A Shower Scene Nobody Ever Asked For Or Wanted. Bucky Ur Mascara’s Runnin

If trench warfare were made-up, it would be the most on-the-nose anti-war satire ever created. Bunch of young men shooting at each other from inside open graves, slowly rotting even as they fight to stay alive. Every so often, they get to move a few hundred metres to dig a new grave for themselves somewhere else and this is called a victory.

That Captain America Healing Factor is all well and good until someone on the team has to pin Steve down and re-break his arm because they didn’t splint it in time and it healed wrong. Until they have to dig a knife into his face and pull out glass fragments that his skin healed over in five minutes flat. Until he has to have surgery wide awake because no anaesthetic works and the only other option is a leather belt between his teeth and useless platitudes like its going to be okay Steve, I promise, it’ll be over soon.

Agatha mentoring Billy is going to be like "Yeah I'm a super VILLAIN and you want to be a super HERO so I'm just going to teach you what I know and hopefully it translates over somehow. Anyway, lesson one: Always have a cloak or dress or something to flow behind you dramatically."

honestly steve deserved to be a little meaner in civil war

“steve you have to sign the accords”

“oh right i totally should sign my rights away to a government who i exposed to have been infiltrated by nazis for DECADES. i’m sure nothing bad will happen if i do that”

“i should let the government dictate my life when all i’ve ever done is save the world by going AGAINST the government. sounds like a great plan”

like t0ny stans love to say he was being horribly selfish and mean in civil war, which he… wasn’t, but i think he should have been

even just in the platonic sense the steve bucky dynamic has so untapped potential that marvel continuously lets go to waste by letting them say one line to each other per movie. srsly tho!!!! these bitches are early childhood friends. they legitimately know everything about each other. they’ve seen each other at high points low points what the fuck pal??? points, they know every embarrassing story by heart, they must have so many inside jokes, nothing is weird for them. they can be brutally horribly rudely honest with one another & get away with it. They fight , physically and verbally, and will knock sense into each other. or!! on the flip side they come up with the stupidest shit and get each other in trouble on purpose. the interactions are endless and unique and marvel is ridiculous to not make use of this. their default emotion/friendship setting is not pain!!!!

I don’t really like to post negative stuff, but like I really struggle to understand why people actually like Tony Stark.

Even discounting a lot of his shadier stuff, like selling weapons and essentially war profiteering which happens pre and during Iron Man 1, he does some pretty shady stuff. One of the things that still leaves a sour taste in my mouth is the whole Peter Parker thing in Civil War.

I wasn’t a Tony Anti when Civil War came out. In fact I actually liked him at the time, but the scene where Tony locks the door when he’s trying to recruit a 15 year old Peter really made me feel anxious, mostly because it mirrored a not so pleasant memory for me.

Also the fact that Tony uses Peter’s anxiety about telling aunt May about his powers to blackmail him into fighting team cap in Germany, and then essentially abandons him afterwards? Yeah that’s not good.

Tony was never a father figure to Peter, he simply used the kid like a tool against Steve and threw him away once the fight was done, because that’s how Tony has learned to treat people, like objects to be thrown away once he has no more use for them.

How did Clint and Caps relationship evolve from the "fuck you old man" mess it was in the early avengers

to understand their original dynamic, we’ll have to go back to clint’s childhood. first, clint’s father abused him, then orphaned him at age 8 by drunkenly crashing a car. strike 1 for father/authority figures.

his next father figure, the swordsman, acts as a mentor teaching him swordsmanship, knife-throwing, how to improve his aim, etc. clint looks up to him and practices hard to be part of the circus’ act, but discovers swordsman is stealing some of the show’s earnings, so swordsman tries to kill clint, breaking both of clint’s legs in the process, and leaves him for dead. strike 2.

older brother barney thinks clint wasted a good opportunity for them to work with the swordsman, so he leaves too. kind of a strike 3.

while clint heals, trickshot trains clint extensively until he thinks clint is finally ready to earn his keep. clint complies to try to make him happy. turns out trickshot was just prepping clint for more criminal activity, and he ends up shooting clint to a tree and leaving. strike 4.

by now, clint’s been abused, abandoned, or both by all of his father figures. he tried acting like a better son, brother, or mentee to please these figures in the hopes that they would act better towards him in return. clint now sees that it did nothing. by now he’s old enough and skilled enough to perform as a main act in the circus circuit, incidentally still being mostly run by criminals, so all authority figures are running together as “not to be trusted” at this point.

when clint joins the avengers, he’s thinking he’ll be part of a bona fide, revered team, as an equal member. instead, he finds out that all the founding members of the avengers are leaving, the other members are barely-reformed young villains (which he also is but that goes over his head), and a recently thawed captain america is being put in charge. as you might expect, he’s not thrilled.

