Voldemort not crucio-ing severus for criticising him!!?! Lets make a new ship!
Okay so this has been my shower thought for the past couple days…what’s the Death Eater initiation process like?? And why do I keep imagining it like some kind of bad PTA meeting?
I mean surely you don’t have to go hunt down Voldy himself to ask to join, so I can only imagine it’s more of a secret club type thing. Somebody pulls you aside and super casually goes “so we get together like twice a month, usually on a Saturday but sometimes during the week, it’s whenever the Dark Lord decides really. It’s mostly at the Malfoy Manor but one time we got summoned to some random graveyard a couple years back?? Now THAT was a meeting for the ages, lemme tell ya…bloody hell. Thirteen years we don’t meet and then within the first two minutes he has the nerve to chew us all out for being disloyal or some shit like that! Crazy. ANYWAY…it really just depends, ya know, where and when we get summoned, so make sure you have your Death Eater attire ready cause Voldy really hates it when you show up in street clothes, and “it’s in the wash” isn’t a good enough excuse, believe me. It’s always potluck style for dinner, so A-M bring a side dish, N-Z bring a dessert…Severus Snape’s allergic to tomatoes so might wanna avoid those. Oh, and here’s the best part!! If you join, you get this wicked tattoo!”
Which brings me to my next thought…is Voldy an amateur tattoo artist and does the Dark Mark tattoos himself? If so, I gotta think that his drawing has gotten better over the years from the first time he tattooed one of his followers.
Voldemort: *tattooing Lucius’ arm* Alright, you’re done!
Lucius: What…is it supposed to be?
Bellatrix: It’s clearly a snake, Lucius!
Narcissa: *pointing* Yeah, but what’s that odd shaped lump above it??
Voldemort: It’s a skull!
Snape: *looking over Lucius’ shoulder, bored AF* Looks like a severed head with its tongue out to me—
Voldemort: OH FUCK OFF SEVERUS
OR…if Voldemort doesn’t give the tattoos himself, then where do they get them? Is Voldy all *claps hands* “Okay, you’re IN! Once we get done with all this paperwork of you swearing your allegiance to me, yada yada….you’re gonna go to this tattoo shop in Knockturn Alley and ask for the Dark Lord Special. Severus said my drawing was shit so I’ve decided to have someone else do the tattoos…” *side eyes Snape*
New Death Eaters showing up to the shop and the tattoo artist being all like “…Dark Lord Special, huh? I’ll throw in a Nagini tattoo around your bicep for an extra 10 galleons, whaddya say?”
Remus not checking up on Harry for 12 years because he was busy being sad in Wales and Sirius not breaking out of Azkaban for 12 years because he was literally being tortured every single day are not the same thing at all, in this essay I will–
james and sirius
Ron and harry
Oh and also lily and sirius
Write in the tags: who of your OTP / BroTP is the one who lifts the other on their shoulder so that they can see?
i am gonna die if this fic doesnt end up being posted
seeing this on my dash and i haven’t been tagged but i like it, so here, have a snippet from a fic where Sirius finds out about Harry’s abuse at the Dursleys post-PoA.....
“Look, Harry... are you uncomfortable with me asking questions?”
“No, it’s - okay.”
“You don’t seem so, love.” The endearment slips out of Sirius casually, without a second thought, and it takes him a moment to realize why Harry’s looking at Sirius with slightly widened eyes. He tilts his head. “Are you okay with that?”
“With what...?” Harry’s voice is a little high.
“Endearments.”
Harry swallows, shrugs. “Yeah, I guess... I’ve never had it before.”
Sirius’ chest knots. “Never?”
“Yeah. But, I like it.”
He exhales a tight coil of breath. “Alright, love.”
@goodgodfathersiriusblack
After the first task, Sirius reaches out to Harry to offer dating advice for the Yule Ball, which changes things.
AO3
***
Given that the first task is finally over, and Harry survived, Sirius can breathe a little sigh of relief. At least one task down, and the fact that he did so well makes Sirius incredibly proud. Next on the order of business for Harry is probably the Yule Ball. Since he’s a champion he’s probably going to have to open it, and it may be a bit presumptuous, but Sirius couldn’t resist offering dating advice to his godson. He figures he’s young and he doubts the Dursleys would bother to offer much guidance.
