Phew, My Brain Was Fried Today But I'm Finally Done With Installing Mods And Finishing My Oc Vanja!

tw: depression, anxiety disorder and suicidal thoughts

first of all, I'm doing okay again. I'm far from being all peachy still, but things are getting better slowly. And since it got pretty quiet on my blog I felt like sharing some thoughts and details of what happened the last months and what will happen on this blog, for those who wonder

I was already dealing with a lot of shit mentally, then one of my cats died and not long after that (around 9 months ago) my husband lost his job and let's say, everything went downhill afterwards

we both fell into a really bad depression and with both partners being on edge all the time with only dark thoughts, things could only go bad. It was a really rough time when my depression and anxiety disorder got so bad that I could barely take it anymore. I didn't have the strength for anything, even simple things like showering or eating were difficult tasks

I often thought about ending it all and tbh, I have no idea how I got through it or where I got the last bit of strength from, but the church actually helped us a lot, like literally

but like I mentioned before, things are getthing better. Much better. My husband started his new job this week and it's even a job he already loves and feels comfortable with. As for me, I'm in good, professional hands now and have a new therapist. And it seems he's finally a good one who can actually help me with all my bullshit. It's a long way from now on, because it seems there's more going on with me than I actually thought. It's possible that I might be on the spectrum and don't let me start with all the forms of anxiety disorder, plus the things I deal with for years now

from now on it can only get better again. I'm still on edge quite often, get panic attacks or just feel like I'm not really existing and float somewhere else in space or something. But I'll be more active again in the future. I take it easy for now though. I miss playing Sims and other games or just enjoying my hobbies to the fullest. As for my custom content, I will start sharing again. Mostly smaller things like jewelry and accessories. No hairstyles or clothes though. I put too much time and work into these and, honestly, it still pisses me off that there are people selling my content and earning money with my efforts. It probably stopped by now, but because it can happen again in the future, I just don't feel like sharing "more time consuming" creations

posts like that won't happen often since recently I feel better with keeping my emotions and thoughts to myself and far away from tumblr (or social media in general), but because of the long break I felt like sharing a bit today

thanks for reading, enjoy your days to the fullest and take care of yourself 💜

working on a new oc (and hair)

Where can we find your ts4 cc? Sad to see no more sims hairs being made, I so eagerly stalked your tumblr for new uploads, Hope everything is well <3

simfileshare links should still work, but you have to check reblogs for the posts or rebels/the vault for my older cc (or other simfileshare reuploads)

I won't share my hairs anymore on my blog because of the pricks who kept making money with them, but when you find them somewhere else do with them what you want

for other future cc I move my sims content to my second blog, but I'll post a note for that when I do so

source

just wanted to take a quick photo of my oc and then saw all the blood sdhshdh

I'm not done downloading mods and only wanted to test a little... and ended up playing for hours

so I finally bought Baldur's Gate 3 ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂)⸝♡

Long time no see 🤗

got out of my comfort zone and started with some clothes

my beloved murder wife (who is definitely not about to step on me)

lord have mercy, I just googled

this shit's cracking me up and the "graphic design is my passion vibe" makes it even funnier😭

asking for money for... that? Really?

every AI generated Sims 4 CC mesh I see makes me die a little inside.

yes, we can tell it's AI. yes it looks like shit. yes charging for it makes you look like even more like a clown.

Me when people replace Gaz: