Historically Accurate Offerings To The Theoi

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My Biggest Problem

Miso isn’t my biggest problem anymore. I know you’re gonna be like, 

“Bullh*ck, misophonia is the worst thing that ever happened to me, it’s ruined everything, ect.!!” 

But, my young, young dudes, I have some news. Adulthood is surprising as h*ck and has a lot of bumps and turns and I never anticipated in my whole of angsteenager existence that there would be life after miso.

For example, if anyone’s watched the video (x) I posted a hot while ago, they’d see that I’ve come out as ftm transgender and I’ve left home. I got engaged in December to @living-with-miso, my longtime Tumblr crush and we’re getting married next month.

 My type 3 Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (EDS) exploded into wondering each day if I can walk or use my hands. 

My computer broke. I need to buy socks. The milk in the fridge is expired.

And I know that mostly sounds like, 

“Gee, thanks Stephan, so you’re saying everything gets worse?” 

but man, I actually would say I’ve never been happier. 

You see, when you move out, you move away from the people who trigger you the most in the world: your family. You may have new people who trigger you, like a roommate, but eventually, you’re gonna be in a situation where you can more or less have total control over your environment. Make sure you choose a life partner that accepts every inch of you, and don’t settle for anything less.

When you grow up, you’ll be able to manage your life in a way you can control, to an extent. You literally don’t even have to attend classes in person anymore, almost anything is available online! Yeah, you’ll have days where you just want to rip your ears off and replace your hands with chainsaws because you need to attend job training, attend a family BBQ, or hurriedly make an Irish exit to said BBQ, but that’s not going to be the majority of your life anymore.

And that’s where I’m at. I’m out from the influence of more “adult” adults at the age of 22 and am finally the captain of my own life. 

Which is terrifying, but empowering. I decide if I can attend gatherings, I decide if I want to leave, I decide if I want to stay inside and live on the internet, I decide if I can live with my partner, and I decide if I want to eat cookies for breakfast unless Ashley is home and and tells me no cookies for breakfast (#marriage). 

And if anyone (other than my future wife) has a problem with the way I live my life or make decisions, guess what? I can decide to take my Scissors of H*ck You and cut them right the h*ck out of my beautiful rainbow life.

I may not have the power to decide whether or not I have misophonia, whether my hands work on any given day, or whether or not I have sensory meltdowns, but I can decide how I handle these things.

So I guess my point today is that miso life gets better once you’ve grown up. If you can make it that far, you’ll be happier. And god, I wish my teenage self had known how happy I would one day be. Thank god I decided to stick around.

So stick around, guys. Your life may look like shooty macaroni art, but it’s just practice at this point. One day, you’ll be Bob Ross and decide when and where your next happy little tree goes.

Stay Brave Out There, Stephan [soon-to-be] Vomacka

Bindrune

Green Witchcraft Masterpost

How do you practice green witchcraft? (another)- responses by the gang

Plant Spirit Seals - image, infographic

Save the Bees - by planting these plants, infographic

Peat Pot Planters - to bury spells in

Recreational Witchcraft’s Essential Healing Salve Recipes - 4 herbal recipes

Fire Salts - when you don’t want actual flames, salt, herbs,

Recreational Witchcraft’s Luck & Money Powder - eggshells, herbs

Everyday Plant Magic - tips and ideas, sigils, growth, charging

Healing Herbal Sachet - pouch, ribbon, herbs, crystal - gives options for what herbs and crystals to use

Herbal Crystals for the Green Witch - list of crystals and uses and ideas

Sigil Everything - ideas for sigils in green witchcraft

“heal the earth” - sigil, earth day

Vintage inspired Botanical Illustrations - cool site

Shout out - to black thumb witches

Using Dirt/Soil in Magic Spells - beyond graveyard dirt

Common Poisonous House and Garden Plants, and their Symptoms - call poison control if you’re not sure

Gardening

Indoor Herb Garden - ideas!