Hopefully, Harry doesn’t really need too much, but Sirius had to offer just in case.
Sirius smiles when he gets another owl so quickly, Harry writing to him will always make his day.
Sirius,
What do you mean there’s a ball for Yule? What do you mean that I have to open the ball?
No, no – they can’t really expect that from me, right?
You’re pulling my leg, right? Please tell me you’re pulling my leg.
If not, I need help.
Say hi to Buckbeak.
Harry
Sirius is stunned for half a second. How had Harry not known about this? Then, again, no one appears to tell the kid anything.
Alright, well, at least Sirius was right to offer. He’ll just have to meet with his kid on his own and give some concrete advice.
Everything will be okay. He’s sure of it.
***
“I still don’t get how they could expect this of me,” Harry groans as he sits on the floor of the cave beside Sirius. “I mean – dragons are one thing, but girls?”
Sirius laughs. “They’re not as scary as you think.”
“They travel in packs, and they giggle like … like my mere presence is hilarious.”
“They’re giggling because one or more of them have a fancy of you – hard not to given everything, and they travel together because … well, I never really understood that.”
“What am I supposed to do?” Harry questions, seeming quite freaked out. “You were right, McGonagall says I have to open the ball with a date, and it’s only been like a day and a half, and every girl has gone nutty and I don’t know how to dance and I don’t want to go on a date… this is – this is unfair.”
“And the whole dragon thing wasn’t unfair?”
“The dragon thing was actually kind of fun.”
Sirius snorts and rolls his eyes. “Alright, let’s start with the basics. First, you have to select who you’re thinking of asking. I would suggest someone you either fancy and want to get to know – but know there will be awkwardness and you’ll have to push passed that or a friend that you could potentially enjoy an evening with. You could perhaps go with a friend that is someone you may possibly fancy or go with a friend that is someone who would only be a friend, but you’d have to be clear about that. Do you have any ideas?”
He watches as Harry digests this information and says, “Well, I could go with Hermione if I wanted just a friend, but I think that would upset Ron and frankly, be unfair to her. I’d really like to go with Cho Chang – I kind of, maybe, have a fancy of her, but all I know about her is that we’re both seekers. I suppose another friend could be like Parvati Patil or maybe Katie Bell. I’ve talked to both enough that maybe it could be… a friend date.”
Sirius nods. “Okay, let’s leave Hermione out of it. We wouldn’t want to disrupt your friendship with Ron again so soon.”
“Agreed.”
“That leaves Cho, Parvati, and Katie. Now, this is where you have to make a decision – do you want someone that you barely know, but fancy or you know, but don’t fancy?”
Harry shrugs. “I mean – it would be nice to get to know Cho better.”
“Okay, that’s fair. You’ll have the dinner and dancing to get to know her, if you ask her,” Sirius states. “Now, before asking, you should make it clear that you’re not that into dancing, but if you ask any of them to go, you should expect to dance more than just the opening dance.”
He groans. “It’s bad enough having to do it once.”
Sirius nods. “Yes, but you’re going to a ball. It’s expected that you dance. If you don’t want to dance too much, you should make that clear so that they don’t expect to be dancing all night and are disappointed.”
“Okay, but what if I tell them and they say no?”
“Then you have to accept no for an answer and find someone else who would be willing to support you.”
Harry nods. “I suppose that I should try and learn dancing then?”
“That would be a good endeavor. I’d suggest asking someone you’re comfortable with to practice or your date would be better, but it could be embarrassing admitting that, so you could always Hermione or one of the quidditch girls who would no doubt love to help you.”
“That sounds like a good plan,” Harry states. “What about the actual asking? If they’re traveling in packs…”
Sirius laughs. “They may giggle, but simply ask for a moment alone and once you’re alone, tell them either – that you’d like a romantic date to the ball or a friend date to the ball – depending on who you ask. Explain about the dancing to help them make a decision, and once they do – if it’s yes, ask them to meet up to practice dancing or if it’s no, accept their answers and move on. Just be sweet and polite and you’ll be okay.”
