BYE

Best opening scene 

Fellas is it gay to take care of your children?

Why would anyone want to consume it!?

me, drinking tea: pls leaf water….sage my body of the demons of my past…steam my colon…let me know peace

me, drinking coffee: I beg of u bean juice….cleanse me of the curse of sleep….make my heart beat like a tribal drum in ceremony….let me conquer this building

centrists: rioting is ALWAYS wrong

centrists when theres no rick and morty mcdonald sauce:

Rihanna and her cute little puppy “PePe”.

hypothesis: the salt & pepper diner experiment can no longer be conducted as it stands, because everyone is now fully attuned to the opening bars of tom jones’ “what’s new pussycat?”, classically conditioned into a fight-or-flight response. however, this experience can be replicated using 21 back-to-back plays of lou bega’s 1999 hit song “mambo no. 5″, as the general response to “mambo no. 5″ being played twice in a row is not, “hey someone’s playing “mambo no. 5″ again,” but rather, “hey, lou bega’s 1999 hit song “mambo no. 5″ is a lot longer than i first thought.”