Sometimes I Catch Myself Thinkin What My Parents Would Say If They Saw My “liked” On Tumbler. I Feel

this kinda tmi but i want a good 20 y/o katsuki who’s just absolutely shredded n so much bigger than me to fuck the living shit out of me

Kiss Me Slowly — Pt. 2

bakugou x shy!fem!reader

masterlist

pt.2/3, pt. 1

wc: 1.5k

cw: cursing, fluff, making out, slight suggestive themes bakugou is sneaky, all characters are aged up

You and bakugou have only been dating for two months and as soon as he told his parents he had a girlfriend they flipped. So in order to get aquatinted with them the happy couple gets invited to a weekend getaway in the mountains.

Katsuki backtracks a bit to the stairs taking your bags with you and begins to climb them all the way up to his childhood room. Opening the door to his teenage mind, you wander a bit touching everything in sight as he just eyes you in wonder. Katsuki comes up behind you and turns you around slowly to face him.

“That wasn’t as scary as I thought it would be,” You bounce on your feet adrenaline still pumping through your nerves.

Katsuki doesn’t say anything and just stands there swaying you while you look into his vermilion eyes. Pulling away and heading towards your luggage you begin to unpack the things you will need for tonight and the next morning. Even though you had gotten the hard part over with there was still the burning nervousness of sharing a room with him. Something you still haven’t done. Being adults, you would think there would be a sleepover at least everyone in a while, but every time it got late, he or you would just make your way to your own home.

Katsuki felt like a middle schooler with a girl in his room for the first time, keeping his eyes on your figure just wondering how he got so lucky. That is until you break the silence once more huffing at the bag before speaking.

“Sukiiiiiii,” so draw out his name to try to sound annoyed. He walks up beside you and looks down at the bag. He knows what you’re wondering, but hey it was his mom's orders. Were you suggesting he go against his old hags wishes? A sly smirk on his face as he hums in response.

“I didn’t pack this, i don’t even own this, so why’s it in the bag?” Looking up at him holding the tiny lilac bathing suit, you give an irked expression as he laughs at you.

“I told you hag told us to pack for anything. You,” he takes a moment to poke your forehead “didn’t have a bathing suit, so I helped you out a bit,” his smirk only growing wider as you get more embarrassed.

“Well seeing as it’s winter and we are going to the mountains, I didn’t think there would be a need for… this,” It was a very pretty swimsuit just not something you have ever worn before, especially not in front of the blonde.

“Well pretty, I was just making sure you were well prepared,” he says matter-of-factly before taking a step closer to you.

A blush erupts on your face as you look back down at the article of clothing, “It is... cute.” You eventually respond. He leans down to pull you into a breath-taking kiss, molding his lips against yours just perfectly. Putting his hand on the small of your back to push you chest to chest, deepening the kiss even more. You slide one of your hands up to rest on his heart, while the other goes to toy with the hairs at the nape of his neck. Katsuki pulls at your bottom lip with his teeth, in a silent plea for you to open your mouth a bit to which you comply.

He slips his tongue in making you pull at his hair a bit, forcing him to groan, as slow hands begin to wander, down your sides, against your waist, about to rest on your-

“Katsuki, your mother would like you to come set the table for dinner.” Masaru says as he knocks on the door signaling his presence. Katsuki reluctantly pulls away muttering a reply to his father, all while still staring into your beautiful e/c eyes. He gives you one last kiss before he takes your hand to lead you back downstairs.

You follow him blindly, still overly flustered by what had just happened. He had never kissed you so passionately before it felt like, Fireworks. Only making you swoon for the tall man even more, making you want to kick your feet at every bit of affection he gives you. You let out a girlish giggle, only being able to contain your excitement for so long, what’s a girl to do? Katsuki stops mid-way to look back at you, confusion written all over his face. Realizing you’d been caught; your laugh slowly dies down and you just look at him shyly. Here you are, only about halfway down the stairs, just awkwardly looking at each other, until he speaks.

“What’re you giggling about back there?” There's a bit of a knowing glint in his eye as he presses on for an answer.

“I-I've just never... y’know... like that before.” You whisper as you break his gaze, before you continue, “I really liked it, suki.” You laugh a bit again, and it’s like he’s never seen anything more beautiful in his entire life. Katsuki brings his hand up to your hair and ruffles it a bit. He turns around and starts to head down to the kitchen once more, you close behind. Once the two of you had gotten the table ready, you obviously helping despite him sternly telling you no, you all sit to eat.