“That sounds easier than it’s probably going to be.”
“It’s usually not that bad, I promise. Maybe a little embarrassing, but the sooner you do it, the better,” Sirius assures him. “Then you can focus on the actual date.”
Harry grimaces. “Besides dancing, what would be expected?”
“Well, you should meet her at her common room probably with a nice flower – try asking her favorite or finding one that matches her dress robes.”
Harry nods. “Sounds easy.”
“You should offer your arm, and smile as you lead the way into the ball and take out her seat first before you sit. At dinner, make sure you talk to her about her interests. Start with something you have in common and let the conversation flow. If it stalls, try to ask about things that are around you – the food, the music, the dancing, the people… anything that can spark something. Remind her about being uncomfortable with too much dancing, but that you’ll make an effort.”
“Okay, okay. Seems like genuinely good advice so far,” Harry says. “Then, of course, the dancing. I suppose if we practice before it might not be so bad.”
“I’m sure it won’t be as bad as you’re imagining,” Sirius assures him. “Make sure to still pay attention to her as you dance, and if need be, make light conversation. If you’re done dancing or taking a break, try finding a quiet area to continue chatting from dinner. Don’t ignore her and even if it ends up being Parvati or Katie rather than who you fancy, remember that you can’t just glare at your fancy’s date – just focus on your own date.”
“Yeah, that – that wouldn’t be fair to her if I was staring at some other girl.”
“Exactly. The focus should be on making sure that you’re both having a good time.”
“Okay. Okay. What about at the end?”
“Walk her back to her dorm, tell her you had a great time – if you fancy her (and this could go for if the date started as a friend, but you find you do like her) – then ask her to have another date. This could be something simple and we can talk about that when the time comes in a letter. Just maybe vaguely ask if she’d like to go out again. If she says yes, tell her that you’ll let her know a time and place, if she says no – respect it and thank her for being your date and that you hope she enjoyed it.”
“And… then leave?”
Sirius tries not to laugh. “Well, she might expect a kiss on the hand, the cheek or even the lips. It all depends on the vibe, just go with your instincts on that one.”
Harry swallows, but nods. “I guess.”
“It’s not as bad as it sounds,” Sirius attempts to assure him. “Just take it one step at a time. You’ll be fine.”
“If you’re sure…”
“I am, I promise.”
***
A few weeks later, Sirius knows that Harry’s managed to ask Cho to the ball. He’s nervous, but he’s been preparing for the ball, and Sirius has assured him that it should be just fine. He just needs to relax and not worry so much.
He also told him to write to him afterwards no matter the outcome. He wants to know how well his advice went over.
He grins when the owl arrives.
Sirius,
Thank you – thank you – thank you! Your advice was perfect.
Cho and I had a great date. We practically danced the night away! Okay, maybe not. She was okay with only dancing half the time, but we went for a walk and – and it went so great that she kissed me before the end of the night!
There was plenty of kissing before a final dance and walking her back to the dorm. It went so well she said yes to a second date.
So, now, I need advice on that. Got any ideas?
Thanks again,
Harry
Sirius grins, happy for his kid. He’s happy to offer more dating advice as long as his kid needs it.
He’ll certainly be a ladies’ man after this.
Just like his father and godfather and it’s great.
@impishtubist
We neeeed u to write this
About Sirius always having Harry’s back.
Sirius: “MY godson would NEVER punch your… kid….”
Harry: *aggressively shaking his head*
Sirius: “Unless YOUR kid deserved it. Because to me it looks like he did”
Carla when I tell you I almost sent this EXACT scenario to @impishtubist two hours ago 😂😂😂 CACKLING
Ron was the one who taught Harry how to tie his shoe laces, after he noticed Harry tucked his laces into his shoes. "No-one ever cared enough to teach me..." "I care enough."
