What If I *remembers That Making Suicide Jokes Is Not Conducive With My Goal Of Improving The Wellbeing

i wish i’d read radio silence before starting university instead of halfway through my final year …

Sometimes I think this world is cruel and unjust but then I remember how I dropped my wallet when I was on the bicycle 8 years ago and a homeless man ran 6 blocks to return it to me. Sometimes I think this world is lonely and grey but then I let the rain touch my body and hear birds make their way home at evening and for a moment, just a moment- I understand why Prometheus stole fire and laid it at man's feet, why dying stars leave a trail of wishes, why I still love 6-year-old Erica I met on a summer trip a decade ago, even though I never saw her again.

Sometimes I think this world is a bad place, but then I look around me and in all its chaos and mosaic of bodies and souls and dreams, I see beauty and goodness hidden behind kind eyes and rough hands.

-Ritika Jyala, excerpt from The world is a sphere of ice and our hands are made of fire

Tektober on Instagram

dont need dick i got tubes inside me

u know. funeral phoebe bridgers made me insane for extremely obvious reasons but specifically “last night i passed out in my car and woke up in my childhood bed. wishing i was someone else feeling sorry for myself then i remember someones kid is dead.” bc its just. the terrible self-loathing of being affected by crises when those crises are happening to other people. im not dead. i feel terrible because someone is dead, but it isn’t me. how to epitomize the horrible in betweenness of young adulthood. stifled by the constructs of childhood but wishing desperately for the security of it. the concentricity of personal crises and coming of age. and at the end of the of it all, someone’s kid is dead. and someone’s kid will always be dead. 

You tell a lot of people you love them..

That’s the point of living, dummy.

you need to live to be a weird funny old person whos weirdness was not broken by a rigidly formal world and to do that you must be a weird you now and not be broken despite it all

In another universe, you would still love me. You would let me know you loved me. in another universe, it would be us, you and me,  and you wouldn’t drop my hand and my heart like they were unbreakable.