Keep Trying Things. You’ll Know What “works” Because It Will Just Come Together Seamlessly.

What’s the purpose of worrying when God always works things out for me

Any advice for how to deal with people being entitled to know your business? I'm often accused of being guarded and standoffish when really I'm just setting up boundaries. For example, I've been working towards an advanced degree for 3 years now. I have a well thought out, elaborate plan to achieve my goals. This is my business but people still get upset when they look at my life and say "you're not doing anything with your life". To them it looks like I just go to work and travel.

I say that I'm working towards something. But this never shuts them up. Then the questions "Well what is it?! What are you doing?! Do you have a plan?! Have you applied to school yet?! Have you thought about this, this, this and this?!!" They always word the questions like I'm incompetent and lack foresight. I always feel cornered when this happens, like my agency has been taken away. I usually just end up explaining my long, drawn out plan to them and I feel ran over afterwards. I've had people literally get mad and lash out when I keep details to myself. "What's with the attitude? I'm just asking a question, you don't need to give me an attitude." So it's easier to just give in.

"This is my business but people still get upset when they look at my life and say "you're not doing anything with your life". To them it looks like I just go to work and travel."

Why not just let them be upset? 70% of people who knew me in the past still think I'm broke and not doing anything with my life and I just go along with it. Let them create their own thoughts and ideas and tell them that they're absolutely right. At the end of the day what they think about you just isn't your business.

"I say that I'm working towards something. But this never shuts them up."

Unless they are someone important that you might need to use in the future, it's totally unnecessary to let them know anything at all.

"They always word the questions like I'm incompetent and lack foresight. I always feel cornered when this happens, like my agency has been taken away."

Because it is taken away. Corner them instead, let them know you're living on autopilot with no current ambitions. Like I said if they are no one important to you WHO CARES???

"So it's easier to just give in."

It's actually much much easier to let them think what they want... don't let yourself feel pressured and cave in. You can literally make up any lie and say that your focused on becoming a yoga teacher or something.... anythingggggg.

Stop giving your time and attention to things that are stealing you from your life. Stop vicariously living through others and calling it inspiration. Stop idolizing random people on the internet to a point you spend hours defending them knowing they have no idea you exist and they'll make bank anyway Stop playing PR for celebrities and your gurus Stop identifying yourself with a random ideology / political stance / set of beliefs so hard that an enemy to it is an enemy to you and whoever buys into it is a God Stop seeking instant connections and calling random people you just met bestie Stop arguing with people knowing full well your 20790880 word virtue signalling will not change their mind just give you props for status seeking Stop trying to change people that have not asked for your help Stop making excuses for them Stop denying yourself the pleasures you've worked so hard to enjoy Stop measuring your worth against external opinion Stop trying to do everything at once Stop trying to coach people into being decent towards you and others Stop thinking you're the exception of the rule Stop that magical thinking bs that disempowers you Stop watching those videos that you know you won't really actualize Stop mindlessly consuming content Stop that black and white thinking Stop valuing passion over mastery Stop with the self help books and gurus Stop with the excuses just. Stop floating across your achievements like you didn't pray for them seeking the next Stop picking sides on random stuff Stop that hero worship thing Stop buying into that feel good bs Stop listening to music that is insulting to you stop reading the comments knowing they'll annoy you stop going back to people that have shown you they do not care for you stop trying to defend yourself against people that have already decided you're guilty stop defending your tastes and preferences to people that just don't get it Stop Stop just. Stop

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Could you please make a post on how to stay fresh and put together through out the day? I always feel and look good for a while after i leave the house but the wind and weather and moving around makes me feel like a mess after a few hours and i come home looking nothing like when i left. What is your routine to maintain the way you look throughout the day?

Thanks so much💗

Hey Anon! I'm just gonna make a big list :)

Smelling amazing is the hallmark of presenting well, so I always moisturize my skin very well, apply a thin layer of perfume oil on my scent points, and douse myself in my perfume of the day. I'll also bring a travel size for touch-ups every few hours.

I keep a tin of sugar-free mints in my purse so my breath is always smelling super fresh.

I always have a small comb and brush in my purse so I can run to the bathroom and fix my hair. I also use hairspray like it's going out of style to make sure my hairstyle is maintained throughout the day.

I keep a tiny compact mirror and take a quick look at myself every hour or so to see what needs tweaking.

I've perfected my priming and setting routine to make sure my makeup stays perfectly in place for at least 12 hours.

I keep a Tide pen on me at all times.

I choose wrinkle-resistant fabrics that travel well and don't require constant ironing.

If it's windy out I'll pin my hair down while commuting to prevent flyaways

I ALWAYS have a fresh layer of lipgloss on, even if I'm not wearing any makeup.

I'm notorious for asking my friends if my hair or makeup needs fixing up.

