I’m Such A “i Want Your Attention” But “won’t Bother You” Kinda Person

Be careful of Asexuals y'all, I heard they aren't fucking around

Im literally sobbing I found a list I made describing the keys from Locke and key (tv version) as I was watching the series when it first came out bc I think I wanted to write fanfiction so I made it to keep track of all the keys?? But the way I described them was so weird and also inaccurate for several (tbf some details u don't find out until later in the season and I hadn't made it that far idt) and I completely totally forgot about the entire thing until just now when I went through my Google docs

so for all people who dont watch locke.and key here's a rundown of most of the keys that are introduced in the first season, written by me probably as I watched the show in real time

spoilers might be here I think?? Idk I'm just posting it because I found them kind of funny esp since I couldn't remember writing it At All

***

Making a list of keys here so i dont forget:

Ghost Key: allows u to astral project and go outside of your body and talk to dead ppl. Very cool right. Unfortunately if u forget to go back through the door or someone else closes it before you go back through yourself and take out the key, you become a permanent ghost. Whoopsies!!

Anywhere Key: can take u wherever u want to go as long as youve been there or have seen a door there. It cant take u where u havent been bitch. So dont even think about ur crush’s pants

Puppet Key (also known as the music box key): when inserted into the music box and the music is playing, that person can control other peoples actions. Pretty damn scary

Mending Key: i think if u put something in a certain cabinet thats broken and then lock and unlock it it comes out fixed?? Idfk. does not work on people. sorry grandma

Head Key: theres a nasty lil hole that appears in the back of ur neck and when you insert it you can go into your mind and do shit!! And even put things in and/or take out shit like personality traits and memories and whatnot. I wouldnt go near this thing tbh. Don't try puttin nothing in my neck u dont need to see my mind

Flower/Plant Key(?? I dont think it has an actual name): it unlocks a tree and then memories in paint jars rise out of the ground?? I dont actually know what this one does. Something to do with memories idk Edit: this should have been fuckin obvious but it controls plants :))

Mirror Key: u put it in a mirror and then an evil you will appear in the reflection and beckon you forward like “come to pappy” and you can go through the mirror and end up in an evil funhouse thingy with lots of mirrors and versions of yourself?? Apparently lots of people have died trying to get out and its a prison of self?? He had to go in with a rope around his waist to get his mom out?? 0/10 would not recommend you might die

Echo Key: “can bring people back”-random guy offscreen, 2020. Apparently if you use it to unlock the wellhouse and then yell someones name into the well like you at le jour d’amour (spoiler alert that person gotta be dead) an “echo” of them will come back and u can talk to them. Its considered disrespectful to use it tbh because u disturbing the dead

Identity Key: basically an identity crisis meets polyjuice potion. A keyhole appears under ur chin and then you insert it and turn the key and then you can look like someone else. Eww gross!! 

Matchstick Key: a lighter. You touch it to something or put it in a keyhole or wHATEVER idc, and whatever u put it in bursts into flames. Fun fact, this also works on people!! Haven’t you ever wanted to just set yourself on fire? Well now you can with the Matchstick Key!! Limited edition because a demon stole it from a child then pushed said child onto train tracks. Also spoiler alert if you use it on yourself you die. Because u fuckin set yourself on fire. What did u expect, to not spontaneously combust??

Shadow Key: Key for the Crown of Shadows. I think u put it in the crown of shadows and then it works. It summons shadow kreechurs to work 4U. Very awesome ikr

Omega Key: literally has no other purpose than to unlock one specific door. The Omega Door (very original name oooh scary ooooh *ghost noises*). Beyond this door lie unimaginable eldritch abominations that Will Definitely Kill You. so unless you want to die at the hands of shadow demons, this aint the key for u. Use it as a mantle decoration or something

Writing Websites

1. a website with a list of superpowers and what they are

2. a website that generates random au ideas

3. a website that generates names, basic info and futures in a bunch of languages

4. a website that checks your grammar

5. website that lists types of execution in the states

6. a website with info on death certificates

7. a website with info on the four manners of death

8. a website with info on the black plague

9. website with information on depression

10. a website with info on the four types of suicide

11. website that lists famous quotes

12. website with different kinds of quotes

13. a website with info on food in every country

14. a website with a list of different colors

15. website with a list of medieval jobs

16. website with a list of fabrics

17. website with a list of flowers and pictures

18. website with a list of flowers and no pictures

19. website with a list of poisonous plants

20. website with a list of poisonous and non-poisonous plants

21. website with a list of things not to feed your animals

22. website with a list of poisons that can be used to kill people

23. website with info on the international date line

24. website with a list of food allergies

25. website with a list of climates

26. website with info on allergic reactions

27. website with info on fahrenheit and celsius 

28. website with info on color blindness

29. website with a list of medical equipment

30. website with a list of bugs

31. website with an alphabetic list of bugs and their scientific name

32. website with a list of eye colors

33. website (wikipedia sorry) with list of drinks

34. website with a list of religions

35. website with a list of different types of doctors and what they do

36. website (wikipedia again sorry) with a list of hair colors

37. website that generates fantasy names

38. website with a list of body language

39. website with a list of disabilities

40. website with an alphabetic list of disabilities

So, India is dying.

