YOU Hate Christopher Columbus.

“dude” but like romantically

and before the clowns show up:

okay, sure, but ravens absolutely qualify as omens

crows aren't "death omens" or "evil" you fool they're just funky little dudes

​we are all iguana

I'm a teacher assistant for spanish grammar and the professor was explaining epícenos (single gendered words that encompass masculine and feminine beings) and he was using iguana as an example and he said: "there is only one gender... iguana" and i had to mute my microphone

We’ve all been wearing masks for the last few years to prevent the spread of covid-19 and still could recognize each other, or at least the people that we saw daily, and yet no one has addressed superhero masks that cover like their eyebrows and the bridge of their nose. By those half mask standards, I have a secret identity too. We all do. Except the Karens who wouldn’t wear masks. They’re the villains who want attention from the media. #artimitateslife #andlifeimitatesart

But like seriously, superhero masks are something we should just call plot holes by 2020 after the coronavirus mask mandates. Just think about the whole love square in Miraculous Ladybug. Listen, Marinette, if I can recognize my crush when the bottom half of their face is covered then you should be able to recognize Adrien in what is essentially a pair of sunglasses. Guess you haven’t longingly stared into his eyes as much as the show would have us believe.

There’s also Steve not recognizing Bucky on the bridge before his muzzle fell off (though I will give him a break because his bf HAD been dead for over seventy years to his knowledge) so from now on I will be imagining that the Russos just forgot to show us Steve’s inner monologue of “isn’t that Bucky?? No Bucky is dead :( wait but what if it is Bucky?? I mean Coulson came back. And Loki. Loki has come back many times. Wait okay no I think I’d recognize that icey blue glare from decades away, that’s the Bucky look for ‘Steve I told you not to do the thing why did you do the thing I’m gonna kill you’ except this time he’s actually trying to kill me,,,, oh is hIS MASK FALLING OFF oh is that his mask there on the ground oH I KNEW IT WAS “Bucky??”

And I know people have talked about why it actually would make sense that the lack of glasses would make it hard for the world to know that Superman is Clark Kent but I’m gonna bring this one up anyways because guys we can all recognize one of our coworkers without their glasses on there is NO WAY that Lois Lane a woman who’s PROFESSION is deduction of events which she then reports to the general public cannot recognize her coworker in a costume. If you saw the lady who works at the front desk in a cheerleader outfit you’d still know it was her, but Lois can’t for some reason do the same with Clark?? She does her journalism all day with her right hand man Clark by her side RIGHT UP UNTIL she reports on Superman (which she does quite often, might I add) who is just Clark in spandex and No Glasses™️ and you’re telling me that this lady has no idea they’re the same person??? She works with one of them all day and then is gazing at reporting on the other one the rest of the time and has no idea??? Also I get that Clark is the alias and he’s actually Superman the man from Krypton which is why he makes less effort to conceal his face as Superman because that’s him and Clark covers up with glasses because it’s a clever plot device to show which one is his true self, but can we talk about how he MAKES LESS EFFORT TO CONCEAL HIMSELF AS SUPERMAN AND YET ALL THE PEOPLE HE KNOWS AS CLARK STILL DO NOT KNOW HE IS SUPERMAN???

I’M OFFICIALLY COMING FOR ALL COMIC BOOK ARTISTS, DIRECTORS, ANIMATORS, AND PRODUCERS WHO DON’T COVER THEIR CHARACTERS ENTIRE FACE AND PRETEND THEIR IDENTITY IS STILL IN TACT. IF THE PANDEMIC HAS PROVEN ONE THING ITS THAT IF YOU KNOW A FACE YOU KNOW THAT FACE AND HALF A MASK DOES NOT CHANGE THAT SEND TWEET

in my room on a saturday evening talking to myself like this

man inflation's hittin hard

RIP TO MY MAIN MAN PRINCE PHILLIP. BARTHOLOMEW’S ORGANS WERE NOT ENOUGH TO SUSTAIN YOU. DEATH IS CRUEL AND CAME FOR YOU FAR TOO SOON, MY DUKE.

prince phillips organs shutting down like cascading dominos while the doctors frantically stuff him full of replacements harvested from kidnapped street orphans

we must

we must imagine sisyphus as an absolute thottie