Hi Elle,

Did you take any etiquette classes, or red any books about etiquette? If so what did you take away from it? In general what is some basic etiquette everyone should know?

Yes, my mother made my sister and me take etiquette classes when we were growing up, where we learned how to make small talk, use cutlery properly, do the fox trot, and all that. It felt like torture at the time, but now that I'm an adult, I'm incredibly grateful for it. There are countless teachings I believe everyone should know, but I'll keep it simple and list the basics:

Socializing:

Greetings and Introductions:

Initiate Greetings: In formal settings, greeting the host and senior individuals first is polite.

Introduce Yourself with Confidence: When introducing yourself, make eye contact, smile, and offer a firm (but gentle) handshake.

Remember Names: Pay attention to names during introductions, and try to use them in conversation to show attentiveness.

Conversation Etiquette:

Avoid Monopolizing Conversations: Engage in a balanced dialogue exchange; avoid dominating the conversation.

Graceful Interruptions: If you must interrupt, do so politely with a soft “Excuse me” or “May I add…?”

Ending Conversations: Close conversations gracefully, e.g., “It was a pleasure speaking with you,” before moving on to another guest.

Small Talk and Topics:

Safe Topics: Stick to light, neutral topics like travel, the arts, or current (non-controversial) events.

Avoid Over-sharing: Keep personal matters private; maintain an air of mystery and sophistication.

Dining:

Seating Etiquette:

Wait to Be Seated: Wait until the host signals to sit, or until you’re guided to your seat.

Seating Order: If you’re hosting, guide guests to their seats based on seniority or guest of honor status.

Table Manners:

Utensil Use: Start with the outermost utensils and work your way in as the courses progress. After you've cut your food, make sure you move your for to your left hand even if it feels counterintuitive,

Bread and Butter: Tear off a small piece of bread, butter it on your plate, and eat it, rather than buttering the entire slice.

Resting Utensils: When pausing, place utensils on the plate in a “resting” position, such as crossed or angled.

Handling Courses:

Soup Etiquette: Spoon soup away from you and sip from the edge of the spoon without slurping.

Pacing: Match your pace to the host or the most senior individual at the table. Don't rush or lag behind.

Events:

RSVP and Invitations:

Timely Response: Respond to invitations promptly and never bring uninvited guests unless explicitly allowed.

Respect Time: Arrive on time, especially for formal events, but not more than 15 minutes early.

Host and Guest Responsibilities:

Host Etiquette: As a host, introduce guests to each other, especially if they don’t know anyone else.

Guest Behavior: Engage with other guests, but don’t cling to one person for the entire event. Mingle politely.

Handling Alcohol:

Moderation: Drink alcohol in moderation. Know your limits and avoid overindulgence.

Toast Etiquette: Stand if a toast is being made in your honor, and wait to drink until after the toast is given.

Dressing:

Dress Code Adherence:

Understand the Code: Whether it’s black tie, cocktail, or casual, always adhere strictly to the dress code specified on the invitation.

Subtle Elegance: Opt for classic, understated pieces that are elegant but not overly flashy.

Grooming and Accessories:

Impeccable Grooming: Make sure your hair, nails, and makeup are neatly done and appropriate for the occasion.

Minimalist Accessories: Choose simple, elegant accessories that complement but do not overpower your outfit.

Hi! Any advice on how to bring up iron levels?

Iron deficiency is quite common among women; it’s best to seek your doctor’s guidance to create a tailored plan that suits your needs.

For best results, consume your iron supplements with a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice or citrus varieties, and consider taking vitamin C supplements to enhance absorption.

Consistency is key - To ensure effectiveness, it’s crucial to take your iron supplements regularly and on an empty stomach. (provided you have no gastric concerns)

Start using cast iron cookware for all your meals; it naturally leaches trace amounts of iron into your food, which offers a beneficial boost for those with iron deficiency, and can help boost iron levels.

Evaluate the factors that inhibit iron absorption to maximize the impact of your diet; steer clear of calcium (such as dairy), phytates in grains and beans, and beverages like coffee and tea, as they can obstruct absorption.

Our bodies are most efficient at absorbing heme iron, with red meat, chicken, beef liver, and certain fish serving as prime sources. We can absorb non-heme iron, albeit with lower efficiency, found in foods such as spinach, tofu, beans, and leafy greens.

Vitamin C enhances the absorption of non-heme iron; consider incorporating more tomatoes, citrus fruits, and red, yellow, and orange peppers into your diet.

Begin incorporating iron-rich juices into your diet, with beet juice being the optimal choice; and aim for daily consumption over a two-week period to boost your iron levels.

Begin your day by drinking blackstrap molasses on an empty stomach every morning. Molasses is an excellent source of iron, calcium, magnesium, and vitamin B6; I personally enjoy taking two tablespoons straight, but it can also be diluted in water.