Figured A Work Around For The Tech Error From Yesterday

So apparently Tumblr ate my original post about this but:

A couple weeks ago I’m going to get lunch and as I open the fridge, my mother attempts to communicate to me that any chicken currently in the fridge is ok for people to eat, because the chicken that was intended for the dog to eat has been used up.

What she actually says is, “That’s human chicken.”

After taking a minute to process all horrible implications of the phrase “human chicken”, I decide to go a different route and hold the tupperware of chicken out to my sister, saying, “Behold, a man!”

This was evidently the wrong choice, as it meant I had to explain to my parents who Diogenes was, thereby cementing the incident in their minds and leading to me, just now, opening the fridge to see the following incredibly cursed image:

My Pathfinder group is starting a new campaign. We’re all making character sheets and we have a new member who has never played any table top RPG before.

New Player: Is my health just my hit die or do I add anything to it? Because I really don’t wanna walk into a dungeon with only 6 health…

Me: You add your Constitution modifier to it, I think.

New Player: Ah, 4 health… much better…

Once my friend Henry was accused of wearing wireless headphones by a substitute so she said for him to hand them over so he took them off and handed them to her. Then later on she asked him a question and he didn’t respond so she said it louder and he still didn’t respond. She asked why he was not responding and he said “I can’t understand you ma'am, you took my hearing aids.”

Happy Valentine's!

Merry Christmas!!!!

Reblog this post with the third gif in the gif search of your favorite movie

Day 29!, outfits, jon in Martians sweater anyone?

@emerald-emerlad

I was walking through the toy aisle at Target when I found this thing and had a VIOLENT AND IMMEDIATE FLASHBACK to when JP first came out and they had a bunch of REALLY COOL T Rex toys that I would have sold one of my scrawny small-child limbs for but my mother wouldn’t get me one because they were “too violent and also ate people” :(

just a reminder:

kids and teens are allowed to be angry without having that anger dismissed as a “tantrum” or “hormones”. they’re allowed to be angry with adults, including their parents and teachers, without being dismissed as “disrespectful”.

they’re allowed to be sad without being dismissed as being “moody” or “whiny”. they’re allowed to feel resentment without being dismissed as “ungrateful”. they’re allowed to be uncomfortable without being dismissed as “oversensitive”.

they’re allowed to feel restless without being dismissed as “badly behaved”. they’re allowed to feel lonely without being dismissed as “attention-seeking”. they’re allowed to be tired without being dismissed as “lazy”.

young people’s emotions are valid, despite the fact that our language has an entire vocabulary designed to make them feel otherwise.

ladybug, after seeing chat noir detransform: you’re adrien agreste!?!?

adrien, internally: quick act dumb!

adrien: who’s adrien agreste

adrien, internally: not that dumb!!!