now, everyone clearly sees cap’s put in charge because (1) he’s captain america (2) he’s led platoons (3) everyone else is like 19 and was a villain’s lackey like 1 week ago, and (4) he’s captain america. but clint sees: (1) some dude thinks he’s the boss of me! (2) i don’t need some dude to be the boss of me!! (3) it never goes well when some dude is the boss of me!!! (4) bosses don’t last long anyways, so i should be the boss of me and everyone else!!!!

even though cap demonstrates effective leadership, clint’s just waiting for the other shoe to drop. he trains with cap begrudgingly, because his last trainers had ulterior motives. with every instruction from cap, clint lets any possible objection he could have be known. if he can’t think of one, then he’ll just insult cap for being old. he completely resents cap’s authority over him.

but the other shoe never does drop. steve, being recently thawed and going through his own issues, left the team for a short period. clint thinks “a-ha! i knew he would abandon us!” but cap quickly returns. and unlike his other father figures, cap repeatedly shows genuine support, belief in clint, and concern for his well-being. as cap’s actions prove time and time again that he’s different, clint starts to warm to him; but still throws some insults to show that he’s ready to disobey an order at any moment. the insults become more half-hearted.

by the time hank pym comes back to the team, clint was regularly training with cap– and actually enjoying himself.

naturally, his defense mechanisms mean he’s still a little combative…

but over time, clint’s jeering shifts to friendly teasing. he always lets his objections be known and still argues often, but for things he has actual reasons for and no longer just because. soon enough, clint practically idolizes cap. everyone knows this because it’s completely transparent.

and so, cap will always have a soft spot for clint 

and clint will always call him old. and they will insult each other, forever

战后生活

imagine if the avengers had actually discussed the plan for more than an hour, and found out from nebula that you have to sacrifice what you love most to get the soul stone (basically a soul for a soul), and steve volunteered himself for the mission. face to face with the red skull, he’s asked if he’s willing to make the sacrifice, to lose what’s important to him. steve replies, “go ahead and try. i’ve already lost everything else.” after its done, steve just laughs and says, “that’s all?”

& steve makes it back alive with the stone. he makes it back to the avengers compound. they don’t recognize him at first, but once they see past the change in structure and size, its obvious. they ask what happened, and he replies “a soul for a soul”. he gave up captain america, let him go once and for all, and that was enough.  

Some Avengers headcanons

Scarlet Witch is Cassie Lang’s second favorite Avenger. (Scott, obviously, is first.) That’s why Scott makes a point of saying “I know you, you’re great too!” to her in civil war, and why he later starts learning magic tricks for Cassie.

Bucky has named every single goat he tends to after people he knows. The most reckless one is named Steve. The one that constantly tries to headbutt him is Sam.

Shuri has an extensive database of memes about life in the palace. Her brother and Okoye are the only ones who currently have access.

Peter occasionally doodles spider suit designs on the margins of his homework without thinking about it, and then has to tear them off before handing it in. His teachers are still under the impression that he has a homework-hungry dog.

Clint has purchased each of his children a bow and arrow set for their tenth birthday. He already has one picked out for Nathaniel.

Sam has a special charging station for Redwing set up right beside his bed. He occasionally has Redwing fetch him water or turn of the light so he doesn’t have to get up.

Natasha has a bad habit of borrowing other people’s stuff without asking. Especially sweatshirts and jackets. If it’s kept where she can access it, it’s fair game. If you borrow her jacket without asking, however, expect a big fuss.

Wanda has a lingering habit that she got from growing up poor, homeless, and hungry - she stockpiles food. She hides it away in her room without really thinking about it, and the others occasionally have to go through and bring it all back to the kitchen so they don’t get ants.

Vision tries to avoid the internet, especially after what happened to Ultron. He thinks it brings out the worst in people, and doesn’t quite trust himself to be unaffected.

Steve has always debated getting a pet, but after losing his whole world he’s a little hesitant to let himself love something that he knows only has a lifespan of ten years.

On occasion, T'Challa will intentionally misquote vines to annoy his sister.

When Bruce gets nightmares, he watches obscure crafting and decorating videos on YouTube to calm himself back to sleep. Hearing the generic video background music has him yawning like a charm.

Thor always stocks up on Midgardian food before heading back to Asgard. Lucky Charms is his current favorite.

Peter likes trying to do things upside down just to see how different it is. He’s very familiar with having to explain to Aunt May how pouring himself a drink wound up with orange juice all over the kitchen.

The first thing Aunt May does once she discovers that Peter is Spiderman is examine the suit - she removes the tracker the second she finds it. This is why Peter surprises everyone when he shows up in Infinity War.

Scott has a ranking system from 1 to 10 on how enjoyable each of Cassie’s kid shows are for adults. That way he knows which ones he’s going to need his phone as distraction to sit through.

Lila Barton is the only known person in the world who has gotten away with putting a pink bow in Natasha’s hair.

Nick Fury keeps a couple dozen bottles of aspirin in his desk - one for each of the Avengers, labeled with their name - and he’ll pull from a specific person’s bottle whenever they are giving him a headache. One of the ways he judges performance is by seeing how fast it takes him to go through that person’s bottle.