Lucas And Jens Have Been Dancing Around Each Other For Months, Since Lucas Came To Antwerp, But A Too

flash warning

another one cause I’m proud of my improved editing skills

📂📂📂📂idc what u write about i just want some elippo angst !! cause i love being in pain!

The first time Elia and Filippo break up, it’s about ten months into their.. whatever. The whatever is because Filippo absolutely refuses to label what they have as a relationship or a friendship or even a hookup-manship. Elia exists solely as his… well as Elia. And he’s content with the whatever it is, as it stands. No rules, no exclusivity, nothing to add weight to the idea of permanence, of ownership. He’s perfectly content to ride out their intense connection for as long as they can as is.

Elia thought he was fine with that for a long time. He was delighted that he could have Filippo whenever he wanted, but also felt no pressure to refrain from experimenting, to see and flirt and kiss pretty girls and pretty boys whenever he wanted. It also didn’t hurt that often he and Filippo were in it together, pointing out pretty young things for the other to seduce. A sort of modern romantic game.

But then the weeks and months pass, and Elia is now spending more time in Filippo’s bed than his own. His phone is now full of silly pictures of Filippo and texts to Filippo and texts about Filippo and well-

Elia is tired of this nebulous thing. 

It’s easy to him. He wants Filippo and he hasn’t wanted anyone else for a long time. (To be quite honest, he doesn’t think that he’s ever really wanted anyone else since meeting him.)

So he begins to broach the topic of a real, real relationship. First as a joke when they’re both drunk off their asses and climbing each other on the bed (”just think, this could be yours and only yours… what do you say?”) The next time is over a random text conversation (”I was thinking we could do like a couples vacation with Martinico?”) 

Finally, Elia brings out the big guns. He dresses nicely and cooks a good dinner with all of Filippo’s favorite things (things he knows because believe it or not, he knows almost everything about Filippo and he knows Filippo knows all of this about him too). He opens wine and lets is breathe and greets a wary Filippo with a kiss when he walks through the door.

It takes almost every ounce of courage in Elia to do it. To air all of his wants and dreams and hopes for them as a couple on the table. To look intimidating, strong Filippo in the eye and know that he might be costing himself the greatest relationship he’s ever had. But he does it because he knows that they could be so much more than they are. The same, but stronger. Better. 

So he lays it all out. 

And Filippo remains silent. Wine glass clenched in his hands, coffee-brown eyes averted. When he finally does speak, his voice is hoarse and simple, “I can’t… I can’t do this. We work just how we are. Don’t complicate things. Please, Elia. Just leave it alone.”

Elia thinks he can hear his heart actually break. He wonders if Filippo can hear it too. 

But the thing is, he loves Filippo more than he ever thought he could love anyone, but he also knows that he can’t do this anymore. He can’t bask in this relationship, immerse himself in this love, if Filippo already had one foot out the door.

So Elia sniffs, and gently gets up from the table and walks out the door. 

Skam Italia - To Build A Home “Once you wrote in a paper that everyone of us is convinced to move towards the sky, without…

Midnight Rain

𝐽𝑎𝑐𝑎𝑒𝑟𝑦𝑠 𝑉𝑒𝑙𝑎𝑟𝑦𝑜𝑛 𝑥 𝑓𝑒𝑚!𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟

𝑊𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠: female reader/description, canon divergent, brief mentions of smut, abandonment (committed by reader), angst, use of Y/n

𝑆𝑦𝑛𝑜𝑝𝑠𝑖𝑠: Despite the love she harboured, she wanted more beyond that of a princess' court life, with a need for a pain that called louder than the lulls of simple comfort.

𝑊𝑜𝑟𝑑 𝐶𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡: 4003

Blog Masterlist

Disclaimer: I know there is another author who has a oneshot of the same title and pairing, but this was not deliberately taken from her! I was just listening to the song and got some inspiration.

