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"light yagami is a misogynist" I say into the mic.

the crowd boos. I begin to walk off in shame, when a voice speaks and commands silence from the room.

"she's right... surprising, for a woman", they say. i look for the owner of the voice. there in the 5th row stands light yagami.

i don’t know if anyone’s done this before, but i’m genuinely curious — like if you ship codywan, reblog if they’re one of your favorite star wars ships?

even more of my favorite fics:

some grief, some joy • spinawren The Question of Home • a_frozen_abyss Go Your Own Way • Starshot then a small thing happened • BeaArthurPendragon say it soft and it's almost like praying • Somanywords there's a bear in the woods • itsnotbleak A Haunted House With A Picket Fence • lavenderpanic great whales of the sea • canistakahari Preberseeschießen • Ginny_Potter they're gonna send us to prison for jerks • napricot

Emperor!Hunter

after the gangTM deals with the collector and. Belos. The boiling isle is going to have no ruler and be recovering from the collector’s games. I bet there’s going to be at least some people who are like “we should follow monarchy rules and let Hunter be emperor.”

Would it happen? No probably not. But it would be funny watching our favorite traumatized boi try to skirt responsibility (mostly cause he doesn’t think he should be in charge), trying to prove that he shouldn’t be Emperor.

some Belos loyalist, thinking that they can use Hunter to regain their political power: the boy should be king!! It’s his divine right!

Hunter, the “boy” in question, who can barely remember to feed himself and hasn’t slept in the past four days: …why???

It's gonna be such a funny mess when Donald Trump dies of a stroke on April 1st, 2024.

Naturally everybody will think it's fake because of the date only to lose their minds (both positively and negatively based on their opinion of trump) when realizing it's real

There will be massive celebrations in the streets and on social media and lots of predictable "don't speak ill of the dead" discourse about those celebrations

Weird evangelicals will pull some weird number trick talking about how Jesus was conceived on April 1st and that makes Trump a sort of messiah and people will make fun of that

The Republicans (after they're done with the faux-sadness and faux-outrage) will stomp over each other to be his successor but none of them will succeed. They'll tear each other apart and have no single nominee for the November elections.

There will be discourse about if Biden and the living former presidents should go to his funeral (they won't, he was a traitor insurrectionist)

The Ukraine-Russia War immediately goes in favor of Ukraine as morale in the Kremlin is reduced. China similarly backs off from its threats on Taiwan.

Ten thousand new memes are made, some sticking around for years to come.

Not a month later a bunch of unofficial biographies of Trump hit the bookshelves, many with new details about just how awful he was.

Season 4: mmm bowl cuts

i love thinking about hunter's staff as a disability aid ESPECIALLY because of the context it adds to hunting palismen it's . so funny. oh my goD hunter can't catch a single break in the enTIRE EP fuckin IMAGINE you're just. trying to do your evil job of being evil evilly in peace and then some random annoying 14-year-old anarchist shithead who shouldn't even BE there grabs your cane HURLS it INTO THE ABYSS crashes your ship KNOCKS YOU UNCONSCIOUS smacks you awake FINDS your cane STEALS your cane makes you CHASE HER THROUGH ALLEYS TO GET IT BACK makes FUN OF YOU for struggling without your cane briefly tries to MURDER you WITH your cane then after all of this she just gives it back to you cuz you're accidentally buddies and you're like "are you sure. cause like i'll take it i mean i still gotta do my evil job but you're REALLY gonna wish i was WAY more disabled in 10 minutes" lo and behold she should not have been sure. THEN you end up letting her go anyway and failing to do your job because you're having really weird feelings about the whole thing and also about how nice she is and also about how you feel kinda bad for being evil for some reason. this girl stole your disability aid and tried to murder you like 7 times.

💀

bonus:

bsd fanfic recs

some of my absolute favorite fics I’ve read in the few months I’ve been insane about bsd. what are you guys doing if you haven’t read these.

tell me we do not live in vain by @valleykey・fyozai・57.1k, T, completed・relationship study・character study・travel fic

Fyodor’s weak heart thuds violently within its cage of flesh and bone, ba-thump. Dazai’s knife kisses cold on the skin of their throat. They swallow, and the bob of their Adam’s apple against it draws blood. “Alright,” Fyodor decides, “let’s find a way to die.”

