Answered A Scam Call Today And Had The Most Bizarre Conversation

the other day i had a fortune cookie and there was simply no fortune in it and i felt that 

Important note to all Dracula fans - Coca-Cola was invented in 1886, and the story is set in 1897. This means you can authentically hint at coca-cola in any and all fanworks set around the book’s time period.

(not that it’s very impressive, since Dracula himself wouldn’t drink it, but certainly the American suitor can!)

oh shit I took a wrong turn at Michaels and wandered directly into the dragon aisle send help

History class is really just catching you up to speed on everything you missed before you were born.

me as a dm: alright im gonna need y'all to make a vibe check

alright so Pangur got her claw stuck while rolling over in bed, and then just GAVE UP, which led to her being horizontally flattened in a way that gives her impossible girth and...... I'll share, but just know that it's an optical illusion. please. I swear to god she's a healthy weight. I mean, a little chubby, but not like this.

frail newborn Thing

Be delicate