Giving Him A Little Nod That He Had It Right, Leyla Offered A Little Smile With The Finished Result.

"Completely understand," Leyla said with a hint of a laugh, "I've got a couple of those myself." She kept telling herself she'd read something that wasn't business or professional development related, and yet, her bag did not contain any such other genre. "I'll still give you exciting," she offered. "Would you recommend it?"

"Oh, I would put it on my tbr list and then swear I'm going to read it for months and months and then not read it, but thank you for the offer." Aleja was too old to not be self aware about her own habits. "They're fairly spicy, but nothing compared to what's popular these days."

Leyla wanted her place to be as good as any other bar, and you could always send those drinks back too. Even if she was very confident in the quality of her menu, everyone had different tastes. "The option is always available," she promised. Since it was her recommendation, Leyla did hope she'd like it. "That's what I thought," she replied with a laugh. "Okay, I'll do it then. Maybe I'll take your recommendation on your favorite flavors." Her brow briefly furrowed as the other woman laughed before she explained. "Good thing I sent the last one into early retirement, so there's a vacancy," she teased, "but I think that's perspective, it could make you an angel."

Valentina nodded. She didn't want the brunette to go out of her way just for her drink but she appreciated the gesture. "I'm sure it'll be just fine." After all, she seemed to know what she was doing with all the mocktails and smoothies. "I'm the only adult who allows them to eat candies, of course I'm their favorite person," she joked. "But yes please, come and have a look. I'll make you an ice cream, if you're not into candy." All of a sudden, she let out a short laugh as she realized something, "You're making me a healthy drink and I'm offering you candy in return, I feel like a little devil on your shoulder."

Some people were more health-conscious than others, neither necessarily better than the other. It had taken Leyla some time to get there, to not over-think everything, but she did want most of her drinks to be on the healthy side to open that up to those who wanted it. Behind the booth was safe, but she didn't come here to be safe. She knew she had to push herself forward or she'd go backwards, even when everything still screamed within her to push people away. "I may have to hide the jam, I have three roommates and one is definitely a snacker," she joked, not actually thinking Darrius would come for her jam but who knew. She laughed about his comment on the grape juices. "Is the pumpkin patch worth adding to my list?" Speaking of things she could see Darrius or Aisha doing, she might need a pumpkin for roomie carving night or whatever they'd call it. "I bet it's fun for the kids. Do you have any?"

"That's very true!" Josh agreed with Leyla on the health ingredients, knowing that he always felt better about being hooked on a soup or salad, or a new smoothie than he did on something fried or full of sugars, not that he was ever someone to try to judge another person's food interests. Josh was very 'eat what makes you happy,' about life. Or more accurately, 'do what makes you happy' in terms of pretty much anything and everything. "Got it… alright," he nodded, taking a sip of the apple cider first, and then reaching for the next one while listening to her talk about her own experience at Creek Fest. He knew from many, many festivals and events spent working with the center that sometimes it was tough to get away, and was glad to hear that she had gotten some time for herself. "Oh, the jam is always so good! And I did see those crochet pumpkins, they're adorable," he beamed. "Just keep them away from any grape juices if you buy them and head that way," he teased, smile on his face. "I think I'll try to do some pumpkin picking after this. Got my fuel, now."

"It truly is," she agreed, "I've never been in a town so small that everyone does things like this and knows everyone else, it's an experience." She found it beautiful, even if she couldn't imagine what that had to feel like to grow up here. It seemed a little magical. As he confirmed that was him, she smiled brightly, "very happy. It's great, a dream. The coast here is beautiful, and I couldn't have imagined a better place to put my bar. You should stop by, a mocktail on me for all your firm's help."

"That's the wild part, isn't it?" he laughed, shaking his head, "not just that everyone spends time together at these events, but that they genuinely enjoy doing it, like seeing each other, hanging out." And they didn't get tired of one another, that was perhaps the most miraculous part of all. "Very nice to meet you, Leyla," he smiled, giving her hand a warm, firm shake before letting his head fall to a tilt when she mentioned the firm. "Yes, that's me. And aha! So you're -- hopefully -- a happy client of ours, then. How is the space working out for you?"

There was a peace in a small town life, but Leyla wasn't sure that meant she had to be out in the crowd. It let people too close to her, and while it was important for her business that people like her, she wasn't sure she wanted people close enough to see her. She saved herself in the end, and she didn't need anyone trying to help anymore: she didn't need friends, she didn't need saviors, she didn't need anyone.

A book kept some away and others to nothing more than a brief exchange of pleasantries, so she kept it on her like a shield. Maybe that's why she immediately held it to her chest when she heard that voice. It sounded so casual--like the first she'd heard it--she thought she might hurl right here. "No, for you, I don't," she finally managed, feeling that old familiar rage she was sure she'd already worked through rise again like a phoenix from ashes. "You have no business in a small town, Vitus." Hasn't he broken enough people?