A/N: live laugh love, angst <3 there will be a pt 2! I'm so sorry for not posting, apparently holidays make it harder to write

TO SAY THE PRINCE OF DRAGONSTONE CARED FOR HIS LADY WAS MORE THAN AN UNDERSTATEMENT. Lady Y/n mattered to him more than his station, his future crown, Seven Hells, perhaps the realm. They were not officially betrothed, not yet at least, but it was clear to anyone that they were more than friends. One could even call them lovers, but it is the weight of the name and the youth of their souls that they could not properly bear the title, not to its truth. Nevertheless, the two were an inseparable pair, who longed for sweet kisses and the thrill of young love. Many could claim it was fleeting, that it would pass, and in some circumstances, they had a right to those words. But no one could deny the way the prince looked at her. He lit up like that for no one else, he would show no such ardour to another.

The Lady Y/n was born to a House of a minor lord. When her father visited the Red Keep, she’d followed him dutifully. She didn’t know what was to become of her then. While her father talked to King Viserys over the matters of his affairs, the little girl was approached by a young Jacaerys. He offered to play with her, to which she gladly accepted. Before him, she’d been sitting outside the council room with nothing to do but awkwardly reciprocate the waves directed to her from passer-by. The prince was delighted to discover the lady’s true nature, a bright girl with large aspirations and big dreams, contrary to the coldness from beforr. He would listen intently while she spoke, a habit that remained even as they grew older.

“I’m going to be king one day,” Jacaerys declared proudly. “I will rule over everyone in Westeros.”

At that, Y/n had gaped. “Even me?”

Jacaerys wrinkled his nose in thought, tilting his head sideways. Then, he lit up. “Since I’ll be the ruler, I can make any rules I want and everyone has to listen. You can do whatever you want when I am to be crowned. Promise.”

“Wow!” Y/n exclaimed in awe. “I want to be a warrior. Like Queen Visenya. I shall slay all my foes on the battlefield!”

“Then I shall send you my armies!” Jacaerys suggested excitedly.

From that moment onward, the two had decided to be great friends. Of course she and her father had to return home, but after relentless begging from both parties, she was sent back to the capital for a visit. Jacaerys had never been happier upon the return of his new friend, and Princess Rhaenyra noticed it. She proposed an idea to Y/n's father; let her become a ward under the Targaryens. It was a great honour, no doubt, and to receive the invitation directly from the Iron Throne's heir, there was no way he could refuse. Besides, there was an obvious hint of betrothal, and to be connected to the family that ruled all over the Seven Kingdoms? He might as well been blessed by the gods.

At this news, the children were overjoyed. They couldn't believe it. At first, many nobles chided the princess and the lord for making a foolish decision. The two were barely strangers, only meeting for bare days. Surely they would grow bored, as children do. But the arrangement only solidified the fast-growing bond between them. Proximity was a gift, and so were Y/n's goals. Aforementioned, she wished only to be a powerful warrior of her own right, and without any obstacles, she could get there. She was fierce, determined, even as a girl of youth. But that was what she was. A girl.

Luckily for her, her caretaker happened to be in a similar situation. Rhaenyra had been faced with much slander and restriction, due to her role being the future ruler, but as a woman. She decided Y/n would have what she desired, without any objection. From then on, she provided Y/n with whatever she needed, training lessons, in swordsmanship, hand-to-hand combat. The young lady has never been happier. Her old home was all tradition, sit still, look pretty, do not speak unless spoken to. Her only friends were empty-headed people, ones she couldn’t talk to, much less play a decent game with. Here, she was free, a bird with lavish wings, able to soar as fast and high as she wished. And she could do it alongside Jacaerys.

Much to the court’s surprise, Y/n was proficient. With a blade she was as swift as the wind, graceful as trickling water. She could easily attack and disarm. Additionally, she exceeded with a bow and riding horses. It was in unbefitting of a girl her position, they would say, but she ignored it all. They were almost as persistent as she. “She is such a lovely girl, any man would steal a chance of wedding her. Shame she is so unruly.” Many words like that had come at the expense of her training, but she easily ignored them. Similar to her, Lady Baela, who enjoyed the same things and endured the same remarks. Aside from her first friend, Y/n had begun to seek comfort from her too. She would settle in comfortably.