Look, I know a good number of you are from the US and things aren't amazing there either, but my country is literally on the brink of collapse. So I'd love it if we could talk about that for a minute.

If you can't do anything else, please just read and reblog.

A second COVID wave has taken out the healthcare system. There are no more hospital beds. There's an oxygen shortage. There's a critical vaccine shortage. The Central Government has thrown its hands up and is passing the baton to the State Governments to do what they can.

There are over 16 million covid cases. A record 330,000 new cases reported yesterday - comparable to the US at its peak. 187,000 dead as of today.

There is no plan.

Mass cremations are taking place. The cremation grounds are running day and night and they are short on wood. People are watching their loved ones die while waiting for a hospital bed, and then they're unable to give them the proper burial rights.

Hospitals are overwhelmed. Patients are being confined, two to a bed. They're the lucky ones.

We are on the verge of people dying in the streets.

This is the second-most populous country in the world. The largest democracy. A country that encapsulates over 15,000 years of recorded human history and has endured everything from famine to invasion to colonisation.

We might be at the end. This might be the thing that does us in.

People are dying.

People are dying.

People are dying and there is no plan.

More good news? Variants are popping up. A double mutation strain has shown up. It is resistant to current vaccines. This will not go away. This is the devastation they warned of when the anti-maskers were out protesting the minor inconvenience of covering their face in public.

My country is on the verge of an emergency state. Our government has failed us. This is as dire a situation as it ever could be.

Look. I don't do much with my life. I write fics, some of you have read them and that's pretty much it. I spend my days with my head in the clouds because that's where I like to be.

But two days ago, my grandmother tested positive, had to be taken to hospital and the ambulance caught fire.

She barely made it to the urgent care she needs.

So, here I am, using whatever meager platform I have to cobble this request together. Because I have to do something.

If you can, donate.

Or spread the word.

Help. Please.

For your appreciation: Robby standing on his tippy toes to peer through the window

10 Questions Every Fic Writer Secretly Wants to be Asked

There are a lot of fic questions that float around online, but rarely do they ever ask specific questions about the fics themselves. Ask any writer one or more of these ten questions to learn more about the fic and show support.

1. Of the fics you’ve written, which is your favorite and why?

2. Which scene was your favorite to write in [title of fic]?

3. Which part of [title] was hardest to write?

4. If you could change anything in [title], what would it be?

5. Did you make an outline for [title]? Did you stick to it?

6. Which scenes did you cut, and which were added in [title]?

7. Who was your favorite character to write in [title]?

8. Which came first, the title or the fic?

9. Which idea came to you first in [title]?

10. What are some facts readers may not know about [title]?

childhood emotion of wanting a dragon that is your friend so bad that it feels like there is a vacuum in your soul that only a dragon who is your friend can fill

the you that was and the you that is walk into a bar

When it comes to asexual allyship a lot of people wanna have their cake and eat it too (pun unintended). People like a lil 'aces are valid' moment but don't actually unpack compulsory sexuality. People see sexless queer representation and always clock puritanism before they ever clock asexuality. No one's actually reading the ace theory and texts coming out. Everyone keeps doing surprised Pikachu faces whenever a conservative or TERF says they're against asexuality despite the fact ace activists have been saying since day conservatives are not anti sex but anti sexual autonomy. 'Aces are queer' until we actually are. Even ace support posts keep ending with some expectation or condition that asexuality is #valid as long as asexuals still perform a small quota of sex/sexual activity. I'm so over 'Aces still have sex!' 'Aces are hot' Aces are sexy' 'Aces aren't virgin vanilla prude sexless puritans!' disguised as support.

Like no. Sorry. Until you accept that some asexual people's no is permanent, that some asexual's singleness is permanent, that some asexual's childless-ness is permanent, that some asexuals are the 'no' in little to no sexual attraction and i'd say most importantly, that queer sexlessness isn't a biological, social or moral failing, I don't believe you'll ever genuinely support asexuality. (In reverse, I also feel similar about aromanticism and romance).

Like a lot of u haven't gone beyond 'the a isn't for ally' and it shows. I don't want people to support asexuals just because we're soooo hot or because we write the best smut apparently or because we could have hypothetical sex or because we could do hypothetical kink or because our minds are soooo dirty actually or because we'd do romance reallllyyyy well or because we can still have kids or because asexuals hand out water bottles at the orgy or some shit. I want people to support asexuality because no sexuality is deviant and it's basic human decency.