Heyo

Gonna have to cancel today's stream as well. My room is nearly cleaned just gotta double check everything, hopefully i’ll be able to sleep in my bed again soon 👏😭

I might be able to stream on Thursday depending on my room’s status but I'm not gonna say anything just in case 😔

Gonna be a bit late to the stream tonight, my computer is being a little shit >:T

Today's stream is gonna be a bit depressing.

This week has been genuinely harsh to me and mom, but today we had found out that a lot of our things back at the old house I had mentioned before is officially gone.

I barely held it together after hearing that, but on stream I ended up getting emotional while explaining what happened.

Im sorry to everyone that watches my streams to relax and get away from your own harsh realities, I just needed to express my deep sadness of losing a lot of items i might never get back. Some that had been given to me by my dad, such as books and knives he used to collect.

I genuinely don't know what to do anymore and after this week, I don't think I ever will. Im tired. I just want to rest and stop fighting what is just a losing battle with life.

Currently on stream im just trying to do a quick edit on the minecraft vod on youtube and pulling up a video for chat to watch so you guys don't have to sit there and hear my sniffling the whole time.

Hopefully I can bounce back from this but we will see tomorrow.

Thank you for reading and in sorry for bringing down the mood on stream.

Ok so interesting event that happened yesterday.

So I had been awake all night ereyesterday (I have a really bad sleeping schedule) and I had wanted to play the summer event in Genshin with mom, alas mom's computer had a large update that took almost all day to finish.

So I waited and eventually, I fell asleep on my books again (long story). I woke up a bit later, figuring that I should put my computer and desk away so I can lay down properly instead of sleeping on my books. So I do so, I lay down and I end up falling asleep again.

ONLY TO WAKE UP FROM MY ROOF CAVEING IN FROM A FUCKING RACCOON FALLING THROUGH IT.

So here I am, half awake from this sudden cave-in of the furry kind, with this fucking raccoon looking just as lost and confused from falling through the roof as I was. I panicked because I knew that while raccoons are cute and fluffy, they are not the best animal neighbors.

So I yell for mom to quickly close all of the doors after telling her a raccoon just fell through my roof. She comes back and we try and get the ball of chonk out of my room, and to be fair we did success without the little guy getting mad, but then he was stuck in the hallway.

Tbh idk what fully happened because mom had closed my door after the chonky trash nommer left but apparently he had somehow got on top of my dresser in the hallway and then fell and knocked a bunch of shit over, before running past the open front door, into the living room, and into her room.

So now we have a fluffy chonker causing chaos and mayhem in her room and we have no idea wtf to do. This all happened around 8:30ish at night btw.

So we try making noise, keeping the lights on, using vinegar to try and get it out of the room, we tried to use brooms and find him but we end up not finding him because this bitch just straight up disappeared. We have no idea if he is still in the house as I am writing this post, and trust me she looked all over that room.

So ok, we open the window, yeet open the screen, and then close the door so the fluffy menace can at least leave when we aren't trying to find it, that's the best we can do besides calling animal control which, we don't have money for.

So my stressed ass was getting tired again (my stress reaction is to fall asleep), but I felt legit gross and was stressing over the fact that I might have installation all over me (the hole is close to where my head was resting at) so I take a quick shower before I get to work cleaning my room of wet as hell installation. Listen, I know I needed to get my ass into gear and do some spring summer cleaning, but this was not how I wanted to do it Q_Q

Also yes, I wore a mask and gloves so worry not. It didn't help how gross it all was. Me, being scared for my health cuz that shit went everywhere, decided to sleep out in the living room with mom (who also had to sleep in the living room). Suffice it to say this was a very weird girls' night >_>

Me and mom had been up almost the whole night and only got any sleep around 3:30-4 A.M. and woke up around 8-9 a.m. so if this post seems disjointed that's why o(-<

Long story short a trash disaster broke through my roof mission impossible style, caused chaos, doesn't elaborate, then hoodini'ed into another dimension before we could find him, leaving me to clean up ceiling bits like a confused spouse after their partner came home slam assed drunk and just passed out on top of the fridge.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND HAPPY NEW YEARS EVERYONE!!!!!

(Cylestia is my mom btw! :D)

I hope everyone has a wonderful new year and happy holidays! Let's go into the new year head held high for we survived another year!

