Made-of-hybris - El

Shortest dissertation ever: you just don’t do missions.

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(Source)

i was at a haunted hayride tonight and a guy dressed up as an undead cowboy approached me and got in my face and called me "prettyboy" and then he walked away to scare other ppl and then he came back looking for me and said "wheres my prettyboy" and then he found me and said "ah there he is" and got in my face again and i. was so high all night and that was so crazy. bro how are u going to get in my face and taunt me in a cowboy hat and call me prettyboy. how am i supposed to exist now.

actual facts about Vergil, according to Suetonius:

he was dark skinned (”aquilo colore”; of dark color)

he was very tall and had a “rustic face” (whatever that means)

my poor boy had a terrible health and he suffered from headaches and stomach problems

he really, really liked boys (”libidinis in pueros pronioris”, “he was given to passions for boys” like me too son) and his faves were Cebes and Alexander, whom he calls Alexis in his second Bucolic

he was very socially awkward. once he became famous for his Bucolics, he hated going to Rome and if he absolutely had to, he “would take refuge in the nearest house, to avoid those who followed and pointed him out”

he worked as a lawyer only once and apparently he was terrible giving speeches, bless him

he had a very soft and beautiful voice, and he would get really excited while reading his poems. according to Suetonius, he was once reading the Aeneid (not yet finished) to Augustus and Octavia, and she was so affected by it that she fainted

“We both know I could rip you to shreds and do my nails at the same time.”

(by positanolife75)

Hades : My entire life is just a test to see if i’ll commit suicide or homicide first

Hades: Way to go, Zeus. The bar was set pretty low, but you found a shovel and tunneled underneath it.

Boy, I felt that one