Reblog If You Think Asexuality Is A Legitimate Sexuality.

this blog hates donald trump

Look how many people hate him. I’m pretty damn happy about that 😁😁😁😁😁😁

Sometimes I like to think of myself as "Female Lite" or "Diet Female" because while I do identify as a cis woman, it just doesn't really feel important. As if my gender was more diluted than usual. Just enough gender that I can tell there's femaleness in there, but my gender is to femininity as LaCroix is to fruit juice.

i feel so seen!!

(twitter thread)

I have a story for you.

I was at a family reunion (or something like that), and I was 3 or 4 years old. My mom was talking with one of my uncles-cousins-relatives-I-guess (as grown-ups do) when I walked up to ask a Very Important Question (I don't remember what this Question was, but it probably had something to do with cats. I love cats).

Anyway, the grown-ups were not paying attention to me, and toddler me was Not Happy with this. So naturally, I grabbed at the nearest grown-up hand to joggle it like a snow globe. The problem is, said hand was occupied at the time.

With a lit cigarette.

Now, I don't think I got seriously hurt - I sure don't see any scar left over - but at that age I'd cry at a paper cut, so I let out an ear-scraping screech. Naturally, that drew attention from the entire room (unfortunately for me, my Very Important Question was completely forgotten, so I couldn't capitalize on the opportunity).

As my mom soothed me and worried over me, my relative of uncertain relationship frantically asked where I was hurt. And so, with tears in my eyes and a ferocious pout, I presented my reddened, stinging middle finger.

i am sick! and grumpy! and fully of mucus!!! and if anyone wants to buy me some ramen and/or tell me a story of humorously blundering childhood mishaps, that would be most pleasing indeed!

So if I'm reading this right, the family consists of:

- King Dededad

- Zero vacation days Samus

- and Ness

I think this is my favorite post on the Internet right about now! Edit: And I just needed to Edit this Photo 4 TIMES till it worked here… #youarewelcome #tumblrnoob #learnhowtotumblr

I, apprentice wizard JelloMortality, support my brethren in the skeleton wars!

I JOIN THE SKELETON WAR ON THE SIDE OF THE WIZARDS

NYOHOHOHOHOHO~✨

LINK TO SKELETON WAR GUIDELINES

LINK TO SKELETON SIGN UP (HARRUMPH)

LINK TO OUR SPELL BOOK

LINK TO A COOL DOG

HOW TO PARTICIPATE

1: IF YOU WANT SKELETONS TO ATTACK YOU, COMMENT ON THIS POST ABOUT HOW BLAND AND DULL THEIR ARMOR LOOKS

2: GO OVER TO THE SKELETON SIGN UP POST, INVADE THE INBOXES OF ANYONE WHO MINDLESSLY COMMENTS, AND CAST A SPELL ON THEM (YOU SHOULD USE SPELL SUMMON BEAR)

3: POST ABOUT THE SKELETON WAR AND USE TAGS #skeleton war #skeleton war 2022 AND ALSO #wizardposting #wizard council

4: (OPTIONAL) BLAZE ONE OF YOUR SKELETON WAR POSTS TO ATTRACT MORE RECRUITS. IT IS IMPORTANT THAT YOU LINK TO THE GUIDELINES IN YOUR BLAZED POSTS

Tags by @biggest-gaudiest-patronuses

"clones" identical twins? you are describing identical twins with a birth delay

Let me answer your question with a question: is autocannibalism still cannibalism?

is biting your fingernails vegan? i want to hear debate on this

The point of officially naming a pet is not to actually use that name but to have a baseline from which to come up with every conceivable nickname to call them instead.

... yeah, that sounds horrible enough to be Hell

meteorologically speaking, Hell’s atmosphere is mostly composed of fire and brimstone, right?