Gardening 101 - how to root herbs in water

Beginner Witch Garden - plants, flowers, vegetables and magical uses

Growing and Using Lavender - tips and info

Green Witch Tip - for Mint

Herbs to Grow Indoors - 5 helpful herbs 

Indoor Herb Garden - correspondences by plant 

Herbs and Plants

Herbs to Use in Sleep Magic - organized by herb

Weeds for Witches: Clover - info and magic correspondences

Complete list of Magickal Uses of Herbs/Plants - sorted in alphabetical order, with correspondences

Top 10 Herbs for the Lazy Witch - herbs and ideas and tips

Trees Elemental Correspondences - sorted by element

Indoor Herb Garden - correspondences by plant

Was It A Sign?

Well, maybe. Maybe not. Here are some little things that may help you figure out if it was really a grand message or not! The more of these you have, the more likely it is.

🦉It’s unusual. Let’s say you saw a deer. Sweet! That’s cool, but if you live in a wooded area and deer are really common, it’s really not that profound. It could be a message, or it could just be a deer.

🦉You asked for a sign. If you asked the universe or a certain deity for a sign, perhaps this is the follow through! For this type of thing, it’s usually good to ask for something specific enough that you couldn’t expect it every day, but not so much that it’s impossible. (My go to is a rose or a purple feather.) That way, you know that X thing is your sign without worrying too hard about it!

🦉It felt… different. Maybe the event isn’t terribly wild on its own, but it just really hit you, or the feeling was incredibly profound. Especially after doing research, and seeing how many things are symbols, your brain will make connections really quickly. That means sometimes we make something out of nothing. A strong emotional response is a good sign of a sign.

🦉It immediately felt like a sign. Let’s say you see a rainbow, and it’s really pretty. You enjoy it for a few minutes then go back inside. Later, you think, “Hm, that could have been a sign.” Maybe. But it also could be your brain going hey, I know things associated with rainbows! (In my opinion, this is the most important one. I feel like if you have to wonder if it was a sign, it wasn’t a sign. You might not know what it’s a sign of, but you will know it’s a sign. That’s just my UPG, though.)

🦉Any post-research lines up. If you get a neat vision and run the details through Google, you may find details that line up with certain lore. Maybe you knew this before, maybe not. If you didn’t, and connections keep happening with surprising accuracy, it’s a pretty good indicator!

🦉Think of why you want it to be a sign, if you do. There’s a big narrative that everybody involved in magic, Paganism, etc. is constantly having these profound religious experiences. This simply isn’t true. There’s no shame in wanting a story to share, or to feel special, or to “fit in” by getting signs from the universe. Sometimes we want signs for the sake of receiving signs, so if you’re trying to manufacture them by pulling on every little thing, you’re distracting yourself from enjoying the world exactly how it is. Don’t worry about signs and enjoy yourself. Animals and rainbows and all that are still pretty great even if every little thing doesn’t have a personal meaning.

Monsters & Maw’s ‘Shorter Stories’ Masterlist

Edit which I’m including in all my works after plagiarism and theft has taken place: I do not give my consent for my works to be used, copied, published, or posted anywhere. They are copyrighted and belong to me.

So I figured it was time to create a masterlist of my shorter stories! These were pretty much all done as requests for chunky ten sentence stories, prompts, and ko-fi commissions. Please check my blog’s header for info on whether ko-fi commissions, free requests, and full commissions are open before sending any requests in.

Any content warnings are on the individual stories themselves, at the top of each one. I’ve grouped this list by reader x monster this time. Let me know if any links have broken/lead to the wrong place!

My main masterlist of much longer stories can be found here.

My Patreon masterlist (public/free to browse) can be found here.

My monster stories archive blog is @monstersandmawarchive if you want to turn on notifications or just have my stories with no other posts.

Enjoy! x

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Some stories (particularly older ones) might have funky formatting. Sorry - that’s a tumblr glitch!