Over the passing moons, Y/n grew, as a child does. Her face has lost remnants of past infancy, and parts of her figure had filled out pleasantly. But she still retained the same glint in her eye. She had Jacaerys tripping over his feet.

He’d always liked her, as friends do. Her face was pleasant, he liked her. Platonic. Unfortunately, no one can push away feelings, nor can they reactions of the human body. After their years together and her stupidly pretty face, he was completely smitten. She always had a sneaking suspicion, and he made it clearer when his confidence grew. Of course she felt the same way, only she was better at hiding it. Jace was all mooney eyes and wide smiles. Y/n was stolen glances and hidden grins.

And perhaps an example of her admiration was the day those two younglings finally admitted the affection they held for one another. It was hot, the weather humid and balmy. Y/n had decided to skip training that day, and instead take up her time reading in Jacaerys' room. He was bent over his desk, poring over his endless studies to better himself as a candidate for the throne. She was seated on his bed, her eyes straying away from the pages of her novel. She couldn’t help but notice. Delicate pearls of sweat collected on his forehead, the glorious shape of his nose, the way his brow furrowed when he didn’t understand something. Gods damn her, she loved to see his hands work, the protruding veins and the flex of his fingers. She watched silently. He was beautiful.

Jacaerys thought it was too good to be true, yet he felt like something was staring at him and he let himself imagine. For a few moments he didn't look back, until his mind itched him to do so. He glanced to his left from the corner of his eye. His teeth pressed into his bottom lip to prevent the emerging smile. She was looking.

"Y/n," he suddenly said, sounding nonchalant as he flipped through another scroll. "Are you... staring at me?"

She froze, immediately turning away and lying back down as if she did nothing. "I was not."

Jace chuckled. He rose and pushed his chair into the desk and made his way to sit at her feet. "You were."

"I was not."

"You were."

Y/n shut her book completed and set it aside on the table next to his bed. She crossed her legs. "I would never."

"And yet you did," he flashed her a smile that she needed to slap off simply because it was so infuriatingly enticing. He crawled closer, and her eyes narrowed. "You were looking for a very long time, I'd wager."

"I didn't!" she insisted. She was not usually like this, and she wouldn't ever be caught again.

He caught her chin with his forefingers, a sudden surge of confidence washing over him. He made her look straight into him, forcing her to stare deep into his sweet brown irises. "Now you are."

Y/n was glaring profusely, but Jace ignored it and kept on smiling. She was about to open her mouth in protest. Whatever words she planned to say were cut off by the swift movement of his lips on hers. It was chaste, and invoked a flurry of... whatever the tingly feeling was in her stomach. He pulled away, looking terribly pleased with himself.

"So?" he grinned deeper. "Up to your liking? Or-

She had pulled him in by his collar and kissed him again. It was faster, more aggressive. He had nipped at her lip, making him able to slip his tongue into her mouth. He groaned, squeezing her waist tightly. This went on for awhile, until they expectedly had to part. She refused to look him in the eye, but he merely laughed, moving beside her. Jace wrapped an arm around her shoulders and kissed the side of her head. She didn't reply, but settled in his arms contentedly and picked up her book again.

From that moment onward was a change to their dynamic. Well, the basis of it was the same as it always had been. But there was change in the kisses they shared, the way he touched her, how he gazed upon her like she was the Maiden come upon earth. Though in the end, they were alway going to be Jace and Y/n. She would talk, he would listen. He constantly spoiled her with gifts, while she enjoyed gifting him with her time. He would embrace her, and she would accept.

Jacaerys made her feel like none other, like she could be safe and secure. But her traitorous heart loved rush and thrill. That's why she found so much pleasure when he would pull her into a dark hallway, trying to stay quiet as he lifted her skirts above her knee, the risk of it all. She had not forgotten her childhood wish, to be like Queen Visenya Targaryen. She wanted to go out into far lands, to feel the sting of swords and the bite of spears. Y/n had spent so much time pent up in the old walls of her childhood home, bound in the chains of expectations, her spirit could not be satisfied with the life he offered her. Inevitably, Queen of the Seven Kingdoms. She knew it would be anytime soon, and she would have to choose between her dreams, or her beloved.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

CURLS OF STEAM WAFTED OFF THE TOP OF Y/N'S BATH. Her day was long and strenuous. Criston Cole had been bitter the last time she beat him, and put in twice the amount of effort in their spar today. Men and their egos, she sighed as she dropped off her clothes and lowered herself into the tub. The hot water seeped on top of her battered skin.

