your shorts and pull them down alongside your panties. you’re completely bare and exposed just for him, while he’s still completely dressed on top of you. 

the tension between you two is unmatchable as jake’s eyes switch from looking at your wet core to your eyes. he lets out a guttural groan as he leans down to press his tongue flat onto your pussy and licks a strip right up. you let out a moan of relief as you finally get to feel him. 

“oh fuck, you taste better than i imagined,” jake groans out before diving back in between your legs. he keeps his hands on your thighs, making your legs stay spread apart for him to pleasure you. his tongue does circles around your clit quickly. he alternates circling your clit with sucking it into his mouth and moving his head side to side. his pace is quick and rough and it’s all that you’ve wanted. “do you know how many times i’ve thought about this?” 

“fuck, probably as much as i have.” you hate how your voice already sounds out of breath. 

jake is licking long stripes up your entire pussy, making sure to get all of it wet, making sure to taste all of it. he groans out against your clit at your answer. 

“i’ve wanted my tongue on you since before i even met you– since sunghoon showed me a picture of you.” jake confesses, you aren’t sure if he’d tell you this if he wasn’t intoxicated, but you don’t regret hearing it. “and then it turns out i got to see your dirty pictures, got to read your dirty texts.” 

you moan out, you throw your head back as he continues to lick and suck in between his sentences. he’s really making such a mess in between your legs. his salvia mixed with your juices and spreading it all over. 

“you don’t know how many times i’ve looked at the pictures you sent me, y/n. they get me so hard so quick.” jake moves his tongue around and around your clit, hard and fast. 

“oh fuck, that feels so good, sir.” 

jake groans out at the name, his eyes closing as he continues to eat you out. he’s practically making out with your core at this point. he’s moaning into your pussy, his tongue and lips are sucking and swirling everywhere. his chin and lips are shining with your juices and his saliva. he almost looks beautiful. 

you reach down and let your hand tangle in his hair, pulling his face even closer to you, wanting and need more. 

“do you like the way i taste, sir?” 

“fuck, i love the way you taste. wish i could taste you forever.” jake moves his head up and down as he drags his tongue all over you. your inner thighs feel drenched, you’re sure there’s a wet spot on your blanket below you. 

jake pulls away for a second, his hand gliding around your thighs and abdomen, “fuck look at this little pussy– so fucking tight. you know you won’t be able to take my cock properly right?” 

you nod down to him, your fingers tweaking your nipples for pleasure, “fuck i know, sir. i need to be stretched out so bad. need to be stretched out by you.” 

jake bites his lip as he lets out a groan, your words obviously having an effect on him. his fingers pinch your lips together gently, “fuck it’s so small.” he can feel his cock twitch in his pants against your mattress. 

“please sir, i need you in me. i’ve wanted it for so long.” 

“okay, baby, okay.” jake nods and starts to slide his middle finger into you slowly. his finger glides in easily with how wet you are. he moves it out slowly again, warming you up for his big cock. “you tell me when i find your g spot, okay?” 

you nod at him, your fingers continuing to tweak your nipples, pulling on them gently as you watch him concentrate on making you feel good. his finger continues to prod until it hits your g spot, making your thighs spasm for a second. 

“fuck, right there, sir.” 

jake’s finger hits the same spot again, “right there?” 

“mhm,” you nod to him, “right there feels so good.” 

jake then eases another finger in alongside the first one. even the smallest stretch from his fingers makes you cry out. his fingers are so much wider and longer than your own. it’s been so long since you’ve been touched, stretched out, pleasured. 

“fuck! oh my god,”

jake leans down and starts sucking your clit into his mouth. his fingers pick up their pace slowly, making sure to hit your g spot everytime. he keeps one of his hands on your lower abdomen, keeping you from moving your hips too much. 

“i want you to cum for me, baby.” jake speaks into your pussy, his lips massaging you core. 

“i’m so close, sir. i want to cum so bad!” you figure if you weren’t so touch deprived and turned on, the higher pitch and desperation of your voice would humiliate you. but for right now, all you could think about was cumming on jake’s fingers and mouth. 

“give it to me, cum for me, let me see how much of a slut you can be.” jake grunts out to you. 

jake’s fingers start to pump faster and harder into you. the squelching noises of your wet pussy filled the room, mixing with your cries of pleasure and jake’s name. his tongue starts to flick your clit side to side before circling it and repeating. your grip on his hair tightens as your stomach starts to convulse with pleasure. 

“fuck i’m cumming, oh my god!” 

your body stills as waves of pleasure start to wash over you,jake never stopping his movements, wanting you to ride out the pleasure. you gasp and cry as your mind goes numb, the orgasm hitting you harder than ever. 

when the final wave of pleasure finishes, jake pulls away from you. your body is high on adrenaline and pleasure and all you can think about is jake’s cock finally filling you up. 

“fuck that was so hot,” jake stares at you with his mouth agape. 

you laugh breathlessly at him, “thank you?” 

jake leans over your body, pressing his lips to yours. the kiss is different this time. it’s sweet and nice in comparison to how dirty your actions were just seconds before. you can taste your juices on his lips and can feel how wet his chin is from eating you out. it’s so passionate that if your head wasn’t consumed by the thought of his clothed, hard cock rubbing against your bare pussy, that it would’ve scared you. 

