elegantly Kicks You In The Face

elegantly kicks you in the face

prussia x reader: childish games

Hello Lovelies~ Was ridiculously bored at work, and this silliness was birthed. Please enjoy!

Over the years, you had compiled a list of all the things you most loved about your husband, and somehow, only slightly surprising, his zest for life and the itch to have fun easily slotted its way into your top ten.

For someone nearing 1000 (a fact you loved teasing him with), you would have thought that he would have grown more reserved by now, bored and listless with the world. But the truth was that he was restless, and rarely allowed for a single dull moment.

And while you had grown yourself- maturity and social obligations demanding a certain image, he had a knack for making you forget all of it, embracing that whimsy and playful energy that you refused to completely abandon in your childhood.

Which was what often led to moments like these.

Gil was sitting across from you at a table in some cafe in Constanța, eyebrows furrowed in an almost comical way as he glared down at the series of incomplete triangles on your napkin.

A little riddle or trick- you couldn’t really decide which- you had briefly remembered from your childhood, one you knew would annoy your husband to no end.

As much as you loved him, he did have a habit of over-complicating things.

So far, his guesses had all followed a pattern you had expected: an ECG, a triangular sound wave, and then he rambled off something nearly incoherent involving quantum theory which had you giving him a Look. Seeing your expression at that last one had him offering you an embarrassed half-smile, before he went back to staring at the napkin with annoyance. “I’m going to hate myself when you tell me, right?”

It wasn’t really a question, but you hummed in acknowledgement, fighting and failing to hide your grin. “Probably.”

To his credit, he had more guesses, a couple theories, even asked if it had something to do with your own work, eyes slanting towards you in curious consideration. When you shot that down as well, he huffed melodramatically in defeat, flopping back into his chair and gesturing magnanimously towards the offending piece of recycled paper and its 18 unassuming little lines.

"Alright; you win. Hit me with it.“

You were enjoying this way too much, but you couldn’t help it; he brought out the best and worst in you. "Sure you don’t want another guess?”

"Can’t you just put me out of my misery instead?“

You leveled him with another look, fond and irritated all at once, catching too easily on the smile hidden in his words. "No martyrdom before supper.”

"Wow. Rude.“

Ignoring his comment, you spoke with perhaps a little too much presumption. "Gilbert Wilhelm? Prepare for me to blow your little mind.”

"You already do that every day.“ You bit your lip at his fond murmur, digging in your pocket for a different colored pen. Carrying an assortment had become a bit of a habit as of late; Gil was constantly losing his, and sometimes you just needed a change from the monotony of black-and-white.

Finally, you pulled out a purple, a good offset to the black. Pulling the napkin back into drawing range, you motioned for him to watch.

You took it slow, intentionally choosing the option that would take the longest for him to guess. He loved puzzles and thought experiments, and you wanted to savor this for as long as possible.

Starting with the furthest edge, you connected every third triangle with an inverse arc, the temporary image almost reminding you of the base of cartoon campfires. Gil was hovering over your shoulder now, having swapped chairs sometime in the past few moments.

You paused, intentionally drew your pen away long enough for him to analyze the new data, catalog the latest information. Some part of you had a feeling he would be trying the same trick on Vlad at the conference tomorrow, and you couldn’t fight your smile. "Want me to keep going, or do you want another minute?”

He hummed after a moment- a quiet acquiescence.

For a moment, you stared at your work in progress, contemplating your next move. With a small quirk to your lips, you scribbled what looked like three clouds, one for the top of each of the tallest triangles.

"Was zum Teufel,“ Gil demanded eloquently.

That was enough to finally make you giggle, turning to him with a smirk and a feigned attempt at innocence. He leveled you with a look of his own, before indicating with a pointed glance that you needed to continue.

You waggled your eyebrows in playful amusement, now turning to add two dots to each of the three connected shapes, followed by another cloud-like doodle at the based of each of the three tallest triangles.

As it stood, you could argue for some funky mountains or some kind of sailboat, but you were only half finished.

"One more guess?” you asked in an effort to be nice, to at least sound like you weren’t secretly enjoying his suffering. Instead of a proper answer, your ruse easily seen through, you received a poke at your waist, the lightest threat to continue.

Biting your lip, trying not to flinch away, you added six arrows- two per shape, each facing the center of its respective shape from the left and the right.

"Wait…“ Gil’s voice was scarcely a whisper at this point, teasing your neck. "Are those..?”

With a small triangle and two quick flourishes each, you announced the final results with pride, no longer holding back your giddy grin. “Behold: Three Cats in Party Hats!”

It was worth it just to see him bringing his palm to his forehead, hiding his face in his hand. You could see him fighting a smile though, and knew the last few minutes had done more than enough to help him out of his prior languor.

"I hate you sometimes; you know that?“

It was too affectionate to be true.

"Love you, too.”

Inspired by my remembering learning this about 20-ish years ago from some random guy while I was helping out at a market stall. He also taught me how to draw a cat by stacking C-A-T atop each other. Anyway, have some kitties~