Like-luke-likes - Like-Luke-Likes

“Do you think that guy is gay?”

“Roll a Perception check.”

Petition to sit down all the people who make coma theories about Adventure Time and tell them “listen, this fucking show is about the last human living in a post-apocalyptic world where deadly magic has been reawakened following a global thermonuclear war that wiped out the rest of the human species, how much fucking darker do you want it to be”

The entire internet needs to see this.

Great Understatements in History

offspring: d...da.....

parent: are you trying to say your first word??? what is it?? daddy? is it daddy?

offspring: dance fucker dance. man he never had a chance. and no one even knew it was really only you

parent: you're gonna go far, kid.

september is coming up so here’s your yearly reminder to leave billie joe armstrong the fuck alone

Audience Member: What’s your favorite flavor of ice cream?

Trump: I just want to say that I’ve been a long time lover of Ice Cream. I liked Ice Cream before anyone else, and, in fact, I own stock in every ice cream company ever made ever. And you know ice cream is made from milk from cows. Cows that Obama poisoned by peeing in the grass fields. And now 100% of 40% of cows have manic depression-