“i wanna feel you inside of me,” you pull away from him, your hand cupping his jaw. 

jake bites his plush lip, “god this is like a dream.” 

you push him away, rolling your eyes with a laugh. jake stands, pulling his shirt off of his body first. his tan skin visible to yours eyes, allowing you to scan his upper half. you’ve seen him shirtless before. like last summer when you all went to the beach. of course, you couldn’t have checked out his body as freely as you can now– sunghoon wasn’t here to reprimand you. 

jake bends over to pull off his pants and boxers in one go– his cock springing free and hitting his stomach. it’s so much bigger in person than in the pictures and videos he had sent you. 

you wonder if it would even fit inside of you. if the teasing jake had said about it being too big for you was real instead. 

“are you sure you wanna do this, y/n?” jake’s voice brings you out of your thoughts. his head is tilted to the side as he looks down at you. 

you bite your lip as you nod your head, “i do, i want this. it’s just…” you trail off, not being able to form the words while he’s so concentrated on you. 

jake kneels onto the bed right beside you, your legs touching. “what is it, pretty girl?” jake’s hand brushes your hair behind your ear. 

you sigh, “it’s just, it’s been awhile since… i’ve had sex.” jake smirks instantly at your confession. you groan at his expression and cover your face, “stop!” 

jake laughs as he pulls your hands away, wanting to see the blush on your cheeks, “it’s okay! i’m not making fun of you!” he moves so he’s over top of your laying body. “you’re so cute.” he leans down so your lips meet. it’s a soft kiss, like neither of you are naked and needy right now. 

he pulls away and rests his forehead on your own, looking into your eyes, “do you trust me y/n?”

his chocolate eyes are so pretty and warm like his body on yours that you don’t hesitate to nod, “yeah, i do.” 

“then let me make you feel good, you know i wouldn’t hurt you.” 

you nod again, your lips touching his again, letting him know that this is what you want. 

jake brings his hand up to your mouth, “spit.” 

you do as he says, letting a pool of your spit collect in his hand from your lips. he brings it to his cock, wetting it by mixing your spit with his precum. 

you lay on your back again as jake moves closer to you, spreading your legs. the air on your exposed, wet pussy makes you shiver. he holds onto your legs as he spits down onto your pussy, making you moan out as his actions degrade you. 

while he keeps one hand on your thigh, the other one holds his cock, guiding it to your pussy. he slowly, teasingly, drags his cock up and down your slit, wetting his cock more. you let out a hiss when he glides over your clit. 

“tell me how much you want my cock,” jake tells you, his eyes switching from your cunt to your face. 

“i want it so bad, sir! i’ve thought about having you inside of me so many times, i need it!” you admit, his cock being so close to your hole making you more desperate than ever. 

“rub your clit for me, baby.” 

you snake your hand in between your legs, starting to rub slow circles onto your already sensitive clit. 

you feel the tip of jake’s cock start to enter your hole. you can already tell that it’s gonna be a tight fit. you try to focus on the pleasure aspect instead. 

“oh my god,” jake groans out, his own eyes rolling to the back of his head as he eases inside of you. “fuck you’re so tight, baby. feels like heaven.” you can only nod in response, your voice gone as he fills you up completely. 

once he’s fully inside, his stills, letting you both adjust to the feeling. he leans down over you, his mouth pressing kisses into your neck. your hand moves slow circles on your clit, distracting you from the feeling of your walls adjusting around him. 

“i told you i’d stretch you out good.” jake chuckles into your ear. 

“shut up,” you say breathlessly, “just fuck me.” 

jake’s lips meet yours before, “as you wish.” 

jake sits up, his cock still lodged inside of you. he slowly moves his hips back, pulling his cock out until only his large tip is inside of you. he picks up one of your legs, holding it to keep your legs spread and pussy exposed to him. 

jake gradually sets a pace, sliding in and out of you with the help of your saliva’s mixing with your juices. he makes sure to hit your sensitive spots every time he slides back inside of you. when you start being unable to keep your moans quiet, he reaches down and encircles your neck with his hand and squeezes. 

“i knew you like being choked,” jake nods down at you, “you know how?”

“how?” you asked him, remembering his texts to you about how he would fuck you, how he would choke you and make you cum. 

“because i know you like being treated like a whore.” 

jake continues to thrust in and out of you as his hand leaves your neck and instead cups your jaw, his thumb pushing past your lips to enter your mouth. you don’t hesitate to suck on his thumb, using it to cover your moans from how well he’s fucking into you. 

you keep both of your hands on your nipples as you look up at him. his bangs are pushed out of his forehead, and his eyebrows are pulled together as he concentrates on making both of you feel good. 

your tongue swirls around his thumb before sucking on it, a moan leaves his lips at the feeling of your mouth around his digit. 

“god i wish i could feel your mouth around my cock, i know you’d make me cum so fast.”

he pops his thumb out of your mouth and puts his hand on the mattress, holding himself up. 

“i’d suck you until you couldn’t take it anymore,” you tell him honestly, his pace picking up at your admission.

“fuck baby, you’re so dirty it turns me on so much.” jake groans out, his hips moving faster now that he’s holding himself up with both of his hands. his head leans down so we can watch where both of your bodies are meeting. your pussy spread open just for him. the mess between your legs glistening in the faint light in your room. god, he’s wanted this for so long. wanted to feel what your walls would feel like around him. 

jake wants more, he wants to do everything he’s ever thought of with you, and he knows that tonight may be the first and last time he ever gets you, “ get up and turn around, baby.” jake tells you, the thought of your ass makes his cock twitch. 

you roll over, propping yourself up on your elbows and knees, your entire lower half being visible to him. jake’s hands land on your ass, making you cry out in pain and pleasure. 