At first, it’s a tad awkward, you shift slightly in your chair, as you twiddle with your fingers. But when Katsuki senses that you’re uncomfortable under his parent’s gaze, he takes your hand, and everything feels okay again. Mitsuki is the first to speak, interested in how the two of you got together, “So, how did you meet?” She looks up from her plate at you expectantly awaiting your answer.

“Well,” you let out a breathy laugh trying to calm your nerves, “I was at a café, and this creepy guy just wouldn’t leave me alone, even when I tried my best to show disinterest. He moved over to the seat next to me and I tried to move away but ended up falling off my chair, except I didn’t hit the floor because Katsuki was there to catch me. He must’ve seen what was about to happen, hero’s intuition, I guess. Then of course he yelled at the man.”

“And here I thought you were incapable of love, I guess when my boy sees a damsel in distress, he just can't help himself can he.” His mother says.

“Tch, she could’ve handled the guy, the brat just acts shy in front of everyone, really just a pain in my ass.” He says jokingly, smirking at your mouth agape.

“Suki, that’s mean!” You pout at him, mumbling something under your breath as his parents' chuckle.

They go into their own side conversation, reminiscing over how they met, when Katsuki moves his hand to your leg and gives a loving squeeze, before leaning to whisper in your ear, “You know I'm just playn’ with ya right, princess?”

“Hmph. I can let it slide this one time I suppose.” He laughs at your statement before continuing to eat his dinner.

The rest of the meal went smoothly and before you knew it, it was time to reside back to Katsuki’s room for bed.

“Remember we’d ought to wake up early so we can be there by noon so rest up kiddos. G’night!” Masaru says on the way to their room.

“Night.” Katsuki responds in a gruff voice, closing his door and sauntering over to you.

“C’mon pretty, let’s get changed for bed.” Giving you a swift kiss on the cheek, he goes to pull off his shirt, getting it about halfway off before you stop him.

“Wait wait wait!” You turn around fast, covering your eyes, and lowering your head.

He continues to undress his top half without you knowing, then making his way over to you. Katsuki puts his hand on your shoulder and speaks, “What’s wrong pretty? I always sleep like this, want me to leave it on?”

“I just... wasn’t expecting it that’s all.” You say, your back still to him.

“So then why dontcha turn around y/n?” He spins you around to face him, but to his surprise you still have your face covered and head down.

Once you finally look up at him, your eyes widen at the sight. He looked like he was chiseled by the gods, muscles so defined it was insane.

“You’re drooling, princess.” Katsuki says in a teasing tone, hand coming up to close your mouth.

“Suki I was not, n-now turn around so I can change.” You say with a pouty voice. He does as you say and waits for you to give him the okay. Not once did he look back even trying to peek. Once you tap him on the shoulder, signifying he can turn back, Katsuki whirls around to pick you up and throw you onto the bed.

He gets comfortable, putting his arm around you, snuggling you close, then whispering in your ear, “Sleep tight pretty, we got a long weekend ahead of us.” The last thing you feel before dozing off is the soft kiss Katsuki leaves on your neck, wishing you one final goodnight.

“am i doin’ it right?”

you can barely hear him through the thick haze of clouds surrounding your head, nestled so comfortably in the pillows underneath you as he angles your lower body further into his lap. your head tips back with a groan at the new angle, tears forming at your waterline from how good it felt.

“does it hurt? d’you want me to stop?”

you all but shake your head vigorously, lips parted in a sharp gasp that has your chest shuddering. the flimsy top you had on is bunched up just over your chest, shorts and panties flung to only god knows where.

“don’t stop—please, don’t stop, g-od,” the last syllable is punted out of you with a whine tapering off at the end, back bowing off the bed. even still, you try your best to continue to guide him. “there—there. ki, y-your fingers. curl ‘em upwards, please, please—”

brows furrowed and lips bitten red at the sight of your below him, he does as told and curls his fingers up, narrowed eyes bouncing back and forth between your near starry eyed expression and the way your core squeezed around his fingers in response.

“fuck.” both your voices release the same word in tandem, your warbled cry nearly drowning out his involuntary hiss.

