I Would Like To Thank My Arms, For Always Being By Side. My Legs, For Always Supporting Me, And My Fingers…because

a motorcycle gang made up of ancient bisexual norse monarchs: the bikings

throughout your life people will try to tell you that puns aren’t funny. these people are wrong.

Books are the best. They take you to faraway places, and make you feel more at home in the world. They introduce you to new things, and deepen connections with the things you love.

But not everyone has the opportunity to own new books. Over 44 percent of the nation’s children—more than 32 million kids—live in low-income households without access to age-appropriate reading material and educational resources. 

We’re partnering with First Book for the 5th year in a row for our Give Books campaign, and our goal is to donate 30,000 books to children in need—and we need your help!

Take the pledge by reblogging this post, and we’ll match each reblog with a book donation. 

Learn more at givebooks.co

Tumblr and Puns

Rules to learning English

1. their our know rules

there is no reason for “sean” to be pronounced “shawn”

Linguistics Christmas Jokes

allthingslinguistic:

How does a linguist wish someone a joyful Dec 25th? Merry/Mary/marry Christmas!

What are Father Christmas’s linguist sisters and daughters called? Relative Clauses 

What does a linguist say when Santa just won’t leave you alone? He’s lost the stalking/stocking distinction

What is a distinctive feature of the Christmas phonology of non-native English speakers? No-dark-el 

What do linguists do under mistletoe? Make quadrilabial clicks 

What is a minty treat that linguists consume around Christmastime? Chomsky canes 

Which carrot-nosed entity came to life in a particularly strident fashion? Fricative the snowman

Who is a grammatical but unattested candidate for pulling a linguist’s sleigh? Rudolph the colourless-green-nosed reindeer 

What nutmeg-sprinkled beverage does one drink around Linguistmas? Wugnog 

What presents did the three wise linguists bring? Goal, epenthesis, and merge

What song do linguist carollers sing?  God rest ye merry grammarian

What do you put on top of an ungrammatical linguistmas tree? *

Don't go off on a tangent, now.

Math jokes aren’t funny nothing about math is funny math is a sin

6 was scared of 7 because 7, 8 ,9 but why did 7 eat 9?

Because you’re supposed to eat 3 squared meals a day.