Cop Shows Are Like "dammit! We Would Have Caught Babyeater Mike By Now If People Didn't Have Rights,"

What we know about Goncharov so far:

PRODUCED by Scorsese, but DIRECTED by Matteo JWHJ 0715, get it right.

Robert De Niro, Al Pacino star, along with Cybill Shepherd. Released in 1973.

About Soviets in Naples dealing with the mob. Greatest mafia movie ever made, natch.

Ice Pick Joe is under rated.

Homoeroticism between Goncharov and Andrey is extremely popular in the modern day, bordering on explicit text and desire even through their rivalry and sublimated competing for Katya.

Katya is underused in the movie, and is a complicated character who is both the femme fatale, the center of a love triangle between Goncharov and Andrey, Goncharov’s wife, and also manipulating everyone.

There’s also a scene where Katya kisses Sofia? Tumblr lesbians go crazy.

Had political undertones and commentary, possibly about the failures of the Soviet Union, or leftist ideology vs. realpolitik.

Is over three hours long and kinda slow at times. Violent. Not as easy to watch as the memes and shipping would have you believe.

However conversely film bros who reduce to a badass gangster movie are missing so so much.

Has clock symbolism. Themes of how the characters are trapped in cycles of violence, revenge, hubris, tragedy. Lots of Catholic imagery.

Snubbed at awards, lack of official releases has turned it into a bit of lost media, despite how influential it was.

There have been talks of sequels/remakes through the years but nothing has ever come of it.

I think the thing that drives me the most batshit about the medical fatphobia conversation is that the burden of proof feels so exactly backwards. Just from an obvious best practices standpoint???

Things like intentional malnourishment, intentionally incapacitating vital organs through surgery, denial of potentially lifesaving medical care until those things are done, etc.

Those are all pretty extreme. The kinds of things it feels like a “first do no harm” system should have a lot of solid evidence for before recommending or implementing them.

But they’re so bog standard and accepted and everyone from doctors to your own family will look at you like you’re a flat-earther when you suggest maybe we shouldn’t be defaulting to that.

I just want to say I have absolutely 0 sympathy whatsoever for anyone complaining about anything homeless people do. oh you saw human shit on the ground?? hmm maybe it's because THEY DONT HAVE A TOILET. oh you saw someone cleaning themselves in a public restroom? maybe because THEY DONT HAVE A FUCKING SHOWER. oh no a homeless person is living in a tent and you think it's ugly?? CRY ABOUT IT IN YOUR FUCKING HOUSE. oh my goodness homeless people sleeping on the ground and they're in your way!!!! yeah THEY DONT HAVE A BED

if seeing homeless people bothers you that much then good news! you have some choices! 1) let them all live with you in your house! 2) start pressuring your local government to stop criminalizing the homeless and start giving them financial and medical assistance! 3) shut the fuck up and die!

listen, I- I cant help but think every time i see will and eddie interact in fics, that will would not have liked eddie like

at all

Eddie? is a dick.

and like maybe this is me just being insane, but i think will's love of Dnd comes from an actual love and appreciation for character and story and a love of his friends and his community he found playing dnd. It gave him an outlet, it let him express himself, it let him be brave and when you see him trying so hard to come back to that in season 3, you see he uses it as a way to express what he's going through. But most importantly, Will plays dnd because he loves his friends.

eddie is so rigid with his dnd obsession. He uses it as a way to control things, to (honesty) control people. He uses it to build himself a throne. A LITERAL THRONE SITS AT THE HEAD OF THE HELLFIRE TABLE. The party always played at a square table, they all looked at each other, all equal, all on the same playing field. But eddie, he's different. Even at lunch you see him sit at the head of the table. He gets up and walks across them, he shouts, he draws attention to them, invites the tormenting almost, and i don't think will would have liked the way Eddie was constantly bringing attention to himself and, in turn, hellfire as a whole. Eddie uses dnd to antagonize, to start shit, as a marker of his "fuck it" attitude

Will would not have felt safe in hellfire. Eddie's "forced conformity is killing the kids" monologue is such bullshit. Hellfire would have suffocated will. Not because i think will couldn't stand up for himself or hold his own against Eddie, but Dustin and Mike are so enamored with Eddie, they fall in line and worship the guy, so much so that they are willing to ditch Lucas and his game! Will never would have stood for that. Will would have been at Lucas's game. No DnD party is worth it to him if its not with his party

"But, what if you wanna join another party?"

"Not possible"

Are we all just, collectively forgetting this? Like are we just blacking out here? Now yes, this is very byler, but its not just about Mike. Its about Lucas and Dustin too. Its about El, and now Max. Its about his people.

Eddie actively tore apart the party under the guise of being "dedicated to dnd" but the only thing eddie is dedicated to is himself and serving his best interest. At least he was in hellfire.

and yeah, idk, i feel like this is an unpopular opinion, but these are just my thoughts. feel free to share yours.