“holy shit, this looks so good,” jake groans out at the sight, “who’s pussy is this?” he spanks your ass again, the skin starting to turn red now. 

“i-it’s yours sir, only yours.” you tell him, looking at him over your shoulder. his whole demeanor was dominant and masculine as he grips his cock and slides it back into you. the stretch this time less painful than before, your walls practically suck him in. 

jake starts to thrust in and out of you. his balls slapping against your clit every time he shoves himself back inside of you. his alternates slapping your ass and gripping your waist so he can pull himself harder into you. you have to grip onto your sheets to not move up the bed from how hard he is fucking you. 

“god i love your pussy, fucking made for me, stretched out just for me to fit in perfectly.” jake grunts out to you. 

“fuck!” you cry out into your sheets, “i love your cock, sir, please keep fucking me.” 

jake places his hand on your back, holding your body down against the mattress as he fucks into you. your bedroom is filled with so many wet noises, skin slapping, and both of yours and jake’s moans. 

jake grabs both of your hands, putting them so they are on your ass, “hold your pussy open for me while i fuck you.” jake demands you. your fingers curl over the slope of your ass, pulling the skin so your pussy is more exposed for him to see how much he is filling you up. “that’s it, that’s a good girl just like that.” 

jake’s hands grip your waist, using it as a leverage for him to start fucking into you. he finds your sensitive spot better with this angle, making you cry out his name, want him to keep going and never stop. your fingers tighten on your skin, the pleasure making you need to have a hold of something as he fucks you. 

jake pulls out of you, his hands staying on your waist as he leans down and spits right onto your pussy. the action makes you cry out, makes you feel so dirty that it turns you on even more. 

your hands leave your ass as jake slides back into you again, his cock so hard and wet and heavy inside of you. your one hand goes underneath you and starts to rub your clit back and forth as jake continues as his hard and fast pace.

“fuck that’s a good girl,” his accent strong as he watches you rub your clit. 

“i’m gonna cum, sir!” you cry out, looking up at him from your head on your mattress. 

“that’s right, fucking give it to me like a good girl, cum all over my cock.” he nods back at you, his thrusts getting harder as he fucks right into your g spot. 

it only takes a few more thrusts for you to come undone on his cock, loud moans leaving your agape mouth. your eyes close as the pleasure washes through you. 

jake stills inside of you as he feels your walls compulse over his cock, his own moans increasing as he feels you cream all over his cock. he pulls him closer to his own orgasm. 

when the initial pleasure of your orgasm subsides, jake pulls out of you again, gently turning you over onto your back again. he starts to kiss all over your face and neck, wanting you to not drift off into subspace.

when your mind feels less hazy, you cup his jaw with your hand, bringing his lips to yours. you make out sloppily for a minute as your body recharges from the sensitivity of two orgasms. 

“want you to cum, sir.” you tell him, your voice quiet as you look into his eyes. 

jake doesn’t say anything as he kisses you again before he leans up. he grips his cock as he pushes inside your used pussy. a loud moan leaves his mouth once he’s back inside of you. 

“fuck you’re so creamy, baby. makes me feel so good.” he nods down at you, his cock starting to thrust in and out of you again. 

“just for you sir, only you.” you mumble to him, your hands gripping his upper arms that cage your body. your nails dig into his skin as he fucks you, getting himself off with your walls wrapped around him. 

“that’s right baby, only sir can fuck you this good, can stretch you out so fucking well.” his thrusts start to get sloppy as he continues to moan out to you, his thumb starts to flick your clit back and forth. “where do you want sir to cum, baby?”

your back arches at his touch on your clit, “on my face, sir. want you to make a mess all over me. make me a dirty girl.” 

“oh fuck,” jake grunts out, “you’re such a slut, such a fucking slut just for me.” jake could feel your walls start to tighten around him again, “you gonna cum again, baby?” 

you nod to him, your head moving against the mattress, messing up your hair even more. your body was sweating all over, his thumb on your clit drove you insane as he cock filled you up like never before. “yes sir, g-gonna cum.” 

this orgasm, your third one, was a lot softer than the first two. you made no noise as you came, the pleasure taking over your body so strongly. 

“fuck, that’s it, that’s it.” jake encouraged you, your walls suctioning around his cock, squeezing and creaming all over it. 

before you could even come down from your high, jake was pulling out of you. his hand jerking his cock at a fast pace as worked himself to an orgasm. 

“let me see your face,” jake demanded. you scrambled to your knees, lowering your face so his hard, red cock was over your face. “look at me.”

your eyes locked with his as you opened your mouth, wanting to catch some of his cum as he finally came. his grunts loud and mixed with curses and your name. his warm cum spurted and landed all over your face and tongue. 