“gonna—gonna cum. shit,” your eyes widen slightly, a hand shooting out to grab his wrist. his thumb swipes again your clit and your body seizes, legs tightening around his waist with every thrust. “ka—katsuki, wait, i’m gonna—”

“wanna see you cum on m’fingers.” slick sticks to your inner thighs and his fingers as he bullies your most sensitive part open, teeth sinking into his lower lip the more you tremble. “gonna look so pretty when y’cum.”

“y’think… y’think im pretty?” you look up at him like he hung the moon and its fucking stars in the sky, wide eyed and full of adoration, and his head spins.

“the prettiest fuckin’ girl i’ve ever laid my eyes on.” a wheezed sound rumbles from his chest when you tighten around his fingers at that. “and now you’re all mine. this pussy’s all mine. is that right?”

“s’all y-yours, ki. all—all yours—!” hips jerking up, your voice just about gives out, tears beginning to pool and stream down your cheeks. “feels—feels funny, ki… f-feels weird, oh—”

“cum f’me, pretty.”

the intensity of his words is what drives you over the edge, legs squeezing around his middle as his fingers pump once, twice, and a final time, squirting all over his lower half and staining the sheets below him. your head is knocked back in a silent scream, eyes squeezed shut as more tears streamed down your face.

this part he didn’t have to learn. he coaxes you through the aftershocks with gentle rubs to your inner thighs, kissing your both your knees before moving down to your legs. a shudder runs down your back when he gets a little too close, and you struggle to push yourself back up on your forearms.

he looks smug despite his worn out expression. “did i pass?”

you laugh, exhausted, and manage to nod. “you… you definitely did something, um.” nodding to his shirt and sweats, you wince slightly. “sorry ‘bout that.”

he only shrugs, nosing against your thigh, and smiles against your skin when your try to suppress another shudder. “you can make it up to me by teaching me other things.”

“ki? what do you mean by other…. no.” your arm moves to push his head away from where it aches still, shaking slightly from the effort. “can’t cum again. give me a few minutes, i’ll be—ki!”

a soft whine tumbles from your lips when he nips your inner thigh, arms finally giving out from holding yourself up for too long. the only thing you see before succumbing to pleasure once more is another smug grin, crimson hues glinting mischievously.

“what? i’ve always been taught to clean up my messes.”

... give me the soft bakugo 👀

If this flops or gets me ostracized from the fandom you’re uninvited to my birthday party-

-

Bakugo could never stay awake during movies.

It was a problem for him, genuinely. The amount of times he’s fallen asleep, and grumbles in annoyance when you tell him the movie’s over is truly staggering. It’s not that he wants to miss the action, he’s just so exhausted from being… well. Bakugo, that when the end of the day comes, and you’ve got a hand buried in his hair and a blanket tossed over you both, he never stands a chance.

And it’s a ritual at this point, merely part of your daily routine. He comes home. He showers. He curls up against you, and before the movie’s rising action can start, he’s out cold.

And nine times out of ten, you’re more than willing to stay, scratching his scalp and watching Bakugo’s handsome face twitch and lax with each detail of dreams…

But today? The one out of ten? You’re fucking hungry.

You so wish you’d eaten before you decided to be his snuggle buddy for the next few hours, knowing he’d already had a bad enough day and you leaving to have a snack would only disturb him further, but if it wasn’t you slowly leaving the warmth of bed, it would be your growling stomach.

Okay. Slowly now. You pinch the arm that’s tossed over your waist and slowly lift it up, slipping from under the appendage and out to freedom.

Once out of his warm embrace, you quickly scurry to the kitchen for a sandwich- heavy enough to get through the night, but light enough where you can quickly eat it- and a quick look through of your phone so you can update your friends and family to be officially his for the night.

And it seems to all go well! He’s still knocked out, as you assumed he would be after such a long day, and you’re just about ready to bite when-

“…the hell in the fuck are you doing?”

The voice makes your eyes wander from the brightness of your phone screen, to the culprit himself, standing in the hallway with sweats low on his hips and a blanket wrapped around just the top half of his torso. He knuckles his tired eyes, his lips in a sleepy scowl, and god he looks so snuggly you want to bring him straight back to his warm bed and let him sleep off the day.

But your rumbling stomach would never allow that.

Stopping your staring, your teeth hover over the sandwich before coming down to a biteless close, and you look at him with a clear of your throat, “I’m… eating?”

“You left the bed.”

“Yeah, because you don’t like crumbs-“

“You left me in the bed.”

