Leangreenfreakmachine - Chickenbutt

thought about what a robin to the absolute!batman would look like. conclusion: small

you! tumblr user!

it all depends on the lighting or something

i don't think the hulk exists due to gamma radiation. i think getting 7 PhDs just does that to you

JOE FIXIT from THE HULK (MARVEL COMICS)

JUSTIFICATION:

"An alter created based on old mobster movies, literally a constructed ideal of masculinity Experiences severe body dysphoria when she has to use Bruce's body instead of her own, euphoric when she regains the body that is her own Talks about trans rights on multiple occasions" - @wickedsick

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crying real tears at this burn…there’s no way to come back from Batman calling you on your bullshit like that

Comrade Namor

He teams up with Bruce Banner and most of his alters on an explicit mission to destroy capitalism, starting off by bankrupting the too big to fail Roxxon Corporation (whose CEO is a literal minotaur FYI, the shit kind.) 'Humans' as referred to there is about the destructiveness and unsustainability of how we treat the planet and each other. It's not a genetically loaded term here. Also, he just cooked Bruce a clam chowder. It's nice to look after our friends.

This is an in universe advert from the 90s where he declares war on any company that doesn't respect the planet, AKA all of them. Interestingly he uses inverted Marxist language to threaten from a position of strength - 'the oceans themselves as capital' is so huge a concept. No doubt he was pushing the limits of what critique capitalism can subsume into itself.

It's also strategically fascinating, IMO. Declaring war on countries is a historical Namor tactic with no winners. Corporations have no sovereignty to protect, no allies to call on, and you can't lobby for tariffs on Atlantis.

Except they may as well, because as ever, Marvel presents a liberal fantasy of human improvement and progressiveness. Corporations do what they do with the aid and permission of states, and neoliberalism can't exist without the free market. Marvel itself is profit-first and will never take any action that hinders that (intentionally) - but they will present the 'illusion of change' especially if the message itself is profitable to publish. I'm not saying anything new here, of course, but I think it'd be intellectually dishonest to not point out that the desired and eternal status quo isn't just restricted to the pages.

BEE TEE DUBS, if you haven't read Immortal Hulk, it's amazing. Al Ewing is a master and really pushes the limits of what comics can do, plus the Hulk says trans rights and fuck capitalism!

@bunnydracula

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