“oh my god,” jake groans, watching his cum paint your face. he felt like he could cum again just from the sight. “fuck you’re such a good girl for me.” 

jake taps his sensitive cock on your tongue, letting your mouth enclose around it. you gently start to circle your tongue around the tip, wanting to clean up some of the mess he made. you could tell he was so sensitive, the way a long hiss left his mouth as he watched you. 

you popped his cock out of your once there was no more left over cum on his cock or in your mouth. jake leans down and kisses you, brushing your sweaty hair out of your face. “i’ll be right back, y/n.” 

you lay back on your bed as jake leaves to go to the bathroom. after a minute he comes back, a wet cloth in his hand. “let me clean you.” 

he starts with your face and neck, smearing off all his cum before it dries all over you. the sight of it makes his used cock twitch. then he trails the cloth down your body, teasing you almost before he spreads your legs. he gently wipes all the wetness in between your legs before he presses a kiss into your stomach and closes your legs again. he turns and leaves your bedroom. 

your eyes start to droop closed, tired from the activity that just occurred. 

you feel jake lay beside you, completely naked like you as he covers both of your bodies in your blanket. you feel his warmth beside you, and see how his bare chest moves up and down with each one of his breaths. 

jake’s the first one to break the silence. 

“i swear you’ll be the death of me.” 

you turn to look at his face, slightly sweaty with a red hue on his cheeks, “what do you mean?” 

“you’re just so hot, and sexy and cute. i never cum as hard as i do with you.” 

you bite your lip as you look at him, “you make me feel really good, jake. i’ve never came three times before.” both of you laugh, the feeling of your sore pussy leaves for a second as you hear his melodious giggle. 

jake’s eyes met yours and they turned serious, you heard him swallow harshly before speaking, “look, y/n,” his voice is soft but steady, “do you think we could do this again? i mean, i’d really like it if it could.” 

his question hung in the air, heavy with unspoken emotions. you thought about if it would be a good idea. thoughts of sunghoon and your friendship with him crossed your mind. but jake’s warm hand grazing across the thigh and the ache in your body reminded you that jake makes you feel good. “i want to, jake. but…” your voice trails off. 

“but what?” 

“but what about sunghoon?”

jake nodded against your pillow, “i get it. he’s our best friend, and i don’t want to hurt him or our friendship.” 

you sigh, your hand wrapping around jake’s bare torso, feeling unsure of when you would ever get to feel him again. “i know, it’s complicated. but i don’t want to give this up, jake. i want to see you again, wanna feel you again.”

jake leaned closer to you, pressing a kiss on your forehead. “we’ll be careful then. don’t worry about it, he won’t find out.”

you nodded against his chest, “okay, we’ll keep this between us for now– whatever this is.” 

you could feel jake smile on the top of your head. his arms wrapping around you and pulling your body against his. you hold each other close as sleep pulls you in. both of you tired and needy for each other. 

sunghoon crosses your mind for a second before you fall asleep. 

meanwhile, jake takes in the scent of your shampoo and laundry detergent, thinking about how lucky he is to have finally gotten you in some way. he’d like to call you his girlfriend one day– but he’ll take what he can get. and if sex and sneaking around behind sunghoon’s back is all you can give him, then he wouldn’t complain, as long as he gets to hold you close like this.

the morning light stream softly through your curtains. you stir in your bed from the sun hitting your eyes. you feel something warm wrapped around your waist and your eyes flutter open to see a tan arm tucked in. you suddenly remember your actions with jake from the night before. and how he is still currently in your bed. 

your eyes follow his arm to where his face was pressed against your pillow beside you. he is still relaxed in sleep, his dark hair tousled and a gentle smile playing on his lips. jake has always been very attractive, but right now he looks so handsome that it makes your stomach feel weird. 

from your subtle movements, jake’s eyes flutter open, meeting yours with a sleep affectionate gaze. "good morning," he murmurs, his voice husky from sleep. you hum back to him in response, your own smile on your face. 

but reality soon intruded on the serene moment. your heart skips a beat as you remember sunghoon. he must be home by now, and he would be awake any minute. panic flares in your chest, and you sit up abruptly, pulling the covers off yourself. "jake, we need to go," you whisper urgently, your eyes wide with alarm. "sunghoon can't know you stayed over."

jake's eyes widens with understanding, and he quickly moves to get dressed. you both scramble around the room, trying to be as quiet as possible. you glance at the clock, your heart racing. you have to be quick to avoid waking up sunghoon.

once you are both dressed, you tiptoe to the front door of the apartment. you open it slowly, making sure it doesn't creak. jake gives you a quick, reassuring kiss before slipping out. you watch him go, your heart heavy with a mix of longing and anxiety. you feel confused towards your feelings with jake. as soon as jake disappears around the corner, you close the door quietly, hoping you haven't made too much noise.

just as you are turning to head back to your room, you hear a voice behind you. "what are you doing?" sunghoon asks, emerging from his room and stretching. your heart skips a beat, but you quickly compose yourself, turning to face him with a casual smile.