You blink at him in complete confusion, trying your hardest not to laugh in his face as he growls deep in his throat, “you left me alone in the bed, to make yourself a sandwich!”

“Well I sure as hell wasn’t going to wake you up,” you snort, watching as he struggles back a yawn to continue his ‘threatening’ look. “You were tired babe, I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“Well… well I didn’t like not knowing where you were,” he grumbles. “And when I pat the damned bed and it was empty, that was an even worse way to wake up.”

All an elaborate way of saying ‘I didn’t like that you left me and our cuddle time.’ You could’ve sworn he’d only be mad if you’d woken him up in the process of leaving, but that’s very clearly not the case. When a loving grin spreads over your face, you know he knows he’s been figured out, and he crosses his blanket-covered arms and avoids your gaze. “Awww, Katsuki-“

“Don’t even.”

“Did you want me to-“

“Fuck off.”

“Stay and snuggle?” His words of empty threats do nothing to deter you from finishing your sweet coo, which he scoffs at while you slowly pull out the chair next to you for him to sit in. “Baby, you know I’d never leave if I knew it would make you upset!”

“It didn’t make me up-fucking-set,” he growls, but he does let his long legs carry him to the chair next to you, plopping down sleepily while maroon eyes struggle to stay awake. “It’s the principle of the matter- you leave, you fuckin’ tell me where you’re going. End of discussion.”

You snort and shake your head at his words, finally taking a bite of your sandwich and thus, ending the conversation. Despite his efforts, he doesn’t look half as mad as he thinks he does, lips pouty and cheeks a titch flushed from your affectionate words and the last remnants of sleep being pulled from his soul.

“For what it’s worth,” you hum, slowly tugging his chair closer to yours, which he instantly rests his head on your shoulder when he’s close enough. “I always want to cuddle with you, too, stinky.”

“Quit it with your stupid pet names,” he grumbles. “I am a man, and I find it disgusting the way you are able to make my heart race.”

“Of course you do,” you agree with him to relax his protests, turning your head to kiss the fluffs of hair that adorn the crown of his head. “Let me finish eating, then we can go nap for real.”

He grunts, a pouting language for ‘fine,’ before he lets you eat in slight peace, just without the use of your right arm which is now being held hostage by his own two limbs.

“C’ I have a bite?” He mumbles, opening his mouth expectantly, as if already knowing you’d say yes. You chuckle and bring the sandwich to his lips, which he bites softly and chews slowly. “‘fank you.”

“You’re welcome, my love.”

“Gross.”

Just Friends

EEEEK!! also not edited 🤣🙌🏼

bakugou x reader college au

wc: 660

masterlist

You are friends, best friends; And he is your world, however even though you are madly in love with him, you don’t think it’s reciprocated. But little do you know he’s pining for you too. The lingering touches, jokes during class. He’s pulling out all his best work just for one single chance to make you his.

Todays lecture was a particularly boring one. Katsuki thought so too, you could tell by the way he would lean over and whisper something into your ear, trying desperately to make you laugh. That laugh that he loves so much. Anytime the professor said something, anything at all, there he was cracking a joke. At some point during the class you just stopped listening all together to solely focus on Bakugou.

“Ya wanna get lunch after this? ‘M starving.” He says quietly to not disrupt the people around him.

“Lunch sounds sooooo good, I haven’t eaten yet today I don’t think.” You whisper back trying to wrack your brain to see if you’d eaten.

“Tch gotta take care of y’self, stupid. You’d be so fucking dead without me I swear” He laughs at the incredulous look you give him and only tears his eyes away when he hears everyone moving.

You began to pack your things and made your way into the isle to wait for Bakugou. He always takes his sweet time cleaning up because of his strict “organization” system. Yet you always wait. Not because you can’t make it to the door by yourself, but because you feel safe in his presence.

He’d made his way to you and you start the head down the stairs of the auditorium-like classroom. “Oh my god, walk slower” He says sarcastically once you’d made it to the doors. Always being the last people out because he takes so long gives you the opportunity to mess with him a little more.

So you stopped. Directly in front of him in the doorway. But what you forgot was he’s so much bigger and stronger than you, so before you could even laugh about it, you’re off the ground. Thrown over his shoulder like a sack of potato’s.

“Ah! Katsuki! Put me down put me down put me down!” You squeak out.

“Nope, this is what you get for being mean.” He laughs at his own statement. You? Mean? Never. And especially never to him.