// In the Decay’s aftermath, Fyodor and Dazai quietly slip through the cracks, and set on a journey.

through the pages by @valleykey・oda & dazai・5.3k, gen, completed・alternate universes

Near-infinity is finite. It’s not even close to real infinity. An infinity of coin flips will yield endless heads and endless tails, but it’s possible to flip a coin ten million times and land tails each one. “There’s a lot of bad that could be written in a book.” Oda doesn’t falter. “There’s a lot of good, too.”

///OR: snapshots of Dazai and Oda, across universes.

apocynum by @minusboy・skk・27.8k・M・completed・hanahaki au (with a twist!)

“Don’t bleed on the carpet,” Dazai says, as if it’s even his carpet he’d be bleeding on. “I’ll make you bleed,” he says, although it comes out half-hearted as well as weird and distorted with the tissue blocking his nose. Dazai just smiles at him beatifically. “Promise?”

on fresh wounds and picking on scabs

eternal game of tug & war by @blackwaves・2.9k, explicit, completed・sex dreams・character study

There’s something open, vulnerable, and overwhelmed on her face, and she gasps out the same high, breathy sound she lets out when she’s been running after a suspect, chokes out a string of please, please, please. Ayatsuji watches her do it and says: “This isn’t even maintaining plausibility anymore.” She straightens up. More familiar, there’s indignance on her face— “You can’t be criticizing me for your own sex dream. For one thing.” “It’s a valid critique.”

Or: the sex dream montage fic wherein Ayatsuji is psychosexually weird about all involved.

that fucked up girl by @strawberry-skies-xx・dazai & yosano・3.1k, gen, completed・gender study

The first time Dazai meets Yosano, he’s struck with such a strong wave of want that it catches in his throat, clogs it until he can’t speak. It doesn’t happen often. Dazai’s masks are carefully crafted, but Yosano is all sharp femininity, sleek and elegant, graceful in her beauty, and it hits Dazai like a brick. He stares.

i had a dream about you by @neurosasuke・gin & kyouka・5.5k, gen, completed・character study・relationship study

Her fingers clenched around the cone carton in her hand, crushing her precious breakfast into mush. “Senpai,” Kyouka said, her tone flattened by an iron. This couldn’t be happening. Akutagawa Gin met her eyes with an implacable stare. In one hand she held three fabric bags full of fresh produce from the vendors around them, and in the other was a cup of unsweetened milk tea. The pearls rattled as Gin took a long sip from her drink. The duo held eye contact until Gin concluded her task with a noisy smack of her lips. “Izumi,” Gin greeted sweetly, her voice barely able to be heard over the sounds of the early crowd. “Since when did you start shopping here?”

love that doesn’t have a place to rest by @blackwaves・gin-centric・1.9k, gen, completed・beast au gin

There are no good ways to say, I love my brother, and I think he is evil, and no good rooms to say it in.

Or: Gin, after it’s done.

oh, the echoes in my mind— by @nyrlthtp・sigma-centric・2k, gen, completed・sigma character study

It’s a name they’ve taken for themself, but it’s true to who they are now. They don’t remember ever having another name, and they doubt they ever will remember. They dance around questions about their past with an elegant skill that would be impressive to anyone who knew what to look for. Their words don’t falter, and neither do their hands as they deal out cards at tables themself, glossing over their own deep sorrow that’s salved by the casino and the casino alone. One would think they’d been at this casino for their entire life.

bleeding heart dove by @minusboy・skk・4.2k, M, completed・character study・telepathy

He thinks about Chuuya, or rather, he thinks about the god residing under his skin, the manic glint in his eye, head thrown back in laughter, exposing the delicate line of his throat, thinks about gravity twisting his bones into inhuman angles, the blood pouring out of every orifice on his body. He thinks about Chuuya, beautiful, frightening, human.

learning how to let go and how to drive, not necessarily in that order

hold the hand of the god-child, as he falls from the sky by @strawberry-skies-xx・dazai & mori・7k, gen, completed・relationship study

Mori stands up, walking over to see the empty cup of matcha resting on the armrest, curled loosely in one hand, and Dazai sound asleep. He’s so small like this, lost in the big clothing, the couch he’s on. Not for the first time, Mori wonders what he’d do if he wasn’t head of the mafia. If he’d still find Dazai. If he could help him with more than stitches and hot tea.

till death, I’ll give you my breath by @booksandpaperss・skk・24.6k, M, ongoing・time/death loop・relationship study

“Here’s what’s gonna happen,” Chuuya starts, conviction (and probably some desperation) firm in his voice. “Neither of us are gonna leave this damn room. Call in sick, or whatever the fuck I don’t care, but you’re not going into work, or anywhere today. I’ll fucking hold you down just like this if I have to. Got it?” Dazai cocks his head, and Chuuya can tell he’s really trying hard to maintain the bored look on his face. Chuuya’s known Dazai long enough to recognize when he’s curious. “Am I being held hostage by the mafia right now? Is that what’s happening?”