"just...getting some water," you lie, trying to sound nonchalant. "i'm going back to bed now."

ou force a chuckle, feeling the awkwardness settle in your chest. "that sounds great. i'll see you later," you say, your voice slightly strained. you make your way back to your bedroom, closing the door behind you and leaning against it with a sigh of relief from avoiding sunghoon. but now, you need to think about what it is that you want with jake. 

a relationship that may or may not ruin your friendships with sunghoon? or a secret friends-with-benefits thing that seemingly would keep everyone happy? 

you sigh and know that it has to be the latter– despite the feelings in your heart that tell you you want more than just friends with jake.

a few weeks into your mutual-friends-with-benefits relationship with jake, your living room buzzes with laughter and chatter as you and sunghoon's friends gather for your a movie night. you and jake sit on opposite ends of the room, doing your best to act like just friends. it’s a delicate balance, hiding your feelings amidst the group. jake’s eyes occasionally flick over to you, a silent longing in his gaze that he tries to mask with casual conversation and laughter. you hope no one picks up on his staring. 

halfway through the movie, you feel your phone vibrate in your pocket. you discreetly pull it out and glance at the screen.

jake:[you look so good right now][8:57]

you bite your lip to suppress a smile. you look over at jake, who is watching you with a mischievous glint in his eyes. from across the room, you mouth, "stop." to him. 

jake:[please i need you so bad][8:58]

jake:[want my cock in your mouth][8:58]

you sigh, feeling your stomach start to flutter and know that you’re giving into him again.  you stand up, feigning a wince. "hey guys, i'm not feeling too well," you announce to the group, your voice wavering just enough to be convincing. "i think i'm going to head to my room and lie down for a bit."

concerned voices rise in a chorus, but you assure everyone you are fine and just need some rest. as you leave the room, you can feel jake's eyes on you, a promise that he will follow. you make your way to your bedroom, closing the door behind you, sitting on your bed and waiting for jake. 

the minutes feel like hours as you wait, the muffled sounds of the movie and your friends' laughter barely reaching you through the walls. eventually, you hear the sound of the movie ending and the goodbyes being exchanged. your heart races in anticipation to see him, to feel him.

finally, the apartment door clicks shut, signaling the departure of the last guest. moments later, your bedroom door creaks open, and jake slips inside, closing it softly behind him. the tension in the room shifts immediately, replaced by a charged, intimate atmosphere. jake crosses the room in a few quick strides, pulling you into his arms.

“hoon thinks i left,” he whispers, his breath warm against your ear. you laugh, burying your face in his shoulder. 

“i can’t stand seeing you and not being able to touch you.” you confess to him, your heart palpitating. 

“i know,” jake replies, pulling away to look at you, “i feel the same.” jake’s hand traces your jaw. 

you can’t look at him when you speak again, “i miss you when you aren’t with me. i think, i like you a lot more than just friends jake. a lot more than just hiding and, doing what we are doing.” 

jake feels like he could faint when the words leave your mouth. he’s had serious feelings for you since sunghoon had introduced him to you. it’s been so hard for him since he always thought you would never look at him more than just sunghoon’s other friend. but here you are, confessing your feelings to him first. 

jake doesn’t answer at first, he only pulls you closer to him, leaning down to kiss your now oh so familiar lips. you don’t reject his kiss, only allow yourself to relax into him. 

“i’ve liked you for so long, y/n. you have no idea.” 

“r-really?” 

“yes, since the day i met you.” 

you press your lips to his again, happiness filling both of you as you are hidden away in your room, away from the rest of the world and sunghoon. 

“now can you please suck me off? i’ve been hard since you walked out in those little shorts.”

you don’t hesitate to drop to your knees for him.

the next week, you and jake find yourselves feverishly making out on your couch. sunghoon has gone to the gym, giving you and jake a precious window of time to be together.

as soon as jake’s hands start to travel underneath your shirt, he front door opens unexpectedly. sunghoon steps in, gym bag slung over his shoulder, his eyes widening at the sight before him.

you and jake jump apart, your faces flushing with a mix of embarrassment and fear. you know you have been caught. sunghoon has seen the kiss, and there is no way to hide it now. "sunghoon, we can explain," jake begins, his voice filled with anxiety after a moment of silence between the three of you. all of you taking in what is happening. 

sunghoon sighs deeply, dropping his gym bag on the floor and sitting down in the chair across from you. "i know you guys have been seeing each other," he says, his tone surprisingly calm. a rush of guilt and anxiety washes over you and jake. you exchange worried glances, both certain that your friendship with sunghoon is over. 

"we're sorry," you say, your voice trembling. "we know you wouldn't want us together, and we didn't mean to betray you."

jake nods in agreement. "we just didn't want to hurt you or our friendship."

sunghoon shakes his head, a small, sad smile on his lips. "i'm not upset that you guys are together." you and jake look at each other in surprise.

"you're not?" you ask in unison, disbelief evident in your voices.

"no," sunghoon replies, his eyes meeting yours. "i'm upset that you guys didn't tell me. that you were sneaking around our apartment together and not letting me know."

you feel a pang of guilt. "how long have you known?" you ask, your voice barely above a whisper.

sunghoon sighs again, leaning back in his chair. "since i came back from that party when you were 'resting.' i heard you guys in your room."

you and jake feel a deeper sense of remorse. sunghoon has known from the beginning, and you underestimated him. "we felt like we couldn't tell you because we didn't want you to be caught in the middle if things went bad between us," jake explains, his voice filled with regret.

sunghoon shakes his head, a look of understanding in his eyes. "i don't care about that. i just care that both of my best friends are happy."

you stand up and move toward sunghoon, pulling him into a heartfelt hug. jake joins you, and for a moment, the three of you stand there, wrapped in an embrace that feels like a renewal of your friendship. you feel like the three of you can start fresh, but differently. differently in a good way. 

"we promise to tell each other everything from now on," you say, your voice thick with emotion.

