Danny Sees No Problem With This. Fighting Is How Ghosts Say Hello, After All, And Establishing Territory

Ohoho, this is beautiful. Unfourtanetly, Hunter's ideas of how to be a Good Nephew are entirely based off of what Belos wanted from him. Some things, Hunter now knows is wrong. Other, more subtle things... Not so much.

Hunter makes food as an act of service, because Lillith, most likely, does not want Hunter to go hunt palismen for her. Lilith wonders if it's poisoned.

Hunter calls out to her every time she enters the room to announce her presence, like he used to herald for Belos. Lilith, an introvert, thinks this is some kind of passive aggressive attack on her.

It all comes to a head when Lillith snaps at Hunter, and his immediate reaction is to kneel and beg for forgiveness, because that's what you do when you're a Bad Nephew... isn't it?

I'm seething at the untapped potential of the Lilith And Hunter dynamic, imagine going to see your sister and seeing that your former colleague/rival is sleeping on her couch in the ugliest shirt you've ever seen, he looks like he hasn't slept in 4 days (normal) and has also been crying (not as normal) and then your sister tells you he's wanted for treason and he is now your new nephew, you suddenly remember the time you tried to trip this kid down a flight of stairs and tore up his Limited Addition Emperors Coven Poster when he asked you to sign it, and by the look on his face he ALSO remembers and he doesn't plan to forget OR forgive your transgressions

In a dimension with Fentons (doesn't matter which one), the IRS made a multilayered magic contract that banned the Fentons from ever having to pay their taxes and, by extension, be the IRS's problem. This magic contract transcends dimensions. This is good for Danny and terrifying for everyone else.

you’ve inspired me so here’s a thing you can do whatever with cause I got a migraine and lost my train of thought

so Danny’s working the bar at the iceberg lounge and notices more people are stress drinking, even the Big Names and asks what’s up only to find it’s ✨Tax Season✨

Danny: oh I always forget about that

someone: (aghast) you don’t pay your taxes

Danny: *shrugs* I’m not allowed to pay taxes

wtf does that mean, is he exempt, someone asks but no Danny explains that the first and only time he tried to pay his taxes he received a full refund and a cease and desist order

word gets around and not even the joker want to mess with Danny because what kind of a monster can scare the irs

(This is actually an inherited problem from his parents)

"What did you just say?" Danny looks up from where he is mixing drinks. Across from him is a purple suit-wearing clown- he hates clowns, so he was attempting not to make eye contact- whose whole white face is twitching slightly.

Danny blinks slowly, using every ounce of self-control to not give in to the urge to reach across the bar and slap him. After a moment, he answered, "I always forget tax season."

"You're crazy enough to take on the IRS?" The clown's jaw drops. "I mean Batman, sure, I understand that, but the IRS?"

Danny frowns. "I don't take them on. I don't have to do my taxes."

"How?" A man in a suit covered in question marks demands from further down the bar.

He shrugs his shoulders a little. "I tried it once, but they sent me a full refund and a cease and desist order. They only remind me that I cannot file taxes now."

"Prove it," A man covered in scales hisses.

Danny grabs a rag, using it to clean off the lemon juice. He reaches into his apron pocket, pulling out a folded-up letter. He could have left it in his locker, but stuff always went missing there. Best to keep his stuff on his person while working. "Sure. Here I have it now. I went to the post office before my shift-hey!"

The lade covered in leaves yanks the letter out of his hand, unfolding it and reading the words as though it wasn't a federal crime. Her voice wavers when she gets to the reminder that the United States of America Internal Revenue Service would not stand another attempt at Daniel Fenton's taxes.

"This can't be real," She scoffs, but there is an underline of worry in her voice that she can't entirely hide.

She turns to a man in a strange white and black suit- like it's evenly split down the middle strange. It matches his face, though; one side is gorgeous, and the other is deformed. "This isn't real, is it Two-Face?"