Both Ron and Harry were with Hermione when she started her period for the first time. "I'm...BLEEDING" "Calm down, it's your period, its just the shock of it, My sister got hers last year." "should I get Mcgonagall-"
Ron is the only one of the 3 who regularly goes to breakfast, he tends to pack toast in his bag to give to Harry and Hermione because sometimes they forget or they just don't bother and IT WORRIES HIM-
Harry and Hermione have the same favourite book as a child. Matilda, both relate to the book in very different ways. "It just gave me hope, really, she discovered her magic and found someone who loved her." "Harry, you also found people who love you" "I know"
Harry memorised how ron and Hermione drink their tea. Ron dash of milk, lots of sugar. Hermione, lots of milk, 1 sugar. He makes the best cups of tea. "It's really a ghastly amount of Sugar Ron-" "Your tea is literally whiter than me, don't judge"
Ron bakes treacle tart and jam tarts for Harry and Hermiones birthdays.
Harry and Hermione were once mistaken for siblings, and neither of them corrected the person. "Yeah, she's my older sister" ron would never forget the smiles on their faces. Everytime Hermione would go back to that Cafe, they would always ask about her younger brother.
Hermione was also the first person to hug Harry since he was placed with the Dursleys when he was 1. Ron was the second person to hug him.
Harry used to leave change around Rons room when he knew he was a few sickles short of something he knew Ron wanted. Because Ron would never accept money from Harry. Ron never found out, but Hermione saw him do it one day. "Your secret is safe with me"
Ron and Hermione are the Godparents to Harry and Ginny's children. And vice Versa. (Exept Lily Luna, whose God Parents are Neville and Luna)
Harry has a photo album filled with photos of him and his friends, that made in 2nd year, that album starts with him and ron and hermione, and ends with him and his family together.
It was actually Hermione who taught Harry how to tie his tie for school, and she wouldn't let him get on the boat without "being in proper uniform. Just because your the boy who lived doesn't mean you can just not tie your tie."
Harry and Ron were eachothers best men.
Ron and Hermione sometimes purposely walk slowly, when Harry finally starts to open up, so that he has more time to talk and won't close back up when they near where they're going.
Harry and Ron carrying some of hermiones work for her in lessons they share, because "Mione, you'll break your back carrying all that?!?!" "Yeah Ron's right- why the fuck do you have so much paper?!?!" "Parchment" "YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT HERMIONE-"
Harry and hermione sharing their favourite muggle treats with ron "Mars bars mine" "I've always loved strawberry laces myself!!" And Ron sharing his favourite wizard treats with them.
Harry teaching Ron how to cook the muggle way and Ron teaching Harry how to cook the magic way. (Hermione was banned from the kitchen after she got frustrated with the spells and just decided to leave the boys to it as they actually enjoyed it) "I mean, you cooked for us during the hunt, the least we can do is cook for you now!" "You don't have to be good at everything, babe!!" "FINE-"
Harry, Ginny, Ron and Hermione make sure too meet up for lunch at least twice a week, as they have busy lives now and they want to make that effort too see eachother. They've only missed around 15 of these, either because of honeymoons, child birth, Harry being "INJURED WHAT THE FUCK MATE DID YOU DO?!" "He was stabbed" "LIGHTLY stabbed" "YOU BLOODY PASSED OUT FROM BLOOD LOSS-" "eh" "EH?!?!?"
“So… what?” Remus gaped, “We just leave things as they are?”
Sirius scratched behind his ear, looking down, a strange, shy gesture.
“I’d rather not.”
“You’d rather not.” Remus repeated, dumbfounded.
“No. I mean, if you want me to go ‘round telling everyone I know then sorry, but we’re not all as ballsy as you. I need more time. But… I could try.”
“You could try.” This was not the outcome Remus had expected when the conversation began. “What do you m--”
Sirius cut him off, placing a palm on Remus’s cheek to turn it towards him, and kissing him gently on the lips.
“I mean I will try.” He said, as he pulled away. “I miss you, Moony.”
Oh, you would go and say something like that… Remus grabbed him and pulled him back. It was like water after a drought, shelter in a storm - they were the still point of the turning world and every other stupid sloppy cliché you could think of. They kissed for a long time, and when they came apart they were practically gasping with relief.
