Hello🤍,

Update!!!

I'm sorry for not posting anything on here or ao3 for the past week. I was in an area with little to no internet, so I couldn't update even if I wanted to, and I forgot to inform you guys of this before leaving for the 4th. I'll try to get stuff back up and running this week, and I hope it wasn't too much of a wait!

Small Tang au ramble.

Along with the new A World Without Him chapter, I just want to shout out jinglingeyes for always commenting on my Tang Au chapter posts. Stupid Tumblr doesn't let me reply, so I wanted to show my appreciation through this. I always love seeing your comments, and I can't wait for your reactions to the latest chapter! I hope you and all my other readers have a good day/night!

A World Without Him

Chapter 19

The air around them stilled, heavy with anticipation. Tang just held his hands together and bowed his head, trying to avoid the stares from everyone around him. When the silence from these people started to go on for a bit too long, he took a chance and glanced up at the bed, seeing Zach staring right back at him. The kid's face was contorted into some sort of grimace.

Aggressive Guy spoke up first. “Are we gonna start this thing, or are we just gonna sit around with our heads up our asses?”

A glare was shot at him from Red Hair, but the old man across from Tang just gave a small chuckle at the outburst. “Alright. I suppose everyone here must have a lot on their mind as we haven't had to do this sort of thing before. Why don't you give us a start, Ms. Manex?” The man asked with a small smile, both his hands settled on the wooden cane in front of him.

The soldier next to Tang stiffened and blinked a few times at the statement. Regaining herself quickly after, she gave a quick nod to the man and gestured to Red Hair. Once Red Hair gave the clipboard away, Manex stepped slowly up to the bed, staring intently at the papers in her hands.

She gave a quick cough before starting her questions. “Ahem. To start off, I want you to confirm the information given to our medical staff to stave off any misunderstandings. Your name is Zach Song, correct?”

The kid answered with what sounded more like a wheeze than anything, his eyes squinting at her as he did so. Manex bit her lip and kept her eyes glued onto the clipboard. “Uhm, I'm sorry, but could you repeat that for me?”

He wheezed again, louder and more scratchy than before as he turned his head to the side to face her, revealing bloody bandages lining his neck and chest. Tang grimaced at the sound, still staring at the floor himself while squeezing his hands tighter together.

Manex, however, seemed to be frozen in place. Her lip was close to bleeding with how much force she was using as she only stared at her clipboard, motionless.

The old man observed as Red Hair carefully stood up and turned Manex away from the bed. She took the clipboard back into her own hands and positioned Manex back at her place next to Tang, turning back to the bed herself as Aggressive Guy scoffed in the background.

Red Hair glanced at the old guy, her silent question acknowledged with a slow nod from him. At the confirmation, she carefully leaned down next to Zach's head and whispered something into his ear. A quieter wheeze was what she got, but she seemed to understand it as she wrote something down onto the clipboard.

‘Oh… oh this is not good.’

‘I think you'll need to specify exactly what fucked up situation you're talking about here big guy.’

The whispered questions and scribbling from Red Hair were immediately turned into background noise as Tang heard the first word from them. Good thing his face was locked towards the stone floor or else he would've probably been jumped for the pure exasperation stuck on his face.

‘What do you think? We're already in some deep trouble for letting that monster make contact with this supposed “waste of time” like you said.’

Tang rubs his eyes under the glasses, content in letting the voices run their course like usual. But still. The buzz of the voices, cries from patients, and the scribbling on that clipboard were all overlapping and starting to become too much for him and his head.

Or at least, that's what he assumed when his hearing started to shorten in and out and when his surroundings started to blur into monochrome blobs. He sighed internally as he continued to rub his eyes, hoping it would anchor his mind.

Blinking once again, he looks ahead at the foot of the bed. Everything has come back into focus now, but it seemed like the colors around them had been dulled, almost into grayscale. His eyes shoot open at the sight. This was all too familiar.

The room had turned almost eerily silent; it was especially noticeable with the background noise vanishing along with the scribbling. Everyone around him seemed stuck in slow motion, like Red Hair’s ponytail staying frayed out from a previous swish of her head and some staff running outside that were stuck mid-air through the crack in the curtains.

