Reblog This To Pet Me

"I ate my twin in the womb" big deal, I ate my twin last year.

"my son turned out fine"

Ma'am, your son is humping my boot while I forcefeed her estrogen.

This is the back panel for the first vest! I've never actually tried to make a vest before so I'm really excited to reblog with more stuff :)

I based this off of a poem I saw while scrolling Pinterest, and I couldn't find any credit. Idk if that means op wrote it or they just didn't credit the person who did, but if you do know who wrote it, let me know!

You’re not depressed. You just need $250,000 in your bank account.

I cannot stress to you enough how much I need to be a prize. Am I being clear. You can rape me, snuff me, beat me. Hypnotize me, brainwash me, mindwipe me, anything. But it needs to be special. You need to feel proud of it, because it was me. There has to be something you like about me. Maybe you think I'm hot. Maybe you like my writing, or think I'm kind, or smart. And whatever you do has to be claiming ownership of that. Maybe you ruin my looks for everyone but yourself. Maybe you keep me away from everyone, so my kindness is just for you. But no matter what it is, it has to be made special for you. Because its me.

You ever hear that old chestnut about how most people neglect the part of the story of Icarus where he also had to avoid flying too low, lest the spray of the sea soak his feathers and cause him to fall and drown? You ever think about how different the world would be if Icarus died that way instead? If the idiom was to Fly To Close To The Sea? A warning against playing it far too safe, about not stretching your wings and soaring properly? You ever think about how Icarus died because he was happy?