“No more girls?” Remus asked, still holding Sirius in place, as if he might run away.
“No more girls.” Sirius agreed. “Let’s see how this pans out first.”
“Oh, charming.” Remus let go, satisfied.
“Shuddup,” Sirius nudged him with his shoulder, hands deep inside his pockets. “C’mon, let’s go back to the tent eh? Freezing.”
Credit to Atyd by misskingbean89
I am not really a slash person but even i have to admit this is cute
So what country are u from? How old are you?
P.s .: Never have I ever been so happy to find a friend.... Probably cuz we both love that sirius and harry bonding and fluff fics
Gawwwd i... I would love to be friends with u n @snufuffles is that the name sorry i forgot but i love their writing!!!!! N urs too
screaming crying throwing up omg we r friends i deem it official
and @snufluffles has the best, softest harry&sirius content i miss their writing
thank you 💜
Idk y hes stealing Molly's lines but I do know i love this
Sirius voice is soft, and he doesn’t take his eyes off of Harry’s pale face as he lets out a groan. The boy’s thin limbs twitch from the lingering effects of the Cruciatus.
“No, I’m here,” Harry mutters. “Fuck. This hurts like hell. No wonder they call it an Unforgiveable. I sure as hell won’t be forgiving Bellatrix any time soon.”
Sirius doesn’t crack a smile. “I’m gonna call Pomfrey. The potion shouldn’t be letting you feel anything.”
“No wait,” says Harry through gritted teeth. “I think that’s the last of it.” Indeed, as soon as he’s done speaking, his arms and legs still.
Sirius lets out a sigh of relief. “You hurting anywhere else?”
“No. I think Pomfrey gave me enough to knock out an threstral.”
Sirius’ lips twitch. “Then should I be concerned that you’re still conscious?”
“Nah. I’m always an anomaly when it comes to healing.” Despite his words, Harry’s head starts to loll to the side and his breathing begins to slow. Sirius reaches for his hand and intertwines their fingers.
“I don’t like seeing you hurt,” Sirius says quietly. Harry cracks one eye open.
“I’d be concerned if you did,” he responds.
Sirius’ face darkens. “Next time I see her, she’s dead.”
“Good,” Harry breathes, the word barely intelligible as he drifts into unconsciousness.
“Have you gone from me?” Sirius whispers, eyes locked on the still face of his child. There’s no response. Sirius leans forward and kisses his forehead. He rises up out of his chair, untangling his fingers from Harry’s now-lax hand, and moves towards the door.
“Not my kid, you bitch,” he mutters under his breath as he strides out of the hospital wing, wand in his hand.
I love the good godfather sirius black thingie!!!
@goodgodfathersiriusblack
Prompt - First Day of School
Sirius isn't ready for Harry's first day of primary school, but it turns out it's perfect.
AO3
***
Despite the fact that Sirius had gotten to spend the last few years as a stay-at-home parent and knew that this time was coming, he’s still sad even as he packs Harry’s bag for his first day of school. They had gone shopping the day before to make sure he had all of his school supplies. He’d picked out a nice outfit for the first, and once he’s packed, it’ll be time to tuck Harry in and before he knows it – they’ll be at the school… for Harry’s first day.
“Pads?” the small voice of his godson says from the top of the stairs.
“I’ll be up in a minute to help tuck you in, just change into your pajamas.”
“Okay!”
It only takes a few more minutes before he steels himself and goes upstairs. Tonight was the last night before everything would begin to change.
“Ready for bed, kiddo?” Sirius asks, a smile – only slightly forced – on his face. He has no idea what he’s going to do without his kid for hours every day.
“Yeah!” Harry cheers.
“What kind of bedtime story are you looking for tonight?” Sirius questions.
“Will you tell me about your first day of school?”
Sirius let's out a little laugh as he sits beside Harry’s bed. “Well, your dad and I didn’t go to primary school – only Hogwarts, and I’ve told you about meeting your mum and dad on the train ride to school, but your mum did go to primary school.”
“Will you tell me about her first day, then?”