In which Dazai succeeds in the death he’s always longed for, and Chuuya and Atsushi will do whatever it takes to save the man who saved them before they even realized they were being saved. However many times it takes.

A study in loving someone who refuses to be loved.

Last Train Home by @valleykey・sigma-centric・27.1k, gen, completed・character study・post canon

In the Decay’s aftermath, the Port Mafia’s Nakahara Chuuya finds Sigma among the sunlit silvers of Suribachi city. He grins viciously. “In that case, let’s get you your Casino back.”

/// Sigma picks up their pieces.

in the mirror, i bloom by ephemeralis・skk・12k, T, completed・hanahaki au

It twists him, turns him, curls in his chest like something alive, something he knows but can’t dare to name. Chuuya curses the red-black petals that fall from his lips, these nearly rotten things that tear him apart from the inside out. Part of him wants to rip his own traitorous heart out, through a ribcage shattered by feelings he can’t contain. Anger is easy, a thing he’s learned to control. This— whatever the hell this is— is not. Or at least it’s easier to feel as though this is beyond his own control, because Chuuya is not in love. (It feels like a lie even to himself.)

After he’s hit by a strange ability, Chuuya is forced to consider truths he’d much rather keep hidden- but not everything is as simple it seems.

brutal out here! by @valleykey・fyozailai・4.8k, T, completed・suicide practice fic minus actual suicide

“Oh my God,” Nikolai gasps into the phone, because he can’t let there be a pause, because—”you’re killing yourselves and you didn’t even invite me!?” “Not really,” Fyodor says, almost diplomatic, “it’s more like practice.” “Roleplay, if you will,” Dazai adds enthusiastically, from what must be the bathtub, “but like, irl. And with the potential to get rushed to the hospital.”

5D Chess With Multiverse Time Travel by @valleykey・fyozai・7.2k, T, completed・teen fyozai meet for the first time

Chuuya’s self restraint breaks. “What are you even doing?” Dazai doesn’t even spare him a glance. “Playing 5D chess with multiverse time travel against the enemy.” Chuuya squints. He has to be fucking with him. “What?” “And I’m losing, Chuuya,” and now he finally looks at him, manic grin snaking across his cheeks, voice plunging from blank to downright giddy. Giddy. What the fuck. “He’s a demon.”

/// OR: Chuuya finds himself in the unfortunate position of witnessing Dazai meet Fyodor.

abominable by @valleykey・fyodor-centric・5.3k, M, completed・character study

You’re seven when your ability awakens. You calculate how long it’ll be until anyone finds the bodies. You take a shower before the blood dries, change clothes, and don’t sleep the entire night. When the sun rises, you go to church.

///OR: Fyodor, through the years.

some say we’re born into the grave by @obsidianstrawberrymilk・kouyou & kyouka・5.2k, T, completed・idol au・relationship study

“Now, Kyouka? Really? You’re about to be on stage in one of the biggest festivals in the nation and you’re crying about something?” Kyouka debates telling her it had been unintentional, and barely ‘crying’ at all, but decides against it; if anything, talking back makes it worse. Kouyou’s nails dig further into her skin; not enough to bleed and unlikely to bruise, Kyouka knows. Not her face - too valuable. Kyouka can’t say there’s any bitterness there; it’s a fact. Music is what she’s good at, and Kouyou directs where she goes with it. Failure is not an option. Not in this world she’s found herself in.

Or: Kouyou Ozaki is idol Kyouka Izumi’s manager. How Kyouka feels about it isn’t anyone’s concern.

scream into the empty (can anybody hear me?) by @obsidianstrawberrymilk・gin & ryuunosuke・4k, T, completed・selective mutism・character study

Gin never realizes that there’s something wrong with them until age twelve, when their brother joins the Port Mafia, and them alongside him. Suddenly, their silence is not just offhand on the side of useful; it’s noticeable. It’s abnormal. It’s something that makes them a target.

Or: Gin Akutagawa, growing up, and selective mutism.

chuuya rockstar au