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wlw

Female hellhound x female reader (sfw)

Shy female selkie x female extrovert (sfw)

Female deathclaw x female reader (nsfw)

Buff female werecat/rakshasa x female reader (sfw)

Chubby female werewolf x buff female reader (nsfw)

Female sphinx x female reader (nsfw)

Female centaur x female reader (nsfw)

Female orc x female reader (sfw)

Female naga x female reader (nsfw)

Female orc x female reader (sfw)

Female werewolf reader x female human (v. light nsfw)

Female werewolf x female reader (light nsfw)

mlm

Male tentacled monster x chubby male reader (nsfw)

Male werewolf x trans male reader (nsfw)

Male centaur x male reader (nsfw)

Male gargoyle x male reader (nsfw)

Male gorgon x male reader (very light nsfw)

Male tiefling x male reader (angsty, light nsfw)

Male orc x male reader (nsfw)

Male kamaitachi x male reader (light nsfw)

Male demon x male human (nsfw, monster’s pov)

Male mothman x male reader (sfw, fluffy)

{Footsteps in the Snow Masterlist (mlm Skyrim story)}

m/f

Male werewolf x female reader (light nsfw)

Large male demon x female reader (comfort after death of beloved pet, sfw)

Male ‘rabbit’ monster x female reader (sfw)

Big male orc x female reader (nsfw)

Male naga x female reader (sfw)

Male gargoyle x female reader (nsfw) (Alesh’s story Part One (nsfw) Part Two (nsfw))

Male faun x female reader (nsfw)

Male dragon x female reader (sfw)

Male orc x female reader (sfw)

Male werebat x female reader (sfw)

Male jungle troll x tiny elf girlfriend (nsfw)

Big male minotaur x small female reader (nsfw)

Male alien x female reader (nsfw)

Male satyr x female reader (sfw)

Male kelpie x female reader (sfw)

Male naga x female reader (nsfw)

Male shark merman x female reader (nsfw)

Male yautjia x female reader (nsfw)

Male dragon x female reader (sfw)

Male dragon x female reader (light nsfw)

Male naga x female reader (light nsfw)

Male alien x female reader (sfw)

Male fae x female reader (sfw)

Male minotaur x female reader (nsfw)

Male oni x female reader (sfw)

Fluffy male monster x girlfriend (monster pov, nsfw)

Male shadow monster x fem girlfriend (monster pov, light nsfw)

Female dullahan x male reader (nsfw)

Female banshee x male reader (sfw)

Female lamia/naga x male reader (nsfw)

monster x nb/gender-neutral readers

Male kitsune x nb reader (sfw)

Male fae x reader (sfw)

Male orc x reader (sfw) (Garek’s story (nsfw) can be found here - and that one has a female reader)

Female alien x reader (very light nsfw)

Male orc x reader (sfw)

Female naga x nb reader (nsfw)

Sea dragon pirate Captain x human stowaway (nsfw)

NB werewolf x reader (sfw)

Male gargoyle x disabled female presenting nb reader (sfw)

NB insectoid monster x reader (sfw)

Male orc x reader (sfw)

Mothman x reader (nsfw)

Female dragon x nb reader (nsfw)

Male vampire x reader (sfw)

Afab nb reader x afab bat monster (light nsfw)

NB werewolf x reader (angsty, sfw)

Male alien x reader (light sfw) *’smooch’ prompt fill* for Ornorx (nsfw))

Male alien x reader (nsfw, bdsm) *’smooch’ prompt fill* for Ornorx (nsfw))

Scarred male fae x reader (light nsfw) *’smooch’ prompt fill* for Winter from Gnoll boy Brenn’s story - Part One here (nsfw))*

Scarred male fae x reader (light nsfw) *’smooch’ prompt fill* for Winter from Gnoll boy Brenn’s story - Part One here (nsfw))*