"and no more sneaking around the apartment," jake adds with a chuckle, his relief evident.

sunghoon smiles, the tension lifting from his shoulders. "deal," he says, squeezing you both tightly. “but could you guys give me a warning before you guys have sex from now on, i’m so tired of putting earplugs in at 3am.” 

you cover your face in embarrassment, not being able to look at either of them as they burst out laughing together. 

maybe the mistaken text was a bad mistake after all if you have to deal with them making fun of your moans any longer.

@ taeghi, 2024. do not repost or reuse in anyway.

PLEASE REBLOG IF YOU ENJOY, AS LIKES MAKE IT HARD FOR WORK TO BE SPREAD AND ENJOYED BY OTHERS :)

stay safe everyone :)

𝑹𝒐𝒂𝒅 𝑻𝒓𝒊𝒑 - 𝑳. 𝑯𝒆𝒆𝒔𝒆𝒖𝒏𝒈

✿Pairing: heeseung + female reader!

✿Warnings: smut, pure filth, car sex, dirty talk, unprotected sex, cream pie, cum eating, breeding kink, daddy kink, male masturbation, cursing, implied round 2. (Since the daddy kink won on votes, I added it 🤭)

✿Genre: smut, 18+, read at your own discretion.

✿Summary: in which a road trip leads to you riding your friend in the back seat of a minivan, that’s literally it lol I didn’t add Niki for obvious reasons, and just to save any controversy, the last thing I need is drama in here.

✿Number of words: 3,184k

Find your way around!

You’re not sure whose idea it was to invite you and your best friend on the road trip or who thought it would be a great idea to travel in a minivan given the fact it only held seven people and there were eight people, including you and you’re also not sure why you agreed, but here you sat on one of your guy friends lap on a whole 4-hour road trip and halfway into the drive it was getting really uncomfortable more than uncomfortable.

Not only that but why the hell did you have to sit on heeseung’s lap? Couldn’t someone else sit there?

You didn’t even ask cause you knew they’d give you a bullshit excuse about you being smaller and weighing less.

You wouldn’t mind sitting on him in any other circumstance cause he was undoubtedly a hottie, but right now, your mind couldn’t even travel there as the pain in your body increased.

And on top of that, Jake and his girlfriend were practically sharing a seat, so why on earth were you crammed in the back with heeseung while Sunghoon told a series of terrible jokes?

You couldn’t believe how Jake and his girlfriend seemed to be having the time of their lives while in the seat in front of you in your same position, except your best friend was only halfway on jakes lap.

You wished you were having that much fun, but your back ached, and there was still a whole hour left. “Umm, can we stop? I have to use the bathroom,” heeseung spoke up. He had been quiet for most of the ride, only laughing awkwardly when you sat on his lap after muttering a small “hey,” which you returned just as awkwardly.

And little did you know heeseung was just as uncomfortable, if not more uncomfortable than you.

“Really, heeseung, can you just hold it? We’re almost there,” Jay piped up from the driver's seat.

No.

In fact, heeseung couldn’t hold it well. There was nothing to really hold other than the erection that was about to become very evident to you if he didn’t get a break real soon. “We’re not even almost there yet!” he shouted to the front seat, nearly blowing out your eardrum in the process.

“Be a man and use a bottle 'cause we’re not stopping,” Jay dismissed, and heeseung only groaned behind you.

Heeseung was doing alright for the next ten minutes, but once Jay ran over a bump and your ass brushed against his bulge, he couldn’t help but whimper. “Fuck” he whispered and clutched tightly onto the leather seats.

You were now fully aware of why heeseung wanted to stop and even more aware of what you were feeling under you, and you didn’t know if you should feel disgusted or flattered.

You supposed you were indifferent to the situation, and you tried shifting so you’d be sitting more on his thigh, but that seemed to make it worse as he squeezed your waist to hold you in place. “Please just stop moving,” he breathed out and rested his forehead on your back. “Shit, y/n, I’m sorry” He lowered his head in embarrassment. “Can we please take a break?” He spoke up, and Jay mumbled out a curse, finally pulling off at a gas station a few minutes out, although it was too late now that heeseung had already humiliated himself in front of you.

Heeseung practically threw you off his lap and hurried off to the restroom.

It was one outside the gas station around the back, and it was more than janky, but it’d have to do.

At first, he tried to make his erection go down by rinsing his face with cold water and taking deep breaths, even going as far to try and flex certain muscles in his body to make the blood go somewhere else, but no matter what, he could not stop imagining you sitting on top of him and it didn’t help that you had to wear shorts he knew it was like ninety degrees outside so he couldn’t blame you but still.

“Fuck” he moaned when he rubbed over the tent in his basketball shorts.

He quickly dropped them and his underwear on the ground fisting his cock at a fast pace. He had to hurry if he didn’t want anyone getting suspicious of him.

He bit his lip as he swirled his palm over his wet tip. “So fucking good, y/n” He closed his eyes, picturing you without those shorts on, wondering how good it’d feel for you to sit on his lap with nothing on. He’d love watching your perfect ass jiggle while you bounce on his big dick.

He had dreamed about it so many times he couldn’t even count. He knew it was wrong to like you cause you were only friends, but you made that extremely difficult for him, especially today.

He tugged at his balls, squeezing his sack softly while stroking his warm length. “Y/n, please don’t fucking stop” He was full-on fantasizing about you jerking his cock instead, wondering how you’d do it. Would you tease him? Would you do it nice and slow or rough and fast? Just the thought was getting him close. “Feels so good, baby,” he whispered.