“I surrender! I’m sorry, please put me down katsu!” You say giggling trying to fake an apologetic look even though he can’t see your face.

He grabs you by the hips and gently let you down right in front of him. And he truly honest to god didn’t mean for the two of you to be so close but hey, he wasn’t complaining. His hands never left your waist because he feels like if he moves it’s all over, never to happen again. And it’s so much harder to compose himself when you’re looking at him like that with those beautiful eyes of yours.

“Katsu…” You whisper out gaining his attention. “Yeah?” He says with the softest voice you’ve ever heard. All the while, whilst the two of you are barely speaking, your faces are inching towards each other. Constantly darting your eyes down to the others lips.

“Y/N can i-” You cut bakugou off before he can finish. “Please.” The last word exchanged before he leans down to capture your lips in his. And boy did it feel like heaven, like the stars finally aligned. Lips slotting together in harmony, breathy noises coming out in almost moans, teeth clanking together at some points because you’re both so happy you can’t help but smile. It continues for a bit until you remember you’re out in the open and you move to pull away. His head follows yours in a last minute attempt to kiss you again before he opens his eyes to see your dazed smile.

Yeah, maybe you weren’t “just friends”.

TAGS 🏷:

@trafalgar-lau @mybabekatsuki

my joints hurt

૮ ͈>◡< ͈ა warnings — smut, nsfw, minors do not interact. pussy jobs, fem!reader, bakugou is kinda mean but also a soft dom. enjoy <3

i’m completely normal about giving katsuki a pussy job expecting him the one to become a mess, when in reality, you end up being the mess.

like, katsuki would be laying on his back against your crushed white sheets— sunlight filtering in on a warm afternoon and illuminating the careful slope of his features as if he was carved from marble by the gods. his hands, rough from his quirk, would be smoothing over the stretch marks on your ass, maybe squeezing the flesh every once in a while as you straddle his hips— soaked pussy lips enveloping his rock hard cock while you rut back and forth against him.

he’s drawing supportive little patterns into the small of your back, smirking up at you every time his cock twitches and his seedy cockhead bumps your clit— ‘cause you let out a needy little gasp and screw your eyes shut and scrunch up your nose so adorably, it makes him lose his shit at how cute you are when you use bakugou to get yourself off.

“you gonna put it in yet, baby?” he’s mocking you, smirking slow and sexy while his voice carries a prevalent and gravelly rasp that comes with waking up to katsuki bakugou in the morning. at his question, you shake your head— pouting in frustration as you rock your hips back and forth, harder, over his erection. “no?” bakugou hisses through gritted teeth, watching you grind your pussy down on him needily. “c’mon princess, yanno you need it.”

it’s annoying how fucking good he looks lying beneath you, an arm behind his head while his golden skin is highlighted by the morning light, blonde locks mussed with the movement of his sleeping patterns. his eyes hold mischief, lust and love between the brownish flecks hidden amongst a sea of vermillion red and his brown nipples stand at attention. katsuki’s cock finds itself in a similar state, bricked up and fat between your soaked folds, blue-purple veins prominent while they pulse with hormone laden lust, while his tip bleeds a milky white, painfully red.

“s-shut up, katsuki,” you whine, nails digging into your boyfriend’s pecs that you use to steady yourself. your entire body jolts when he ruts up into you, dragging his cock along the entire length of your slit, gyrating his cockhead into your puffy clit. “this s’supposed to be my fun.”

“yeah? don’t look like yer havin’ much fun.” katsuki hums, hooded eyes drifting up and down your body— taking in the way you shake, the way your lips part in adorable moans and he removes the hand at your waist to smack down on your ass hard…before the one behind his head comes down to help guide your hips and pussy over his girth. “you’re not gonna cum from this,”

you hate that he’s right, that you’ve been with him so long you can barely get off without him— you need the familiar burn of his dick stretching you out, crave the feeling of being so full of katsuki to the point where he overwhelms your senses. “i-i can!” you can’t. you should hate that he’s trained your body to desire him and only him— but that’s what makes fucking your boyfriend so much better.

