I Could Speak Endlessly About The Things That Make Victor And Yuuri An Amazing Couple, But This One Really

I could speak endlessly about the things that make Victor and Yuuri an amazing couple, but this one really stood out to me: their insecurities.

(some of this is kinda headcanon, but it’s based on what is implied in canon)

It’s evident from the beginning that Yuuri sees himself as not enough. He doesn’t think he’s good enough, attractive enough, sexy enough, or talented enough to be Victor’s student. These fears introduce his struggle with anxiety long before he enters his first Grand Prix competition. He doesn’t think he’s good enough to deserve Victor’s attention, he doesn’t think he’s talented enough to beat Yurio, he doesn’t think he can keep Victor in Hasetsu with him when the world wants him back in Russia, competing.

And although his confidence grows throughout the series, his self-doubt is still very evident in their argument in episode 11. Yuuri doesn’t think his career is worth more than Victor’s career. Yuuri doesn’t even consider the romantic value of their relationship, only comparing the success of their careers, because even with all the validation he receives from Victor, he doesn’t know just how much his love means to Victor, and he’s scared of overestimating it. Yuuri’s ongoing fear is not being enough.

Victor, on the other hand, is an enigma. Throughout the show, Yuuri’s unreliable narration makes it difficult to know exactly how Victor feels. Victor is scared of being too much. When he arrived in Hasetsu, he was expecting a very different welcome— something akin to the sensual, sexy, confident dancer he encountered at the banquet— and is instead greeted by a shy, unconfident skater, who can’t grasp why Victor would be there to coach him of all people.

Though Victor initially tried to coax Yuuri out of his shell by being extremely forward, he realized that he needs to give Yuuri his space, and meet him in the middle— not force Yuuri to let him in when he’s not ready. Yuuri challenges Victor in episode 4 by telling Victor to be himself. For so long, Victor had been performing in every aspect of his life; every season wiping the slate clean and beginning again, constructing a new persona for himself. He was seen as a force of nature, a whirlwind, a god. Nobody has ever asked him to be himself before. He’s afraid he’s too messy, too impulsive, too Victor to be what Yuuri wants, which is why he asks Yuuri to give him a role in the first place.

Although Victor’s extra-ness is far from lacking in the following episodes, he’s significantly toned down how direct he is, and instead motivates and challenges Yuuri through his small touches and words. When Yuuri is crying in the parking garage in episode 7, Victor doesn’t know how to react, and slips back into a suave bachelor persona— “Should I just kiss you or something?”— in order to keep his messy self hidden; the kind that doesn’t know how to handle when people cry, the kind that acts impulsively, the kind that really doesn’t know what he’s doing. And Yuuri challenges him again. He doesn’t want Victor to be fake, to hide his true self behind a mask. He just wants Victor to stand by him, as himself. This could be another reason why Victor was so angry when Yuuri wanted to end things for the sake of Victor’s career. Victor had given himself, all of his whole, messy, impulsive, imperfect, balding self to Yuuri, who wanted to give it up for the sake of Victor’s suffocating career, his persona as The World’s Most Eligible Bachelor, God of Figure Skating, Victor Nikiforov. It felt like a rejection of his true self, the one that was shown to Yuuri after he painfully tore down all the walls he had to protect his fragile heart. Victor is afraid that his true self is too much.

But together, they fit together like a puzzle piece. When Victor is afraid he’s too much, Yuuri embraces all of it— all of the messiness, all of the tears, shattering those masks one by one and letting them pick up the pieces together. When Yuuri is afraid he’s not enough, Victor helps him build himself back up, showing him that he is strong and deserving of everything he has.

They are perfect for each other.