Here’s The Orbital Period Of Our Solar System’s 8 Major Planets (how Long It Takes Each To Travel

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Rock Apparently Factors Into Girlfriend’s Shower Routine

SEATTLE—Saying he was confused about the full extent of its purpose as well as its overall benefit, local man Jacob Ferris, 25, nonetheless surmised today that the oblong rock located in girlfriend Sarah Milstein’s shower caddy must somehow factor into her bathing routine, sources confirmed.

“I guess at some point while she’s showering, she rubs a rock on her body,” said Ferris, expressing what he claimed was “the only possible conclusion” about the light-gray rock in his girlfriend’s bathroom. “I mean, it looks sort of nice, so she could just have it there for decoration or something. But it’s usually right near all the other soaps and her loofah, so I think it’s probably something she actually uses while under the water.”

“I really don’t know how it all works,” Ferris added. “All I know is that in between Sarah getting into the shower and getting out, there’s a rock involved.”

Ferris, who said he was unable to determine exactly when in the showering process the rock first comes into play, told reporters he is equally clueless about what part of the body the rock is used on.

In addition, Ferris said he occasionally inspects the roughly 3-ounce object when he’s in Milstein’s shower, and told reporters that the rock is nearly always wet and is occasionally moved to slightly different spots within the bathtub, leading him to believe that his girlfriend uses it fairly regularly. He also noted his girlfriend’s bathing time never seems particularly longer than the average person’s considering she has added a rock into the mix.

Ferris added that all attempts to incorporate the rock into his own shower routine have ultimately been unsuccessful.

“I tried rubbing it on my skin once, and it hurt,” Ferris said, concluding that pouring soap and water directly onto the rock neither made it softer nor easier on his skin. “I could maybe see how it could get some dirt off of your body, but it seems too painful to work. Her skin usually looks nice though, so maybe I’m wrong.”

“There is a chance it could be a hair thing,” Ferris continued. “Maybe she rubs the rock in her hair? I don’t know.”

Ferris confirmed he has considered numerous reasons for why his girlfriend uses the rock in the shower, including that she has some type of skin condition, that the rock is some sort of weird tradition her family has, or that everyone uses rocks in the shower and he has been out of the loop the entire time.

“It could be for cleaning the bathtub,” said Ferris, adding he once suspected the rock was a device for making the bathroom smell nice, but then noticed it had no discernible smell whatsoever. “Like every few weekends she scrubs the tub with this rock? I guess I could see Sarah doing that.”

While Ferris said he is mostly certain that the rock was initially purchased at a home goods store of some kind, he was not able to completely rule out the possibility it was just a rock that his girlfriend found on the ground and decided to put in her shower.

“I wonder if I should put a rock in my shower for when she’s over here,” said Ferris, who said he once tried to locate a rock at a Bed Bath & Beyond, but left after not wanting to walk up to a sales clerk and ask them where they kept their “shower rocks.” “Or I could just tell her to leave a rock at my place if she wants.”

“I’m probably not going to do that,” Ferris added.

At press time, a visibly perplexed Ferris had seen the rock sitting in Milstein’s trashcan and then looked in the shower to see another rock sitting in its place.

When you get brutally splatted by 3 people ganging up on you and a teammate is super jumping to your position

A mozzarella stick!

Happy oscars day here’s some history about asians at the academy awards:

No asian producers have ever won best picture (although six have been nominated)

Ben Kingsley is the only asian to ever be nominated for or win best actor

No asian woman has ever won best actress, and the only time an asian woman has ever been nominated (Merle Oberon in The Dark Angel) was almost a century ago

Out of seven nominated over the years, only one asian has ever won best supporting actor (Haing S. Ngor for The Killing Fields in 1984)

In 1957, Miyoshi Umeki became the first asian woman to win best supporting actress for her role in Sayonara. No asian woman has won since then, although four have been nominated. 

Ang Lee was the first (and so far only) asian person to win best director, and he’s done it twice. Once in 2005 for Brokeback Mountain, and again in 2012 for Life of Pi. 

No asian has ever won best adapted screenplay, and only two have ever been nominated (Wang Hui-ling and Tsai Kuo Jung for Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon in 2000).

An asian has never won best original screenplay, but that could change tonight since Kumail Nanjiani is nominated (with Emily V. Gordon) for The Big Sick. He is also the only asian nominated in a major category at this year’s oscars.

I don’t have a profound note to end this on. All I can say is that the system is broken from the ground up. The problem isn’t really that asians aren’t being recognized for the work they do in western media. The problem is that asians generally aren’t being given the chance to do that work in the first place.

When It’s Finally Hoodie Weather

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That was an emotional roller coaster in 6 seconds

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"We’ll be at Hogwarts in ten minutes," said Professor Lupin. "Are you alright, Harry?" Harry didn’t ask how Professor Lupin knew his name.

-The first time Lupin addresses Harry by his name

Rereading the books, this interaction breaks my heart. Because the first time you read it, you assume Lupin knows who he is because he’s Harry, and that he recognises his scar or he’s seen Harry’s picture in the papers, maybe. But once you’ve read the books, you know that it’s because Lupin’s seen that face before. Harry looks only a little older than James did when Lupin first met him - he probably still has photographs of the Marauders at that age. Harry looks about the age that James did when he found out that Lupin was a werewolf - a terrible, dangerous, Dark creature - and told Lupin that he didn’t care. He looks exactly like James did when he was a teenager - except with Lily’s eyes.

Lupin recognises Harry because it’s the face of his best friends’ son. He probably held Harry as a baby, not long after he’d been born, with James and Lily smiling happily over him. He probably watched Harry toddle around their house in Godric’s Hollow when he was first learning to walk. 

And it reminds Lupin of everything he lost that night when James and Lily died, and Sirius went on the run. 

That’s how he knows Harry’s name.

(via he-is-your-glass-of-tea)