Frankly, he wouldn’t care how you did it just as long as you were touching him.

“Hurry up, will you! I gotta go next,” he heard jakes voice outside the door and panicked.

“Shit” He knew if the guys knew what he was doing in here, they’d never let him live it down ever.

He quickly pulled up his shorts, tucking his erection in his waistband and hoping for the best.

“Sorry about that, it’s all yours” heeseung smiled awkwardly at Jake, hoping he wouldn’t notice anything, and to heeseung’s luck, he didn’t.

Now you, on the other hand, that’s a different story.

He avoided all eye contact with you and hopped in the back of the van while you left to buy something, he assumed, but just then, he got an idea. “Can I sit up front? I can give directions.”

“No!” They all said in unison, and he couldn’t help but wonder why all the guys were being such ass hats today. Just his luck.

But he did also get them lost when he was in control of the navigation on their road trip last year, so he supposed they had a right to respond that way.

Once you came out of the gas station, you made your way to the back, and heeseung peered out the window as if the scenery was just that beautiful, which it wasn’t. It was literally a dead-end gas station with flickering lights. You figured he must have just been embarrassed, but you understood it wasn’t intentional, and that just happens sometimes, and you didn’t judge him for it.

You sat on his lap once more, and Jay hit the road again. “Would you like some?” You offered him a drink of your ice-cold water, and if he’s being truthful, his body felt like it was on fire right now, partly cause you were sitting on his lap and the burning weather outside, so he accepted your offer.

“Thanks,” he whispers and drinks at least half the bottle in one go.

“I’m not disgusted by you or anything if that makes you feel any better,” you whisper to him, and you feel him tense up.

That definitely made him feel better, but it was still embarrassing for him.

You leaned back slightly, and you’re not sure if he had gotten hard again or he was still hard from earlier. You thought that’s why he went to the restroom to relieve himself. “Are you feeling any better?” you could only hope it didn’t make him more uncomfortable, but you just didn’t want him suffering for the next fifty minutes.

“Do you actually want to know the answer to that?” He whispers close to your ear so no one else would hear as his warm breath fans lightly across your face making you feel a shiver run up your spine.

“Yes,” you reply back in a whisper.

“No,” he replied honestly, and at this point, he’s been so hard for so long that it almost felt painful.

“I can help if you want?” You said boldly and pushed up against him a little, giving him a hint in case he didn’t know what you meant already.

You and heeseung were friends, yes, but that never once stopped you from thinking he was an attractive guy, and who cares? You were all on vacation to act crazy, party, and have fun, so why not start the fun right now?

Heeseung could have sworn he misheard, but he definitely saw the way you backed your ass up and pressed it on his aching length. “N-no, we’re almost there. I can take care of it later,” he politely declines.

You knew he was just being nice, but you really didn’t mind, and you can’t lie feeling his thick cock beneath your ass was turning you on, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t soaking wet right now. “Sure?” You gripped his knee and rotated your hips on his crotch teasingly, and he said fuck it and gave in.

He squeezed your hip with his right hand guiding you back and forth on his lap, groaning softly in your ear when your clothed ass brushed over his tip.

He grabbed your waist with his other hand pushing you down on his cock. You put your hands over his stopping his movement, and he was hesitant to do anything further in case he was making you uncomfortable. “Sorry, did I do something wrong?” You didn’t say anything. You lifted your hips and shimmied out of your shorts and underwear, and he gasped at the sight, watching a thick string of your arousal sticking to your thigh. though the sight was extremely hot to him, he didn’t want his friends to see you naked. “Are you crazy?” He whisper, yelled, and tried to cover your body with his hands. He looked around and thanked the stars that Sunghoon had fallen asleep beside him. Jake, his girlfriend, and Jungwon were too immersed in their game to care, and Jay was focused on driving while Sunoo was in the front seat giving directions which gave you and heeseung the green light.

“Relax,” you giggled and tugged at his shorts.

“Fuck okay,” he breathed out once he deemed it to be safe plus, nightfall had come already, so even if anyone did wake up, he could discreetly cover you and himself before anyone saw anything.

He pulled down his shorts, and you looked behind you while biting on your lip, looking at his huge dick resting on his abdomen.

You sat back down on his lap, dragging your pussy over his cock getting it nice and slippery so he could enter you with ease. “God baby, you’re so wet,” he mumbled in your ear groggily, already in a daze-like state from feeling your warm pussy gliding on his length. Evidently, he wasn’t the only one turned on.

He pushed his cock down at the base, sticking it between your legs, making it easier for you to grind on it. “So fucking big.”

“Yeah? You like that, huh?” He gripped your waist, now controlling the movement of your hips. “You gonna let me stick it in that pussy, baby? Wanna feel this big dick inside you? Hmm?” He kissed your neck sloppily while squeezing your hips.

“Yes, please,” you whined out, nearly moaning when you felt his tip poking at your quivering hole.

“Ooh, so polite” You could tell he was smirking by the tone of his voice. “You know just how to get what you want, huh, baby?” He nibbled your ear and bucked his hips up, pushing his cock past your tight entrance.

You had to cover your mouth to muffle your moan as you felt him stretching out your tight walls. You were thankful that he started out slow and let you adjust first cause he was huge. He slowly thrust in and out inch by inch until you could take all of it. He bit down on your shoulder softly and took a deep breath while he bottomed out. “You feel so good,” he moaned out after finally getting the relief he’s been needing for the past hour.