Sirius hums. “Well, she always liked to say that she met her best muggle friend on the first of school. She had sat in the wrong seat and another classmate of hers had said that it was her seat – they were arguing as much as five-year-olds can argue and it turns out her name was Lila and with your mum’s name as Lily – they were so close it was easily mistaken. The teacher thought they should separate the girls, but they became friends instead.”
Harry’s looking at him like that wasn’t much of story – which makes sense, his own story about meeting on the train and James pulling an imaginary sword had been far more entertaining.
“Do you think I’ll make a friend like mum did?” Harry asks, eyes wide like he’s worried about that.
Sirius smiles softly at him. “I’m sure you will, but not if you’re grouchy from lack of sleep. So, get some sleep – big day tomorrow.”
Harry pouts a bit before he yawns. “Night, Pads.”
“Night, kid.”
***
In the morning, Sirius packs Harry’s lunch before helping him with his backpack and taking him by the hand to walk him to the school down the street. His kid is happily chattering on and on about what school might be like and not at all noticing that Sirius isn’t nearly as ready for this as he pretends to be.
He knows that this is what Lily (and James) would’ve wanted, but after so long of never being away from one another, Sirius can’t help freaking out a bit.
He’s just not ready for this – Harry’s not ready for this – maybe … maybe it would be better to hold him back a year … or homeschool him…
But they reach the school before Sirius knows it and he’s … disappointed.
He’s not ready for this.
Unfortunately, that doesn’t matter as they enter the school and Harry happily finds his classroom rather quickly for his age. The teacher greets Harry and says, “Mr. Potter, please go ahead and help Harry find his desk – you can stay until class starts.”
“Thank you,” Sirius says. He doesn’t correct her. James’ parents had practically adopted him, and he hates the Black name, so when they moved, he simply decided to go by Potter, made things easier.
He helps Harry find his desk next to a little boy, whose name plate reads Dean Thomas, and he smiles at the mother beside him.
“Look Dean, here’s your deskmate,” the mother says. “Why don’t you introduce yourself?”
The little boy – Dean – smiles and introduces himself, and Harry smiles and does the same after a quick nod from Sirius.
Then, in his excitement once Dean shows him what he’d been drawing, Harry turns to him and says, “Look, Paddy, I made a friend.”
Sirius barely stifles his laugh as he says, “You sure did.”
Before anything else could be said, the teacher calls for last goodbyes and he hugs Harry tight, like he doesn’t want to let him go, and barely contains his desire to cry. Another parent – not Dean’s mother – says, “Don’t worry, the day will go by faster than you think.”
Sirius nods, and let's go, telling Harry to be good and learn lots before following the other parents outside the classroom. The one that had spoken to him, introduces himself as Holly’s father, and says, “First one?”
“And only,” Sirius says. “He’s technically my godson/nephew. I won’t have kids of my own, but I’ve been raising him since we lost his parents. I was a stay-at-home parent and now… well, I don’t know what to do with myself.”
Holly’s father gives him a small smile as they leave with Dean’s mother. “Well, I’ve got a small shop that works on motor vehicles. You know anything about that?”
Sirius grins. “I built my motorbike from scratch. I love motor vehicles.”
“Maybe we could go out to eat and talk about it?”
“I’d like that.”
“Then, let’s go.”
***
Sirius could admit that he rather liked Holly’s father and Dean’s mother (who had come along as well, purely because she also expressed an interest). Their outing had helped pass the day (which did go quickly) before they arrived to pick up their kids.
As soon as he sees Sirius, Harry takes off at a run and straight into a waiting Sirius’ arms. He’s already babbling about his day and his new friends Holly and Dean.
“I made new friends, too,” Sirius teases, gesturing at Holly’s father and Dean’s mother. The adults laugh, but Harry cheers and it’s wonderful.
Holly’s father claps him on the shoulder and Dean’s mother smiles. “I’ll see you both tomorrow?”
“We’ll be here.”
“Good.”
With that, they all wave goodbye and start to head home.
Harry reiterates his entire day all happy and excited and honestly, there’s nothing better than this.
He’s so thrilled that it’s all worked out – they’re both happy and they’re off to brighter future.
The perfect first day of school.