This Made Me Chuckle, But I Must Wail And Bemoan The Missed Alliteration Opportunity. Could Have Went

hands

my biggest hope for the new Devil May Cry anime is that it doesn't lose what makes DMC so cool, which is the sheer brazen uncoolness of its characters.

Dante is a middle-aged man who is semi-unemployed and constantly late on rent because his shop is in the middle of nowhere and nobody knows what he does. every time he gets a job he destroys two houses because he can't help showing off to absolutely no one. he loves his mom, pizza, and strawberry sundaes. he doesn't smoke. he doesn't drink. he doesn't curse. his place of business is decorated with posters of scantily-clad women but as far as we're aware, he has never had sex.

Vergil is Dante's older twin by a couple hours whose superiority complex originates in how he's Dante's older twin by a couple hours. he spent his childhood reading William Blake poetry but doesn't understand it. he runs around with just a katana because he considers guns to be "cowardly." he has only had sex once in his entire life. this resulted in him becoming a deadbeat dad, but not even the archetypical "cool" kind because he is somehow convinced that Nero is Dante's kid. we have actual in-canon confirmation that if he wasn't part demon, he would be a melodramatic pretentious poetry-obsessed twink. Vergil abandons his pursuit of power not jusf for the sake of Nero but because Nero is his power realized - his legacy - the ability to protect loved ones without killing them. he loves Nero but will never under any circumstances admit it because he has the emotional maturity of a 12-year-old. instead he throws a journal of William Blake poems at him and jumps off a cliff.

compared to the rest of his living family, Nero is thriving. he has a job, a house, a wife, and several foster kids. when a suspicious hobo shows up on his doorstep he invites him in for dinner. he thinks Dante is his dad. Dante knows Nero is his brother's kid because he has never had sex. Nero is viewed by Dante as an incompetent child who needs guidance and protection despite Nero being a grown adult and being more mature than Dante and Vergil in every way and yet neither of them will ever acknowledge this. when Nero hears about Dante and Vergil's battle-to-the-death rivalry he decides it's stupid and shoves them apart like they're two kids in a playground brawl. he's the dad now. fuck you.

Thinking about a self conscious Nanami Kento following the Shibuya incident he made it out alive okay, good men don't perish in this house

pairing: nanami kento x f!reader cw: body image issues, angst, hurt/comfort

Nanami looks at himself in the mirror and studies his disfigured flesh with thinly veiled disdain. His stomach churns as his gaze follows the ugly, reddish grooves that twist and mar half of his face. The macabre view of his teeth as a result of the tearing to his right lip is no pretty sight either. Nanami certainly never believed himself to be an exceptionally handsome man before all this...but now...

He finds it difficult to face you, knowing that every time the two of you go out in public together, people stare. Of course, you've reassured Nanami countless times that it doesn't bother you in the slightest and that he shouldn't be ashamed, but being the conscientious man that he is, Nanami can't help but worry that he's becoming a burden to you.

The whispers of the people that pass you by certainly don't ease those anxieties in the slightest.

"What happened to his face?"

"Look, he's wearing an eye patch. How weird."

"Why's a cutie like her hanging out with that ugly mug?"

"You can see his teeth! Gross!"

"She must be a gold digger. No way anyone would willingly date someone who looks like that."

Each of those callous remarks, especially those that question your character, feel like a ruthless punch to the gut. You furiously defend him of course--everything short of spitting venom at the people who've uttered such cruel words--but Nanami knows that he's dragging you down. He knows that he's selfishly ostracizing you from the rest of society by staying by your side. He knows it's not fair to you. It isn't right to subjugate you to all this...

If he were a better man, Nanami would have cut ties with you long ago.

"Kento..."

He feels your arms wrap around his waist from behind. You've caught him staring in the mirror again, and at three in the morning no less. Nanami can't help but feel utterly ashamed.

"I'm sorry, love. Did I wake you?"

He feels you shake your head back and forth against his back, the warmth of your body, so recently bundled up beneath the covers, seeps through his t-shirt. It's calming, just like your touch.

"Do you mind turning around for me?"

Incapable of ever denying you, Nanami does as you wish. He turns to face you, too tired to try and hide his melancholic expression (not that you wouldn't have seen through his thinly veiled facade anyway). Your own expression doesn't waver as you look at him. In your eyes Nanami sees neither disgust nor pity nor anger. Instead Nanami sees what he always sees--love.