However, this was also different as there was still one thing he could hear properly. The two voices were still arguing at the same intensity, but now they didn't seem like they were stuck in his head. No, they echoed over the layout, and he could guess where they were as wisps of orange light swayed at the edge of his vision, painfully obvious now that world turned monochrome.

Tang didn't want to look up. He didn't want to see what was lingering in front of him. Do they see me? Do they even notice what's happening? What if they discover I can hear them!? They already seem pretty peeved at each other. Maybe they're too invested in the argument to see anything else. Maybe they wouldn't notice if I took a quick look?...

He was heavily tempted by the idea. Finally being able to see the two voices who were lingering near him since the beginning of his power surges? Now that might finally give him some answers on who these guys were and what they're doing in his head.

Cian itself could only really yank his bracelet really hard physically while keeping most apparent secrets to itself, and he would rather risk just a glance at the two voices for potential information than continue under the pressure of the medical tent for how much longer.

Gaining the courage, Tang steeled himself and slowly lifted his eyes off the floor. He wasn't sure what he was expecting, but it definitely wasn't what he saw.

Both voices were seemingly floating in front of Tang, still fighting animatedly floating above the bed while thankfully not paying attention to Tang himself. Their figures seemed very similar to Cian’s, translucent orange skin and white eyes matching its appearance to a tee. There were some stark differences, though.

The one on the left had relatively simple clothing, loose pants and a matching traditional button down shirt with straw sandals as its choice of dress along with medium length messy hair. It seemed to have cracks along its skin like porcelain, almost as if its body had been dropped too hard onto a hard surface. It also raised its voice louder than the other with clear aggression on its face even without irises or pupils.

The one on the right had more elaborate yet messy clothing, with a tattered embroidered robe, ripped silk pants, and dirty cloth black boots along with longer, thinner hair waving behind it freely along with its long beard. It gave a gaze of contempt towards the other, while interjecting snide remarks with its shrill voice.

Tang didn't know how to react other than staring blankly at the two. This is what they looked like all this time? He didn't imagine them to look so… human. Cian had an almost ethereal and familiar atmosphere to it, wavy hair and loose untouched clothing to match the flowey speech it used.

In contrast, these two seemed to have come drunk from some type of costume party. They didn't even seem all that familiar other than the recognition from their voices, the faces unfamiliar to Tang before this moment

Now he really wanted his sketchbook. He wanted to draw them and jot down notes and theories of what they could be and why they're in his head.

He didn't even realize one of the voices had gone silent as he focussed on the other subconsciously and tried to engrave all of these details into his head, occasionally clocking back into the argument they were still having to see if they would give any less vague answers.

“... and now we're stuck HERE. Literally the worst place someone like him could be in when we're trying to- UGH. Nothing even matters anymore! We already failed, do we still need to be stationed here when he can't even connect with us now due to that prick’s influence?” The one on the left was still speaking, seemingly not stopping anytime soon.

“It’s like they're punishing us specifically for not anticipating the break. And we're not even- hey. Hey, why are you ignoring me?! I have some issues I need to vent out right now, and if you're going to give me that stupid self-righteous silent treatment again-”

Then it suddenly fell silent; the absence of the noise made the ringing in Tang’s ears more prominent. Its body immediately tensed when it noticed something to its side. Tang found out why as he focussed back into the full picture.

The one on the right had turned its head, fully making eye contact with Tang with an expression of shock and slight fear frozen on its face. Its colorless eyes bored into him as the other slowly turned its head to do the same.

They became entirely still, almost as if the monochrome world around finally took effect.

Now, Tang had caught their undivided attention.

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YES! Someone else finally says it!

I’m tired of some people spitting shit about the Adam v. Alastor fight

Yes, Alastor got cocky and had his ass handed to him.

HOWEVER: WE REALIZE HE TOOK AN ANGELIC WEAPON TO THE CHEST AND SURVIVED????

Demons die to Vaggie’s SPEAR, simply because of the nature of the weapon. We see angels and demons dying throughout episode 8 to these badass weapons.

And Alastor TOOK it. He got nailed directly in the chest, and yeah, suffered at very least a punctured lung or something (he was bleeding a LOT), and while he couldn’t physically get up, he got away.

Like, I’m sorry he wasn’t perfect in that battle??? It was super satisfying at first to see him go to town on Adam, but after the fuck up, he LIVED. He got AWAY.