“mmm fuck. look at that cute little pussy twitchin’ for me,” he says, almost breathless as he looks between your sticky thighs, groaning at the sight of your arousal clinging to his length in thick clear strings as he pulls you up from his lap, tip bumping at your entrance as if he’s going to fuck up into you. “you won’t, not gonna cum without my cock deep inside, i know you baby. ain’t doin’ yourself any good lyin’ to me.”

he doesn’t stop teasing you there, squeezing at your soft hips, drawing shapes against your tummy until his thumb is able to reach your clit— rubbing it in wide circles. “you won’t cum, but i will, gonna leave all my cream on your cute cunt.” bakugou let’s put a deep moan from right in his chest, the sound vibrating through you and sending a shooting pleasure right down to your clit. “might even leave ya high ‘n dry.”

“you won’t,” you hiccup in protest, relenting, letting katsuki’s mushroomed cockhead prod at your little hole with each slow grind and thrust against your sticky, raw mound. “stop bein’ mean.”

both of you share a sweet and shaky moan when katsuki finally pushes into you all the way, cock slipping past your glistening entrance with ease. “you’re right, always gotta make my baby cum,” wrapping his muscled arms around your waist— the blonde keeps you anchored down on his lap, wasting no time in setting a rough, hungry pace to his thrusts into your cunt as if he can no longer fold back, as if you putting your pussy on him had been torturing him for hours. “‘m never mean t’you, just know what you fuckin’ need. know how to take care of my baby— that’s right, choke my fuckin’ cock just like that.” he growls over the lewd squelching that now fills the room, just as he fills your guts.

it’s only then that you allow yourself to slump forward into bakugou’s chest— let him grab two handfuls of your ass to spread you open on his dick, let him in deeper until you practically can feel him in your throat as well.

and he’s right, you don’t know why you ever thought you could ever cum without katsuki’s thick, chubbed up cock pounding into you like his life depends on it.

I love making the first move and then it going over their heads😀

Bakugou would literally go through every single piece of chicken on the show Hot Ones, he’ll eat the chicken wings like it’s nothing. I mean no shit, he fucks with spicy shit, “Tch, I bet Deku can’t even go through at least three of these.” He smirked to himself as he ripped the chicken off the bone with his teeth, to be honest though, he does cough a bit when they get deeper into the spice levels. He does sniffle as well but when does he give a fuck? “Recently, you came out to the public about finding the love of your life. Is she a Pro Hero like you?” Bakugou smiled softly to himself as he licked his fingers and wiped his mouth with a napkin, you and him had been dating for a few months, but it feels like you been together for 3 years. Recently you and him came out to the public that you and him were dating and the whole media went bananas, “Nah, she isn’t a pro hero, but she does have a helpful quirk I would say. She does her own thing which I’m proud of and she’s proud of me, I do feel like shit when I have cancel out shit we planned, due to my schedule but she understands more than I should and that’s why I love her so much.” Bakugou continued to eat through the chicken wings with a breeze, after it ended he got ready to go back home. The video was uploaded while Katsuki was on his way back home, he knew already that you were watching it. “Baby! I’m back.” He shouted through the house, he didn’t get a response back. “Babe?” He scoffed before walking upstairs to your shared bedroom, “Baby you in here- he saw you on the bed with small tears in your eyes, ready to fall any minute. He panicked. “Shit,babe what the fuck happened?” He cupped your face as he wiped your tears away, you sniffled before smiling, he gave you a confused look before looking down at your iPad soon realizing. “D-did you mean every word you said?” You said through a hiccup making Bakugou sigh before chucking, “Of course I did dummy, I would literally go down a pile of shit if I didn’t mean every word.” You pulled him down by his neck to kiss him softly, you pecked his face multiple times. “You know, you could be a softie even if you don’t think you are.” You ran your fingers through his locks, he rolled his eyes playfully before flicking your forehead. “Shaddup and cuddle me.” “So needy.”

MasterList

Tag-List: @ebiharachan @otomefan

reblogging even though i have been so fortunate to never have been exposed to being mistreated so horribly and everyday i am thankful for that but just because i haven’t doesn’t mean that 1 in 6 women aren’t. The fact that men think they are so entitled to our bodies is absolutely disgusting. If you are a man reading now, remember this. you are owed NOTHING, you are not entitled to ANYTHING. you can’t make us feel bad for not putting out for you. And if we don’t give you what you want you call us sluts and whores??? in what world does that make any sense? And to ANYONE that has ever laid a finger on someone without their consent, hells got a special place for you.

trigger warning: rape

When I was 13 years old and curious about sex and love, I asked my mom if she had had sex before marrying my father (of whom she is still married to, and has been since before I was born). She said that that wasn’t really a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ question. I said ‘sure it is, you’ve either had sex before him, or you haven’t’. She brought me onto the couch and sat me down and told me about the boy she liked when she was young and how one night she snuck into his house while his parents were gone and they were kissing and he said they should have sex and she said that she wanted to save sex for marriage and he laughed and basically took all her clothes off and he raped her and as my mom was telling the story she cried and this was the second time I had ever seen my mom cry. She was 12 when it happened.

