If Loser Demigods Had Access To Google Slides Me Thinks

So I’m back about Rachel and Percy being bffs. So Rachel’s dad is famous right? She posts pictures of Percy on her Instagram and people are just like

Person1: Wasn’t that the dude who was a terrorist at like 12??

Person2: This dude also destroyed our school gym

Person3: wtf is he doing with a multi-millionaires daughter

So obviously the internet has crazy conspiracy theories about this like

Person1: Is she joining his cult -

Person2: Maybe she’s becoming an environment terrorist

Person3: Percy Jackson? Environment terrorist pls

But the thing is Percy Jackson is a huge environmentalist because Grover and Rachel right so the internet loses their shit

Person2: I told you environment terrorist-

Person3: My life is a lie

And obviously you have the people concerned for Rachel’s safety cause she’s hanging out with a delinquent and they’re like

Headline: Heir of Dare enterprises being manipulated by terrorist

And obviously Rachel’s pissed about it so you know what she’s going to do? She kisses Percy with no warning during some school assembly and people take photos and everyone’s like they’re dating?? (spoiler alert: they’re not but they pretend they are cause it’s easier)

Person1: Did you see how Rachel kissed Percy? Manipulated my ass

Person2: I’m more concerned with the fact that Percy Jackson, the terrorist is blushing

So this starts conspiracy theories that say that Rachel’s an underground cia agent who’s trying to bring in the terrorist organisation Percy’s head of and Percy is just like

Percy: I hate you

Rachel: You knew what you signed up for

Basically Percy and Rachel being bffs and clowning the world y’all

I think if you asked Percy what his favorite animal is he’d be like ‘oh! definitely my buddy jeff! :)’ and then pull out his phone and show you a selfie of him in the fucking midnight zone smiling next to the most terrifying and fucked up deep sea creature that scientists literally haven’t discovered yet 

I love cryptid!percy more than anything. I wanna see someone live streaming another exploration into the marianna’s trench and the camera pans to show percy visibly smoking a joint rolled in seaweed. he gives a ‘sup nod to the camera.

Geralt getting whacked with a truth spell but instead of Jaskier hearing a confession of love and an outpour of hidden emotions he gets days of a manic Geralt rambling like Brian David Gilbert revealing the most off-kilter unexpected secrets ever, turning his whole worldview upside down with revelations like

okay, but percy being poseidon's kid gives him so many advantages that we probably never thought of. like, this boy can probably chew ice like it's no one's business, and not hurt his teeth. he can probably drink straight from the ocean without having to boil it beforehand. he has never choked on his spit in his life. he can probably run on wet, slippery floors and not fall. like, the possibilities are endless. i deadass would love a list.

Adult Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase are the most surreal power couple in the mortal world.

Annabeth Chase, world renowned architect who was entrusted with repairs and renovation on the Empire State Building…

…and her husband, this guy who was wanted by the FBI for blowing up the St Louis Arch seventeen years ago

this but obx

Bruce, freshly showered and in comfy pajamas, settles down at the kitchen island with a contented sigh. It’s been a long patrol—Clark had tried to intervene in a Riddler scheme and had crashed into the side of a water tower—and Bruce is ready to relax with one of his favorite treats. Smiling, he sets the Cadbury Creme Egg on his porcelain dish and sets to carefully unwrapping the foil. After carefully repositioning it several times, he readies his knife and fork to dig in to his prize.

Jason, hiding on top of the fridge: Hmm. Bruce is enjoying himself.

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travelling back to the paleolithic era to explain to a neanderthal that in the future there will be food that is simultaneously disgusting and also the best tasting food you've ever eaten. the neanderthal nods and says "oh yeah we have that" and leads me to a clearing in the woods where a perfectly normal mcdonalds sits.