"I love you," You say, as if it were the most matter of fact thing in the world. "Every day when I wake up in the morning and see your sleeping face next to mine, I feel so incredibly grateful that I can hardly breathe."

Your hands rise up, reaching forward to gently cup Nanami's face. He winces slightly at your touch, his scared tissue is still sensitive, but he doesn't pull away. He doesn't think he ever could.

"Kento, I know that adjusting to these scars--both the ones on the surface and the ones inside--hasn't been easy. I know that there will be bad days,"

Your thumbs tenderly caress Nanami's cheek, tracing the bones that now protrude there thanks to the weight he'd lost. He realizes that he should be feeling self-conscious right now, with how close you are to the ugly parts of him, but he doesn't. Not when you're looking at him like he'd just hung the moon and stars.

"Nanami Kento, you are stuck with me. I'm going to stand by you, through the good and the bad. Through all of it. That's what people who love each other do."

You smile at him and Nanami's chest tightens to the point of pain, breath catching harshly in his throat as his vision begins to swim. It comes crashing down in waves, all the doubt and all the pain he'd held inside. He can't hold himself up anymore and Nanami slumps against you, burying his face into your shoulder as he lets the tears silently flow.

And like always, you hold him.

H. T.

The Tea Witch ☕️✨

Nero decided it was high time he started asking the real questions.

Starlight

Rating: G Summary: A short story about a woman searching for the person who abandoned her long ago. cw: family angst, child abandonment wc: 1.3k

Estelle held her breath, stilling completely before she took her first step onto the lifeless planet. In her suspended silence, she could distinctly feel the resounding shudder of gravity pull her forward, beckoning her to venture forth into a strange, new world.

“ You have arrived on EX 6G12 .” Computer’s voice crackled in her earpiece. “Atmosphere composition, 97% carbon dioxide and 3% nitrogen. Conclusion, unsustainable for human life. Please be advised that your current oxygen reserves sit at 73% .”

Estelle released her held breath, fogging up the glass dome surrounding her head as she lowered herself down from the shuttle. It was silly to think that something as seemingly fragile as a glass fishbowl was the only thing separating her from certain death. 

“Acknowledged. Thank you.”

The moment Estelle’s boot came into contact with the surface of the planet, a cloud of bright red dust scattered about her legs. Estelle paused, momentarily enchanted as she watched the disturbed particles flickering like a thousand tiny stars, curiously dancing in the light beaming off her helmet.

Computer, like always, took note of Estelle’s interest and fuelled her boundless wonder.

“Every 112 years, this planet’s orbit brings it within close proximity of a star, HR 17C3. According to my data logs, this increases the planet’s temperature to 1278 degrees Celsius. Glass storms typically form as a result of the winds and fluctuating temperatures of the planet’s day and night cycles.”

A glass storm. Estelle couldn’t imagine anything as simultaneously captivating as it was terrifying. Thank goodness her timing had brought her to this planet before it had left its tranquil phase. Otherwise, she’d have had no hope of finding the person she was looking for. 

“Computer, how far is he?”

Estelle turned and used her light to survey the pitch black space that surrounded her. She couldn’t see anything on the dark horizon. No rocks, no shadows, no lights. No sign of any life whatsoever. Nothing but red dust and glimmering glass.

“Acquiring signal. Calculating. Estimated distance to target: 3 kilometres, southwest.”

Southwest. 

A strange sense of deja vu befell her. Southwest; the same direction she’d taken on that night many years ago. With vivid clarity Estelle remembered the way her chilled fingers felt combing through the cooled foliage of her grandparent’s cornfield as she searched for the strange light she had seen glowing in the distance from her bedroom window. She’d ventured forth that night, armed with nothing but a flashlight and her childish curiosity.

Stupid was certainly one word for what she’d been back then, but yet here she was again, searching for that same light; except this time she was millions of miles away from that quaint little cornfield. 

“Signal lost.” Computer abruptly deadpanned in her ear and Estelle's heart nearly stopped.

“What? What do you mean you lost his–”

“Signal found,” Computer interrupted. “But it is fading. The target’s estimated power reserves have depleted to 4.3% of max capacity.”