I don’t know a single demon else that was hit by the axe that episode that lived. Alastor is not infallible, yes, I know this, but Jesus Christ y’all, give him credit for probably being the first demon EVER to survive that.

WHOO! Good to see you back! I also just got into watching the anime, and I am SO excited to see what you do with this! So many possibilities! I love this so much!

NEW AU!!

A World Without Him

Chapter 10

Oh my goodness, what was I thinking?!

Tang had gotten over his shock when he finally walked far enough to actually think about what just happened. But in his haste, he had already walked a couple of blocks when he had been lost in the moment.

Now, though, he's stopped at that bakery with the make-it-yourself type deal that he remembered opening a couple of days ago. The only reason he could recognize it was because he was currently pacing past its window.

He had been freaking out ever since he got over his grogginess from the previous haze. He hasn't been out since last night, he doesn't have any supplies with him (including his dead phone left on the bedside table) other than a nearly empty backpack, and now he's walking aimlessly towards something he doesn't even know exists or not because of a random dream!

I should just go home. I dont know what to look for or what I'm doing. Tang thought, stopping his continuous pacing.

Now he was right in front of the store window, seeing his tired reflection looking right back at him with the sun highlighting his face from behind. He could only sigh before sitting on one of the outside tables in front of said window. Then he took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes, releasing the tension from between them. The colors around blended together as his vision distorted and stretched.

It was only after he opened and refocussed his eyes agin, that he noticed the deathly silence around him. His surroundings now seemed blurry without his glasses, but he could still feel the lifelessness his surroundings now held.

The street looked dark and colorless, almost as if the color had been faded out of a photograph. The blurry shapes around him never moved, never made a sound. The only thing in his ears was his heartbeat, which steadily kept rising against his will.

He hastily grabbed his glasses, his eyes widening when the surroundings seemed to warp with his vision.

The street was now in full gray-scale, with the shadows being pitch black against the light gray buildings. Everything seemed frozen in time, with the people around him gaining soft, colorful outlines while frozen in place.

Tang didn't know what was going on, and didn't want to know what was going on. Maybe he finally snapped. Maybe he's full on hallucinating now. All he could think about now was getting back home.

So he violently stood up from the table and started to speed walk back home. The still, almost completely colorless figures of the civillians unnerved him to no end.

From closer inspection, they seemed to be in slow motion; it was just enough to where they seems like statues at a first glance. Tang didn't notice this until he saw one guy's drink slowly spread onto the sidewalk from a supposedly clumsy passerby.

I'm going insane.

He side-stepped another civillian on the street with their bright purple hue overpowering the soft sky blue of the person beside them. He tried not to pay too much attention to these strange details.

The one time I try to find some answers about my recent episodes and now I'm back into a worse version of one!

With an irritated grunt, Tang kicks a stray can on the street, now a block away from the start of this limbo type place. The can only went up about a foot before slowing down to the speed of its surroundings.

A small breeze pucks up through his street, not affected by the slowing time. Yet he didn't acknowledge the change, only focused on putting one foot in front of the other.

Why am I so unlucky to have this happen right after yesterday?

He yet again speeds up his pace, now almost a complete sprint past all the still moments around him. He needs to get home. He needs to be sane to actually know what's going on.

Is any of this even happening? I'm an idiot: of course this isn't real. I'm just having another episode, after another horrible dream, after another person died in my arms-

...Why can't I just get over it already. I can't change anything.

The breeze picked up suddenly, whipping past Tang's grimaced face. The intense force of the wind didn't seem to affect him, though, as it swerved around him and through his hair.

Wisps of messy hair flowed in front of his face as he continued on his way home.

Why do I always let something like this happen? When can this finally just stop? I can't keep helplessly watching from the sidelines as people like Allan risk their lives for cowards like me.

He could feel wet tears roll down his face. They dropped to the still ground in waves as he continued to walk. He couldn't waste any more time in this nightmare world unless he wanted his brain to snap.

He walked past many construction sites over the next couple of blocks. He didn't remember walking this far out, but he didn't want to think about the connotations of what that could mean.

He could see the foundations crushed to bits from the empty sidewalk; the concrete walls and floor were all cracked or completely torn through by what Tang could only assume was one of Mk's many battles.

His thoughts carried on to the library, with the sunken roof and the crumblibg walls, but he quickly shut down whatever he was about to think next. Mk was always reckless; it's just who he is. A bad feeling always seemed to overwhelm his stomach when he thought about Mk after yesterday.

Oh please, it's not like you would be any better in his position.

The wind kicks up again, slightly pushing him forward.

Do you think you're any different from the demons he fights every day? How you've probably done worse things than what those bastards could ever dream of?

The tears continue down his face as he walks by the many windows of the street. The shop fronts seem just as lifeless as the rest of the street. He stares as his feet when he walks, avoiding looking at the shops while creating a trail behind him as the waterworks don't seem to stop.

Harina would've left you there to die if she knew what you would become.

Tang's breathes were heavy as he slowed down his steps, almost stopping entirely in front of a stores window. He noticed it had sunflower motifs as he raised his head up to look in the window.

He could only see himself looking back. His hair messy and unkempt, his body highlited in a soft orange glow, his eyes puffy from sobbing all the way here, and his suddenly pale face as he noticed the figure standing beside him.

A tall, young woman stood behind him, staring into his eyes over his shoulder. Her eyes were hollow and blood dripped slowly from her mouth and he long black hair swayed with the breeze.

You were, and still are a pathetic, worthless piece of shit that doesn't even try to live on in her memory as you just lounge over their hundreds of sacrifices-

"JUST LEAVE, ME, ALONE." Tang had shouted, grabbing his own head and crouching down onto the ground. The wind howled in his ears and started to harshly whip the street, shattering every window as far as the eye could see.

Glass rained down over him and the street as he looked up, not caring if he was struck with the shimmering downpour. The glass slowly fell onto the surrounding area, and eventually slowing to a stop like the rest of this hellish place.

He could only stare at the moment frozen in time. The reflections in them proved irksome as they seemed to drown in the orange glow from behind him.

He was yet again tired of this place. How many times does he have to go through this? Enough to please whatever God he had pissed off probably. He laughed bitterly to himself.

He didn't turn around. He closed his eyes. He didn't want to give whatever those monsters wanted out of him; he just wanted to go home.

So only when the whispers from behind finally faded, and the piercing eyes slowly disappeared, was when Tang opened his eyes again.

Now everything was truly quiet. No buzzing, no whispers in the back of his mind, just silence.

He slowly tilted his head up from his perch on the sidewalk, taking everything in slowly. A tall building was in front of him. He could already feel how it was steril, blank, and full of mixed emotions.

The doors in front of him show many different signs, but one caught his eyes immeadietly, "Metrapolis Springs Hospital: First Responder volunteers needed!"

The golden lettering was all it took for his eyes to widen from the initial numbness. Those letters important, he knew. It's just that he didn't know why.

And he would never find out at this moment, as looking too hard at the building caused his vision to blur once again, causing him to lean on a nearby electrical pole for balance.

It getting hard to keep his eyes open as his eyelids became heavy and the whispers started up again. However, there was only one this time. It talked smoothly through his head as his conscious slipped away from his grasp, leaving him up against the pole.

When he woke up again, the world suddenly gained more colors than before, causing Tang's eyes to hurt from the brightness. When he refocussed again, he could tell that the sky had darkened and the sun was about to set.

Where am I?...

He slowly looked around in his grogginess, coming to realize he was right outside of his apartment. He had been sat down on the outside electrical pole with all the posters. He could even see the one for the Metrapolis Library still up with some new tears...

He needed to go back home. Getting inside where it was safe was his top priority. He grabbed the side of the splintered pole to pull himself up and steady his unstable stance, letting him stand up after some struggle.

His mind knew he needed to do something today, something that was important enough to make him feel uneasy, yet his body didn't cooperate as it lead him through the double doors of his apartment building.

The golden letters repeated over and over in his mind as he walked up the steps. They were ingrained into his brain as he reached his final floor.

And then, yet again, Tang could only open the door and slam it behind him as he slid down on the other side. He put his head between his knees as he closed his eyes once again.

I can't keep living like this: these, these horrible trances everyday just kept getting worse and worse as I continue to stay here. I need to leave. I just need to... get away from it all...

And finally, he could only succumb to sleep at the end of it all. His body went limp, and he passed out even before his body hit the floor.

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I love his wavy hair and freckles!! Looks great!

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REBLOGS APPRECIATED!!!

IF YOU TAG AS SHIP I WILL BLOCK YOU