WHAT IS HIS PROBLEM

mary jane would carry around a deck of tarot cards and pretends to read the gang's future (she insisted and peter is rolling his eyes but intrigued) but really she's just making shit up and flash is eating it up in a way you wouldn't believe .harry cries

1/5 star review to this superhero couple

Do NOT hire them

atsv caroljess for the soul

Silk, Spider-Woman, and Spider-Gwen in Spider-Women Alpha 001

I've been saying this for years but I've finally found the funniest way to say it, in the MCU Tony Stark isn't so much Peter Parker's father figure as he is his deadbeat dad figure. Like Tony shows up once a year to take Peter to a baseball game kinda vibe. Tony in homecoming is like hey kid I know I haven't seen or spoken to you in months but I bought you something and that's basically the same as emotional support. Tony taking Peter to Germany in civil war is like when your deadbeat dad tells your mom you're having father-son time but he's really just taking you to his guys' poker night and trying to get you to cheat for him. When Tony says you're nothing without the suit then you shouldn't have it, it's like when your dad says if you're not going to follow my rules in my house you can leave, I put a roof over our heads what else could you possibly want from me. Tony mourning Peter after infinity war and calling him his kid is like when your dad only wants to hang out with you after he's lost custody. Like well and truly deadbeat behavior no wonder the fanon is like that

peter benjamin parker ily

i need you to kill yourself

sir yes sir *aims revolver at own head, misses all 6 shots, walks away dejected*

in the earlier spider-man comics whenever someone is rude to peter his internal monologues feel like this