"i Knew You Would Come Back."

can we start using "a ridiculous amount of gold" and "a dragon's horde" as legitimate sums of money everyone just KNOWS the exact number/amount for without specifying in fantasy novels, fanfics (aus), whatever forms of media we can reasonably add it to?

Okay but imagine Yuuri retires from competitive figure skating at 27, and he decides to go back to college to become a teacher.

So this boy walks into class sporting the just-rolled-out-of-bed look with the sex hair and the big comfy sweater and the starbucks cup in one hand.

And you know, he’s enjoying his life, he makes friends in his program and on the weekends he helps his husband teach cute little kids how to skate and they have this cozy little house together in a nice neighbourhood. He probably has girls and guys falling for him left and right.

And then one day, Yuuri’s out with his friends, and they’re at a cafe or something.

And a group of girls comes up to them, and they’re all blushing and nudging each other saying “You talk first!”.

So Yuuri just turns this absolutely blinding smile on them and asks, “Autographs?”

The girls squeak, and nod furiously.

“Sure!” he says, reaching out for the notebooks they’re holding out for him to sign.

And about ten minutes later, after several selfies and autographs and a lot of gushing and squealing and “Please let Viktor know we’re looking forward to Yuratchka’s upcoming season,” the girls leave.

So Yuuri turns back to his friends, and they’re all just staring at him with wide eyes and gaping mouths.

Yuuri kinda wonders if there’s something on his face.

The first thing that comes out of anyone’s mouths is, “…who’s Viktor?”

And Yuuri’s kinda confused as he replies, “….my husband?”

“YOU’RE MARRIED!?!?!?!?” his friends all shriek.

Yuuri looks down at his hand to make sure his ring is still there. “Yeah?” he says, holding his hand up.

“I thought that was just a fashion statement!” one of the girls exclaims.

“Why did they want your autograph though?” asks another of his friends, and Yuuri just looks away sheepishly.

“I’m…uh….a retired competitive figure skater?” he asks, his voice going higher with embarrassment. “And I…uh…got 2 golds in the Grand Prix…and 2 golds in Worlds….and maybe a silver in Pyeongchang?”

His voice gets progressively quieter as his face gets even redder.

His friends are staring at him in horror and shocked disbelief now.

And he thinks he might as well get it all out now.

“And…my husband might be the most decorated athlete in figure skating history?”

Fics based on this post:

A Name I’ve Heard Somewhere by GwenChan (@gwen-chan)

A Prince in Disguise by lourthor (@kurtdontcurr)

A Real Life Cinnamon Roll by Seito (@seitosokusha)

And the answer is… by nessiesaur

anonymous by eu_nao_sou_um_chapeu (@eu-nao-sou-um-chapeu)

Comfort Zone by BertholdvonMoosburg

Did I Forget to Mention… by nevereverever

Ethical Dilemmas in Sports Psychology: When Googling Your Friend Gets Weird by Adrianners (@adrianners)

How do you not know? by missykristy

icebreaker by Cesare

It’s like some surprisingly inclusive and irritatingly sugar-coated rom-com by RocioWrites (@rocioandthatsall)

Long time no see by ddugeun (@chukichi)

My Fun Fact Is: by stillmadaboutpetra

New Friends by viktuuri (@softvictory)

Now I Know by CassidyMoffett (@sweettigerotakureviews​)

Of College Classes and Googling Friends by IceIceSkaters

Outed By Victuuri Smut by Anonymous

Storytime: Celebrity Blindness by likestoimagine (@likestoimagine16)

Tale of the Russian Punk and the Japanese Cinnamon Roll by JamieAvenBell

The Internet Exists for a Reason by tomorrowsdreams

The Moment of Truth by little_miss_laughs_alot

The Secret Life of Professor Katsuki by FreakingOutGirl

This is Why You Google People by StarlightPhoenix (@cleverlittlejay)

Trivia Night by RinaRose (@marina-and-the-fandoms)

Wait, What? by @realisticallycynical 

Yuuri Katsuki-Induced Feels by @i-w-p-chan

~If you want to officially gift your work to me, my AO3/FFN penname is SkyGem!~

Tumblr posts/additions for this post:

Hilarious addition by @p3hero​

Comic by @lauravian

On why Yuuri’s friends don’t know about Viktor by @blindiemac

Retirement au: Yura edition

Retirement au: Viktor edition by @rocioandthatsall

Translations of this post:

Italian by @randomwalksoul

If anything, I feel the urge to write more Yuri On Ice fanfiction. To keep reading amazing Yuri on Ice fanfiction. To draw more Yuri on Ice art. To purchase more doujin and support work of talented people who still create Yuri on Ice content/stories.

Yuri!!!on Ice is eternal.

The fandom made it timeless. And the fandom will keep it alive, no matter what happens.

Born to Make History, forever.

Favourite ship dynamic: no one truly knows what exactly is going on between the two characters, including the characters themselves. But whatever it is, it's written in the fabric of the universe.

and if you turn to ur left you’ll see the emos

you can pry happy endings from my cold-dead hands. It can be the most heart stopping, gut wrenching fic that has every existed and I will read every drop of it if I get my happy ending. I have had enough painful endings in real life, give me happy in my fantasy world. It can be at the last second, it can be a single sentence, even a single word. Give me all the angst and hurt in the world for 500,000 words, but please give me the comfort I need in the ending. please and thank you.

Batman AU

Batman tells Gordon that he doesn't kill. Thinking that it's a legality issue, Gordon deputizes Batman and gives him a gun and badge. Batman of course doesn't use the gun and just figures Gordon is stressed.

After Joker kills a Robin, Gordon starts to deputize the Batfam members.

Gordon: Next time you see that clown. Take. The. Shot. Rookie.

Robin (Tim, tiny ass 14 year old holding a 45 magnum): Umm... Yes sir?

Batman (plus all the Rogues, minions, and citizens of Gotham when Robin shows up with a 45 Magnum):

How do you kill a God?

Aphrodite laughs, head tossed back with stars in her hair, ‘We are immortal. We are ageless. We will never die.’ 

How do you kill a God?

Hera sighs, ‘You rob them of love and loyalty. They will be alone and unhappy, and eternity will seem like a punishment, but it is not death.’ 

How do you kill a God?

Zeus declares, rather confidently, ‘You deny them their power. Poseidon nods his head in agreement. ‘They will be weak and defeated, perhaps even chopped up into pieces, but it is not death.’ 

How do you kill a God?

Apollo closes his eyes. ‘You strip them of their senses. Their eyes, and they cease to see. Their ears, and they are rendered silent. They will be in the dark, conscious and cut off for millennium, but it is not death.’

How do you kill a God?

Hades whispers, though still his voice carries, ‘With another God. An immortal for an immortal. Era for an Era. A celestial being to strip another’s soul. He pauses, the rest are silent. ‘A God for a God.’

L.H.Z // How do you kill a God?

sometimes you need dialogue tags and don't want to use the same four