The Fact There's NO Content Of CSam And CGeorge Being Father And Son Is So Evil. Like Plssss Guys CGeorge

Dick: You have a brother?? Is he Talia and Bruce’s too?

Damian: Of course, we share the same parentage after all.

Tim: How old is he?

Damian: He says it reset after he went into the Lazarus pit. So he’s 3.

(Bruce is in the background blue screening that he has another child with Talia that he didn’t know about.)

——-

3 years ago

——

Damian: How old are you?

Jason, unsure if he can count those 6 months in the ground: I’m a few days, cause I went into the Lazarus pit and it went back to 0.

It’s always “evil Superman!!!!” this, or “villain justice league!!!” that.

I want an AU of villain! Bruce who’s absolutely dog-shit at being evil.

Firstly: The worst thing he can think of doing is not donating to animal shelters or charities . immediately feels so guilty he throws up.

Secondly: The second a child cries because of him, he’d freeze up. Stand like a statue, unmoving and petrified. No more evil, but just today.

He ends up helping the city by accident more often than not, and to his immortal disappointment, Gotham loves both the Bat and Bruce Wayne.

“alfred come look at my evil plan”

“Yes, sir, “ Alfred is very indulgent. He does his best to pretend it’s actually good. “ ‘Don’t say please to the barista’. Getting bold, are we?”

EVERYTIME He and Clark meet and Bruce monologues about pulverizing him to dust, Clark (and the League) looks at him like this:

“I can make him worse,” GOOD FOR YOU!!! Clark can make him into his malewife and adopt his 7 evil sidekicks who actually know how to villain. Especially the little one.

local fail boy and his hot goth wife

oracle, ban this guy

(some shitpost while i work on that bernard comic)

Okay this is kinda a stupid thought I had once I got over the craziness of Odysseus.

All the like middle aged men are dead cuz of the war except for the weak and cowardly

And now Odysseus has killed all the suitors which was basically all the younger men of Ithaca. Plus some faraway princes and such

So in doing that he basically made Telemachus the most eligible bachelor in all of Ithaca and the neighboring kingdom.

His first day as a dad and he’s already wingmaning his son

it's not exactly your prompt but that's only because wade & peter start hooking up Long before spider-man and deadpool do

🕷️ written by me & nevi

Evolution…

any fics where a tommy from an au gets transported to cannon? i dunno if this makes sense, any dimension travel is fine really (ive already read rewind and cannon!tommy in a vigilante au)

Heyo!! Yeah, I have some fics for you! :D

Here they are:

don’t put me to rest by MementoMemoriam [Rated T, 59540 words, incomplete, last updated December 2021]

He couldn’t tell Phil or Techno. They probably would think he’s crazy, and how does he even explain the situation anyways? “Oh yeah, I just went to bed after being exiled from my country in another timeline and woke up here. Sorry for the trouble, guys!”

What are they going to do when they find out he’s not their Tommy?

Oh god. What happened to their Tommy? Is he in Tommy’s world?

Tommy feels himself grow even more sick at the thought. Phil and Techno would kill him if they found out he’d sent their Tommy to that hell. That hell with exile, and war, and Dream.

-

In which Tommy, exiled hero of the DreamSMP, and Prince Tommy of the Antarctic Empire swap places, families are semi-reunited, and Dream causes problems (as always).

Shells in the Foam (a Hermit!Tommy fanfic) by Cedarwhisp21 [Rated T, 90720 words, incomplete, last updated January 2022]

When Dream attacks Tommy in Logestshire, Tommy runs. Badly injured, he somehow manages to slip between worlds and wakes up in a badlands biome, on a server far from home, with no other players in sight.

The Hermits are surprised when a new player logs in, and confused when no-one’s at spawn. Five days later, after waiting for the new player to introduce themselves, Xisuma uses his admin abilities to access their coordinates. He takes Impulse with him to welcome the new player to Hermitcraft, but instead of the beginnings of a base, they find something a lot more concerning.

AU belongs to @pertrichormeraki on Tumblr. I just wanted to write something.

Somewhere New? by HoneyBee420 [Rated G, 2717 words, incomplete, last updated October 2021]

Passerine!Tommy and DSMP!Tommy switch places after each of their deaths, let’s see where this will go.

you don’t bring me flowers anymore by Shrai [Rated T, 33765 words, incomplete, last updated December 2021]

There’s that deep visceral type of sadness that finds a home inside your bones and never seems to leave. Some days it’s ignorable, just a minor obstacle in your day. Other times it’s loud and true, grasping at every inch of your being and filling your senses with such emotion that it feels like it’s too much. Regret, sadness, anger. All of them add up to what swallowed the brothers up whole: grief.

Even though they had Tommy back that feeling still rang true in their hearts. Their Tommy was still dead and gone, forgotten if fate decides it so. If this Tommy, this strange and broken and angry Tommy, stuck around, were they expected to forget about their Tommy?

~

or: i heard someone say “what if passerine wilbur and techno met dsmp tommy” and my brain has not stopped thinking since please

You Can’t Whisper Above the Thunder (But You Can Fly Anywhere) by AliveAndRestless [Rated T, 20701 words, incomplete, last updated February 2021]

He hears birdsong.

That’s the first thing he notices, when he’s able to breathe past the pain in his ribs. When he opens his eyes to green leaves and a blue summer sky, he thinks he’s dreaming. The sky is never blue in the Dream SMP, not after all the explosions. It’s always tinged with grey, the scent of ash and wood smoke subtle in the air. When was the last time he was somewhere with clean air? Exile?

He sits up. The pain is blinding, but he grits his teeth against it, hands tight around the wound in his side. He looks around, really looks around, and it takes everything he has to keep from screaming. Nothing but woods on every side, trees swaying gently in a warm breeze, birds flittering from branch to branch. Fuck.

He falls back with a thump, and immediately regrets it, hissing in pain. Well, one thing’s for sure. He’s not in fucking Kansas anymore.

(Alternatively, Tommy gets gravely injured, and to save his life, Dream drop kicks him to a different server. Unfortunately for him, it has the opposite effect than what he was expecting.)

sorry danny, sam will never think you’re cool

Quite possibly the funniest shit I have ever seen in my life