In grade 8 I got a call from my friend in the middle of the night and she was drunk in the park crying and told me that she went out that night with some other friends and they drank a little and her guy “friend” starting flirting and yes she laughed at first but then he tried to pull her shirt over her head and she pulled away and he ripped her shirt and it was her favourite shirt and then he pushed her to her knees and HIS BEST FRIEND HELD HER JAW OPEN WHILE HE FACE FUCKED HER. And so I went to the park and picked her up and took her home and slept in her bed with her except we didn’t sleep because she just cried and her mouth bled and this was four years ago but I still have to be the one to bring her items to the till it the cashier is a man, and she still has anxiety attacks and she’ll get a rash all over her body and I just want to kill those boys but instead they are still walking around. And I’m in the bathroom with her, dabbing at her skin with a warm cloth until it returns to its regular colour.

And in grade 9 one of my closest friends was kinda seeing this boy and so they hung out one night and then she said that she really had to be getting back home and he said that she wasn’t going anywhere until she gave him what he wanted and he parked the car and took off her clothes and she said no and he ignored her and so she laid in the backseat totally limp and just cried and it wasn’t even sex, he just masterbated by using her body instead of his hand and she came to school the next day with vodka in her water bottle and she drank all day and I had to fight her to get the alcohol away from her and she just cried and threw up and I skipped class while I held her hair back and that same boy texted me a month later, asking if I ever wanted to hangout sometime.

And in that same year my very best friend who has never even kissed a boy, confessed to me that when she was 9 years old, her 12 year old cousin made her give him a hand job and he told her that was what cousins do and he gave her a chocolate bar afterwards and she told me that he probably doesn’t even remember it but that it’s something that she’ll never have the luxury of forgetting.

And in grade 10 I knew a girl who invited her best friend over to watch Disney movies and then he started to put his hands down her pants and she said no but she is 130lbs and he is 220lbs and he called her a tease while she tried to fight him but he used one hand to hold her down, and the other to put inside of her and i was the one to push her inside of a classroom and stand in front of her while calling the police when he showed up at our school looking for her and she was so damn scared.

And a few months later I skipped class and was in the car with a guy who i had had unprotected sex with in the past while under the influence of cocaine but this time I was sober and I insisted we use a condom but he told me he couldn’t feel anything while the condom was on so he ripped it off and I said I refused to have unprotected sex again and so he just grabbed me and forced himself into my mouth and I was crying and he pulled me onto him and I just kept saying “stop” over and over like a broken record but he must’ve heard something different because he went until he came and I just sat naked in the backseat while he drove me back to the school and said “we should do this again sometime”. And I had five showers that night and I scratched at my skin so hard to try and rip his fingerprints off of me, I still have the scars.

And I found out soon afterwards that that same guy had raped a classmate of mine, 5 months earlier and she told me about how he brought her McDonald’s first, and how he said they could take things slow and she told me about how he didn’t listen to her either. And he goes to our school and so after she told me about her incident and I told her about mine, we decided to report it to the police and the trial is currently still going on and he told people about it, except in his version we are just “asking for attention” and all his friends talk about how bad they feel for him. As if HE is the one that still wakes up screaming. As if HE felt like his skin no longer was beautiful, no longer belonged to him. And I held her in my arms as she bawled after giving the police her statement. And she did the same for me.

And I met a woman a year ago in a paint store and she had a service dog and I asked what the dog was for and it turns out that she had been so brutally raped and abused in her life, that the dog is literally trained to keep men away from her.

And I’m so FUCKING SICK AND TIRED OF THIS WORLD WE ARE LIVING IN. How many rape victims eyes have I already looked into? How many more will I? And how many more friends will I hold while they shake? Because I don’t know how many more I can take. And who the fuck still has the nerve to make rape jokes? And… Something just has to change. Please, someone just start being that change.

-16 year old girl