"Anything else you require, my lady?" asked the maid that stood dutifully at the side of the tub. She had a towel hung over her arm.

"No need," Y/n responded. "Leave the towel by the basin. You need not stay."

"Very well, my lady," the maid replied. She neatly folded the towel and placed it as Y/n instructed. Before she left, she curtsied politely to her mistress.

The scented oils were relaxing. She dipped her hair back into the water and shut her eyes. And that was how she remained for the next moments, completely in her peace. Until the footsteps.

She recognised them. An attempt at silence, but still steady and noticeable.

"Jace," she murmured, sitting up.

She heard his laughter. "How do you always guess?"

"Because I know you," she replied. She was greeted with his handsome face beaming down at her.

"Smart girl," he remarked. He dragged a small stool over behind the tub, sitting on it and leaning forward. "Did you fare well today?'

"T'was wel-" she paused when he left small kisses on her shoulders, leading up to her neck. She could feel his smirk against her skin. "T'was well enough."

“Good,” he kissed her cheek. “I shall not bother you any longer. I have work to do as well.”

“Stay awhile,” she requested. “Just a minute.” It was not the norm for her to ask such a thing, though to Jacaerys it was a welcome surprise.

“Very well, my sweet,” he kissed her head.

Oh how she despised herself. The feeling when she was with him was so comfortable. Too comfortable. It was sleeping in a soft, plush bed, until you sank into the mattress and became smothered by the sheets. Jace would never do that to her, he understood how she went about things and what she didn’t want. But she knew the more she restrained herself, the more it would feel that way.

“Y/n I must go now, I’m afraid,” he brought up after the minute flew by. “Mother expects me to bring her these scrolls at the end of the night.”

“Go,” she urged.

“Shall I see you after supper?”

“Yes.”

After supper was their time of indulgence. He had ignored honour, for the first time in his life, and taken her maidenhead in one heated night, where both could no longer push away the desire and heat that gnawed at their guts. Jacaerys had become good at it, knowing exactly how to please her. During those times a she would let go of everything, think no thoughts, succumb herself to him.

Not tonight. Even when his head was buried deep between her legs, her mind was still on her endless debacle. She wanted to be with him terribly, but there was so much more she yearned for.

Jacaerys sensed the difference in her behaviour, she was not reacting like she would. He held her thigh in his grip, lifting it onto his shoulder as he managed to find a deeper angle. Nothing. He frowned and pulled away, gently laying her leg down.

“Why’d you stop?” She asked, as if she hadn’t been listless the entire time.

Jace's handsome features were concerned as he went to kneel beside her. But his lips glistened so enticingly she leaned forward to kiss him, though he managed to escape it. “Do not try and escape this, Y/n. Something plagues your mind.”

“Nothing plagues me,” she denied. “I am content. Do it again.”

“I shall not,” he was stubborn as she was, and sometimes she hated it. “You are clearly having a debacle over something in that pretty head of yours. I intend to know what it is. You never let me help you, my sweet,” he slid onto the bed, kissing her head. “Allow me now.”

“It is mere fatigue,” she answered.

“Fatigue?” He didn’t quite believe her.

“I overworked myself today,” Y/n lied. “I extend my apologies. You were… doing well.”

“Well,” he repeated.

Y/n turned around. “You excelled. Is that what you’d like to hear from me?”

“Very much so,” he chuckled and kissed her head again. “Perhaps I shall give you a prospect to think about? A good one, do not worry. I should hope you will like it.”

“Mm… what?”

Jace's head drooped down to the level of her ear. "Marry me."

Oh.

Oh poor, unknowing, innocent Jace. He had unintentionally made things worse now. Dread settled into her stomach. It felt harder to breathe.