People can't understand why Will freezes in s4 when watching El get bullied cuz the show never cuts to Will's trauma as its happening, but they understand crystal clear why El freezes up after hitting Angela cuz the show splices her Brenner trauma in between Mike's accusatory tone being thrown at her.

They're so quick to forget that Will was kidnapped and possessed so he's probably gonna go into shock when faced with bullies who trigger that freeze response. And it's only cuz the show doesn't remind us with flashbacks that Will went and is still going through it. But El's trauma gets visually addressed all the time compared to Will and she's not seen as a crybaby when she's triggered.

We still don't know what Will had to do in s1 to survive for a week in the UD cuz it's never visually shown like how El meets One and how she was othered even in the lab by the other kids. All of Will's trauma besides s2 possession is implicitly offscreen/word of mouth while El's is explicitly expressed onscreen. People sympathized with Will in s2 cuz they saw his pain blatantly, but once s3/4 happened, amnesia hit cuz Will isn't fighting for his life as hard anymore so his reactions are viewed as childish/annoying instead of after effects of being targeted twice.

Compared to El; GA sees her witness bad men kill the 1st person to help her, see her remember she has a sister in Kali and that her mother tried to save her from the rainbow room once, see El feel horrible that Hopper's "dead" and wonder if she killed those kids in s4. We never got to see Will's reaction to finding out Bob died, which was a father figure to him too like Hopper to El. We never see Will's reaction to being a pawn in killing those soldiers.

For s5 I'm glad it's Will-centric cuz last time in s2 when Will was the focus, people cared for him and understood he was a boy who needed comfort.

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i think i hear a fly coming. ill use my nasty tongue to glomp it out of the air

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It's either "I must do this thing RIGHT NOW or I'm going to lose it" or "the stars and planets aren't in perfect positions so it'll happen when that happens" and nothing in between.

god is a 24 year old porn bot

So there’s a trend that I absolutely hate in online discussions of (non-satirical) genre, particularly genre that’s influenced by the gothic. This trend makes my eyes roll back in my head until I can see through my own skull. It makes me want to bite a car in half. It makes me want to step into the jellyfish tank at the New York Aquarium and beg for the sweet sweet annihilation of a thousand stings. 

I call this trend: Oh Just Be Sensible, and it goes like this:

“Why do vampires always end up covered in blood when they feed, I don’t spill soup all down the front of my shirt when I eat dinner. Real toddler energy.”

“Why do people always cut their hands to swear oaths, everyone knows it would hurt way less on the [insert body part with fewer nerve endings]”

“Vampires shouldn’t be feeding from people’s wrists, it damages the tendons, if doctors don’t take your blood from your wrist, vampires shouldn’t either! No one will be able to flex their fingers the next day.”

(This comes up a lot with vampires, I mention, as I stride purposefully into the glistening mass of jellyfish.)

There are direct answers for some of these when it comes to the practical visual language of a particular medium (for example, you cut your hand on stage / on set because you can hold a blood pack in there, and even if you don’t have an effect, the gesture and its purpose can be discerned from the nosebleeds) but what really gets me is how thematically boneheaded this sort of observation is. 

Like, let’s go down the list here. 

Why do vampires end up covered in their victims’ blood? Well Scoob, do you think it could maybe have something to do with their bestial, inhuman nature? Or with the erotic and sensual abandon with which they can approach violence, now that they’re untethered from human morals? 

Why do people cut their hands to swear oaths? Aside from what I mentioned above, do you think maybe it’s because it adds a layer of gravity to see two people swearing an oath to one another with blood dripping from their clasped hands? Do you think it’s maybe to evoke a unity of body, something greater and more primal than a unity of word? Or maybe to remind us of the dire consequences of breaking a blood oath?

Why are authors having vampires feed from people’s wrists if it damages their tendons? Damn, maybe that’s because it’s where the pulse is. You know, the pulse? The heartblood, the thing that races when you’re scared or turned on or both? The thing that stutters when you’re close to death and could, should the author choose, ring in the vampire’s ears like a chime or a great pounding thunderclap. Maybe in a story about undead beings who drink blood, we can sacrifice a bit of sensible reality in order to enforce the emotion and thematic heft of a scene? 

Images like these communicate what is happening between two characters, not just the events that are transpiring! No one making stories forgot to consider ~sensible~ little observations, because it would be absolutely inane to consider an observation with the creative value of a wet paper towel. This stuff is part of our visual language for a reason! Themes also need to be communicated! 

God, like, okay, I’m exhausted and the aquarium staff keeps yelling at me when they find me here, but let me just wrap up by saying that relationships, character and meaning are expressed in so many ways beyond dialogue or internal monologue, and those expressions are so rarely sensible. 

(Also all this shit looks cool as hell, do you really want your protagonists swearing to die for one another by dabbing their slightly bleeding elbows together, grow up.)