Two-face takes the paper from her hand, carefully reading the words before pulling out his phone and typing away. After a few seconds, he pauses, then gasps. "It's real. My boys just confirmed the Tax ID number. He is not legally allowed to do taxes."

"Holly Molly, you're insane," the clown gasped, backing out of the seat while pointing at Danny as though he was the devil. "Stay away from me you lunitic! I'm not messing with the IRS's boogie man!"

He turned tail and ran, leaving behind a stunned Danny, wondering what he could have said to earn that reaction. His parents back home were also ordered to not do their taxes. It's common.

He turns to his other customers, ready to take their order, but they all pale and quickly duck away from him as well.

Strange.

Then, Danny notices the silence that has fallen upon the Iceberg Lounge. Even the music has been cut off as everyone stares at him in disbelief.

He shifts, a little uncomfortable with the stares. Danny has never grown used to attention, no matter how much he craved it as a teenager. He always wanted to be in the It Crowd and be given an official membership to the A-listers, but he grew to understand that the only way they liked seeing him was in pain.

So Danny learned to avoid attention as he could, which wasn't complex as the part of the town's freaks, but the very few mintues someone did pay attention to him something terrible ended up happening.

Dash stuffed him into a locker while classmates laughed and cheered the bully on.

A teacher calling on him just to make him feel stupid.

His parents realized he was slipping in his grades and reminded him that he was a failure to the family's intelligence.

Or some random GIW agent that "banished" him from his Earth, flinging Danny straight across the universe to whatever hellhole Gotham crawled out of.

He barely got this bartending job only a few weeks ago- lying about his age which he thinks his boss doesn't care about- and using a shade of an old bartender to coach him in mixology.

Shades were different from ghosts. For one thing, they were weaker and unable to be seen by regular people. They could not interact with the world and often didn't even know they were dead. If Danny had been able to see them before the portal, he would have known they were the cause of what is commonly known as a "ghost."

They were the myths.

Jeff Ricci is Shade, one who is aware he died. He was killed in a gang shoot-out a few years after he and his sister ran away from an abusive home. They traveled through three states, dodging police and CPS, before they disappeared among Gotham's homeless population.

The pair of siblings survived for a while doing odd jobs for local gangs- things like drug runs or helping them move guns- which is why Jeff was out there the night the fight broke out.

It was an imperfect stroke of luck, the wrong place and time. The two had been doing so well, too. They had both gotten jobs at the Iceberg Lounge, lying about their ages, where Jeff was a dishwasher, and Lucia was a housekeeper.

After hours, Jeff was taught by his coworkers how to properly mix drinks, waiting for Lucia to finish her job. When the two turned eighteen, Lucia became a waitress, and Jeff joined the bar- though if anyone asked or checked their employee records, both were twenty-one.

With better pay and hours, they could rent an apartment, finally gaining a home after three years of homelessness. Jeff had lived in that home for only a month when he accepted a job to buy Lucia some migraine medication and had perished.

Lucia lived on without her twin, broken far more than before, but she still had the apartment and job at the Iceberg Lounge. She was unaware her brother still followed her around, watching her actaully turn twenty-one while he remained eighteen.

That's how Danny met him, a somewhat see-through man casually following one of the prettiest waitresses. He had assumed he was being a creep, but Jeff had been delighted that someone could not only see him but was willing to protect his sister by threatening him away from her.

In exchange for lessons on proper mixing, Jeff asked Danny to keep an eye on his sister. Help her when he could not. It was a fair trade from one younger brother to another.

The shade is currently leaning against the counter beside Danny, staring at him as though Danny was a god. "You scare the Joker. Shit, Danny, I knew you were some kind of Rouge in the making, but to take out heavy hitters like this before your debut!? That's just terrifying! Would you be willing to pay my sister to be your secretary or something? She's a great typer!"

What a strange place Gotham is.

Dan: NOBODY MESSES WITH THESE KIDS-

Realizes the teen heroes are Right There.