“I…”

“I do not expect you to answer me now,” he quickly interjected. “I know marriage is the last thing you have on your mind. And even if it is only a betrothal, I understand it is a hard choice for you to make. Though, I would love nothing more than for you to be my queen, my wife."

Y/n had to fight back the stinging tears. The choice was impossible to her. Marrying him was betraying her dreams, but going out and listening to her head would betray Jacaerys. She felt his lips press to her temple, and how he rubbed her arm to calm her down.

“I need time,” she answered, trying to keep her voice under control from breaking.

“Of course,” Jacaerys replied. His eyelids fluttered. “It appears I am fatigued too. Will you mind if I retire in your chambers tonight?"

“Not at all,” she smiled weakly. He liked to spend time and sleep in her bed sometimes. Not a lot of people were pleased about it, but there was not much that they could do.

He kissed her goodnight, removed his shirt and slipped under the covers, miraculously falling into a deep sleep instantaneously. She watched the rise and fall of his chest, the prominence of dark lashes against his skin. And the dam burst.

Y/n had never felt so helpless. She clamped a hand over her mouth as she sobbed heedlessly. Her breaths were shaky, her fingers trembled. She was being dramatic, wasn’t she? Any lady with a brain would immediately choose a prince. Why couldn’t she? She should. He was right there, and he was utterly devoted to her. The thought of it plunged her into a deeper abyss.

It wasn't as if she had an opportunity to go out anyway. But marrying Jace meant tethering herself there forever. And even if she were allowed to venture out, she would always have to return. She would never be truly free with that.

It took several moments to recollect herself. Y/n wanted to cry more, but that wouldn’t solve anything. Perhaps in the morning, after a night’s rest, she could consider things.

Night’s rests were overrated.

By morn, she’d felt more awful than ever. How could she do this to her Jace? They loved each other so deeply, no doubt, but she still would question accepting his proposal. She wanted that warrior's life for so long, even thinking about settling, having to be trapped within stone walls til she died squeezing out a babe, she would shudder.

When she awoke he had already left. Jacaerys used to be notorious for sleeping in, but ever since he started taking his responsibilities seriously, he rose just as the sun did. Y/n was glad he did. Seeing his face would wrench her heart.

Soon, her two maids walked in to help her ready herself. They drew her a bath, picked out her dress and her jewellery. Y/n normally insisted upon doing things herself, but she allowed them to do it all. Their expressions were telling too, even the servants of the household knew that the lady wasn't behaving as she typically did.

"Thank you," she spoke to them after they were finished. She stared at herself in the mirror. A lady. A lady who belonged in the confines of court.

Her room walls were closing in.

Y/n pushed her doors open and stomped out into the halls. The King's Landing air was balmy and thick. She walked and walked, ignoring anyone passing her. Her dress seemed to constrict her stomach, her throat tight. She couldn’t be here anymore. Not for duty, not even for Jace.

She walked and walked. Until she stopped. Voices. Y/n had not realised she'd found herself at the doors to the council room.

“… resurfacing in the Stepstones.” That was Daemon.

Her curiosity was magnetic. She tiptoed closer, peeking through the crack and bringing her ear closer to listen.

"The Triarchy?" Jace. "I thought you extinguished them years ago. It was to my information that grandsire Corlys secured the area for us not two years past?"

"The Triarchy are cowards," Daemon snarked. "They fear us, they would never make another attempt on their own, but they have made an alliance. A new group. The scouts I sent out report back emerging ships. We shall uncover their identity soon enough."

"What do you suggest?" came Rhaenyra's voice.

"Send out men," Daemon replied. "A few hundred or so to battle off the newcomers. If the situations grows dire, we send in more. It could lead to another war... but securing the Stepstones are important. However we should send them as soon as we can, on the morrow, I'd venture. Prepare them tonight."

This was her chance. She could get out and fight. Any rational thinking was gone. She couldn't be here forever, she couldn't live the life of a princess and be made to serve men or constantly birth babes. She listened more. Daemon would send out men, and they would board the royal fleet at the harbour by dawn.