Image w/out words under read more :D

Yes the lighting looks weird and the mugs look off, but I still hope this makes everyone feel cozy and warm in the end! uwu

“恣意天変” (capricious natural disaster) full Diasomnia song mv

with mp3 download

I need to post more on here lmao One of these days I will be stable enough to stream again, I wanna replay Goetia so badly. The music just keeps dragging me back in man, it is so melancholic and so good T0T Plus, I never finished it on stream, oops ''>w> Maybe I'll post stuff about the character's in Blue's story as well so people can know I'm still here lol I wanna show some off, like her close friends and Knowledge Seeker, but I still need to finalize their designs. orz I had just recently re-wrote one of their backgrounds so we'll see who shows up first lol

Ok so I've been seeing complaints about Book 7's ending by a few minority not only here, but from other platforms as well. While everyone is of course allowed to dislike something, let's tackle a few points:

Malleus deserved a harsher punishment

Everyone witnessed Diasomnia's moment. Everybody knew he accidentally killed Lilia. Everyone knows how much Lilia means to Malleus. So everyone knows that there's no punishment harsher than the eternal scar of accidentally killing your own father.

And that's not enough, because he lost majority of his power. THIS is his prolonged punishment. We should remember that his entire life revolved around being the strongest, so all of his foundation hinged on that. If you're an artist, it's like losing your dominant hand and having to relearn how to draw with your other. Except in his case it's like losing both his hands so he needs to learn how to draw with his feet.

While it's true that he's far happier now than he was when he was strong, that doesn't mean he won't go through so much suffering as a consequence. For 200 years. 200 years of being weak means he's not fit to be king; no Dark Fae will follow a man akin to a common Fae. His nobles will not respect him. He's now a very easy target, since he's not indestructible anymore.

This basically means he's currently a pretty decoration to Briar Valley. An unemployed trust fund kid. Random people will likely mock him or treat him like an amusing animal in a zoo.

Which means he will have to build his reputation from the ground up, against all odds, as a disgraced prince.

Malleus tried to kill x and x

No he did not. He genuinely thought he found a breakthrough and was doing the world a service by making immortality accessible to everyone. Remember that he used to be the strongest; he thought nobody was just capable of this feat until he did.

He was quite literally insane at that moment. When he did accidentally kill Lilia, he snapped to his senses and immediately reacted like a small child. He doesn't want to believe it, because he would never do something like that. He simply doesn't want to kill anyone-- what he wanted was the opposite: that nobody needs to die anymore.

Everybody left him off the hook so easily

We get a lot of scenes explaining this. Sure maybe for you their reasons are bullshit, but the fact is that this is a Disney story. He would never be executed. But the following are from different accounts from different characters.

There were actually very few injured, because even though he was insane in dragon form, a part of his morality was there and he unconsciously avoided hurting people as much as possible. There are more injuries that happen in Spelldrive than who Malleus injured, according to Epel.

For the rest of the student body, they were simply having the best dreams of their lives. Many compared to it an amusement park and want to experience it again.

The other overblotters tried to protest, but were reminded that they too almost killed people. Some were genuinely out to kill people while Malleus wasn't.

Most people on Sage Island are actually good people, unlike NRC students. They embody the values of Fantasia Mickey, where the apprentice was given a second chance instead of being exiled because he showed actual remorse.

He is entitled and thinks he's always right

Yes he's entitled. But that's part of his character. He thought he was right, insisted he was right, but when he was defeated and told otherwise, he accepted it wholeheartedly. He was the only overblotter who actually apologized in public, recognized he did wrong, thanked everyone for helping him, and swore he will become a better man.

He literally can't take back anything that's happened. Kicking him further will not achieve anything.

Why didn't he talk it out with Yuu instead of immediately jumping to overblot

He doesn't even understand that he's feeling something negative. Nobody taught him to recognize his own feelings. He was raised to be strong and independent, so his first instinct was to deal with the problem himself.

He can't even talk it out with Lilia and Silver; there was no way he could talk it out to a friend he just met that year.

His power literally hurts his surroundings when he tries to feel things. He's likely afraid of accidentally striking someone with lightning or drowning them in storms if he admits that he's feeling down.

He didn't know too much negative feelings could lead to an overblot. He was already out of his mind before he knew it.

There could be more but these are off the top of my head.

I think for tonights stream I'm gonna just sit and relax with some vids or something. I'll start SH4 on Monday so I can play through it without stopping the story for a whole 4 days :3

I'll try to work on the other SH videos, I've been busy from finishing SH1's video and my computer is running out of space hoarding these 4-5 hour streams 'owo!