The rest of Computer’s words fell on deaf ears as Estelle quickly made a grab for her lazer rifle and tore into the darkness of the unknown. God, she was shaking, but she held fast to that rifle, clutching it to her chest like a lifeline. She’d never ventured this far from her system before, and she was scared of what lay beyond the light of her shuttle, but there was no way she was turning back now, not after everything she’d been through in her search to find him.

Estelle's hurried footsteps were surprisingly silent, the red sand and thick darkness easily swallowing up whatever sound she made, making her feel that much more vulnerable and alone. It was eerie, like the inside of a coffin buried hundreds of meters down.

How fitting that she would find him in a place like this. After all that time he spent shut away from her during her childhood...after all that time she spent believing that he was dead.

“I’m sorry Starlight. But this work is very important. It will help people. It will save the world.”

Estelle’s molars gnaw on the inside of her cheek—a nasty habit she’d acquired in her youth. To save the world. It was a noble pursuit, her grandparents always told her, and she knew that painfully well even back then. 

But…despite that man’s sacrifice, Estelle couldn’t help but feel that she was the one who paid the price. In the name of the greater good, Estelle lost the only person in the world she longed for the most. It didn't feel fair that she was made to sacrifice the one person who was supposed to love her above all else. All for a rotting blue planet filled with selfish people who cared nothing but themselves.

But then again, Estelle knew deep down that she was no different from them. After all, she had walked away from it all and abandoned those people just like he'd abandoned her.

“Approaching target.”

Estelle’s focus recentered on the vastness before her. Her eyes darted about the darkness, desperately hoping to find any sign of him, until there, far in the distance she saw something.

Levitating just above the ground Estelle saw two glowing orange lights. She'd recognize that warm glow anywhere.

Gasping out a sob she didn’t even know she was holding, Estelle ran for that faint ray of hope. With each step forward, her vision grew progressively more blurry and the lights flickered with each desperate gasp that exploded from her lungs. In the back of her mind, Estelle prayed that the flicker was just a trick of her welling tears.

Please. Don't disappear, not now. Not after I’ve finally found you.

And then, Estelle finally reached him. Her headlight sharply reflected against the metallic face of the one she had been searching for for so long. He lay there, immobilized on his front, his rusted body covered in windswept dust. His glowing eyes immediately landed on Estelle’s face, softening in spite of the emotive shortcomings of his robotic face.

“S-s-starrlight?”

The sound of his artificial voice vibrated through the empty darkness. It was so bittersweet, an imperfect replica of the man who Estelle could no longer vividly remember, such was the cruel march of time.

“Yes, It’s me.”

Estelle dropped her rifle and fell to her knees in front of the massive, mechanical man. She no longer fought back her stinging tears as she brushed the years of rusted dirt off of his dented and scratched face.

She heard the gentle whir of his optics as they travelled up and down her body. She must look so different to him now, being almost 20 years since he'd seen her last.

“I would have never imagined th-th-that…”

His voice cut off momentarily and a static sound reminiscent of grinding of sand filled the darkened night. Estelle wondered how long he’d been out here, eroding away in this state. 10 years? Perhaps even longer. 

“L-look how b-big you’ve gotten! Oh, Estelle. I’m s-sorry I didn’t get to watch you grow up. I’m sorry I wasn’t there to protect you. I-I-I’m so sorry.”

And when she heard those words, Estelle wept openly for the first time in years. Wailing and howling like a little child, she instinctively brought her trembling hands to her face, but quickly realized that the dome protecting her head prevented her from masking her pain. She had to show him; reveal her anguish in its full, ugly glory.

“It’s okay, it’s okay. Don’t c-c-cry ” His robotic voice echoed through the empty plain. Its tilt was artificial, but the regret in his words was as alive and organic as she was. 

“I-I’m trying.” Estelle gasped, her own voice raw and broken. “I’m trying dad, but I can’t seem to stop.”

A heavy mechanical groan thundered and snapped Estelle’s attention forward. She watched, and her heart fell to her stomach as her father’s vessel fought with all his might to lift his hand and reach out to her. 

But he couldn’t…despite her finally being close enough to touch, he couldn’t reach her. 

“Es-s-s-telle.”

The cosmic irony was not lost on her.

He’d named her after a star after all. 

Something something when your dragon boyfriend sheds his immortal state to save you from an evil scroll