@leyla-tehrani Beach Bash: August 26, 2023

A life powered by caffeinated beverages and nightlife meant Vitus had no trouble staying up late into the evening, which was exactly what he'd done after setting up his tent last night. The downside, however, was that he often stirred around 11 or noon, and missed most of the morning's festivities. He popped out to discover the sun already blazed high overhead. It bathed the whole beach in dazzling yellow-white, the sand glowing like small embers beneath his feet. The water reflected the light, too, shimmering and sharp against his unadjusted eyes. The circumstances were enough to disorient him, leaving him standing there like a sleepy, stranded sailor.

Luckily, though, there was someone sitting only a few feet off from his tent, her nose buried in a book. "Hey, sorry to bug you, but do you have the time?" Yawning, Vitus rubbed his eyes free of sea salt and blinked, trying to clear his vision.

"I hope not," Leyla said with a slight laugh, "everyone has seemed to like them so far." She wasn't really afraid of that, not in a town like this, but still, she hoped for good feedback. "I'll take hopeless addiction, at least it's mostly healthy ingredients so you can feel relatively guilt-free about it." That was one thing she was really loving about Merrock, everyone was genuinely so kind and supportive of one another. "Apple Cider Mule," She listed off, starting with the one he'd just picked up, "then Autumn Spice, Pumpkin Pie Martini, and Ginger Pear." That way he'd know which one he liked best. "That's the idea, yeah!" She nodded as he asked about her experience, "a little bit. I'm trying to make some time for it because I really do want to see what everyone else has put together. I got some blueberry jam from the Newman Family Farm and this really cute crochet pumpkin." She pulled it out from her bag under the table to show him. "And I plan to catch one of the horseback rides if I can and maybe the Morris Winery. I don't think I'd try it, but I think it might be fun to watch some people grape stomping like that I Love Lucy episode. Where are you headed next?"

"Something tells me that you won't have anyone spitting drinks back out," Josh laughed, shaking his head. Sure, people could have discerning tastes, be picky about the things that they chose to eat and drink, but something told him that no one in this town was going to have a problem with a delicious, fall-themed beverage. "Alright, good deal, that way I know where to go to get my fix once I ended up hopelessly addicted," and then have to find another one that he liked once the Christmas and winter seasons rolled around, that was how this cycle inevitably went, every single time. "Ah, perfect, thank you so much!" He reached for the first drink, admiring the color, and broke into a smile. "I'll definitely end up taking one with me. Feels best to explore a place like this with a drink and snack in hand, doesn't it? Have you gotten the chance to wander around yet?"

"Some of these comments sound like high school all over again," Leyla joked, though she liked seeing everyone in town get so into the competition. Like a really big family. "Please do," she offered, "I guarantee atmosphere." She smiled as the other woman undersold her job a bit. She was not the most tech-savvy, so she admired people who were. "My business relies a lot on technology, so I'd say it's a very sexy job and now I know who to call if my systems go down," she teased.

"Can I? Sure, but I think it makes for a lot messier of a situation." Which was true, but obviously they couldn't control who drank or didn't. Most people could handle it okay but obviously it only took one person going too far. "I would love to stop by sometime, see what it's like and honestly it sounds like a perfect atmosphere , I like quiet sometimes." she said. "Oh." she cleared her throat, it wasn't something she could explain being a hacker, "I work in IT security, an analyst." she shrugged, "Not a very sexy job."

It was important to Leyla to be here, to give back. She had never been good at receiving, but giving came easy. Besides, she'd get to be with horses, what could possibly be wrong about that? Nowadays, she often preferred animals to people.

"Really? That's great," she said as the woman confirmed they were always looking. It perked her up a bit as she patiently waited for the application. "I also own Mawk Tales, down by the coast, so if you ever want to do any sort of fundraiser, let me know," she offered, before gratefully accepting the clipboard. "How long have you been doing this?" She asked as she started on the form.

As much as Livvy loved working as a physical therapist, she enjoyed her work with the horses even more. Getting to watch children get up on a horse's back for the first time, riding around a little arena, being led by the volunteers, going out on trail rides when they had the experience and could handle it; every day, she went home feeling good abotu what she did. That wasn't always something she could say about her time in the office.

"Oh!" she looked up from where she had been polishing a saddle, buffing and buffing at the leather to make it look like new again, and breaking into a smile. "We're always looking or volunteers, actually. As for applications, uhm, give me one second," she set the saddle aside, and scampered into the office, snatching a piece of paper out of one of the drawers and attaching it to a clipboard, turning to make her way back out into the aisle. "Here we are!"

Luckily Leyla liked being busy, especially when that meant her business was doing well. If it kept up though, she might have to start a hiring process. "Then I think you'll really like this," she promised, "and if you don't, I'll make you something else." She did want her drinks to be a little healthier than your average bar, and most drinks were, like this one. "I think I've walked past it before, but I haven't yet made it in there. I don't eat much candy, but maybe I'll stop in sometime just to have a look around. I bet you're the kids' favorite person around here?"