Dan: Uh, except me. Muahah.

Dan, reformed after three millennia in an isolated time pocket and lots of therapy, decides to try being a hero again.

Only, he's not very good at it. He looks fucking terrifying, and when people see him they tend to run towards the actual danger to get away.

So he's hanging out, invisible, on a random cities rooftop, when a pair of kid vigilantes plop down and start complaining how their mentors don't trust them ecause they haven't had any real combat experience. But to get experience, they need to be out there!

So while these teenagers plan something monumentally stupid, Dan realizes he has a unique opportunity.

Dan becomes a training villain.

A villain that specifically is meant to test kid vigilantes.

He does stupid, petty villain shit and the adult heroes quickly realize that this villain, instead of hurting their kid sidekicks, is teaching them between blows.

Dan's powers are nothing to sneeze at, so a kid vigilante holding their own against him for at least four minutes is considered impressive.

But he never, ever, hurts the kids.

There was an incident where another villain hurt a kid in front of Dan.

No one knows where that villain is.

@simplestoryteller

Killed it dead, no regrets.

When you have too long of a conversation in the comments on ao3 it starts to look like this on mobile. We broke it lmao

@lirabuswavi

I'm always saying dictionary-ass bullshit like "heretofore" and "by dint of" and I'm always so paranoid that it sounds like I'm being pretentious but I promise this is how I talk and I really am just a freak

pls don’t let this flop

If any of us entered a fae deal, all it would take is posting it on Tumblr to get a pile of assorted loopholes.

Gimme a minute, troll with a riddle, my mutual is typing.

A fae being stands before you.

“Every day you will receive one thousand dollars in your bank account. But every time you lift a glass to your lips to take a drink, you will hit your front teeth on the first try. Every. Time. Do you accept this deal?”

However, Batman isn't about to out this kids identity. It's his to choose to reveal (he isn't a hypocrite, and the situation has been dealt with. No one is getting hurt). And besides, the Justice League needs to work on their deductive skills. They can practice with the kid, and Danny gets to pepper Martian Manhunter with space questions. Win-win.

Dc x dp idea 13?

Danny just gaslighting the JL and JLD.

They summoned the ghost king obviously Danny shows up cause i love that for him. He’s in human form. He does that on purpose.

Must ppl assume they messed up send him back and leave it at that. Nope not these people.

Constantine is checking the summoning circle again. Just tells Danny he won’t fall for his disguise and that he knows that he’s ghost king. And says he wants to make a deal.

Danny knows this man sells his souls more then his parents claim they want to tear phantom up molecule by molecule and he has no use for a soul anyways. So Danny just says if i was a king i wouldn’t be failing high school. He wouldn’t even go to high school.

Then Danny goes on about how he has a bully so obviously he couldn’t be a king. Not to mention his human non royal parents. They were mad scientist and ghost hunters but that’s as interesting as they got. Also hello he is alive what did Constantine think he was secretly a ghost.

Danny then walks around the circle just pointing at the total correct symbols going are you sure it’s meant to be a crown. What if this king is a queen and has a tiara. Like who are you to assume it’s a king if you’ve never met them.

John isn’t falling for it at all. Now everyone else is doubting him. Batman pulled up Danny on the computer a perfectly normal human child. So Danny is gonna pull out the big guns. Looks at him and goes if i step out will that prove I’m not currently the ghost king.

It’s one of the other JLD members who says he wouldn’t be able to if he was king. It was warded to keep the king in. So Danny who is currently human just steps out.

See he’s totally not the just king. Currently.

Turns out they needed someone to deal with the box ghost. Danny just say oh i got that. He soups him and goes i did say my parents were ghost hunters

Danny failed to realize once he stepped out of the circle they couldn’t send him back that way. So now he is stuck being questioned but hey at least he is in space.

Send this to other bloggers that you think are wonderful. Keep the game going, make someone smile!!! ♡♡♡

😊