love when a moot likes my post after being away for a day or so ... like welcome back babe!!!
in case the first one's too weird, perhaps the phrase 'bruised heart', because ive been listening to pink ladies again and have a problem - @pigeonwit
"I guarantee you, you don't want me. You don't."
The words hit Jack like a truck.
When he told himself he was going to finally confess to David today, when he ran through all of the options and avenues for the conversation while on the thirty minute subway ride, he never once considered this option. The option where David thought he wouldn't be good enough, the one where he would say-- that.
Jack's mouth opens and closes for a few moments, the words lodged in his throat, before he chokes out, "What?"
To his credit, David laughs. It's not a happy sound, though- no, it's defeated, and trails off into a sigh at the tail-end of it. As he drops his shoulders, David's gaze flick's to Jack's across the table, before dropping back down to his clasped hands next to his cup of coffee. "You don't want me," David says easily, like it's a fact. Like it doesn't rip Jack in two.
"No, I heard you," Jack says, leaning a little further in, but he makes sure to keep his voice down- he doesn't need the rest of the cafe hearing this. Why he decided to do this in public, he doesn't know anymore, but he felt like he was going to burst out of his skin if he didn't blurt it out. "I just- I don't... get it. What do you mean, I don't want you? I think I know what I want, Dave."
David sighs, shaking his head and giving Jack a desperate, pleading look. "I'm telling you, you don't want-"
"And I'm tellin' you, you don't know what I want or not," Jack cuts in. "And I want you. I want you, and everything you're willin' to give, do you understand?" He stares at David, who is silent, and refuses to meet Jack's eyes.
Jack takes a deep breath and reaches out, gently taking David's hand. David doesn't pull away, but he doesn't grab back. "Look, I... I don't care if you don't want this. That's fine, and we can forget I ever opened my big mouth, okay? But if you- if you're refusin' to give this a shot 'cause you don't think you're good enough... Dave, you can't possibly believe that."
David gulps, his gaze shifting frantically, and he looks like a deer in the headlights. The image makes Jack regret ever saying anything, but when Jack starts to pull his hand away, David stops him with a squeeze. "Do you-" He stops, clearing his throat and staring straight at the wooden table between them. "Do you know how hard it is for... for me to get out of bed every day?"
Jack stays silent. David takes a breath, and closes his eyes.
"It's- It's not that I don't want you, Jackie, 'cause I want you more than you'll ever know," He whispers. "But you... You deserve more than me, okay? You deserve someone who doesn't feel drained every day. Someone who can be... I don't know, happy, without having to try to be. I'm a mess, Jack. You don't want that."
"I don't want that for you," Jack murmurs, squeezing David's hand back. "David, we... we can wait 'til you feel better, or healed, or whatever the fuck it is, but regardless, I don't... I don't need you to change for me to love you, okay? You deserve that, just as you are."
David finally looks up, and gulps hard. "...Love?"
"Yeah. Love," Jack responds.
David's shoulders sink a little, and he nods slowly, his grip on Jack's hand tightening. "I'm broken," David mumbles. "And I-- I know that sounds dramatic, but I've never... I've never been good at this, and you know that. You've been there for all of my breakups."
"Yeah, I have," Jack nods, "and I know that you didn't deserve a damn one of 'em. David, you're a catch, and if people don't get that... That's their problem. Not yours." With a soft sigh, Jack looks down, then shifts in his seat and looks back up at David. "You don't have to make a decision now. We can talk this out when you want, 'kay? The ball's in your court, Dave, but... You ain't broken. I swear."
"Jack..."
"There's a difference between broken and bruised," Jack murmurs. "Okay? You... You might be goin' through a rough patch. You might be hurtin', and that fuckin' sucks, but that don't mean you're beyond repair. You said the same damn thing about me."
David gulps hard, then uses his free hand to rub his eyes. "I... I don't know if I'm ready for-... I'm sorry..."
Jack shakes his head. "You got nothin' to apologize for, okay? If you need to wait, we wait."
"I want to," David explains. "I-... I really, really want to try with you, I just..."
"It's okay," Jack whispers. "I promise."
"Promise," David whispers back.
They finish lunch. They go to the park, then to a bar. They table it for a month and a half before David takes the plunge and kisses Jack. A bruised heart just takes a little time, and Jack Kelly would wait an eternity and a half for David Jacobs.
GUYS!!! :)))) I got into my college’s very very prestigious, 4% acceptance rate Acting program!!!! I’m so so grateful. I literally have no words. I never like boasting about myself but after spending my entire life having to compete twice as hard as a disabled trans man in theatre, i’m gonna boast just a little :,) much much love to all of my other trans performers out there, we have a place onstage just like everyone else!!!!
I’m the same anon that sent you the song before, and I finished my Ralbert playlist :)
thoughts?
strawberry wine - Noah Kahan Dawning of Spring - Anson Seabra State of Grace (acoustic version) - Taylor Swift New Years Day - Taylor Swift Close Behind - Noah Kahan Be my Mistake - The 1975 Anyway - Noah Kahan John my Beloved - Sufjan Stevens
EEEEE OK WAIT ILL MAKE A RALBERT PLAYLIST WITH THOSE SONGS RNNNN TY ANON!!!!!!!!
Jack Kelly’s real name is Francis Sullivan, that’s just common knowledge. But that might not be the whole ordeal.
My dad is from Cork, Ireland and is semi-fluent in Gaelic. Today we were having a conversation about Irish names, and he said that his favorite name is “Proinnsias” (pronounced pron-chee-us) which is the Gaelic name for Francis. Considering that most newsies are first or second generation immigrants from Ireland, that means that Jack Kelly’s real name is Proinnsias Sullivan. But that’s not even the best part. Proinnsias in Gaelic means “little French man”. So Jack Kelly’s real name is really “Little French man Sullivan” and I can’t stop laughing about it.
Also, sorry for so many typos earlier, I had to leave for an acting class in like thirty seconds
jack who lives off shin ramen throughout uni x Davey who needs at least 2 full meals per day to function . they are roommates ...
" Honey with your kill-shot, baby."
i also have some javey fics in the works ... RAHH
the big question is do i post my one (1) newsies drawing. it's davey btw...
im australian and we call them boy mosquitos
Buttons, who loves cooking for the other Newsies but is extremely self-conscious about his skill and is shaking like a leaf every time they try out his food.
Elmer scarfing down his bowl: Holy shit, Buttons, this is really good!
Albert, already going back for seconds: Seriously, this is delicious.
Buttons, stood in the corner, practically hyperventilating with tears in his eyes: Oh, thanks fellas.
he/him media enjoyer • roman/rome • australian, 17 • javey&ralbert centric • always down for a chat !!
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