Bill Brandt

Lee Hall, Winter Sky

PAFA

Watercolor on rice paper mounted on off-white wove paper

Gift of the Betty Parsons Foundation

The history of the devil and the idea of evil, 1900 

when I was nine

I begged God to cease my existence.

in that cold night

while I looked at the yellowish street lights

that came through my windows

I felt ignored by the Creator

tears streamed down my face

I passed out hoping to be a child again

or to be

nothing

I thought God hadn't listened to me

but now I realize he did

everyday I get smaller and weaker

pound by pound, I disappear

everyday my memories get blurred

as if I was an empty receptacle

of a soul that has never been beared

my lust was everything I had left

but it's slowly making its way out of my flesh

ripping my body, breaking my ribcage

trying to get away from the hell

I have became

virtues and sins are disgusted by what I am

I am becoming a cold shell that

kids throw back on the ground

when they can't hear the waves inside me

like the shell,

I am what's left from what once existed

my duty on earth is to disintegrate

so when I look at myself in the mirror,

perceive I'm slowing fading away

and my bones are popping out

I finally feel like I have accomplished

something

Lee Ranaldo of Sonic Youth’s old notebooks

The Color of Pomegranates, Sergei Parajanov, 1969

“Intrapolis” (Funnel town) by Walter Jonas. 1960

Simone de Beauvoir, January 9, 1908 – April 14, 1986.

My albums selection for the week :

- Ministry ‎ :  Animositisomina

- ohGr ‎ :  SunnyPsyOp

- Rawzilk  :  Nodevillivedon

- Pan Daijing ‎ : A Satin Sight

- Helena Hauff :  Qualm

- Moonspell ‎:  The Butterfly Effect

- Rico  ‎:  Sanctuary Medicines

- Schwanzmonster ‎ :  Know Your Place

- Isotropia  :  Borderline Negation

- Siouxsie And The Banshees : Join Hands 

Phil Elverum  photography

purchase Phil’s art book at: pwelverumandsun.com