Male gargoyle x reader (sfw) *’smooch’ prompt fill*

Female orc x reader (light nsfw) *’smooch’ prompt fill for Bronwyn - Part One here (sfw)*

Female orc x reader (sfw) *’smooch’ prompt fill for Bronwyn - Part One here (sfw)* 

Male gnoll x reader (light nsfw) *’smooch’ prompt fill for Brenn - Part One here (sfw))*

Male gargoyle x reader (light nsfw) *’smooch’ prompt fill for Alesh - Part One (nsfw))*

Male hellhound x reader (light nsfw) *’smooch’ prompt fill for Ranek (nsfw))*

Male naga x reader (light nsfw) *’smooch’ prompt fill for Ascal - Part One (sfw))*

Male centaur x reader (light nsfw) *’smooch’ prompt fill for Iskandar from orc boy Khuruz’ story - Part One (sfw)*

Nb drider x reader (sfw, light angst)

Male rock troll x reader (very light nsfw)

Male dragon x reader (sfw)

Nb gargoyle x reader (sfw)

male naga x male mongoose monster x gn reader (sfw) ‘silly fun in the river’

male orc x gn/male reader (sfw)

female butch tiefling x gn reader (sfw)

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For all early releases, character art and bios, upcoming story info, and much, much more, join me over on Patreon!

You’ll have access to stories before anyone else, and you’ll get instant access Patreon-only content as well, including polls and an exclusive monthly story for those on the Pixies and Goblins tier or higher!

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| Masterlist | Patreon | Ko-fi | Writing Commissions |

@crhserenity my formula that I use for digits is 1. State your intention 2. Put the sentence backwards 3. Get rid of all of the vowels 4. Get rid of all repeating letters 5. Take the letters you have left and connect them all into one solid picture 6. Add little dots and lines and swirls where you want them

I hope this helps a little, and I will try to mix some social stuff in for you!!

Four shells protection spell

Hellooo everyone! I did a lil something to celebrate summer since I’m finally officially on holiday! ♡

Materials:

• salt

•black pepper

•rose thorns (pins will work as well)

•sea water (you’ll need just a few drops)

•rosemary

•sage

•lavender

•seaglass

•basil

•4 candles (one for each element- I used blue for water, red for fire, black for earth and white for air.)

•marker

•4 sea shells (like these ☟)

☾1☽ Draw on the inside of the shells the symbols of the elements (one on each)

☾2☽ Light the candles, then place the herbs, salt and seaglass inside of each shell (the order does not matter). Sprinkle the sea water on the shells; while you do so visualize your goal, for example protecting your house from thunderstorms, from burglars… whatever you need

☾3☽ When you’re done, pour the wax of each candle on the corresponding shell to seal it.

☾4☽ Once the wax has cooled down, place the water seashell west, the air one east, the earth one north and the fire one south. 

You can bury them in the garden or if you don’t have one you can bury them in small jars. You can also keep them on the floor or forniture inside your house! ♡

∼Blue

Key Herbs for your Craft

Here are some really basic herbs for your magic workings :

Sage - Cleansing (properties : purification, wisdom, immortality)

Lavender - Calming (properties : love, healing, sleep, dreams, divination)

Rose - Opening (properties : psychic awareness, opening the heart, love)

Eucalyptus - Inspiration (properties : healing, protection, purification, invigorating)

Bay Leaves - Divination (properties : psychic powers, success, money)

Cardamom - Arousal (properties : lust, sexuality, reigniting intimacy)

Rosemary - Focus (properties : mental powers, banishing, purification, protection)

Bergamot - Increasing (properties : manifestation, wealth, success, prosperity, adds power to magic)

Oats - Grounding (properties : wealth, abundance, prosperity)

Dandelion - Releasing (properties : divination, wishes, summoning spirits, releasing)

Yarrow - Banishing  (properties : banishing, death, courage, psychic powers)

Cloves - Luck (properties : driving away negativity, cleansing, prosperity)