"Oh, no worries," she brushed the apologies away, offering a smile to the woman. Valentina had worked behind a bar in the many different jobs she had taken over the years. She knew how demanding it could be when there was a lot of people all at once. "Honestly, I spend so much time around sweet things", or sweet people she almost added, "that something different sounds perfect to me." Plus she was not going to complain if the drink had some health benefits, too. "I work at Cassidy's Candies. That's nearby. And kids are still on holidays, which means that my days are-- busy. Ice cream and candy and a looot of people on sugar high."

Vitus hadn't built the walls, those were under construction long before him, but he'd been the one to slide under as it sealed shut. Like an action hero. Then, his betrayal had simply melded it in place. Opening up would mean pain, and no amount of therapy had successfully opened the cage that protected her heart, her very brittle, fragile heart.

She hadn't meant to break him--or maybe she had. But she had meant every word. Sleepless nights spent at his side pressing all the broken pieces back together, solid when he shook, warm when he was too exhausted to fall easily into dreams, a breath when he couldn't find air. There was never anywhere else she wanted to be. The irony of the Lighthouse in view wasn't lost on her. She had tried to be a light in the storm, a guide back home. Even when it got complicated, it was easy. And it wasn't enough.

She wanted answers. Answers he couldn't offer, ones she wasn't even sure would make her feel better. "Deep breaths," she whispered, cursing herself for showing him any mercy. She had sworn to herself she wouldn't if they were ever to cross paths again, but they were the same broken. "You need to find out why," she said, "the people you'll keep hurting until you do, they deserve that."

His promise that he did love her went unacknowledged because she did know he had, but it hadn't been real. Real love, if it existed, did not do what he did. She simply chose to no longer believe. Part of her would have given him her hand, let him find comfort in it. In her. But she couldn't, she had to protect herself first. No one else was going to.

"Please stop saying sorry," she breathed out, a single stray tear sliding down her cheek unchecked, "you had reason to worry, and I know I have punished you enough. But I don't want your apology. You broke my heart, you broke my trust, you made my nightmare a reality. Someone newer, shinier, thinner, prettier, more exciting, whatever it was. I know you said it wasn't me, and I know that, but you can see how I'll struggle with that anyway, right? I asked you for faithfulness, a lot of other people make different arrangements. You could have just told me you didn't want to do that anymore." She was circling back to the question that screamed in echos within her mind. Why, why, why. And there was no why. With an exhale, she let it go out with the waves retreating back into the ocean. At least for now. "Deep breaths, Vitus, take deep breaths."

Vitus had hoped for something softer, with her, after all these years. Time had a way of doing that—taking the bite out of memories, until the once-visceral pain turned phantom, like a long-gone limb. But Leyla's eyes didn't melt into her core like his own did. Her voice didn't compress and fold itself over, bowing under the weight of him. No, Leyla remained as hardened and sharp as the day he lost her.

Out on the beach in broad daylight, the last event of summer buzzing around him, Vitus was trying his best not to cry. But then she said that—You were easy to love. Why wasn't that enough?—and the thing in his chest quit howling long enough to crumble. It punched a shuddering breath out of his lungs. Vitus wrapped his arms around himself, trying to stabilize, as the first tears finally tipped over and fell down his face.

He had never thought himself easy to love, but especially not when he was in his twenties, and especially not when they met. Leyla had held him on the bathroom floor while his hands shook, on the tail end of a coke comedown. She'd seen him crawl into bed at four in the morning, exhausted and empty after draining sessions with his clients. She'd let him cry into the cradle of her neck after a day's worth of panic attacks as he tried to build a new place in his life for his parents. And through it all, she'd loved him. She'd loved him, she'd loved him. And he'd loved her too, because she knew what it was, to live like that. To be shredded and unwilling to look at her pieces long enough to reassemble them.

And yet. He'd still cheated on her. And then he'd done it again, and again, and again, to other partners that came after her. How many people had come up against his fever, promised to love him through it, only to end up burning to death in his arms?

"I don't... know. I mean, yes, but it wasn't you," he said again, speaking through the guilt pouring down his cheeks. Vitus pawed at his face, if only to save her the sight of him like that, but it didn't quite work. "Nothing is ever enough. I don't know why. I wish I could tell you, but I don't—Something in me is just—" He gestured at his sternum, trying to indicate the ache in there, the beast that had been demanding more more more for as long as he could remember. "I know how much you loved me. And I loved you like that too. I really did."

To make matters worse—Leyla's lips quivered, too, and Vitus immediately wanted to step forward. He wanted to reach, offer his open palm to her, say what can I give you? just like he did the night they met. He didn't. He stayed in place, battered by guilt over the fact that he had broken her so severely ten years ago that she still didn't believe in love, still couldn't talk to him without crying.

"I'm sorry. I'm really glad you're doing better. I worried about you, a lot, after—" A sniffle. Another hand across his face, as if he could wipe his identity right off of himself, bury it in the sand, and start fresh as someone new. "I'm so sorry, Leyla. I know it can't fix anything. But I just—I never stopped being sorry."