And Y/n would be going with them.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

NOBODY SAW HER OVER THE COURSE OF THE DAY. Y/n had skipped all her meals. She was packing, taking with her what she would need. She planned her escape, when to leave, how she would disguise herself. By the time she was ready to leave, the moon glowed and the stars winked at her on the pitch blank expanse of the sky. Despite the slight shake of her hands, she couldn't help but feel liberated. She was chasing her childhood idea, the one dream she would desperately cling to each night.

She would sneak aboard the royal fleet before the rest of the men came, and hide for most of the journey. Just a few more things into her satchel, clothes, a dagger, a waterskin. She also owned a beautiful carved sword, a present from Jacaerys. Jacaerys.

"Y/n?"

Oh no. This couldn't be happening, he wasn't meant to be sleeping. It was like she summoned him herself. She was certain he had gone to bed.

"What are you doing?" He sounded so accusatory she could feel the guilt resurfacing.

Now was not the time for regret. It had to be done.

“I’m leaving, Jace," she finally said.

“Leaving where?”

“The Stepstones.”

He frowned. “How did you know-

“It doesn’t matter,” she interrupted. “I want this. I need this. This life it- it does not suffice, not to me. I cannot continue like this. I can’t- I can’t be your wife, Jacaerys.”

Any light from his sweet brown eyes died. She spied his fists curling. “W-Why not?” His voice cracked. Y/n had never seen him so upset before, not since the death of Ser Harwin. “I would let you go and fight, Y/n. I could- I could make you happy.”

“I would always have to come back here,” she tried to keep her volume down. “I would always have a duty. I do not want that duty. I cannot go off on my adventures, always knowing I must return and fulfil what makes me unhappy. I must take the path I want.”

“Let me go with you, then,” he pleaded, stepping forward as tears sprung from his eyes.

“You cannot do that!” she exclaimed. “Your destiny was always meant to rule the Seven Kingdoms. You must stay and be Prince of Dragonstone. For you, that is where duty comes first.”

“Duty has never came first with you.”

She looked away. “Don’t.”

He took his steps toward her, cupping her cheeks in his warm hands. “I cannot understand this at all, Y/n. I know you want to be a warrior, to fight for honour and glory, and I would never forsake that from you. But you are giving up on what we have built upon all these years. I do not want to lose you.”

Now the tears fell. His thumb stroked them away, but he was equally as saddened.

“This is best for me,” she whispered, pulling away.

“Y/n, I beg of you-

“I’m sorry, Jacaerys.”

She hurriedly took her things and began to leave. He was left standing there, watching. Y/n looked back. “I’m sorry.”

Tags: @jacespookiebear @januarybella @kimm4710

Published: Wednesday 12th July 2023

I am not a child of the lord and neither am I gods strongest soldier. He is sinful. This should be illegal, Harry you lucky bastard.

Snap buttons, HE KNEW WHAT WOULD HAPPEN AND STILL WENT FOR THE SHIRT AND WENT FOR THE BARRICADE FOR KMM. UNHINGED. FERAL. CRIMINAL.

Currently crying

dinsdag 7:27

“You’re not alone”

🤣

“You’d probably be still chasing Jens like a horny lapdog”

i c o n i c

It’s like as soon as I have something else to work on, all I want to do is write fic… So okay, who am I to fight my impulses?

***

The smell of food wafted through the air as Filippo pushed open the front door to the apartment and he paused as he set down his camera bag. Eleonora’s cooking certainly didn’t smell like that on a regular basis. The chances of it being his mom were also slim, and he headed for the kitchen, poking his head curiously around the corner.

A smile spread over Filippo’s face as he caught sight of Elia, his back to the door, stirring something on the stove.

“What are you doing?” Filippo asked, stepping inside and watching Elia whip around, spoon clattering on the stovetop, as though Filippo surprised him.

“Fuck, Filo, make a sound next time,” Elia said, letting out a breath, but he didn’t seem upset, dipping his finger in something on the stove and holding it out. “Here, taste this.”

Amused but not surprised, Filippo stepped forward obediently, licking the white sauce off of Elia’s finger. He caught Elia’s wrist, holding him steady, meeting Elia’s smirk.

Keep reading