“You do, too” You swirled your hips while placing your hands on his knees to get a good angle to ride him. “Mmph,” you moaned.

“There you go,” he whispered, mesmerized by how you were swaying your hips in such a small space so effortlessly. “Just like that” He pulled his shirt up so he could watch his cock getting buried in your little cunt each time you moved back and forth on him.

He reached around you slipping his hands underneath your shirt to massage your tits, cupping them in his large warm hands and squeezing on them occasionally, not too rough but just right.

“Fuck heeseung,” he chuckled lowly in your ear.

“Like that? Having your tight little pussy filled with daddy’s dick?” Heeseung definitely made his dirty jokes here and there, but this was a whole new side of him you had never seen before. The filthy words coming from his mouth just made you wetter by the second.

“Mmh yes, Daddy,” he snuck a hand inside your bra, rolling your hard nipple between his fingers while he kissed on your neck.

“Shit, baby, you’re taking my dick so well” His comment made you clench down on his dick, squeezing your walls involuntarily. “Bounce on it,” he commands in a hushed voice, and you immediately obey, bouncing up and down on his cock just the way he ordered you to.

He breathily moaned in your ear, making you tighten your walls around him yet again. “S-so full” You could literally feel his dick everywhere inside you. The thickness brushing against your wet aching walls was absolute heaven.

“All for daddy’s girl” He dropped his right hand from your chest, cupping your mound with his palm before using his two fingers to massage your little swollen clit.

You threw your head back on his shoulder as he tugged at your sensitive nub.

“Gonna be good and let daddy breed his girl? Come on, baby, let Daddy fill you up. I know your little pussy wants it” He matched your pace when he felt your legs giving out, and he started bucking his hips into you, helping you ride him.

Luckily Jay had the radio on, and the quiet sounds of your guys' sweaty skin clapping against each other were drowned out.

“Yes, Daddy cum in me, please” You chewed on your lip, quieting your moans in the stifling van.

“Cum with Daddy, okay?” He said hurriedly, feeling high coming up on him.

“Hee- heeseung, I’m coming,” you breathed out.

“Oh god,” he grunted out. “Me too, y/n me t-too,” He spoke softly in your ear, and you felt his cock stiffen even more while he fucked into you and eventually spilled his seed inside you.

“Shit,” your squeak of a moan fell from your lips as he rubbed your clit in fast circles tipping you over the edge at the same time as him while his cock continued to ruin your spent pussy.

“Fuckkkkkkkk,” heeseung panted heavily in your ear as you felt his cock throbbing inside you and his warm ropes of cum staining your walls.

He didn’t think it was possible for an orgasm to feel so good, and to make it even better, your pussy just kept clenching on him nonstop, milking his dick for everything he had to give, which was a lot given the fact he hadn’t came in awhile.

“Fuck your cum into me, Daddy. Please, I’ve been a good girl for you,” you begged. Even though you were sensitive, you still needed to feel more of him.

“Fuck my girl is so dirty, such a naughty baby” He fulfilled your downright filthy wish, bucking his hip and fucking his cum back inside your used hole. He swiped his fingers over his length, collecting his release before holding it up to your mouth for you to suck on as he created a creamy mess between your sweaty bodies. “Does Daddy taste good?” You hummed around his fingers, and the lewd sticky sounds in the quietness of the van just made it ten times hotter you felt so dirty but so good at the same time.

Heeseung dared to look down and saw your pussy was nothing but a mess of his and your cum the creamy white ring around his base made him groan in pleasure as your pussy lips stretched around his length, taking everything he was giving to you.

After a few minutes, his cock had begun to soften, and he pulled out of you. You could feel his cum drip from your hole, and you put your hand under the small stream catching it in your palm once it leaked out of you.

You held your hand up to your mouth, licking it clean, refusing to let even a drop of him go to waste. “Such a good fucking girl for Daddy,” he breathed in your ear.

You looked back, smirking at him and showing him the creamy white on your tongue. “Let Daddy have a taste. Wanna have you on my tongue, baby” He gripped your jaw lightly, turning your face to the side so he could kiss you. You both kissed messily, playing with the liquid and passing it back and forth on each other’s tongues until it got lost in your guys' saliva and trickled down your throats. You both gulped each other's fluids down, humming in satisfaction before eventually pulling away.

You both pulled up your shorts and underwear once the post-orgasm clarity had kicked in, and the air was now quiet and peaceful heeseung’s hands fell on your waist. He then offered you some water, and you quietly accepted, swallowing the now room-temperature water.

He traced his hands over your belly, lifting up your crop top just a little to feel more of your skin on his fingertips as he kissed your neck occasionally.

You reached your hand back, tugging him forward by his neck, allowing him to press more wet kisses all over your exposed skin.

You’re not sure who rolled the windows down, but you were both so thankful when the cool breeze hit your warm skin. Both of you released a breath from the relaxing feeling of the chilly night air.

You cupped your other hand over his and ran your fingers through his dusty blonde hair. “We should do this again when we get to the hotel,” he hums against your neck. “Want to?”

“I’d love to,” you whisper, and you can feel him smiling on your skin.

So maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea, after all, to accompany the boys on their road trip.

FIN.

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